Bill McCormick's Blog, page 13

McMore McSciFi for McYou

First off, as I announced on social media, The Big Wakeup Call, starring Ryan Gatenby (and occasionally tolerating me), is going on a brief hiatus. I did not say it was “yanked off the air by the man.” Nor did I say “(our) witto feewings got hurt” so we shut it all down. Just for the record, after twelve years of this I can assure you more than one keyboard warrior has tried to hurt our “witto feewings” and we’re still around. Heck over the years I have managed to quit smoking, drinking, and being single. My “witto feewings” are just fine. No, simply put, we’re freaking busy. Ryan’s in the process of expanding his media empire and setting the stage for global domination. Or more money. I think he’d be fine either way. As for me, last week I shared two important developments in the land of McSciFi and this week I will share more.

Scroll down to keep reading. I wouldn’t want you to get bored.

First off, the lovely and talented Cyril Brown is diving back into the deep end with a brand new title for the Hybrid Zero multiverse. For those of you who may have recently arrived, allow me to quickly summarize Cyril’s mad genius. In his multiverse everything happens contemporaneously but each universe is at a different chronological point. So, one may be in the thirtieth century while it’s next universe neighbor might just now be learning about their version of Boy George. It’s a lot of fun keeping those time lines straight.

Thus far, the multi-dimensional epic Juggernaut – often lauded as the perfect skewer for the military industrial complex, Jungle Grrl – a biting satire aimed at capitalist hypocrisy, and Cassandra and the Changeling Sword – a glorious look at mythoi throughout time that has a singing sword and a galactic turtle, are all out now.

BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!

Into the fray comes Neutrinos – a pan-galactic mockery of the music business, capitalism, and anything that gets in its way. Neutrinos is the multiverse’s first, all silent, NC-17 intergalactic rock opera. Think of it as the story you never wanted but always needed. Hearkening back to legendary, and salacious, creations from the 70s such as Flesh Gordon and Fritz the Cat, Neutrinos manages to hide deep social commentary amidst copious amounts of laughter and sex.

Actually, that can be said about all of Cyril’s works.

Use the links above to catch up, if you haven’t already done so, and strap in or strap it on (as the case may be) for another exciting adventure set in the Hybrid Zero multiverse.

As any indie science fiction author can attest, unless the first book in your absolutely awesome, totally epic, series sells around a million copies, by the time you get to the fourth you’re pretty much selling to friends and family only. And the number of friends can be counted on a closed fist.

But, sometimes, reality takes a back seat and starts making out with the sexy beast known as absurdity (with thanks to Camus and Kierkegaard) and all sorts of odd noises and wonderful things begin to happen. Such is the case with Goptri of the Mists: Kitaab Ek. The fourth release in the The Brittle Riders trilogy, Goptri has benefited from a confluence of unusual events.

Between The Brittle Riders generating interest from film production companies to reviewers in Asia trying to make sense of Goptri there is renewed interest in this odd little universe I’ve created. And, because God looks out for fools, drunks, and children – making me His favorite son, people discovering Goptri first are backtracking to get The Brittle Riders and some, but not all yet, are also starting to check out everything else I’ve written. That should keep them busy.

Oh, go ahead and click on those last two title links. They’re brief video teasers for each series. They have pretty music and easy to follow graphics.

Anyway, here’s a glimpse at what some new Goptri fans are saying.

There’s a horny squid and nukes. What more could I ask for?
– Mike BI never considered giving my spouse a year’s worth of meat for our anniversary.
– Linda HOkay, wow, did not see this villain coming. The evil unleashed is beyond daunting.
– Aariz MNo matter how much you’ll want to you can never look away from the mirror McCormick sticks in front of your mind.
– Tina U(McCormick’s) always been LGBTQIA+ friendly, but this subtly raises the bar and I, for one, am thrilled.
– Ashanti D

That’s enough for this week. Stay safe, sane, and hydrated. I like having you around.

Team McSciFi Keeps McBangin’

Well, it’s officially been ten days since Kim and I got McMarried. As is common with middle-aged couples, who collect AARP coupons, we’ve been enjoying carefree days of ziplining, parasailing, nude skydiving, and – obviously – zorbing. New readers are thinking “Sweet mother of the immortal possum, these folks have got it going on!” Everyone else knows I’m lying between what’s left of my teeth. Still, it’s nice being married even if it’s more “Netflix and chill” than “Getting tossed out of perfectly good planes.”

Okay, enough happiness. Onto the stuff that justifies my existence.

There are two cool things happening right now. One I can speak freely about and the other I need to keep three lawyers on speed dial while having a representative with a stun gun near me at all times. We’ll tackle the first one first.

Fans of the rollicking multiverse known as Legends Parallel will be thrilled to know that we are back in production. I have rewritten the script for Issue 4 and it is wending its way across the ocean blue into the hands of the legendary artist Leslie Tejlor where he will begin the arduous process of turning my scribblings into art. Since Leslie doesn’t speak much English, and I don’t speak any Hungarian, we have learned to use emojis, sample graphics, and we’ve even stooped so low as to use Google translate. Yet, somehow, we not only communicate, we get along quite well. Our safety net, his daughter who teaches English, has been removed from our arsenal as she got married and moved to Finland. Nevertheless, we seem to be doing okay.

You may have noticed the word “rewritten.” Back in the halcyon days of yore I wrote twelve issues which compiled a single story arc. The overall story will not change but a lot of things have happened since then. You may have heard about the pandemic and some low-key political stuff. While  (cool teaser video via the link) has taken most of it’s social commentary shots via allegories and metaphors, something that will not change, it would be foolish to ignore the world around us.

Also, while some people have micro-focused on the sexuality in the books, more than expected understood we were using boobs and dongles (yes, those are the Latin terms) as flash grenades to obfuscate the deeper messages. Simply stated, we wanted the gist of it all to sneak up on people and force them to go back and re-read everything to see what they’d missed. And, surprise, surprise, surprise, according to the reviews, it actually worked.

There is much to ponder here in terms of thought-provoking issues of race, sexuality, culture and society’s attitudes to history and relationships.

You want anthropological context and sociological commentary? This has jugs of it.

But, yeah… BOOBS.
– Zak Weber – Sci Fi Comics Nexus

Okay, onto the one I have to be veddy veddy, thanks to Elmer Fudd for the verbiage, careful with.

Back in January I spoke with one of those silly humans who makes money making movies. He thought there might be value in packaging The Brittle Riders (another cool video teaser via the link) to producers and seeing if any would like to have some fun and make this a movie or TV show or something cool like that. In an effort to keep it from feeling like Bill & Bob say so ergo it must be, we enlisted the help of a few other industry professionals, i.e. producers, writers, directors, etc., and sent them the Omnibus edition.

To understand how odd this was imagine a conversation that begins like this; “Hi, my name’s Bill and you don’t know me but I need you to read a thousand pages of my mental breakdown, write a critique, and get back to me in a couple of weeks.”

Against all odds they did just that. When the dust settled, and the reviews had been tabulated, they had given The Brittle Riders a 97.92% score, out of 100%, as far as its ability to be adapted into a film related project. The majority of films rated via this method land a little closer to 60%. Suffice it to say we paid heed.

And thus did our quest begin.

While finding enthusiastic professionals is a feel good moment, we needed to talk to someone who was used to tossing around a hundred million dollars, or so, at a project and finding out if they could justify moving this dystopian fun factory up a level or two. Long story short? Apparently this isn’t a bad idea.

A very unique tone and world, reminiscent of GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY meets a MAGNIFICIENT SEVEN/DIRTY DOZEN – type set up, but with a look, flavor, and lexicon all its own. In a world where studios and streamers are looking for IP that’s expansive, both narratively and in terms of ancillary possibilities (prequels, offshoots, video games, etc.), (The Brittle Riders) certainly seems to offer up a number of possibilities.

– Garrick Dion – 
Drive
Joker
Nightcrawler

All righty, time to pay attention.

While Garrick, I can call him by his first name as we’re basically BFFs – well, close enough for Hollywood, liked the project he hasn’t cut a check yet. However, just having his review changed everything. Suddenly people who couldn’t be bothered to hire me as an unpaid intern were intently interested in all things McSciFi (all sorts of cool video teasers via that link).

One company has even begun developing 3D renderings of the characters (sample graphic included below) to see if they can justify making an animated series out of it. While nothing is written in stone, hell – nothing’s even written in flowing sands at the moment, they have joined the slowly growing pantheon of companies that are showing an active interest in foisting The Brittle Riders on an unsuspecting populace.

Another thing that has happened is we’ve begun, with the help of people who know what the heck they’re doing, actively creating a treatment for a pilot. Since there is a pilot being considered that indicates a series can (SHOULD! GOSH DARNIT!) follow, it gives you an idea of where the focus is at the moment.

Given the fact that Black Adam took over a half a decade to get in the pipeline, and it had Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson behind every aspect of it, we have to be pleased with the progress we’ve been making, and we are.

There’s more coming, and I will update what I can when I can, but, until then, be fierce like the dino at the bottom of this message and stay safe and sane until we meet again.

We Got McMarried!

Next week we can talk about the business side of McSciFi. Today, I thought I’d share a glimpse into the personal part of my multiverse. On September 4, 2016, I agreed to meet a girl I’d met on Facebook and have a couple of drinks. I showed up and she was running a tad late. There were two birthday parties going on in the bar and, while I waited …. and waited ….. and waited …., each party would buy me a shot every time they bought a round. By the time Kim arrived two hours later I’d drank a fifth of Absolut and was lit like the Christmas tree in Daley Plaza.

Even so, I managed to splash my face with water, go outside to have a smoke, remind myself what consonants sounded like, and begin a conversation. The person she’d enjoyed online was still in there somewhere, buried under the rotting vestiges of what was left of my squishy brain. One thing led to several others and we finally agreed to take a break, maybe even thirty or forty cold showers, for a couple of weeks, and then get back together like functioning adults. That was on a Sunday.

By Tuesday she was back in my arms and we’ve been together ever since.

Like any relationship there have been good times and bad, easy moments and hard, but we supported each other through all of them, never doubting those decisions.

If you’d like to see the ceremony, just to prove I really did it, CLICK HERE to see the video our church streamed of the event. There will be professional images up next week and I will provide a link to them.

For now, JUST ENJOY THE VIDEO and know that you have our deepest gratitude for all the support you’ve given through the years. You are just as much a part of this as anyone.

Stay safe and sane and I’ll see you next week.

Taking Two McWeeks Off

This week finds me working with people who have people in an attempt to pretend I can be, in limited amounts, socially presentable. Despite this task being Sisyphean they seem determined to give it the old school try.

Next week finds me picking up a nice suit, doing a final run through of my vows, and topping it all off by marrying the woman I love. The good news is that she’s going to marry me right back so this won’t get awkward.

Hopefully.

Obviously, sales of all Merchandise and autographed items, including all comics, are on hold for a bit. All that cool stuff gets shipped out of my living room and, right now, ain’t no one got time for that.

Still, all is not lost.

You can get all the latest, and ginchiest, McSciFi gear. When you get to the page you will see a variety of images promoting McSciFi and various related titles. Once you click on one you will be given over one hundred and fifty different products you can have that image slapped on and shipped directly to your home. Not just the T-shirts, teddy bears, and such shown below, but coffee cups, mouse pads, pajamas, COVID face masks, phone cases, onesies for your toddler, and so much more it will make your little heart quiver in joy.

And there’s no reason not to festoon your bookshelves with copies of my novels as well as anthologies and magazines that contain my sacrifices to the gods of literature.

Should you want to wander through the radioactive remnants of my mind you have options. You can read through my archive of newsletters or give your earbuds a reason for existing and listen to all the episodes of The Big Wakeup Call hosted by Ryan Gatenby. Besides having me on from time to time, he also interviews celebrities and fascinating people you need to know about. He can even help you live out a vicarious fantasy or two as evidenced by his recent adventures while hanging out with the Sex Pistols.

Admit it, you wish you’d done that.

Thanks for all your support thus far and I look forward to having you join me as we go on more wacky adventures and share additional whimsical dystopian nightmares.

Stay safe and sane and I’ll see you soon.

Chillin Like a McVillain

As regular readers of this weekly missive know they are the coolest, most wonderful, humans in the known multiverse. Seriously, everything from amazing sex to gourmet food just falls in their laps no matter how awkward that may make any given situation when it happens.

“Um, gender neutral name, I can see you’re having amazing sex and there’s a bowl of Bouillabaisse, with fresh caught Monkfish, waiting for you, but could we please get back to your PowerPoint on Tertiary Markets and their spiritual impact on plaids made with pastels?”

These things happen to my readers all the time.

That being stipulated, it is then incumbent on me to give them stuff to read each week. And, to that end, I am about to disappoint.

Between prepping for my impending wedding in less than three weeks, working with the nice people behind the scenes who insist I pay attention to their every word, editing two projects at one time, helping Sci-Fi Lampoon find a real publicist to replace the newt who currently eats their bugs and poops on its rock but is of limited use otherwise (reply to this if you might be interested in not getting paid for a great cause), and trying to be a functioning adult at least two hours a day, I haven’t done anything I can share.

I’m sorry.

The best I can do is point everyone to my video promo page and hope it gets enjoyed.

Unlike the videos on my regular web pages, which are designed to sell books and spell out basic plot points, these are specifically designed to get business people to ask questions. Hopefully about the projects, but I guess worrying about my mental health is acceptable too. I tend to get that a lot.

So, have fun on my video promo page, it was updated as recently as yesterday, make sure to have the volume up since there’s some cool (cleared and credited) music there, and stay safe until next time.

Taking it Eezy McPeezy

A good friend once said, “You can tell it’s a pro project when absolutely nothing’s going on and you’re busy as hell.” That sums up my situation nicely. As to the “nothing” end of the equation; no one’s cutting checks, no one’s flying me to some exotic locale to interview wannabe Kardashians, in fact no one’s even set up a ZOOM meeting to discuss any of those things.

However, the people who can make those things happen, usually without Kardashians, and have proven track records doing so for others, have been taking up a ton of my time. And that’s okay. Because the one thing they all have in common is that they’re trying to make me better, to make my work more presentable, to make me successful in every nuance of the term.

Long story short, as cool as all that is, there’s not much I can share today.

But I can share some entertaining videos with you. Although that almost wasn’t so.

Fun was had by all when we realized that many mobile providers had recently changed their security protocols. Happy pop up videos, like mine, are now considered a nuisance. In those rare cases they popped up at all they were tiny, wiped out the main screen so the viewer was stuck with no way back, and looked like absolute doggy doo.

That was not good.

Thanks to the hackers over at ANTLUR we got around that and now have beautiful pop ups you can view on any device.

I kid. They’re not hackers. They’re just really smart and know what the hell they’re doing. I am their competency counterpoint when it comes to things like this.

Anyway, due to their kind assistance, you can CLICK HERE and see the latest promos I am attached to. Each is around a minute, or less, in length and each is completely different thematically from the others.

The idea is to whet the interest of those who shant be named – to be more accurate, simply can’t at this early point – and give our people behind the scenes some useful tools.

Yes, I have people now.

Until next week, I hope you enjoy the videos and ask you to stay safe, sane, and healthy.

McSharing is McCaring and McCaring is Good

You woke up this morning, nuked a cup of leftover coffee that tasted like an angry cross between rust and stale blood, opened up your computer to check your emails, saw me paraphrasing the Care Bears, and figured “Yep, the apocalypse is happening. May as well quit my job.”

Before you do anything Rash (go ahead and click, you’ll like it), please be advised that I am suffering from momentary whimsy. This condition is theoretically curable and I am working with professionals to get it under control. However, until then, now seems like a good time to correct a grievous oversight.

It was brought to my attention by a nice human (HOWDY BLAIR! SAY HI TO THE KIDS!) who stumbled across my social media posts that, while there are thousands of you on this email list, not everyone, not even Blair, follows me everywhere. I guess I can understand that. I wouldn’t want you to overdose on McSciFi.

What Blair specifically stumbled across were a selection of short videos being used to promote my various projects.

Here’s where things get a little complicated. While embedding the videos so you could click on a nifty thumbnail and watch in your email browser would be the most convenient thing to do, many email services mark embedded videos as a risk. But I also know how much people like looking at pretty pictures. So, I’m going to compromise. When you click on the little title cards below you will be taken to the video in a new tab. That keeps your security programs happy while you to get to check out all the coo-coo coolness that’s been getting shared.

Most videos are under a minute so you need not worry about being trapped in a podcast or anything. Also, all are being used for social media promotions so they are perfectly safe for work.

Okay, here we go.

Legends Parallel burst on the scene in 2016 to rave reviews and quickly developed a rabid fan base. Life, COVID, and stuff, got in the way and forced the title to go on hiatus. Now, times are different and the team is getting back together to bring you more socially conscious, mind bending, action. And, yes, there will be boobs. No need to worry there.

Hybrid Zero seeped into the public’s psyche in 2010. As it garnered more attention its creator, Cyril Brown, decided to expand his multiverse by bringing me in to write stories and develop the existing ones into something larger. Trust me when I say that’s easier said than done. But it was worth every second. Books started coming out, fans started knocking people over to get their copies (this happened in public – more than once), and things began looking a lot like unicorns bathing in rainbows. Unfortunately, just as with Legends Parallel, the real world intruded and made everyone wear a frowny face. But sad doesn’t equal dead. New titles are in the penciling stage and will be headed your way before you realize your boss thought the phrase was “dining al Fresca” and wondering why people were so devoted to a weird soft drink.

Regular readers already know that Azoth Khem Publishing has kicked things up a notch. SPLICE: HIT BIT TECHNOLOGY was voted best science fiction novel of 2020 by the Critters Readers Poll and then went on to earn a stellar rating from, the world’s #1 source for book evaluations, Kirkus Reviews. That review is being used to position the title for sale in libraries, major brick and mortar locations, and set up foreign licensing. Meanwhile, The Brittle Riders has begun the slow process of being shopped to visual media production companies. Each step accomplished has led to the next, and that’s all anyone can ask at this point.

Not to sit on my ample laurels (although I am trying to lose weight), I have been picking up new projects, working on finishing the final chapter of Goptri of the Mists, kicking short stories off my computer and into anthologies, and trying to keep Kim sane as we get closer to our wedding date.

That’s enough for now. Until next week please stay safe, sane, and neck deep in happiness.

Talkin’ McComics

Have you been frantically scouring the interwebs wondering what I look like without a hobo-esque goatee? Has your life crumbled as you worried how I might look if I started shedding pandemic pounds? Does your boss wear a frowny face when they hear you fretting about the possible fates of McSciFi? Do family members ask if I’ve succumbed to the color bleen? Well, fret not, gentle reader. Just like that time I worked as an exotic dancer, all will be revealed. CLICK HERE to watch Episode 32 of IN YOUR FACE hosted by KingDaniel Taylor. As you may have guessed, I am the guest. My apologies for the homophone. The “homo-” root means “same,” and the “-phone” root means “sound.” Homophones are words that sound the same. Get your mind out of the gutter.

Since we spent the entire episode discussing comic books I’m involved in, today seems like a good day to discuss comic books some more. Like all indies these days I spent the last part of the interview giving shout outs to other indies for reason or reasons unknown. I’m kidding, obviously, I like them and each is an inspiration in their own way. If you don’t have time to listen to the whole thing at least take a moment to check out the amazing worlds of Rik Ty and Christie Shinn. Ahh, who am I kidding? Check out the coolest indie creators in the multiverse at the Independent Creators Connection, home of ICC Magazine.

There are many more (HI ZEE!) I could have mentioned but my brain can only brain so much during a live interview before I start drooling on myself and muttering in Esperanto.

Okay, back to the wonderful world of McSciFi.

The lovely and talented, I’ve decided to start using that dismissive trope for all genders now, Cyril Brown (he of the wildly NSFW website) and I have gotten the band back together and are diving into the deep end of the Hybrid Zero multiverse.

When working with Cyril you can spend an inordinate amount of time deciding which layer of the multiverse you want to focus on, how ‘porny’ you want it to be (there will always be a little), and then, just for fun, maybe come up with a plot so the characters have reasons to interact and speak.

This is not as easy as it might seem.

Nevertheless, despite the complete lack of human sacrifices and ribald orgies, we agreed to start work on The Neutrinos; the Multiverse’s first, all silent, NC-17 rock opera.

The story follows an all female group of rock musicians, and their cybernetic manager, as they traverse space, but not time, trying to make some cash and have some fun. Also, because this is rock and roll, prodigious amounts of beer will be consumed. The fact their live shows will lead to societal upheaval, and the fall of the occasional empire, is just part and parcel of who they are.

Now, this is where my world gets fun. Every single title in the Hybrid Zero multiverse has to, eventually, relate to every other title. That means that the fun time family of soldier/assassins in Juggernaut, has to tie in with the dino-laden soft core world of Jungle Grrl and both of them will have to blend in with the gonzo alternate reality of Cassandra and the Changeling Sword. None of this includes the stuff lurking in Cyril’s TBD drawer.

While all of this is going on I’m updating the scripts and stories for Legends Parallel, tweaking Bob: Sins of the Son to eliminate any references that have dated out, and working assiduously to finally get Pestilent to see the light of day. The latter almost seemed to be cursed. But, now, I see it was like that dream date back in the day. It simply wasn’t ready. Now it is.

Now to deal with the one question that keeps popping up; “Why don’t (I) shop the comics for film adaptations like (I’m) doing with my novels?”

The simple answer is there’s not enough content. While novels create stories with defined beginnings, middles, and ends, comics tend to be fashioning complete universes and need to provide motion picture creators a wealth of material for them to make sense of it on the big screen, or streaming platform, or whatever. No matter the final venue, they need a ton of stuff.

Okay, that should bring you up to date on the stuff I’m allowed to bring you up to date on. Until next week I wish you peace and happiness.

Talking McFilms

As more and more stuff is happening behind the scenes this will be the last time we chat about film progress for a while. The last thing I want to do is betray a trust and leak information before it’s officially confirmed. And that is easy to do. One minute you’re chatting offline and think “Gosh, I bet humans would love to know this” and the next thing you know you’re getting angry calls from lawyers and you’ve screwed the pooch. As my therapist likes to say “Pooch screwing is not allowed. Now, get back to work.”

One big thing we all are dealing with is the many issues in the supply chain. While major publishers can absorb the hit, and it’s not tiny, indies are scrambling. No one wants to increase their wholesale costs but that means many companies, just like the ones who sign me, are looking for ways to reduce their profits without ending up in the red on every sale or being forced to double retail costs. It’s a delicate dance but everyone is pulling together to make it work.

One blessing is that not everything has to be done immediately. Just as it took three months to get that amazing Kirkus Review for SPLICE: HIT BIT TECHNOLOGY, it takes about the same amount of time to roll out a promotion that will be seen by libraries, distributors and independent book stores around the country. It’s not like sending your Aunt Martha an invite to the weekend Bar-B-Q. There are a few more hoops to jump through first.

Even so, the nice people at ©Watchdog Entertainment® and Azoth Khem Publishing are working closely with the nice people at Kirkus Reviews to get SPLICE: HIT BIT TECHNOLOGY out to the masses. Which seems like a good idea since readers everywhere are just crazy about this book. Even readers in India (readers_judge graphic below) are raving about it. In other words, getting more readers seems like a magnificent idea.

It also doesn’t hurt that the increasing positives are all happening while ©Watchdog Entertainment® is beginning to develop the feature film. Timing is everything.

In other film news, we have begun the arduous – sorry, I mean “whiz bang golly wolly fun” – process of creating a film treatment for the The Brittle Riders’ pilot. It’s not as simple as copying scenes from the book into a template or anything like that. Due to the fact I’m a jerk – sorry, I mean “terse writer” – brief scenes in the book could end up eating minutes worth of screen time. Since each minute of screen time is more sacred than sperm is to Monty Python it requires an attention to detail at a level I’m not normally noted for. Grand epic stories that bend brains? Yeah, cool, they’re my jam. Figuring out which shade of white should be on the third wall in the eleventh room? Not my strong suit.

Still, like SPLICE: HIT BIT TECHNOLOGY, fans tend to gush when they talk about The Brittle Riders. And it’s not just fans. A collection of film critics gave The Brittle Riders a 97.92% adaptability score out of a possible score of 100%. That ranks higher than several major films which were recently made. Additionally, major film producers, like  (graphic below), have had wonderful things to say and haven’t been shy about sharing them. Simply put, this project has legs and it’s starting to walk on its own.

All in all, we’re in a happy place.

Speaking of happy places, I’d like to wish a Happy 9th Birthday to the Independent Creators Connection, home of ICC Magazine, the wonderful place that has honored me by letting me be their Assistant Editor for these last four years.

I’ll have some comic book news for you next week. Maybe some other stuff as well. Until then, stay safe and sane.

Brittle Riders & SPLICE Getting Big McLovin’!

It didn’t take a clinical psychologist to figure out I was a little down in the dumps last week. No one had done anything wrong, no one had ruined my career, no one had been mean to me or even all that unreasonable. I asked a bunch of companies to pony up millions upon millions of dollars to make my dystopian nightmare come to life and they asked me to provide them a clear look at my vision. Basically, poop or get off the pot.

Unfortunately, the specific poopage they seemed to require would use more resources than little old us happened to have available.

The thing is, just like there are many ways to skin a cat – please don’t skin any cats – it turns out there are also many ways to successfully poop. Neither I nor my publisher knew these mystical ways, this is rare air for us, but people who bring home seven figure salaries from making movies took time to share some basic ones that had worked for them and others. In essence it all boiled down to one thing: shore up our business team.

To that end, allow me to introduce you to Leeaura Lee and Susan Dunaway. They are not here to expand my social media presence or entice barely legal teens ogle my form. Although the former may be a byproduct, the latter is completely useless to a guy who already wakes up next to the cutest patootie in the multiverse.

Instead, they will be honing my various and sundry presentations down to a single topic each and culling anything that doesn’t enhance the whole. I have tried doing this in the past and …. SQUIRREL!

Their efforts should result in some interviews for me but, more importantly, will allow them to do some adulting and meet with venture capitalists and give us a chance to grow my many terrifying beasts into a money making chimera filled petting zoo.

One of the first tools they can use is being able to share the thoughts of respected film and television producers with interested parties.

For example, this is what , co-executive producer of CAPONE, had to say about The Brittle Riders in his review to our agents.

“A very unique tone and world, reminiscent of GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY meets a MAGNIFICIENT SEVEN/DIRTY DOZEN-type set up, but with a look, flavor, and lexicon all its own. In a world where studios and streamers are looking for IP that’s expansive, both narratively and in terms of ancillary possibilities (prequels, offshoots, video games, etc.), (The Brittle Riders) certainly seems to offer up a number of possibilities.

BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!

The world’s favorite tale of a wayward teen who grows up to become its most feared super villain, SPLICE: HIT BIT TECHNOLOGY, just got the most important review in its short life.

Kirkus Reviews has been the industry standard for almost one hundred years. Keeping things simple, the lack of a positive Kirkus Review means no distribution to libraries, major chains, and most mom and pop bookstores. They are a trusted source that reviews new releases and tells people whether or not they should spend their hard earned money on them. Given the whelming number of new releases from indie and mainstream publishers, that has become more important than ever. Just because someone’s grandma said something nice on Amazon doesn’t mean distributors should lay out thousands of dollars to stock shelves with a book nation wide.

SPLICE earned a “recommended” rating. On the Kirkus pyramid, that is a pretty darn good place to be. First a book needs to get a positive review of any sort. The majority don’t.

Then, if that hurdle is cleared, books become accepted, recommended, or starred.

The majority get the first rating (which is an impressive feat on its own), a slim number get recommended (which is where SPLICE is), and a rare few get a star. For our first time even trying I’ll take this happily. So what did Kirkus say?

“McCormick offers a blood-soaked tale of upward mobility … An engaging dark comedy rife with retribution.” – Kirkus Reviews.

Click the link to read the whole, absolutely wonderful, thing.

There’s more burbling beneath the surface, and I will share what I can when I can but, until then, stay safe and sane. I’ve grown fond of most of you.