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The Power of the Other: The startling effect other people have on you, from the boardroom to the bedroom and beyond-and what to do about it

Henry Cloud (Goodreads Author)

4.04 · Rating details · 1,472 ratings · 187 reviews

An expert on the psychology of leadership and bestselling author of Integrity, Necessary Endings, and Boundaries For Leaders identifies the critical ingredient for personal and professional wellbeing.

Most leadership coaching focuses on helping leaders build their skills and knowledge and close performance gaps. These are necessary, but not sufficient. Using evidence from f ...more

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Hardcover, 256 pages

Published May 3rd 2016 by Harper Business

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May 01, 2016 Christopher Lawson rated it it was amazing

Dr Cloud starts off this book with a powerful story. One man is near completion of his "SEAL training. However, he's in danger of failing one test; he's about ready to give up. But first, he sees a fellow SEAL, standing on shore. His comrade gives him "a huge fist pump and yell." At this point, "Something happened. Something beyond him. His body jumped into another gear, into another dimension of performance that he had not had access to before." The man went on to complete the SEAL course. This Dr Cloud starts off this book with a powerful story. One man is near completion of his "SEAL training. However, he's in danger of failing one test; he's about ready to give up. But first, he sees a fellow SEAL, standing on shore. His comrade gives him "a huge fist pump and yell." At this point, "Something happened. Something beyond him. His body jumped into another gear, into another dimension of performance that he had not had access to before." The man went on to complete the SEAL course. This powerful effect is what Dr. Cloud calls the "Power of the Other."

Here is the point Dr. Cloud is making: The action that another person takes has PROFOUND impact on us. It's not just some sentimental feeling--it's a REAL impact. As an example, the author notes how oftentimes one person at work, say a boss, can destroy the culture of a team. On the other hand, sometimes just interacting with a single person can upright a disastrous situation.

So, other have incredible power to influence you; the question, how will you deal with this? "How you manger this power is the difference between winning and losing." And, "Relationship affects life and performance. Period."

Most "success" or performance books are all focused on what YOU can accomplish; not much emphasis is on the impact of others. The author points out that this is a huge blunder: "Performance is either improved or dimished by the other people in your scenario."

The doctor explains that it's the QUALITY of relationships that matter. He homes in on those close relationships he calls "Corner 4." These are deep, trusting relationships with others. A real connection is "One is which you can be your whole self the real, authentic you, a relationship to which you can bring your heart, mind, soul, and passion." Dr. Cloud relates an experience in his own life, facing business failure, when he tapped into one of his close connections. The doctor was soon energized, both physically and mentally by this connection.

Getting extra energy from these bonds is real--it's not just some good feeling: "We can feel how our physical and mental energy shifts when we form a connection with someone."

All in all, I found THE POWER OF THE OTHER to be a wonderful book, full of important ideas. This is not a simple book to apprehend; plan to spend some time aborbing these ideas--they are important.

Advane copy for review courtesy of Edelweiss Book Distributors. ...more

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Aug 11, 2016 George P. rated it it was amazing

Henry Cloud, The Power of the Other: The Startling Effect Other People Have on You, from the Boardroom to the Bedroom and Beyond—and What to Do About It (New York: Harper Business, 2016).

Leaders often say, “It’s lonely at the top.” That’s true, of course—at least to an extent—but it’s also tragic. Leadership doesn’t have to be lonely.

In fact, as Dr. Henry Cloud argues in The Power of the Other, success depends on relationship. “The undeniable reality,” he writes, “is that how well you do in life ...more

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May 30, 2016 ☘Misericordia☘ ⚡ϟ⚡⛈⚡☁ ❇️❤❣ rated it it was amazing

Shelves: to-reread

Well, the author tried to go into energy relationship research, thought didn't quite fo that far in order not to sound too new-Agey. Still, a bright read. ...more

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Mar 24, 2018 Carmen Liffengren rated it it was ok

2.5 Stars

I expected a little more from this book because it isn't groundbreaking news that other people have an effect on each other. I mean, it all seems a little obvious. Maybe I was expecting some deep psychology here, but I was a little disappointed. Dr. Cloud does make some good distinctions on the kinds of connections that move us forward or don't. He makes distinctions between 4 types of connections:

Corner 1 - Disconnected: No connection
Corner 2- Bad connection: Those connections that ...more

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Jan 07, 2017 Sai Krishna rated it really liked it

There is a reason I wanted to start my reading habit this year with a book like this:

All along, we are told to focus on what WE do or we CAN do, what is upto us and in our hands and not to worry about the rest. This is a perfectly sensible thing to do and I believed it with all my heart. However, something that happened in my life last year shook this very belief catching by its collar. I sure had given my best, and it was a cumulative effort from over a couple of years and therefore I was cert There is a reason I wanted to start my reading habit this year with a book like this:

All along, we are told to focus on what WE do or we CAN do, what is upto us and in our hands and not to worry about the rest. This is a perfectly sensible thing to do and I believed it with all my heart. However, something that happened in my life last year shook this very belief catching by its collar. I sure had given my best, and it was a cumulative effort from over a couple of years and therefore I was certain I made the cut, but the truth is, I fell short. This came as a shock to me and I was speechless! ( Ironically, I work in speech synthesis !!). I just couldn't digest the fact that sometimes even if we give our 100%, it is not going to be enough.

However, I succeeded, after I myself actually gave up, just because of someone else. I did know various versions of the quote “Want something badly and the universe will get it to you” but I never seriously thought scientifically about it. I wanted to understand this in a more philosophical as well as methodical way and this book caught my attention. This book is a deep dive on the influence our relationships have on our performance, and the author explains the intricacies using stories from his own experience in a manner easy to comprehend. He also covers various assumptions we make and tries to explain why they might not be ideal.

Author starts this book with a story similar to the one I experienced, but at a whole different level, a story of navy SEALs where a certain officer gives and exhausts all his energy into a test and still is about to fail, but manages to succeed and does it in a remarkable fashion because his body and senses go to a next level when one of his colleagues does a small encouraging gesture. This is the power of the other that the author mentions and explores the same throughout.

In another story, the author clearly mentions the pitfall most of us, and certainly me, get into. It is about a man who messes his life up, realizes it and then makes a plan to get back on track. He puts up strict actions for this, in form of meditation, spending more time with family,etc all of which seem really the needed ingredients. The author here mentions that while these actions need to be done, all of these are the ones ‘needed to be done by himself’. In other words, he is the single warrior sort of in all these actions. The problem, author says, is that actions themselves have led him to mess his life in the first place and therefore, instead of doing all the heavy lifting himself, he should try to take the help of others. Otherwise, he will soon get bored/succumed and go back to his messing up pattern. ( May be this is seen with people on weight watch?)

Author speaks about four corners in relationships, explains each one of them in great detail through examples and elucidates how if we are not cognizant, keep falling into vicious circles with three of them: loneliness, bad relationship and the one based on false praising. I could relate to some of the times I was in one of the corners and I found this really useful. He then elaborates further on what the fourth relationship corner looks like and how we can take full advantage of such relationships.

Overall, this was a very fabulous read an I have done a lot of underlining and highlighting which I plan to revisit periodically. I did feel it a bit repititive at times, hence 4 rating. ...more

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Sep 06, 2017 Laurie rated it it was amazing

Shelves: i-learned-something, listened-to-the-audiobook, will-refer-back-to, read-in-2017

Henry Cloud continues to be one of the most informative, practical writers I have ever read. This book details how others can affect us and make us see our more authentic selves. There are four corners where people can live (1-disconnected, 2-bad connections, 3-good but false connections, and 4- which is where we want to live.

Cloud identifies eight characteristics of Corner Four relationships. True connection fuels, gives freedom, requires responsibility, takes the sting away from failure, chal ...more

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Jul 24, 2020 Rick Wilson rated it liked it

Shelves: business, empty-consulting-platitudes

I actually really like the idea proposed by this book. Essentially that “no man is an island” and we can only grow and develop through our experience and relationships with others. Through reinforcement, encouragement, hi fives and butt slaps, we become our best selves. We are social creatures and as such our development is very closely tied to validation and encouragement by others.

But man, the examples used here to flesh out this idea are awful. At one point the author compares humans to a ce I actually really like the idea proposed by this book. Essentially that “no man is an island” and we can only grow and develop through our experience and relationships with others. Through reinforcement, encouragement, hi fives and butt slaps, we become our best selves. We are social creatures and as such our development is very closely tied to validation and encouragement by others.

But man, the examples used here to flesh out this idea are awful. At one point the author compares humans to a cell phone. How without positive social relationships it’s like being a cell phone with no cell phone reception. The horror. At another point the author describes being in a bad relationship like being in a boxing match. And while I appreciate the originality, if your relationship is like a boxing match, do not pass go do not collect $200, please call the police.

The author also blindly quotes Malcolm Gladwell, who himself is quoting bad research. You would be hard pressed to find a quicker way to alienate me as a reader. Malcolm Gladwell is a hack, who cherry picks research and ignores conclusions of studies that he references in order to fit his bubblegum narratives that the public seems to gobble up like intellectual junk food.

This book also contains such gems as, “Their thinker now thought at new energy levels“ and while there’s a lot of talk about “how to level up your thinking” and “shifting your company into high gear” I found myself getting frustrated with the lack of any real directions on how to do that.

To use a terrible analogy of my own.
If this book were an oxygen tank, and it’s content were the oxygen that tank was filled with, and we were in space, dependent on this book’s oxygen to survive.... we all would be dead. But not immediately. It would be a slow painful, drawn out death, with just the smallest trickle of oxygen necessary to make you suffer for an extended period of time. Just barely enough to give you hope more precious air was coming. But it never would. It would just be you and your empty tank, floating into the indifferent void. Surrounded by no other humans to help you “level up your thinker” or provide you with hope. ...more

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Nov 30, 2020 Alicia rated it liked it

Shelves: adult, nonfiction, professional, social-pysch

I think the subtitle was a bit of an overreach for what the book actually stands for. Cloud discusses relationship as the significant factor in excelling and spends a lot of time detailing his four corners (and a lot of time on the fourth corner which is the "best" corner to create, work in, strive for). And you can with a few bits and pieces understand where he's going with the subtitle on how relationships are important. It works, but some of it was redundant. And quite a few analogies-- he co I think the subtitle was a bit of an overreach for what the book actually stands for. Cloud discusses relationship as the significant factor in excelling and spends a lot of time detailing his four corners (and a lot of time on the fourth corner which is the "best" corner to create, work in, strive for). And you can with a few bits and pieces understand where he's going with the subtitle on how relationships are important. It works, but some of it was redundant. And quite a few analogies-- he could have skipped a few but some of his personal stories pulled their weight in his quest to understand similar to the trajectory of Brene Brown in her declarations about vulnerability.

That's not to say it was a bust because I had quite a few Post-it's marking passages and sections to reflect more deeply on- it was the parts that made the book, not the whole. Would I recommend it? That's a solid "sure", but not an exuberant "YES!" It'll meet you where you are.

"For example, research shows over and over again that people trying to reach goals succeed at a much greater rate if they are connected to a strong human support system."

"Ask many people about their greatest accomplishments and challenges overcome, and you will find one thing in common: there was someone on the other end who made it possible."

"'A lot of people have gone further than they thought they could because someone else thought they could.'"

"Self control is a big deal in human performance. Getting better depends on it. You cannot get better if it's not you who has to get better. You are the performer, period. You are the only thing you can control."

"Research into brain circuitry shows that new capacities grow when we have to grapple with a problem ourselves instead of hearing someone tell us how to fix it or watching someone fix it for us. We remember about 10 to 20 percent of what we read or hear or see, but 80 percent of what we experience in such a learning process."

"Science has shown that we can change. We do change. We do get better, but we tend to do it alongside people who believe that too and who are committed to helping us." ...more

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May 26, 2020 Emma rated it really liked it

A valuable insight into the myriad of ways in which we are impacted by others (as the title suggests!). Although some elements of this text were embellished and drawn out longer than perhaps necessary, Cloud's knack for story-telling kept me turning the pages. I was confronted by the realisation that I often dwell in corner 3 for longer than I would like to admit, and I was enlightened to discover the characteristics of positive corner 4 relationships. Love that relationships must be equal parts ...more

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Sep 08, 2018 Nicholas Varady-szabo rated it really liked it

Cloud is the best! He again nails it in this book. His thesis is simple: Only through relationships with others can we grow, mature and conquer the obstacles life throws at us. He uses a model of 4 corners: three dysfunctional ways of approaching relationships, and one life giving one - the corner four relationship, one that involves grace and truth. Readable, and full of his trademark ability to bring clarity to the messy confused-ness of our inner lives.

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Oct 19, 2020 Heather rated it it was amazing

I'm currently going through some significant changes in my life and this book was exactly what I needed. Recognizing how interactions with others affect me and figuring out where I fit in those interactions was so enlightening. I feel like I have a ton of work to do to figure out what corner each relationship I have is so I can decide whether that's a relationship I want to foster or distance myself from. Another excellent Dr. Henry Cloud book!! ...more

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Jan 17, 2021 Elizabeth K rated it liked it

Shelves: 2021, relationships, non-fic, leadership, personal-collection, personal-growth

Rating this three-stars, not because there’s anything wrong with the advice, or that it’s dull, but because it’s simply GOOD advice rather than groundbreaking like the title suggests. I can sum it up as: find yourself some good quality relationships who challenge you to be the best you can be and you’ll go far. In the quest for self improvement we often forget that we NEED others... et voila! The book summed up!

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Feb 24, 2018 Jack Bandy rated it it was amazing

A practical easy read with relatable examples.

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Feb 11, 2019 Ingrid rated it it was ok

I agree with the premise of the book. In my opinion though, it could have been much shorter book, as the concept is easy to grasp. I also thought it was kind of trashy to keep referencing his own past books.

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Jul 05, 2017 Jen rated it it was amazing

I love reading Dr. Henry Cloud!

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Apr 06, 2018 Nicole rated it really liked it

The Power of the Other hit many points in both relationships and the workplace spot on! There were many situations outlined in the book that I imagined scenarios from personal work experience. I strongly recommend this book to anyone who wants to take their emotional intelligence, social skills, or leadership skills to a higher level.

A few strong discussions you can get out of this book:
‣ Self and other - We can't truly change other people, they have to decide to change themselves.
‣ Help build ...more

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Jul 20, 2016 Eric rated it liked it

Much of the conversation about growth is centered on how you as an individual can do better. You can improve your techniques, your thinking, your strategies, your skills, your goals, your communication, etc.

While there is truth to that narrative, this book seeks to makes us more aware that other people have a large impact on our growth and performance. If the needs we have for other people go unrecognized, our growth will be stymied and our performance will be limited. We need to be aware of th ...more

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Feb 01, 2017 Laura Skladzinski rated it it was ok

My office picked this for our business book club and none of us enjoyed it or felt it was worth our time. Just read the subtitle - there, I saved you a few hours.

I did not enjoy this book - I found the advice very obvious (other people have an effect on my life? You're kidding me!) and not very practical. "Corner 4" became the author's catch-all for "all good relationships" without any really actionable advice about the many times in life we're forced to collaborate with people who aren't our be ...more

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May 03, 2016 Mitzie rated it it was amazing

Dr. Cloud takes aim and sinks the putt once again with his latest book, "The Power of the Other"!

This book provides a deeper and richer understanding of not only how "The Power of the Other" impacts us, but how we impact others in relationships.
In this book, you will learn about the four corners of relationship and how to reach the ultimate - four corner relationship status. This is where we all experience the best of relationships whether in our family, friend or work relationships.

"The Powe ...more

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Jan 05, 2017 Christine Norman rated it really liked it

It wasn't until I'd read 2/3 of the book that I understood why he was revisiting all this material on how to get along with your team. He hates all the psychological slogans that encourage people to "find the power within," change your life, love yourself, talk to yourself, think positive thoughts, etc. His message is that you need good relationships to succeed in every area of life. You can't do it alone. The books outlines many ways and ideas to foster those supportive, honest relationships. G ...more

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Apr 21, 2017 kartik narayanan rated it it was ok

Read my full review at my blog https://blog.digitalamrit.com

What is the book about?
“The Power of the Other” is written by Dr. Henry Cloud, author of other relationship oriented bestsellers like “Boundaries”. His writing is non-controversial and easily consumable
“The Power of the Other” is a book about how other people affect us and how our success depends on our relationships with others. This book explores this concept across varying contexts ranging mostly from organizations to our personal li ...more

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Jun 14, 2016 Barbara rated it it was amazing

Henry Cloud is one of my top 5 authors. Ever. His insights are so clarifying, almost stunning. And his practical approach to applying those insights is so helpful. I highly recommend this book, to get to Corner 4 connections with more people in your life, where you not only support each other, but hold each other accountable to being your highest version of yourselves. His theory is that no one can do it alone - we all need Corner 4 connections. I agree.

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Jan 01, 2017 Tenille Shade added it

I've been a fan of Henry Cloud's books for decades, and this one did not disappoint. The power of other in our professional and personal lives is unparalleled. I loved thinking about the four corners: No Connection, Bad Connection, Fake Connection, and Real Connection. The idea that we are like cell phones pinging a signal resonated deeply. I hope to forge new 4th corner relationships in 2017. ...more

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Apr 27, 2016 ~mad marked it as to-read

Hope to be receiving today!

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Dec 02, 2016 Dave Scott rated it it was amazing

You cannot go where you want to go without the other in your life. Not just any "other" rather someone who helps you achieve your goals. No Lone Ranger ever did anything amazing. ...more

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Feb 12, 2018 Gina rated it it was ok

Shelves: non-fiction, biography-autobiography-memoir

More memoir than social science. The book lacks facts, statistics, or references to studies. It is full of anecdotes. The description of the book doesn't match up with the content of the book. ...more

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Sep 08, 2018 dean rated it did not like it · review of another edition

There wasn't an interesting paragraph in the entire book. Full of vague stories about unnamed people and companies with no details whatsoever. ...more

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Aug 12, 2020 Angelina rated it it was amazing

Shelves: personal-development, relationship, re-reads

Notes:
- To love yourself is not enough, it’s important to find someone who can mentor/teach you how to love others just as good a good parenting would have done. Receive love, internalise it (biologically, physiologically mentally though good connections and Modelling alike, external soothing analysed; someone pushes our limits, we learned to act differently, thinking differently) and give it to others- pay it forward
- Corner four: Stop bad feelings by talking to the person directly to address Notes:
- To love yourself is not enough, it’s important to find someone who can mentor/teach you how to love others just as good a good parenting would have done. Receive love, internalise it (biologically, physiologically mentally though good connections and Modelling alike, external soothing analysed; someone pushes our limits, we learned to act differently, thinking differently) and give it to others- pay it forward
- Corner four: Stop bad feelings by talking to the person directly to address the issue rather than going to the third person and seek a validation on your view. Have I shown the people I want to have four corner connection with that I truly listen and understand them. Before you invest a trust in someone ask yourself are they truly listening to you and understanding where you are coming from? Determine Intend and motive. What are they motives in this relationship? Do they have tutor back. Do they really want what’s best for you?"

Lessons:
1. Avoid or ditch all connections that are bad for you, fake or non-existent.
2.Cultivate only those relationships, in which you can truly be yourself.
3. In sincere relationships, people thrive as they can be their true selves and openly admit weaknesses. Your best relationships in life won’t solve your problems for you, but will give you the feedback you need to tackle them on your own. Your connection will give you the freedom to be who you are, do your own thing, and never judge your actions, but that also comes with the responsibility to take matters into your own hands and solve your own problems.
4. Your well-being depends on your brain, your relationships and your mind. Change the story you tell yourself.
5. Meaningful, connected relationships energize us and help us thrive in everything we do.
6. A person with whom you're well-connected will offer you freedom and valuable feedback.
7. Corner four relationships help you to accept failure and bounce back from it.
8. One person’s values and beliefs in a strong relationship can shape another person’s behavior. When you're in a close relationship, you can gain insight that might reshape the way you think and behave through a process called internalisation.
9. Use five criteria to assess if you can trust a person in your life: trust someone only if you're sure that person understands what's important to you; make sure the person has your best interests at heart. Does the person want the best for you?; is this person reliable; assess the person's character. Character isn't just about honesty or integrity, but also about specific character traits. Certain traits can be helpful or harmful depending on the situation;

Concept:
Corner one connection - no connection- alone mode;
Corner two connection - bad connection- you are not good enough experience;
Corner three connection- fake good connection- we go there to feel good; we medicate ourselves; its a sugar high mode;It’s this kind of relationship that’s the hardest to avoid, because it feels good in the short run, but is toxic long term. An affair or drinking buddy would be a good example.
Corner four connection- right connection - this where we get fuelled;

Summary:
Your health and happiness depend largely on the relationships in your life. So do your best to avoid non-connections, bad connections and fake connections. Strive to make real connections that nurture you, help you overcome challenges and improve as a person. Choose wisely when placing your trust in people. Relationships can change your thoughts and behavior, so forge them only with people who are right for you. ...more

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May 24, 2017 Michael Kovaleski rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Classic example of "you get what you want, not what you need"

I went into the reading of this book expecting dark forbidden knowledge on how people affect everything you do and sneaky tricks pertaining to how to dominate that element of competition. I then proceeded to get by brain "beaten" into deserved submission as Dr Cloud revealed to me in no uncertain terms that when I'm not a "Corner Three" narcissist that gets off on criticizing and controlling others, I'm a lonely "Corner One" loser who Classic example of "you get what you want, not what you need"

I went into the reading of this book expecting dark forbidden knowledge on how people affect everything you do and sneaky tricks pertaining to how to dominate that element of competition. I then proceeded to get by brain "beaten" into deserved submission as Dr Cloud revealed to me in no uncertain terms that when I'm not a "Corner Three" narcissist that gets off on criticizing and controlling others, I'm a lonely "Corner One" loser who pathologically and deliberately isolates myself from support and self sabotaging because no one understands me and no one cares to. This book shows you why every failed relationship you had failed, why every successful relationship you had succeeded and the why's/how's pertaining to the failures of talented and driven people who burn themselves out because they have no good support networks of "Others" or even worse if you're like me, that thinking vulnerability is weakness is dooming yourself to mediocrity, neurosis and more. I can't remember the last time I finished a book feeling so ashamed of past behavior that I had no idea was hurting myself and others and yet optimistic about change because so much accurate light was beamed onto the problem. The only complaint I could possibly levy against this book is that in my view, its written by such an expert with seemingly effortless success in this area of life that to many people that need the concepts in this book more than anyone are likely to just dismiss it as feel good utopian psychobabble. Heck, I'm scared because I still find myself largely unable to implement the concepts in the book despite some meaningful progress due to addictions of past behavior but the book is so well written, I can't even lie to myself anymore when I dismiss a potential bandmate out of hand for "not being even close to my level" or cruelly snarl at my step father that his apology meant "nothing" to me after he genuinely tried to make amends for a mistake. But as Cloud states in the book, divisive people are often impossible to reason with because they refuse to take a hard look at themselves and after reading this masterpiece, I'm as determined as I can be not to be one of them ...more

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Dec 18, 2019 Barry Davis rated it it was amazing

An exceptional book on the significance of relationships in personal growth. Subtitled “The Startling Effect Other People Have on You, from the Boardroom to the Bedroom and Beyond -- and What to Do About It,” this highly practical book begins with the story of a U.S. Seal candidate who is clearly not going to be able to complete his test, until a buddy on the beach, the destination of his final swim, keeps pumping his fist and telling him., “You can do it!” Cloud calls this “the neglected truth, An exceptional book on the significance of relationships in personal growth. Subtitled “The Startling Effect Other People Have on You, from the Boardroom to the Bedroom and Beyond -- and What to Do About It,” this highly practical book begins with the story of a U.S. Seal candidate who is clearly not going to be able to complete his test, until a buddy on the beach, the destination of his final swim, keeps pumping his fist and telling him., “You can do it!” Cloud calls this “the neglected truth,” the truth that “the invisible attributes of relationship, the connection between people, have real, tangible, and measurable power” (p. 6).

Cloud presents this truth from what he calls The Four Corners of relationship - Disconnected, A Bad Connection, The Seductively False “Good Connection, and The Real Thing. He describes the basic characteristics of each and how one can vacillate between them. The goal, of course, is Corner Four, the place that he says we should go to “for emotional support, courage, wisdom, expertise, or pure community...and stay there” (p. 68). Cloud writes of the fuel for Corner Four, how to find it and the warning signs that may indicate a shift away from it.

Ever practical, Cloud develops this concept by dealing with freedom and control, and the freedom that includes responsibility. He shares failure he experienced in Defanging the Beast of feelings of judgment failure, guilt, shame, and condemnation, dealing with these perceptions through the power of the other. Topics include seeking the right kind of push, bringing the outside in (internalization), avoiding the triangulation that can damage Corner Four, and building appropriate trust through considering the understanding, intent/motive, ability, character, and track record if potential “others.”

This exceptional book closes with the chapter titled “Nice Guys Don’t Finish Last.” Cloud says “They finish first, and if they are great and good people, they do even better” (p. 216).

According to Cloud, the connection that comes from Corner Four has the following characteristics.
It fuels.
It gives freedom.
It requires responsibility.
It defangs failure and learning.
It challenges and pushes.
It builds structure.
It unites instead of divides.
It is trustworthy. ...more

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Henry Cloud

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Dr. Cloud has written or co-written twenty-five books, including the two million-seller Boundaries. His most recent books are Boundaries for Leaders and Necessary Endings. He has earned three Gold Medallion awards, and was awarded the distinguished Retailers Choice award for God Will Make A Way.

As president of Cloud-Townsend Resources, Dr. Cloud has produced and conducted hundreds of public semina ...more

Books by Henry Cloud

Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life

Safe People: How to Find Relationships That Are Good for You and Avoid Those That Aren't

Necessary Endings: The Employees, Businesses, and Relationships That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Move Forward

Changes That Heal: The Four Shifts That Make Everything Better…And That Anyone Can Do

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“Self-control is a big deal in human performance. Getting better depends upon it. You cannot get better if it’s not you who has to get better. You are the performer, period. You are the only thing you can control.” — 6 likes

“I’m continually amazed at how even extremely high performers’ lives are often still controlled in some way by their family-of-origin or in-law relationships. I wish we had some cosmic algorithm that actually revealed how much lost performance comes from people having to continually negotiate the intrusion of family-of-origin conditioning and interference into their businesses, careers, marriages, parenting styles, life choices, and the like. It literally becomes crippling to even some of the most talented people out there. In these situations, even if the adult umbilical cord is providing food, it’s charging exorbitant rent.” — 4 likes

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Preview — The Power of the Other by Henry Cloud

The Power of the Other: The startling effect other people have on you, from the boardroom to the bedroom and beyond-and what to do about it

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Preview — The Power of the Other by Henry Cloud

The Power of the Other: The startling effect other people have on you, from the boardroom to the bedroom and beyond-and what to do about it

Get A Copy

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Lists with This Book

Community Reviews

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About Henry Cloud

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