Aurora Rey's Blog, page 2

My Big Fat Bare-Arm Summer

As I got dressed this morning, I thought about how the start of the semester is pretty much here and summer is all but over. I put on one of my favorite skirts and a summery top. I spritzed myself with perfume, checked my look in the mirror, and smiled. Then I went downstairs to have my coffee and get a few words before work.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. Aurora, this is not blog post material.

But here’s the thing. (There’s always a thing, you know.) The top in question is this super cut...

On Being a Single Lady

Up in the club. (On my couch, actually.)
Just broke up. (Almost a year ago, technically.)
Doing my own little thing. (That part is true.)

For not the first time in my adult life, but for the first time in a while, I find myself solo. In my house. That’s all mine. All by myself. (If you’re like me and tend to stay friends/live with exes long after breaking up, you’ll note this is an important distinction.)

Well, there’s Oliver, so not entirely solo. He’s decent at cuddles, actually. And I have...

Do I Make You Wanna?

A while ago, someone sent me a link to song I’d never heard before by a guy I’d never heard of. It was a flirty and sweet sort of text, meant to make me feel pretty and hint at adventures to come. It did both of those things, but also a whole hell of a lot more.

First, it gave me a gentle nudge into country music. Or, perhaps it’s more accurate to say, back into country music.

I grew up on country. The John Denver and Kenny Rogers variety. I went through high school on pop, but also on Garth...

Both/And, Guilty Diva Edition

I mentioned in my last post, the one about the RITAs, that I’ve been wrestling more and more with the idea of both/and. Not just accepting that life is full of contradictions, but working to make space in my psyche, heart, etc. to hold those contradictory things. And, of course, the idea that being able to hold both is the source of both wisdom and joy.

To that end, I’ve settled into being a RITA finalist. I’m celebrating some good reviews for my newest book, Recipe for Love, and not letting...

Both/And, RITA Edition

Less than a week ago, I was at the HERS Institute, a leadership development program for women in higher education. During the morning session, I got a phone call, but I didn’t answer (because we were in session and I’m a professional like that). I didn’t answer the second time, either. At this point, a little voice in my head reminded me the RITA® finalists were due to be announced. When it rang a third time in under an hour, I left the room to answer, sure that I’d be missing out on critical...

Closer to Fine

This weekend, I experienced a lesbian rite of passage at one of my favorite local venues–my first Indigo Girls concert. Although they’ve never been a staple of my musical lexicon (I know, bad lesbian), I had no trouble appreciating the show, both in terms of the music and being surrounded by practically every lesbian in town.

There is one Indigo Girls song I know by heart–“Closer to Fine.” Yes, I know, I’m obvious. Feel free to poke fun. Technically, though, I became obsessed with it natural...

Best Friends and Big Feelings

Those of you who know me know I love me some Myers Briggs. I’m pretty hardcore INFP. This means I’m an introverted, intuitive, feeling, perceiver (with some J coping strategies to give me the illusion of control). Another way of describing me is the mediator. I can listen with empathy and make folks feel better. I handle difficult situations gracefully and graciously.

More often than not, this is all good. Better than, even. The problem is that, paired with my unique flavor of childhood “stuf...

Adorable, et al. (A Fat Femme’s Guide to Managing Pesky Adjectives)

So, I’m home from yet another amazing Women’s Week. Each time I go, I’m in awe of the community of writers and editors and readers who come together to mingle, have fun, learn, and celebrate lesbian fiction. It fills my cup in more ways than I can count.

This year brought more of the same, but a new layer. Newly out of a relationship, I tried to embrace a flirtier, sassier side of myself. It went well, I’d say. Mostly. A couple of misfires, but that’s to be expected. Especially when wine is p...

Everything I Need to Know in Life, I Learned from You’ve Got Mail

According to Joe Fox, “The Godfather is the I Ching. The Godfather is the sum of all wisdom. The Godfather is the answer to any question.”

I beg to differ, even if I agree with the sentiment of leaving the gun and taking the cannoli. And while I don’t really think You’ve Got Mail is the sum all wisdom, I’ve gotten a lot more out of it than I ever got out of The Godfather.

For example, fall is the best season, especially in New York. A bouquet of freshly sharpened pencils would win big points...

Raising the Barre

I’ve never been skinny. I’ve made peace with the fact that I never will be. Really, I have.

There have been a few times in my life, however, when I’ve been fit. When I’ve felt strong and limber and good about my ability to move the way I want. The most recent of those involved dance class. Belly. Modern. Ballet.

It was a few years ago now that I was going to three or four dance classes a week. I’ve wanted to go back, but the combination of time and money and the dread of getting back on the w...