Angela Sage Larsen's Blog, page 11

Live Every Day

Just listened to a speech by Steve Jobs where he opined on the popular saying "live every day like it's your last." He lives by this creed, and I know many others who also have this as their motto. I just don't think I can.

I think I am the "live every day like it's your first" kinda gal. Treating every day like a fresh opportunity, full of hope, a world of potential before me is my ideal. I know the idea of living every day like your last SHOULD seem like it would work for me, what with my fundamental needs for deadlines. But I still think of deadlines (despite the name) as beginnings, not deaths or endings. Living today like it was my last would mean I would be wrapping everything up so there are no loose ends to my personal little existence. Whereas living today like it is my first would mean making loose ends, exploring, creating, searching, hoping, progressing, moving forward, upward, outward.

Maybe what I really need is just to live today like it's the day that's meant for me to be living; maybe I just need to live today–not like it's my first or my last–but my perfect now day.

Writing for Children

Love this article in the Huff Po "Why I Write for Children." Particularly this quote by EB White at the end of the article: "[A]nyone who writes down to children is simply wasting his time. You have to write up, not down. Children are demanding. They are the most attentive, curious, eager, observant, sensitive, quick, and generally congenial readers on earth."

Sex

Yeah. This can't be good.

Sex. I'm tired of it. Oh, settle down. It's not what you think! I'm talking about the sexualization of young girls (and actually boys, too. And if you must know, of people at any stage in life). Seemingly innocent comments like "she's such a little flirt!" or "what a heart breaker!" about toddlers really get me torqued; so does encouraging pre-schoolers to have "girlfriends" or "boyfriends." UGH. One of the main reasons I was inspired to create Petalwink and Fifties Chix is to slow down and hopefully even reverse this tidal wave of sexuality that is threatening to swallow our society whole and spit it out as worthless and depraved. I do not feel that I am overstating it when I say that what is wrong with society is that it is currently revolving around rampant materialism with sex at the heart of it.

Is it a coincidence that young starlets must "accept" and promote their sexiness and with clock-like precision thereafter find themselves in extreme crisis? I have been quiet on this topic too long, or have only hinted subtly at it because I don't want people to think I'm a prude. But that's ridiculous; anyone who knows me knows that I'm pretty fun, spontaneous and rather–shall we say? –bold with my humor. But I know that in order for all of us to be free to be childlike, spontaneous, creative, bold we must revolt against being slaves to sexuality.

I've used the term "girl power" sparingly in the past because I don't like what it sometime means. When I talk about girl power, I do NOT mean the utilization of sexual feminine wiles to get "our" way. In fact, true girl power is sadly what the feminist movement left out: it isn't using sex to advance a cause, it's empowering girls (women, too, but for the purpose of this post, I'm talking about children) to break free from being  a pretty little thing who can seduce and manipulate (and therefore be gratified) = using sex; it's empowering girls to discover their spiritual and mental talents and allowing them put those talents to good use in generosity to uplift, heal and improve the world.

This is an awesome article from the Good Men Project magazine (yes, I specifically chose an article from a men's magazine; many women's magazines and blogs have been covering this, too, I'm grateful to say; see below). The article is called "Men, Princess Culture, and the Sexualization of Young Girls" and it references  Peggy Orentstein's book Cinderella Ate My Daughter: Dispatches From the Front Lines of the New Girlie-Girl Culture. The article points out (in Ms. Orenstein's words), "Sexualization is not just imposing sexuality on children before they're ready and viewing girls as sexual objects, but also valuing a girl for her appearance over her other attributes."

The article references another article–must read!– in Redbook (Little Girls Gone Wild: Why Daughters Are Acting Too Sexy, Too Soon) which points out this A.L.A.R.M.I.N.G. statistic: "According to a survey by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy and cosmogirl.com, 22 percent of girls ages 13 to 19 have sent or posted nude or semi-nude pictures of themselves online." Let's do the math: that's ONE IN FIVE GIRLS.

At even a seemingly benign level, it's tempting to fall into the easy trap of "building" girls' self esteem by reassuring them of how pretty they are; but clearly this does not empower them to develop their creativity, enrich their spiritual growth, encourage their intellectual curiosity, inspire them to be loving, kind, generous and strong. Taking girls to the salon or on a shopping spree tells them that this is what women do. I didn't get a manicure until my senior prom, but go into a salon now, and you will practically get squeezed out by tweens and toddlers getting mani-pedis. I always wonder, "how will their nails stay nice when they play outside in the mud?" until I realize with sheer panic that they won't be playing in the mud at all.

My greatest hope in writing for girls (and I don't know, someday I may write specifically for boys, too, but at the moment I'm not done following this particular path. But I am clear that they need this message just as much, if not more): to remind them that beauty isn't a physical attribute, it's a spiritual quality; to celebrate their innocence, which is more powerful and effective than the 17 billion advertising dollars  directed right at them annually; to cherish their ability to shine light in the most spectacular ways right where we need it. These precious girls are my inspiration and I hope I can give back a fraction of the inspiration they've given me by standing as a witness to and encouraging what they really are: "gentle beams of living Love." *

*quote from Mary Baker Eddy, taken from her poem entitled Christmas Morn.

THIS is much better.

How to be Miserable 101

Maybe you don't need any more tips in this direction, but I found this quite helpful. For the word artist, you may substitute "writer," "mother," "father," "entrepreneur," etc. My dog, Daisy, tried it with "dog" and she said it totally worked. "Enjoy" (??)

from http://drawn.ca/archive/keri-smith-on...

Read/Write More…Complain Less

Is anyone else tired of the ebook v. printed book argument? Can we all please agree that ebooks will never replace printed books? Let's just accept that what digital publishing is doing is encouraging more reading! This is a time to celebrate! I looooooove our iPad and I loooooooove my stacks and piles of books (I did go to a used book store the other day and "sell" some books that I wasn't going to miss, but there are some that I will never be able to part with).

My only "complaint" is that the publishing industry is changing so much, so fast, it's a full time job just keeping up with it. And it's tempting to think that the amount of publicity and marketing authors have to do now may be taking them away from their "real" jobs of writing. But I keep telling myself, it all comes down to having more opportunities to connect with readers…

Right?

Stuff like this is WEIRD

"Weird" is probably one of those words "good writers" don't use (you know, like expletives?) because they can come up with much better adjectives. But seriously, this is just weird…

Sat down to write Fifties Chix today and one of the characters asks another character when she was born (it was kind of a trick question, because the Fifties Chix have time traveled from 1955, and she was born in 1940, but can't say that because the current year is 2010 and that would make her 70 years old, which she's not). Mary (being written by me, of course) goes to answer with her birthdate (minus the year). Not remembering this detail, I had to go to my special file – where I outlined all the characters and their details this past summer – to look up her birthday, and guess what it was?

JANUARY 13.

That's today, folks!!

WEIRD, right?

I know!

Anything can happen

I started chapter 2 of the latest Fifties Chix book (Back to Basics) kicking and screaming (note my previous post). I wrote it, as I promised, and then grudgingly went on to chapter 3. I also cleaned out a closet, cleaned the kitchen, and cleaned my studio if that gives you any indication of how excited I was to sit down and write.

I kept having this conversation with myself:

Me: "I don't want to write it. The first book is so good. There's nowhere to go but down and you'll [I'll] ruin the series."

Me: "No, this one is going to be even better! Remember, write what you want to read!"

Me: "But the whole series is outlined. It will be boring to write."

Me: "Are you kidding me [Am I kidding me]? Anything can happen. An outline is just a 2-D map, totally different than taking the actual road trip. Anything can happen on the journey!"

I finally won out and made a point, no matter how much I resisted, to sit down and write Fifties Chix for at least four hours a day, no matter what. It was exhilarating! I met new characters that I didn't even know would surface, I found out amazing things about characters I already thought I knew everything about! Some plot twists came to light that don't lead away from the outline, instead it is just like taking the scenic route (and we know it's all about the journey, not the destination). When I let myself accept that anything can happen (because I know it's all only good), the resistance faded. I have spent the last two days positively g.i.d.d.y. . . . and now it's today's block of time to write and I'm so excited to see what will happen. Because anything can . . . and it will be wonderful.

Chapter five, here I come!

Letter to my 2011 self

(fab image from 123rf.com)

A letter from me at the end of 2011 to me now

Dear me,

Hello Gorgeous! What a year you have ahead. Actually, it doesn't exist yet, but what is here now is GOOD and all that 2011 holds will be blooming out of that.

You will have challenges, of course, but don't worry, you learn and grow so much from them (Remember that Jay Z interview at the end of 2010 when he said you don't really learn anything from success?). Oh, it will be a year of tremendous success, too, for whatever that's worth. You will learn something from success; to keep moving forward and not become complacent. If your year ahead could be summed up in one word, I think it would be FOCUS.

Fearless Operation of Conscious Understanding of Spirit (oh, in 2011 you get into acrostics, apparently). You really strive for everything you do, think, or say to come out of a spiritual understanding of God, good, Love. Good on you for that. Also, I'm happy to say that you do a stupendous job of being more grateful and looking for good everywhere; even when it's not immediately evident, instead of reacting, you've gotten quite adept at pausing and looking below the surface. Some things I'll admit, you had to learn over and over again, but some things are like meals…you just have to do it more than once and it ends up being a habit for the sake of sustenance. There are at least two ginormous changes, but I'll let you be surprised. Suffice it to say, you kept your head up, a smile on and you kept trusting. You get to play a big role in healing, which is really fun. You got into running again, as much as you can "get into" running. Your nails are long and healthy and natural. Way to go! Your writing has really improved; not only your writing habits, but the quality of it. The positive reviews don't hurt, so look forward to those. I mean, for crying out loud, you wrote a lot of books this year! It's clear that you remembered that great mantra of Stieg Larsson's, "write what you want to read."

All in all, I think you'll really like 2011. Just don't panic. Focus. And be grateful for and cherish the innumerable sweet moments of insight when you're alone, with friends or family. And for all the moments of laughter and silliness. There will be plenty of those, too.

Love,

Me

Just Say "No" to Nonexistence

So many blank pages lie before me…well, technically, not really, since I write on my laptop. But so many potentially blank pages, leading up to a Deadline. I'm on chapter 2 of a 20+ chapter book (the second Fifties Chix book, called "Back to Basics.").

I loooooooooove the first chapter. It's exciting, it's right on and it already has a little twist that makes me smile. But dang, I CANNOT get to chapter 2. Here's why: my studio needs cleaning, I need a snack, my hair needs futzing with, I'm thirsty, I should play with/walk the dog, I need to mail out thank you cards, my closet is a mess, it's Monday, where's that lip gloss I got in my Christmas stocking?-I should find it, what's Whit doing?-we should hang out, and these socks don't feel warm enough…really, you could insert just about anything other than "write chapter 2″ here and it needs doing. I know what this is called, of course. It's called "procrastination." Such a great word! So official! Sounds powerful, doesn't it? I love this demotivator: "Hard work often pays off after time, but laziness always pays off now."

I rebel and think, hey! It's not laziness! Laziness is so unappealing. Wanna know what it is is? It's the fantasy. Right now chapter 2 doesn't exist. It is a perfect piece of literature. It has no typos, it makes perfect sense, it's brilliantly inspired and genius-ly conceived. In fact, it's the best thing I've never written! (The rest of the unwritten book ain't bad either, if you're wondering).

As soon as I write chapter 2 (and don't think it's lost on me that I am blogging instead of writing chapter 2. I bet you're reading this to procrastinate something yourself, aren't you?? Don't judge me), it will be a draft that needs a lot more work, and I'll have to write chapter 3! Yikes! The injustice!

But a friend shared a life-changing truth with me when I was interning at an art gallery and supposed to be painting watercolors to hang on the walls to sell. I told her all about the paintings I was planning on painting and she said without a pause, "You can't sell it if it doesn't exist." Ouch, did she have to be so harsh?

She was right of course. Not only can you not "sell" something that doesn't exist, it doesn't satisfy, pay the bills, keep you warm, feed you or serve any purpose other than make you feel temporarily smug in the day dreaming of it.

Soooo with that, I'm just saying no to the nonexistence [the mere fantasy] of chapter 2 and I'm off to write it!!

(Right after I change my socks…)