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Six Pillars of Self-Esteem

4.11  ·  Rating details ·  7,883 ratings  ·  523 reviews
Nathaniel Branden's book is the culmination of a lifetime of clinical practice and study, already hailed in its hardcover edition as a classic and the most significant work on the topic.  Immense in scope and vision and filled with insight into human motivation and behavior, The Six Pillars Of Self-Esteem is essential reading for anyone with a personal or professional inte ...more
Paperback, 341 pages
Published May 1st 1995 by Bantam (first published January 1st 1994)
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Stan You could start with the 33 week sentence completion program, after that you probably have a more clear vision of which pillars you still need to work…moreYou could start with the 33 week sentence completion program, after that you probably have a more clear vision of which pillars you still need to work on and you could do the excercises at the end of the chapters to work on your weak points. Thats how I would approach it, good luck!(less)

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BuenoBomb aka Andre Bueno
Great book and such a quick read.

- The higher our self esteem: the less we need to prove ourselves, we strive for higher goals, we are more ambitious.
- The more inclined we are to treat others with respect.
- The joy of life comes from being better than you were yesterday, delighting in the true joys of life, and not in comparison to others
- The joy is being who you are and not in trying to be better than someone else

1. The practice of living consciously
- Being present
- L
Jul 16, 2012 rated it it was amazing
A life-saving and life-changing book! If you're a self-studier, read this book. It's as if you were sitting and talking to him. He gives very comprehensive lists, questions and exercises to practice! Live for yourself ! You will see the difference in yourself when you finish this book, it is the first step to changing your ideas about yourself, and how you treat others in kind and how they treat you! ...more
Mario Tomic
Nov 19, 2013 rated it it was amazing
Amazing book, I listened thought the full audio version in one go. Material is very easy to understand and the part I liked the most was about taking responsibility for your life. Favorite quote: "No one is coming to rescue me. If I don't DO something, nothing is going to change." ...more
Quite an eye-opener ... It is like someone slaps you in the face, making you wake up from a long coma reminding you that NO ONE IS COMING... you and solely YOU are the one who is the origin of any change, revolution, revision, reform, a better high-quality version of anything you might wish for. And this is feasible through the utilization of the six pillars...through perseverance...through sticking to these six pillars. I wish this book was taught at school instead of a bunch of nonsense religi ...more
Feb 09, 2012 rated it liked it
Shelves: self-help
When I found out I was getting laid off from my job I was also going through some extremely challenging personal crap - as a result, I started having really low self-esteem and spent several months struggling with depression. This book is extremely helpful. It gives you practical tools to change the way you think so that you are not constantly blaming yourself for your problems/situation, but are able to strategically give yourself positive messages that are necessary for surviving the hard time ...more
Gordana Vuckovic-Glusac
Dec 12, 2016 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: audio-book
Give your child roots to grow and wings to fly.
Very good--

"The unexamined life is not worth living," said the wisest of men who called himself a fool and ignorant.

"A book on self-esteem?" you might jeer in a mix of derision, disbelief, and, perhaps, curiosity. "What, do you have, like, low self-esteem? Why do you need to read this stuff?"

Everyone at some point undergoes tribulations, doubts, frustrations, and insecurities.

"Know thyself," said the same wise man.

I'm in the process of facing my inner demons.

Listening to the audio version of thi
Tony Rogers  Jr.
Mar 02, 2015 rated it really liked it
Shelves: read-in-2015
Definitely the best book on self-esteem I've ever read, the author really knows his stuff. He asserts that self-esteem is a by-product of practicing the 6 pillars of self-esteem which are: The practice of living consciously, The practice of self-acceptance, The practice of self-responsibility, The practice of self-assertiveness, The practice of living purposefully and The practice of personal integrity. One of my favorite quotes from the book is this simple yet powerful gem "Self-esteem is an in ...more
Steven Walle
Jul 21, 2018 rated it it was amazing
This book is already being hailed as a classic on the topic. This book is a result of a life time of study. I recommend it to all who want to achieve much more in their lives.
Enjoy and Be Blessed
Jacob Colangelo
Jun 30, 2017 rated it liked it
This book had been recommended to me over and over as one of the best self-help books on the market.

That being said, it did provide wonderful, concrete advice and insight into self-esteem and ways to improve it. It also includes the author's original form of (kind of) self-therapy, sentence completion exercises. He provides a comprehensive 31-week exercise program at the end of the book, which is extremely helpful for people looking for practical help in developing their self-esteem. Aside from
Aug 26, 2009 rated it it was amazing
My son recommended then bought this book for me not two years ago. I was so impressed with its information and presentation, I took a part of it within me and moved forward from a pretty low plane. This book can save lives when the world crashes down. It can help the people who are already happy to reach even further potentials.

This is a book of empowerment through the only person who can really influence who you are or where you are going; yourself. I felt so much better about myself after rea
Margaret Winson
Aug 08, 2014 rated it it was amazing
I cannot speak highly enough of this book. I read it 8 years ago when my husband and I were on a trial separation, and it stood me back on my feet again. The main lesson (there are so many) seems to be: this is your life, live it deliberately. Every day, every action, every thought counts. He points out that most of us have 'okay' self-esteem, and many of us are even high achievers but will not necessarily enjoy our lives due to the averageness of our self-esteem. His plan for how to raise the b ...more
Samuel Wayne Allen
Mar 14, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: 2020
Being a long-time fan of the YouTube channel, Charisma on Command, and Six Pillars of Self-Esteem being one of Charlie Houpert's most talked about books on the channel, I inevitably, at some point had to give it a read! Dang, am I glad I did! What a life changer!

Some of my favorite quotes:

"Without appropriate self-assertivness, we are spectators, not participants. Healthy self-esteem asks that we leap into the arena; that we be willing to get our hands dirty."

"No amount of admiration for another
John Doe
Apr 03, 2014 rated it it was amazing
This is a truly life-changing book.

Branden uses a type of logic that is intricate but anything but obfuscated: you are left with a sense of clarity.

I should stress that this book is far from universally compatible with all beliefs. There is a distinct philosophically biased aspect to the concepts presented. But whatever your take on live, you'll have a hard time finding fault in the logic presented.

Personally this book has made me think about how I want to live my life, and made me recognize an
Jan 17, 2013 rated it really liked it
Excellent book discussing the importance of:

1. LIVING CONSCIOUSLY. This requires us to be fully in the present moment.
2. ACCEPT YOURSELF. Yes, you have flaws and attributes. You also have the opportunity to enhance who you are, by accepting everything about yourself. In fact, it is the only sustainable way.
3. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR EXPERIENCES. Only 10% of life is what happens. The remaining 90% is how how you respond to those happenings.
4. ASSERT WHO YOU ARE. Honor what you think, feel, b
Melania Marianu
Feb 25, 2020 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This book is a gem.

Alltough the romanian translation is poor, the content of the book is rich, both in the theoretical aspects of self-esteem, and the practical ones.
Apr 04, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: self-help
Sometimes self-esteem is confused with boasting or arrogance, but such traits reflect a lack of self-esteem. Persons of high self-esteem are not driven to make themselves superior to others. Their joy is in being who they are, not in being better than someone else. When we have unconflicted self-esteem, joy is our motor, not fear. It is happiness that we wish to experience. Our purpose is self-expression, not self-justification. Our motive is not to "prove" our worth but to live our possibilitie ...more
Jun 04, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: psychology
Great book on the topic of self-esteem. Branden did a good job in defining self-esteem as reality-based and self-practiced, as opposed to something that we should automatically have if we were treated the right way by others. He also broke down the concept into 6 components that we can work on: 1) living consciously, 2) self-acceptance, 3) self-responsibility, 4) self-assertiveness, 5) living purposefully, and 6) personal integrity. I particularly liked how he included his own mistakes as exampl ...more
Jan 06, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: self-dev, psychology
it's really really helpful book. specially if you're self studying student ...more
Nicolay Hvidsten
Oct 21, 2015 rated it really liked it
Short and to the point. Branden argues that true change comes from within, by embracing deep inner values like honesty and integrity, and is not some "quick fix" you can apply from the outside-in. This view very much coincides with the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, which is a more in-depth study on basically the same principles that Branden talks about.

Additionally the views expressed by Branden align very nicely with the teachings of eastern spirituality (buddhism, taoism, and Tolle) in
Shashwat Singh
Jan 12, 2014 rated it it was amazing
A great book. Goes into what actually is self-esteem, and how to build self-esteem as well as maintain it.

I like this book because it acknowledges the reality that self esteem is something that takes work to build and keep strong. Goes against the popular belief that everyone deserves self esteem, no matter how they live or choices they make. You can't just have self-esteem with no effort on your part.

Additionally he discusses the importance of self-esteem at work, which is something which conn
Nati S
I enjoyed reading this book. It was a perfect amalgamation of spirituality, psychology and self-development.

On the first glance the concepts, the six pillars of self-esteem, appear simplistic. The magic lies in actually practicing these pillars for a prolonged period of time.

As for myself, I learnt a few things that caused paradigm shifts. I realized that if I am to become a person with self-esteem, I ought to accept myself fully . This means also accepting parts of myself that I don't like.

Ben Claymier
Sep 24, 2019 rated it it was amazing
I didn't know if I was going to get a ton from this book, mainly because of the deeply skeptical view I hold of other self-help titles geared towards that topic. Sure I'll deep dive on a guide-book for organization, goal planning, and examinations of discipline, but I have always looked down my nose at the "believe you fart sparkles" mentality of these other self-help subgenres.

And then this books comes along and shows me how great these titles can be when they're done right. How dare you shake
Ibrahim Niftiyev
Nov 18, 2018 rated it it was amazing
It was really the best book about self-discovery which targets self-esteem. I strongly recommend it to the friends who are interested in this topic and really strives to read in a simple and understandable language. Many books are unapproachable because of their complex language. However, Nathaniel Branden did a great job by opening-up such an important theme to the broad audience.
Paun Ioana
Jan 31, 2021 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This book is a wonderfull and extensive explanation of what takes for a good self-esteem.
Self-esteem is not saying silly sentences in front of the mirror...
"Genuine self-esteem is what we feel about ourselves when everything is not all right." It's the trust in ourselves that we can solve or manage everything that life throws at us.
Nov 17, 2013 rated it it was amazing
I could've skipped every other book I've ever read about self improvement and self realization. This is where I should've started, but I saved it for last because I thought I had good self esteem. What I did not know was that my depression earlier this year was due to an incongruity between my actions and my beliefs- and their negative impact on my self esteem and sense of self worth. This book is by far the best I've read so far about understanding yourself. For me in particular, I learned tha ...more
Feb 15, 2014 rated it it was amazing
This is an excellent book!
Initially, a substantial effort was required to even get through the beginning of this very helpful book. I needed to resort to the dictionary on a number of occasions throughout the read.

The effort was entirely worth it!
Branden successfully mentored me into becoming somewhat of my own "therapist"!
I suspect that may have been his intention.

This is a very helpful tome!
Akanksha Sharma
Jan 07, 2016 rated it it was amazing
So different from the cookie cutter self help book. I hadn't read a self help book in ages. So glad I found this one. Contains written exercises that you can easily practice at home to raise your level of consciousness in life. ...more
Rob Thompson
About the book: The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem shows us that building confidence in ourselves is a just matter of taking a few simple steps. Healthy self-esteem is something we can achieve not just as individuals, but in our relationships and communities too.

About the author: Nathaniel Branden is an American psychotherapist and writer. He has written numerous books on the topic of self-esteem, such as The Psychology of Self-Esteem, How to Raise Your Self-Esteem and The Power of Self-Esteem.

My hi
Jan Anne
Sep 15, 2019 rated it liked it
A book on self-esteem by a psychologist who spend years studying it. It makes for useful self-help rather than a lot of the "blabla" out there today. Not life changing, but useful tools and insights gained.

Tl;dr: Self-esteem is a choice, takes effort and can be practiced.
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Nathaniel Branden started reading Ayn Rand's "Fountainhead" in the summer of '44 as he was introduced to it by his sister and her giggling friends.

He met Rand in California where he attended college for psychology. She responded to his fan letter.

"Atlas Shrugged" was dedicated to Branden and he became her intellectual heir. The two carried on an affair, though each was married. After a dispute, t

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