Heather S. Ingemar's Blog, page 24

Autumn in the Mountains

This last week has been spectacular. I couldn’t help but take some photos…

Old Farm Truck, video

Back in Time…

Sometimes, I swear to God, I was born in the wrong century… My skillset — hand embroidery, music, tailoring, rapier fencing — is entirely at odds with what is considered “practical” in today’s society. Not that I mind. Sometimes all this technology and news and modern sensibilities drive me nuts. Where did virtue go? Chivalry? Morals? The intelligence to navigate through real-life problems without the use of anything other than your own two hands? Self-reliance?

Sometimes I don’t think we are better off, what with all our cell phones and computers and such (oh, the irony, as I am writing this on my iPad…).

Good thing I can go play in times gone by on the weekends…

The 11 Things Blogging Tagathon

The rules of this madness are:

1. Each person tagged must post 11 things about themselves.

2. They must also answer the 11 questions the ‘tagger’ has set for them.

3. They must create 11 more questions to ask bloggers they have decided to tag.

4. They must then choose 11 bloggers tag them in their post.

5. These lucky bloggers must then be told.

6. There are no tag backs

Dace over at The Long Way Home tagged me and so here we go…!

11 Things About Me:

1. If I could learn any language, it would probably be Anglo Saxon. That waes gode cyninga!

2. Some days I really wish I was more left-brained (practical) than I am… It would make life so much easier if I wasn’t such a dreamer!

3. I am convinced I was born in the wrong century. My skill set is such that it is very impractical for modern life, but would fit very well in ages past!

4. I have moments where I inexplicably know which of my immediate family is on the other end of the ringing phone.

5. I very nearly did not survive childhood. Twice.

6. I have a crazy tough skeleton — I’ve been in multiple situations where I should have broken bones, but didn’t. My husband teases me about being a Terminator.

7. The only culinary thing I have a talent for is pie. I always get asked to bake pies for events and things, and my pies always disappear first at potluck events — when other pies are still sitting on the table!

8. I am a Pisces and LOVE water, yet I have this unfathomable fear of water I cannot see to the bottom of.

9. My favorite fruit is the Asian pear.

10. If I could learn anything, I would want to learn how to make instruments like the old craftsmen did.

11. If I could have any superpower, it would be flight.

11 Questions:

1. what makes your heart skip a beat?

Birth control pills. You may laugh, but I’m going to use this as a moment for a word of caution to all you ladies who think the pill is the best thing since sliced bread. Like most women, I went on the pill right before I got married. Within three years, my libido had dropped, and I had all these weird little things going on — sudden onset of Irritable Bowel Syndrome, painful periods (that I hadn’t had since High School), and mood swings, for example. None of them were very serious, and so I wrote them off as ‘just a part of aging.’ Occasionally, I’d have to switch pills because one would quit working, and I sat through months of episodes of painful sex, irritability, problems with my period, and more. All, I was assured by my doctor at Planned Parenthood, were normal and nothing to worry about. Being the naive, trusting patient that I am, I believed them when I shouldn’t have.

Springtime of last year I developed sudden heart palpitations. I’d be fixing my coffee in the morning and my heart would start RACING, and I’d grow short of breath, as if I just ran five miles. Then, it would quit. The first time it happened, I wrote it off as a fluke. We’ve all had moments where our heart just started racing for no apparent reason and it was harmless.

Then it happened again, and again, and again. There were no heart problems in my family, but I was frightened, so I made an appointment with a local women’s doctor. We ran gamut after gamut of tests: blood tests, urine tests, questionnaire after questionnaire. By now (December 2011), I couldn’t even walk up the five steps into work without having trouble breathing. My heart was racing frequently, and never when I had been exerting myself. My doctor hooked me up to a heart monitor over Christmas weekend, and they found nothing amiss.

I asked them if it could have been the birth control, but they wrote me off saying it was “impossible” because “birth control is the safest drug out there for women.” So, I went home and dealt with the palpitations and the shortness of breath for the next four months, because there was nothing else I could do.

By mid March, I had started to get even sicker, at which point my husband suggested I quit the pill. I finished my last pill pack on April 28th, and within two weeks, the palpitations were GONE, the shortness of breath was GONE, and all the other “innocuous” symptoms — the painful periods, the painful sex, the irritable bowel, the mood swings, everything — was GONE. It has been six months now and I haven’t had any medical issues since.

Let this be a word of caution to you, ladies. Explore your birth control options well. There are other, safer methods out there (FAM is very good and straightforward, you can look it up). Our bodies are delicate, the hormonal systems in them aren’t designed to be played with so casually. The pill is NOT for everyone, though today’s doctors seem to think its the cure all for everything from rampant acne to irregular periods. So, if your doctor suggests the pill to you as an option, take a good, long, hard look. It’s much, MUCH better to have your heart skipping a beat from love instead of chemicals!

2. what qualities do you like in people?

Honesty, kindness, intelligence, and passion for the things they do

3. what is your passion?

Music. and writing!

4. Why are you blogging?

I blog because it is fun to keep a journal of sorts, and it also helps me get the word out about my music and other published works.

5. What is your dream?

To change someone’s life for the better with a song I wrote. I can think of nothing more profound or beautiful.

6. If you had to give away a million dollars, what would you do?

If someone gave me a million bucks and I had to give it away, I would set up a trust or something to help small schools fund their music programs with grants. I would also set up a scholarship foundation to help underprivileged, musically talented youth go to college.

7. Who or what inspires you?

That’s a hard one. The places and people I get inspiration from are different every day.

8. How old would you be if you didn’t know old you are?

Haha, some days I feel nineteen and other I feel like I’m fifty….

9. When it has all been said and done, will you have said more than you have done?

Another hard question. I suspect I will have said more than I have done, simply because I like to talk about things — music, good literature, life, beauty, etc. — although I hope it’s the other way around…

10. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?

I would go back to that moment in high school when I didn’t stand up for a friend of mine while the popular girls were talking smack, and I would tell them where to shove it. I regret that I stood by, silent, that day. I should have spoken up.

11. If someone offered you a million dollars for a night of sex, would you do it?

No way! At the end of my life, I want to be able to look back and know that I was faithful to my husband, that I maintained my self-worth, and that I kept my personal integrity. Those things — being able to stand yourself in the mirror — are so much more important to me than money… even if I really needed it! There are always other ways to get what you need that don’t involve sacrificing yourself.

11 Questions for Others!

1. If you could be any thing in the world — animal, vegetable, mineral, element, etc. — what would you be and why?

2. How did your passion find you?

3. Have you experienced any miracles in your life?

4. What thing have you been able to do, that you never thought you could?

5. If you were a book, what genre would you be, and why?

6. Have you ever surprised your family, and was it a good thing?

7. Do you have a “bucket list?”

8. What’s your favorite piece of advice?

9. What would your superpower be?

10. Money or happiness?

11. If you could paint a great work of art, what would it contain?

And the 11 Bloggers I Tag:

Well! I guess that’s everyone over there on my blog roll of Favorite People!

Postponement

I regret to inform you all that I’ve made the decision to postpone my next album. I’m just too busy at the moment with a bunch of things regarding family and health and the minutiae of life (not to mention my recording computer keeps acting up, so I’ll have to have some time to figure out an alternative). If I slapped it together now, it would be a lackluster product, and I refuse to put something less than my current ‘best’ out there.

So, we’re going to wait for a while longer.

Many apologies!

And it is Autumn again…

It is that time of year once again when we scramble to get all the hatches battened, the pantries filled, the barns ready, and the earth prepped for winter. Summer is gone, and it’s only a matter of time before the frost and snow and wind appear to chill our lives into a dreary, sleepy time of indoor activities.

I can’t say I’m not ready for it. I’m tired of the constant go-go-go of the working seasons. I’m tired of working until nine or so at night because the sun doesn’t go to bed until late — and then squeezing in another hour or so of tasks before my bedtime. There is both too much and not enough time to get everything done. I’m ready to slow down.

I have a woodworking project planned for the winter months. I have sewing and research and embroidery project to catch up on — that must wait until harvest is finished and the cows are brought home. I’m looking forward to songwriting time in the long, dark evenings; hot tea and cocoa; colorful leaves and fires in the wood stove. I even have house cleaning that I don’t have time to do right now, and so it, too, must wait (not that I’m any kind of domestic goddess to begin with).

As the days turn chill and the plants begin to die back, I look forward to the time when all the big stuff is done and I can pursue the meat and potatoes that make up the substance of my life.

Hearpe win!

This last weekend, I entered the Anglo Saxon hearpe that I built in an Arts & Sciences competition at an SCA event (Border War, in the Barony of Wealdsmere). It was the first time I have entered it in anything, and I was shocked…!

I won both adult categories for Best Documentation and Populace Choice!!

I received two beautiful, crimson, glass goblets and a lovely glass drinking mug, as well as many compliments on my efforts. Talk about a great, wonderful surprise!

Old Farm Truck

You’ve seen the mountains

And the green fields of home

You’ve gone many miles

And your tires are worn

you worked hard every season

A lifetime spent at twenty-five

A heavy load hauled in the back

The wind and weather stole your shine

But Every scratch tells us a story

Of how things used to be

CHORUS:

Back when we worked to put food on our table,

Back when we’d help a friend

When tractors and working men were the heartbeat of this land

Old farm truck take me back

Take me back there if you can

You’re sitting in the lot, now

The farming men are all gone

The fields are lying fallow

And only time continues on

But Every scratch tells us a story

Of how things used to be

Back when we worked to put food on our table,

Back when we’d help a friend

When tractors and working men were the heartbeat of this land

Old farm truck take me back

Take me back there if you can

Demon’s Music XIX: Spotlight

Maren stepped around to the front of the piano and reached for the dust cover. If she could just play, just one more time….

“Maren, what are you doing?”

She couldn’t quite get her fingers under the latch. She strained against the stuck dust cover. Cal left his side of the piano and cautiously approached her.

“Maren?”

She felt his lips against her neck and she couldn’t resist. “Go away, Cal,” she said.

Cal stood stock still for a moment, and she could feel his gaze burning into her. Then, after long moments, he backed away. The stage became silent, and she fought with the piano’s dust cover. Music swelled in her mind; she had to give it voice. The need was so potent she cried her frustration out softly as she scraped her fingers along the underside of the keyboard, searching for the latch to free the cover.

Something solid slammed into her side, knocking her back. She staggered, then slipped, and the floor came up sharply to meet her. “Sorry, Maren!” came Cal’s muffled voice. She shook her head to clear her vision.

CRACK!

Cal’s form straightened, and Maren saw he had a long implement in his hands. He swung it toward the piano, and the end sank with deadly accuracy into the case with another loud crack. The strings groaned under the impact, the unearthly sound whining in her head. Splinters skittered across the floor with each successive thump. Sledgehammer. The word came to her suddenly, and she felt as if she could breathe.

The ghost appeared at the edge of the curtain. “HOW DARE YOU!!” he thundered, and Maren cringed from the sound.

Cal paused. He spat on the piano. “This is my theatre, not yours,” he said quietly, and heaved the sledge against the case again.

The piano sagged against its supports. The ghost was suddenly at Cal’s side, and they were fighting over the hammer. Maren drug herself forward as the ghost sent Cal sliding across the slick stage floor. The ghost pursued him, his fingernails lengthening into razor-like claws.

“Maren, the lighter!”

She saw it hiding where it had gotten dropped and then kicked under the leg of the piano. The Demon’s gaze landed on her just as her fingers closed on the length of the lighter. Maren clicked the trigger twice and a bright little flame erupted out of the end. The ghost took two steps toward her, his sharpened hand extended as if to beckon her to him, and for a moment, her heart ached for the things he saw in her that she wished she saw in herself.

And she plunged the lighter into the broken wood.

At first, nothing happened. Fear gripped her gut and Maren looked up to see the ghost stalking forward with an evil grin. “You had your chance to come willingly,” he hissed. “Now, it’s time for a little… Persuasion.” His knifed nails clicked and scraped together, and chills ran up Maren’s spine.

Then the dry, old wood crackled into flame with a roar.

Maren hastily shoved herself back from the licking heat and landed on her rear with a thump. The ghost let out a guttural, inarticulate cry as the piano burst into flame. His silver skin rippled and boiled, and his form transformed into something sinister. The silver vaporized away as the piano burned, revealing a twisted, stunted frame with unnatural limbs and far too many teeth. Maren couldn’t scream as the distorted figure lurched toward her on unsteady legs.

Cal’s arms surrounded her from behind and he pulled her farther away. The piano had really gone aflame, the strings and metal groaning within the heat. Sparks floated up to wink out halfway up the cloud of smoke. The ruined ghost — the demon — slumped to the floor with a faint groan, then collapsed completely in a cloud of oily soot. The faint, blackened imprint of a hand remained on the light wood floorboards. The piano continued to burn, and burn.

Maren and Cal held onto each other while they watched the piano burn until it was no more than a heap of ash.

* * *

EPILOGUE:

Cal squeezed her hand, and she smiled up at his face. She’d been staring at the stain on the floorboards left from the piano-Demon’s destruction. They had spent so much time scrubbing it, but the shape of a reaching hand persisted, a faint shadow against the light colored boards… Maren felt mildly nervous and she scooted closer to Cal on the bench. His comforting presence helped keep her anxiety under control. Some day, she hoped to be strong enough to manage it all by herself. For now, however, his company was a welcome asset. She leaned over and placed a light kiss on his cheek. Little steps, she reminded herself.

The curtains opened and the spotlight fell on them to polite, applause. As usual, the Brisby theater was nearly full on the opening night of the Variety Show.

“Shall we?” Cal whispered in her ear.

She smiled, and struck the lighthearted notes of the first of many duets.

* * *

This is part of an ongoing story — catch up via the Serials page!

Journaling

I bought a couple of cheap spiral notebooks and I started keeping a journal again. I had forgotten how therapeutic it was to “detox” from the stress of everyday life through writing. Today I find myself feeling more like ‘me’ than I have in a while. Because there are some things you just can’t say out loud. There are some things you just can’t tell people without wounding them. There are things that you have to write — multiple times — before they can ever be spoken right. And I’m too kind and conscious of the power of words to just lay all that out on the table, raw and hurting. So, I tend to internalize (which isn’t healthy, especially when you get full-to-bursting).

Hence, the journal.

It’s nothing fancy. Just a 5×7 inch blue booklet (because blue is my favorite) with lined pages waiting to hold my fears, tears, and joys. Cost me a whopping $1.30 at the nearest Bi-Mart.

And right now, I think that’s just what the doctor ordered.