Nate Klemp's Blog, page 2

The Upside of Burnout: How to Turn it From Problem to Opportunity

Originally published in Inc. Magazine.

I'm 40 years old, and I've burned myself out twice so far in my career. In both cases, it was painful, terrifying, and yet life-changing in its positive effects.

The first time happened in my late 20s. I was in the final year of finishing up my PhD. The stress of graduate school combined with a serious bike accident left me drowning in waves of anxiety, depression, and fatigue. The second time happened just recently, in a milder form. It sprung from a combination of stress, long hours, and forgetting to rest. 

Each time it happened, the conventional corporate wisdom of burnout as bad made the whole experience much worse than it needed to be. It's the story that says: burnout is bad. If it happens to you, something is wrong with you: you don't have enough grit, you didn't work out enough, you didn't meditate enough, or you weren't on the right diet, drugs, or supplements. 

With this story in the background, it's no wonder that burning out in the modern world of business feels like a kind of professional death.

Is burnout bad?

When I look closely at my experience of burnout and the experiences of others, a common theme emerges. While painful, burnout can be a catalyst for making the hard decisions that we tend to avoid in our ordinary lives. 

My first burnout experience, for example, gave me the courage to leave a cushy, but uninspiring, career as a professor. It also pushed me to create new habits. I changed my diet and started doing yoga and meditation daily. In the end, it even led me to co-found a new business and co-author a New York Times bestselling book. Without burning out, I would probably still be sitting in faculty committee meetings, bored out of my mind, wishing I had the guts to take a risk. 

When things are going "just fine," after all, we tend to settle. We have a greater tolerance for uninspiring work, relational drama, and living in ways that aren't quite aligned with our highest purpose. But when burnout enters the picture, tolerance is first to go. We don't have enough gas in the tank to deal with the drama and that's often just the motivation we need to make the hard decisions to change.

If you find yourself riding the edge of burnout, here are three strategies you can use to avoid the risks of burning out and experience more of its powerful benefits: 

1. Let go of the illusion of control.

When there's no gas left in the tank, we start to see more clearly a truth about life that was there all along. We see that we have only a small amount of control over the things that matter most: our career, health, thoughts, sensations, and future achievements.

This can be a rather grim realization. But it can also be a catalyst to let go of the steering wheel of life, a move that leads to greater freedom and often, paradoxically, more success and happiness.

2. Question the idea that burnout is bad.

To master burnout, we also have to let go of the conventional wisdom that "burnout is bad." This narrative reinforces feelings of shame, hopelessness, and anxiety. So instead of focusing on the "bad" of burnout, look for the positive transformations it incites. See what happens when you begin to see the corporate world up-side-down, when you live in a world where losing (burning out) is the first step to an even bigger win. 

3. Exercise discriminating wisdom.

Burnout lights the fire of change. But, sometimes, this fire can grow too intense. At times, it can become too intense to handle alone, in which case you need to seek the help of a professional. At other times, the surge of motivation that arises from burnout can lead you to make rash decisions that might not be in your long-term best interest. So it's worth treating major, life-changing, decisions with care.

If you have the thought you should leave your job and move to Bali, for example, sit with it for a while. Give yourself time to make sure any life-changing decisions truly are in your long-term best interest.

We shouldn't seek out the experience of burnout. Nor should we make light of the crippling experience of anxiety, depression, and shame that accompany this state. Burnout can have serious consequences, and it's not to be taken lightly.

The point here is simply this: if you find yourself in the unfortunate situation of burning out, it's important to question the "burnout is bad" story and to remember that this intense emotional journey has the power to positively transform your life and your career.

Why 'Completion Addiction' Might be Your Biggest Barrier to More Productive Work

Originally published in Inc. Magazine.

It's 2 a.m. I'm wide awake. Thoughts about the vendor I need to reply to, the email I forgot to write, and my overflowing inbox spin through my head, pinging me awake like mental smartphone notifications. Finally, I've had enough. I get out of bed and pull out my computer.

I open my inbox: "121 unread messages." 

I spend the next two hours flying through my inbox. It's a blur of calendar invites, Slack messages, emails, and Asana tasks. Two hours later, at 4 a.m., I experience a rush more intoxicating than any drug: a rare moment of "inbox zero." I'm complete. Savoring my email victory, I crawl back into bed to get a couple hours of sleep before starting my day. 

At 8 a.m., I'm back to work, feeling groggy from my midnight email rampage. And then it happens. I open my inbox and my heart sinks: "38 unread messages."

The elation of completion is gone. I'm right back where I started. Only now, I'm operating without two hours of sleep. I'm caught in the cycle of "completion addiction."

Completion addiction.

How often does this happen to you? How many times do you postpone your most important work, so you can get feel the rush of completion -- so you can feel that rare experience of crossing off all your to-dos or working down your inbox to zero?

In my experience, completion addiction destroys productive work, often without us even being aware of it. Completion addiction causes us to obsess over relatively unimportant emails and to-dos. It causes us to put off the tasks that really matter and to race through our work so we end the day feeling stressed, anxious, and exhausted.

What's worse, like any addiction, this behavior is utterly irrational. We're sacrificing our priorities, our sleep, and our well-being -- and for what? For that brief moment of completion? A moment that vanishes in seconds as new messages, requests, and to-dos come flying in?

So, to overcome it, we have to face discomfort head on. Here are a few strategies:

1. Start with what matters.

Instead of starting your day with your email, which as author Brendon Burchard notes is "nothing but a convenient organizing system of other people's agendas," start with what really matters: the report, the presentation, the hard conversation, or the book you've been trying to write for years.

2. Stop responding immediately.

Responsiveness enslaves us to the demands of others. Sure, it feels good to quickly turnaround an email, a text, or a call. But this ephemeral feeling of pleasure comes at a cost: the highest and best use of our time. 

See what happens when you become less responsive. If you ordinarily respond to emails within 30 minutes, try three hours. If you ordinarily respond within three hours, try six.  Then use all the time you save to do the work that really matters.

3. Make friends with incomplete

Now for the most difficult practice. To really cure this pattern, you have to make friends with one of the most uncomfortable mind states of modern life: incompletion. 

The word itself probably conjures up memories of college, where "incomplete" was synonymous with "failing." That's why it feels so edgy and awful to start a weekend or go to sleep with messages overflowing and requests unanswered. 

But see if you can make friends with this state. See if you can resist the urge to hurl yourself at your inbox. See what it's like to go out to dinner with your partner or friends knowing you haven't done it all. It may feel terrible -- it certainly does for me -- but remind yourself that this is the path to freedom.

Of course, some tasks have to be completed, some emails have to be written, some texts have to be sent right away. But many of them don't. The art of overcoming completion addiction is learning how to leave these tasks and messages alone so you can sleep, enjoy a Saturday, or focus your full attention on the work that matters most.

Overwhelmed by Your Inbox? You Might be Experiencing 'Email Apnea'

Originally published in Inc. Magazine.

Have you ever wondered why, after spending hours on email, you feel tense and tight? Why you feel more anxious than before?  Or why, even when do you stop, your mind keeps spinning? 

This is the state that psychologist Linda Stone calls "email apnea."  It's characterized by "shallow breathing or breath holding while doing email, or while working or playing in front of a screen." 

Email apnea occurs for a variety of reasons. First, our posture slumps the moment we pick up our phone or computer, which compromises our ability to inhale and exhale fully. Second, after hours spent staring at our screens, our eyes get fatigued and strained, which further interrupts relaxed breathing. Finally, when we're lost in email and other online tasks, we lose awareness. We become so fixated on texts, emails, and social media posts that we don't even notice this shift in our breathing.

 

So how can we interrupt this daily source of stress and anxiety? Here are 3 tips.

 
1. Keep breathing.

This sounds obvious, and yet the root cause of email apnea is a compromised state of breathing. Our breath gets shorter, shallower, and moves up from the abdomen into the chest. If we can simply notice this shift in breathing, the remedy becomes relatively straightforward. 

All we have to do is begin breathing more deeply into the abdomen while sitting at our computer or using our phone. Try it right now.  As you read the rest of this article, direct a small portion of your attention-- say 10 percent -- to feeling your abdomen expand on the inhale and contract on the exhale.

 
2. Take breaks.

Email apnea is a condition caused by uninterrupted screen fixation. Thus one of the most powerful cures is to build in short breaks every now and then. Get up. Stretch. Move around. 

All you have to do is give your mind and body a short amount of time to experience a more natural state of relaxation. To do this, it can be helpful to set a timer each time you sit down at your computer. You can even schedule these breaks on your calendar if you find yourself forgetting.

 
3. Relax your eyes.

Research on office workers indicates that many of us experience "computer vision syndrome." The hours we spend staring at screens leads to a variety of problems: eye strain, headaches, eye twitching, as well as neck, back, and shoulder strain. Excessive eye strain is also one of the primary forces that holds the breath pattern of email apnea in place. 

To begin relaxing your eyes, it can be helpful to look away from the screen every once in a while. Look out a window and let your eyes relax into a soft gaze. To further interrupt this pattern, you can even experiment with closing your eyes while texting or emailing. 

These tips might sound like a lot of work.  They might seem inefficient.  But consider how much creative and productive energy you lose each day to the breath-holding pattern of email apnea.  Consider what it would be like to finish a long day spent in front of the computer feeling rested and relaxed, rather than exhausted, anxious, and scattered.  

 

Interested in more articles, tips, and strategies on training the skill of resilience? Subscribe to Nate's newsletter.

Experiencing Death by Meeting? Try This 60-Second Technique to Bring Meetings Back to Life

Originally published in Inc. Magazine.

The modern office meeting is broken. We've known this for decades, which is why people say things like "death by meeting," "analysis paralysis," or Apple CEO Tim Cook's truism, "the longer the meeting, the less is accomplished."

And yet, in many organizations, meetings continue to drain energy, creativity, and time. In my own experience, it's become clear to me that the ordinary mindset in most meetings is best described as "not fully there" or, in the words of psychologist Linda Stone, a state of "continuous partial attention."

Just take a look around during your next meeting.

How many people are surreptitiously writing emails, checking Facebook, reading the news, or texting someone? How often is someone asked an important question only to reply, after a marathon-length pause, "Sorry, I was on mute," or "I had trouble hearing you, could you repeat the question?"

There are all sorts of ways to treat this modern meeting dysfunction. It's useful to explore short, 15-minute, daily standups. It's useful to audit and cull the list of regular meetings you attend. But sometimes, there's just no way around it. You need a meeting to talk about an important decision or an important upcoming event.

So how can we make the most of these "have to" meetings? How can we shift the experience from an hour of "checked out" multitasking to an hour of explosively creative work?

 
The 60-Second Arrival

At my company, we've developed a simple 60-second practice that has transformed our experience of meetings. We call it The Arrival.

Here's how it works: At the very beginning of each meeting, instead of diving into the topic at hand, the meeting leader inserts a short, intentional, 60-second pause by saying, "Take the next 60 seconds to do whatever you need to do to be fully present."  Then, they set a timer for--you guessed it--60 seconds. 

It sounds subtle and might strike you as inefficient. But this short pause gives everyone the chance to find their own way to a more present and engaged state. For some, The Arrival is a chance to take a few deep breaths or stretch. For others, The Arrival is an opportunity to send that last text or jot down that to-do they keep forgetting. For everyone, it's a way to clear away distractions and come into the meeting with a radically different, more focused, mindset.

Our company, as well as our client firms that have adopted this practice, have found a significant shift in the quality of our meetings. Our meetings aren't perfect. People still drift into the daze of multitasking from time to time. But we have found that this 60-second pause allows us to get more accomplished, more quickly.

 
Building the Habit

The 60-second arrival practice is like flossing or brushing your teeth. It's only useful if you can build it into a regular, almost automatic, organizational habit.

Use visual cues as reminders. For instance, we have a small laminated card in each of our conference rooms that says "The Arrival" and offers simple instructions on how to do the practice. We also have small, 60-second hourglasses in each conference room that the meeting leader can use to time The Arrival.

When it comes to curing the ills of the modern meeting, this practice can't do everything. It's still essential to explore the number, duration, and structure of the meetings in your workplace.

But by starting each meeting with this brief pause, we can begin to counter one of our most problematic meeting tendencies: the ordinary habit of being physically present but mentally lost in a state of distraction.

 

Interested in more articles, tips, and strategies on training the skill of resilience? Subscribe to Nate's newsletter.