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The Power of the Other: The startling effect other people have on you, from the boardroom to the bedroom and beyond-and what to do about it
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The Power of the Other: The startling effect other people have on you, from the boardroom to the bedroom and beyond-and what to do about it

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4.06  ·  Rating details ·  1,196 ratings  ·  158 reviews
An expert on the psychology of leadership and bestselling author of Integrity, Necessary Endings, and Boundaries For Leaders identifies the critical ingredient for personal and professional wellbeing.

Most leadership coaching focuses on helping leaders build their skills and knowledge and close performance gaps. These are necessary, but not sufficient. Using evidence from
...more
Hardcover, 256 pages
Published May 3rd 2016 by Harper Business
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Average rating 4.06  · 
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Start your review of The Power of the Other: The startling effect other people have on you, from the boardroom to the bedroom and beyond-and what to do about it
Christopher Lawson
May 01, 2016 rated it it was amazing
Dr Cloud starts off this book with a powerful story. One man is near completion of his "SEAL training. However, he's in danger of failing one test; he's about ready to give up. But first, he sees a fellow SEAL, standing on shore. His comrade gives him "a huge fist pump and yell." At this point, "Something happened. Something beyond him. His body jumped into another gear, into another dimension of performance that he had not had access to before." The man went on to complete the SEAL course. This ...more
George P.
Aug 11, 2016 rated it it was amazing
Henry Cloud, The Power of the Other: The Startling Effect Other People Have on You, from the Boardroom to the Bedroom and Beyondand What to Do About It (New York: Harper Business, 2016).

Leaders often say, Its lonely at the top. Thats true, of courseat least to an extentbut its also tragic. Leadership doesnt have to be lonely.

In fact, as Dr. Henry Cloud argues in The Power of the Other, success depends on relationship. The undeniable reality, he writes, is that how well you do in life and in
...more
Carmen Liffengren
Mar 24, 2018 rated it it was ok
2.5 Stars

I expected a little more from this book because it isn't groundbreaking news that other people have an effect on each other. I mean, it all seems a little obvious. Maybe I was expecting some deep psychology here, but I was a little disappointed. Dr. Cloud does make some good distinctions on the kinds of connections that move us forward or don't. He makes distinctions between 4 types of connections:


Corner 1 - Disconnected: No connection
Corner 2- Bad connection: Those connections that
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☘Misericordia☘ ~ The Serendipity Aegis ~  ⚡ϟ⚡ϟ⚡⛈ ✺❂❤❣
Well, the author tried to go into energy relationship research, thought didn't quite fo that far in order not to sound too new-Agey. Still, a bright read.
Sai Krishna
Jan 07, 2017 rated it really liked it
There is a reason I wanted to start my reading habit this year with a book like this:

All along, we are told to focus on what WE do or we CAN do, what is upto us and in our hands and not to worry about the rest. This is a perfectly sensible thing to do and I believed it with all my heart. However, something that happened in my life last year shook this very belief catching by its collar. I sure had given my best, and it was a cumulative effort from over a couple of years and therefore I was
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Laurie
Henry Cloud continues to be one of the most informative, practical writers I have ever read. This book details how others can affect us and make us see our more authentic selves. There are four corners where people can live (1-disconnected, 2-bad connections, 3-good but false connections, and 4- which is where we want to live.

Cloud identifies eight characteristics of Corner Four relationships. True connection fuels, gives freedom, requires responsibility, takes the sting away from failure,
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Nicholas Varady-szabo
Sep 08, 2018 rated it really liked it
Cloud is the best! He again nails it in this book. His thesis is simple: Only through relationships with others can we grow, mature and conquer the obstacles life throws at us. He uses a model of 4 corners: three dysfunctional ways of approaching relationships, and one life giving one - the corner four relationship, one that involves grace and truth. Readable, and full of his trademark ability to bring clarity to the messy confused-ness of our inner lives.
Ingrid
Feb 11, 2019 rated it it was ok
I agree with the premise of the book. In my opinion though, it could have been much shorter book, as the concept is easy to grasp. I also thought it was kind of trashy to keep referencing his own past books.
Jack Bandy
Feb 24, 2018 rated it it was amazing
A practical easy read with relatable examples.
Jen
Jul 05, 2017 rated it it was amazing
I love reading Dr. Henry Cloud!
Nicole
Apr 06, 2018 rated it really liked it
The Power of the Other hit many points in both relationships and the workplace spot on! There were many situations outlined in the book that I imagined scenarios from personal work experience. I strongly recommend this book to anyone who wants to take their emotional intelligence, social skills, or leadership skills to a higher level.

A few strong discussions you can get out of this book:
Self and other - We can't truly change other people, they have to decide to change themselves.
Help build
...more
Eric
Jul 20, 2016 rated it liked it
Much of the conversation about growth is centered on how you as an individual can do better. You can improve your techniques, your thinking, your strategies, your skills, your goals, your communication, etc.

While there is truth to that narrative, this book seeks to makes us more aware that other people have a large impact on our growth and performance. If the needs we have for other people go unrecognized, our growth will be stymied and our performance will be limited. We need to be aware of
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Laura
Feb 01, 2017 rated it it was ok
My office picked this for our business book club and none of us enjoyed it or felt it was worth our time. Just read the subtitle - there, I saved you a few hours.

I did not enjoy this book - I found the advice very obvious (other people have an effect on my life? You're kidding me!) and not very practical. "Corner 4" became the author's catch-all for "all good relationships" without any really actionable advice about the many times in life we're forced to collaborate with people who aren't our
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Mitzie
May 03, 2016 rated it it was amazing
Dr. Cloud takes aim and sinks the putt once again with his latest book, "The Power of the Other"!

This book provides a deeper and richer understanding of not only how "The Power of the Other" impacts us, but how we impact others in relationships.
In this book, you will learn about the four corners of relationship and how to reach the ultimate - four corner relationship status. This is where we all experience the best of relationships whether in our family, friend or work relationships.

"The
...more
Christine Norman
Jan 05, 2017 rated it really liked it
It wasn't until I'd read 2/3 of the book that I understood why he was revisiting all this material on how to get along with your team. He hates all the psychological slogans that encourage people to "find the power within," change your life, love yourself, talk to yourself, think positive thoughts, etc. His message is that you need good relationships to succeed in every area of life. You can't do it alone. The books outlines many ways and ideas to foster those supportive, honest relationships. ...more
Barbara
Jun 14, 2016 rated it it was amazing
Henry Cloud is one of my top 5 authors. Ever. His insights are so clarifying, almost stunning. And his practical approach to applying those insights is so helpful. I highly recommend this book, to get to Corner 4 connections with more people in your life, where you not only support each other, but hold each other accountable to being your highest version of yourselves. His theory is that no one can do it alone - we all need Corner 4 connections. I agree.
Tenille Shade
I've been a fan of Henry Cloud's books for decades, and this one did not disappoint. The power of other in our professional and personal lives is unparalleled. I loved thinking about the four corners: No Connection, Bad Connection, Fake Connection, and Real Connection. The idea that we are like cell phones pinging a signal resonated deeply. I hope to forge new 4th corner relationships in 2017.
~mad
Apr 27, 2016 marked it as to-read
Hope to be receiving today!
dean
Sep 08, 2018 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
There wasn't an interesting paragraph in the entire book. Full of vague stories about unnamed people and companies with no details whatsoever.
Gina
More memoir than social science. The book lacks facts, statistics, or references to studies. It is full of anecdotes. The description of the book doesn't match up with the content of the book.
Dave Scott
Dec 02, 2016 rated it it was amazing
You cannot go where you want to go without the other in your life. Not just any "other" rather someone who helps you achieve your goals. No Lone Ranger ever did anything amazing.
Barry Davis
Dec 18, 2019 rated it it was amazing
An exceptional book on the significance of relationships in personal growth. Subtitled The Startling Effect Other People Have on You, from the Boardroom to the Bedroom and Beyond -- and What to Do About It, this highly practical book begins with the story of a U.S. Seal candidate who is clearly not going to be able to complete his test, until a buddy on the beach, the destination of his final swim, keeps pumping his fist and telling him., You can do it! Cloud calls this the neglected truth, the ...more
Michael Kovaleski
Classic example of "you get what you want, not what you need"

I went into the reading of this book expecting dark forbidden knowledge on how people affect everything you do and sneaky tricks pertaining to how to dominate that element of competition. I then proceeded to get by brain "beaten" into deserved submission as Dr Cloud revealed to me in no uncertain terms that when I'm not a "Corner Three" narcissist that gets off on criticizing and controlling others, I'm a lonely "Corner One" loser who
...more
Sherise
Jun 03, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Pros: The Power of the Other is a clear and concise look at the ways people influence and are influenced by their relationships with others. Dr. Cloud identifies the common negative relationship patterns into which people fall and gives practical advice on how to break those patterns in order to succeed in developing the skills and character needed to succeed. Though targeted at business relationships and business success, the principals laid out in book are readily applied to all relationships ...more
Rachel Reding
Sep 25, 2019 rated it did not like it
I bought this book after Dave Ramsey recommended it. I should have recognized just from the subtitle alone that this book is geared towards a niche of people that does not include myself. The subtitle reads, The startling effect other people have on you, from the boardroom to the bedroom and beyond-and what to do about it. Umm, it is not in any way startling to me that people have an effect on each other.

Its a self-help type book aimed for people who are lonely at the top in their business.
...more
Arion Williams
Aug 16, 2018 rated it it was amazing
I'm now able to communicate more effectively to a few relationships that are Corner 1s and Corner 2s. I was so frustrated with these personality traits but it's helpful to get context on how people develop these habits. Empathy is an understated theme throughout... To lead or manage, and recognize that you need others to help you achieve, you have to have empathy or the capacity to empathize and be vulnerable enough to take constructive criticism. Plenty of pearls dropped throughout. One phrase ...more
Eric
Dec 14, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Great ideas and thoughts for improving team performance

I have a leadership role in a small company, and was recommended this book as a resource to improve team performance. As I began reading, I was a bit wary of the ideas that the relationships we make very strongly influence our success. But the author did a great job limiting his discussion to key points and then providing great examples and clarification on how these items are experienced in the real world.

Overall, Id highly recommend it. I
...more
David Mitchell
Jul 04, 2017 rated it really liked it
Im inclined to keep this review to a very short summary of the whole message of the book: find yourself an accountability partner, or partners, who can keep you in top mode and avoid all possible distractors. It is a message that is developed in a number of different ways in books of this genre. The writing style of this book is good in that the author avoids babbling over-and-over in psychology terminology. I borrowed this book from the Sydney based library of the Australian Institute of ...more
Jessika Malo
Dec 02, 2018 rated it liked it
Shelves: psychology
The idea of the book caught my attention right away but the writing bored me. I felt it was too simple and not scientific enough; also it bore me. For some reason I stuck with the book and after the first few two chapters, things started getting better. Later, I learned that the author was not an experienced writer but he was able to make his points well and to add a hint of sarcasm/commentary to his work. The premise of this book moves away from the traditional "it is all about you" to the ...more
Chris
Oct 13, 2018 rated it really liked it
Another great read by Henry Cloud. I enjoy his writing style - it is informative and easy to read yet it doesn't dumb down the topic at hand. At times, he is repetitive in this book and strays a bit, in my opinion, but his use of personal stories and other anecdotes is very useful. Essentially, Cloud makes a compelling argument that healthy "Corner Four" relationships are at the center of every successful person. Without these Corner Four relationships and people in one's life, personal and ...more
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Dr. Cloud has written or co-written twenty-five books, including the two million-seller Boundaries. His most recent books are Boundaries for Leaders and Necessary Endings. He has earned three Gold Medallion awards, and was awarded the distinguished Retailers Choice award for God Will Make A Way.

As president of Cloud-Townsend Resources, Dr. Cloud has produced and conducted hundreds of public
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