Tyler Colins's Blog, page 41

Day Two – And How are You?

Hey-ho, it’s Rey, welcoming you to Day Two of the 99-cent Coco’s Nuts promo.

Our second successful (paying) case was as exciting as it was demanding and dangerous.

Our quest: find out who has set up our client, Buddy Feuer, to take the rap for two murders, that of her boss, the infamous Jimmy Picolo, and her best friend, Jeb Stretta.  Nutty Coco, Buddy’s coworker, becomes an important part of the quest when he goes AWOL—he proves to be a major piece of the puzzle.

We get pretty good at dodging danger as we attempt to figure out what’s what and who’s who.  As we do, we meet a few limb-breakers and mob types, and avoid (barely) detonating bombs.  You know, despite the danger, it was kinda fun, except maybe the times we nearly ended up victims ourselves.

Maybe you’d like to check out our crazy adventures for the awesome price of 99 cents?  You can find Coco’s Nuts at:

https://www.amazon.ca/Cocos-Nuts-Tyler-Colins/dp/1078374368

Back tomorrow (hopefully with a guest post-er)!

NOTE: $0.99 promotions are active only in the US and UK stores.

Day Four, Just Two More

Hello everyone.  This is Francis Xavier Shillingford.  JJ requested I post on the second-last day of the 99-cent Forever Poi promotion (the fourth book in the Triple Threat Investigation Agency series).

I’d hired the three private investigators to help me with an investigation into two art gallery fires that also resulted in two fatalities.  I’d heard they were new to the P.I. scene, but committed and successful (with their first two official cases).

I thought I’d share an excerpt that features yours truly and the women—I hope it tweaks your interest so you might consider checking them out.

“How’s Crispy doing on this gorgeous Wednesday afternoon?” I slipped alongside.

“Friends call me Mr. Crispy, yeah?” A wide smile displayed two tiny front gold teeth.

Rey, Linda, and JJ parked themselves on the other side of the table after I introduced them as freelance insurance investigators.

With the barest of nods and an expression devoid of emotion, Crispy popped a couple of fries into his mouth as he peered from one face to the next, then stopped on mine.

“So, Mr. Jester Crispy Risco, tell us what you know about the two gutted dwellings that up until early last night served as art galleries. They were torched, right? Were Carlos Kawena and James-Henri Ossature the targets? Or were the two bodies collateral damage?”

Jester picked at the hamburger steak with child-sized fingers, three of which were horribly disfigured, like brittle twigs. The rest of the right hand resembled a spider’s web. A long twining scar on the left hairless arm had me once wondering if it was another “reminder” of bad deeds gone wrong.  It was.  I stole a fry and eyed him closely.

When he finally spoke, his voice was soft yet prickly, like pine needles. “They know for a fact it was them two?”

“No.”

He drew a long, steady breath. “Ain’t heard anything—as you would say—noteworthy.”

“What’s un-noteworthy then?” Rey asked casually.

The lover of hot and fiery things eyed her for several seconds. Again, there was no emotion. “Not frickin’ sure. Not yet.”

“Per our call earlier, have you started asking around?” I prodded.

“You know me, A. I’m a man of my word. But you also know my contacts are bat people; they love the night. They don’t take kindly to being bugged early in the day.”

“It’s two o’clock,” Linda pointed out.

His flat face finally conveyed emotion: amusement.

“For these folks, two is early in the day.” I smiled patiently and turned back to my informant. “Call me when you get something.”

Please check out these lovely ladies (and talented P.I.s) at:

https://www.amazon.ca/Forever-Poi-Tyler-Colins/dp/1079716483

NOTE: $0.99 promotions are active only in the US and UK stores.

Day One, Always Fun

Doing these posts.  It’s Rey, hey.  Welcome to Day One of the 99-cent Coco’s Nuts promo.  (Ya really can’t beat that price, can ya?)

This was our second successful case—and a challenging one it was, too.  Given I’m doing all five of these promotional posts, I’ll let JJ tell you how it all got started.

Take it away, Cousin Jilly!

As beautiful as a Bamboo Orchid and as cool as an English cucumber, Buddy Feuer seemed neither fazed nor anxious, given the grave predicament.  Tall and willowy, the thirty-four-year-old former society woman turned truck driver was easy on the eyes no matter what your predilection.  A “looker” or “dish” she might have been called back in the days of gin rickeys, trilbys, and gumshoes.  Some females truly lucked out in the comeliness lottery, as unconventional, chinchilla-faced Aunt Rowena Jaye was often heard to utter about a relation or friend (with a wistful, wishful sigh).

Buddy had contacted the Triple Threat Private Investigation Agency after researching our involvement—and success—with the handling of the “Gruesome Twosome Case” (as we’d jokingly dubbed our first P.I. job) and the ensuing arrest of our client, William Pierponce Howell.  The now-deceased WP Howell had been as wealthy as he’d been eccentric (a tactful way of saying f’g zany) and the murder of his young, pretty wife was not the only crime he’d been guilty of.  HPD’s Detective Gerald “Ald” Ives had been gracious enough during a media interview to credit the agency with providing “some valid crime-stopping information”, which had led to the apprehension of the millionaire and his equally culpable (f’g zany) partner.  The truth was we’d done considerably more, but we were cool with letting HPD take credit.

Our latest assignment was fairly clear-cut: prove Buddy hadn’t murdered renowned entrepreneur Jimmy Silone Picolo III. 

Jimmy Man-I’m-Fabulously-Rich Picolo was second-generation owner of a hapu’upu’u pickling factory called Braddah Jimmy’s Pickled Aquatic Delights (who’d have guessed preserved fish cheeks and eyes could be such popular delicacies).  In addition, the shrewd man owned JSP Capital-Credit Corporation and Balz to the Walz Incorporated, a demolition-construction company that knocked down buildings as rapidly as it put them up.  There were also pet projects here and there, little businesses he absorbed or annihilated. 

Slim and trim and relatively short, Jimmy was a cross between Dean Martin and Sal Mineo in their heydays.  Over the years, the attractive man had rubbed a few people the wrong way.  You see, equally successful had been his loansharking and racketeering—excuse me, alleged loansharking and racketeering. 

We got ya curious?  Check out Coco’s Nuts at:

https://www.amazon.ca/Cocos-Nuts-Tyler-Colins/dp/1078374368

Catch ya again tomorrow!

NOTE: $0.99 promotions are active only in the US and UK stores.

Day Three, Yippee

Rey’s title, not mine, but it works, I guess.  Hi, it’s JJ on Day Three of the Forever Poi 99-cent promo.

I was hoping that Xavier Shillingford (our insurance-adjuster friend) might help me with the post today, but he has an urgent meeting with an important client on Maui.  Maybe next time.

A quick rundown re Forever Poi, the fourth mystery in the Triple Threat Investigation Agency series, in case you’re not familiar with the storyline . . .

Our third official [paying] case has me, Rey and Linda solving a double-arson and murder.  Someone torched two new Chinatown art galleries and left two charred bodies in the ashes, and Xavier hires us to find the arsonist/killer.  There are a number of persons who could be the culprit—a former queenpin, an up-and-coming artist, two very angry exes, people with perilous pasts, money-lusting individuals. A few actually end up fatalities themselves. 

It’s a winding, rolling road we travel as we endeavor to solve the mystery, and we enjoy every minute of it—except maybe when we find an aimed gun in our faces. 

I hope I’ve tweaked your interest.  Please check us out at:

https://www.amazon.ca/Forever-Poi-Tyler-Colins/dp/1079716483

NOTE: $0.99 promotions are active only in the US and UK stores.

Day Two, It’s Lindy-Loo

I’m so not liking Rey’s “nickname”, but what can you do?  It floats her boat.  Anyway, you have Linda on promo post patrol today.

Forever Poi, the fourth mystery in our Triple Threat Investigation Agency series is available for $0.99 through December 13th!

Instead of me summarizing our adventures, I thought I’d invite Crispy to offer his take.  Crispy, also known as Jester Risco by his family, is a local “retired” torch.

Crispy, buddy, would you like to give these people a sum-up?

Sure, Lindy-Loo, uh, Linda.  Love to.

So, peeps, I got to know the girls, uh, women from the private-eye agency after two Chinatown art galleries burned down.  They actually thought I was responsible for the fires.  LMAO   I’m good, but not a professional . . . not like this torch.

Anyhow, as a friend of Xavier Shillingford, an  insurance adjuster who hired the three ladies, I got to learn about how things were going in their mission to find the person who set the fire and killed two people before setting it. 

You know, they’re pretty good at being P.I.s.—bug a lot of people, ask a ton of questions, check out all clues, and run into some nasty folks who wouldn’t mind blowing their heads off for sticking their noses where they don’t belong. 

There’s an art-gallery owner—partner of the one that was found dead in the ashes—who’s got a weird past.  He’s got an equally weird half-sister who gets whatever she wants, whatever the cost.  She’s got some pals and partners who are pretty dicey, too; you wouldn’t want to meet them in a dark alley. 

As JJ, Rey and Linda nose around, a few more bodies fall to their feet.  It’s a complicated case, for sure, but they don’t give up.  You got to hand it to them for that perseverance; it’s outstanding.

I don’t want to give any more away, so I’ll leave it at that.  If you want a fun read—and want to get to know these pretty private eyes a little better—I recommend you check out the Forever Poi case.

On that note, I better go; I’ve got to meet my parole officer in ten.

Thanks Crispy!  Hope your meeting goes well.  I’m sure those community hours will be completed in no time.

For those who might be interested, you can find Forever Poi here . . .

https://www.amazon.ca/Forever-Poi-Tyler-Colins/dp/1079716483

NOTE: $0.99 promotions are active only in the US and UK stores.

Day One . . . Hey There, Hon!

Hey, it’s Rey . . . offering the first promotional post re Forever Poi, the fourth mystery in our Triple Threat Investigation Agency series.  Today through December 13th you can get the book for $0.99 (I’d say that’s a major bargain, and I love those!)

This one has us pretty private eyes—Cousin Jilly (JJ), my BFF Linda, and me—solving a double-arson and murder.  We have to discover who torched two Chinatown art galleries and left two charred bodies in the rubble.  Not an easy task, for sure!

Are the torch and killer the same person?  We tend to think so.  The day before the fire, Carlos Kawena, one of the arson victims, had a real nasty break-up with his partner, James-Henri Ossature.  There were financial issues, too.  Maybe James-Henri did the dastardly deed to collect insurance and be rid of his lover.  The second victim, Mary-Louise Crabtree, was a former queenpin.  Given that woman’s dicey past, maybe someone she riled in past could have flown over to have revenge.  If so, it’s possible Carlos was collateral damage.

We’re hired by insurance adjuster Xavier Shillingford—a real cutie, I might add—to assist in the investigation and it soon becomes pretty obvious that professional arsonists had nothing to do with this fatal fire.  We quiz a lot of curious characters as we determine who’s who, and it seems that any one of them could be our culprit.

Interestingly enough, Mary-Louise had changed her name (again) and become an artist manager.  Her new life seemed on the up-and-up, but not long after she bites the bullet, a promising new client, Bizz Waxx, also ends up murdered.  Why?  Did he learn something about her—like maybe she was involved in something illegal?  There’s also James-Henri’s beautiful—and mysterious—half-sister, Cholla Poniard, who also has ties to the art world.  As an FYI, two of her “celebrity” divorces ended with ugly consequences for the exes—and both affirm that multi-talented Cholla is a dangerous woman who has her way, at any cost.

If you’re interested in reading about our exciting case, please check us out at:

https://www.amazon.ca/Forever-Poi-Tyler-Colins/dp/1079716483

NOTE: $0.99 promotions are active only in the US and UK stores.

Aloh-hawaii

A new posting assignment from Boss Lady (as opposed to “The Boss”), otherwise known as Cousin Reynalda.  She thought posts about Hawaii would be a pleasant change (uh, we haven’t had any of late??).

Linda took it one step further and suggested we write about our favorite Hawaiian author or Hawaiian-themed story.  I liked that idea but Rey not so much (she doesn’t read a lot).

It’s JJ, just in case you weren’t sure, and I’ll go first (Rey’s still scratching her head and uttering words best left unwritten).  I have to go with Kaui Hart Hemmings’ The Descendants.  I loved the movie, as I once posted, so much so I finally read the book.  It was everything I expected and wanted—a great character-driven story.  The book, as an FYI, is told from a man’s POV, yet written by a woman.  It works; it sounds natural and flows well.

The storyline revolves around Matt King, a well-to-do [somewhat self-absorbed, or is that workaholic?] lawyer who is the descendant of a Hawaiian princess.  He’s also a husband who finds himself having to play father/parent when his wife ends up in a coma.  The two daughters, pre-teen Scottie and seventeen-year-old Alex, prove a handful . . . and make him realize how out-of-touch he’s been with his family.

Parenting skills take time to master, but thrust into the role of mother as well as father, Matt begins to develop as pater and person.  Soul-searching accompanies him on the journey for truth and self.  Yes, it sounds like it might be a heavy read, but it’s not; there’s humor . . . even during dire moments.

I look at the photo, which looks like those joke snapshots everyone takes of someone sleeping. I don’t know why we think they’re so funny. There’s a lot that can be done to you while you’re sleeping. This seems to be the message. Look how vulnerable you are, the things you aren’t aware of. Yet in this picture you know she isn’t just sleeping. Joanie has an IV and something called an endotracheal tube running out of her mouth to a ventilator that helps her breathe. She is fed through a tube and is administered enough medication to sustain a Fijian village. Scottie is documenting our life for her social studies class. Here’s Joanie at Queen’s Hospital, her fourth week in a coma, a coma that has scored a 10 on the Glasgow scale and a III on the Rancho Los Amigos scale. She was in a race and was launched from an offshore powerboat going eighty miles an hour, but I think she will be okay.

The Descendants is a great, easy read, something pleasantly diverting to hunker down with on a stormy day or evening.  If I were giving stars, I’d give five out of five.

Aloha, my friends.

Laughing Out Loud – Literally

HA-HA-HA-HA, the fifth mystery in the Triple Threat Investigation Agency series, has our private eyes—JJ, Rey, and Linda—caught up in a serial killer’s sadistic game.  And he wants the trio to play by his rules, “ha-ha, ha-ha”.

GrimReaperPeeper, or GRP as they call him, proves to be as charming as he is calculating and cruel . . . and the four develop an odd bond as more victims fall prey.  What is the significance of the floral etchings and black roses found on the fatalities?  Why are they found in particular locations?  Is there a common denominator?  . . . And just how long, and where else, has he been committing these baffling murders?

Who is GRP?  A true “whacko”?  A disgruntled man with an axe to grind?  He doesn’t appear to follow the usual serial killer profile.  Perhaps he’s a professional?  Someone wealthy?  An individual no one would ever suspect?

Whoever he is, he’s good—very smart and exceptionally shrewd.  Fingerprints and DNA are never found at the crime scenes.  While JJ, Rey and Linda diligently attempt to determine his identity, they accept a couple of casual cases—that of a wayward hubby (they’ve proven fairly accomplished at those) and a stalker shadowing a pretty, young woman.  

With the assistance of Detective Ald Ives and a couple of his seasoned detectives, handsome Hammill and surly Sallo, the three private eyes travel winding trails, search for useable clues, and are yanked into dangerous situations that could, ultimately, prove terminal.

This non-official case is as complex as it is confounding, but as is the trio’s way, they won’t give up.  They must stop GRP . . . before he potentially stops them.

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Hey, it’s Rey!  Not a bad synopsis for our latest case.  Our boss figures it’ll be out there early next year.  We’ll keep ya posted!  

T’is the Season – Sorta

Hey, it’s Rey!  How’s everyone doin?!

T’is the season to be thankful and Thanksgiving gave us reason to be just that . . . and got me all revved up for Black Friday.  Mannnnnnn, did I have a great time with all those sales!  (Yeah, okay, so I’ll spend a few months—all right, years—paying it all off, but it was funnnnnnn.)

Given the boss is in a slump at the moment (the poor dear wonders if she’ll ever have control of her own life), we elected to take over today’s post.  Okay, I did.  JJ’s still got a Thanksgiving pumpkin-pie hangover and Linda’s slumped on the lanai, wishing she’d not shoved down that fourth mushroom-heavy tofu burger.

Today, I’m just touching upon things to be grateful for, now and to come:

friends and family    first responders and those who so unselfishly think of and put others first    compassionate souls   easy-going colleagues  kind words  smiles and chuckles  bellyache laughter  unconditional love (like those our pets give, in spades)  supportive professionals  starry nights and sunny days    sunsets and sunrises  colorful flowers  stunning nature  pumpkin pie with real whipped cream (I just heard a shriek from JJ, he-he)  pepperoni-less pizza (!)  hopes and dreams and wishes    worry-less times  pleasant/pleasing music and enjoyable dance tunes    fantastic films  great stories  enlightening posts  beautiful poetry  and super-duper sales!

It’s been a crazy year so far, to say the least, and maybe it’ll only get crazier.  But here’s to staying strong and safe, keeping the faith, and believing next year is going to be a [much] smoooooooooooooth(er) one.

Have an awesome weekend.  The Boss should be back Wednesday, in better spirits (I’ve got her making a list, he-he).

God bless.

Michele’s Seamless Fishnets

I’m referring to Michele E. Northwood’s “seamless” smooth-reading Fishnets in the Far East: A Dancer’s Diary in Korea.  It was a great, riveting read that compelled me to give it a five-star rating (please see last week’s review).  I’d gotten so involved in the three women’s lives and mis-adventures, I found myself wondering what transpired after they’d returned home.

I contacted Michele and asked if she’d be interested in doing an interview—she was!  If you’ve not yet read Fishnets, please do; you won’t regret it.  And if you have and you’re curious to find out more . . . here you go, my friends . . .

An obvious question: do you still keep in touch with anyone from the Fishnet days?  If so, who?  Do you reminisce?  Or do you just not go there?

I’m still in touch with Louise via Facebook.  Occasionally, we share photos and reminisce, but as I mentioned at the end of my book, the memory fades and we tend to obliterate the bad experiences and remember the good ones.  Although it’s impossible to forget some of the experiences, we usually talk about funny or pleasant times and ignore the negatives.  Occasionally, the name of our agent pops up, but I think time mellows a person and I hold no malice towards him.  

When did you begin writing the book?  What served as the “trigger” to write it?

To answer that question, I have to go back to my time in Korea.  I knew from the first couple of days being in that country that we were living through a unique and once-in-a-lifetime experience, so I kept a detailed diary of every single day.  I came across the two notebooks I had filled a couple of years ago, and when I sat down to read them again, I realised that it would make an interesting book.  I thought that the uniqueness of the situation would be eye-opening, not only for other dancers but for readers interested in travel and the Far East, as well as appealing to anyone with a curiosity to discover the not-so-idyllic truth behind a dancer’s life.

It took me over a year to write the book and it was released in 2019.

 What were your takeaways from the experience?  Any regrets?  Lessons learned?

I have no regrets about doing the contract.  Although I went through some unpleasant experiences, the three of us dealt with each episode with a lot of laughter, something that I also wanted to get across in the book.  It wasn’t all doom and gloom; we had some good times too.

The experience made me mature and become a much stronger person.  I was an extremely naïve twenty-year-old who was thrown into a seedy world that I was ill-equipped to deal with.  I soon realised the need to stand up for myself if I hoped to see this contract through to the end.  But I was lucky to have Louise as my friend, as she was much more worldly-wise and mothered me for the first few months of the contract.

Some readers have asked me why I didn’t just go home.  This would have been impossible.  I was on the other side of the world at a time when cheap airfares were nonexistent and a one-way ticket back to the UK was eight hundred pounds.  This was a huge amount of money for me at that time, and with our intermittent salary being literally drip-fed to us by our agent, the thought of saving up enough money to buy a ticket home was an insurmountable task.

I think we were all committed to seeing the contract through, regardless of the circumstances. As I said earlier, in between the bad experiences, there were some good times too. These positive experiences kept us all going.

I have no regrets about my time there, I think I grew as a person, particularly mentally, and I learnt to accept that throughout life there is always a Ying and a Yang. We all experience good and bad events throughout our lives and we have to deal with whatever life throws our way.    

That’s a great, sage outlook.  What happened after?  How did the experience affect you?

Well, believe it or not, I went on my next contract with the same agent!  This time I travelled to the island of Hokkaido in Japan!   (In fact, I’ve just released the second book in the Fishnets series. Here is the link: https://www.amazon.co.uk/s?k=Fishnets+and+Fire-eating&i=digital-text&ref=nb_sb_noss_2

I guess I felt that if I could cope with Korea, then Japan couldn’t be any worse.  Japan was a totally different experience.  I enjoyed the contract, but once again I experienced some daunting experiences along with a lot of laughter and weird experiences.  To whet your appetite, here is the blurb from the new book:

[image error]This amusing, true story tells the tale of four young, professional dancers who travel to the island of Hokkaido, an area steeped in mystery, myths and legendary beasts.  When the quartet discovers that they are living next door to an ancient Japanese Indian tribe, they drunkenly decide to conduct a Ouija board session and, from that night onwards, things never seem quite the same again.  Not knowing, understanding or really appreciating the ancient Japanese traditions, culture or etiquette, the quartet finds themselves in some hilarious situations as well as living through some shocking real-life experiences.  They stumble their way around massage parlours and maternity hospitals, museums and temples, learning the intricacies of the hot baths and the Japanese green tea ritual.

The girls are plunged into a world of secrets and mysteries where nothing appears to be what it seems.  People vanish without a trace, and there is the strange disappearance of a large amount of money. What is the big secret on the island?  Who is in control?  Will the girls manage to keep themselves safe?  And will they ever uncover the truth behind these mysteries that seem to enshroud them all?

Sounds intriguing!  You’ve certainly sold me; I can’t wait to read it.   . . . Have you returned to Korea since?

No, I have never returned. I sometimes imagine going there out of curiosity, to see how it must have changed since 1989.  It would be interesting to visit the same old haunts, but as I have a terrible sense of direction, I´d probably never find them again!

How did your sister’s time in Korea go?

As I mentioned in the book, she seemed to have hit the jackpot compared to me.  Her agent seemed attentive to the trio and their accommodation was almost palatial compared to our digs.  However, her relationship with her agent also turned sour.  He became abusive towards the girls and my sister eventually left, leaving the two other girls she was contracted with to work as a duet.  She started modelling in Korea which was more lucrative and on her return to the UK, she never danced again.

Good for her; a happy ending, indeed.

Thanks so much, Michele, for sharing this captivating insight into yourself and your fantastic journey.   You’ve certainly piqued my interest and I’ll be looking for Book #2!

A few more fascinating facts about Michele—she:

◊  was not only a dancer, but a magician and fire-eater who toured the world for 20+ years in theatre, musicals and circus    ◊  went back to school upon retiring from the entertainment world and now has a First Class Honours degree in Modern languages, (English and Spanish)    ◊  has been in the Guinness Book of Records, during her years in entertainment for being part of the world’s largest Human mobile while working for the circus of horrors as their first “Girl inside a bottle” (wow!)    ◊  rubbed shoulders with Sting, Chris de Burgh, David Copperfield, Claudia Schiffer and Maurice Gibb from the Bee Gees    ◊  worked as a knife throwers assistant; assisted a midget in his balancing act; and also taken part in the finale of a Scorpions’ concert.

Michele currently lives in Spain with her Spanish husband, Randy, two dogs and two cats, and is an English teacher, preparing students for the prestigious Cambridge English examinations.

A great concern of Michele’s is climate change, the abundance of plastic pollution, and hates the way man unkindly treats the other species that inhabit this beautiful planet, which we are slowly destroying.   She loves living in the countryside with views of the sea and likes nothing better than to sit on the terrace at the end of the day, looking up at the stars and contemplating.

She can be contacted/followed at:

https://www.facebook.com/michele.e.northwoodauthor

Twitter : @northwood_e

Pinterest board: michele e. northwood pinterest.es https://www.pinterest.es/nextchapterpub/pinterest-board-michele-e-northwood/

Books by Michele:

Fishnets in the Far East: A Dancer’s Diary in Korea (a true story)

Fishnets and Fire-eating: A Dancer’s True Story in Japan

The Blood Red Retreat (coming soon)

The Circus Affair