Sara R. Turnquist's Blog, page 17

OVERCOMING MY SCHEDULE: My 3-Fold Purpose

Ever felt overwhelmed by your schedule?

Had too many things on the “To Do” list than you could possible do that day? Orthat week?

Do you know all too well the intense stress of having too many things to do right now and nothing can be put off?

Brothers, sisters, we can commiserate together! You are in good company. These questions are solid YES’s for me. I have hunted and searched and tried numerous ways to hone and tune my schedule to make the most out of the time I have. I’ve even blogged about.

I have talked about “finding your purpose/goal/calling and take everything else out of your schedule”…

Now, that is all-star advice. Because, even though that other stuff may be good, it can be excess, clutter, things that would be, again, good, but not necessarily good for you at this time.

So, what’s the problem? Seems I found the answer: find my calling/purpose/goal and focus on that, letting the other things slide by.

And I have. My family (my role as mom/wife), my writing career (writing/marketing/editing/etc), and the moms’ ministry I help coordinate. These are the things God is calling me to right now in life. These are the things that fill my schedule and take priority. The other stuff…gets a harder look…realizing that if I say “yes”, I do so to the detriment of one of these things or to myself.

Here’s the problem…I tend to be a people pleaser. Yep. I said it. It’s not a bad thing. Having a servant heart is a very good thing. It is a gift. The challenge is taking responsibility over that heart. Because you were made for service, yes, but for service in some areas, not in all. You were not intended to wear to the bone, sacrificing your called areas, for the sake of service.

I recently finished Lysa TerKeurst’s book “The Best Yes“…and that book was soooo freeing! It spoke directly to where I was struggling–as a people pleaser; as a woman who has grown up in the church hearing how we are to serve, serve, serve; as a person who is just overwhelmed.

See, as TerKeurst presents, when you keep saying “yes” to things you aren’t called to, even for the sake of service, you may miss out on God’s specific calling on your life. To say “yes” to this thing, means to say “no” to other things. We all have the same 24 hours in each day. And we choose how we spend those hours.

And I, for one, would prefer to spend my life pursuing my calling, my purpose, than bowing to an insane schedule that is idealistic, yes, but also frankly unrealistic.

So, friends, let us evaluate where our heart is. Where our time is. And how we want to spend our days. Let’s be proactive, not reactive. (Placing things on our schedule, rather than adding things at the random requests of others.)

My default answer to a request now is “I’ll have to check my schedule and get back to you.” If they push for an answer now, the answer has to be “no”. I can no longer give of myself blindly.

There is a cost for every “yes”. I’ll say that again–there is a cost for every “yes”.

Count it.

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Lysa TerKeurst Purpose Quote

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GIVEAWAY & INTERVIEW: Author Cindy Ervin Huff

Hello, readers! I hope you are all well and enjoying the summer weather…even if it is a little hot and a bit stormy at times. Seems like the right time to curl up with a good book to me. At the beach, in the mountains, on the back porch, at the pool…wherever! ESPECIALLY if it’s raining. Nothing better than a cozy house with a blanket, a coffee (insert “tea” if you’d prefer), and a good book.

My guest today is here to introduce us to her newest release which promises to be such a book. Romance, internal struggles, connection, overcoming…sounds like a good read to me! But I’m getting ahead of myself…and her. Let me let her share…

Welcome, Cindy! And thanks for joining us today. First, can you tell us a little about New Duet?

Aurora, Illinois

The idea for this novel came to me while I was part of a church’s worship team. A what if moment. What if the worship leader dropped dead. I have the greatest respect for that worship leader, so the idea was nothing personal. Several years earlier a missionary had dropped dead during an elders’ meeting due to an aneurysm. That idea germinated into the story line of an abused widow starting over in a new town. (Why not make it my town Aurora, Illinois) and meeting a wounded warrior who was adjusting to life minus a leg and aided by his service dog. Each need to start over and come to understand themselves and grow in faith.

I’m in a military town and come from a military family (my grandfather was a career military man) and there is hardly a family in the area who is not touched by the army in some way. The concept of your novel definitely speaks to me. What was the inspiration for New Duet?

The emotional issues Isabella and Dan struggle with are the same as some of my friends and family. My oldest son works hard to keep his PTSD under control. It is not as violent as the media portrays it. But depression and panic attacks are often a part. The issues of domestic violence are common, sadly, even in the church.

Wow. So you write from a place of deep knowledge. The media definitely doesn’t do the best job portraying many mental illnesses. I am still in recovery from postpartum depression (experienced after each of my three children). It’s not exactly what the media portrays either. What they show is usually postpartum psychosis. Not quite the same.

Did you always want to be a writer? If not, what did you want to be when you were a child?

I did. But I also wanted to be an actress. I think writing novels is a great way to create characters too.

So true. Brandilyn Collins writes books about developing characters utilizing what she learned pursuing theater. It’s an interesting concept. One I wouldn’t have thought of.

When did you first realize you wanted to be a writer?

When my 8th grade teacher entered my short story in a writing contest. I didn’t win or even place, but the die was cast.

I imagine so! It only takes a taste, doesn’t it? But, as you know, it’s not all rainbows and sunshine…there are things we don’t like as much. What part of the writing process do you dread?

Editing.

Truth. Do you have any suggestions to help me become a better writer?

Keep writing every day. It doesn’t have to be good writing just consistent. Keep a notebook in your purse and others around your house so you can jot down ideas. And read, read, read in the genre you want to write in and craft books. Attend conferences and network, network, network. What I learned there was priceless. And the critique groups I’m in has grown my writing by leaps and bounds.

Well said. I noticed that you founded a Word Weavers group. I have recently discovered that these exist. I hope to become part of a nearby group soon or start my own! I am currently in a critique group, but I like what Word Weavers has to offer.

What are you currently reading?

A novella collection The Cowboys of Summer. I just finished Backcountry Brides Romance Collection, these help me focus on correcting stuff in my own novella that has a deadline this August.

I LOVE those Barbour novella collections! They are great for a great quick read or getting yourself in a setting (i.e. I was writing in a ranch setting and grabbed the “Cowboy Bride Collection” – not for research, but to put me in that mood.)

What kind of music, if any, do you listen to when you write?

I prefer quiet or instrumental only, otherwise I tend to sing along.

I’m the same way

CHARACTER INTERVIEW & GIVEAWAY: Amanda of “A Convenient Risk”

Hey, everyone! I know, I know, this is normally the day you get to meet a “new-to-you” author and learn about fabulous new books. But today, I am doing something a little bit different. Oh, it’s still and interview, as you can see, but it’s an interview with Amanda, one of the characters from A Convenient Risk. I have included the particulars about the book below and I am offering a giveaway this week as well (see details farther down).

Because of this unique situation, I will put the book details before the interview. Enjoy!

A Convenient Risk

 

A widow with a young son is in trouble.

Amanda Haynes must put aside her grief and do something to take care of her son. Marrying a struggling rancher who wants her dead husband’s herd appears to be her only choice.

Only…she’s never going to love again. No one can replace the only man that ever loved her.

Butting heads over managing the ranch, her frustrations seem insurmountable. What has she gotten herself into? Is there any way out?

You’ll never put down this marriage of convenience romance, because everyone has hope.

Enjoy an Excerpt

CHAPTER ONE ~ Beginnings & Endings ~ Scene Six

Brandon fidgeted with the cuffs of his best Sunday jacket. Moisture beaded on his forehead. Was it warm in here? He shot a glance at the preacher. The man seemed fairly comfortable in his jacket.

Perhaps it was something else then. He gazed up at the ceiling and took some deep breaths. Was he truly that nervous? Why? It wasn’t as if this was a real marriage. Though it was the only one he would ever have.

He never had such silly notions as love. That was a grand idea, but did those marriages ever work out? His parents had been matched for better reasons and they seemed well suited for one another. Surely that was wisdom enough to seek a more logical process for choosing one’s life partner.

And what he knew of Amanda Haynes, though little, did not put him off. She was pleasant enough to gaze upon. Everyone that spoke of her told of what a good wife she was. The only criticism Cook had ever heard tell of was that she kept to herself. He could find no fault in that. That may even be a trait that earned her admiration in his book.

A hand landed on his shoulder. He turned toward its source. Reverend Mason looked at him.

“I’m certain she will be here any moment.”

Brandon nodded. How long had it been? Was she late? He glanced over at Uncle Owen and Cook, seated in the first pew. Uncle Owen gave him a nod and a smile.

Was he doing the right thing? No doubt he did the prudent thing. For this poor widow and for his own ranch. But did he preclude her from finding love again? That is if she put such stock in these things.

The door to the small church opened, breaking his thoughts. Amanda stepped in, holding her son’s hand, straggling behind. As she walked down the aisle toward him, her eyes remained glued to the floor. But his were on her. Would he remember how she looked this day?

She wore a cream colored shirt trimmed in lace fabric. Her skirt was smooth and pink. Perhaps her best church outfit. Had he expected a white dress? No, that would not have been appropriate for a woman who had…well, who had already been married.

Her long blonde hair had been pulled back and up in an attractive style with curls piled on top. She had even adorned the right side with flowers which matched the bouquet she carried.

The boy did not seem aware or pleased at the circumstances. He fairly scowled as his mother pulled him along behind her. As she neared the front of the church, she set him on the front pew opposite Uncle Owen and Cook. She spoke some words to him in hushed tones. He whined in protest, but soon quieted. Then she pressed a kiss to his hair and he leaned back, folding his arms across his chest.

What was Brandon going to do about the boy? He hadn’t considered how the youngster would feel about a new man in his mother’s life. And so soon after his father’s death. But nothing could be done about it at this point. Sometimes very adult decisions had to be made regardless.

Amanda turned and faced Brandon, smoothing a hand down her skirt. Then her eyes were on his. And his breath caught. She was quite a sight up close. Her cheeks were flushed and eyes bright from the slight exertion. That only served to highlight her features.

“Sorry I’m late.” Her words came out in a breath.

Brandon opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. So, he closed his mouth and simply nodded.

“If everyone is ready, we can begin,” the preacher stepped closer to them.

Amanda nodded, licking her lips and grasping her flowers. Did he see a slight trembling in the delicate buds?

“Yes, Reverend,” he said, swallowing against a dry mouth. He shifted to face Pastor Mason and sensed Amanda do the same.

The preacher spoke words about the institution of marriage, but Brandon had a difficult time listening. He found himself stealing glances at Amanda. What was she thinking? Did she have second thoughts? Regrets?

Still, they moved through the ceremony, responding in turn when they were asked to.

Amanda spoke the words that would bind her to Brandon seemingly without hesitation. Should it surprise him? It did.

“Now it is time for the presentation of the rings.” Reverend Mason turned toward Brandon. “Do you have the rings?”

Brandon reached in his pocket and produced the circlets of gold.

“Will you take the smaller ring and place it on your bride’s finger and repeat after me?”

Brandon spoke the words after the preacher as he took Amanda’s smaller hand in his underneath the bouquet. Sliding the ring on her finger, which seemed impossibly smaller than his, he was surprised when he encountered resistance. Her other wedding band.

His eyes shot to hers.

Hazel eyes widened and slid closed.

Reverend Mason, having paused, spoke in that moment. “Is there a problem?”

Brandon slid his wedding band off of her finger.

Amanda pulled her hand out from under the bouquet.

The preacher’s brows shot up. “I see.” He eyed Brandon. As did Amanda.

Everyone seemed to be waiting on him with baited breath. What was he to do? Was it his place to remove Jed’s wedding band? Surely that was something she needed to do. But everyone looked at him as if he were to be the one to act.

So, he reached for her hand once more. Her eyes flitted between his and the wedding band on her finger. He gently grasped it and pulled. It wouldn’t come. Twisting a little, he felt it budge. From there, it took little work to get Jed’s wedding band off.

His face warmed. Why did he have to do that? It just wasn’t right. To remove another man’s claim on his wife. She should have been the one to do it.

But he held fast as he slid his wedding band onto her finger.

Reverend Mason let out a sigh and continued, instructing Amanda to place the other wedding band on Brandon’s finger.

He held out the wedding band to her, but he now held Jed’s wedding band and the one for him in his hand.

As her fingers reached for the band, they hovered for just a moment over her former band. Perhaps no one else would have noticed. But Brandon did. And why shouldn’t she? It had been on her finger for years. She must be loathe to part with it, perhaps one of the last pieces of her husband she had left.

Still, she picked up the band for Brandon and slid it onto his finger, releasing his hand as soon as the ring was securely on.

Brandon continued to watch her face, but her eyes shifted toward the preacher soon after. Was she afraid? Embarrassed? He had not meant to offend her.

But he turned his attention toward the preacher as well for the remainder of the simple ceremony. It wasn’t long before Reverend Mason spoke the final words and declared them husband and wife.

“You may now kiss your bride.”

Brandon looked over at Amanda. She didn’t meet his eyes. Her gaze caught on his chest. Why had he not thought about this particular part of the ceremony? The woman seemed so scared, so vulnerable.

She needn’t be, he decided. So, he leaned forward, tilting his head down and pressed a kiss to the side of her face before pulling back.

Then she met his gaze, eyes wide. Did she wonder at his simple contact? He wanted nothing more from her than what they had discussed. If she feared differently, than she was mistaken.

All he wanted…needed was that cattle. He needed it desperately. Now it was his. And that was all that mattered.

Teaser Trailer

Buy Link

Amazon

Interview: Amanda

Hello, Amanda, I hope you are well. I understand that you have recently lost your husband. I am sorry to hear that. But congratulations are also in order, I suppose as you have remarried as well.

It’s not like that. My son needed…we needed…it’s not as you make it sound.

I apologize. I did not intend to “make it sound” any way at all. Merely making conversation.

Alright. Perhaps we can just get to these questions, since we are off to such a great start

OVERCOMING MYSELF: Getting Out Of My Own Way

As you know, this blog has become so much about the things that I have had to overcome in my life. And there have been so many, I have found, who can relate. Those who have encountered similar struggles with depression, grief, children who don’t “fit the profile”, and the like.

Well, what happens when you realize that YOU are the one holding yourself back? That’s what I want to explore a bit today. Because I have found that I can be my own biggest obstacle. And what an insurmountable obstacle I can be!

How did I come to this great epiphany? That is a good question. I have, for some time, had the suspicion that my very loving husband and encouraging friends, who became a vital support network in my recovery (from depression) process, had become more than a net to catch me. That I had, well, over-used that “net” and it was becoming more of a hammock, if you will. Especially my husband.

One might call that co-dependancy.

Maybe.

Okay…probably.

Then, the opportunity for me to go to a writers conference in the mountains came. This is a conference I have had my eye on for a few years now and it just hasn’t worked out. This year it did…but there was one catch: neither my husband nor my usual “conference buddy” could go with me. I would have to go alone.

Well, that’s a little intimidating.

No worries, I thought. I got this.

And to prove it, I’ll make it an extended vacation – I’ll visit family in that part of the country and even sightsee before returning home.

So, now that the reservations are made and paid for, the family arrangements made, and the sightseeing adventures booked and cancellation dates passed, I have realized what I have done.

Oops.

Can I really do this?

Really?

Like, without someone there to be with me?

As it turns out…yes. The conference is half over and I am doing well. I do miss my kids and husband, and am tired, but I am actually excited about my mini-vacation after the conference.

It’s taken the better part of this first half of the conference for me to step out of my own way and make myself see that I can do this AND enjoy it. Without a friend-parachute. Relying on my own devices. Networking all on my own.

It just took this push…a driving reason to get me out of my comfort zone, and I found that this baby bird could fly. If I just trusted my wings.

What have you done lately that you just needed to get over yourself to do?

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GIVEAWAY & INTERVIEW: Author B.W. Morris

Hello, all! Sorry you haven’t heard from me in a while. It’s been all craziness here as I get ready to head off to North Carolina for the Blue Ridge Mountain Christian Writers Conference! I am so excited. It will be my first time at this particular conference and I am beyond thrilled to be in beautiful Asheville.

Today, I have a great author to introduce–B.W. Morris. He is another Clean Reads author and his novels have definitely intrigued me. I will admit that I got caught up in the excerpt. My next stop, I think, will be Amazon

GIVEAWAY & INTERVIEW: Author Sinmisola Ogunyinka

I have a fabulous book to introduce today! It actually just released this week and already is ranked by Amazon as a “#1 New Release” in its category. So a congratulations goes out to author Sinmisola Ogunyinka both on her release and on her novel’s progress! I met Sinmisola through our publishing company’s Facebook page. That fabulous Clean Reads site that allows us to share information and encourage one another. Priceless, I tell ya’. Priceless. But, I won’t ramble on, I’ll get right to Sinmisola.

Than you again for being on the blog! First things first, can you tell us a little about your novel?

My novel, Under a Red Delta Sun, is a Young Adult African Suspense Thriller centered around three teenagers, all from wealthy families, but with different life issues. Two girls, Temly and Asabi are childhood friends with a secret between them: Asabi is being sexually abused by her stepfather, and planning to run away from home. Temly’s family could help but Asabi made Temly promise she would not tell her parents. On the day Asabi finally agrees Temly could let her parents in on the matter, Temly goes missing.

Fela, the third teenager is a pastor’s son struggling to follow his father’s faith. When he discovers some secrets about his father’s occultism, his life is thrown into a tumult. He finds himself in an evil forest with Temly and the two must find a way out or die trying.

Wow! Sounds rather complex and layered. And deep. Just how I like my stories! What was the inspiration for Under a Red Delta Sun?

I always tell people I don’t have a particular form of inspiration except the Holy Spirit. This novel particularly started as just a gem and I started asking my many “what ifs.” The teenagers in the novel inspired me to write more than any other thing I can point to.

Don’t you just love it when the characters run away with the story? It’s fascinating to me how they do that.

Do you have any suggestions to help me become a better writer?

Writing, like many other creative jobs, needs constant training and interaction with other writers. To become a better writer, I would suggest you engage with other writers, attend conferences, and allow other reads influence you.

Great advice. Love it!

How about your process… Do you have a favorite time of day to write? What about a favorite place?

My favorite time to write is in the night when my kids are asleep, and everywhere is quiet. Unlike many writers who may like to play music while writing, I like total silence, and I write best at my desk.

Gotta have some space from the kiddos for sure

Benjamin Franklin Quote

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CRITIQUE IN WRITING: Can you handle the truth?

In life, there are many different types of people…different types of personalities. And, as a leader in various organizations and ministries, I’ve discovered the need for this variety. Especially on your core team.

You need those that I call “The Cheerleaders”. These are your optimists, the glass-is-half-full kind of people. They will walk into a meeting and say “the speaker was great! The music was fabulous! I loved           , and           , and           ! The group seemed engaged! But it was difficult to notice ’cause I was having such a good time!”

But you also need “The Realists”. These are the glass-is-twice-as-big-as-it-needs-to-be folks. “It was good. The speaker did well, but the group started to lose touch near the end, maybe we could limit the speaker’s time by 5-10 minutes next time. The room was a little chilly, so perhaps we bump it up a few degrees too.”

These people are NOT downers (glass-half-empty people). They are VITAL! If we only had Cheerleaders, you would never know what needs to be tweaked for a more optimal experience. You need the folks that have an eye for balance, an eye for feedback and critique. They will help improve the meeting for the group. That is the only way sometimes. Because as the planner, or writer, you can be too close to the work.

Now, there is that third category, “The Downers”, who will find something negative (not constructive) to say about anything and everything. The difference? They don’t offer helpful solutions. There is a general tone of disapproval and an attitude of wanting to tear down the efforts made. These comments/reviews are terribly helpful. You can still learn from them. And I encourage you, in your writing or in your events, to find any nuggets of truth in there, though probably not as extreme as delivered (in most cases), and put the rest out of mind.

Where does critique come from?

As a writer, and in other art forms and most any leadership role, your work is constantly critiqued. But let’s focus on writing. From the time you put pen to paper or keystroke to word processor, your art is subject to someone else’s opinion. Provided that you do, indeed, share it.

The first place it is likely to be seen/shared, is with a critique partner. This is a person (online or in person) you have found who is at your craft level or ahead of you that can look at your work with an outsider’s eye and give you feedback. They are not as close to the work as you are and they can help you find some of those holes that may accidentally find their way into your manuscript. What I mean is that, we writers do a lot in our heads, right? Sometimes we think there is more on the page than is actually there. A crit partner can help us spot where we left something unsaid that we explained “in our head”.

Likewise, a critique group is another wonderful place to get feedback from a variety of writing levels. I would advise you join a group (whether online or in person) that has a least one published author in it. Or else you may be the blind leading the blind. These groups can help you gauge what different types of readers will get from your work: what questions they may have and their reactions–what is funny, what jokes don’t go over, what is intense, etc.

Beta readers, in my opinion, are a must. These are a small group (I would suggest only 3-5 people) that read your entire manuscript to give you content feedback. If you select friends, make sure they are friends who are not “Cheerleaders”, but are more of the “Realist” bent. Definitely a friend that will be honest with you. Or select people that aren’t connected to you at all. As a writer of clean Historical Romance, it is important that I chose my primary beta readers wisely: one has a History degree, one has a literature degree, and one is a freelance editor. They give me mainly feedback on content–plot holes, character development, storylines, etc. Not so much grammar (although they do mark those too)…that is not their primary function.

Then your manuscript needs to have an editor. This is a person who is a professional. In a publishing house, your manuscript will go through three (3) editors: content, line (think primarily grammar), and proofing. Keep in mind, the editor is not out to “get you”, shame you, or hurt you. Their purpose is to make your manuscript, your story shine. To make it as strong as it can be. If you go in with that attitude, you will have a much better experience. Even when an editor really kicked my butt (that manuscript needed it), I thanked her, rolled up my sleeves, and went to work. That book is one of my top selling and highest reviewed works. She was right. Totally right. Everything that she said.

Finally, once your work is out there, you will face reviewers. Now, they will come from all three categories: cheerleaders, realists, and downers. Don’t let any of them get to your head…or your heart. Don’t let the cheerleaders inflate your ego, or the downers break your heart. It is one person’s opinion. If you do read your reviews (and some authors choose to just not), do so to learn from them and make your next book even better.

Bottom line, we need critique. But it is important that we approach it with the right perspective. It is a tool. An opportunity…for growth. For improving our craft.

You can either take advantage of it. Or fight it.

 

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Billy Cox Quote

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