Heather S. Ingemar's Blog, page 13

Carols from the Past

Not the same, old, tired carols you’ve heard year after year…




Many thanks to the lovely Weinhard hotel for hosting me this afternoon.

Tagged: Christmas, holidays, medieval, music, performance

A Good Showing — Known World’s Got Talent

Such kind words! Though it appears I have not made it into the final round, having been bested by Aneleda Falconbridge’s “I Am Of The North,” I remain well-pleased and honored to have been a part of such an enjoyable competition.

Many thanks to all who voted for me. I wouldn’t have gotten here without you.

And a hearty congratulations to Miss Falconbridge and best wishes for continued success as she advances into the final round. Huzzah!

Tagged: Agincourt Carol, Heather Dale, Known World's Got Talent, music, performance, Society for Creative Anachronism, talent competition

Christmas Performance — Renaissance Style!

I have been asked once again to do an hour-long set at the lovely Weinhard Hotel for their part in Dayton’s Christmas Kickoff celebration.

Let it be said I’m not exceptionally fond of Christmas music — as a musician. (As an individual, many of them remain favorites for the associated memories and nostalgia.) So this year, in keeping with my newfound bardic interests, I’ve decided to mix it up a bit…

My set this coming Saturday will consist of primarily Medieval and Renaissance Christmas carols and Yuletide songs.

Me, being the generally strange person that I am, dressing up in funny clothes and playing antiquated music. I’m entertaining. Aren’t you intrigued?

Yes, it is ambitous. Especially as many of them are in Latin.

Yes, I may indeed be crazy. Especially since I plan to dress up in historical garb.

Yes, you will want to come see.

Saturday! November 30th! 3 to 4pm in the lobby of the Weinhard Hotel! Don’t miss it!

I will also have copies of my folk-pop-rock-esque CD, “Let Me Go,” available for purchase should you be looking for a unique Christmas gift.

Tagged: bardic, Christmas, holidays, medieval, music, performance, Renaissance

Storage

The other day I came home to learn that my husband had put the remaining baby things away, the ones I couldn’t bring myself to touch: the clothes, the changing table, the blankets, and care items.

He was worried I’d be mad at him for doing it. I’m not. It was rather cramped in our bedroom, and I’d been thinking it was time to go through everything anyway. It has been almost six months since Michael died, and I am not currently expecting another child. Those things were cluttering up our room with no purpose. They were like the proverbial elephant: covered up by a blanket J had put over them that first day back to spare us the tears and sorrow of looking at them, but they were still there. It was time to put them in storage, and a part of me is grateful for the fact that he did it, as I am uncertain as to whether I could have handled it without emotional drama.

And yet, it feels like we’re giving up.

Strange as it sounds, by packing all of Michael’s things away, it feels like an unsaid admission that being parents may not be in our future. A tacit expectation that there will be no more dreams.

It is utterly silly, because Michael’s things are not gone. They’re just in storage.

But it feels a bit like giving up. Like that moment in all of our lives when we are asked to put aside childish dreams and notions and grow up.

Bittersweet.

I am not sure how I feel. I think I should feel sad and upset, maybe even angry like J expected, but I just can’t quite muster it. I am so numb about the entire thing, like I’ve got nothing left to feel about the matter. Maybe that’s a good sign? Maybe that means I am finally ready to let go?

Tagged: aftermath, coping, grief, healing, loss, neonatal death

Storyteller

Coming soon!

Ideally.

This is something I’ve wanted to do for a while — put out an EP of bardic-style music by my own hand, an homage to my Celtic heritage, as well as the medieval history and roots of folklore I’ve come to love so much — and I’ve decided that it is time. It has been quite the journey getting here… I still have songs to write, polishing to do, and all the enjoyable work that goes along with readying a performance and fine-tuning the art of recording, but this is my dream for this next year.

By December 2014 at the latest, I hope to have this project completed.

The beginning of a new path.

The first steps back home.

Tagged: bardic, music, recording, songwriting, storyteller

Ten Things About My Music

There’s been this meme going around Facebook lately, where a poster gives you a number and you have to tell that number of things about you that other people may not know. If you comment on that post, you must continue the meme.

It’s been interesting reading all the things people have posted about themselves. I thought it would be fun to do a list for my music, and here’s what I came up with:

1. Last count I can play 10 different instruments.

2. I wish I were more extroverted so I could stage crazy-fun musical shenanigans like flash mobs or that guy who sang his fast-food order to the clerk, but I remain an introvert to my core.

3. I have much dismay that I cannot sing Tenacious D songs in polite company. Because playing acoustic guitars like you’re a Rock n’Roll God is epic with a capital E.

4. I wish I could write funny songs. For some reason it all comes out *very seriously.*

5. If I could do anything and be certain to make a steady income at it, I would probably still not want to be a rockstar/famous musical act. Infamous is much more my style.

6. I once sang “Yes, We Have No Bananas” (complete with a little dance) to a customer while I worked in the produce section at my first job. Her response: “So…. no bananas, then?”

7. I actually dislike playing amplified. I have to for many of the gigs and venues I play, but I it never sounds quite right and I hate fighting feedback. I lament the loss of acoustically-designed performance spaces, because unplugged is my bread & butter. If I could just play small house-concerts and the like, I would be a very happy camper.

8. Over my career-of-sorts, I have played in several jazz bands, several concert bands, two marching bands, two Celtic/Irish folk bands, a classical saxophone quartet, one concert choir, one small chamber orchestra, a “Jesus band,” and I did a very short stint in a Bluegrass band.

9. I once made $0.25 busking.

10. Best gig ever? When the college jazz band I belonged to performed at a WWII-themed Dance. It was like stepping back in time with all the ladies and gentlemen swinging on the dance floor.

Tagged: fun, lists, music, performance

Trying to Not Be Angry

As we get closer to the official “holiday season,” I am finding it increasingly difficult to not be angry. Several people in my circle of friends have had babies in the last couple weeks, and my friends who had children early in the year are all happy-go-lucky, posting pics and videos of their infants as they are cooed over by extended family. I am finding it very hard to not be pissy at them. They are, after all, entitled to enjoy their children. They get to celebrate joyful Thanksgivings and First Christmases and gleefully go shopping for toys. Because their children lived. Which is as it should be.

But I am angry.

Last year, my husband and I used our Christmas Letter to announce my pregnancy to the entire family. What can I say this year? “We had a terrible year and our son died right after he was born, but Merry Christmas!!” Yeah, right. Who wants to be the downer for someone’s “most wonderful time of the year”?

And that’s just the tip of the iceberg.

I probably sound ungrateful. I am not — I am thankful for my husband, the fact that I am healthy, the fact that I didn’t give up on my life when I most wanted to and came closest to it; I am thankful for our healthy cows and the warm house I live in and the fact that I can still play music. I am thankful we have so many friends who are more like the family I always wanted, I am thankful I am a productive individual. I am thankful — grateful and happy and blessed — for a lot of things.

But I can’t help feeling like I’m being targeted by the holidays in much the same manner Facebook has been targeting me for baby ads “for my 5 month old” (You suck, Facebook). Because the holidays are engineered to be child-centric, and this year, my arms are the emptiest they’ve ever been. True, I never had a child before and I still don’t have one, but my heart now knows what it’s missing. And I’m angry that we have to live through this, I’m hurt beyond words that there will be no First Christmas, there will be no happy Christmas Letter, and that there will be no family portraits and presents under the tree for my son. Oh, I am so angry that I am forced to sit on the sidelines and watch everyone else have all the fun. It’s like gym class once again, where I am the last one standing and no one wants to let me play, or those early school dances when the boy I liked showed up with someone else. I am a wallflower again and I am oh, so angry.

When it’s gym class or a school dance, you can leave. You can walk away and cool off, and I think the fact that the holidays are coming whether I want them to or not is partially why I am angry. I can’t get out of this! I can’t distance myself from this, I can’t go “cool off”! I am trapped and there’s no way out. I am drowning and I cannot breathe.

And I am angry like a wild animal restrained behind the bars of a cage.

I want out. I want to not feel angry, because I haven’t the right to feel that way. I want to be past this part of it, because I am miserable and I hate myself when I am angry. I had been doing so well, I was honestly feeling alright and truthfully happy about my friends’ joys, and lately it feels like I’m right back where I started:

Trying to not feel the way I feel.

Tagged: grief, holidays, loss, pressure, thankfulness

The Yule Dress Revisited

Back when my husband and I first started in the SCA, we went through what every newcomer goes through: history confusion. We started out with “early period” garb, and then I wanted something “later,” but I hadn’t done any research and was just going off the patterns I had on hand, altering things as I went to approximate the “idea” I held of what constituted “late period” garb.

For our second event (Yule Feast), I made a special dress:

Oh, there is sooooo much wrong here…

*ahem*

As I narrowed down what I wanted for my persona, my garb got better. About six months in, I quit wearing the infamous “Yule Dress.” And it sat in my closet.

This last month I looked at the sheer number of historical costumes I have made over the last year and realized I should consider getting rid of some of them…

But, I’m cheap. Because fabric is expensive.

And then, in my Tudor research, I found something cool: the kirtle.

Ah hah! I thought. I knew what to do with that Yule Dress.

I honestly can’t quite believe it worked. I chopped off the Yule Dress just above the side gores for the skirt, and cut the bodice pieces out of the “tippets” (or “wings” as some people like to call them) and the remaining fabric in the back. Many kirtles were side-laced (which is what this one is), and had embroidered accents across the top edge of the bodice.

The cool part? The only thing I bought was the lacing. A total of $4.

I lined it with some freebie white taffeta that I had to keep the cotton from sticking to itself and give it some body, and I reinforced the bodice with some canvas that I also had picked up for free somewhere.

Even though cotton is a fairly dubious fabric for the time, I now at least have a proper looking dress for my era and station as a sail-maker’s wife! At least until the linen goes on sale, next.

Until then… I think I’ll wear it at Yule…

Tagged: costuming, Sewing, Society for Creative Anachronism, Tudor

Pleased To Report… — SCA’s “Known World’s Got Talent”

I am so very pleased to report that the first round of voting for the “Known World’s Got Talent” competition ended last night, and it has been an awesome ride. I am even more pleased to report that….

…waaaaaait for it…..

I am in the Final Four!

I want to thank everyone who took the time to vote for me over the last couple of months, and acknowledge how appreciative I am of your support. This is the first widespread talent competition I have entered, and an international (!) one to boot, and I am humbled by the response. Thank you.

Now, you ask, where to from here?

As I understand it, the Society for Creative Anachronism has selected two judges — a founder and a bard (who happens to be none other than Heather Dale herself!) — to vet the four final entrants before selecting two to move onto the last stage. Those two entries will be announced sometime between now and December 1st. So stay tuned!

A few more words:

When my husband helped me create that video entry, I did it for fun, as a way to incorporate more period music into my repertoire and as an honorable representation of my rank as an Artisan for Wastekeep. I hoped that I would make the top four, but I did not go into it with a be-all/end-all attitude: I play and sing because I love it and get great pleasure from bringing a smile to others’ faces. Entering the Known World’s Got Talent competition was a way for me to fulfill that. So even if, in a few weeks, I find I have not made the Top Two, I remain happy, because I am a bard to my core, and I can rest assured that I have entertained people along the way.

Not to imply that I’m less than overjoyed at making the cut. Because, HOLY COW THAT’S AWESOME!

All I’m saying is that from here on out? It’s gravy.

Tagged: bard, medieval, music, performance, Society for Creative Anachronism, talent competition

Help Me Make the Top 4!

The competition for “Known World’s Got Talent” is heating up and I need your vote! You have until 11:59EST on Nov. 14th to click the “thumbs up” for me on YouTube. Tell everyone. You will forever have my gratitude!

If the “thumbs up” feature doesn’t load in the embedded player, you can also go here to click it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gUxSRI_JW8

Tagged: medieval, music, performance, sca, Society for Creative Anachronism, talent competition