Laura Marie Altom's Blog, page 2

Mini-Vacation--Skinny Butt Required!!

Me and my fab agent, Michelle Grajkowski at the Harlequin party!!
Hate being a Debbie Downer, but ever since returning from RWA I've been sick.  After lots of tests, my doctor suspects a kidney stone(s), but progress in fixing the issue is moving as slow as our horrible Tulsa traffic.  Anyway, I'm not in screaming agony, but I sure don't feel up to doing much of anything.

This wouldn't be any big deal save for the fact that Hubby and I have been planning an amazing trip to Belize since January.  We were to leave in two weeks.  Belize isn't an easy destination.  From Tulsa, takes two days to get there, and pretty much anything you do in the country requires a tiny plane or boat.  We were excited to explore caves, ruins and reefs.  Scuba and zip line.  Considering the fact that lately I need a rest stop every five feet, no Belize for us.  I canceled our international and domestic flights, our romantic luxury hotel and then pouted.  And pouted.  And pouted.

Because of other issues too ghastly to even discuss, it's been a seriously crap few days.  In the midst of our general Altom Crapstorm, my sweet, amazing, handsome hubby took me on a mini-vacation that lifted my spirits.

I was surprised by how small the plane was.Loving anything vintage, when I saw that a restored DC-3 was on display, I wanted to go!  Now, for hubby, it was all about seeing the plane.  For me, it was about the people who flew on the plane.  I wanted to imagine how elegant air travel used to be.  Even as a kid, I remember my grandmother buying me a new dress to fly in.  The plane we toured is said to have carried only the mega-rich and travelers were dressed just short of Black Tie.  We flipped through photos and the most fun of all were the stewardesses.

Me at the controls!!  I know, I know, they're now called Flight Attendants, but back when I wanted to be one more than anything in the world, I told everyone I was going to be a stewardess--sounded MUCH more romantic!! Back in the day, there were strict requirements.  From the pics, they were all roughly the same height, had perfect figures and hair and resembled living Barbie Dolls.  From the vintage photos, the glamor factor looks off-the-charts!!

Our tour literally lasted only ten minutes.  Me and my overactive imagination had conjured images of this massive luxury liner complete with a walk-up bar, lounge and huge comfy seats.  I couldn't have been more wrong!  The seats were so narrow, no one on the plane with us even fit in them except for a few little kids!!  Your butt would have to be ridiculously skinny for you to be comfortable!!!  LOL!!  The plane held 21 apparently emaciated passengers, two pilots and a lucky stewardess.

Check out those narrow seats!!! But plenty of leg room . . .Sweet Hubby bought me a T-shirt and that was my big hour out of the house.  Back home, I was happy for a nap, but at least instead of pouting over our lost trip to Belize, I now had fun dreams of me being a stewardess who only works the routes to Paris and Rome!!

A SEAL's Secret Baby--finally in stores NOW!!!P.S.  The first book of my new Operation Family SEAL series, A SEAL's Secret Baby debuts this month and should now be in stores nationwide!!  Happy Reading!! :-)     

It's Hard Being Lazy!!!

This year's PJ Party T-shirt selection!! Tonight, I'll have a big wedding to talk about, but this morning, for once in a very long time I'm looking at a whole day filled with nothing but FUN!!  All manuscripts and proposals are in, AAs and line edits are done.  The house is fairly clean.  Of course, there's still Mt. Laundry to summit, but it'll wait.

So here I sit, contemplating one of the greatest gifts of all--time--and realizing it's actually a little daunting figuring out what to do.  When I'm in deadline peril, I can always think of a gazillion things I'd rather be doing.  Reading someone else's book, crafting, sewing, gardening, watching a movie, playing a video game (Fallout's my current fave!), lunching with family and friends.

While all of that does sound fun, as busy as the past few weeks have been, what sounds best of all is just, plain sitting!!  LOL!!

In other news . . .  The annual Romance Writer's of America (RWA) conference is fast approaching and as usual, I have NOTHING to wear.  I was supposed to have lost 200 lbs by now, but only managed 30.  Bleh.  Better than nothing, but left me in size limbo.

The one item I have found is the above T-shirt for me and my roomies, FAB authors Margaret Daley and Winnie Griggs, to wear to the eHarlequin.com PJ party.  I'm not sure how the tradition even started, but at least ten years ago, Margaret and I decided it might be fun to match.  We used to get actual PJs, but they've gotten REALLY hard to find.  When Winnie started rooming with us, we were gracious enough to include her in our tradition--a very high honor!!  LOL!!

Since I'm getting my nails done for the wedding, maybe I'll do more conference shopping, too?  Or should I take a nap?  Decisions, decisions . . .

What are you doing with your precious Saturday?

My Magic Fork . . .

My magic fork . . . Anyone who knows me, knows I LOVE my collections.  For me, antique shops, thrift stores, yard sales and even beaches all hold the thrill of the hunt.  I'm always on the lookout for exquisite, long-forgotten needlework, crystal balls, oil paintings and silver.  Oh--and Limoges figurine boxes.  But the day I find a piece of Limoges at a yard sale or thrift store, you'll hear me shrieking all the way from wherever you happen to be!!  LOL!!

I'm in between contracts and using the down time to play--which means FINALLY repainting my office and cleaning closets and sorting the treasures I've spent all year accumulating.  In one of those bottomless flotsam boxes that seem to be junk breeding grounds, I came across the best bag.  On the outside, it wasn't much.  Just your ordinary white plastic grocery sack.  But inside, I found treasure!!

Sand-filled cups from our visit to Soggy Dollar Bar on Jost Van Dyke, BVI.  (www.soggydollar.com)
Shells, bits of coral and sponge, sea glass and dried anemones.  Best of all, a heavily tarnished, barnacle-crusted fork.  I LOVE silver--but not just any silver.  It has to be antique--preferably from either romantic bygone-era passenger trains, historic hotels or just, plain real old.  See?  I'm not all that picky!!

How I forgot having that fork, I'll never know, but dropping all other projects, I immediately grabbed my silver cream and went to work.  After an hour scrubbing, I unearthed gorgeous, engraved filigree on the handle. 

Heart racing, I scrubbed and scrubbed, but saltwater had taken a toll.  Remembering an old trick my dad taught me, I drowned the poor thing in ketchup, then went on with my day.   

While driving to Lowe's for unromantic caulk, I daydreamed.  What if my fork turned out to be not just silver, but legit silver--like from shipwreck silver?!  What if it was royal silver and I looked it up online and found not only the pattern, but a reward for its safe return being offered by The British Museum??!!

Sigh . . .  Can you tell I write romantic fiction for a living?  LOL!!

By the time Hannah and I got home from running errands, the ketchup on my fork had turned black--a good sign in silver polishing world.  I scrubbed and scrubbed, beyond excited to find the silver mark.  Just how old would it be?  A hundred years?  Four hundred years?  I scrubbed faster!!
I saw something written on the back, but with my stupid over-forty wacky vision, my glasses had to go.  Tossing my glasses, I held the fork an inch from my eyes . . .

 . . . And then, my heart sank to see in very modern lettering, "Crusader Silver Plate".  Ugh.  So much for me being flown to England to be personally thanked by the Queen.

By this point, most sane people would've thrown the stupid thing away, but not me.  What do I do?  Make a fancy undersea arrangement with my fork at the center.  Why?  Because even though my fork may have been ordinary to the rest of the world, to me, it represented a little bit of magic.  How cool was it, that even for an afternoon, that barnacle-crusted fork held the power to transport me from brown, HOT Oklahoma to the heavenly British Virgin Islands?  And beyond that, Windsor Castle?

I love my fork.  I love my shells and coral.  I love my quirky life and not-quite-normal collections, and the fact that when I dream, I dream BIG!! 

What've you dreamed lately? 
     
     

It's Raining Men--Again!!!!

Haven't had a blog-worthy day like this in a while!!  LOL!!

Daughter's headed off on a romantic weekend, and I'm stuck home weeding, or cleaning baseboards or closets.  In preparation for her trip, we got the oil changed and found free donuts in the dealer waiting room!!  Doesn't get much better than that, right?!

Just wait--our next stop was Hancock fabrics.  In my office I have an ancient piece of furniture leftover from our EARLY days of marriage I fondly call my "grundunza"  It's a truly hideous old-school office credenza I picked up at a used furniture store for like ten bucks.  The fun thing about this piece is that once it's covered in fabric, it's not only cute, but I can hide LOTS of boxes of books under it. 

Since we're in the midst of summer-sprucing, I figured it's time to recover the grundunza.  Hannah and I must have circled Hancocks ten times when we finally stumbled across this truly awesome fabric!!

Architectural Digest wouldn't like it, but I think it's tacky FUN!! Can you imagine this being perfect in any room other than a romance writer's office??!!  It's not exactly the elegant sophistication I had in mind when we set out, but hey, me and elegant have never really been synonymous . . . :-)

Okay, so even though I know it's hideous in a wonderful way, I bought $50 bucks worth of hunky guy fabric, then, as if angels were applauding my decision, they sent me this:

Seriously?  Is it even fair for a guy to be this HOT??!!
Like the good writer girl I am--stop laughing--I actually wrote quite a bit this morning, and as luck would have it, my new SEAL had a shirtless scene.  Now, lest you think me a full-on creeper, any guy running around like this is just asking to be used in a romance novel.  Lucky for me, I got dibs on him first!!   
 


   

Seether, Bush, Nickleback & BOK Lady

In March we bought tickets to see Seether/Bush/Nickleback in concert and last night it was finally time for the big show!!  After fours hours of singing and dancing, then another hour getting out of the parking garage, I'm one tired puppy--but in a good way!!  Here's a timeline for how the night went down:

5:00--Hubby shouts from video game lair, "You ever check the time on the tickets?"  I assume it's seven or eight like most concerts, so tell him to chill.  He actually gets up to check and crazy ensues!!!!!  Concert starts at six!!!!!

5:04--Looking beyond crappy with nap-hair, no make-up and wearing my faded Tool T-shirt, I hover at the door while miffed daughter throws camera at me.  She wanted to go REAL bad.  We offered to buy her and a friend cheap seats, but I think she was hoping at the last minute either me or her dad would get freakishly sick or suffer an alien abduction, thereby landing a ticket in her hot little hands!!!  LOL!!!  (As if mere aliens could keep me away from Gavin Rossdale??!!)

5:05--We enter the hellish world otherwise known as Tulsa traffic.  During hockey season, we routinely make it to the BOK center in ten minutes--fifteen max.  On this night, we encountered everything from mini-van drivers going thirty mph under the speed limit to construction to too many red lights to count.

5:34--Patted down for weapons and was mortified when told by security lady to, " . . . move all that junk so I can see to the bottom," of my purse.  Relieved "junk" distracted her from finding the AK-47 in the zipped side pocket. 

5:40--Hubby and I fight over whether to get T-shirts, Billy's onion rings or find our seats.

5:41--I win!!  T-shirt line . . .

5:52--Hubby wins--food line . . .

5:59--Charging through crowds at BOK to find our seats!!  Music has already started!!!  OMG, if I miss Bush so Hubby could have onion rings, the night's going to get UGLY!!!

6:03--Reach seats, only to get snapped at by BOK Lady who should be fired--more on her later . . .

6:04--Hubby forgiven when band playing is someone we've never heard of.  I take this opportunity to steal a smooch and half of Hubby's onion rings!!!

6:30-ish:  Seether takes the stage.  Hubby and I were both excited to see them, but sadly, the performance wasn't all that hot.  A blinding light pointing out at the audience pretty much stopped us from ever seeing the band, and the base was so loud my chest ached.  On two side screens flashed bizarro black and white pics of clowns with their mouths sewn shut and offensive dead babies.  I scream in Hubby's ear that they should've used those screens to show close-ups of Shaun.  Because of my love for this band, I assumed lead singer, Shaun Morgan Welgemoe, must've overdone it on the world famous Billy's onion rings, and was under a bit of gastric distress that rendered him temporarily incapable of putting on a good show.  Seether, I still love you, but next time you hit Tulsa, you owe me a better show!!

6:45-ish:  Remember the snippy BOK lady I mentioned earlier?  After barking at me to take my cup off the rail, a crew of four drunk guys stumble into the seats next to us.  Not only are they allowed to rest their eight beers on the rail--no joke, they had two beers each--but there's lot of hugging and flirting with BOK lady.  One of the guys asks her for a wrist band to get on the floor, she gets all blushy and tells him she couldn't possibly give him one.  Ha!!!  More on this later . . .

7:00-ish:  Finally got my first real-live look at Gavin Rossdale and pretty sure my heart stopped.  My second book--it's so old I don't even remember the title--was written with his pic over my keyboard.  Every stroke was lovingly dedicated to him.  I'd loved him for a looooong time even before that.  When "Everything Zen" came out, the twins were two, and they're now college juniors!!!

The screens flanking the stage were finally put to good use when Gavin's beautiful face and trademark man-curls were flashed big and gorgeous just for me.  By the time they played "Everything Zen", pretty sure I cried.  The song doesn't even make sense, but it strikes a chord in me that makes me want to dance and be naughty--with Gavin!!!!  LOL!!!!  Oh--and did I mention how sexy his arms were while wielding his guitar??!! 

Sadly, BOK Lady's drunk friends wander in and out of the seats next to us during Bush's entire performance.  Before this, we got the impression they didn't even have tickets for these seats, but she was doing them a favor by letting them sit there.  They sloshed beer, hugged me--not in a fun way--stepped on my toes, spilled my diet Dr. Pepper, and in general pissed me off.  This was a seriously special moment for me and between them and the five-thousand folks streaming by, I was unable to fully enjoy the show in the way God intended.

"Glycerine"
Midway through Bush's performance, the crowd went NUTS when Gavin leaps off the stage and starts running through the crowd.  We were on the first row of the seated section, so when he ran around the floor, it looked like he was coming straight for us.  He was within ten feet of ME when he veered up into the stands and never came back our way.  Color me still pouting . . .

8:30-ish:  During intermission, really nice lady sits next to me and says, "Do you know if those drunk guys even have tickets to sit on this row?"  I tell her we guessed they do not.  She goes on to say they spilled beer all over her and the floor, and that if we wouldn't mind, they'd like to sit beside us for Nickleback.  BOK Man comes over, and she repeats story to him.  And how BOK Lady seems to be all buddy-buddy with these guys, letting them do pretty much whatever they want, while the rest of our row has to behave.  Much whispering amongst the BOK People ensues.  BOK Lady GLARES in our direction, but then gets flirty with a leather-garbed lady rocker.           

8:35-ish:  Nickleback takes the stage and all I can say is, DAMN, can these boys put on a show!!!!!!  I was initially shocked by Chad Kroeger's short hair, but once he started singing, I forgave him.

Nickleback's stage set was AWESOME!!  Chad's in the center.


Chad with his short hair.  I still love you!!! Chad with his short hair and eyes open!!  LOL!!  
The pyro show blew my mind!!!
 "Figure You Out"
Fireworks and lasers accompanied plenty of great tunes and playing with the crowd.  I got my close-up shots when the band climbed into a mini-stage in the arena's center.  At one point, Chad stopped a song to ask a guy if he was actually talking on his cell.  He takes the guy's phone and proceeds to have a conversation with whoever was on the line.  At another point in the show, the band lobbed red Solo cups filled with beer into the crowd.  Once I got past thinking how relieved I was to not have beer in my hair, I had time to note that flying beer + lasers and smoke is/are actually quite pretty!!  LOL!!!

Wonderful, wonderful show!!!!!

Only as we were leaving, guess who we saw stumbling off the floor, proudly wearing neon green floor pass wrist bands??!!  ALL FOUR OBNOXIOUS DRUNK GUYS.  Next concert, I'm flirting with BOK Lady!!!!  

After the show, the haze from the fireworks was so thick, you could hardly see across the arena.
 

Fried Mushrooms and an Accidental Movie!

 Hannah, Granny Sylv and Hubby!
Happy Mother's Day!!

I know it was yesterday, but I had so much fun, I'm still thinking about it today!  We have a long-standing tradition of going to the Muskogee Renaissance Faire, but with Little Terry stuck working, we didn't feel right going without him.  We'd planned on lunching at the restaurant where he works, but it was too crowded to get a table!  Great job security for him, but that meant no Little Terry for me.  Flanked by my other two sweeties, Hannah and Russell--Hubby, too--we accidentally hit an early showing of Johnny Depp's Dark Shadows.  We thought we were seeing The Avengers in Imax, but just as we got to the front of the loooong line for tickets, the Imax guy announced it wasn't showing.  I LOVE Imax, so we stayed and ended up loving it!!  Funny and a little spooky and even had a dash of romance!!

From there, we decided Hideaway Pizza wasn't a traditional Mother's Day hotspot and we were right.  No waiting for a table!  After feasting on fried mushrooms dipped in ranch and delicious sausage and mushroom pizza, we headed to see Hubby's nearly 92 year-old grandmother, Granny Sylv.  She has Alzheimer's, but oddly enough, far from her condition being sad, she's super spry and has mentally reverted back to when she was in her twenties.  She's always been a flirt and now has a new "husband" she introduced us to.  When I asked when she got married, she winked and said, "Oh, he's just the live-in kind.  I like those best."  Hannah and I took that to mean she might be temporarily "living with" Tom, but is keeping her options open in case someone hotter comes along??!!   

From there, I needed a nap before starting the second part of our day.  Earlier in the week, my sweet, gorgeous, funny flight attendant friend, Nancy, and her hubby, Randy, invited us for dinner and a glamorous night out at our performing arts center to see Fiddler on the Roof.  It was SO GOOD!!  Although, it'd been years since I'd seen it--with my friend Robert in the cast--and had forgotten the ending isn't exactly joyous, but kinda deeply thought provoking.  Nancy has been in it two times and softly sang along--she missed her calling!!  Hope Delta appreciates having a Broadway star on their flights!!    

Maybe it's the writer in me, but whenever I'm at a live performance, my mind wanders to the cast.  What are their stories?  How long have they been on the road?  Where are they staying?  Who's fooling around with who?  People watching at the theater is the BEST!!  So many real life characters paraded out for me to see!!

By now, you're probably wondering where this is going, and as I'm still pooped and have a tough day of revisions in front of me, probably nowhere profound.  Just an observation about my Mother's Day gifts.  Best was spending time with my awesome family and friends.  And I always love homemade cards and store bought cards with heartfelt messages and gorgeous flowers.  But as someone who spends her life dreaming up stories that hopefully entertain, sitting back, relaxing and being entertained is a great luxury.  From start to finish, my Mother's Day was perfection!!  What did you do?              

Critters, Babies and Mid-Year Resolutions!!

 Hubby and I at Easter dinner . . . In Los Cabos, because Little Terry was working as the waiter!!
What a week!!!  Let's see, in the past seven days we've done taxes, had a super sick kiddo (thank goodness she's now on the mend), discovered a new critter gnawing his or her way into our house, had a prom to find a suit for, celebrated Easter at a Mexican restaurant, got Daisy trimmed for warmer weather, discovered our two-year-old stove is breaking and four-month-old fridge is on the fritz, said some pretty major hellos and goodbyes, toss in a sprinkling of family drama, and in case that wasn't enough, today, on what was supposed to be me and Hubby's fun afternoon casino date, we both left the Osage as big sad losers.

In the midst of all of that, I managed to squeeze in some writing, but not nearly as much as I'd've liked.  Part of being a writer is tackling lots of questions--where do I get my ideas?  How long does it take to write one of "those" books?  Are you rich?  And the one I struggle with the most--how do you summon creativity and romance on demand?

Each New Year's Eve, when I'm trotting out my tried, true and often failed resolutions, along with losing bunches of weight, I always vow that this will be the year I don't let outside issues interfere with my writing time.  Why am I bringing this up now instead of back in January?  Because it's only April and here I am, already sweating the little and not-so-little things that take up valuable space in my mind!!

Meanwhile, poor Tristan needs me to help him come to grips with his ex's remarriage and cross-country move with his son.  Then there's Brynn--feeling thirteen months pregnant while single-handedly raising a sullen six-year-old and dealing with the fallout of her murdered superstar baseball-playing hubby having hidden secrets more devastating than she feels capable to bear.  Their problems make mine seem silly, so why can't I put their issues front and center?  Why does yet another squirrel or raccoon dining our house take center stage in my head when Brynn's baby is due any second??!!  See?  I must learn to set priorities, people!!

Okay, so I'm taking a deep breath and vowing that next week my fictional characters are going to feel far more real than the usual chaos ruling our home.  If an appliance breaks, I'm not going to let it get a rise out of me.  If anyone has drama, they'll need to make an appointment!!  As for all those pounds I'm supposed to be losing, I'm already down twenty . . . should I go for twenty-five? :-)

V-Day Fairy vs. Fixing the Hot Water Heater

Hubby's sweet gift came early with this hot pink Oilers 
jersey from one of my fave players, Jeff Terminesi!!!

Happy Valentine's Day!!

Funny, how over the years the day's meaning and/or events have changed.  When I was a kid, Mom and I couldn't wait for Dad to get home.  He'd always have one or two tin-foil-wrapped gifts for each of us.  For me, sometimes as simple as a teen magazine I'd been wanting and a big candy bar.  In my teens, I usually got a special piece of jewelry--my favorite, a tiny mouse set atop a gold ring.  He even has ruby eyes!  Mom and I were just talking with Dad about how much we looked forward to seeing him, guessing at what surprises he might bring.

As a teen, of course the big day was all about romance!!!  The year I received a bouquet from my boyfriend, one from my parents and another from my ex-boyfriend's mother who I'm pretty sure still wishes we were back together, was a super exciting year!!

In college, the day became less about what I got and more about what I could give.  Back then, the University of Arkansas choir sold singing telegrams for five bucks!  God bless Whitney Houston, as her songs were the best for wooing and landed my hubby!!  Music holds the power to transform all of us into time-travelers and for me, her voice and lyrics transport me to those special college times.

Fast forward a few years and the twins were introduced to the Valentine Fairy!!  I was always Little Terry's Valentine and hubby was Hannah's.  The Valentine Fairy always added a little extra sparkle--a Barbie or Pokemon cards.

Now, Hubby and I are pretty content lounging in our PJs in front of the fire and romantic gifts usually consist of fixing something broken around the house!!  LOL!!

This year, however, Hannah will be doing her Ice Girl thing at tonight's Oilers game, so we'll romance over a shared order of Billy's onion rings at the BOK Center!!  Wish the hot pink jersey we won at auction Saturday night would be ready to wear, but alas, it's still being fumigated!!  (Hockey players might look good, but wow, do they work up a sweaty funk!!  LOL!!)

What phase of Valentine's Day are you all in?  Whichever it is, hope you're surrounded by LOVE!!!    

Happy Birthday to Me--Now Get to Work!!

A very content me last year in St. Thomas.  If possible, Birthday Fairy, I want to go there RIGHT NOW!! :-)It's my birthday and I'm feeling a smidge philosophical.  I should be cleaning for the arrival of my parents and prepping for Thanksgiving dinner, but what fun is that??!!

It's been a strange year I'm glad is officially over.  If there's been any overriding theme I can't ignore, it's that health has got to take center stage.  I'm putting it out there that by my birthday next year, I WILL lose at least fifty pounds.  Yesterday, I picked up a seventeen pound turkey and nearly couldn't do it.  Not cool, but it is what it is and lord willing, by this time next year I'll be doing laps around Super Wal-Mart with my Honeysuckle White.

Another area of personal housekeeping I vow to work on is organization.  I've given ten bags of clothes and misc. household flotsam to Goodwill in the past couple weeks, and would love to give more.  One of my fave TV shows is Hoarders, because it always inspires me to tidy.  Like if they can clean those huge messes, I can tackle the junk drawer and closets!!

One big goal in regard to my writing is to be more like my amazing friend, Margaret Daley.  And I'm not just saying this because she's taking me to birthday lunch!!  LOL!!  Margaret plans her days down to the minute and gets more done than anyone I know.  In the time it takes me to write one book, she'll write three.  Her secret?  Consistency.  She writes EVERY day.  I think I'll put a pic of her on the wall beside my desk, always reminding me to write by the Margaret Method.

Other small things I must tackle during this, my forty-fourth year:

Weed our front gardens. Read more.Lunch or coffee more with friends.Sleep more.  Whew, that's plenty for now, and even if it weren't I seriously need to get on with Turkey Day prep.  To all my friends I've been been neglecting--I'll be nagging you soon to go play!!  Until then, here's to hoping we all have an extra special Thanksgiving!! 

Seat Stealers--I'm Watching You!!!

Hubby and I with our Hannah.  She's our fave Ice Girl!!!
Tonight is date night as Hubby and I are headed to an Oilers game!!  This is big for me as I actually do my hair and he's charming and attentive and buys me onion rings while lots of hot guys skate within a couple feet of my seat.  Sounds perfect, right?!

It would be if not for a breed of people I will now call the despicable "Seat Stealers".  Some back story--lauramariealtom.com is a corporate sponsor of the Tulsa Oilers.  I figure what better product for a romance writer to sponsor than men.  Along with my sponsorship, I get a pair of REALLY great seats, but they aren't exactly cheap.  Because of the price, during some games, not all of the glass seats are occupied, making way for the Seat Stealers.

Now, not all Seat Stealers are inherently bad.  A couple behind us who also have season tickets send down their little boy who politely cheers on our guys and doesn't litter.  He's cute and well-mannered and doesn't bother me a bit.  Drunks are always welcome, as they up the the night's entertainment factor by setting their beers on the little ledge under the glass.  When players ram into that section, the beer splatters and voila--beer soaked drunk people.  Great fun!!  Especially when they're happy drunks!!

Unfortunately, sweet little Trent is the cream of the crop when it comes to Seat Stealers.  We had a game Sunday and I arrived a little later than usual.  (Hubby was out of town.)  I get to our seats and there are already TEN people in our row.  I think it only holds fifteen and our seats are seven and eight.  First, this crew refused to let me in.  They all just stared like I should climb over them.  Finally through, I set my purse and blanket in seat twelve, politely asking the girl in MY SEASON SEATS if she has tickets.  She says, "No, we got in free."

I say, "That's great, but you're sitting in MY SEASON SEATS."

This girl gives me a death stare I found chilling, then shrugs.

Fuming, I sit in seat twelve, trying to figure my next move.  Then a strange thing happens.  The guy in seat one seems to be the group leader announces they have to move.  So six of them move to the glass seats in section 101 and four stay with me, moving to seats one through four, the whole time glaring like I've done something wrong.

Oh well, at least I've got my seats, right?  Ha!  Next to arrive?  AN ENTIRE PEEWEE HOCKEY TEAM!!!  Well over a dozen rowdy, sticky, spilling, dripping, jumping, horribly behaved kids fill in the rest of the row.  More kids file in behind them.  Where are their parents??!!  These kids were so bad, I moved closer to the original Seat Stealers to attempt getting away. 

During the first period intermission, two of my adult row mates start making out so hard I thought I might need a condom!!!

Some time during the third period, thankfully, the bad kids ran off.  Sweet little Trent appeared and what does he do?  Starts picking up all the trash the other kids left!!

Sadly, most every game, this scenario plays out in some form.  Like I earlier said, if people are polite about it, it's not a big deal, but by far most Seat Stealers lack basic human manners.  Tonight, I plan to speak with the BOK Center usher of our section.  I'm highly doubtful this will accomplish anything, but for my own sanity, I have to try.  We've got a long season ahead of us . . .

Lets go Oilers!!!! :-)