Lisa Rector's Blog: Writing and Beyond, page 10
February 15, 2015
Fighting Against Personal Rebellion
So with a wind chill of minus 15, and the surety of hypothermia and frostbite and death, I made the tough decision to stay home from church. I hate missing church, because every Sunday that I walk through the doors of that building and listen to the talks and lessons given, I come away a better person and fortified and strengthened for another week. With my baptismal covenants renewed by taking the bread and water, I am promised the guidance of the Holy Spirit to get me through the week. I come home clean and renewed.
As the wind roars, I did not make the decision lightly. And today I especially needed the cleansing power of the sacramental ordinance. Last night, I fell asleep with a heavy heart over issues that I constantly shove under the rug with the dust bunnies. But when charged with a specific task, I came up empty and realized, that once again, my denial has come back to haunt me.
I fought my demons all night. I had tortured dreams and promptings and restless legs. I suffered until I woke this morning, wanting blessed relief, but also knowing that I didn’t feel ready to go to 9 a.m. church and take those sacred emblems. Maybe it was with relief, and certainly with a bit dismay, that I looked out the window and looked at the thermostat.
I would have time.
Time to study and work through what I needed.
I was given the information, and found a fabulous talk by Elder David A. Bednar. The knowledge has been absorbed. But now the implementation. One thing I learned about gaining knowledge, you don’t truly learn it until you share it. So I am going to share it, and then every faucet will be ingrained in my head. That’s why teachers are the best students.
They learn more than their pupils.
Converted unto the Lord is the talk I used.
I have always had a strong testimony of my Savior Jesus Christ. No one could stand in front of me and tell me that he doesn’t exist in a way I would believe him. That foundation is firm. I am unshaken. I will not be moved. But what I struggle with is: I don’t want to do it. The, I am a whiny child, of which I am (a child of my Father in Heaven), and I just don’t want to do it. I want to be left alone. Pamper me. I am a baby. I want someone to change my diaper and feed me mashed baby food.
I struggle so much.
Life gets me run down, beaten up, torn to pieces. Give me serenity and just leave me to my own devices. I contemplated becoming so engrossed in my own fantasy world that the real world would just pass me by.
But do you know how much I would give up? Everything—except my selfish self.
So I laid out the facts: I have a testimony. But I don’t want to do anything because I’m lazy and selfish. I haven’t been able to get over certain hurdles that I don’t want to get into on this blog post. I don’t know if I have felt that change in my heart because if I felt that change in my heart, why would I feel so guilty and go to bed, after crying on my knees, feeling worthless.
Well, I know one thing. God heard every single one of my cries. He always does. How could I be such a lucky child and still be such a brat?
His love is amazing.
Elder Bednar’s talk walked me through the steps.
Number one: What is a testimony? “A testimony is personal knowledge of spiritual truth obtained by revelation.”
But once we have that testimony, then much is required. That is why it is so hard being a Latter-day Saint—being a Christian. We have now become accountable. “Testimony brings increased personal accountability and is a source of purpose, assurance, and joy.”
I’m not going to get into the steps of gaining a personal testimony of the Lord Jesus Christ, but read the talk and it will explain everything.
Number two:What comes next? We are converted. “True conversion brings a change in one’s beliefs, heart, and life to accept and conform to the will of God (see Acts 3:19; 3 Nephi 9:20) and includes a conscious commitment to become a disciple of Christ.”
This has me a bit worried because of my above mentioned issues. My feeling of a hardened heart for one. How conformed to the will of God am I with a seed of rebellion in my heart?
Last week I had an epiphany in relation to our agency. Rules make us want to rebel. As soon as your mother or father tells you: you can’t do that, you want to do it even more than ever. But we have rules for our safety. That’s why religion seems so restrictive. The “rules” (principles and ordinances and commandments) are for our spiritual safety. But in reality, they keep us free from the chains that Satan can bind us with. Scary, true stuff.
“Conversion is an enlarging, a deepening, and a broadening of the undergirding base of testimony. It is the result of revelation from God, accompanied by individual repentance, obedience, and diligence. Any honest seeker of truth can become converted by experiencing the mighty change of heart and being spiritually born of God (see Alma 5:12–14). As we honor the ordinances and covenants of salvation and exaltation (see D&C 20:25), “press forward with a steadfastness in Christ” (2 Nephi 31:20), and endure in faith to the end (see D&C 14:7), we become new creatures in Christ (see 2 Corinthians 5:17). Conversion is an offering of self, of love, and of loyalty we give to God in gratitude for the gift of testimony.”
“Knowing by the power of the Holy Ghost that Jesus is the Christ is important and necessary. But earnestly coming unto Him and giving our whole souls as an offering requires much more than merely knowing. Conversion requires all of our heart, all of our might, and all of our mind and strength (see D&C 4:2).”
That’s Number three: Enduring to the end. Which entails A LOT! I’m exhausted all ready. Enduring to the end is BIG time responsibility. And why do we do it? Well, if you have a testimony, then you know we do it because of the eternal promise of hope that we can be saved and live with our Father in Heaven again. So we have got to get on the ball.
So I think that if I am truly converted, I shouldn't want to do bad things. And yes I know, we all have human frailties and carnal impulses, but I am talking about a deep down spiritual, I don’t want to, and not because I am physically incapable. Consider what happened to King Benjamin’s people in the Book of Mormon. After hearing his stirring sermon, this is what they had to say. “Yea, we believe all the words which thou hast spoken unto us; and also, we know of their surety and truth, because of the Spirit of the Lord Omnipotent, which has wrought a mighty change in us, or in our hearts, that we have no more disposition to do evil, but to do good continually” (Mosiah 5:2).
Elder Bednar said of King Benjamin’s people, “Accepting the words spoken, gaining a testimony of their truthfulness, and exercising faith in Christ produced a mighty change of heart and a firm determination to improve and become better.”
If I accept the words of the scriptures and our prophet and apostles, have a sure testimony, and have faith in Jesus Christ, then why does my heart feel so hardened over some things? I do want to improve and become better. But I want to ignore that one major issue.
That’s a major stumbling block.
So to rub my guilt a little deeper, here’s what else Elder Bednar continued to say. “The key characteristics associated with conversion are experiencing a mighty change in our hearts, having a disposition to do good continually, going forward in the path of duty, walking circumspectly before God, keeping the commandments, and serving with unwearied diligence. Clearly, these faithful souls had become deeply devoted to the Lord and His teachings.”
I hang my head.
And fall to my knees.
Am I not deeply devoted?
I can’t do any of this on my own.
I kept reading, because Elder Bednar gives us hope and the how to.
“For many of us, conversion is an ongoing process and not a onetime event that results from a powerful or dramatic experience. Line upon line and precept upon precept, gradually and almost imperceptibly, our motives, our thoughts, our words, and our deeds become aligned with the will of God. Conversion unto the Lord requires both persistence and patience.”
Maybe the fact that I recognize my faults, and have a desire to change my stubborn nature is a good starting place.
“Testimony is the beginning of and a prerequisite to continuing conversion. Testimony is a point of departure; it is not an ultimate destination. Strong testimony is the foundation upon which conversion is established.”
I am glad that at least I have a strong foundation. But I still have a long way to go. Luckily conversion is a life long journey.
“Testimony alone is not and will not be enough to protect us in the latter-day storm of darkness and evil in which we are living. Testimony is important and necessary but not sufficient to provide the spiritual strength and protection we need. Some members of the Church with testimonies have wavered and fallen away. Their spiritual knowledge and commitment did not measure up to the challenges they faced.”
There is an example of a people in the Book of Mormon who buried their weapons of rebellion after they received a testimony and were converted. Here’s what Elder Bednar said about them.
They never did fall away and surrendered “the weapons of their rebellion, that they did not fight against God any more.” To set aside cherished “weapons of rebellion” such as selfishness, pride, and disobedience requires more than merely believing and knowing. Conviction, humility, repentance, and submissiveness precedethe abandonment of our weapons of rebellion. Do you and I still possess weapons of rebellion that keep us from becoming converted unto the Lord? If so, then we need to repent now.
They set aside their weapons of rebellion—their pride, selfishness, and disobedience. We have to be humble to do this. And we have to repent.
And then we have to do everything we can to remain close to the spirit. If we looked at the example of the Ten Virgins (Matthew 25:4-9) we learn that the oil of conversion cannot be borrowed. It is acquired one drop at a time—“line upon line [and] precept upon precept” (2 Nephi 28:30), patiently and persistently. No shortcut is available; no last-minute flurry of preparation is possible.
“Wherefore, be faithful, praying always, having your lamps trimmed and burning, and oil with you, that you may be ready at the coming of the Bridegroom” (D&C 33:17).
So what did I ultimately learn? My testimony is a sure foundation, but my conversion is ongoing. As long as I don’t stop fighting, as long as I make small incremental changes toward choosing the right and continuing to endure to the end, my heart will soften and change. I still might fight against the things I don’t want to do. But the atonement is there to relief us of our burdens, to wash away our guilt. I don’t need to feel guilty if I repent and try again. Tomorrow is always another day. God loves us, and he doesn't want us to fail in our attempts at enjoying life and being happy. And he wants us to return to him again.
I just feel so much better knowing that my testimony is a jumping off point. A new beginning. We were not meant to be perfect in this life. I am so glad that I can learn more every single day.
My stubborn nature can change.
My heart can soften.
As long as I keep trying.
As the wind roars, I did not make the decision lightly. And today I especially needed the cleansing power of the sacramental ordinance. Last night, I fell asleep with a heavy heart over issues that I constantly shove under the rug with the dust bunnies. But when charged with a specific task, I came up empty and realized, that once again, my denial has come back to haunt me.
I fought my demons all night. I had tortured dreams and promptings and restless legs. I suffered until I woke this morning, wanting blessed relief, but also knowing that I didn’t feel ready to go to 9 a.m. church and take those sacred emblems. Maybe it was with relief, and certainly with a bit dismay, that I looked out the window and looked at the thermostat.
I would have time.
Time to study and work through what I needed.
I was given the information, and found a fabulous talk by Elder David A. Bednar. The knowledge has been absorbed. But now the implementation. One thing I learned about gaining knowledge, you don’t truly learn it until you share it. So I am going to share it, and then every faucet will be ingrained in my head. That’s why teachers are the best students.
They learn more than their pupils.
Converted unto the Lord is the talk I used.
I have always had a strong testimony of my Savior Jesus Christ. No one could stand in front of me and tell me that he doesn’t exist in a way I would believe him. That foundation is firm. I am unshaken. I will not be moved. But what I struggle with is: I don’t want to do it. The, I am a whiny child, of which I am (a child of my Father in Heaven), and I just don’t want to do it. I want to be left alone. Pamper me. I am a baby. I want someone to change my diaper and feed me mashed baby food.
I struggle so much.
Life gets me run down, beaten up, torn to pieces. Give me serenity and just leave me to my own devices. I contemplated becoming so engrossed in my own fantasy world that the real world would just pass me by.
But do you know how much I would give up? Everything—except my selfish self.
So I laid out the facts: I have a testimony. But I don’t want to do anything because I’m lazy and selfish. I haven’t been able to get over certain hurdles that I don’t want to get into on this blog post. I don’t know if I have felt that change in my heart because if I felt that change in my heart, why would I feel so guilty and go to bed, after crying on my knees, feeling worthless.
Well, I know one thing. God heard every single one of my cries. He always does. How could I be such a lucky child and still be such a brat?
His love is amazing.
Elder Bednar’s talk walked me through the steps.
Number one: What is a testimony? “A testimony is personal knowledge of spiritual truth obtained by revelation.”
But once we have that testimony, then much is required. That is why it is so hard being a Latter-day Saint—being a Christian. We have now become accountable. “Testimony brings increased personal accountability and is a source of purpose, assurance, and joy.”
I’m not going to get into the steps of gaining a personal testimony of the Lord Jesus Christ, but read the talk and it will explain everything.
Number two:What comes next? We are converted. “True conversion brings a change in one’s beliefs, heart, and life to accept and conform to the will of God (see Acts 3:19; 3 Nephi 9:20) and includes a conscious commitment to become a disciple of Christ.”
This has me a bit worried because of my above mentioned issues. My feeling of a hardened heart for one. How conformed to the will of God am I with a seed of rebellion in my heart?
Last week I had an epiphany in relation to our agency. Rules make us want to rebel. As soon as your mother or father tells you: you can’t do that, you want to do it even more than ever. But we have rules for our safety. That’s why religion seems so restrictive. The “rules” (principles and ordinances and commandments) are for our spiritual safety. But in reality, they keep us free from the chains that Satan can bind us with. Scary, true stuff.
“Conversion is an enlarging, a deepening, and a broadening of the undergirding base of testimony. It is the result of revelation from God, accompanied by individual repentance, obedience, and diligence. Any honest seeker of truth can become converted by experiencing the mighty change of heart and being spiritually born of God (see Alma 5:12–14). As we honor the ordinances and covenants of salvation and exaltation (see D&C 20:25), “press forward with a steadfastness in Christ” (2 Nephi 31:20), and endure in faith to the end (see D&C 14:7), we become new creatures in Christ (see 2 Corinthians 5:17). Conversion is an offering of self, of love, and of loyalty we give to God in gratitude for the gift of testimony.”
“Knowing by the power of the Holy Ghost that Jesus is the Christ is important and necessary. But earnestly coming unto Him and giving our whole souls as an offering requires much more than merely knowing. Conversion requires all of our heart, all of our might, and all of our mind and strength (see D&C 4:2).”
That’s Number three: Enduring to the end. Which entails A LOT! I’m exhausted all ready. Enduring to the end is BIG time responsibility. And why do we do it? Well, if you have a testimony, then you know we do it because of the eternal promise of hope that we can be saved and live with our Father in Heaven again. So we have got to get on the ball.
So I think that if I am truly converted, I shouldn't want to do bad things. And yes I know, we all have human frailties and carnal impulses, but I am talking about a deep down spiritual, I don’t want to, and not because I am physically incapable. Consider what happened to King Benjamin’s people in the Book of Mormon. After hearing his stirring sermon, this is what they had to say. “Yea, we believe all the words which thou hast spoken unto us; and also, we know of their surety and truth, because of the Spirit of the Lord Omnipotent, which has wrought a mighty change in us, or in our hearts, that we have no more disposition to do evil, but to do good continually” (Mosiah 5:2).
Elder Bednar said of King Benjamin’s people, “Accepting the words spoken, gaining a testimony of their truthfulness, and exercising faith in Christ produced a mighty change of heart and a firm determination to improve and become better.”
If I accept the words of the scriptures and our prophet and apostles, have a sure testimony, and have faith in Jesus Christ, then why does my heart feel so hardened over some things? I do want to improve and become better. But I want to ignore that one major issue.
That’s a major stumbling block.
So to rub my guilt a little deeper, here’s what else Elder Bednar continued to say. “The key characteristics associated with conversion are experiencing a mighty change in our hearts, having a disposition to do good continually, going forward in the path of duty, walking circumspectly before God, keeping the commandments, and serving with unwearied diligence. Clearly, these faithful souls had become deeply devoted to the Lord and His teachings.”
I hang my head.
And fall to my knees.
Am I not deeply devoted?
I can’t do any of this on my own.
I kept reading, because Elder Bednar gives us hope and the how to.
“For many of us, conversion is an ongoing process and not a onetime event that results from a powerful or dramatic experience. Line upon line and precept upon precept, gradually and almost imperceptibly, our motives, our thoughts, our words, and our deeds become aligned with the will of God. Conversion unto the Lord requires both persistence and patience.”
Maybe the fact that I recognize my faults, and have a desire to change my stubborn nature is a good starting place.
“Testimony is the beginning of and a prerequisite to continuing conversion. Testimony is a point of departure; it is not an ultimate destination. Strong testimony is the foundation upon which conversion is established.”
I am glad that at least I have a strong foundation. But I still have a long way to go. Luckily conversion is a life long journey.
“Testimony alone is not and will not be enough to protect us in the latter-day storm of darkness and evil in which we are living. Testimony is important and necessary but not sufficient to provide the spiritual strength and protection we need. Some members of the Church with testimonies have wavered and fallen away. Their spiritual knowledge and commitment did not measure up to the challenges they faced.”
There is an example of a people in the Book of Mormon who buried their weapons of rebellion after they received a testimony and were converted. Here’s what Elder Bednar said about them.
They never did fall away and surrendered “the weapons of their rebellion, that they did not fight against God any more.” To set aside cherished “weapons of rebellion” such as selfishness, pride, and disobedience requires more than merely believing and knowing. Conviction, humility, repentance, and submissiveness precedethe abandonment of our weapons of rebellion. Do you and I still possess weapons of rebellion that keep us from becoming converted unto the Lord? If so, then we need to repent now.
They set aside their weapons of rebellion—their pride, selfishness, and disobedience. We have to be humble to do this. And we have to repent.
And then we have to do everything we can to remain close to the spirit. If we looked at the example of the Ten Virgins (Matthew 25:4-9) we learn that the oil of conversion cannot be borrowed. It is acquired one drop at a time—“line upon line [and] precept upon precept” (2 Nephi 28:30), patiently and persistently. No shortcut is available; no last-minute flurry of preparation is possible.
“Wherefore, be faithful, praying always, having your lamps trimmed and burning, and oil with you, that you may be ready at the coming of the Bridegroom” (D&C 33:17).
So what did I ultimately learn? My testimony is a sure foundation, but my conversion is ongoing. As long as I don’t stop fighting, as long as I make small incremental changes toward choosing the right and continuing to endure to the end, my heart will soften and change. I still might fight against the things I don’t want to do. But the atonement is there to relief us of our burdens, to wash away our guilt. I don’t need to feel guilty if I repent and try again. Tomorrow is always another day. God loves us, and he doesn't want us to fail in our attempts at enjoying life and being happy. And he wants us to return to him again.
I just feel so much better knowing that my testimony is a jumping off point. A new beginning. We were not meant to be perfect in this life. I am so glad that I can learn more every single day.
My stubborn nature can change.
My heart can soften.
As long as I keep trying.
February 7, 2015
Valentine's Week Kindle Countdown Sale!
Blog Day 6 for Master of Lies (Chronicles of the Half-Emrys, #1)
We are on to the sixth blog day. Tomorrow, Sunday the 8th, starts my Kindle Countdown sale. If you haven’t had a chance to read my debut novel, now you have 36 hours to down load it for 99 cents. The price will continue to rise all week until February 14thwhen it will be back to its regular price of $4.99.
For today’s Master of Lies tidbit:
What are the major themes in my book?
One aspect in my novels is the indifference in the immortal dragon realm of Gorlassar, a supposedly a perfect world where there is no evil. The darkness cannot dwell there or enter. When faced with the opportunity to help the mortals, a corrupt race in a world of darkness, many Emrys shirked the idea.
A lesser race should be left to their lesser fate. Right?
So there is darkness creeping around in the mortal world. This is in contrast to the light that is in the Emrys. And the Half-Emrys (beings with a mortal and immortal parent) share both traits. Thus lends to the theme of: The darkness that is in us all.
And the light.
And the fight between good and evil. (Cue Star Wars music.)
This quote from Harry Potter fits the theme of my chronicles. Sirius tells Harry: “You’re not a bad person. You’re a very good person, who bad things have happened to. Besides, the world isn’t split into good people and Death Eaters. We’ve all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That’s who we really are.”
Agency is a huge aspect in my books and despite having darkness inside you, it is your choices that define you. (Insert Dumbledore quote: “It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.”)
Here’s my enticing back cover blurb:
Mastering the lies is easy if you don’t have to wrestle against your own darkness . . .
Unaware of her immortal heritage, the truth concealed from her, Ahnalyn learns she’s a child of two worlds—a half-Emrys with the ability to wield the light and the dark power. Aneirin, a Son of Light, has his own reasons for leaving the immortal dragon realm. Defying the High Council, he risks exile—risks being tainted by the corrupt mortal world Ahnalyn is a part of.
As Aneirin’s life becomes entwined with Ahnalyn’s future, he is certain of one thing: Ahnalyn belongs with the immortal Emrys. But doubt and fear shroud Ahnalyn as the painful truths of her past unfold. Succumbing to the darkness lurking inside her is the easy, simple path. But under the dark power, Ahnalyn would be forbidden to enter the immortal realm and would be lost to all those she loves—forever.
Master of Lies is the first book in the Chronicles of the Half-Emrys, a high fantasy novel.
We are on to the sixth blog day. Tomorrow, Sunday the 8th, starts my Kindle Countdown sale. If you haven’t had a chance to read my debut novel, now you have 36 hours to down load it for 99 cents. The price will continue to rise all week until February 14thwhen it will be back to its regular price of $4.99.
For today’s Master of Lies tidbit:
What are the major themes in my book?
One aspect in my novels is the indifference in the immortal dragon realm of Gorlassar, a supposedly a perfect world where there is no evil. The darkness cannot dwell there or enter. When faced with the opportunity to help the mortals, a corrupt race in a world of darkness, many Emrys shirked the idea.
A lesser race should be left to their lesser fate. Right?
So there is darkness creeping around in the mortal world. This is in contrast to the light that is in the Emrys. And the Half-Emrys (beings with a mortal and immortal parent) share both traits. Thus lends to the theme of: The darkness that is in us all.
And the light.
And the fight between good and evil. (Cue Star Wars music.)
This quote from Harry Potter fits the theme of my chronicles. Sirius tells Harry: “You’re not a bad person. You’re a very good person, who bad things have happened to. Besides, the world isn’t split into good people and Death Eaters. We’ve all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That’s who we really are.”
Agency is a huge aspect in my books and despite having darkness inside you, it is your choices that define you. (Insert Dumbledore quote: “It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.”)
Here’s my enticing back cover blurb:
Mastering the lies is easy if you don’t have to wrestle against your own darkness . . .
Unaware of her immortal heritage, the truth concealed from her, Ahnalyn learns she’s a child of two worlds—a half-Emrys with the ability to wield the light and the dark power. Aneirin, a Son of Light, has his own reasons for leaving the immortal dragon realm. Defying the High Council, he risks exile—risks being tainted by the corrupt mortal world Ahnalyn is a part of.
As Aneirin’s life becomes entwined with Ahnalyn’s future, he is certain of one thing: Ahnalyn belongs with the immortal Emrys. But doubt and fear shroud Ahnalyn as the painful truths of her past unfold. Succumbing to the darkness lurking inside her is the easy, simple path. But under the dark power, Ahnalyn would be forbidden to enter the immortal realm and would be lost to all those she loves—forever.
Master of Lies is the first book in the Chronicles of the Half-Emrys, a high fantasy novel.
January 24, 2015
Delicious Characters
Blog Day 5 for Master of Lies (Chronicles of the Half-Emrys, #1)
Well, it seems I became so caught up in the momentum of revisions for the second book that I have slipped behind in my blog posts. Book Two, The Two Masters, is moving right along. But now for a fun blog day with attractive pictures.
Who did I base my characters on?
Well, my initial basis for my Emrys was the LOTR elves. Alas, my Emrys do not have pointy ears. I needed immortals with a flowing, graceful form, strong, lean bodies, and creamy, unblemished skin. Tolkien's elves were a perfect reference.
I pictured the tall, thin frame of Legolas and his mysterious charisma. In the beginning, he was my Aneirin. The constantly furrowed look of Aneirin's brows are exactly how I pictured him in this picture.
Galadriel was my Meinwen. The way she moved with grace and her ethereal air was exactly how I pictured my High Emrys.
I stumbled across a “real life” Disney picture of Jane of the jungle. I knew I had found my Ahnalyn with her green eyes and her tiny nose and innocent look. Adorable. But with a hidden determination.
Okay, the next character is my villain. Caedryn. He is actually quite handsome, though evil. Can you guess who? Pale skin, dark hair. Witty. Follow the link here to be surprised.
My real gem. When I found my Catrin, I knew it was her. And readers will be pleased to learn more about Catrin in book 2. She moves center stage as a main protagonist in book 3.
Gemma Ward. She played the lovely role of Tamara in Pirates of the Caribbean 4.
Some readers will be shocked when they read Brenin's story line. I really love this character. So brave and fearless. Absolutely devoted. His broken heart is captured in this picture. This portrait is of our charming Hugh Dancy, who played in Ella Enchanted and the T.V. series Hannibal.
And a little secret. Stop reading if you haven't read Master of Lies yet.
Brenin will not be a loved and lost character.
What!?
Oh, you're just going to have to read book 2.
Find Master of Lies on Amazon.
Die waiting for The Two Masters, to be released this summer.
Well, it seems I became so caught up in the momentum of revisions for the second book that I have slipped behind in my blog posts. Book Two, The Two Masters, is moving right along. But now for a fun blog day with attractive pictures.
Who did I base my characters on?
Well, my initial basis for my Emrys was the LOTR elves. Alas, my Emrys do not have pointy ears. I needed immortals with a flowing, graceful form, strong, lean bodies, and creamy, unblemished skin. Tolkien's elves were a perfect reference.I pictured the tall, thin frame of Legolas and his mysterious charisma. In the beginning, he was my Aneirin. The constantly furrowed look of Aneirin's brows are exactly how I pictured him in this picture.
Galadriel was my Meinwen. The way she moved with grace and her ethereal air was exactly how I pictured my High Emrys.
I stumbled across a “real life” Disney picture of Jane of the jungle. I knew I had found my Ahnalyn with her green eyes and her tiny nose and innocent look. Adorable. But with a hidden determination.
Okay, the next character is my villain. Caedryn. He is actually quite handsome, though evil. Can you guess who? Pale skin, dark hair. Witty. Follow the link here to be surprised.
My real gem. When I found my Catrin, I knew it was her. And readers will be pleased to learn more about Catrin in book 2. She moves center stage as a main protagonist in book 3.
Gemma Ward. She played the lovely role of Tamara in Pirates of the Caribbean 4.
Some readers will be shocked when they read Brenin's story line. I really love this character. So brave and fearless. Absolutely devoted. His broken heart is captured in this picture. This portrait is of our charming Hugh Dancy, who played in Ella Enchanted and the T.V. series Hannibal.And a little secret. Stop reading if you haven't read Master of Lies yet.
Brenin will not be a loved and lost character.
What!?
Oh, you're just going to have to read book 2.
Find Master of Lies on Amazon.
Die waiting for The Two Masters, to be released this summer.
January 16, 2015
Music is the Best Motivation . . . or is it Pointy-eared Elves?
Blog Day 4 for Master of Lies (Chronicles of the Half-Emrys, #1)
Are we having fun yet? Hang in there. Three more days to go. Catch Day Three hereif you missed it.
Where did I get my inspiration from?
I started writing this book back when I was doing a Lord of the Rings marathon. I even based some of my characters off of Tolkien’s. (See my next blog post for my character’s inspirations.) I imagined the rolling hills of Middle Earth for the Realm of Terrin and the murky swamps of the Dead Marshes for Rolant. The torturous snow peaks of the Misty Mountains could be my Eirwen Mountains, where the entrance to Gorlassar is hidden. And when you enter Gorlassar and fly to the capital Emryn city called Mared, I imagined the majestic music from when the Fellowship entered the great hall in the Mines of Moria.
But scenes and characters aside, I think that is where the similarities stop. My writing is nothing like Tolkien’s.
I would have to say music is what carried the feeling in my book. I mentioned the music from the mines of Moria scene. I did listen to the LOTR’s sound track quite a bit in the early phases of my free writing. But I took any music that uplifted or motivated me, from Evanescence’s Fallen CD to the Piano Guys. I think Twilight’s various sound tracks for all of their movies was a major inspiration for me. Evenstar (LOTR) was my inspiration for the final scene before the epilogue in my book. See my previous blog post, Magical Woodlands, for that story.
Follow this link to Master of Lies on Amazon.
Stay tuned for a Kindle Count Down sale the week before Valentine's Day!
January 10, 2015
Goodreads Giveaway!
18 hours left in my giveaway on Goodreads. Enter now for a chance to win!
Master of Lies (Chronicles of the Half-Emrys, #1)
January 7, 2015
No sparkly vampires or LOTR elves here.
Blog Day 3 for Master of Lies (Chronicles of the Half-Emrys, #1)We’re up to day three. Catch the posts you missed here: Day One and Day Two.
So where have we left off? If you haven’t read my book yet, you might be asking:
What’s in my book?
Immortals.
Not like sparkly vampires or LOTR elves. My immortals are called Emrys, which means immortal in Welsh. Fun fact, Merlin was also called Emrys. And no, there are no wizards in my book. Sorry, Harry Potter fans. (But there is magic. So I might say: If you like the magic that is in Harry Potter, you will love the powers in Master of Lies (Chronicles of the Half-Emrys, #1).
What else is there?Dragons and magical dragon stonesMagic and magical creaturesLight vs. darknessGood vs. Evil
“Fencing, fighting, torture, revenge, giants, monsters, chases, escapes, true love, miracles...”
Just kidding. (That line is from the Princess Bride for all you people ignorant of one of the best movies ever.)
But I can finish my list with: Revenge.
And a happy ending. Right. That’s what you wanted, right?
Follow this link to Master of Lies on Amazon.
January 1, 2015
A New Book for the New Year
Blog Day 2 for Master of Lies (Chronicles of the Half-Emrys, #1)
Happy New Year! Want a great new book to start off your new year? Check out this one.
Welcome to day two of getting to know Master of Lies. If you missed day one, find it here. Five more to follow on a weekly basis. I will keep them short and sweet. Enjoy!
What type of Readers will like this book and why?Master of Lies is written for a young adult audience. I find it suitable for ages 14 and up, only because there is a romantic element that I would not want younger readers to read. They don’t need to have romantic, gushy notions in their heads. It would only give them cuties. But the reading is engaging enough for all other ages.
It is a smooth read, with no excessive, “drawling” descriptions. (Here is where I say: If you like the LOTR, the Hobbit, and Eragon but would like a lighter read, you will like Master of Lies (Chronicles of the Half-Emrys, #1).)
My books share the same elements of magic and new worlds, as well as, elements of mystery, fun through rambunctious dragons, romantic tension, hope in the face of tragedy, desperation and longing to know who you are, revenge (can’t have a good story without revenge), and forgiveness.
Fantasy and romance readers will enjoy this novel.
Check out the back cover blurb and see what you think:
Mastering the lies is easy if you don’t have to wrestle against your own darkness . . .
Unaware of her immortal heritage, the truth concealed from her, Ahnalyn learns she’s a child of two worlds—a half-Emrys with the ability to wield the light and the dark power. Aneirin, a Son of Light, has his own reasons for leaving the immortal dragon realm. Defying the High Council, he risks exile—risks being tainted by the corrupt mortal world Ahnalyn is a part of.
As Aneirin’s life becomes entwined with Ahnalyn’s future, he is certain of one thing: Ahnalyn belongs with the immortal Emrys. But doubt and fear shroud Ahnalyn as the painful truths of her past unfold. Succumbing to the darkness lurking inside her is the easy, simple path. But under the dark power, Ahnalyn would be forbidden to enter the immortal realm and would be lost to all those she loves—forever.
Master of Lies is the first book in the Chronicles of the Half-Emrys, a high fantasy novel.
December 25, 2014
Christmas Debut Day for Master of Lies (Chronicles of the Half-Emrys, #1)
Christmas morning hello! Many of you already know about my new novel, Master of Lies (Chronicles of the Half-Emrys, #1). I am very excited to share more of my world with you.
I thought I might give you a little taste of what is too come, so I have written a series of blog posts to help you get to know my new book. This is day one. Six more to follow on a weekly basis. I will keep them short and sweet. Enjoy!
This book is the opening story of the Half-Emryn Chronicles. The books (I have three planned for this series.) follow the lives of the half-Emrys—a half race, and their struggle between the two worlds (mortal and immortal realms) they are a part of.
What is an Emrys?
I wanted to explore the concept of light-filled beings. Immortals that could harness their internal light and project it from their bodies in a myriad of ways. My Emrys were created to be the guardians of a nearly destroyed dragon species. The Master of Light, Deian, created them from his light. They are made of that light and the light is what gives them immortality. The source within their body is their heart-center. Not their physical heart, but their spiritual heart. Emrys can harness the energy from the light and spread it throughout their bodies and even project in from themselves. Their light also gives them other abilities, such as the ability to sense emotions. They’re not mind-readers. (With the exception of the High-Emrys. She has uncanny abilities, which I cannot get into here without ruining the books. But suffice to say that because she was the first Emrys, she has an extra “something” from Deian.)
My Emrys dwell in a world called Gorlassar, which is protected by the Power of Light. In this world, there is no death. The Emrys are immortal, and the dragons are as well. But alas, there is always a something to throw a wrench in the works. Gorlassar has a portal to the mortal world, where the evil is . . . and the tainted humans.
And so what is a Half-Emrys?
As the usual case, in an immortal world that is perfect and flawless, where the people gradually become indifferent and ignorant of the outside mortal world, someone always rebels. (For some reason the Thor movies come to mind. Can I throw in a promo? If you like Thor, you might like Chronicles of the Half-Emrys!)
I mean, why would you want to leave a golden realm protected by light? It’s safe and magical and BORING. Gasp! The first Emrys to leave the immortal Dragon Realm of Gorlassar did so in rebellion. And boy, did she cause a whole slew of trouble. What happens when an immortal passes through a portal and enters the mortal world? What happens when an Emrys and a human have a child?
The result is a new half race. An immortal who can still control light. . .
But with their mortal heritage comes a flaw.
The darkness.
And there is the basis for an internal struggle. Two powers within one being.Who doesn't love a good—light vs. dark, good vs. evil—novel?
Look for my novel on Amazon December 25 through January 1 on sale for 99 cents!
December 20, 2014
The Seven Must Haves
The Seven Must Haves:
Balance, Passion, Respect, Peace, Sanctuary, Tradition, Simplicity
Many of you have heard of the six B’s, which President Hinckley shared in his 2001 talk, A Prophet’s Counsel and Prayer for Youth. Be grateful. Be smart. Be clean. Be true. Be humble. Be prayerful. Well several years ago I came up with the Seven Must Have’s and felt inspired to share them with you.
Balance: Strive for balance of spiritual, intellectual, physical, social, and economical.And know that balance can never hold. We are always working to keep life as even as we can. Where one thing levels, then another raises or lowers on the scale. Effort is the key.“It is much easier for those who have a righteous balance to yield ‘to the enticings of the Holy Spirit’ (Mosiah 3:19).” “Balance in large measure is knowing the things that can be changed, putting them in proper perspective, and recognizing the things that will not change.” Living a Balanced Life by Elder Robert F. Orton Feb. 2008 Ensign
Passion: Have passion for something!It gives us drive. It gives us purpose. We have within us, the ability to create. So be passionate and have purpose. “Our Heavenly Father and His Beloved Son are creators and have entrusted each of us with a portion of Their creative power.” Elder David A. Bednar, We Believe in Being Chaste.
Respect: Respect for other people, the earth, and God. Children must respect their parents. Teach children to respect material possessions. We can take nothing we have for granted.
Peace: We can have peace! “Peace is to be in the midst of things and still be calm in your heart.” Unknown“But learn that he who doeth the works of righteousness shall receive his reward, even peace in this world, and in the world to come.” D&C 59:23
Sanctuary: Stand in Holy Places. Make our homes a sanctuary so we can feel the Holy Spirit. We stand at the door and controls what comes in and out. This includes social media that our children are exposed to.
Tradition: Build up a righteous posterity by example and tradition. Laman and Lemuel’s traditions influenced their posterity wickedly for 480 years. (Read the Book of Mormon to understand this one.) How are we influencing our posterity? We cannot underestimate the power of righteous tradition in our homes! Reference the 2008 Worldwide Leadership Training Meeting for more ideas.
Simplicity: Living a simple life makes things so much simpler! Cut back on everything unnecessary. “The so-called ease of modern living can actually become an impediment to gospel living.” Protecting Our Families in the Last Days by Elder Richard J. Maynes of the Seventy
Balance, Passion, Respect, Peace, Sanctuary, Tradition, Simplicity
Many of you have heard of the six B’s, which President Hinckley shared in his 2001 talk, A Prophet’s Counsel and Prayer for Youth. Be grateful. Be smart. Be clean. Be true. Be humble. Be prayerful. Well several years ago I came up with the Seven Must Have’s and felt inspired to share them with you.
Balance: Strive for balance of spiritual, intellectual, physical, social, and economical.And know that balance can never hold. We are always working to keep life as even as we can. Where one thing levels, then another raises or lowers on the scale. Effort is the key.“It is much easier for those who have a righteous balance to yield ‘to the enticings of the Holy Spirit’ (Mosiah 3:19).” “Balance in large measure is knowing the things that can be changed, putting them in proper perspective, and recognizing the things that will not change.” Living a Balanced Life by Elder Robert F. Orton Feb. 2008 Ensign
Passion: Have passion for something!It gives us drive. It gives us purpose. We have within us, the ability to create. So be passionate and have purpose. “Our Heavenly Father and His Beloved Son are creators and have entrusted each of us with a portion of Their creative power.” Elder David A. Bednar, We Believe in Being Chaste.
Respect: Respect for other people, the earth, and God. Children must respect their parents. Teach children to respect material possessions. We can take nothing we have for granted.
Peace: We can have peace! “Peace is to be in the midst of things and still be calm in your heart.” Unknown“But learn that he who doeth the works of righteousness shall receive his reward, even peace in this world, and in the world to come.” D&C 59:23
Sanctuary: Stand in Holy Places. Make our homes a sanctuary so we can feel the Holy Spirit. We stand at the door and controls what comes in and out. This includes social media that our children are exposed to.
Tradition: Build up a righteous posterity by example and tradition. Laman and Lemuel’s traditions influenced their posterity wickedly for 480 years. (Read the Book of Mormon to understand this one.) How are we influencing our posterity? We cannot underestimate the power of righteous tradition in our homes! Reference the 2008 Worldwide Leadership Training Meeting for more ideas.
Simplicity: Living a simple life makes things so much simpler! Cut back on everything unnecessary. “The so-called ease of modern living can actually become an impediment to gospel living.” Protecting Our Families in the Last Days by Elder Richard J. Maynes of the Seventy
December 17, 2014
Small Daily Improvements are the Key to Staggering Long-term Results
Time to talk about New Year’s resolutions. Blek. No really. I don’t honestly make them. I pretend I do. What I actually do is make small tiny incremental changes and hope they become a habit.My fascial stretch therapist told me that by doing fifteen minutes of something that we don’t want to do EVERYDAY, eventually the task will be completed. Of course he was relating this to stretching because I was having a hard time getting into a routine, but I latched onto this idea. It has been brewing in my brain for months.Then I heard the quote, small daily improvements are the key to staggering long-term results.Ding ding!Behold my new mantra.Over the past few years I have struggled with health issues. Who doesn’t? My muscles weakened to the point that digging a hole in my garden was earth-shatteringly impossible. Opening lids that my husband screwed on too tight was impossible. I was generally fatigued and my muscles were Jell-O.After a really intensive diet, in which I lost 20 pounds in two months, with no exercising, I knew I had to get my muscles back to go with my slimmer body. And so it started.One exercise at a time.I started with pushups on my knees. Regular squats. Resistance exercises I could only do with my body. In the beginning I only managed 3 kneeling pushups. 6 weeks later I can now do 2 full ones and 13 more on my knees.I added one new exercise every day. I added one rep to every old exercise every day. I still can’t exercise for more than 10-15 minutes at a time. But when I started I was doing 5 minutes here and 5 minutes there. I now do 15 minutes twice a day. I am getting stronger!Today I added cardio. 2-3 minutes of intense cardio. It was hard.Mantras rock. I’m hanging this one where I can see it every day.
Now if only I can translate this into my scripture study, I’m good to go.
Now if only I can translate this into my scripture study, I’m good to go.
Writing and Beyond
Blog adventures about my writing, my gardening, and my faith.
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