Brandon Nankivell's Blog, page 3

What Being Out In Nature Feels Like

Oh boy…

Just wow.

Shikes.

Whoopy doodle doodum.

The clouds up there.

Sheesh-ka-peesh.

It’s rather nice to be out here.

Birds twitterin’.

Spreadin’ there wings.

Ahh…

Just look at this marvel.

Who the hell did this?

Christ.

*Inhale…*

*Exhale…*

Trees just bein’ trees.

Ants and stuff crawling around.

Marching!

Marching for the eats!

For the colony!

I’m lucky to be out here.

The air is crisp.

It’s a massage against my skin.

This is home.

Green!

Much green!

Squawk! Squawk!

Get out of our bloody territory!

Squawk! Squawk!

Yeah no worries, this is your home after all!

Water.

Be like water my friend.

*water noises*

Awe.

Relax.

Sittin’ here.

Yes.

Mmmm.

Mm.

…

…

…

…

.

What Unconditional Love Feels Like

It feels like no words can convey it.

It feels like there’s nothing more to achieve.

It feels like I’m complete.

It feels like warm toast on a cold winter night.

It feels like purity.

It feels like… … …

It feels like this is it.

It feels like Ahhhhh… This!

It feels like the sharing of it is set to auto-pilot and that’s completely okay.

It feels like there’s no more longing for sex, junk food, video games, pornography, ciggies, alcohol, weed — you name it.

It feels like a warm glow.

It feels like the natural way of being.

It feels like sunlight massaging me.

It feels truly unconditional — no matter who they are, where they are from, or what they have done — the love is to be shared with them.

It feels continuous.

It feels soft.

It feels expansive.

It feels like it depends on nothing.

It feels like rainbows.

It feels like poetry.

It feels like a song.

It feels choiceless.

It feels devoid of logic.

It feels effortless.

It feels like heaven on earth.

The Rational Male Preventive Medicine Summary (Rollo Tomassi)

https://medium.com/media/0b2b484cdbe82dd8c3231949945ab247/href

You think things are going well with your woman, then out of nowhere she says, “We need to end this”.

Maybe you’ve tried getting your woman back with no success and you are not sure why.

You need to understand that at different ages and phases of life, women respond differently to what they find attractive and how they will behave with you.

A 33-year-old woman will want you to show her you are willing to commit and provide whereas an 18-year-old is likely to place more importance on looks, and exploring her options.

In this video you will gain an understanding of the phases of a woman’s life, you will gain more power over your dating life, waste less time, and become better at attracting and keeping your dream women or woman.

This is a book summary of The Rational Male: Preventative Medicine by Rollo Tomassi.

Part 1 — Understanding Hypergamy

Hypergamy is the instinctual desire of a woman to get the best possible mate that she can get.

Hypergamy is made up of the good genes aspect and the good father aspect. Women want the most genetically attractive partner they can get.

The second is the good father aspect. They also want a man who sticks around and has resources to share with her and her children.

But rarely do these characteristics appear in the same man.

Men who are good looking and can sleep with a lot of women don’t have the incentive to stick around while men who are willing to provide aren’t necessarily attractive.

Men with both of these qualities are rare.

Therefore some researchers have suggested women have evolved a dualistic sexual strategy.

Over evolutionary time, women may have maximized reproductive success by doing two things simultaneously: seeking good genes by mating with someone other than her primary partner during ovulation; and maintaining a long-term pair bond with a partner who provides resources for the children.

In simple terms, she coups up with Winston, but bangs Chad.

Keep watching because at the end of part 3, you will learn how to help prevent your woman from banging Chad.

But first you must understand…

Part 2 — Biological HypergamyThe Ovulatory Shift

There is a multitude of scientific studies that indicate that a woman’s sexual preference for facial characteristics shifts depending on her menstrual phase.

When women ovulate, they prefer masculine faces — faces with features that indicate high levels of testosterone like wide faces, beards and defined jawlines.

Men with high levels of testosterone indicate good genes because only men with good genes could afford the taxing effects testosterone has on the immune system.

And fun fact: High rates of testosterone are associated with high rates of offspring abandonment.

At other points during the cycle, women prefer feminene male faces, as they might signal a higher willingness of the males to invest in offspring.

What Does This Mean For Men?

So now that we know about hypergamy and that women desire the best genes during ovulation, ask yourself: How would this affect your relationship with your partner?

Can you accept the fact that she has an instinctual desire to trade up with a good looking alpha male during ovulation?

If this makes you uncomfortable, embrace the discomfort. Know that in theory, no woman who sees you as her Hypergamous best interest will want to ‘cheat’ on you.

That’s why it’s important to never stop becoming one percent better.

The trap so many men fall into is they get into a relationship.

After a few months they stop going to the gym. They become lazy. And delude themselves that their woman will love them forever for who they are.

Let’s move on to part 3, where you’ll learn the phases of a woman’s life which will help you identify a partner who is less likely to bang Chad.

Part 3 — Women’s Maturation Timeline

Describes how the situations and behaviors of women change based on what phase of life they’re in. The first phase is…

Phase 1: The Formative Years (Ages 15 to 25)

Women aged 15 to 25 highly value the looks of men.

An introverted shy guy can be perceived as an attractive alpha male if his looks are on point.

Other factors like status, confidence, and game while beneficial, are valued less due to the fact that a young girl lacks real experience of a guy with game, social savvy, or a real need for provisioning.

Phase 2: The Break (End of Late Teens)

At the start of women’s college lives, they are inclined to end their relationship with their high school sweetheart and enjoy their newfound options because their sexual market value is at its highest.

A common trap men fall into during this phase is committing to a long-distance relationship with their woman because they or their partner have to move away for university.

That or they change their careers so that they can attend the same university as their woman, only to be broken up with after a few months because she is inclined to explore her options.

Phase 3: The Party Years (Ages 20 to 25)

In this phase, women have boat loads of sexual options.

The physical looks she prioritized in high school will remain the top attraction priority; however as she matures and gains new experiences, wealth and status will also become important factors for attraction.

Phase 4: The Epiphany (Ages 28 to 30)

Women become more aware of their declining looks and their diminishing ability to compete with younger women.

They feel more urgency to lock in a male partner with superior genes who will also stick around to provide.

“Where is this going?” Is the most common question a man will be asked during this phase.

She might stop having sex with you or threaten to breakup if she doesn’t feel that you would get down on one knee for her.

Phase 5: The Transitory Phase (Ages 29 to 31)

She is anxious that she will never find a suitable long-term mate.

Feminine social conventions allay women’s anxieties and pressure men to settle down with them. That’s why you hear some women say:

“Men should date women their age.”“Men are shallow for ignoring single mothers”“Men feel threatened by successful women.”Phase 6: Security (Ages 31 to 34)

If women have not secured a suitable partner they have two options: continue to look for a partner that fulfills both alpha attraction and beta provisioning as their looks decline further, or, settle for a partner with less value than her who can’t provide alpha genes but can provide long term security and provisioning.

As women continue to age in their thirties: wealth, provisioning capacity and status become the primary attractive traits to them.

Women in this phase are the toughest to date because of the heavy desire for you to commit and entitlement.

“I’m more valuable than those younger girls!” she tells herself. A mixture of feminism, her achievements, and fear of losing her value manifests as entitlement.

Men are repelled, and the high value ones are dating the younger girls so she is left with little options.

Phase 7: Redevelopment (Ages 40 to 48)

A new alpha re-interest begins to emerge. While security may still be an important concern, she turns her attention to the ‘excitement’ she used to enjoy with her past alpha lovers.

Phase 8: Late Phase Security (Ages 48+)

Her primary desire is security and provisioning as her appearance decays.

Outro

Now as promised — To decrease the likelihood of your woman banging Chad, you have 2 main options:

1. Ditch her and date a woman aged 28–34 and 48+ because they’ll be in a phase where they value long-term beta provisioning more than short-term alpha fun. The obvious drawback is that you may settle for a woman whose youthful beauty is declining quickly. Not to mention breaking up with her could be a poor choice if you are implementing option 2, which is…

2. Commit to becoming one percent better every day so you can increase and maintain high value. High value and consistently bringing excitement into her life will encourage her, or even them, to stick around for you.

The ideas I shared with you from this book are Rollo’s observations based on over 15 years of discussion of thousands of men’s experiences. But Rollo still encourages you to seek truth for yourself.

“With a healthy understanding, respect, and awareness of what influences his condition, a man can overcome and thrive within the context of them — but he must first be aware of, and accepting of, the conditions in which he operates and maneuvers. You may not be able to control the actions of others, you may not be able to account for women’s Hypergamy, but you can be prepared for them, you can protect yourself from the consequences of them and you can live a better life no matter your demographic, age, past regrets or present circumstances.” — Rollo Tomassi

Recap

Let’s recap.

In part 1 you learned that hypergamy is the instinctual desire for a woman to get the best possible mate that she can get.

In part 2 you learned that a woman during ovulation is likely to find alpha male traits more attractive than beta male traits.

In part 3 you learned the different phases of a woman’s life and how it affects their behavior and preferences in a mate.

Sleep Smarter Summary 21 Essential Strategies by Shawn Stevenson

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NlXyYZtW3PQ

Even the richest man in the world says he focuses on getting great sleep because it helps him to do one thing that helps make him wealthy.

I will share that one thing with you later in this summary, but first, understand that better sleep will help you to…

Look more attractiveImprove your moodBurn more fatBuild more muscleImprove your ability to focus

This is a book summary of Sleep Smarter by Shawn Stevenson.

1. Know The Value Of Sleep

In addition to the benefits of sleep I just mentioned, it strengthens your immune system, balances hormones, increases metabolism, boosts physical energy, and improves brain function.

2. Get More Sunlight During The Day

Morning light signals your hypothalamus to wake up. It also regulates your natural body clock and promotes a healthy secretion of melatonin which helps you fall asleep at the right time.

Sunlight is best absorbed between 6:00am and 8:30am. 90 minutes of direct sunlight is optimal.

3. Avoid Screens Before Bedtime

Blue light from electronic screens causes your body to produce more daytime hormones like cortisol and it suppresses melatonin production.

Turn off the screens at least 90 minutes before bed.

At the very least, install f.lux on your mobile device or wear blue-light blocking glasses.

4. Have A Caffeine Curfew

Adenosine is a chemical that builds up in your body throughout the day. When enough has built up, it causes you to be tired, signalling you to go to sleep.

But caffeine blocks adenosine build up and so you are tricked into staying awake longer when your body is actually begging you to sleep. Caffeine is also a nervous system stimulant so avoid having it after 2:00pm.

5. Be Cool

When it’s time for your body to rest, your core body temperature drops to help initiate sleep.

If your bedroom is too hot or cold, it can cause sleeping difficulties. Studies have found that between 60 and 68 degrees Fahrenheit is ideal.

6. Get To Bed At The Right Time

For most people, you get the highest quality sleep between 10:00pm and 2:00am. This is because it aligns with the natural rhythms of your body and nature.

Around 10:00pm, internal metabolic energy is increased to repair, strengthen, and rejuvenate your body when you’re asleep.

But if you’re awake when this is happening, you may experience a “second wind” of energy and find it difficult to sleep.

7. Rub Magnesium Into Your Skin Each Day

80% of the population in the US is deficient in magnesium, an anti-stress mineral that serves countless important functions. Research shows that a large amount of magnesium in supplements is lost in the digestive process, so use an oil to rub it into your skin for maximum absorption.

8. Create a Sleep Sanctuary

Your bedroom should only be for sleep and sex. Do not work in your bed, otherwise your brain associates your sleeping space with work and your mind will have difficulty relaxing.

Open a window or use an air purifier to ensure the air your breathing is negatively charged.

Invest in one house-plant to improve air quality in your home. Even the sheer sight and smell of plants promote calmness and encourage healthy sleeping patterns.

9. Orgasm

You release serotonin and oxytocin during orgasm which help reduce stress and therefore help you sleep better.

Prolactin is also released and animals injected with it become tired immediately. Men produce 4x more prolactin with having an orgasm through intercouse instead of masturbation.

10. Black Out Your Bedroom

Your skin has light receptors. Picking up light through your skin can interfere with your sleep. Cover up lights from electronics and alarm clocks.

Use blackout curtains to block artificial light beaming through your windows like the lasers that come out of Sam Oven’s eyes.

11. Exercise In The Morning

Cortisol spikes in the morning for the purpose of encouraging you to exercise. Your body isn’t designed to exercise too close to bedtime.

A study showed that people who exercised at 7:00am instead of 1:00pm or 7:00pm slept longer and had up to 75% more deep sleep.

Stevenson also suggests lifting weights instead of running, because lifting triggers your body to release anabolic hormones that help you sleep better.

12. Keep Electronics Out of Your Bedroom

A study found that using cell phones before bed caused people to take longer to reach deep stages of sleep and they spent less time in deep sleep.

Phones emit EMF’s which can disrupt your sleep.

The World Health Organization has classified cell phone radiation as a Class B carcinogen.

If you can’t remove the phone altogether, at least put your phone into airplane mode at night to prevent the electro magnetic demons of the underworld from eating you alive.

13. Lose Body Fat

Being overweight puts stress on your organs, nervous system, and disrupts your body’s hormonal system.

You produce more of the stress hormone cortisol that wreaks havoc on your sleep.

And the worse your sleep gets, the more weight you gain. It’s a vicious cycle.

Stevenson suggests you eat more protein and fats than carbs so you can tap into a fat-burning state.

14. Go Easy On The Alcohol

Alcohol disrupts the super restorative REM sleep. That’s why you feel like crap in the morning.

It may also cause you to wake up in the night and urinate which messes your sleep cycle up.

If you want restorative sleep, stop drinking a few hours before bed.

15. Sleep In The Ideal Position For You

Your sleep position affects numerous things. Most people prefer to sleep on their side. Move your shoulder slightly forward so it’s not directly under you and don’t have your head propped too high on your pillow.

Sleeping on your stomach or back may help if you have sleep apnea but be sure to do your own research.

16. Meditate

Meditation in the morning has been proven to help test subjects sleep better at night, let alone all the other benefits like lowering stress and reducing inflammation.

17. Use Smart Supplementation

Make lifestyle changes before you even think about supplements. The natural herbs Stevenson recommends are Chamomile, kava kava, valerian.

Others he suggests are 5-HTP, GABA, and L-Tryptophan but you will have to do your own testing to see what works for you.

Now as promised at the beginning of this video, the number one thing that Jeff Bezos says he gets from a great sleep, his improved decision-making ability.

He says that his job is to make just 3 high quality decisions per day, and he’s not going to be able to do that with poor sleep.

18. Be Early To Rise

Research published in the Journal of Applied Social Psychology showed that early birds are more proactive than evening people, and they tend to do great in business.

It also showed that early birds anticipate problems better and minimize them more effectively which Stevenson argues is a huge leverage point in business today.

19. Wear Light & Comfortable Clothing To Bed

Don’t wear more than you need to and don’t go crazy with covers and electric blankets.

Wearing comfortable PJ’s not only acts as a psychological trigger to tell you it’s time to sleep, but it also has to do with regulating your body temperature.

20. Get Grounded

Research is growing that shows the benefits of earth’s electromagnetic energy. Making direct contact with the earth’s surface grounds your body and allows negatively charged antioxidant electrons to enter your body and neutralize positively charged free radicals at sites of inflammation.

Walk on grass during the day or sleep on a grounding mat to reap the benefits.

21. Follow an Evening RoutineSummary

Let’s recap.

Today you learned 21 ways to optimize your sleep including…

1. Know The Value Of Sleep

2. Get More Sunlight During The Day

3. Avoid Screens Before Bedtime

4. Have A Caffeine Curfew

6. Get To Bed At The Right Time

7. Rub Magnesium Into Your Skin Each Day

8. Create a Sleep Sanctuary

10. Black Out Your Bedroom

11. Exercise In The Morning

12. Keep Electronics Out of Your Bedroom

14. Go Easy On The Alcohol

15. Sleep In The Ideal Position For You

17. Use Smart Supplementation

19. Wear Light & Comfortable Clothing To Bed

21. Follow an Evening Routine

There you have it!

Be sure to check out animated book summaries on our YouTube channel One Percent Better!

Click to watch our animated sleep smarter summary

Originally published at https://onepercentacademy.com .

13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do Summary

https://medium.com/media/6cccaf9e9ad210c936bce68c26154af4/href

Imagine you are out one day doing your normal routine when suddenly you get a call. Your best friend died in a tragic car accident.

How would you cope with having your life permanently changed in the blink of an eye?

Give this summary your focused attention for the next 10 minutes so you can become a more resilient person who can handle life’s tragedies.

This is a book summary of 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do by the psychotherapist Amy Morin.

Thing I: Don’t Waste Time Feeling Sorry For Yourself

Imagine you break both your legs. You hop on the wheelchair and contemplate that you will be in this wheelchair for the rest of your life.

How would you react?

Why We Feel Sorry For Ourselves

The reason people feel sorry for themselves when they find they’re in a bad situation is because they are procrastinating.

They do not want to face life’s struggles, they choose to believe that they don’t have control over their circumstances and they play the victim card.

The Problem With Feeling Sorry For Yourself

1. It’s a waste of time.

2. It leads to more negative emotions.

3. It causes you to overlook the good in your life

To reduce feelings of self-pity, you need to change your behavior.

How To Stop Feeling Sorry For Yourself

1. Volunteer to help a worthy cause. It’s hard to feel sorry for yourself when you’re serving hungry people in a soup kitchen or spending time with elderly residents in a nursing home.

2. Exchange Self-Pity For Gratitude. Gratitude not only impacts your psychological health, but it can also affect your physical health.

A study found: People who feel gratitude don’t get sick as often as others. They have lower blood pressure and better immune systems (1).

Thing II: Don’t Give Away Your Power

Think about someone you dislike.

How much time do you think about how much you dislike them? How much power do these people have over your mental energy?

Giving other people the power to control how you think, feel, and behave makes it impossible to be mentally strong.

Problems With Giving Away Your Power:

Not setting clear boundaries causes you to give away your power. Giving away your power makes…

1. You depend on others to regulate your feelings.

2. You let others define your self-worth.

3. You become sensitive to criticism.

How To Take Back Your Power

1. Forgive People Who Have Taken Your Power

2. Think Before You React

If you tend to react negatively, take deep breaths and excuse yourself from the situation.

3. Evaluate Feedback Critically

Ask yourself, what evidence is there that this is true? Why might this person be giving me this feedback?

One person’s opinion of you doesn’t make it true.

Thing III: Don’t Shy Away From Change

How well do you accept change? Are you able to change your habits, environment, or behavior when the need arises?

Or will you stick to the same old routines because it feels familiar even if it was bad for you?

Why You Shy Away From Good Change

You tend to justify a bad habit by convincing yourself what you’re doing isn’t “that bad”.

When you’re in a bad situation, you worry that making a change might make things worse.

The Problem With Shying Away From Change

1. You won’t learn new things

2. The longer you wait the harder it will get.

How To Not Shy Away From Change

Identify The Pros And Cons Of Changing

Create a list about the potentially good and bad outcomes of making a change.

Thing IV: Don’t Focus On Things You Can’t ControlWhy We Try To Control Everything

Trying to control everything starts as a way to manage anxiety. If you know you have everything under control, what’s there to worry about?

The Problem With Wasting Energy On Things You Can’t Control

1. You’ll unnecessarily blame yourself for everything.

2. Being a control freak damages relationships.

How To Focus On Things You Can Control

Recognize what you can control. Remember that the only thing you can control is your behavior and attitude.

Thing V: Don’t Worry About Pleasing Everyone

Do you say yes to nearly everything people ask of you?

Why We Try To Please People

1. Fear

People pleasers are afraid of conflict, therefore they try to avoid it by trying to make everyone happy.

2. Learned Behaviour

Sometimes the desire to avoid conflict stems from childhood. If you were raised by parents who were constantly arguing, you may have learned that conflict is bad and keeping people happy is the best way to prevent arguments.

The Problem With People Pleasing

1. It Damages The Relationships With People Close To You

Imagine your friend asked you to go out for the day to watch a movie or play golf but if you do that your spouse will get angry because you two already made plans. In situations like these people-pleasers will sacrifice the relationship with the people closest to them to please others.

2. You Lose Sight Of Your Values

You will stop doing what’s right and only focus on making people happy whether it’s good or bad.

How To Stop Pleasing Everyone

Determine Who You Want To Please

It’s not your job to keep everyone happy, just focus on the people you are closest to and devote your time to making them happy.

Thing VI: Don’t Fear Taking Calculated RisksWhy We Avoid Taking Risks

1. Emotion Prevails Over Logic

2. We Don’t Think About Risks

Instead, we base our decisions on emotions or habits. Think back to a time when you made an impulsive decision.

For example buying something expensive you don’t need or sending an embarrassing text to that woman you were obsessing over.

In times like these we need to restrain ourselves from making impulsive decisions. Give yourself time to think about the decision.

Sleep on it.

If it’s an important decision give yourself a week to think things through.

The Problem With Fearing RiskYou Won’t Be Extraordinary Without Taking Calculated Risks

If we don’t take risks we are likely missing out on great opportunities.

How To Reduce Fear

Balance Emotion With Logic

Many passengers are so afraid of flying they choose to drive long distances to get to a destination. Their decision to drive is based on emotion, not logic. There is only 1 in an 11 million chance that you will die in an airplane crash however there is 1 in a 5000 chance that you will die in a car crash over the same distance.

If you’re going to take a risk, wouldn’t you want the odds in your favor?

Thing VII: Don’t Dwell On The Past

Do you think about all the things you “should have” done differently? Thinking about the past won’t fix your problems.

Why We Dwell On The Past

Guilt, shame, and anger are just a few of the feelings that can keep you stuck in the past. You might think…

“If I stay miserable long enough, I’ll eventually be able to forgive myself!”

But this won’t work.

Problems With Dwelling On The Past

1. You miss out on the present.

2. You can’t prepare for the future.

How To Not Dwell On The PastShift Your Thinking

1. Give yourself something else to think about. Like watching a OnePercentBetter video instead.

2. Establish goals for the future. It’s impossible to dwell on the past if you’re planning for the future.

Thing VIII: Don’t Repeat Your MistakesWhy We Make The Same Mistakes

We make the same mistakes due to being impulsive and stubborn.

The Problem With Repeating Mistakes

1. You won’t ever reach your goals.

2. Your friends and family may get tired of hearing you complain.

How To Avoid Repeating Mistakes

1. Study the Mistake

Take some time to evaluate your mistake and figure out what went wrong. What could you have done better?

2. Create a Plan

Be on the lookout for old behavior. Find a way to hold yourself accountable by keeping a journal.

Thing IX: Don’t Resent Other People’s Success

Occasional jealousy is normal. But resentment is unhealthy.

Why We Resent Other People’s Success

We resent people because we want what they have. It could be a nicer car or a better house.

The Problem With Resenting Other People’s Success

1. You’ll stop focusing on your own path to success.

2. You will damage relationships.

3. You will abandon your values.

How To Stop Resenting Other People’s Success

1. Focus on cooperation rather than competition. Whenever you get envious of someone, reach out to them and find ways where you could benefit each other. Your resentment will disappear when you see someone not as a competitor but as a valuable ally.

2. Practise celebrating other people’s accomplishments.

Thing X: Don’t Give Up After The First FailureWhy We Give Up

You might have the feeling that if you fail once you’re most likely to fail again so you don’t bother trying again.

The Problem With Giving In To Failure

Giving up after the first failure can become a bad habit. Each time you quit, you strengthen the idea that failure is bad, which will prevent you from trying again.

How To Avoid Giving UpChange The Way You Think About Failure

Here are some thoughts about failure that will likely discourage you from trying again:

1. Failure is unacceptable.

2. I’m either a complete success or a complete failure.

Replace the irrational thoughts with these realistic reminders:

1. Failure is often part of the journey to success.

2. I can handle failure.

Thing XI: Don’t Fear Alone TimeWhy We Avoid Being Alone

You might think that spending time alone is a waste of time. You’d rather not think about your problems, so you distract yourself with work and other activities in your life.

The Problem With Fearing Solitude

Here’s what research says are the benefits of alone time that you might be missing out on:

Solitude at the office can increase productivity. A study(2) found that most people in the study performed better when they had some privacy.

How To Not Fear Solitude

1. Practice Tolerating Silence

With practice it will become easier. Use your alone time to write in a journal about your goals and feelings.

2. Meditate

Meditation has been linked to a variety of emotional benefits, including helping to reduce negative emotions.

Thing XII: Don’t Feel Like The World Owes You Anything

We all want our fair share in life but the idea that you’re owed something just because of who you are or being a ‘’know it all’’ can harm your career and personal life.

Why We Feel The World Owes Us SomethingSocial media fuels mistaken beliefs about self-importance.Overindulgent parenting prevents children from learning how to accept responsibility for their behavior.The Problem With A Sense Of EntitlementYou’ll be less likely to work hard when you’re busy complaining that you’re not getting what you’re owed.When you don’t get everything you want entitlement can lead to feelings of bitterness as you’ll think you were victimized.How To Not Be Entitled

Develop Self-awareness Of Your Sense Of Entitlement

Try to become more aware of these subtle moments of entitlement. Look for thoughts such as:

“I’m not following that law because it’s stupid.”

“I’m more valuable than others.”

“There’s always been something really special about me.”

Thing XIII: Don’t Expect Immediate ResultsWhy We Expect Immediate ResultsWe underestimate how long change takes.We overestimate our abilities.The Problem With Expecting Immediate Results

You may be tempted to take shortcuts. It leads to negative emotions when your expectations aren’t met.

How To Stop Expecting Immediate ResultsCreate realistic expectations.Practice delaying gratification.Before You Go

Thank you for reading! Check out the video summary if you haven’t already. We upload animated book summary videos to every month!

Click to watch the video summary of 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do by Amy MorinRecap

Let’s recap. In today’s summary, you learned…

Thing I: Don’t Waste Time Feeling Sorry For yourself

Thing II: Don’t Give Away Your Power

Thing III: Don’t Shy Away From Change

Thing IV: Don’t Focus On The Things You Can’t Change

Thing V: Don’t Worry About Pleasing Everyone

Thing VI: Don’t Fear Taking Calculated Risks

Thing VII: Don’t Dwell On The Past

Thing IX: Don’t Resent Other People’s Success

Thing X: Don’t Give Up After The First Time

Thing XI: Don’t Fear Alone Time

Thing XII: Don’t Feel Like The World Owes You Anything

Thing XIII: Don’t Expect Immediate Results

References2003 study published in the Journal of Personality and Social PsychologyDugosh KL, Paulus PB, Roland EJ, Yang HC. Cognitive stimulation in brainstorming. J Pers Soc Psychol. 2000;79(5):722–735. doi:10.1037//0022–3514.79.5.722

The Laws of Human Nature by Robert Greene Book Summary

https://medium.com/media/07b95fd177873b93ae4198a1589eabc5/href6 Things The Laws Will Do For You

1. Make you a master interpreter of the cues that people continually emit, giving you a much greater ability to judge their character.

2. Empower you to take on and outthink the toxic types who inevitably cross your path and who tend to cause long-term emotional damage.

3. Teach you the true levers for motivating and influencing people, making your path in life that much easier.

4. Make you realize how deeply the forces of human nature operate within you, giving you the power to alter your own negative patterns.

5. Transform you into a more empathetic individual, creating deeper and more satisfying bonds with the people around you.

6. Alter how you see your own potential, making you aware of a higher, ideal self within you that you will want to bring out.

Ignore the laws at your own peril.

Refusing to come to terms with human nature simply means that you are dooming yourself to patterns beyond your control and to feelings of confusion and helplessness.

1. The Law of Irrationality

You like to think that you are in control of your life.

That you have an accurate view of the world. But beware. Your emotions are powerful. They cause you to react instead of think. To see the world based on how you feel, not how it actually is.

To become more rational, first become aware of your emotional self in action.

Then examine your emotion to their roots. Why do you pick up that joint, even though you know it makes you lazy and is holding you back from your goals?

Thirdly, increase your reaction time by taking a step back. That might mean putting the joint down and taking a deep breath.

And when it comes to other people, accept them for their irrational nature instead of trying to change them. That leads to emotional chaos.

These 4 things allow the rational mind to balance out the irrational mind so you can make better decisions.

2. The Law of Narcissism

The amount of self-love you have falls on a spectrum. If you have too much you become toxic and self-absorbed.

There’s been a rise in narcissistic traits in young people since the 1970’s, with a spike since 2000.

Possibly due to social interaction happening more online. Greene encourages turning self-absorption into empathy for others.

This can only be achieved by in-person interaction. Yes that means putting down the phone, getting out of your house and talking to real human beings.

3. The Law of Role-Playing

You put on a mask that puts you in the best possible light.

So do your friends. Just look at their lives on Instagram compared to what it’s really like.

You can use this awareness to better your ability at reading through the masks of others, and also how to present yourself in the best light to get what you want, like win a job interview.

To get good at reading through other’s masks and putting on one that benefits you in the right situations, it essentially comes down to understanding body language which is a topic for another book summary.

4. The Law of Compulsive Behavior

You have a set character. It’s formed based on your early childhood and daily habits. Resisting it makes it worse. You can’t completely change your character but you can mitigate its effects.

For example, you may have a tendency to please people. You might suck at a job where you have to fire people, but be awesome at being a waiter.

5. The Law of Covetousness

“Dangle in front of others what they are missing most in life what they are forbidden to have, and they will go crazy with desire.”

In this chapter, Greene focuses heavily on how you can use this lesson to your advantage. I see this a lot in the pickup community.

If they aren’t already super busy with their lives, guys are taught the tactic of purposely making themselves hard to reach so they become more desirable.

This can manifest as text messages that say they can only meet up for a date at 7:36pm on Saturday. When in reality they could do nearly any day at any time. Absence is powerful. We want we what do not have.

On the flipside, to ensure you don’t fall into the trap of always wanting more, remind yourself to be grateful for what you already have.

6. The Law of Shortsightedness

By default you care more about the present then you do about the future. Big Pharma takes advantage of this trait in you by selling you cures, not preventives.

Who wants to think about the consequences of a donut and cigarette when it’s right in front of you?

But know that every successful person you look up to will tell you they quit doing the little things that feel good now, in order to reap a sweeter reward later.

7. The Law of Defensiveness

We like to feel we are independent. That’s why become defensive when others try to change us.

But if you’re too defensive you could be holding yourself back from growing.

Remain open-minded.

If you want to influence someone who is defensive, Greene suggests you:

1. Transform into a deep listener

2. Infect people with the proper mood

3. Confirm their self-opinion

4. Allay their insecurities

5. Use people’s resistance and stubbornness by applying reverse psychology

8. The Law of Self-Sabotage

You may sabotage yourself because of a negative attitude. It holds you back from living the life of your dreams. Thankfully your attitude can be changed by consciously deciding.

Or it may take a significant life event.

Personally I’ve struggled with shifting my perspective in an instant. What has helped me is doing actions that I know are positive, even if I don’t feel like it. Like going for a walk.

And then doing as many of those actions as I can, as often as I can. For you it might take a snap of the fingers or a significant life event to change.

9. The Law of Repression

Have you ever been standing on a cliff with your friend and felt the odd desire to push them off?

Or maybe you have a partner but are sleeping with someone else behind their back because for some twisted reason, you feel alive.

Welcome to the dark side.

We all have a dark side. And the sooner you learn to embrace it rather than resist it, the sooner you. In fact, completely normal people are capable of doing monstrous things.

Greene relays the story of how President Lincoln would write anonymous letters to newspapers, attacking politicians. He developed an enemy that went mad with rage and challenged him to a duel.

He withdrew and did the right thing by directing his dark energy into winning debates and elections for the good of humanity.

Recap

Let’s recap. In today’s summary you learned…

1. The Law of Irrationality

2. The Law of Narcissism

3. The Law of Role-Playing

4. The Law of Compulsive Behavior

5. The Law of Covetousness

6. The Law of Shortsightedness

7. The Law of Defensiveness

8. The Law of Self-Sabotage

9. The Law of Repression

Conclusion

I’m Brandon, and I hope this book summary of The Laws of Human Nature made you one percent better. Part 2 coming soon.

1000 True Fans by Kevin Kelly (2-Minute Summary)

To make a living as an entrepreneur or a creative, you don’t need a million dollars or fans. You just need 1,000 true fans.

A true fan is someone who will buy anything you produce.

To make $100,000 per year, you must generate $100 profit from each true fan. That is fairly achievable compared to trying to get 1,000,000 people to follow you.

One caveat is that you must get paid directly so you can keep 100% of the profits and not have third party services take your money.

But realistically...

The E-Myth Revisited

Most entrepreneurs start out working a technical job then quit to build their own business. But after a while they get stressed, confused, and quickly fall into the deathly downward spiral called failure. Gerber calls these people technicians trying to be entrepreneurs.

The fatal assumption is that if you understand the technical work of a business, you understand a business that does that technical work.

In this summary of The E-Myth Revisited by Michael Gerber, you will learn how to grow...

The E-Myth Revisited

Most entrepreneurs start out working a technical job then quit to build their own business. But after a while they get stressed, confused, and quickly fall into the deathly downward spiral called failure. Gerber calls these people technicians trying to be entrepreneurs.

The fatal assumption is that if you understand the technical work of a business, you understand a business that does that technical work.

In this summary of The E-Myth Revisited by Michael Gerber, you will learn how to grow...

Models by Mark Manson

An honest guide to attracting women without faking behaviour, without lying, and without copying others. This is a book summary of Models by Mark Manson.

Before we begin, I want to tell you about my buddy and dating expert Jon who was once a virgin with low self-esteem and couldn’t talk to girls to save his life. But thanks to discipline, will, and mentorship – He transformed his dating life.

We have partnered to offer you 40% off his proven training program to get the girl of your dreams...