Andrew Neff's Blog, page 2
August 24, 2015
Mouse Trap
6-7-10 Monday 10:30 A.M.
I ran out of mouse traps and the little vermin crap all over the kitchen and elsewhere. So, I took a 12 inch wood shim with a dab of peanut butter on one end, then balanced it on the edge of the kitchen counter, hoping it would walk the plank. And underneath, was a deep empty kitchen garbage can.
But this mouse is an olympian jumper, because 4 times I set the trap, and 4 times all I found in the bottom of the garbage can, was the peanut butter shim. But this time Danny wins the battle. This makes number 10 and now I am a double mousing ace.
I’m holding it up by the tail and Marcie sounds amused – wants me to keep it and build a mouse maze.
Excerpt from: "The Mind Game Company - The Players"
I ran out of mouse traps and the little vermin crap all over the kitchen and elsewhere. So, I took a 12 inch wood shim with a dab of peanut butter on one end, then balanced it on the edge of the kitchen counter, hoping it would walk the plank. And underneath, was a deep empty kitchen garbage can.
But this mouse is an olympian jumper, because 4 times I set the trap, and 4 times all I found in the bottom of the garbage can, was the peanut butter shim. But this time Danny wins the battle. This makes number 10 and now I am a double mousing ace.
I’m holding it up by the tail and Marcie sounds amused – wants me to keep it and build a mouse maze.
Excerpt from: "The Mind Game Company - The Players"
August 18, 2015
Credit Card Application
“Yesterday I got a credit card application from a major bank with a variable rate of 12.99% to 20.99%. Such a deal, no it’s actually an annoying insult. So, I wrote them a return letter:
Dear major bank,
Thank you for the opportunity to express how I really feel about your corporation. What I do appreciate, is that there is no stamp required for your return envelope. After tearing off all my personal information, so some dumpster diver doesn’t fill out your application for me, and find out he picked the wrong target; I just wanted to make one comment:
Your practice of usury and fractional reserve banking is despicable along with crashing the global economy.
Danny: I think I have my grandmother’s charm and wit. Too bad she’s not here to share it with. Maybe if every disgruntled person would use that free envelope and apply their creative talent, they might get the picture that we’re tired of this bullshit.
Marcie, there are so many people you could visit and test your information extraction program on, so what are you people doing here? Is this just a practice run? Well, you wanted to know what I was thinking. And you wonder why I look to God for solutions. Wake me up when it’s over.
Marcie: You are a crazy SOB. You want me to use my system to play Robin Hood.
Danny: You’d make an excellent Robin Hood, make sure you get your merry band to sign on. Maybe that’s the reason we were connected.
How much materialism do you really need? Some people take what they need from the orchard and other people pick the orchard clean.
Marcie: You’re wondering what I’m thinking. I don’t want to mess your mind up with what I’m thinking, so let me simply say, I don’t approve of what some of these people have been doing for decades.
Who do you think I am?
Danny: Someone who frustrates me, don’t we have enough guessing games in life?
Marcie: Marcie is a miracle worker, so what does that tell you? You do not even know what to make of me, someone who keeps coming back for you, someone who won’t let go of you.
Danny: Why is it that there’s only a handful of words for truth and over 100 synonyms and derivatives for deception?
Marcie: Are you surprised?
Danny: It puts it in a different light when you start reading through the list. You may as well add amygdala hijacking.
Marcie: Has Danny been bamboozled?
Danny: You picked one with an unknown origin.
Marcie: That is the best way to start a mind game.
Danny: Okay, just for kicks, try saying synonym - cinnamon 10 times as fast as you can.
From - "The Mind Game Company - The Players”
Andrew Neff
Dear major bank,
Thank you for the opportunity to express how I really feel about your corporation. What I do appreciate, is that there is no stamp required for your return envelope. After tearing off all my personal information, so some dumpster diver doesn’t fill out your application for me, and find out he picked the wrong target; I just wanted to make one comment:
Your practice of usury and fractional reserve banking is despicable along with crashing the global economy.
Danny: I think I have my grandmother’s charm and wit. Too bad she’s not here to share it with. Maybe if every disgruntled person would use that free envelope and apply their creative talent, they might get the picture that we’re tired of this bullshit.
Marcie, there are so many people you could visit and test your information extraction program on, so what are you people doing here? Is this just a practice run? Well, you wanted to know what I was thinking. And you wonder why I look to God for solutions. Wake me up when it’s over.
Marcie: You are a crazy SOB. You want me to use my system to play Robin Hood.
Danny: You’d make an excellent Robin Hood, make sure you get your merry band to sign on. Maybe that’s the reason we were connected.
How much materialism do you really need? Some people take what they need from the orchard and other people pick the orchard clean.
Marcie: You’re wondering what I’m thinking. I don’t want to mess your mind up with what I’m thinking, so let me simply say, I don’t approve of what some of these people have been doing for decades.
Who do you think I am?
Danny: Someone who frustrates me, don’t we have enough guessing games in life?
Marcie: Marcie is a miracle worker, so what does that tell you? You do not even know what to make of me, someone who keeps coming back for you, someone who won’t let go of you.
Danny: Why is it that there’s only a handful of words for truth and over 100 synonyms and derivatives for deception?
Marcie: Are you surprised?
Danny: It puts it in a different light when you start reading through the list. You may as well add amygdala hijacking.
Marcie: Has Danny been bamboozled?
Danny: You picked one with an unknown origin.
Marcie: That is the best way to start a mind game.
Danny: Okay, just for kicks, try saying synonym - cinnamon 10 times as fast as you can.
From - "The Mind Game Company - The Players”
Andrew Neff
July 20, 2015
What Possessed You to Start Writing
What Possessed You to Start Writing
Oddly enough, I still remember murmur diphthongs from grammar school. By high school, I was lured into experiencing the story, which might resemble something like this excerpt from “The Mind Game Company - The Players.”
Danny: When I was in high school, a friend wanted to smoke a joint and showed me his secret spot in the auditorium. There were 20 ft. high accordion doors separating the front and back seats, which folded into a small compartment. I watched as he placed his back on one wall, bridging his feet against the other, and started climbing effortlessly to the top. I followed him up to a small platform.
“What made you think of this?”
It looked like a challenge,” he says and we had a few laughs. Same guy I tripped with and introduced me to Moody Blues, King Crimson, Pink Floyd, Beautiful Day, and a number of others. Still too naive to understand the bricks that make up the system.
And “Zap” comic books, by the “Keep on Trucking,” artist. Just put on the 3-D glasses. Let’s see, what’s his name...
Marcie: Robert Crumb, that is his name.
Danny: He was a strange one. I’m surprised you knew that.
I remember telling my English teacher, “I want to write a story,” and proceeded to share some of the imagery.
“Wow!” she says, “Sounds pretty trippy. I’d love to read it, let me know if I can help you,” but it never came to fruition. Just an epic tale lost in wonderland.
Marcie: I can imagine her reaction. Marcie lived on the wild side.
Danny: I bet you did. Why don’t you tell me about it sometime?
Marcie: Maybe I will.
***
However, accidents have a way of putting a damper on casting your cares to the wind.
Then came a creative writing class in junior college, where I wrote some poetry and started a short story, but the 3D art room is what made me feel alive. Just the beginning there’s more...
Oddly enough, I still remember murmur diphthongs from grammar school. By high school, I was lured into experiencing the story, which might resemble something like this excerpt from “The Mind Game Company - The Players.”
Danny: When I was in high school, a friend wanted to smoke a joint and showed me his secret spot in the auditorium. There were 20 ft. high accordion doors separating the front and back seats, which folded into a small compartment. I watched as he placed his back on one wall, bridging his feet against the other, and started climbing effortlessly to the top. I followed him up to a small platform.
“What made you think of this?”
It looked like a challenge,” he says and we had a few laughs. Same guy I tripped with and introduced me to Moody Blues, King Crimson, Pink Floyd, Beautiful Day, and a number of others. Still too naive to understand the bricks that make up the system.
And “Zap” comic books, by the “Keep on Trucking,” artist. Just put on the 3-D glasses. Let’s see, what’s his name...
Marcie: Robert Crumb, that is his name.
Danny: He was a strange one. I’m surprised you knew that.
I remember telling my English teacher, “I want to write a story,” and proceeded to share some of the imagery.
“Wow!” she says, “Sounds pretty trippy. I’d love to read it, let me know if I can help you,” but it never came to fruition. Just an epic tale lost in wonderland.
Marcie: I can imagine her reaction. Marcie lived on the wild side.
Danny: I bet you did. Why don’t you tell me about it sometime?
Marcie: Maybe I will.
***
However, accidents have a way of putting a damper on casting your cares to the wind.
Then came a creative writing class in junior college, where I wrote some poetry and started a short story, but the 3D art room is what made me feel alive. Just the beginning there’s more...
July 15, 2015
Tricks the muses play
The trick the muses play: They instigate the best improvisational scenes, burbling over with charm and whimsey, when you are too exhausted to write it down. Besides, you know it will evaporate, if you reach for that pen. They're laughing.
All you can do is enjoy the effortless moment, which is not a bad way to fall asleep, knowing there’s an untapped reservoir, and maybe, just maybe it will surface once again.
***
You can usually find music in the background. Currently a moving rendition of The Left Banke’s song “Walk Away Renee,” with Linda Ronstadt & Ann Savoy.
All you can do is enjoy the effortless moment, which is not a bad way to fall asleep, knowing there’s an untapped reservoir, and maybe, just maybe it will surface once again.
***
You can usually find music in the background. Currently a moving rendition of The Left Banke’s song “Walk Away Renee,” with Linda Ronstadt & Ann Savoy.
