Michael Lee Stallard's Blog, page 20

Leading with Character: Social Intelligence

Social intelligence is being aware of your own motives as well as the feelings of others, knowing what to do to fit into different social situations, and knowing what makes other people tick.

Social Intelligence in Leadership

Oftentimes people are promoted into leadership positions because they’ve been successful as individual contributors. What makes them successful in an individual role, however, may be insufficient to ensure their success as a leader. Social intelligence is one of the most important character strengths to determine the success of leaders because leading is social in nature. Through his or her interactions with others, leaders must motivate people to give their best efforts and align their behavior with organizational goals.

Research from the field of neuroscience confirms the importance of social intelligence. In recent years, neuroscientists discovered the existence of mirror neurons. These brain cells have been described as an emotional wi-fi system that detects and reproduces the emotions of others. In other words, mirror neurons allow us to feel what others feel, a state described as “mutual empathy.” The existence of mirror neurons also means that emotions truly are contagious. The emotions of the people around us affect our own, in a positive or negative way.

Given this, leaders should be sensitive to the emotions of others. People feel connected and are more likely to trust leaders who understand them and feel as they do. Leaders also need to be intentional about managing their emotions because of how emotions spread to others. It’s important for leaders to be optimistic, confident, friendly and approachable.

Good leaders know how to be inclusive. When people feel excluded it triggers “social pain,” i.e. feelings of exclusion that activate the part of the human brain that feels physical pain. People feeling social pain either withdraw from a group or take action to sabotage it, whereas people who feel included are more likely to experience positive emotions that energize them.

A socially intelligent leader avoids behaviors that bring out negative emotions in others. Such behaviors include needing to win at all costs, adding one’s opinion to every discussion, always showing others how smart one is, and sarcasm or putting others down.

Examples of Social Intelligence in Action

When A.G. Lafley became CEO of Procter and Gamble in 2000, he followed a CEO who was negative, pessimistic and lacked humility. Under the former leader, the company had lost $320 million the previous quarter, half its brands were losing market share, and the firm was struggling with morale problems. The more socially intelligent Lafley was a breath of fresh air. Rather than berating people, he asked them to get the “moose” (i.e. the problems they’d been afraid to make public) out of the closets and onto the conference room tables where together they would solve them. The upbeat and optimistic Lafley calmly asked people for their opinions and ideas, considered them and put into practice those he thought were best. This reflects social intelligence in that people respond better to a respectful tone of voice and being invited to problem solve versus an authoritarian tone of voice and being lectured. Result: After implementing employee suggestions, the number of employees who agreed with the statement, “we’re on track to deliver business results” soared from 18 percent to 49 percent in 12 months. In a little more than two years after Lafley became CEO, the company was so profitable its stock price had risen 70 percent!

As president of the Red Cross, Elizabeth Dole would say that “wanting to do good was not good enough” and that the organization had to produce results. She was well known for remembering people’s names and what they were passionate about in life. In interacting with others, she used their names, asked them about their interests and vicariously felt the emotions they expressed. When it came to fundraising for the Red Cross, Dole was intentional about connecting. She had her staff research people to identify an important fact about them that she would use in conversations with them. Result:Elizabeth Dole connected with Red Cross staff, volunteers, and donors and produced results. During her tenure, she greatly increased financial support, successfully implemented a massive change initiative to ensure the safety of the Red Cross blood supply, and expanded its network of trained disaster relief workers.

Actions You Can Take to Develop Social Intelligence Among Your Team

Make quick connections with new acquaintances. If you are meeting an individual for the first time, develop the habit of using his or her name several times in the conversation so that you will be more likely to remember it. Another way to remember names is to think of someone else you know who has the same first name as that individual. Connections with others are strengthened when you discover shared interests and experiences. To do this, ask a question such as “what are your interests outside of work?”

Practice active listening. Listen carefully and be present in conversations. When you speak with others, maintain eye contact and don’t get distracted by averting your gaze, daydreaming, or checking your email or telephone. During conversations, pay close attention to what is said, actively ask questions and write down any items you need to remember or follow up on.

Don’t suppress empathy. Mutual empathy is a powerful connector. If an individual you’re interacting with expresses emotion, and it’s appropriate, allow yourself to feel the emotion rather than suppressing it. For example, if the individual shows enthusiasm, try to feel it. If the individual is sad, it’s ok to feel his or her sadness. Feeling another’s pain often reduces it and helps the person feel better.

Seek opportunities to encourage and help others. When you encourage and help others, it connects with them. When someone does something well, tell him or her in person that you appreciate the excellence of his or her work. Develop the habit of always looking for ways to encourage and help people then follow through on any actions you commit to do.

When you feel fear or anger, take time to slow down and reflect. Fear and anger trigger fight or flight responses that have a higher probability of being rash than rational.  When you feel fear or anger, pause to take a deep breath and count to 10 so that you have time to relax and reflect before reacting. If you continue to feel fear or anger, consider taking a break from the person or situation. When you respond, avoid increasing the stress by preferring “I” over “you” in your response. For example, it’s preferable to say “I’m upset that you didn’t help with that extra work that had to be done” than “you never help when extra work has to be done.”

Assume the best in others. When someone says or does something disconnecting in his or her interactions with you, give the benefit of the doubt that he or she didn’t intend harm or ill-will. Forgiveness and mercy (i.e. accepting the shortcomings of others, giving people a second chance, and not being vengeful) are character strengths, too!

Model it and coach your team. To strengthen social intelligence among the people you lead you must model it so that others will observe and emulate what you do. Some of those you lead may require coaching. If you see someone doing something that is socially unintelligent (i.e. relationally disconnecting), take time to speak with him or her in private. When you do, be sure to encourage the person first then communicate your concern by saying “you would be even better if you ________” [fill in the blank with what they could have done better]. When providing constructive feedback, strive to be gentle and kind in your tone of voice so the other person is less likely to become defensive.

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Why Edward Jones is Built to Last

What makes an organization sufficiently resilient to survive over a sustained period of time?

In 1983 Royal Dutch/Shell Group studied 27 companies that had survived more than 100 years, were still important in their industries, and continued to have strong corporate identities.

One key finding was that leaders of these organizations believed it was important to leave their organizations in as good as or better shape than when they became leaders. These leaders also put a higher priority on people than on assets. Keeping the community of people who worked at the organization together was more significant to them than the type of work they did. In fact, each of the 27 companies had changed its business portfolio at least once. For example, the chemical company DuPont began as a gunpowder company, and Mitsui of Japan began as a drapery shop before it moved successively into banking, mining, and manufacturing.

Effectively, these leaders thought of themselves as trustees or stewards who had a responsibility to the current and future members of their work communities. The study’s author wrote that the “case histories repeatedly show that a sense of community is essential for long-term survival.”

Different DNA Than Wall Street

I was reminded of this people-oriented leadership mindset when I recently spoke with Jim Weddle, Managing Partner of Edward Jones, a brokerage firm with 14,000 financial advisors who are solely focused on helping individual investors.

Caring about people is in Edward Jones’ cultural DNA and has been from the start. Based in St. Louis, Missouri, the firm was founded in 1922 by Edward D. Jones, Sr. Having left his employer because he didn’t feel respected or appreciated, Jones wanted to start a firm where people were treated well, where the interests of the clients served always came first, and where those who were doing the work were appreciated and received fair financial rewards.

This people-oriented mindset has continued to be a guiding light for the leadership of Edward Jones and it is why the firm has consistently been recognized for outstanding client service by J.D. Power & Associates and was most recently ranked 6th in the 2015 Fortune magazine “100 Best Companies to Work For” list.

Jim Weddle began working at Edward Jones in 1976 as a part-time intern while he was still a student at Washington University in St. Louis. He has spent his entire career with the firm and he recently celebrated his 10th year as Managing Partner, only the fifth man to hold that senior position in the firm’s history. While speaking with Weddle, I could sense his pride in being part of Edward Jones and his sense of responsibility to make it even better. He is certainly doing that. Over Weddle’s tenure as managing partner, revenue has increased by 102%, the number of financial advisors has risen by 47% and total assets under management has increased by 114%.

Like other leaders of enduring organizations, Weddle sees Jones’ culture as a real differentiator, especially versus many other Wall Street firms. He thinks of culture in terms of relationships, including relationships among the people who work at Jones and relationships with the firm’s clients.

Weddle and the leadership team at Edward Jones walk the talk. During the 2008-2009 recession when most Wall Street firms made dramatic cuts in personnel, Edward Jones instead chose to freeze salaries and other expenses so that no one was laid off. It was a moment of truth that reinforced the firm’s values and spoke volumes about how much the firm’s leadership prioritizes people over short-term financial gain.

All for One, One for All

In many organizations, individuals who have the most power, control, influence and status feel engaged and those who have little influence just show up for the paycheck and go through the motions. Psychology research has identified the state the low power people experience as “learned helplessness,” the presence of which undermines an organization’s performance. Jim Weddle and the Edward Jones leadership team are sensitive to cultivating an inclusive culture where everyone is part of the team, all can make a difference and none feel left out.

Every Edward Jones branch has a branch office administrator who provides support to the financial advisor in the branch. In Weddle’s first year of becoming managing partner, he could see that branch office administrators were underappreciated and underpaid relative to their contributions. To address the issue and despite the significant additional cost, Weddle created a new bonus program to provide additional financial rewards to the more than 14,500 branch office administrators.

Not a Zero Sum Game

Weddle has made other improvements to Edward Jones that reflect his determination to see that clients are served well. The firm hired an independent firm to regularly survey clients and report client satisfaction feedback in the form of a client experience index. Most brokers on Wall Street would be up in arms if a third-party communicated directly with clients about their performance and reported it back to the firm so it requires some humility on the part of Edward Jones financial advisors to acquiesce to this practice.

The client experience index gives Edward Jones’ clients a voice and holds financial advisors accountable to provide the highest levels of service and performance. It provides a more balanced assessment of a financial advisors performance than gross revenue production alone, which is the standard at most firms on Wall Street.

Wall Street is not known for work cultures that care about people. This reputation, reinforced in the movies, is often deserved. Fortunately, there are exceptions and Edward Jones is a notable one.

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4 Reasons to Lead with Questions

Most organization and team cultures today focus on racing to identify actionable solutions. The most effective leaders, however, take time to ask questions that get people to share their thoughts and feelings en route to identifying actionable solutions.

Over the years I’ve come to believe that rushing to a solution is often unwise and that the journey is as valuable as the destination. Here are four reasons why.

Talking builds trust

Research by psychologist James Pennebaker has shown that when you get people to talk, they feel more connected to you, they like you more and feel they learn more from you. In other words, by getting people to talk and carefully listening to them you build trust.

Talking defangs destructive emotions

Asking questions and listening helps quiet destructive emotions. One reason hostage negotiators are 95 percent successful is that they ask hostage takers questions that engage the cortex of the brain, where we make rational decisions, and disengage the amygdala, an emotional region of the brain, thus overcoming the amygdala hijack

Talking facilitates alignment

Asking questions and carefully listening to responses helps people learn and grow. Lawyers who specialize in contract law talk about “meeting of the minds.” I like this phrase because it correctly identifies that minds can meet, partially meet or utterly fail to meet. The process of asking questions, carefully listening to responses and asking additional questions helps facilitate a meeting of the minds that promotes alignment of actions so that the team is all moving in the same direction.

Talking Improves Engagement

Over my career I’ve witnessed time and again how people who are ordered to implement a set of actions do so with little commitment and effort. Leaders who involve people in the conversation to identify and finalize actions are rewarded when people implement the actions with greater engagement.

What Questions Should You Ask?

Several resources are available to help those who want to lead with questions. Michael Bungay Stanier’s new book, The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever is a good place to begin. It recommends questions to use in the context of coaching and mentoring including:

What’s on your mind?

And what else?

What’s the real challenge here for you?

What do you want?

How can I help?

Another worthwhile resource is Peter Drucker’s 5 Most Important Questions by Peter Drucker, Frances Hesselbein and Joan Snyder Kuhl. Drucker’s questions are as follows:

What is our mission?

Who is our customer?

What does the customer value?

What are our results?

What is our plan?

Finally, StoryCorps, the nonprofit organization that has recorded more than 60,000 interviews with more than 100,000 participants, has learned a thing our two about effective questions. Check out Great Questions from StoryCorps and consider using some of them with your team, friends and family.

If you doubt the power of leading with questions and the importance of sociality, check out the 36 questions that lead to love and this article on Google’s Project Aristotle.

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4 Ways “Connection Culture” Improves Risk Management

In recent years, organizational culture has been cited as a reason for managerial failures at organizations including General Motors, NASA, Nokia, and Volkswagen. Recently, I was asked if Connection Cultures reduce risks faced by organizations. The answer is “yes.” Below are four reasons why.

Connection Reduces Accident Risk

When you think about the five performance advantages Connection Cultures have, it’s not difficult to see how they would improve an organization’s safety record. After all, people in a Connection Culture have superior cognitive function and are more communicative, collaborative and cooperative and, as a result, are going to be less accident prone. Research supports this view. In 2012, Gallup researched 49,929 business or work units comprised of 1.4 million employees within 192 organizations across 34 nations. Compared to business units with engagement/connection scores in the bottom 25 percent, business units in the top 25 percent had 48 percent fewer safety accidents.

Connection Reduces Liability Risk

The Gallup research cited above also found that compared to business units with engagement/connection scores in the bottom 25 percent, business units in the top 25 percent had 41 percent fewer quality incidents. Quality failures can lead to liability lawsuits and in extreme cases threaten an organization’s survival.

Connection Reduces Reputational Risk

Becky Powell-Schwartz, a crisis communications expert at The Powell Group in Dallas, Texas, has helped me see how Connection Cultures reduce an organization’s reputational risk. This is the case because individuals who feel connected to an organization are more likely to risk speaking up when they observe potential threats to their organization’s reputation. The sooner leaders become aware of an emerging threat, the more time they have to take actions to avoid it or to mitigate damage. A case in point is the recent discovery of Volkswagen intentionally programming diesel cars sold in the U.S. to under-report pollution. Volkswagen’s senior management has said they were unaware of the misconduct. If true, a Connection Culture would have made it more likely that an employee would have brought the misconduct to senior management’s attention when there may have been sufficient time to correct the improper behavior.

Connection Reduces Obsolescence Risk

In Only the Paranoid Survive, former Intel CEO Andrew Grove describes how several people at Intel fed him information that helped him see that Intel’s Japanese competitors had far superior quality in semiconductor memory devices.  Armed with this knowledge, Grove made the decision to exit the memory business and focus instead on microprocessors. As a result of the decision, Intel’s revenue eventually surpassed the revenues of its next three competitors combined. Employees in organizations where they feel connected are more likely to speak up and become what Andrew Grove described as “helpful Cassandras” (Cassandra was the priestess in Greek mythology who foretold the fall of Troy).

In summary, if your organization creates and maintains a Connection Culture, it will reduce risk and see fewer accidents, fewer quality incidents that could result in legal liability, fewer incidents that could result in reputational harm and a lower likelihood of damage from changing competitive conditions.

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Image courtesy of Flickr user Nell Tackaberry under Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 2.0 Generic. Image has been cropped.

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4 Ways to Help You “Never Give Up”

A number of leaders I know are beginning 2016 facing extremely challenging business and/or personal situations. I want to encourage them to keep moving forward because I believe their greatest contributions are yet to come. Here are four pieces of advice to help.

1. Consider your comeback story

If the present outlook appears grim, think of it as a chapter in your comeback story.

On the 2nd of January, Bram Kohlhausen had reason to be concerned. TCU’s backup quarterback, who had seen limited playing time during the regular season, had been tapped to be the starter on two days’ notice as TCU prepared to take on Oregon in the Alamo Bowl. It was both the first start of his college football career and his final college football game as a player. Kohlhausen was trying to lead a TCU team beset with injuries all season and short its two best offensive players. Adding to the weight he carried, Kohlhausen lost his father to cancer just two months earlier. Uncharacteristically, TCU did not score a single point in the first half and the team headed to the locker room down 31-0 against its Pac-12 opponent.

The second half of the game belonged to TCU. Late in the second quarter, Oregon’s star quarterback was injured and he did not return to the game after halftime. While TCU’s defense stopped the Oregon offense, Kohlhausen sparked the TCU offense by throwing for 351 yards and running for 43 yards, which in combination led to four touchdowns. This time it was Oregon that did not score a single point. TCU’s 31 points tied the game and sent it to overtime. In the end, TCU completed a 47-41 comeback in triple overtime, tying Texas Tech for the largest comeback in college football bowl game history. Kohlhausen was selected as the game’s offensive MVP and named to the Associated Press All-Bowl Team. This goes to show if you hang in there through times of adversity, opportunities may arise.

Many leaders face trying times en route to victory. Steve Jobs led a struggling Apple and had to seek financing from his rival, Bill Gates. Apple barely survived yet went on to become the largest company in terms of stock market value, one of the most respected companies and the number one brand worldwide.

President Abraham Lincoln struggled with periods of depression when the Civil War wasn’t going well, a son had died and his wife was not well. He went on to see the Union Army triumph.

When you keep moving forward, step by step, and maintain the perspective that current struggles are part of your comeback story, you’ll often see things turn around.

2. Talk it over with friends

Never worry alone. Seek help when you’re struggling. Talking through things with trusted friends and colleagues helps us cope with anxiety and stress, and often leads to new insights about adjustments we can make to improve our effectiveness. Most Saturday mornings, I meet with a group of guys in a Bible study and each of us shares the ups and downs we experienced that week. The time I spend with them always energizes me. In addition, I frequently seek the help of friends who have expertise in areas I don’t know well.

3. Count your blessings

Take time each day to reflect on a list of good things in your life. It helps you keep a positive perspective. I like to reflect on how grateful I am for my wife and daughters, my mother and my extended family, and wonderful friends. This always perks me up when I’m feeling weighed down.

4. Take time to care for yourself

Finally, I’ve learned that I need to be intentional about caring for my health by eating right, getting enough sleep and exercise, and taking at least a day off each week to recharge. When most of my time is focused on work, it’s easy for me to ignore this need and let my health suffer. Self-neglect, however, reflects short-term thinking and will sabotage your efforts to persevere.

In summary, when you’re facing challenging times, consider your comeback story, talk the situation over with friends, count your blessings and take time to care for yourself so you can go the distance.

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America’s Stress Epidemic

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America’s Stress Epidemic

Stress is increasing today as the world economy becomes more competitive and the explosion of information overwhelms individuals. The effects are felt not just mentally, but throughout our nervous systems.

Human connection in the form of conversation and relational support provides psychological resources to cope with stress. Unfortunately, people have fewer confidants today as single-person households in America are at an all-time high of 28 percent, families have spread out, workplaces are lonelier, and both work hours and commutes are longer. Add to that the allure of media and smartphones, and you have a recipe for less time spent in meaningful face-to-face conversation, a state that contributes to greater anxiety, depression and addiction.

Hardwired to Connect

We are hardwired to connect. When our lives crowd out time connecting with others we dysfunction. As the neuroscientist Matthew Lieberman said in his TED Talk, connection is a superpower that makes people more productive, healthier and happier. To reverse these ominous trends we need to dial back our achieve-aholic tendencies obsessively to pursue wealth, power, and fame, and spend more time and energy connecting with others in supportive relationships.

Interestingly, Millennials are trying to do just that in response to seeing their Boomer parents’ struggles. When global marketing firm McCann Worldgroup surveyed 1,000 individuals in the U.S. between the ages of 16-30 years old in 2011, it found more than 90 percent of those surveyed rated “connection and community” as their greatest need. As the researchers put it, “to truly grasp the power of connection for this generation, we can look at how they wish to be remembered. It is not for their beauty, their power, or their influence, but simply for the quality of their human relationships and their ability to look after those around them.” Although Millennials long to connect, they are becoming increasingly frustrated in meeting that desire, in part because of addictions to smartphones and other media.

Connection in the Workplace

Employers can make a difference by recognizing that people are coming to work with a connection deficit. Organizations that have relationally toxic or indifferent cultures exacerbate the situation. In many workplaces, anyone who takes lunch away from his desk is labeled as a slacker. Companies that are hell-bent on growth at any cost are harming their employees and their own organization’s performance.

Wise leaders not only value task excellence, they value relationship excellence. Both are necessary for an organization to thrive. Employees who experience sufficient connection, 1) perform better cognitively and physically, 2) give greater discretionary effort, 3) are more aligned with organizational goals, 4) communicate more so that decision-makers have better information and that improves the quality of decision-making, and 5) engage in creative conversations that fuel innovation.  These five benefits add up to a powerful competitive advantage that comes from having a culture of connection in the workplace.

Leaders can create cultures of connection by communicating an inspiring vision that unites, valuing people as human beings rather than means to an end, and giving people a voice in decisions that affect them. I recommend leaders focus on shaping the culture–the attitudes, uses of language, and behaviors of the people–to be one that promotes and enhances healthy and collaborative relationships.

Today, more than two-thirds of workers in America report they do not feel connected at work.  Changing workplace cultures in ways that boost connection will not only improve America’s productivity, it will also provide psychological resources to cope with the rising stress of modern life thereby improving the employee’s health, happiness and longevity.

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The post America’s Stress Epidemic appeared first on Michael Lee Stallard.

Leadership Insights of a Hostage Negotiator

Imagine you are a hostage negotiator sent into a hospital to speak with a man named Sam who is holding a pair of scissors at the throat of a nurse. You know from your briefing that Sam had been seriously injured from a stab wound inflicted by his wife during an argument over the custody of their children. Upon entering the room, you find Sam screaming and yelling that he is going to kill everyone.

What would you do?

When rookie hostage negotiator George Kohlreiser found himself in this situation, he calmly asked, “What do you need, Sam? What do you want?”

To focus Sam’s mind on what was important to him, George asked, “What about your children, Sam?” Sam replied, “Don’t talk about my children. Bring them here and I will kill them, too.” Despite the threat, George was encouraged that Sam had answered. Then Sam pointed the scissors at George’s throat and moved toward him.

As Sam approached, George placed his hands onto Sam’s arms and began asking him “Do you want [your children] to remember you as a murderer?” Sam paused.  George had found a way to connect. “We have to talk about your kids. How do you want them to remember you?”

George continued asking questions that Sam answered and Sam calmed down.  In negotiating the nurse’s release, George kept the dialogue going. He asked Sam if he still needed the scissors. Would he prefer to throw the scissors on the floor or hand them to George? He asked Sam if he would prefer for George to handcuff him or have the police do it.  Would he prefer to be handcuffed in the front or back? Sam wanted to be handcuffed in the front and for George to do it. As they walked out of the hospital together, Sam thanked George for reminding him how important his children were to him.

Connecting Personally and with Goals

Hostage negotiators like George Kohlrieser are successful 95% of the time.

The secret to George’s success, and the success of hostage negotiators in general, is that he learned how to connect with people and connect with a common goal. He asked questions and empathized with hostage takers in order to restore a sense of peace, identify a common goal and take steps to achieve the common goal.

The benefits of human connection have been identified in the fields of social psychology, attachment psychology, social network analysis and cognitive neuroscience. In his TED Talk, neuroscientist Matthew Lieberman described human connection is a superpower because it makes people healthier, happier and more productive.

Research has found that connection engages the cortex, the part of the brain where we make rational decisions, while quieting the emotional brain where there is a higher probability of making a rash decision.  Connection also reduces feelings of anxiety and stress.

Care to Dare

George Kohlrieser went on to become a professor of leadership and organizational behavior, and the creator and director of the High Performance Leadership Program at IMD business school in Switzerland. Insights from George’s experience as a hostage negotiator informed his approach to leadership which he describes in an excellent book titled Care to Dare: Unleashing Astonishing Potential Through Secure Based Leadership.

In a nutshell, care to dare is a leadership approach with two parts. First, it focuses on developing a leader’s ability to connect with the people he or she leads to create feelings of safety and security. The second part focuses on developing a leader’s ability to connect people to a shared mission that provides a meaningful challenge the group aspires to achieve.

Virgin’s founder Richard Branson is an example George cites of a leader who takes a care to dare approach. Branson exhibited caring when Virgin acquired Northern Rock, a U.K.-based financial services institution. He sent a personal letter to each Northern Rock employee along with a copy of his autobiography then rode his motorcycle to every Northern Rock branch to personally meet employees. Branson exhibited daring by challenging employees to take Virgin to the next frontier by transforming the organization into one where “doing good really is good for business.”

Application: How good are you at connecting with the people you lead and daring them to achieve shared objectives? If you need to improve your connection skills, identify someone in your organization whom you trust and who is good at connecting then ask him or her to mentor you. You might also read George Kohlreiser’s Care to Dare and download the free e-book 100 Ways to Connect. If you need to improve your ability to create shared objectives and challenge the people you lead to achieve them, identify a mentor or coach who can help you develop that skill.

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Developing the Resilience to Persevere and Excel

Lessons from Kirk Cousins

Leaders must be resilient if they are going to prevail in the face of inevitable challenges. One of the most interesting examples of resilience today comes from the world of sports where Kirk Cousins, a Washington Redskins quarterback who has been consistently underestimated, is helping lead the turnaround of a team that has had only one winning season over the last seven years.

Since naming Cousins the starting quarterback this season, the Redskins have won five home games and seen an uptick in energy and expectations. The recent win over the New York Giants moved the Redskins into a tie for first place in the NFC East.

Drafted by the Redskins in 2012, along with fellow rookie quarterback Robert Griffin III, most of the media dismissed Cousins as destined to be a NFL backup quarterback. Adding insult to injury, photos of Cousins appearing in the media frequently portrayed him as a lightweight. One photo consistently used showed Cousins with a goofy grin as he sat next to starting quarterback Robert Griffin III.  Another was of Cousins driving his grandmother’s minivan to Redskins’ practice. A closer look at Cousins, however, shows he is anything but a goof.

After playing football for a small Christian high school in Holland, Michigan, Cousins’ only Division I scholarship offer came last minute from Michigan State coach Mark Dantonio.  By the time of Cousins’ sophomore year, he was a team captain and became the first three-time Michigan State captain since the 1940’s. His hard work as a student earned him Academic All-Big Ten honors four years in a row.

Cousins was nominated to represent the players of the Big Ten at the conference’s annual media day at the start of his senior year. Pete Thamel of The New York Times attended the event and wrote that Cousins turned the largely predictable media day into an “internet sensation” by delivering a self-deprecating and inspiring speech about the privilege of playing in the Big Ten and the responsibilities that go along with it. Cousins received a standing ovation, the YouTube video went viral, and several Big Ten coaches wrote him personal notes to express their admiration.

To top it all off, Cousins has already written a thoughtful book titled Game Changer: Faith, Football and Finding Your Way. That’s quite an impressive record for a 27-year old.

Captain Kirk

Cousins has been called “Captain Kirk,” a nod to the iconic leader on the long-running television show “Star Trek.” Like the captain of the starship U.S.S. Enterprise, Cousins finds ways to succeed when objective evidence would suggest there is little hope of success.  For example, earlier this season when the Redskins were down 24-0 to Tampa Bay, Cousins rallied the team to the largest comeback in Redskins franchise history.

How does he do it?

The obvious answer is his competence and skill as an athlete and quarterback. Although Cousins has had limited experience in NFL games prior to this season, he’s getting plenty of playing time now and the results are evident.  So far this season he was twice named NFC Offensive Player of the Week.

The less obvious reason for Cousins’ success is the relationship support he has. Attachment Theory from the field of psychology has clearly shown that people need close, supportive relationships to develop, to comfort and to encourage them during life’s storms. Strong supportive relationships have even been shown to release the telomerase enzyme, which heals the damage that stress causes to chromosomes. In the absence of supportive relationships, adversity and stress make people more vulnerable to anxiety, depression and addiction.

Cousins has made it through plenty of stress and adversity over the course of his career. Presently, Cousins faces challenges such as the pressure to perform, leading the Redskins and concern for his father, Don Cousins, a minister in Orlando who is undergoing treatment for cancer. The two are especially close and his father continues to mentor him on spiritual and leadership matters.

Team Cousins

Cheering Kirk Cousins on, both on and off the field, are his wife, parents, siblings, extended family and friends. This close group provides the support he needs to take risks and to strive to accomplish great things. In addition, Cousins, like many other current NFL quarterbacks, has a strong faith in God. Psychology research shows this relationship also makes people more resilient.

Kirk Cousins becomes a free agent in March. It’s going to be interesting to see what the future holds for him. Based on his rapid development with additional playing time, strong supportive relationships and his faith, I’d say Cousins’ future is bright. The Washington Redskins’ future will likely be bright too if they bet on Captain Kirk.

Application: Do you have confidants with whom you regularly converse about the ups and downs you experience each week and who encourage you through challenging times? If not, identify individuals you want to intentionally develop a relationship with, reach out to get to know them, and look for ways you can help them. Find times to regularly get together with them to learn what’s going on in their lives and share what’s going on yours.

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Image courtesy of Wikimedia user Keith Allison under CC  Attribution-Share Alike 2.0 Generic license. Image has been cropped. 

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Will Aetna CEO Transform Healthcare (and CEO Leadership While He’s at it)?

At the 2015 World Business Forum in New York City, Aetna CEO Mark Bertolini laid out the most important vision at the conference: a vision to save healthcare.

Bertolini’s message is that healthcare is broken and that he is committed to fixing it. Although his vision will be difficult to achieve, his resolve and thoughtfulness is evident.

He knows fixing healthcare is important. He knows it will have a positive effect on the length and quality of lives of millions of Americans.

Bertolini’s dedication to the cause of reforming healthcare and actions as CEO make him a clear example of a servant leader.

Servant Leadership Defined

The term “servant leadership” has been around since Robert Greenleaf coined it in 1970. Many leaders I’ve spoken with about servant leadership struggle with the word “servant” because of its link to Jesus’ words  “I came not to be served but to serve” and to the subservient nature of a slave.

Despite these concerns, I still find servant leader is an accurate description of the great leaders I’ve known and studied. These leaders serve a cause just as Mark Bertolini serves the cause of changing healthcare. Furthermore, they think of themselves and behave in ways that serve the people they are responsible for leading.

My friend Frances Hesselbein, chairman of the Frances Hesselbein Leadership Institute, once told me “to serve is to live” (now it’s her Twitter handle). There is a great deal of wisdom in this phrase.  Leaders who serve benefit from “helpers high,” an emotional state that research has found makes people healthier, stronger and more energetic. Leaders who serve also connect with the people they serve which leads to greater employee and customer engagement.

In short, a leader who serves a cause that serves others and who serves the people who serve the cause will be more effective that a leader who serves him or herself.

Mark Bertolini is a wonderful illustration of this point.

Serving a Cause Greater than Themselves

Two experiences Bertolini had helped him develop greater empathy for people experiencing life-threatening healthcare problems. In 2001, Bertolini’s son was diagnosed with incurable lymphoma. Bertolini took time off from work and moved into his son’s hospital room. Today, his son is alive, well, and working in Boston.

In 2004, Bertolini was seriously injured in a ski accident that fractured his neck in five places and left him struggling to recover his health. The painkillers doctors gave him dulled his mental acuity and diminished his ability to work. He gave them up for alternative medicines. Although he still experiences neuropathy in his left arm, he manages the pain with yoga and acupuncture.

Walking the journey of patients and their family members shaped Bertolini so that he has a passion and drive to reform healthcare. His vision is based on making individuals productive rather than on eliminating disease, as has historically has been the focus of healthcare. This mindset has also influenced how he leads people who work at Aetna.

Serving Those Who Serve the Cause

Bertolini appreciates people who work in healthcare. For a season, he worked as a paramedic in his native Detroit.

When Bertolini was out meeting people who worked on the frontlines of Aetna, he frequently heard people say it was difficult for them to afford the insurance Aetna offered. Bertolini asked human resources to look into it. When it was reported back that the employees’ comments were true, Bertolini took action. Earlier this year, he raised the Aetna minimum wage from $12 to $16 an hour.

Mark Bertolini is a CEO to watch. His mindset of serving the cause and serving those who serve the cause could very well make Aetna a catalyst for positive change in healthcare.

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Americans Struggling with Stress and Loneliness

The media is abuzz about the declining life span of middle-aged, white adults in the U.S. from drug and alcohol poisonings, suicide, and chronic liver diseases and cirrhosis. I’m not surprised. One explanation is the rise in loneliness.

Stress is increasing today as the world economy becomes more competitive and the explosion of information overwhelms individuals. The effects are felt not just mentally, but throughout their nervous systems.

Human connection in the form of conversation and relational support provides psychological resources to cope with stress.  Unfortunately, people have fewer confidants today as single-person households in America are at an all-time high of 28 percent, families have spread out, workplaces are lonelier, and both work hours and commutes are longer. Add to that the allure of media and smartphones, and you have a recipe for less time spent in meaningful face-to-face conversation, a state that contributes to greater anxiety, depression and addiction.

Hardwired to Connect

We are hardwired to connect. When our lives crowd out time connecting with others, we dysfunction. As the neuroscientist Matthew Lieberman said in his TED Talk, connection is a superpower that makes people more productive, healthier and happier. To reverse these ominous trends we need to dial back our achieve-aholic tendencies to pursue wealth, power, and fame, and spend more time and energy connecting with others in supportive relationships.

Interestingly, Millennials are trying to do just that in response to seeing their Boomer parents’ struggles. When global marketing firm McCann Worldgroup surveyed 1,000 individuals in the U.S. between the ages of 16-30 years old in 2001, it found more than 90 percent of those surveyed rated “connection and community” as their greatest need. As the researchers put it, “to truly grasp the power of connection for this generation, we can look at how they wish to be remembered. It is not for their beauty, their power, or their influence, but simply for the quality of their human relationships and their ability to look after those around them.” Although Millennials long to connect, they are becoming increasingly frustrated in meeting that desire, in part because of addictions to smartphones and other media.

Connection in the Workplace

Employers can make a difference, too, by recognizing that people are coming to work with a connection deficit. Organizations that have relationally toxic or indifferent cultures exacerbate the situation. In many workplaces, anyone who takes lunch away from his desk is labeled as a slacker. Companies that are hell-bent on growth at any cost are harming their employees and their own organization’s performance.

Wise leaders not only value task excellence, they also value relationship excellence. Both are necessary for an organization to thrive. Employees who experience sufficient connection, 1) perform better cognitively and physically, 2) give greater discretionary effort, 3) are more aligned with organizational goals, 4) communicate more so that decision-makers have better information, which improves the quality of decision-making, and 5) engage in creative conversations that fuel innovation. These five benefits add up to a powerful competitive advantage that comes from workplace cultures of connection.

One recent leader who created a connection culture is Ed Catmull, CEO of Pixar Animation and Disney Animation Studios. Catmull cares for people and cares for results. He wants the people he is responsible for leading to thrive and, as a result,  has made culture his full-time job. He writes about this new focus in his recent book, Creativity, Inc.

How to Change Workplace Culture

Leaders can create cultures of connection by communicating an inspiring vision that unites, valuing people as human beings rather than means to an end, and giving people a voice in decisions that affect them. I recommend leaders focus on shaping the attitudes, uses of language, and behaviors of the people they are responsible for leading.

CNO Admiral Vern Clark, the former chief of the Navy did this.  When Admiral Clark became the Chief of Naval Operations in 2000, the Navy was not meeting its first term enlisted sailor reenlistment goal. Clark visited bases around the world, meeting with both the officer class and the master chiefs who lead the enlisted class of sailors. Clark told the master chiefs a story about a master chief who mentored him on his first ship and how it made him a better sailor and leader. He asked the master chiefs to mentor and coach the sailors under their command like the master chief who mentored him. Clark said if the master chiefs mentored their enlisted sailors, the Navy would have the sailors it needed.

The master chiefs weren’t used to meeting with the Chief of Naval Operations. They appreciated that Admiral Clark knew their leadership made a difference and they weren’t going to let him down. This and other actions initiated by Clark and his leaders (including the master chiefs) contributed to a rise in enlisted sailor first term reenlistment. Within 18 months of Admiral Clark’s becoming the chief, first term reenlistment soared from under 38 percent (the Navy’s goal) to near 57 percent.

Today, 70 percent of American employees report they do not feel connected at work. Changing workplace cultures in ways that boost connection will not only improve America’s productivity, it will also provide psychological resources to cope with the rising stress of modern life thereby improving the employee’s health and happiness.

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