Steve B. Howard's Blog, page 145

Supposedly they edit and proofread, but I sure didn’t see it with my novella.

Supposedly they edit and proofread, but I sure didn’t see it with my novella. It baffles me why a publisher would put out a low-quality book with their name on it. And when I sent the first draft to them why didn’t they just say, “Hey we like what you’ve done, just clean it up and we’ll publish it.” I would have happily paid an editor to fix the typos and grammar issues. Now it’s too late. And there is no way I’m going to pay them thousands of dollars for the rights. I’ve chalked it up to a bad learning experience.

Thanks so much for reading and commenting.

Thanks so much for reading and commenting. I decided to self-publish a collection of short stories recently. Sales have been really slow though. I read that paid marketing doesn’t really work very well until you have 5–10 self-published books out there. I have enough material for 3–4 short story collections and I have a novel that needs a pro edit, but I can have that out by June. I’ll make one of the short story collections permafree and add a cta. Hopefully, that will start generating more sales by next year. It seems like it is an uphill climb whether you self or traditionally publish these days.

Getting My Novella Published Last Year Has Been Like Getting Kicked in the Nuts

“man about to kick woman standing on cliff” by Ashley Jurius on Unsplash

Getting a book published after 13 years of trying and failing to do so should be that “Rocky dancing with arms raised in victory at the top of the steps” moment in every writer’s life right? Well, hold on there sunshine because reality is about to swing its concrete shin MMA style right into your jubilant metaphorical nut sack.

I got serious about writing fiction in 1997. In 1999 I started writing my first novel and completed the first draft two years later. Another year and a half of re-writes and I shakily e-mailed off my first round of query letters to literary agents. Two more years of polite “Thank you, but no thanks” style rejection letters and I mothballed my sad little novel.

“man giving rose to another man” by Alessandro De Bellis on Unsplash

I kept writing short stories though and would occasionally publish a few in small and mid-level literary journals. Then in 2009 after unknowingly joining a cult based on some very dodgy gurus an idea for a novella popped into my head. Imagine “Illusions” by Richard Bach meets “A River Runs Through It” by Norman Mclean meets “Affliction” by Russell Banks and you’ll have a pretty good idea of the major themes that were spinning around my brain at the time.

But I put it off and didn’t start writing it until 2012. It was the story that just wouldn’t go away, so I finally sat down and wrote it. A year later I had a 30k word novella. I anguished a bit about whether or not to try and make it 20–25k words longer since I knew most literary agents wouldn’t want to have anything to do with a novella written by an unknown like myself. I did some research though and found a handful of small publishers that accepted unsolicited submissions for novellas. After a year of major edits, I started sending it out. Another year of rejections followed and then in mid-2015 it happened. There was a massive tremor in the Force and for a brief moment the gatekeepers stepped aside and my little novella was ushered into publishing Valhalla (or so I thought).

Any writer will tell you that receiving your first acceptance letter or e-mail is one of the greatest and most memorial moments of your entire writing career. And though it wasn’t my first acceptance letter it was by far the greatest moment in my writing “career”, and still is actually, though a very tarnished one.

I knew enough to know that this didn’t mean I was going to be the next John Steinbeck. Usually, it takes three or four novels before a writer gets noticed if they ever do. But the fact that my novella was going to be published was a huge boost for me. Over the next year and a half, I wrote a 77k word novel and a 25k word fictionalized memoir. It was one of the rare times for me that the writing just flowed out. Wondering whether or not all the time and effort I put into my writing is worth it has always been a big motivation killer for me, so getting published was a massive boost during that time.

“rocket launched at nighttime” by Bill Jelen on Unsplash

That was nearly three years ago. My novella was released in May 2017, exactly a year ago as I write this. I have to admit the cover is gorgeous, I proud of the title, and I still think it is a great story. If only the editing had lived up to those three things as well.

As soon as I could I ordered a copy. My publisher was supposed to send me 10 copies, but I live in Japan, so I figured it might take them some time to arrive and I couldn’t wait. I received my copy about a two weeks after it was released.

But as I started reading through it I found a lot of typos and errors (over 100) as well as some weird formatting mistakes. I sent them an email immediately with a list of all the mistakes I had found. They apologized, said it was partially due to the printing company, and promised to fix them all. In the meantime I started trying to market my novella as best I could by joining every Facebook group I could find that allowed you to promote your book for free. I was hoping that they would fix all the errors and send out new copies quickly so no one else would have to buy the flawed ones. I sent an e-mail to all my friends and relatives apologizing if they had already bought copies and told those that hadn’t to wait a bit until the new ones were out. At this point, almost all of my earlier elation of being a published author was almost gone. I also had very mixed feelings about promoting my book now that I knew it was full of errors. I was very happy with the overall story though so I decided to push on and see if I could keep selling copies.

I assumed my publishing company was doing the same, but as far as I can tell the only promotions they did was to tweet out my book occasionally to their followers (300 or so at the time) and that was it. I had three times that many followers on my Twitter own account. I suggested several literary journals to them I had published work in the past to contact about writing a review, but as far as I know, they never did.

A few months later I arraigned a reading in the city I live in and asked my publisher to please send me my ten copies so I would have some books to give away and sell. Eventually they sent me 27, but to my horror, all of them had the same errors as the original book. Of course, I had to cancel the reading.

I was also supposed to receive a small advance. I told my publisher they could keep it since I didn’t really need the money that much and I was hoping maybe they would use it for promotions instead. As far as I know they haven’t and don’t seem to plan to either. They were also supposed to provide me with bi-annual sales reports which they have never done. And so far not a dime from them has been transferred to my Pay Pal account even though I know some copies of my novella have sold.

It wasn’t really about the money though. I had just hoped to put a fairly good first novel out there, but instead, other than the cover, it looks as amateurish as any self-published trash novel thrown up on KDP with zero forethought. I imagine it was foolish of me to think that they would do a great job on the editing. At the time I didn’t know that the trend now is for the author to submit a near-perfect manuscript to the publisher even though it costs hundreds of dollars to have it done right. If they would have just said, “Hey, we love the story, but it needs to be cleaned up before we can publish it,” I would have happily paid the money and then re-submitted it.

Worse than that though is the fact that I feel fake now. Being traditionally published was a great source of pride for me and one of the biggest accomplishments in my life. Now it has become a joke and a massive set back. I actually have whole stand up comedy bits I do about it. I thought getting published was going to be a major building block towards my goal of someday earning a living solely from my writing, but I feel like I’m starting from scratch again.

It took Kurt Voneget Jr 25 years and Bukowski 30 to get there, so maybe I’m still ahead of the curve, but it doesn’t feel like it.

If you enjoyed this story check these ones as well.9 Facebook Writing Groups I’m a Member OfWaiting is Part of Publishing Helping each other write better.

Getting My Novella Published Last Year Has Been Like Getting Kicked in the Nuts was originally published in The Writing Cooperative on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Dropped Trust

“female doll in green dress laying on grass field” by Rain Wu on Unsplash“I fake it so real I am beyond fake.” Doll Parts-Hole

Eighteen stories up in the dark. A corner unit with a balcony that faces south. And a long narrow triangle hidden in shadows where the edges of the building meet that I can hang in from my balcony railing and not be seen. My feet dangle in the void and my hands burn as I grip the cold metal railing, but from here I can see.

Two blocks away a wall of lights in the windows of his office. I can see the shadowed figure of him at his desk. He’ll be there long into the night. I was there with him once. A year ago before he decided family was more important than me.

“Mai-chan, we just can’t anymore. You know, my family. I was wrong to start this. I’m sorry.”

He bowed and I bowed back mumbling my own apology and that was it. The last time I was in his office, the final time I spoke to him outside of our formal rigid office interactions.

It’s ridiculous really. Japan is a “look the other way” culture, but the entire office pool knows. I’d go in his office during lunch time and emerge twenty minutes later. We did our best to muffle the moans, but Japanese offices are small and the walls are thin.

And later I learned that office pool knew because I was far from the first to spend my lunch hour with Mr. Ando. No matter how many times I said, “Ando san, not on my skirt, not on my skirt,” I’d always leave his office with the stains.

Now I’m part of the ostrich club, all the girls outed from the OL cliche that eat lunch by themselves in the company cafeteria. I watch his office around lunchtime though, from my desk, all the ostriches do, staying late pretending to work hard, but no new girl lunches with Ando these days. An overheard private phone call by one of the girls confirmed that he is living alone in a tiny bachelor’s apartment near his office.

But hanging here in the dark, my fingers straining, the cold winds wiping through my clothes, I watch the lights and shadows, especially the shadows, in his office. There are no lights on above his office. The OL offices are one floor below his. I know all the girls that stay late. If the lights in the OL office go out and another shadow appears in his office I know what that means. The note is on my kitchen table in my apartment. Even the last stained skirt, though I don’t know if DNA is traceable after a year.

When that shadow appears I’ll drop 18 floors through my shadows to escape.

Dropped Trust was originally published in The Rabbit Is In on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Hypocrisy (haiku-ish)

“woman wearing black tank top” by gabrielle cole on Unsplash

rooting for the underdog
but only if they are already
top dog writers

Uh, thanks. I think, lol. Hope it doesn’t give you colon cancer.

Uh, thanks. I think, lol. Hope it doesn’t give you colon cancer.

Be Your Own Vampire

“woman biting mirror” by Jayson Hinrichsen on Unsplash

If you cut your own throat then at least
have the decency to bleed out with purpose.
The blood that drains easily is always the
coldest.

The scars that form from these wounds
are the same that build the castles you
guard yourself in. Keep the cuts fresh
and flow on the river from your veins.

Invite the night creatures from deep
within to flood your day with their
darkness. Doing battle with those
are your greatest engines for growth.

Be Your Own Vampire was originally published in P.S. I Love You on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

Oldies, But Goodies II: More Unloved Orphan Stories and Poems

Steve B Howard 2018

A second list of some of my writing that I think deserves a second look. Hope you all enjoy it and thanks everyone for reading, commenting and clapping for my stuff. That really keeps me going as a writer. And check out the other writers in these Medium publications as well. All of them are very talented.

Aspiration, Obsession, DisintegrationFly Fishing Out of a Dead End LifeStellar Love Songs

Thank you. It seems like it is getting a lot more reads and claps this time.

Thank you. It seems like it is getting a lot more reads and claps this time.

I’ve been taking older stories and submitting them to publications that accept previously published…

I’ve been taking older stories and submitting them to publications that accept previously published work to try and get them a little more attention.