In Mijn Hoofd

Out of My Mind #1

by Sharon M. Draper, Merel Leene (Translator)

Melody heeft een fotografisch geheugen: haar hoofd is net een camera die altijd aanstaat. Altijd. En er is geen delete-knop. Ze is de slimste van haar hele school maar niemand weet het, want ze kan het aan niemand vertellen. Want Melody kan niet praten. Ze kan niet schrijven. Ze kan niet lopen.

Melody wordt er gek van dat ze door de Cerebrale Parese vastzit in haar eigen hoofd, en aan niemand kan vertellen wat ze denkt en voelt. Tot ze iets ontdekt wat haar voor het eerst in haar leven de kans geeft om te praten. Eindelijk heeft Melody een stem. Maar niet iedereen in haar omgeving is klaar om die te horen.

Genres: Realistic Fiction, Middle Grade, Young Adult, Fiction, Contemporary, Disability, Childrens

244 pages, Paperback

First published March 9, 2010

About the author

Sharon M. Draper is a professional educator as well as an accomplished writer. She has been honored as the National Teacher of the Year, is a five-time winner of the Coretta Scott King Literary Award, and is a New York Times bestselling author. She lives in Cincinnati, Ohio.

Reviews

[Dest · Rating 2 out of 5]

Many people love love love this book, so I'm going to skip the praise for now (you can read plenty of it elsewhere) and go straight to criticism:

1. The phrase "untouched in my hands" really bothers me. If a snowflake is melting in your hands, you've touched it. This line was probably meant to sound poetic but comes off as a failed metaphor to me.

2. I worry this book is dated already. Do kids in the year 2010 say "tight" anymore? I think Draper is trying to make Melody sound like an average kid, but to me she sounds like an adult trying to sound like a kid. In fact, a lot of dialogue struck me as unrealistic (i.e. an adult's version of what she thinks modern kids sound like). I've never heard anyone say, "She is tripping," without droppin' the g. Now, I still say things are "the bomb," but I'm a lot older than the kids in this book. Other things that I think will date this book: MySpace, TiVo, and Nintendo Wii. (I've re-read sections of the book and I think it's Draper's overuse of exclamation points that makes her characters sound inauthentic and corny to me.)

3. It strikes me as unrealistic that Melody, with her super intelligence, couldn't communicate better using her low-tech talking board. If she's a perfect speller, couldn't she spell out "I love you" to her parents? Wouldn't they take the time to allow her to do that? Better yet, wouldn't her parents seek out adaptive technology so they could communicate better with their child?

4. The villains in this story (Molly and Claire, the bad teachers, and the stupid psychologist that gives Melody her initial intelligence test) are totally one-dimensional. I get annoyed when authors create completely flat villains.

5. I thought the near-tragedy thrown in at the end of the book didn't really contribute to the story. It was a weird way to end the book, like the author wanted to crank up the melodrama in the end and she overdid it.

6. This is a personal issue: I went to elementary school with a boy who had CP and he spent only part of each day away from the rest of our class. If this was the case in the 1980s, it's hard for me to believe that educators in the 21st Century have regressed into the situation Melody finds herself in. I loved the first chapter of this book, but I grew more and more skeptical as it went on. (Update: Many people have told me in the comments that it *is* common for children with disabilities to be completely segregated from the rest of the school. Instead of removing this criticism, I will leave it because it shows that what strikes one reader as unrealistic can be all too realistic for another reader. Thanks, commenters.)

To conclude my review I want to say: I'm not heartless! I think this story has the potential to really spark empathy. But this book had a lot of shortcomings and I'm not one to ignore them just because the subject matter is important. I believe this could have been a much better book. (When I first reviewed this book it had Newbery buzz and in my opinion it's not Newbery caliber.)

Update: I just read something by the author Patrick Ness on School Library Journal's Battle of the Books 2014. He said there are too many books he calls CBAITS, which stands for Crappy Books About Important Things. I was like, yes! I wouldn't go so far as to call Out of My Mind a crappy book, but I do think its important subject matter made some reviewers forgive or ignore its literary flaws.

Another update: I see that Disney is making this into a movie, so I'll probably have a fresh crop of commenters mad at me for this negative review. To those who love this book: I'm glad you love this book! It's ok for you to love it and for me to dislike it. We can still be friends.

[Melissa ♥ Dog/Wolf Lover ♥ Martin · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have a lot of say about this book. I had so many feels. I have cried and I have raged. BOOKS MAKE ME FEEL!

****FREAKING SPOILERS****



In this book we meet Melody. I'm going to write a good amount of excerpts about Melody.

*Melody had a pink wheelchair until she upgraded.
*Melody had a goldfish named Ollie until he jumped out of the bowl and died. (she got blamed)
*Melody got a dog she names Butterscotch by pointing at candy until her parents get it right.
*Melody has cerebral-palsy.
*Melody can't speak, walk, eat on her own or take herself to the bathroom.
*Melody had a doctor tell her mom that she has brain damage. (bastard)
*Melody has a photographic memory.
*Melody tells the story in her mind through-out the book.
*Melody is fictional but there are many Melody's.
*Melody has a wonderful neighbor named Violet who taught her to do things she couldn't.
*Melody has a very loving mom and dad.
*Melody has a new baby sister.
*Melody has a wonderful aide, Catherine that helps her in school.
*Melody goes to school with a couple of @ssholes.

Here is a little more about Melody.

I have no idea how I untangled the complicated process of words and thought, but it happened quickly and naturally. By the time I as two, all my memories had words, and all my words had meanings.
But only in my head.
I have never spoken one single word. I am almost eleven years old.

•••••••

When I sleep, I dream. And in my dreams I can do anything. I get picked first on the playground for games. I can run so fast! I take gymnastics, and I never fall off the balance beam. I know how to square-dance, and I'm good at it. I call my friends on the phone, and we talk for hours. I whisper secrets. I sing.
When I wake up in the morning, it's always sort of a letdown as reality hits me. I have to be fed and dressed so I can spend another long day in the happy-face room at Spaulding Street School.

Melody is smart as a whip. Like I said before, she has a photographic memory. But no one knows this. She memorizes the shows she watches on Discovery Channel. Well, she memorizes everything. I would love to have a photographic memory.

Melody's next door neighbor, Violet, would watch her when she was little while her parents worked. She taught Melody that she could roll over while she was on the floor. Melody knew everything Violet was saying to her. She learned from Violet. When Melody got a little older, Violet taught her how to fall out of her wheelchair correctly if someone forgot to strap her in, so she wouldn't bash her head. Violet made a board with as many words written down so Melody could point to certain words and people could sort of communicate with her. It wasn't much but it was something.

I felt bad for Melody at school because she was in that one class with all of the handicapped kids and they weren't really taught much of anything. Melody was too bright for all of that but couldn't tell anyone. One day though, the school decided the kids should start being put in the normal classes for one day a week or so. Melody is so happy! This is where she thinks she meets a good friend in a girl named Rose and she does for the most part. Rose just messed up a couple of times. But she also meets the evil bitches, Claire and Molly. I will get to those @ssholes in a few minutes.

One day Melody sees someone with a new lap top and she starting thinking about Stephen Hawking. She manages to give enough hints to Catherine about getting something just for Melody. They start searching online and they find the Medi-Talker! Catherine gets all of the information for Melody to take home to her parents.

Melody is so excited when she gets to Violets and they research the Medi-Talker more so that when Melody's mom comes over to get her she sits down at the computer and they all discuss trying to get one. It turns out the insurance will pay for half of it. So they have to go through all of this stuff and paperwork and signatures and more paperwork and then FINALLY it gets there!

Violet and Melody work on it until her parents get home. They were okay with it because of all the excitement. It was such a special moment. I cried, yeah. Melody got to actually speak to her parents for the first time.



"Hi, Dad. Hi, Mom. I am so happy."
Mom gets all teary-eyed, and her nose gets red. She is looking at me all soft and gooey.
When I think about it, I realize I have never, ever said any words directly to my parents. So I push a couple of buttons, and the machine speaks the words I've never been able to say.
"I love you."
Mom completely loses it. She bubbles up with tears and grabs dad. I think he might be sniffling back a couple of tears himself.
But he has recorded it all.

At one point in one of the classes, Melody wants to try out for the Quiz Team. She was the highest one to score when they did a sample test. Mr. D. was reluctant at first but apologized later. I thought I was going to have to smack him too. Anyway, Melody's little Medi-Talker also prints out anything she types if she wants it to so she can participate in class and all kinds of things.

Let me tell you, these bitches named Claire and Molly mouth off about Melody from the get go and I wanted to beat the shit out of them. I DO NOT TOLERATE PEOPLE THAT SAY BAD THINGS TO HANDICAPPED PEOPLE, ANY KIND OF ABUSER (PEOPLE & ANIMAL) ANIMAL KILLERS, PEOPLE KILLERS, PEDOPHILES. IT'S SAD THAT I CAN PROBABLY GO ON AND ON. But, I digress. Here is just a little excerpt from them that made me want to snatch them up out of their chairs. I found the perfect gif for that too.

When we arrive at Mr. Dimming's room, a group of kids from my history class are already there, whispering together and going over note cards. They look up in surprise when Catherine wheels me in.
"Hi, Melody," Rose says. "What are you doing here?" Her voice doesn't sound as friendly as usual.
"Quiz team," I type.
"She can't be on the team," I hear Claire whisper to Jessica, wrinkling up her nose. "She's from the retard room!"
Molly thinks that really funny. She screeches like a blue jay when she laughs.

THIS IS WHAT I THINK OF THAT!



Anyhoo, Melody gets into the group and they are all going to DC after they win the first round. Well, lets just say some stuff happens and they didn't win. And some other horrible things happen but we won't talk about that, you can read all of that.

I was so proud of Melody though. She held her head up as high as she could and told the whole class off in her own way.

I totally loved this story. I love Melody. I love all of the wonderful people in the book. I loved how the author told the story. I just LOVED IT, K!

And to think, I might never have read this book if I didn't get the paperback from Amazon for $5 and some change for a goodreads challenge. I thought it sounded good but I had no idea how good!

Mel 🖤🐶🐺🐾

MY BLOG: Melissa Martin's Reading List

[Claire · Rating 3 out of 5]

Oh, man. I'm finding this book very difficult to write about. I really want to like this book. Before I was a librarian, I was a disability rights advocate; and of the many experiences that I had during those six years, one of the most intense and formative was supporting a young woman my age who had CP and was nonverbal. She was a client and then a friend, and much of our time together was spent supporting her to learn how to use a speech device to communicate in her own words. She passed away a few years ago, and I miss her. Our friendship, and the experience of supporting her to learn to speak using her own words, necessarily colors my reading of this book and others like it - so that's why I feel the need to include it in a book review. My family experience with disability in general and CP in particular changes my perspective too. It makes me an unobjective reader, and prone to judge the book on my own experiences - so of course, take my review with a grain or ten of salt. Please excuse any rambling!

So as a reader, and in my librarian life, I frequently look for books for teens and kids that star characters with disabilities. There are truly wonderful ones (Rules) and terrible ones (So B. It). I particularly keep my eyes open for books that star characters with depth, complexity, and personhood, rather than ones that use people with disabilities as a foil or plot device acting on characters without disabilities. And I frequently get irritated at authors who write ridiculous, inauthentic portrayals of PWD (*cough* So B. It *cough*). I know that gifted authors can write anything -- whether or not it's close to their own life experience -- but I have found that for the most part, authors who write what they know about PWD rather than what they've gleaned from inaccurate pop-culture representations, tend to write better books.

So when I heard about this book, shaped in part by Sharon Draper's own experience as the mother of a child with CP who is nonverbal, I had high hopes. Even though she's not writing about her daughter, her writing must be informed from her experiences - and in some ways, it's really successful. When Draper describes Melody's physical reactions -- really all the ways that everyone can see her from the outside -- it rings true. Her descriptions of Melody's physical reactions are pitch-perfect, as are the reactions she gets from many people around her, the special ed classrooms, and the incredibly frustrating nature of being confined to limited language. Clearly Draper has a lot of insight and an insider perspective that's valuable to us as readers. And she has a worthwhile agenda: she wants young readers to question their assumptions about PWD, including nonverbal people, and to recognize that Melody is brilliant, more than she appears, and underestimated.

I think this is where the premise derails -- from the first page, really. The story is unapologetically didactic, but also stilted in its writing. Melody lacks complexity as a character -- she's brilliant in kind of an Encyclopedia Brown way, with a photographic memory, the ability to retain anything she learns, and perfect spelling. Unfortunately, she has about Encyclopedia's level of depth and well-roundedness as well.

It's not just that this is unlikely -- that people's brains don't develop their neural pathways in quite that orthographic way without a lot of verbal and written practice, regardless of their intelligence. It takes a long, long time with a lot of practice to learn how to be fluent in verbal and written communication, whether you have a disability or not. It doesn't hold water - it's unrealistic and painfully hopeful.

But let's assume that we accept Melody's Encylopedia-Brown-like reality, and suspend disbelief. If we believe that Melody has instant facility with spoken language -- or learned how to use a complex speech device in a single weekend without the support of a speech pathologist -- it makes no sense that Melody wouldn't have been able to communicate effectively with her family and peers. If she has access to even a low-tech letter board (which we know she does), with her perfect spelling and syntax she can communicate almost as effectively as a person who can speak. With a speech device that she can program and use fluently, and the will to use it and 24/7 access to it, she's unstoppable. It's impossible to believe that with such skills and involved parents, she would be so totally disenfranchised in her school and her life in general. Why is she in that isolated special ed classroom in 2010? Where is her IEP and her case worker? She has a 1:1 aide and an effective speech device -- clearly her parents have prevailed through MAJOR negotiations with insurance, school and state funders -- but isn't mainstreamed full-time? Where is her internet, for goodness sakes? It doesn't make any sense, in a real-world context. I could believe it if she had insurmountable barriers to communication, developmental delays, uninvolved or uninformed parents, or a school district that really stonewalled advocacy. Or even if she wasn't the world's best speller. I just can't believe it of her -- and I think it doesn't recognize the many nonverbal people who DO communicate and advocate for themselves effectively despite massive physical impairments. People type out Morse Code with their heels, use a head switch, or use a single working finger to access speech devices.

The book felt like Julie Anne Peters's books to me: yes, the issues in her books DO arise for many LGBTQ youth. Is it realistic that they'd happen to her characters in that way? Not so much.

Oh dear. I could go on about my thoughts on this book for a long time, and I don't mean to disrespect Ms. Draper's intelligence, experience, and hard work as an author. The book shines in the authenticity of its "shown" rather than "told" details - it's in those moments that it rises above the didactic and flat elements of the story. I wish we'd had more moments like those, and I appreciate that they were there.

[Debbie W. · Rating 5 out of 5]

This heartfelt story/audiobook about Melody Brooks, a ten-year-old girl with cerebral palsy, was recommended to me by Jim, a Goodreads friend. I'm very glad he did!

Check out all the "positives"!
(1) I enjoyed Melody's enlightening story about how she was unable to verbally express her intelligent, coherent thoughts, until she was provided with a MediTalker, an electronic device that aids her in communicating with others;
(2) I loved that Melody has an endearing support system - her family, her neighbor, Ms. Violet Valencia, and her educational assistant, Kathryn (btw, EAs are worth their weight in gold!);
(3) I empathized with Melody throughout her story - her frustrations, her sorrows, her victories;
(4) The last hour of this story blew me away! What an ending! I felt anger and heartbreak, yet also triumph!
(5) Narrator Sisi Aisha Johnson did an outstanding, believable job with all the voices!

I highly recommend this book to be shared with children ages 8-12. A fantastic story that endorses empathy, kindness, tolerance and respect!

[Danielle · Rating 5 out of 5]

What an amazing, heartfelt and beautiful story. ❤️ Melody is not like normal kids, she’s smarter and funnier and different. Yes, she has cerebral palsy, but that doesn’t define her. 🤔 Kids can be so darn mean, but the strength and humor Melody has, certainly was refreshing. This is definitely going to be a re-read with my kiddos! 🤗

[Suz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Volunteering at my daughter’s high school library has its perks. Not only do I get to look at books all day, but I get to borrow. I was generifying the senior fiction section before Christmas when I found books on my list such as this one, and books by my Goodreads friends as well: Lynne Stringer and Adele Jones. Very exciting!

I see some weird judgemental reviews here on this book. This book educates. This book is fiction. This book shows us life is not always a cup of coffee easy. Is it?

This book should be required reading for Primary school age. I loved it. The power of the human spirit to have faith in helping another person to learn, and the strength of that person to learn against all adversity and other’s ignorance. This is highly recommended reading for humans of all ages.

So I prepared two answers – one that is polite but kind of wordy, and one that is a little smart-mouthed. To those who are genuinely concerned, I push a button to say, “I have spastic bilateral quadriplegia, also known as cerebral palsy. It limits my body, not my mind” I think that last part is pretty cool. To people like Claire and Molly, I say, "We all have disabilities. What's yours?"


“What would you do if you could fly?” Mrs. V asks…
“I’d be scared to let go,” I type.
“Afraid you’d fall?” she asks.
“No. Afraid it would feel so good, I’d just fly away”. It took me a long time to type that.

[April (Aprilius Maximus) · Rating 5 out of 5]

I can't even begin to explain the importance of this book and how it has the power to influence so many people in how they treat others. I honestly don't even have words to describe my feelings for this book just yet, but once I do, I plan on screaming them from the rooftops so that everyone reads this book.

[Ann · Rating 2 out of 5]

I felt like a terrible person the entire time I read this book because I disliked it so much, especially since I think that it's an important book and a really thoughtful book in many ways. I was impressed with the author for writing a story from the perspective of someone with cerebral palsy, and thought she did a great job of expressing the difficulties of living with that condition. The intentions were good, but wow, I couldn't stand Melody. If someone talked like she does throughout the book that didn't have cerebral palsy, then no reader would like her at all. But since she does, I'm supposed to think she's wonderful. She was completely arrogant and unlikable, and I never felt sympathetic for her because I disliked the way she talked about the people around her so much. I recognize that the author was trying to show her frustrations, but I still didn't like her at all. Additionally, every character in the book is cookie-cutter: from Mrs. V (her very name being a cliche) to the kids in the school - predictable stock characters. I hated the scenes in which Melody's mom "shows" the adults in her daughter's life how wrong they are by humiliating them and "putting them in their place". I hated the climactic interaction with kids at school. I thought the tacked-on Penny ending was completely unnecessary. The book had really great potential, and I still think that the perspective is important to tell, but I haven't disliked a character so much since I had to suffer through The Girls from Ames.

[Rachel L · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 stars!

So I'm going to tell a little story first. My mother is a teacher, has been my entire life. When I was little and sick and couldn't go to preschool she would bring me to her class (a high school class at the time) and I would play with her students. I loved them, still do to this day.

When I began elementary school, that was the first time I ever heard the word "retarded" and it was aimed at students similar to my mother's. I went home and asked my mother if her students were different, and that was when she explained to me what special education students were. I had no idea that her students were any different. It never occured to me. And my mother never treated them like they were different and never coached me to think they were. She let me make up my own mind.

Reading this book made me think a lot about my mother and her students. It also reminded me of a girl I went to elementary school with who is very much like Melody. I couldn't get that girl out of my mind while reading this book, and I probably won't get Melody out of my mind for a long time to come.

Out of My Mind is about an eleven year old girl who is brilliant, and no one knows it. Born disabled, she cannot talk and had trouble moving her limbs. When a new machine gives her the ability to speak, not everyone is ready to accept her as "normal".

Sharon Draper is a brilliant writer. Words flow across the page effortlessly and I am wowed at how she captured and portrayed Melody. I want everyone to read this book. It's so special and it shows us how our perceptions are not always accurate,


Follow me on ♥ Facebook ♥ Blog ♥ Instagram ♥ Twitter ♥

[Julie G · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is my third middle grades read by Ms. Draper, and I will officially declare myself, and both of my daughters, fans of her writing.

We are also, all three of us, bewildered by what a hot mess her books can be.

Both this novel and Double Dutch are riddled with issues, though a more recent work, Stella by Starlight, is a far more polished offering, so maybe she's on her way, finally, with the editing she deserves.

It is almost bewildering to me that this 2010 award-winning novel was able to be published with so many logistical errors in it. You know it's bad when your 10 & 12-year-old kids are contributing in the background “That would never happen at an elementary school.”

Okay, so suspension of disbelief is needed here, and you've just got to get it out of your head that the fifth graders competed in the 5th/6th Whiz Kids quiz team the year before, when they were in 4th, even though the teacher makes it clear that the competition is open, strictly, to 5th and 6th grades only.

(Anyone who either works in an elementary school or has kids in elementary school has the potential of being irritated at times by some of the false representations in this book).

But. . . here's why it's still almost a 5 star read for me:

I have never, in my life, been more transported into a character's life. In this case, I was transported into the mind and body of a child with cerebral palsy.

I felt suffocated. I felt terrified. I felt Melody's every frustration with her inability to communicate with others.

Honestly, I cried throughout this whole book, and so did my 12-year-old. My 10-year-old, who has never cried from a book before, declared, “This book makes it hard for me to breathe.”

I learned, last year, that Ms. Draper is a master of writing three-dimensional characters and their dialogue, but she took that skill to a new level here.

In real life, Ms. Draper is the mother of a child with “developmental difficulties,” and she writes in “Behind the Book” that she was “fiercely adamant that nobody feel sorry for [the protagonist]. She “wanted her to be accepted as a character and a person, not as a representative for people with disabilities.”

She succeeded. I am amazed, in fact, that I can say that I didn't “like” Melody, but I was fascinated by her story. I also felt my capacity for compassion expand by about 100 times, after reading this.

It's not like I trip people in wheelchairs, but my eyes opened in the most profound way, after this read.

Despite some messy plot points, I can honestly contribute that my daughters and I agree that this is one of the most important books we have ever read.

Truly, one of the most important books, of any genre, that any of us have ever encountered.

[D. · Rating 1 out of 5]

2024 Update: Other people on GR have done a better job of eloquently and meticulously explaining what my rant below was trying to say. As a teacher in 2012, I found the book ridiculously unbelievable to the point of being harmful to the very population it was trying to represent. That's the takeaway.


Goodness this book is dreadful. Unrealistic, overly-sentimental, pure drivel.

I am most bothered by the fact that Sharon Draper must really think very poorly of educators. Since EVERY SINGLE teacher (sans one, three paragraph, mention of a third grade teacher who liked to play books on tape for Melody) is a HORRIBLE HUMAN BEING. Not even bad teachers...like awful, horrible, despicable people. Where did these people go to school? Where are the occupational therapists? Where is her case-worker? Education doesn't work like this anymore. Melody's mom could actually SUE the school for their level of disregard for her education.

Like firing. Law suits. THe SH*& has hit the fan type of stuff here.

But to write about it like that's just the way education is? Way to continue teacher-bashing in your own way.

Thanks Ms. Draper. Yikes.

No -- I have no idea why this book has been so acclaimed.

As an educator, I can tell you that kids who were that openly mean to a CP kid would be reprimanded, not encouraged. This book is stuck in some sort of 80s after-school-special time-warp where the bullies are the cool kids and you can still say "retard". What doctor wouldn't encourage more testing? What teachers would write her off? (***Maybe so actually...I just read that Draper has a nonverbal CP kid. Maybe this child is now in his/her 30s and she's ridiculously behind-the-times? OR...maybe this is a subject she shouldn't have touched with a ten foot pole.)

Also, Melody had an alphabet at her disposal and could write early on. Why couldn't she write out "I love you" before receiving her medical-talker-thingie?

This book doesn't make sense...and it was clearly designed to get people to shed some tears and feel all touchy-feely.

I feel like an awful human being for hating this so much -- I understand being a mom of a kid with a disability...you tend to be heightened to the rudeness, the pain of your kid. But I still can't forgive this ridiculous book.

[Irmak · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sizden bu kitabı okumanızı rica edeceğim. Çünkü gerçekten kaç gündür okurken mahvoluyorum. Öfkeden deliye döndüm. İnsanlığımızdan daha doğrusu insan sandığımız yanlarımızdan utandım. Çünkü biliyorum ki bu kitapta anlatılanlar bir yerlerde gerçekten birilerinin başına geliyor.
Mucize'yi okuduysanız ve sevdiyseniz bu kitabı daha çok seveceğinizi söyleyebilirim size. Daha gerçekçi çünkü daha acımasız.
Mucize'nin sonundaki mucizeyi bu kitapta beklemeyin. Çünkü bu kitapta bir mucize gerçekleşmeyecek. Pes etmeyen, muhteşem kalpli Melody'nin hayatı gerçekten çok zor. Ve insanlar acımasız. İnanın doğru kelimeleri bulup bu kitabı anlatamıyorum. Çünkü ben böyle konularda çok hassasım. Ve bu kitap daha doğrusu küçücük çocukların, koca koca insanların davranışları tam olarak bam telime dokundu. Kitabı kesinlikle tavsiye ediyorum.
Sesini asla unutamayacağınız bu cesur kızla tanışmaya hazır mısınız ?

[Rabia Sultana · Rating 5 out of 5]

The book "Out of my mind" by Sharon M. Draper has changed my view of how people view others. This book is the story of a girl who was born unable to speak, walk, write, or anything on her own. Ever since the day she's been born she's always been helped by someone,never able to do something on her, not even talk. She was always seen as the girl in the wheel cahir who couldn't do anything. So when Melody finally can do something on her, can even speak for the first time, why do people still look at her as helpless and weak?
In the school Melody goes to, Spaulding Street Elementary School, she is in a goup with other with "what they call 'disabilities'." They're put in a group from ages 9-11 and they're "learning community"[pg.29:] has been together from the begining of school. But every single one of her teachers with a a exception of one has treated them as if they are babies and know nothing. Even they're classroom has been painted as if they were 4 not 9 or 11,with walls of "dozens of flowers...smiley faces", and "painted with happy bunnies, kittens, and puppies."[pg.30:]They are not little kids, so why is their classroom look like a little kids playhouse. Do people really think that they're not even smart enough to see the difference of their classrooms and others? Like, just becasue they're not as smart as others, does it mean you have to make everythin surrounding them seem as if for babies, even their learning environment?
Of the teachers Ms. Billups was one of the worst, she would make them listen to "Old MacDonald Had a Farm", "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star", and "The Itsy-Bitsy Spider" every morning. I wonder what made her do that, like did she really believe that these kids even if they were 'special' weren't smart enough to understand these songs. Ms.Billups would also go over teh alphabet every single day with them, when they were third graders! This makes me wonder what kind of view society has put on these 'special' kids. Aren't they supposed to be treated the same, to teach them like they are no more different then the other students? Then why is this teacher teaching a third grade class the alphabet and making them listen to PreK songs. Does she really believe that they can listen to the same songs over and over without gettign bored, and really that these third graders haven't learned their alphabet yet. They may have bisabilities, but they are PHYSICAL ablilities, this has nothing to do with their minds and how they are able to comprehend, think, and learn.
Melody proves this when she gets the computer that allows her to talk, and speak (through a computerized voice that is) what is really on her mind. The computer is set up with phrases and sentences that she can speak (through the computer). But people still don't think she's "smart", they still think she can't be "smart", that just because she has disabilites she shouldn't even be able to think or talk. Like what this girl (Clarie) in the book said,"I'm not trying to be mean--honest--but it just never occurred to me that Melody had thoughts in her head."(pg.143) This makes me wonder of how many other people out there think that, that how just beacuse a person is in a wheel cahir or has disabilities you assume that they must not be smart or even think.
This book really made me wonder if people judge others too quickly. That maybe a person is in a wheel chair or has some disablity doesn't necessarily mean that they are 'not smart' or unable to do what we can. There is many people out their with disablities who has accomplished more in their life than many of us, with thos disabilities. They are still living a normal life, going to work (maybe), going to school, just living their life. Yet we still don't think of them as equal, and don't believe that they can be as accomplished as we are, when that is not true at all.
I really liked this book, and thought it was just spectacular. The author really made me remember everything, and i learned so much. I would reccomend this book for all, and even though it is not really a topic we like to discuss it was different and nice to read about. :)

[Josiah · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the best book I have read in years. It's up there with the best books I've ever encountered. I had never read Sharon M. Draper before, but if she's able to even approach this incredible level of storytelling in her other books, then I was definitely missing out on something special.

Where do I start in describing a story of the power and magnitude that marks Out of My Mind? Melody is a fifth-grade girl who was born with cerebral palsy. Her body is crippled and she can do very little for herself. She can't even talk. She can, however, think, and oh, does she do that like no one else. Trapped inside of her speechless, mostly ineffective body is a golden mind that grasps concepts and factual information at a level nothing short of genius. Melody may look helpless to many outside observers who don't get the chance to actually come to know her, but if value is measured in terms of mental capacity for future learning and retention of what has already been taught, then Melody outshines virtually everyone she meets. She is, without exaggerating to say, a wonder.

But life is never going to be easy or simple for a person with the challenges that belabor Melody every single day. Other kids who don't live the life that Melody lives can't really understand, even if they think they can, and if they're not willing to take the time to look deeper and see how smart and how good Melody is in the ways that matter, then Melody will, ultimately, be the one who pays for their ignorance by not having friends. So, Melody understands "unfair". It's encoded in her genes. She knows "unfair" more intimately than most of us ever will.

The plot of this book rocks back and forth, lighting embers of hope for Melody's future and then extinguishing them, giving us things to laugh about followed by scenes that will move almost any reader to tears, both of happiness and grief. It's all so hard, and so painful, yet the writing of Sharon M. Draper is somehow beyond expert, leading us along the novel's rocky road with unsurpassed ability. There isn't a single paragraph of Melody's story that doesn't jump up from the page with life and vigor, filled with intense relevance to our own lives, and drawing us in to care about Melody even though we know that the happy ending we wish for her is just...impossible.

I have no explanation for why this book did not win the 2011 Newbery Medal, or at least a Newbery Honor. Out of My Mind is one of the deepest, strongest, most innately profound books that I have had the privilege to read in a very, very long time. It's an instant masterpiece. I could never be the same after having read it, and there's no more important remark that I could make than that.

[Joe · Rating 3 out of 5]

I feel a bit heartless.

After reading all the Newbery-hype about Out of My Mind, I went into it expecting an absolutely life-changing book about cerebral palsy. After reading Ben Mikaelsen's horrendous Petey this past spring, I was certain Draper's treatment of the subject would be leaps and bounds above that drivel.

It is. And it isn't. (Mostly it is.)

Unlike my feelings about Petey, my emotions about this book are mixed - in the strictest sense of the word. For every element of the book I enjoyed there was something I abhorred.

Good: Melody's characterization is a real eye-opener. She leaps off the page, and there are moments that feel as if she is in a room with you, telling her story. Whether it was the bold-faced font that indicates her 'speaking voice' or her vivid dissecting of the actions of those around her, she is a masterpiece of character development. Her interactions with Ms. V. are particularly heartfelt, especially in the opening chapters of the books when the details of their complex relationship are unveiled.

Bad: As an educator, I am appalled by the portrayal of teachers in this book. Cold-hearted, nasty, lax disciplinarians... there's even a ruthless streak in the history teacher, Mr. Dimming, that's almost caricature-like. This man not only tolerates the taunts of class bullies Claire and Molly (only combating their nastiness once, and in a simpering manner at that), he himself participates in the bullying. Despite being painted as "nice", both the music and English teachers also fail to discipline the mean girls effectively, neither of them attempting to teach the little brats why their behavior is unacceptable and will not be tolerated. Additionally, the special education "teachers" are absurd. In an era of litigation and compulsory inclusion, the professionals who populate H-5 (with the exception of Mrs. Shannon) would have been fired within the first week of school. Despite having been an English teacher for 25 years, Draper seems to have a chip on her shoulder with those in the profession.

Good: Melody is super-smart, and though other reviewers have found that to be a bit of a stretch, I think it's an extremely salient distinction for Draper to make. It's human nature, I think, to assume that those with physical disabilities are somehow mentally disabled as well. That this book gracefully navigates those waters is vitally important, and I think young readers need to have that information... that prejudice... presented to them compassionately, handled with dignity. Draper really succeeds here, because she triggers enough emotional reactions to inspire children to question their own actions around their classmates and to evaluate their own prejudices. There's a particularly powerful scene between Melody and a crewmember at a local television station. Lump, meet throat.

Bad: The two BIG EVENTS at the end. I'm sorry. Both of these ridiculous plot contrivances are what dropped the book down to three stars. The first is predictable and mean-spirited (and further reinforces what a terrible person and incompetent educator Mr. Dimming is). The second, which is foreshadowed in Chapter 19 like a Sledgehammer of Obvious, is completely pointless. Was it designed to make Melody worry about her sister's normality? Was it supposed to draw the family closer together? I have no idea. It felt very last second.

Good: Melody's comeuppance in the end. The trophy and abrupt exit were classic. And her loving revisiting of the characters who populate room H-5? Also incredible. Even though they're flat characters, through Melody's eyes, they are powerful examples of human potential.

Bad: The verb tenses! Sweet God, they were all over the place! Past tense until chapter 10. Then present tense. But only for a chapter. Then it's back to past tense. Then present a few chapters later. Initially I thought, "Hmm. Maybe these are flashbacks." But no. Sometimes we get Melody recounting an event, sometimes we are with her when an event occurs. It's very jarring. Also, Draper's phrasings are so outdated, it's embarrassing. "The bomb"? Is it 1994?

And the ending? Those final paragraphs? Lazy. Lazy, lazy, lazy.

So. Will Out of My Mind win the Newbery? I'm not sure. I still haven't read the other hyped books.

Will it win the Schneider? Probably. In fact, it should.

[Lisa Vegan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I highly recommend this book to everybody, but especially to disabled kids, kids who know disabled kids, anyone who works with disabled kids, especially non-verbal/speech impaired disabled people and people with cerebral palsy or similar neurological motor conditions.

This is an absolutely wonderful book that almost made my favorites shelf. It’s wickedly funny and brutally, wonderfully honest.

I’ve always enjoyed stories about special needs kids, special education, ill children, disabled children, but they’re usually told by someone else, and usually an adult. This children’s novel is narrated by Melody, almost eleven years old, who has a photographic memory and synesthesia (she sees colors and tastes flavors when she hears music), and she is highly intelligent, but because she has cerebral palsy, she cannot talk or write or walk.

I admire how this story evolved. Even though there is what seems to be the obligatory tearjerker “big end” it wasn’t the one (two actually) a reader would have expected the most, and it’s clear Melody’s life does not become perfect, or even as easy as some authors would have implied. However, Melody manages to shine in this book; I love her voice, and I love this book. It’s a very quick read; I inhaled it in less than a day.

Oh, and I just realized how poignant the cover illustration is!

And, I need to add that Butterscotch is now one of my favorite ever dogs in a novel!

[Darla · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have never spoken one single word. I am almost eleven years old.

This has been on my TBR list for quite some time. Any time the book was mentioned, the cover art would spring into my mind. It was always right there on the sidelines. Now that the sequel Out of My Heart is about to be released I had that last push to read this one. It was a compelling story. I am so glad these books with nonverbal young people are being published. Even though we know better, we are still too quick to judge someone by their appearance. It literally takes years for Melody to show the school staff how bright she is. The doctor who tested her initially should lose his license. Such a gross case of malpractice. Melody herself has a delightful voice. I so enjoyed reading her story. For me, though the over-the-top drama in the last 20% was just too much. That's why I am giving this one four stars. Hopefully the narrative in the sequel will be more evenly paced.

[Tamar...playing hooky for a few hours today · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think this is by far one of the best books I have ever read. It’s up there with A Man Called Ove, The Perks of Being a Wallflower and even Ann of Green Gables – the only thing in common being how much I loved the character, and the supporting characters who helped the MCs overcome the obstacles that life has thrown in their path.

Melody was born with cerebral palsy. Her parents watch as other babies and children develop and Melody does not. She is ten years old and in fifth grade when she tells us her story.

Melody has severely limited control over her bodily functions. She can’t hold things, sit or stand up, speak, or do more than partially control her thumbs. She cannot control her spasms or her drooling. However, Melody is intelligent, sharp, and sensitive; she sees colors in music; she absorbs knowledge from the television, and a love of words from the books her parents read to her as a small child. Her adoring parents are supportive and nurturing. Although they sense her intelligence, she is unable to communicate her thoughts, feelings, or needs to them. Mrs. V, their neighbor, is her Anne Sullivan. One or two teachers in her school and Catherine, the college student who becomes her classroom aide, are supportive, but for the most part the rest of the world is horrid or at best, indifferent. Hey, wait a minute, I’m sad to say that if we weren’t reading this book, that might be most of us.

There is much subtle drama in this book, and much joy. We can feel Melody’s suffocation and frustration, her embarrassment of the sloppy task of being fed in front of others, being confronted with a steep staircase leading up into a restaurant where the rest of her classmates are already seated, shame at her lack of ability to control her spastic attacks and drooling in front of her classmates, desolation at being dismissed or condescended to, of not being able to tell her parents how much she loves them and how much she appreciates everything they do for her, terror of finding herself face down on the carpet like a turtle flipped onto its shell. These are only some of the emotions expressed. There are predictable heartbreaking moments in this story, but there are also moments when you want to jump out of your chair to clap and cheer - and others when you want to take your fist and punch the wall. One of the most difficult things to read was the indifference to her feelings – like she was invisible, deaf, dumb, and blind – even after she proved time and time again that she was the smartest person in the inclusion class. Stephen Hawking became an inspiration to her when she realized that if she had a computer operated speech and language board on her wheelchair, she would finally be able to communicate her thoughts, feelings, and needs to others. It wasn’t easy getting her family and mentors to understand what she wanted, but once they understood, they moved mountains for her to get that board.

The cover of this book is perfect – a fish out of water is only part of the story, a fish trapped in the fishbowl, perhaps another part. Described as realistic fiction, this book is so much more than the sum of its parts. We dread the inevitable, and there is much inevitable, we cheer with every success and get pissed-off at anyone who dismisses her or stands in her way….

I hope I become a more sensitive person after reading Melody’s story. I don’t believe I would have the strength to walk even a tenth of mile in her shoes.

At the end of the book there are study/book club questions for discussion. I found it interesting that there was no question for discussion regarding Melody’s own attitude, opinions, or feelings toward the other students in class H-2, where the special students were taught (if you could call it teaching). I mention only because Melody was preoccupied with how she was viewed by other able-bodied classmates but I thought I detected some observations of her own regarding some of her H-2 classmates. Human Nature might also be a point for discussion within a sociological and/or anthropological context.

This was a buddy read with my ten-year-old granddaughter, while I was visiting. I devoured the book in just a few hours and I’m not sure that she ever caught up with me or finished. I tried to interest some of my other grandchildren, but I think that Rick Riordan overshadows (sigh!).

[Chelsea (chelseadolling reads) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Man. Kids can be such jerks.

[Juliana Zapata · Rating 3 out of 5]

Cuando empecé este libro no tenía idea de que iba la trama, y me sorprendió mucho enterarme de que la protagonista que es quien cuenta la historia tuviera parálisis cerebral y que no moviera en absoluto su cuerpo.

Aunque la historia de Melody, es dura, trágica, injusta y en algunas escenas muy cruel; la autora logró que el lector no sintiera lástima por la protagonista, que leyera su historia e intentara ser fuerte y luchar junto a Melody

La historia está lejos de ser una guía o manual para personas con discapacidades pero por supuesto es una historia de superación y lucha.

A pesar de todo esto, no le doy una mejor calificación al libro porque siento que es una historia que tiene los elementos suficientes para convertirse en una novela.

Reseña Completa: http://bastvilard.blogspot.com.co/201...

[Heather K (dentist in my spare time) · Rating 2 out of 5]

Boy, I feel like a terrible person for not liking this book more, but it's just not doing it for me.

When I was in dental school, I did an externship at a famous hospital/educational facility that specializes in children and adults with special needs and medically complex developmental disabilities. I was there for a few months, and I worked on cases that I wouldn't have thought possible before. Most of my patients had cerebral palsy, and I was also lucky enough to study a few Lesch Nyhan syndrom patients. One patient really stuck with me. I'll never forget her because she was a non-verbal CP patient, but she was at the dental center with her sister and her sister kept teasing her. She had all of these sassy replies on her communication board, and I was in awe because I had truly underestimated her mental capabilities at first glance.

After meeting her, I became much more interested in CP and rare diseases in general, so I was really excited to read this story. I got Out of My Mind in ebook format and paperback so I could buddy read it with my daughter. I was pumped after my success with Fish in a Tree, and I was hoping that Out of My Mind would provide the same emotional impact.

However, it was not to be.

After the first few chapters, I grew less and less interested in the plot. I found the mean girls to be a bit too one-dimensional, and it just didn't capture my attention like I was hoping. I wanted it to be good much more than the story actually was good, if that makes sense, and I found myself searching for other books with CP main characters instead.

Good topic, but the execution didn't speak to me.

goodreads|instagram|twitter|blog

[Mariah Roze · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sharon M. Drapper is a fantastic writer! She always covers difficult topics and characters and does it with ease and pleasure to read. My goal is to eventually have read every book by her :)

"Melody is not like most people. She cannot walk or talk, but she has a photographic memory; she can remember every detail of everything she has ever experienced. She is smarter than most of the adults who try to diagnose her and smarter than her classmates in her integrated classroom - the very same classmates who dismiss her as mentally challenged because she cannot tell them otherwise. But Melody refuses to be defined by cerebral palsy. And she's determined to let everyone know it - somehow."

[Karina · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wish they had half stars! The book was a quick, easy read. Melody is an eleven year old girl Cerebral Palsy and just wants to fit in with the other "normal" kids. She is so smart but no one knows this because she cannot talk. Interesting character, rooted for her and her caring family through out the book. I hope kids reading this will rethink their kindness to kids with disabilities. Made me happy and sad and angry.

[Shawna · Rating 3 out of 5]

Melody's the smartest kid in school, with so many things to say, but she can't because she's diagnosed with cerebral palsy leaving her unable to voice any of her thoughts. When her school starts an inclusion program where the special needs kids can join classrooms and get a chance to interact with others, Melody gets a teacher named who runs the Whiz Kids Quiz team. In his class, she meets two girls who are uncomfortable with her and so they start making crude comments; making sure she hears them. Melody befriends a girl named Rose who isn't afraid of standing up to others and helping her. When she hears that there are try-outs for the Whiz Kids Quiz team, her neighbour, her parents and her special aids helper encourages her to try out for the quiz team. She makes the team and leads the team to victory in their regional competition. The prize of winning the regional competition is competing in Washington, D.C. When they see the newspapers, on the front page is a picture of Melody; not the team, just Melody. The other members of the quiz team don't appreciate that. When Melody and her parents arrive at the airport, they find out that their flight is cancelled and the other kids had already left. She felt hurt that none of them bothered to tell her that they had an earlier flight. The next day, when Melody and her mother is about to leave for school, only Melody sees Penny, her little sister, running out of the house. She tries to warn her mother not to drive but the car ends up hitting Penny and she's hospitalized. When Melody arrives at school, the members of the quiz team try to apologize. She turns away from them to show that she doesn't need the people who abandoned her.

I picked this book because many people have recommended it to me.

I finished this book because I was curious as to if she would make the quiz team, if the team would win at the regional competition and also if they would win at the national competition in Washington, D.C.

I think people who like to read realistic-fiction would like this book because it talks about real problems and disabilities that anyone can be diagnosed with or have.

[♛ may · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was recommended to me by a dear goodreads friend. (You know who you are. ;))

Man, did I ever underestimate this book. Here I was thinking it’s going to be one of those cute middle school books that’s all la, la, la, la and sharing is caring, but damn, was I wrong.

Imagine living in a world where you cannot voice your thoughts? To me, that sounds incredibly exhausting. But that’s the life of eleven-year old Melody. Melody has cerebral palsy in other words, she cannot walk, talk, eat, or even use the washroom on her own. But what she can do, is think. Melody is an incredibly sharp and inquisitive girl. She has a dire thirst for knowledge, information, words, ideas, and it’s just so wonderful to read about.

Middle school can be a tough time for most of us. Kids begin to change, they develop opinions, cliques start to form, and they can be hella cruel when they want. And Melody has to put up with all the usual middle school problems along with difficulties of her own. Not very fun.

What I loved most about this book was that we actually got to see the world, day in day out, from Melody’s point of view. You get the feel of how incredibly frustrating it is to not be able to voice your thoughts, the hardship of not being able to do anything for yourself, and always feeling left out. Not to mention the not-so-subtle-bullying she has to deal. But Melody is so strong and bright and just a ball of sunshine. And she’s got quite the humour as well.

There were some unnecessary parts, I must admit. For example, the ending kind of threw me off balance.There wasn’t really any benefit to that happening, it just sort of shook everyone up and left us all like um, okay?

I really enjoyed reading this book and watching as Melody fought head on against the difficulties that were hurtled at her, such an eye-opening book.

“We all have disabilities. What’s yours?”

4 stars!!

[Merve Akıncı · Rating 5 out of 5]

Müthişti. Tereddüte düşmeden alın, okuyun.

[Bookishrealm · Rating 4 out of 5]

Content Warning: Bullying, ableism, accident involving minor, usage of intellectual disability slurs.

I kept hearing that I would find this book to be deep and intense, but my goodness I don't think I anticipated what I read. While Out of My Mind is a little dated, I found the story to be beautiful and enlightening. Out of My Mind is a middle grade novel that focuses on the experiences of Melody who has cerebral palsy. Through the text the reader gets first hand insight to Melody's experiences as she is non-verbal and unable to walk. It was difficult as a reader and even more difficult as a mother to read how other characters in the book characterize Melody as stupid because she is unable to communicate in a traditional way. Even when she has the opportunity to show how brilliant she is through her school's annual quiz bowl competition, students and teachers alike continue to underestimate her abilities. I know that kids can be cruel; however, it was infuriating to see doctors and teachers treat Melody without any regard. I was surprised to find that there were teachers who discourage Melody from keeping up with academic work of the other students, teachers who couldn't be so bothered to read her files to make sure they were providing her with adequate resources. It shocked me, but also reminded me that there are children who have disabilities that experience what Melody went through on a daily basis. I was even shocked and mind-blown at some of the suggestions a doctor made regarding Melody to her mother. It was disgusting.

What Draper does of a fantastic job of is putting the reader into Melody's shoes. When Melody was unable to communicate the simplest of requests, I found myself getting frustrated as she got frustrated. Even when Melody receives the opportunity to upgrade her communication board there were still limitations (i.e. the inability to input words at fast speeds). But Melody never gives up. Does she get discouraged? Yes. Angry? Most definitely as she should; however, there is a level of perseverance and pride that Melody has in the face of adversity that I found to be beautiful. Her longing to communicate like everyone else broke me in ways that I didn't know was possible and it truly spoke to my ignorance of the experiences of those who are non-verbal.

No one in this book is perfect in their treatment of Melody. Even her parents, which is clear towards the end of the book. And I think that mainly has to do with the differences in communication. It takes a lot more for Melody to be able to communicate thoughts and ideas and across the course of the book you see most of the characters become frustrated when they don't seem to completely understand what Melody is intending. And this difference of communication comes to a pitfall at the end of the book that will make any reader grab for a box of tissues.

Books like this prove the depth that middle grade novels have and their ability to tackle tough issues while instilling empathy in their readers. This book definitely made me check my own biases and become aware of how I may have prematurely judged someone on their abilities because they don't move or communicate like me. In some ways it's a sad realization, but I'm glad this book has made me aware of my own personal behaviors and how they the need to be shaped and molded.

[Flor ♡ · Rating 4 out of 5]

“Fuera de mí” me ha dejado con una sensación rara.
Por un lado mucha rabia con los antagonistas del libro, y por otro tristeza, porque si bien la historia de la protagonista es ficción, representa la discriminación y el menosprecio que sufren las personas con capacidades diferentes.

Ojalá fuera más conocido de lo que ya es, y se leyera en los colegios como lectura obligatoria. Pienso que es muy importante para erradicar de una vez por todas la falta de empatía hacia aquellos que sufren, o tienen dificultades para llevar una vida “normal”.

Algunas frases que me marcaron:

”Nunca deja de maravillarme cómo los adultos dan por sentado que no puedo oír. Hablan acerca de mí como si yo fuera invisible, suponiendo que soy demasiado retardada como para entender su conversación.”

“Una persona es mucho más que un diagnóstico en una historia clínica!” ❤️

“Conocía muchas palabras pero no podía leer un libro. Tenía un millón de pensamientos en la cabeza pero no podía compartirlos con nadie.”

“Todos tenemos discapacidades. ¿Cuál es la tuya?”.

[Rana Heshmati · Rating 5 out of 5]

چندین و چند کتاب با همین مضمون خوندم تا حالا. به هر کس معرفی می‌کنم اینطوریه که: خیلی تکراری شده این موضوع دیگه..
ولی،
هربار،
قلبم،
تیکه تیکه می‌شه.
از آدم‌های کم‌توانی که بقیه دست‌کم می‌گیرنشون. مشکلاتشون. حس‌ کنار گذاشته شدن.

[Josie J · Rating 5 out of 5]

I adore this book so much. Melody as a character is so well developed. It was so easy to fall in love with her narrative. I got frustrated when she was frustrated. I can't imagine how hard it is for her. My heart breaks a million times for her. This is one of the first books that I read and loved in my early reading "career". This book has stuck with me and I would happily recommend it to anyone and everyone who will listen. This is one of the first books I remember crying because of. The climax hits hard and it hurts. The explanation breaks my heart as well. I am excited to read the sequel that recently came out but I am nervous that it won't live up to my expectations.