Kyle Michel Sullivan's Blog: https://www.myirishnovel.com/, page 209
December 13, 2015
We-come is next...
I'm reworking a SF-Horror script I wrote that is set in the desert, about an alien that crash-lands on Earth and uses humans as batteries so it can send home a distress signal. It's being helped by Miner, a man it controls -- he brings it people; it keeps him alive. It's set up in some caves under a motel called the Welcome Inn, but the L is missing...hence the title -- WE-COME.
Everything is going great until some skateboard kids are lured to the motel to use its empty but pristine pool to play in. The pool is the relay dish the alien uses to shoot off its messages. Miner goes after the kids only to find they aren't such easy targets.
I've got the first act written, leading up to the point where the kids realize something is very wrong. One of them is hurt but they can't use their phones to call for help and their cars will not start. I've also added in a couple of victim-characters, to pump up the suspense angle. In the first draft, I did the A-B-C thing of introducing everyone and giving their back-story...and it was boring. Now?
Now I introduce the kids -- Danny, Catherine, Chill, Mario, Skye and Powell -- as they're driving through the desert en route to the motel, playing a kind of tag, Danny driving a classic convertible, Chill behind the wheel of a pickup. I envision it with aerial and tracking shots of the vehicles as Yanni's Aria plays over. Maybe the title sequence. Use the full four minutes. By that time, the audience will be completely on the kids' side without them saying a word.
Of course, if I do sell it, the director will probably ignore my suggestions and totally screw it up. I had that happen in the first rewrite job I did for a cheesy Corman series. I rewrote three episodes to add humor and humanity, but also did a three episode arc with the two main characters -- a professor and a sheltered schoolgirl; it was an erotic series meant for European distribution. Justine -- that's it. I rewrote episodes 7, 8 & 9, and the arc was for Justine and Professor Robson, and a couple of secondary characters.
Anyway, the director loved my work and shot it...and then, after it was done and on its way, told me he hadn't realized I added the arc till after it was edited, so he didn't do anything to enhance it. Even cut a few lines that would have helped. Maybe people will catch it, maybe they won't. But it was my second introduction to the blindness of directors.
The first one almost turned me into a murderer...but that story was visited in a much earlier post.
Everything is going great until some skateboard kids are lured to the motel to use its empty but pristine pool to play in. The pool is the relay dish the alien uses to shoot off its messages. Miner goes after the kids only to find they aren't such easy targets.
I've got the first act written, leading up to the point where the kids realize something is very wrong. One of them is hurt but they can't use their phones to call for help and their cars will not start. I've also added in a couple of victim-characters, to pump up the suspense angle. In the first draft, I did the A-B-C thing of introducing everyone and giving their back-story...and it was boring. Now?
Now I introduce the kids -- Danny, Catherine, Chill, Mario, Skye and Powell -- as they're driving through the desert en route to the motel, playing a kind of tag, Danny driving a classic convertible, Chill behind the wheel of a pickup. I envision it with aerial and tracking shots of the vehicles as Yanni's Aria plays over. Maybe the title sequence. Use the full four minutes. By that time, the audience will be completely on the kids' side without them saying a word.
Of course, if I do sell it, the director will probably ignore my suggestions and totally screw it up. I had that happen in the first rewrite job I did for a cheesy Corman series. I rewrote three episodes to add humor and humanity, but also did a three episode arc with the two main characters -- a professor and a sheltered schoolgirl; it was an erotic series meant for European distribution. Justine -- that's it. I rewrote episodes 7, 8 & 9, and the arc was for Justine and Professor Robson, and a couple of secondary characters.
Anyway, the director loved my work and shot it...and then, after it was done and on its way, told me he hadn't realized I added the arc till after it was edited, so he didn't do anything to enhance it. Even cut a few lines that would have helped. Maybe people will catch it, maybe they won't. But it was my second introduction to the blindness of directors.
The first one almost turned me into a murderer...but that story was visited in a much earlier post.
December 12, 2015
DP Synopsis
I'm open to feedback on this synopsis for Darian's Point...
--------------------------------
In 1910, on a tiny island off the western coast of Ireland, creatures known as the Old Women have killed a child, bringing terror to one and all. Now the island matriarch, MRS. O’BRIEN, must ask her only son, THOMAS, to honor an ancient pact that calls for his death.
That would be a problem, because Thomas lives in Boston, ten day’s journey away. However, he has already come to Ireland with his American wife, MARIAN. Things are tense between them due to her upper-class background and him being considered beneath her by her family. This journey is one last attempt to save their marriage. If this doesn't work, they plan to accept an annulment being offered by her father's friend, the Cardinal of Boston.
Mrs. O’Brien dislikes and distrusts Marion from the moment they meet, but her focus in on Thomas and convincing him of his duty to the islanders. The O'Briens have run this snippet of land for centuries and are the only ones who can fulfill the pact.
It began three thousand years ago, when the Dagda, the father of the ancient Celtic Gods, raped a woman of the Ua Briain clan after being given shelter. His wife, Morriggan, was furious and had the girl killed, but not before she gave birth to a son. This was a huge insult, and caused the Dagda to turn on Morriggan and wash his sins away in the waters of The Cliffs of Moher.
In answer, Morrigan used her powers of sorcery to form the sins into seven harpies, who lay waste to the west of Ireland. After many battles, four harpies were killed and a great many widows made before the Dagda brought about peace. In exchange for a promise to live in the caves of the Cliffs and leave Ireland's people alone, each hundred years a young man of the Ua Briain bloodline would be given to the remaining three harpies to feast upon...and Thomas is of that bloodline.
Only Thomas is now from a world that values science and reason, so he laughs at his mother’s claims...until he is attacked by one of the harpies in a crumbling tower known as Darian’s Point and understands he is bound by honor to fulfill the ancient pact. So with his mother’s help, he prepares himself to die.
Marian does all she can to prevent what she thinks is nothing more than an insane ritual murder. Then darkness comes...and a thick mist surrounds the tower...and she hears the shrieks of the ungodly creatures and realizes the legends are true. But she may be too late to keep the man she loves from being killed atop Darian’s Point.
--------------------------------
In 1910, on a tiny island off the western coast of Ireland, creatures known as the Old Women have killed a child, bringing terror to one and all. Now the island matriarch, MRS. O’BRIEN, must ask her only son, THOMAS, to honor an ancient pact that calls for his death.
That would be a problem, because Thomas lives in Boston, ten day’s journey away. However, he has already come to Ireland with his American wife, MARIAN. Things are tense between them due to her upper-class background and him being considered beneath her by her family. This journey is one last attempt to save their marriage. If this doesn't work, they plan to accept an annulment being offered by her father's friend, the Cardinal of Boston.
Mrs. O’Brien dislikes and distrusts Marion from the moment they meet, but her focus in on Thomas and convincing him of his duty to the islanders. The O'Briens have run this snippet of land for centuries and are the only ones who can fulfill the pact.
It began three thousand years ago, when the Dagda, the father of the ancient Celtic Gods, raped a woman of the Ua Briain clan after being given shelter. His wife, Morriggan, was furious and had the girl killed, but not before she gave birth to a son. This was a huge insult, and caused the Dagda to turn on Morriggan and wash his sins away in the waters of The Cliffs of Moher.
In answer, Morrigan used her powers of sorcery to form the sins into seven harpies, who lay waste to the west of Ireland. After many battles, four harpies were killed and a great many widows made before the Dagda brought about peace. In exchange for a promise to live in the caves of the Cliffs and leave Ireland's people alone, each hundred years a young man of the Ua Briain bloodline would be given to the remaining three harpies to feast upon...and Thomas is of that bloodline.
Only Thomas is now from a world that values science and reason, so he laughs at his mother’s claims...until he is attacked by one of the harpies in a crumbling tower known as Darian’s Point and understands he is bound by honor to fulfill the ancient pact. So with his mother’s help, he prepares himself to die.
Marian does all she can to prevent what she thinks is nothing more than an insane ritual murder. Then darkness comes...and a thick mist surrounds the tower...and she hears the shrieks of the ungodly creatures and realizes the legends are true. But she may be too late to keep the man she loves from being killed atop Darian’s Point.
December 11, 2015
I'm a pantser...who maybe ought to be a plotter...
I stole this from Hope Clark's
Funds For Writers
newsletter, this week --
The Importance of Planning in Self-Publishing
By Joel Friedlander
Fiction writers are sometimes divided into “plotters” and “pantsers” depending on how much advance thought they put into the development of their novels.
The “plotters” like to work everything out in advance. They may develop elaborate outlines, timelines, character portraits, diagrams of pivot points in their story, and know, even before they strike the first key, exactly what the story is and how it will develop.
“Pantsers” get their name from “flying by the seat of their pants." These writers might start with an idea, a scrap of conversation, a setting, or some dramatic situation, then sit down and start writing to see where the story goes, what characters show up, and how the whole thing will work out.
What about self-publishers? They can also be divided in terms of how they approach the publication of their books. Consider:
Planners
As soon as a planner gets going, they have specific dates for all their events. An author may have booked the blogs on which she’ll be appearing during her book launch several months away. She might locate vendors for the services she’ll need, set up a publishing company, and get all her “ducks in a row.”
Although all this preparation is impressive, planners may be driven by anxiety, remaining keenly aware of all the things that can go wrong, and try to avoid unplanned events disrupting the timeline.
Free Spirits
Free spirits approach publishing with a less structured approach, and are more concerned with the task in front of them, not with future events.
A free spirit author may be so absorbed by finishing his manuscript that he doesn't engage an editor in advance. While working with an editor, he may pay no attention to other tasks, content to wait until the moment when they are needed.
Although it sounds slower, these authors may be more open to serendipitous meetings and spur of the moment inspiration. Although they don't get the benefits of advance planning, they may have more fun in the process.
Questions Arise
Most people think that a book is a simple, commonplace object — words on a page, one page after another until you reach the end. What’s complicated about that?
But then, when you decide to publish yourself, the picture becomes murkier. You begin to realize there are many decisions that go into making a book. The questions start, and never seem to stop:
• Hardcover, paperback, ebook?
• How big a book?
• Where to sell, and for how much?
Then it gets even more confusing:
• What should I do first?
• How long will it take?
• How do I stay on track?
Planning to Succeed
Many authors are also teachers, business people, retirees, consultants, electricians, military, lawyers, doctors, and so on.
They have expertise in their own field, but they don’t know how book publishing works. They have no grasp of the whole book publishing process.
Ideally, you could have an expert sitting next to you as you plan your project to explain all the steps and when to do them. That's a great solution, and some authors end up hiring a book shepherd or publishing consultant.
But only a few do that. Most try to figure it out by reading, talking to friends, and asking questions.
Understanding the sequence of events in publishing a book should be your first task when you decide to self-publish.
So if you're thinking of publishing your own books, educate yourself first. Nothing will repay you as much as getting clear in your mind about how the process of turning a manuscript into a book works in the real world. You'll soon be a publishing "pro" yourself!
The Importance of Planning in Self-Publishing
By Joel Friedlander
Fiction writers are sometimes divided into “plotters” and “pantsers” depending on how much advance thought they put into the development of their novels.
The “plotters” like to work everything out in advance. They may develop elaborate outlines, timelines, character portraits, diagrams of pivot points in their story, and know, even before they strike the first key, exactly what the story is and how it will develop.
“Pantsers” get their name from “flying by the seat of their pants." These writers might start with an idea, a scrap of conversation, a setting, or some dramatic situation, then sit down and start writing to see where the story goes, what characters show up, and how the whole thing will work out.
What about self-publishers? They can also be divided in terms of how they approach the publication of their books. Consider:
Planners
As soon as a planner gets going, they have specific dates for all their events. An author may have booked the blogs on which she’ll be appearing during her book launch several months away. She might locate vendors for the services she’ll need, set up a publishing company, and get all her “ducks in a row.”
Although all this preparation is impressive, planners may be driven by anxiety, remaining keenly aware of all the things that can go wrong, and try to avoid unplanned events disrupting the timeline.
Free Spirits
Free spirits approach publishing with a less structured approach, and are more concerned with the task in front of them, not with future events.
A free spirit author may be so absorbed by finishing his manuscript that he doesn't engage an editor in advance. While working with an editor, he may pay no attention to other tasks, content to wait until the moment when they are needed.
Although it sounds slower, these authors may be more open to serendipitous meetings and spur of the moment inspiration. Although they don't get the benefits of advance planning, they may have more fun in the process.
Questions Arise
Most people think that a book is a simple, commonplace object — words on a page, one page after another until you reach the end. What’s complicated about that?
But then, when you decide to publish yourself, the picture becomes murkier. You begin to realize there are many decisions that go into making a book. The questions start, and never seem to stop:
• Hardcover, paperback, ebook?
• How big a book?
• Where to sell, and for how much?
Then it gets even more confusing:
• What should I do first?
• How long will it take?
• How do I stay on track?
Planning to Succeed
Many authors are also teachers, business people, retirees, consultants, electricians, military, lawyers, doctors, and so on.
They have expertise in their own field, but they don’t know how book publishing works. They have no grasp of the whole book publishing process.
Ideally, you could have an expert sitting next to you as you plan your project to explain all the steps and when to do them. That's a great solution, and some authors end up hiring a book shepherd or publishing consultant.
But only a few do that. Most try to figure it out by reading, talking to friends, and asking questions.
Understanding the sequence of events in publishing a book should be your first task when you decide to self-publish.
So if you're thinking of publishing your own books, educate yourself first. Nothing will repay you as much as getting clear in your mind about how the process of turning a manuscript into a book works in the real world. You'll soon be a publishing "pro" yourself!
December 10, 2015
DP is done...
It's now 100 pages long and reads much cleaner than before. I've sent it off. That's all I can do. I like the script and the story, and really do need to write the opening to it; the part that shows exactly what happened to start the whole curse. I have it worked out, but it'll be long if I put everything into it.
Something interesting about this is, by accident I learned I was spelling the ancient name of O'Brien wrong. I had Ui Briuin; it's Ua Briain. I thought I had it right and the site I'd happened onto was wrong, but some cross referencing said otherwise. So I've changed it in Return to Darian's Point, as well. I have a feeling one is just another version of spelling for the other and that's where I got it, but it doesn't matter. It's everything else that does.
I saw my eye doctor, today, and also found out my eyesight is still 20/20. Plus my bloodwork's results were posted on my doctor's site, and my cholesterol is down to 154. Everything else is screwy, to no surprise considering how poorly I ate while traveling, but that's really good. I'm trying to eat better, but it's Christmas and we're getting nothing but munchies from vendors we use. One sent us oranges that made amazing juice, but mostly it's cookies and candy. Oh, well...after the new year, all will be different.
Right.
Something interesting about this is, by accident I learned I was spelling the ancient name of O'Brien wrong. I had Ui Briuin; it's Ua Briain. I thought I had it right and the site I'd happened onto was wrong, but some cross referencing said otherwise. So I've changed it in Return to Darian's Point, as well. I have a feeling one is just another version of spelling for the other and that's where I got it, but it doesn't matter. It's everything else that does.
I saw my eye doctor, today, and also found out my eyesight is still 20/20. Plus my bloodwork's results were posted on my doctor's site, and my cholesterol is down to 154. Everything else is screwy, to no surprise considering how poorly I ate while traveling, but that's really good. I'm trying to eat better, but it's Christmas and we're getting nothing but munchies from vendors we use. One sent us oranges that made amazing juice, but mostly it's cookies and candy. Oh, well...after the new year, all will be different.
Right.
December 9, 2015
Sidetracked, again...
Someone in the UK wants to read Darian's Point so I was checking it for typos and realized it's written in a rather archaic style. So I'm halfway done with updating it. No changes, except having an argument between Thomas (the male lead) and his mother, Mrs. O'Brien, in Gaelic instead of English; that did feel necessary. The rest of it, I like. It's just my novel-esque descriptions of what's going on that had to be gotten rid of. By removing the mini-hyperbole, I've dropped 2 pages.
It's still an off-beat story. Gothic horror, of a sort, set in 1910 off the west coast of Ireland in a clash between old-world belief and new world reason. I still think Aidan Turner would be perfect as Thomas, and Ann Hathaway as Marion. That'd be fun...
I've been submitting scripts to Amazon but they're turning down everything with the same pat phrase -- Not right for our slate but if you do major rewrites you can resubmit it. I mean, they're turning down award-winning scripts in the space of a day, and I know I'm submitting the projects right. If they're going to be like that, they can kiss my ass. I've sent them my best stuff, already -- romantic comedy, horror, thriller, action...not sure what else I can do.
I'm still waiting to hear back on several other applications I've made for scripts or writing jobs. I need to start keeping a log of this crap.
I got some feedback on OT, and once more it's the first 2-3 chapters that are the problem, according to this guy. After that, he says it's like I got hold of the story and everything settled in, so I need to think up a way out of this mess. Maybe I'm trying too hard to keep it as a stand-alone instead of feeding off RIHC6. Maybe I just need to let that idea go and make it its own tale, with only general reference to what happened before, throughout the book. I need some time to think about this.
Hell, I need months worth of time just to catch up with myself.
It's still an off-beat story. Gothic horror, of a sort, set in 1910 off the west coast of Ireland in a clash between old-world belief and new world reason. I still think Aidan Turner would be perfect as Thomas, and Ann Hathaway as Marion. That'd be fun...
I've been submitting scripts to Amazon but they're turning down everything with the same pat phrase -- Not right for our slate but if you do major rewrites you can resubmit it. I mean, they're turning down award-winning scripts in the space of a day, and I know I'm submitting the projects right. If they're going to be like that, they can kiss my ass. I've sent them my best stuff, already -- romantic comedy, horror, thriller, action...not sure what else I can do.
I'm still waiting to hear back on several other applications I've made for scripts or writing jobs. I need to start keeping a log of this crap.
I got some feedback on OT, and once more it's the first 2-3 chapters that are the problem, according to this guy. After that, he says it's like I got hold of the story and everything settled in, so I need to think up a way out of this mess. Maybe I'm trying too hard to keep it as a stand-alone instead of feeding off RIHC6. Maybe I just need to let that idea go and make it its own tale, with only general reference to what happened before, throughout the book. I need some time to think about this.
Hell, I need months worth of time just to catch up with myself.
December 7, 2015
Questions never stop...
I'm at a point where I need Devlin to be released by the Metropolitan Police, but I can't just have it happen. It needs to make sense, and I couldn't figure out a good excuse. Not till I was doing my dishes and having a hell of a time cleaning a frying pan...when Reg and Dev started talking to each other...and it worked itself out.
Sir Monte, who's Chief Inspector on this case, still thinks Dev's helping the killer and is hoping he'll lead them to the guy. Of course, he's smart enough to know Dev will figure that out, so also uses Reg to keep him off balance. Knowing he may be putting Reg in serious danger...and, in fact, is. But he's out to stop a serial killer and will do anything he must to do it.
I'd written a chapter between Reg and Dev in Dev's hotel room...but it's now wrong. Reg wasn't being a cop who's also seen war in Her Majesty's Army; he was being a confused bloke. The conversation he has with Dev now shifts that, and a few harsh truths come out. And what's even better, Dev is completely off center, now. The mess with his mother's body slammed him harder than he realized, and he's halfway wondering if he pulled his crap with a man he suspected to be a cop just to make sure he wouldn't have to deal with it.
Well...when in doubt, Freud it up...
Sir Monte, who's Chief Inspector on this case, still thinks Dev's helping the killer and is hoping he'll lead them to the guy. Of course, he's smart enough to know Dev will figure that out, so also uses Reg to keep him off balance. Knowing he may be putting Reg in serious danger...and, in fact, is. But he's out to stop a serial killer and will do anything he must to do it.
I'd written a chapter between Reg and Dev in Dev's hotel room...but it's now wrong. Reg wasn't being a cop who's also seen war in Her Majesty's Army; he was being a confused bloke. The conversation he has with Dev now shifts that, and a few harsh truths come out. And what's even better, Dev is completely off center, now. The mess with his mother's body slammed him harder than he realized, and he's halfway wondering if he pulled his crap with a man he suspected to be a cop just to make sure he wouldn't have to deal with it.
Well...when in doubt, Freud it up...
December 6, 2015
Devlin Pope living up to his name...
I got into a nice long bit of back and forth with Dev about Underground Guy and finally came to the understanding that I'm holding him back. I've been trying to find excuses for his behavior...and those are still going to be in the story, because otherwise it doesn't make any sense...but he's not going to be a nice guy about it. He's going to be something of a monster. Not consistently, but every now and then a button is pushed and he turns into a raging animal.
The button to start the story off is, he thinks Reg is a cop out to trap some gay man into making a pass at him on the underground so he can arrest him. And Dev hates cops because they consistently let his father beat him, his brother, and his mother. In fact, the police would suggest they did something to set dad off on his rampage. Then when Dev's mother vanished, they were too willing to assume she just ran off, leaving her two boys behind; Dev, however, even at eight years old suspected his father killed her and disposed of the body. And the story now begins with a body being found in some marshland in New Jersey that might be his mother's, and all that old anger and fear is churned up.
That is what sets him close to the edge, this time, and seeing Reg do something to attract the attention of a man Dev recognizes as gay punches the button. He sets out to teach Reg a lesson about fucking around with people...and winds up in deep shit. In a foreign country. Where he doesn't have his attack dog of a lawyer available to defend him. And all hell tears loose in him.
Dev even had me set up what is about to happen to Reg by having him remember doing it to an undercover vice cop in San Francisco. Dev went to grab a piss just before his redeye flight was due to leave and the cop tried to get him to make a move. When Dev dismissed him, the cop's feelings were hurt so he tried to bust Dev...only to find out my guy don't take that kind of crap off nobody.
In short, in the first 10 pages Dev attacks a cop and gets away with it. That the story doesn't follow the expected path from that point...well, that's me and my characters.
I think Mr. Devlin Pope is going to be both interesting and scary, to say the least...
The button to start the story off is, he thinks Reg is a cop out to trap some gay man into making a pass at him on the underground so he can arrest him. And Dev hates cops because they consistently let his father beat him, his brother, and his mother. In fact, the police would suggest they did something to set dad off on his rampage. Then when Dev's mother vanished, they were too willing to assume she just ran off, leaving her two boys behind; Dev, however, even at eight years old suspected his father killed her and disposed of the body. And the story now begins with a body being found in some marshland in New Jersey that might be his mother's, and all that old anger and fear is churned up.
That is what sets him close to the edge, this time, and seeing Reg do something to attract the attention of a man Dev recognizes as gay punches the button. He sets out to teach Reg a lesson about fucking around with people...and winds up in deep shit. In a foreign country. Where he doesn't have his attack dog of a lawyer available to defend him. And all hell tears loose in him.
Dev even had me set up what is about to happen to Reg by having him remember doing it to an undercover vice cop in San Francisco. Dev went to grab a piss just before his redeye flight was due to leave and the cop tried to get him to make a move. When Dev dismissed him, the cop's feelings were hurt so he tried to bust Dev...only to find out my guy don't take that kind of crap off nobody.
In short, in the first 10 pages Dev attacks a cop and gets away with it. That the story doesn't follow the expected path from that point...well, that's me and my characters.
I think Mr. Devlin Pope is going to be both interesting and scary, to say the least...
December 5, 2015
Synopses for A65 and CK...
If anyone's willing to give me feedback on whether or not these work, I'd love it.
------------------------
CARLI'S KILLS
by
Kyle Michel Sullivan
Revenge can destroy the innocent as well as the guilty.
First comes the death of Anastasia and her married lover, set up to look like a murder-suicide. Then in a bar called Cantina Madriza, Carli picks up a damaged man named Grady, in a game of pool. She takes him home, drugs him, and shows him a video of him raping a young woman -- her daughter, Lara. Several other men were helping, and Carli is going to punish them all.
She leaves Grady staked to the ground in the middle of the desert to be eaten alive by ants and buzzards. When his body is found, there's not even enough left for fingerprints, but the county sheriff, Anson, suspects his death is connected to Anastasia's murder-suicide.
Now Carli focuses on the other men who raped Lara, a biker-gang led by Dax, who is also the local drug kingpin and owns Cantina Madriza. An ex-Marine named Zeke, who lost part of a leg in Afghanistan, tends bar there. In fact, all of Dax's men are damaged ex-military who were tossed aside by society. Carli snuck a bug into the bar when she played pool with Grady, and can now listen in on their conversations. She learns Anson is in league with Dax.
Dax and his boys make plans for the next day and leave, then Zeke closes the bar. He lives in a shack behind the building with his dog, Loki. He can't sleep so plays his guitar on the porch. Carli approaches him and they talk...and she realizes he was not one of the rapists. Interest grows between them.
The next day, Carli spies on a meeting between two of Dax's men and a college student who deals for them. Once the student is gone, Carli shoots both men, to disable them. But when she comes down to confront them, one is still able to fight her. She kills him then kills the other one the same way she killed Grady.
Afterwards, she cleans up, then calls her mother and asks her to use contacts to find out who the college student is. Finally, she watches a video of Lara sending her a Christmas greeting, indicating Carli has not been around much. Carli weeps.
She goes back to Cantina Madriza and talks with Zeke. He takes her to some rocks in the middle of the desert, a place where he loves to watch the sun come up, and they have an impromptu picnic. They learn a bit more about each other...and love begins to grow.
Later that day, Carli tracks down the college student, Chase, and learns Lara was set up to be raped as payment for a drug debt owed by Anastasia. Zeke was there and tried to stop it but was beaten back. Carli convinces Chase to work with her in sending Dax to jail.
En route back to the bar, Carli is confronted by Anson, who knows she is involved in the deaths but cannot prove it, yet. Afterwards, she goes to Zeke. He has a makeshift target range behind his shack, so she fires off a rifle to vent some anger. He reveals he knows she is Lara's mother, and he feels guilty about not stopping the rape.
They wind up in bed and Carli finally reveals she was a troubled teen who had Lara at an early age. Unprepared for motherhood, she left the girl with her own mother and joined the Army, finally becoming a sharpshooter in Afghanistan. She pretty much remained out of her daughter's life until the girl was raped by and driven to suicide after a video of it was posted on her college's website. Now her own guilt is gnawing at her.
Zeke reveals he's been disowned by his family and had nowhere else to go once he was done with rehab for his leg. Dax gave him a job and a place to stay...but he misses water and trees.
When the next two bodies are found, Dax thinks another gang has moved in on his territory so kills some of them. Anson is furious; that has brought in the State Police and FBI, and all hell is about to tear loose.
Carli and Zeke make plans to leave, but at work that night Zeke overhears Anson and Dax discussing Carli and realizes she killed three of his friends. Torn between protecting her and the horror of what she has done, he calls Carli and tells her to go away. But Anson and Dax overhear him and try to force him to tell them where she is hiding. He refuses and is brutalized.
But thanks to the bug under the pool table, Carli overheard it all and roars in to face them in a battle to the death...one neither she nor Zeke may survive.
----------
THE ALICE ‘65
by
Kyle Michel Sullivan
Books are ADAM VERLAIN’s life, so being an archivist of rare volumes for a London University is exactly right for him. But when they insist he go to Los Angeles to pick up an extremely valuable first edition of Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, he asks not to be sent because his father was killed while transporting another copy of the book up to Scotland, 15 years ago. But it is that or lose his job, so he agrees. Won’t even stay the night.
What he doesn’t expect is CASEY BLANCHARD, the top line movie star who inherited the book from her grandfather. She wants Adam to accompany her to a movie premier to show her ex-boyfriend, LANDO GRISSOM, this year’s butch action-movie hero, that she has moved on.
Problem is, Adam brought no clothes, so Casey's style guru – ORISI, a snarling boot-camp-drill-sergeant who never heard the word, “No,” -- has to slam him through an insane makeover (during which Adam winds up more than a little drunk) and into a five-thousand dollar suit. Then off they go, followed by a pair of paparazzi who will haunt their every move.
The premier is for the last movie Casey and Lando made together before breaking up, and they are quietly catty with each other about it but are doing well-enough...until the after-party at Lando’s Beverly Hills home. Their argument becomes vicious , so Adam comes between them...only to wind up ejected by Lando's bodyguards. Worried about Casey, he tries to sneak back in but almost drowns, ruins the suit, does his own verbal sparring with Lando, and nearly becomes dinner for a pet black panther named GERTRUDE. He also realizes why Casey wanted him with her – she knew that being seen with a guy who was such a bookish nerd, after having been on big, bad, beautiful Lando's arm, would be the perfect insult to the arrogant jerk.
By this point, all Adam wants is get the book and go home. But then he discovers that it has vanished...and that Gertrude has escaped and wants to be his girl...and that despite all the chaos and hurt and duplicity, he has fallen for Casey...even though he now suspects that her copy of the Alice '65 may be the same one that was stolen from his father...meaning her grandfather may have had a hand in his father's death.
Talk about tumbling down the rabbit hole...
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CARLI'S KILLS
by
Kyle Michel Sullivan
Revenge can destroy the innocent as well as the guilty.
First comes the death of Anastasia and her married lover, set up to look like a murder-suicide. Then in a bar called Cantina Madriza, Carli picks up a damaged man named Grady, in a game of pool. She takes him home, drugs him, and shows him a video of him raping a young woman -- her daughter, Lara. Several other men were helping, and Carli is going to punish them all.
She leaves Grady staked to the ground in the middle of the desert to be eaten alive by ants and buzzards. When his body is found, there's not even enough left for fingerprints, but the county sheriff, Anson, suspects his death is connected to Anastasia's murder-suicide.
Now Carli focuses on the other men who raped Lara, a biker-gang led by Dax, who is also the local drug kingpin and owns Cantina Madriza. An ex-Marine named Zeke, who lost part of a leg in Afghanistan, tends bar there. In fact, all of Dax's men are damaged ex-military who were tossed aside by society. Carli snuck a bug into the bar when she played pool with Grady, and can now listen in on their conversations. She learns Anson is in league with Dax.
Dax and his boys make plans for the next day and leave, then Zeke closes the bar. He lives in a shack behind the building with his dog, Loki. He can't sleep so plays his guitar on the porch. Carli approaches him and they talk...and she realizes he was not one of the rapists. Interest grows between them.
The next day, Carli spies on a meeting between two of Dax's men and a college student who deals for them. Once the student is gone, Carli shoots both men, to disable them. But when she comes down to confront them, one is still able to fight her. She kills him then kills the other one the same way she killed Grady.
Afterwards, she cleans up, then calls her mother and asks her to use contacts to find out who the college student is. Finally, she watches a video of Lara sending her a Christmas greeting, indicating Carli has not been around much. Carli weeps.
She goes back to Cantina Madriza and talks with Zeke. He takes her to some rocks in the middle of the desert, a place where he loves to watch the sun come up, and they have an impromptu picnic. They learn a bit more about each other...and love begins to grow.
Later that day, Carli tracks down the college student, Chase, and learns Lara was set up to be raped as payment for a drug debt owed by Anastasia. Zeke was there and tried to stop it but was beaten back. Carli convinces Chase to work with her in sending Dax to jail.
En route back to the bar, Carli is confronted by Anson, who knows she is involved in the deaths but cannot prove it, yet. Afterwards, she goes to Zeke. He has a makeshift target range behind his shack, so she fires off a rifle to vent some anger. He reveals he knows she is Lara's mother, and he feels guilty about not stopping the rape.
They wind up in bed and Carli finally reveals she was a troubled teen who had Lara at an early age. Unprepared for motherhood, she left the girl with her own mother and joined the Army, finally becoming a sharpshooter in Afghanistan. She pretty much remained out of her daughter's life until the girl was raped by and driven to suicide after a video of it was posted on her college's website. Now her own guilt is gnawing at her.
Zeke reveals he's been disowned by his family and had nowhere else to go once he was done with rehab for his leg. Dax gave him a job and a place to stay...but he misses water and trees.
When the next two bodies are found, Dax thinks another gang has moved in on his territory so kills some of them. Anson is furious; that has brought in the State Police and FBI, and all hell is about to tear loose.
Carli and Zeke make plans to leave, but at work that night Zeke overhears Anson and Dax discussing Carli and realizes she killed three of his friends. Torn between protecting her and the horror of what she has done, he calls Carli and tells her to go away. But Anson and Dax overhear him and try to force him to tell them where she is hiding. He refuses and is brutalized.
But thanks to the bug under the pool table, Carli overheard it all and roars in to face them in a battle to the death...one neither she nor Zeke may survive.
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THE ALICE ‘65
by
Kyle Michel Sullivan
Books are ADAM VERLAIN’s life, so being an archivist of rare volumes for a London University is exactly right for him. But when they insist he go to Los Angeles to pick up an extremely valuable first edition of Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, he asks not to be sent because his father was killed while transporting another copy of the book up to Scotland, 15 years ago. But it is that or lose his job, so he agrees. Won’t even stay the night.
What he doesn’t expect is CASEY BLANCHARD, the top line movie star who inherited the book from her grandfather. She wants Adam to accompany her to a movie premier to show her ex-boyfriend, LANDO GRISSOM, this year’s butch action-movie hero, that she has moved on.
Problem is, Adam brought no clothes, so Casey's style guru – ORISI, a snarling boot-camp-drill-sergeant who never heard the word, “No,” -- has to slam him through an insane makeover (during which Adam winds up more than a little drunk) and into a five-thousand dollar suit. Then off they go, followed by a pair of paparazzi who will haunt their every move.
The premier is for the last movie Casey and Lando made together before breaking up, and they are quietly catty with each other about it but are doing well-enough...until the after-party at Lando’s Beverly Hills home. Their argument becomes vicious , so Adam comes between them...only to wind up ejected by Lando's bodyguards. Worried about Casey, he tries to sneak back in but almost drowns, ruins the suit, does his own verbal sparring with Lando, and nearly becomes dinner for a pet black panther named GERTRUDE. He also realizes why Casey wanted him with her – she knew that being seen with a guy who was such a bookish nerd, after having been on big, bad, beautiful Lando's arm, would be the perfect insult to the arrogant jerk.
By this point, all Adam wants is get the book and go home. But then he discovers that it has vanished...and that Gertrude has escaped and wants to be his girl...and that despite all the chaos and hurt and duplicity, he has fallen for Casey...even though he now suspects that her copy of the Alice '65 may be the same one that was stolen from his father...meaning her grandfather may have had a hand in his father's death.
Talk about tumbling down the rabbit hole...
Weariness...
This set of packing and pickup jobs finally got to me, so I went to bed early, last night, and got up at 8:30 am to get some blood-work done then have my car serviced. Now it's nearly 4 and I'm still at the dealership having it taken care of. The parking brake cord snapped and I use that all the time so it has to be replaced.
I had to fast for the blood-work, last night, and I'm sure my readings are going to be crazy as hell once it's done...but I've been putting a lot of this off for the last couple months, thanks to work, so I'm not going to worry about it. I'll be eating much better for the next few months, and I'm checking with the Y near me to see if it has a pool. I can't swim, but I can do calisthenics in water up to my shoulders; that's a lot easier on the joints than running, jumping, or pumping iron.
I had a doctor's appt. yesterday and found I've put on 10 lbs during this 'bout of jobs. I ate nothing but fruit, yesterday, it so irritated me. I've been trying to lose weight so naturally I'm putting it on. Typical. And I got a flu shot, so that may have added to my fatigue, because I slept solid...yet I'm still ready for a nap, right now.
Doesn't help I have no idea how shot my finances are. And I have to find some way of paying taxes in a few days. I guess I need to find some way of making some extra money -- like writing some nice cheap scripts to sell for next to nothing. Like I keep talking about. Better put that into practice. I'll need to sell a lot to get myself back on track.
Since returning from Jackson, I've gone through Carli's Kills and The Alice '65 to check for typos and inconsistencies, saved them both and will be sending them out along with Return To Darian's Point and Find Ray T. I want them in top shape to submit to fellowships and and grants, not to mention competitions.
I check Mandy, Moviebytes, Stage 32, ISF, and InkTip every now and then for writing jobs, but not consistently...and I need to start doing that. I have a wide range of work to offer. I've never paid much attention to Craig's List but I did get a couple of storyboarding jobs off them so who knows?
I also get newsletters from writing foundations with jobs and information on grants and fellowships. I'm going to get something going, ASAP. I'm getting the feeling I may not be up here, much longer. Not sure why...but I've had weird moments of deja vu, lately, and those usually precede something massive in my life.
I just hopes it means good and not bad...
I had to fast for the blood-work, last night, and I'm sure my readings are going to be crazy as hell once it's done...but I've been putting a lot of this off for the last couple months, thanks to work, so I'm not going to worry about it. I'll be eating much better for the next few months, and I'm checking with the Y near me to see if it has a pool. I can't swim, but I can do calisthenics in water up to my shoulders; that's a lot easier on the joints than running, jumping, or pumping iron.
I had a doctor's appt. yesterday and found I've put on 10 lbs during this 'bout of jobs. I ate nothing but fruit, yesterday, it so irritated me. I've been trying to lose weight so naturally I'm putting it on. Typical. And I got a flu shot, so that may have added to my fatigue, because I slept solid...yet I'm still ready for a nap, right now.
Doesn't help I have no idea how shot my finances are. And I have to find some way of paying taxes in a few days. I guess I need to find some way of making some extra money -- like writing some nice cheap scripts to sell for next to nothing. Like I keep talking about. Better put that into practice. I'll need to sell a lot to get myself back on track.
Since returning from Jackson, I've gone through Carli's Kills and The Alice '65 to check for typos and inconsistencies, saved them both and will be sending them out along with Return To Darian's Point and Find Ray T. I want them in top shape to submit to fellowships and and grants, not to mention competitions.
I check Mandy, Moviebytes, Stage 32, ISF, and InkTip every now and then for writing jobs, but not consistently...and I need to start doing that. I have a wide range of work to offer. I've never paid much attention to Craig's List but I did get a couple of storyboarding jobs off them so who knows?
I also get newsletters from writing foundations with jobs and information on grants and fellowships. I'm going to get something going, ASAP. I'm getting the feeling I may not be up here, much longer. Not sure why...but I've had weird moments of deja vu, lately, and those usually precede something massive in my life.
I just hopes it means good and not bad...
December 3, 2015
Mark Twain on critics and criticism...
I believe that the trade of critic, in literature, music, and the drama, is the most degraded of all trades, and that it has no real value--certainly no large value...However, let it go. It is the will of God that we must have critics, and missionaries, and congressmen, and humorists, and we must bear the burden.
I don't mind what the opposition say of me so long as they don't tell the truth about me. But when they descend to telling the truth about me I consider that this is taking an unfair advantage.
One mustn't criticize other people on grounds where he can't stand perpendicular himself.
Experience has not taught me very much; still it has taught me that it is not wise to criticise a piece of literature, except to an enemy of the person who wrote it; then, if you praise it, that enemy admires you for your honest manliness, & if you dispraise it he admires you for your sound judgment.
A man with a hump-backed uncle mustn't make fun of another man's cross-eyed aunt.
I have nothing to add to the words of the master when it comes to pure snark...
I don't mind what the opposition say of me so long as they don't tell the truth about me. But when they descend to telling the truth about me I consider that this is taking an unfair advantage.One mustn't criticize other people on grounds where he can't stand perpendicular himself.
Experience has not taught me very much; still it has taught me that it is not wise to criticise a piece of literature, except to an enemy of the person who wrote it; then, if you praise it, that enemy admires you for your honest manliness, & if you dispraise it he admires you for your sound judgment.
A man with a hump-backed uncle mustn't make fun of another man's cross-eyed aunt.
I have nothing to add to the words of the master when it comes to pure snark...
