Hattie C. Cooper's Blog, page 3

Collecting Those Relationship Blueprints

It would be so nice if in third grade we all sat down, opened our Relationship Textbooks, and started learning a set of skills. But, unfortunately, that shit doesn’t happen. In childhood we aren’t all taught the skills necessary to build solid, strong relationships. For the majority of us we learn how to “relationship” by what we see and observe in the relationships around us.

I know, personally, that my anxiety often rattles around in my brain with negative thoughts. My skull is a gumball ma...

Interview with Comedian Samantha Ruddy

If you haven’t heard of Samantha Ruddy yet you will soon enough. She is one of the funniest women on Twitter. She writes for College Humor. And she recently opened for Tig Notaro. Aka all around badass. I first came across her when I was one of the hundreds/thousands of people to retweet/favorite this gem:

To me, comedy writing and stand-up comedians are the pinnacle of confidence and intelligence. I am seriously in awe of stand-up comics. I wanted to ask Samantha about being a creative pers...

Discussing Mental Health on a First Date

The New York Times recently shared a questionthat was sent to their “ethicist.” The reader is back on the dating scene again after ending a lengthy relationship. The reader also lives with a complex mental health past and is uncertain about when if/when to discuss this past when entering new relationships.

What I love about this short little piece is that it acknowledges the grey area of getting close and intimate with another person. It explains:

“on dates, convention holds, you’re not oblig...

Talking About Feelings Over at xojane.com

I can’t tell you how big of an honor it is (and how surreal it is) to have a piece of my writing over at xojane. My essay, “I Didn’t Really Fall In Love Until After I Got Engaged” was featured a few weeks back. I’m still pinching myself. The piece explores a lot of the same themes I talk about here at the blog (love, fears, anxiety, and love).

xojaneis seriously the coolest. I mean, THIS is part of their credo to their contributors (aka beyond gorgeous). I want to tape it to my forehead any t...

Rebuilding that Confidence like an OG

As I sat and read through more and more of my statuses from 4, 5, 6 years back I found myself repeatedly asking, “Where did she go?”

I disappeared from my personal facebook page for almost all of 2015. I was learning to juggle in the new circus of freelance writing, was planning a wedding, and had already felt like facebook was no longer a place where I felt safe and/or happy.

I’ve slowly been stepping back into the shallow-end of the facebook pool, but the water is still a little cold. It st...

My Anxiety Was a Third Wheel on My Honeymoon

“I know I should be Zen and look at my nerves as a symbol of sensitivity and I should be grateful that we’re even here in the first place, but sometimes I get so MAD at myself.”

I sat in the airport terminal, Jared waiting patiently next to me, as the loudspeaker overhead announced they were boarding rows 1 – 20. It was almost midnight and we were about to get on ourplane to fly back home. We’d just spent a week in Hawaii on our honeymoon and my insides were churning like the ocean in the mid...

Win a Signed Copy of “The Anxious Girl’s Guide to Dating”

You guys. I’m getting married in a few days and life feels like I’m in the middle of that Fantasia scene where ostriches and hippos are ballerinas and music is blasting and my brain is a bottle of marbles. No joke? Last night I was wrapping presents at midnight and crying. I wasn’t even entirely positivewhy I was crying, I just was. Tissue paper, bags, ribbon, tears, tired tired tirwaitnowI’mlaughing.

BUT. I’m also doing a giveaway on Goodreads! Huzzah! Big life events right and left!

Good...

A Story From a Reader

This is a follow-up message, sent from the same reader who wrote the“Ask What You Want Wednesday”question on December 23rd. This content has been posted with permission from the writer.

Sadly, there wasn’t a happy ending to my story as I hoped there would be, but I hope that the end of this will provide some comfort and hope to your readers.

I spent Christmas doing the things I wanted to do, and I kept in touch with this man by texting each other once a day. I felt chilled out and positive, w...

February: The Month of Love

This month, according to grocery stores and card stores and all those commercials on the TV, is the month of love. Which, can be super annoying. You can feel like there’s pressure to buy your significant other all this crap-candy and giant teddy bears and if you’re single it feels like the universe is shoving it in your face and laughing as it runs away holding hands with its bae.

But, on the other hand, I like having an excuse to tell people who much I love them. Whether it’s my friends who...

One of the Weirder Moments of Eye Contact I’ve Had Recently…

Eye contact can be challenging for me sometimes. I know it’s important, I know it makes people feel heard and connected, butdamn it be awks sometimes. It’s incredibly intimate and makes you feelseen. It reminds you that, hey, you are right there. That’s you.

A good friend of mine got married this past summer and after the ceremony she pointed something out to me I hadn’t realized before.

“You have to maintain eye contact for a long time. Like, way too long,” she said, a fellow introvert who p...