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The Pirates! #2
The Pirates! In an Adventure with Moby Dick
The Pirate Captain is in trouble. Eager to appease his crew with a boat that has a functioning mast, fewer holes and cannons that actually fire, he splashes out on the fancy new Lovely Emma, spending six thousand doubloons he doesn’t have. Finding themselves in debt to the beautiful but deadly Cutlass Liz - or the butcher of Barbados, as she’s otherwise known - the pirates need to raise some money fast.
In a desperate race against time our heroes embark on an adventure that will take them from the shores of Nantucket to the bright lights of Las Vegas, to the ends of the earth in search of a mythical white whale, and even, perhaps, into the dark depths of madness. But hopefully they’ll be home in time for tea.
In a desperate race against time our heroes embark on an adventure that will take them from the shores of Nantucket to the bright lights of Las Vegas, to the ends of the earth in search of a mythical white whale, and even, perhaps, into the dark depths of madness. But hopefully they’ll be home in time for tea.
257 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 1, 2005
11 people are currently reading
628 people want to read
About the author
Gideon Defoe
15 books295 followersGideon Defoe never meant to become an author. When Defoe bumped into a woman he had pursued during his time studying archaeology and anthropology at Oxford, they began chatting about what they were up to. Realising that his job temping for Westminster council was not going to win him any romantic points, he told her that he was writing a novel. She asked to see it, at which point he found that he really was writing a novel. His manuscript was originally circulated among friends, who photocopied it and passed it on until, eventually, it fell into the hands of a literary agent.
He was raised by his mother in the south of England. His late father wrote thrillers that featured a lot of sexy Russian spies seducing middle-aged men uncannily like him.
His mother says he is a direct descendant of Daniel Defoe. He says he won't be convinced until he has seen the family tree.
He was raised by his mother in the south of England. His late father wrote thrillers that featured a lot of sexy Russian spies seducing middle-aged men uncannily like him.
His mother says he is a direct descendant of Daniel Defoe. He says he won't be convinced until he has seen the family tree.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 148 reviews
January 12, 2025
The Pirate Captain needs to buy a new ship from the notorious Cutlass Liz. Since the Pirate Captain’s rival Black Bellamy is watching, his pride can’t let him buy anything less than the most expensive ship around. But he buys it with money he doesn’t have. Not yet anyway. In a race against time, the Pirate Captain and his crew desperately need to find a lot of money. Because Cutlass Liz became notorious for a reason.
Even though we meet Ahab in the beginning of the story, it takes quite a while for the titular Moby Dick to show up. The story focuses more on the pirates attempting to make money the easy way, like trying to find buried treasure and gambling what they have in Las Vegas in the hopes of making even more money. The core of the story is once again not the plot, nor is it the characters for that matter. It is the comedy that shines brightest in this series. And in that regard, it delivers.
Even though we meet Ahab in the beginning of the story, it takes quite a while for the titular Moby Dick to show up. The story focuses more on the pirates attempting to make money the easy way, like trying to find buried treasure and gambling what they have in Las Vegas in the hopes of making even more money. The core of the story is once again not the plot, nor is it the characters for that matter. It is the comedy that shines brightest in this series. And in that regard, it delivers.
April 5, 2022
I like good jokes.
So rather than write formal about this funny book I've selected some jokes for you to enjoy before you read this story.
It's made a little hole,' he said. But without missing a beat he picked up one of his portraits—the one of him smiling standing next to a lady-boy on the beach in Thailand—and propped it up over the leak. 'I don't think you can really just cover up holes with pictures, Captain,' said the pirate with a scarf sadly, as a steady stream of water went on dribbling down onto the carpet.
Inside the case hung the Pirate Captain's pride and joy – a huge glistening honey-roast ham. It was about as close as you could get to the platonic ideal of a ham, if Plato had spent more time discussing hams and less time mucking about with triangles.
‘What about you, Jennifer? How’s the knife-throwing coming along?’ ‘Oh, I’ve not really tried it yet,’ said Jennifer airily. ‘But it can’t be that hard, can it? It’s only knives after all. Just to be on the safe side, I thought I’d use the pirate with a peg-leg as my partner, seeing as he’s already the pirate with a peg-leg as my partner, seeing as he's already so used to losing bits and pieces.' Jennifer smiled at the pirate with a peg-leg. The pirate with a peg-leg looked a bit miserable.
‘It’s been a while since we’ve had an angry mob after us, hasn't it, Captain?’ said the pirate in green. ‘Not since the adventure with the Catholic girls’ school!’ said the pirate with long legs.
He’s very brave. He once took on the entire Royal Navy single-handed, whilst we were all asleep. They boarded us in the dead of night and stole our last few bottles of grog, and then the Pirate Captain fought them off but he was too late to save the grog. We didn't even know a thing about it until the next morning when we realized the grog was gone and he explained what had happened to us over breakfast. The whole fight had given him a terrible headache.
Helpful hint - Whale Conservation
Try to restrict your consumption of whale meat and ambergris to special occasions.
Enjoy!
So rather than write formal about this funny book I've selected some jokes for you to enjoy before you read this story.
It's made a little hole,' he said. But without missing a beat he picked up one of his portraits—the one of him smiling standing next to a lady-boy on the beach in Thailand—and propped it up over the leak. 'I don't think you can really just cover up holes with pictures, Captain,' said the pirate with a scarf sadly, as a steady stream of water went on dribbling down onto the carpet.
Inside the case hung the Pirate Captain's pride and joy – a huge glistening honey-roast ham. It was about as close as you could get to the platonic ideal of a ham, if Plato had spent more time discussing hams and less time mucking about with triangles.
‘What about you, Jennifer? How’s the knife-throwing coming along?’ ‘Oh, I’ve not really tried it yet,’ said Jennifer airily. ‘But it can’t be that hard, can it? It’s only knives after all. Just to be on the safe side, I thought I’d use the pirate with a peg-leg as my partner, seeing as he’s already the pirate with a peg-leg as my partner, seeing as he's already so used to losing bits and pieces.' Jennifer smiled at the pirate with a peg-leg. The pirate with a peg-leg looked a bit miserable.
‘It’s been a while since we’ve had an angry mob after us, hasn't it, Captain?’ said the pirate in green. ‘Not since the adventure with the Catholic girls’ school!’ said the pirate with long legs.
He’s very brave. He once took on the entire Royal Navy single-handed, whilst we were all asleep. They boarded us in the dead of night and stole our last few bottles of grog, and then the Pirate Captain fought them off but he was too late to save the grog. We didn't even know a thing about it until the next morning when we realized the grog was gone and he explained what had happened to us over breakfast. The whole fight had given him a terrible headache.
Helpful hint - Whale Conservation
Try to restrict your consumption of whale meat and ambergris to special occasions.
Enjoy!
January 20, 2013
Have at you, you scabrous coves! Here be humourous treasure as The Pirates! have an adventure with whaling that features that miserable old pirate Ahab.
Things you might learn about during this adventure:
Debt
Whale Conservation
Nantucket
Multiple uses for physeter macrocephalus
The migratory course of the accursed Great White Whale
How The Pirates! once had an adventure with a mosquito
All the things I said about the first book remain true for this one, Python, ham, Discworld, cutlasses, Snicket, 42, it's all there and this time it's a lot less episodic and more a case of humour squeezed in to the story of Moby Dick/desperately trying to avoid being sliced and diced by angry debtors who The Pirates! wish they'd never borrowed money from.
BUT it's just not as brilliantly stupid as the adventure with Scientists. There are a lot of belly laughs and it's still too rude to be suggested reading for children but it felt like Defoe had either run out of ideas or was desperately trying to be a bit sensible at times.
I am still looking forward to more adventures with The Pirates! especially as the list of titles listed as being available in the series include one with Jennifer Garner, one with the G.O.P. and one where The Pirates! get sexy. But first I shall move on to The Pirates! In An Adventure With Communists as it's the only one left in my local library.
Things you might learn about during this adventure:
Debt
Whale Conservation
Nantucket
Multiple uses for physeter macrocephalus
The migratory course of the accursed Great White Whale
How The Pirates! once had an adventure with a mosquito
All the things I said about the first book remain true for this one, Python, ham, Discworld, cutlasses, Snicket, 42, it's all there and this time it's a lot less episodic and more a case of humour squeezed in to the story of Moby Dick/desperately trying to avoid being sliced and diced by angry debtors who The Pirates! wish they'd never borrowed money from.
BUT it's just not as brilliantly stupid as the adventure with Scientists. There are a lot of belly laughs and it's still too rude to be suggested reading for children but it felt like Defoe had either run out of ideas or was desperately trying to be a bit sensible at times.
I am still looking forward to more adventures with The Pirates! especially as the list of titles listed as being available in the series include one with Jennifer Garner, one with the G.O.P. and one where The Pirates! get sexy. But first I shall move on to The Pirates! In An Adventure With Communists as it's the only one left in my local library.
February 17, 2015
Want a book that doesn't take itself too seriously and that's gonna make you feel to the floor laughing? Look no more.
The Pirate Captain and his crew are not fearsome pirates that wreck havoc on the seven seas, so don't expect your usual pirate story. This a well-done parody.
The Pirate Captain wants to trade his old ship for a new one whose mast doesn't fall every second so he goes to Cutlass Liz and end up buying one he can't afford. So begins the quest to find six thousands doubloons to pay Liz with, otherwise she will kill them all in a uncomfortable way. Lucky for Pirate Captain, he runs into Ahab, who is tired of looking for the White Whale to exert his revenge and decides to put a reward for six thousand doubloons on his head.
There's a lot of laugh out loud moments in this book. I particularly liked the one when the Pirate Captain and his crew are brainstorming to find a way to find the money and the suddenly realized the could rob a boat since they are pirates so it kind of makes sense. It's really funny because the Pirates are pretty stupid but in a lovable kind of way.
Give it a try if you are looking to cheer up.
The Pirate Captain and his crew are not fearsome pirates that wreck havoc on the seven seas, so don't expect your usual pirate story. This a well-done parody.
The Pirate Captain wants to trade his old ship for a new one whose mast doesn't fall every second so he goes to Cutlass Liz and end up buying one he can't afford. So begins the quest to find six thousands doubloons to pay Liz with, otherwise she will kill them all in a uncomfortable way. Lucky for Pirate Captain, he runs into Ahab, who is tired of looking for the White Whale to exert his revenge and decides to put a reward for six thousand doubloons on his head.
There's a lot of laugh out loud moments in this book. I particularly liked the one when the Pirate Captain and his crew are brainstorming to find a way to find the money and the suddenly realized the could rob a boat since they are pirates so it kind of makes sense. It's really funny because the Pirates are pretty stupid but in a lovable kind of way.
Give it a try if you are looking to cheer up.
August 30, 2009
Read this with my kids. They're 5 and 9 and while the humor and vocabulary was a bit advanced for them, it was still a blast and I got to explain things like cutlasses, harpoons, and Nantucket, while doing (really badly!) every British accent I could think of from Alan Rickman to Joan Collins.
Come on, folks! Pirates! With a sorta Monty Python/ Douglas Adams sense of humor (the White Whale stalks Captain Ahab through...wait for it...Las Vegas!!) What could possibly be more fun.
Come on, folks! Pirates! With a sorta Monty Python/ Douglas Adams sense of humor (the White Whale stalks Captain Ahab through...wait for it...Las Vegas!!) What could possibly be more fun.
January 1, 2019
First published on Booking in Heels.
At the end of The Pirates! in an Adventure with Moby Dick, there are ten pages of other (pretend) titles by the same author, and I love this book so much that I would happily read every single one of them. I'm sure The Pirates! in an Adventure with Heavy Petting and The Pirates! in an Adventure with a Steep Hill would sell especially well.
Enough about the other books, let's look at this one :) In the interests of full disclosure, I haven't read Moby Dick (the proper book) yet, although I did buy it last week. You don't really need it to understand this book though, just as long as you know the very basic summary - Ahab is Captain obsessed with hunting a great white whale that once bit his leg off. Wow, that was hard, wasn't it?
The recent film actually encompasses this book as well, so the trailer suddenly makes a lot more sense. Here, the Pirate Captain suddenly realises that their ship is looking a bit decrepit, so they head off to Cutlass Liz to get a shiny new one, The Lovely Emma. Unfortunately they can't quite afford to pay her just yet so they take on a contract for Ahab to eliminate that famous white whale.
He looked at his second-in-command seriously. "I'm making a list of when it's acceptable for a pirate to cry."
"That sounds very important, Captain," said the pirate with a scarf, fiddling axiously with his eye-patch.
"So far I've got: one - when holding a seagull covered in oil. Two - when singing a shanty that reminds him of orphans. Three - when confronted by the unremitting loneliness of the human condition. Four - chops. I've just written the word 'chops.' Not really sure where I was going with that one. Any ideas?"
Just like the other books, ...with Moby Dick has an awesome sense of humour that mixes silly slapstick with subtle innuendo to produce one of the funniest books I've read all year. I also love the informative footnotes that provide fun facts, like the origination of the phrase 'cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey' or that it is suspected whales use the magnetic field of the Earth for navigation - that's why so many whales are beached at places where there is an anomaly in the Earth's magnetic field. I did run off to check the facts so I didn't look like a complete moron after this post went up, but thankfully they are all true!
These books are just good fun. They're tiny, but I could happily read them over and over and I doubt they'd ever get stale. I've just done a quick Google, and apparently Gideon Defoe is in talks with Aardman Animation to turn the last two books into a movie as well. I know, I'm raving and I'm sorry. I'll stop when you finally cave in and buy a copy :)
At the end of The Pirates! in an Adventure with Moby Dick, there are ten pages of other (pretend) titles by the same author, and I love this book so much that I would happily read every single one of them. I'm sure The Pirates! in an Adventure with Heavy Petting and The Pirates! in an Adventure with a Steep Hill would sell especially well.
Enough about the other books, let's look at this one :) In the interests of full disclosure, I haven't read Moby Dick (the proper book) yet, although I did buy it last week. You don't really need it to understand this book though, just as long as you know the very basic summary - Ahab is Captain obsessed with hunting a great white whale that once bit his leg off. Wow, that was hard, wasn't it?
The recent film actually encompasses this book as well, so the trailer suddenly makes a lot more sense. Here, the Pirate Captain suddenly realises that their ship is looking a bit decrepit, so they head off to Cutlass Liz to get a shiny new one, The Lovely Emma. Unfortunately they can't quite afford to pay her just yet so they take on a contract for Ahab to eliminate that famous white whale.
He looked at his second-in-command seriously. "I'm making a list of when it's acceptable for a pirate to cry."
"That sounds very important, Captain," said the pirate with a scarf, fiddling axiously with his eye-patch.
"So far I've got: one - when holding a seagull covered in oil. Two - when singing a shanty that reminds him of orphans. Three - when confronted by the unremitting loneliness of the human condition. Four - chops. I've just written the word 'chops.' Not really sure where I was going with that one. Any ideas?"
Just like the other books, ...with Moby Dick has an awesome sense of humour that mixes silly slapstick with subtle innuendo to produce one of the funniest books I've read all year. I also love the informative footnotes that provide fun facts, like the origination of the phrase 'cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey' or that it is suspected whales use the magnetic field of the Earth for navigation - that's why so many whales are beached at places where there is an anomaly in the Earth's magnetic field. I did run off to check the facts so I didn't look like a complete moron after this post went up, but thankfully they are all true!
These books are just good fun. They're tiny, but I could happily read them over and over and I doubt they'd ever get stale. I've just done a quick Google, and apparently Gideon Defoe is in talks with Aardman Animation to turn the last two books into a movie as well. I know, I'm raving and I'm sorry. I'll stop when you finally cave in and buy a copy :)
December 7, 2012
Hilarious! As I have read "Moby Dick" in its entirety, I loved the not-so-subtle jabs at that novel. My favorite quote: "The other pirates were doing their best to make conversation with the whaler crew, but they were a strange bunch, and most of their stories placed a lot more emphasis on icebergs and interminable months spent at sea rather than feasts and fighting. Also, just as one of the whalers would actually seem to be getting to the point of an anecdote, they were liable to wander off suddenly on long and rather dull tangents about whale anatomy or things like that." HAHAHA I love literary humor.
I love that the Pirate Captain really has no idea what he's doing, but always ends up spectacularly completely the task at hand. I also love his attachment to his Prize Ham and was quite sad at the end of this adventure when he lost it. I look forward to seeing what happens in the next Adventure!
The illustrations in the front and back insides are also entertaining - the map in the front tracks the location of the white whale around the US (where he picks up a casino dealer's hat in Las Vegas, enjoys some beach time in SC, and picks up Mickey Ears in FL!). I also enjoy the "other great titles in The Pirates! series" list with such made up title adventures as "with the G.O.P", "with the Pope", "with Mongol Hordes", "with Mormons", "with Boggle", "with Jennifer Garner", etc., and the one I'd most like to read if it existed: "with Maths and Numbers". The list goes on for 5 pages of hilarity ending with "The Pirates! Are Overdoing It A Bit".
I love that the Pirate Captain really has no idea what he's doing, but always ends up spectacularly completely the task at hand. I also love his attachment to his Prize Ham and was quite sad at the end of this adventure when he lost it. I look forward to seeing what happens in the next Adventure!
The illustrations in the front and back insides are also entertaining - the map in the front tracks the location of the white whale around the US (where he picks up a casino dealer's hat in Las Vegas, enjoys some beach time in SC, and picks up Mickey Ears in FL!). I also enjoy the "other great titles in The Pirates! series" list with such made up title adventures as "with the G.O.P", "with the Pope", "with Mongol Hordes", "with Mormons", "with Boggle", "with Jennifer Garner", etc., and the one I'd most like to read if it existed: "with Maths and Numbers". The list goes on for 5 pages of hilarity ending with "The Pirates! Are Overdoing It A Bit".
November 12, 2022
Defoe's 'The Pirates!' series tell you more or less all you need to know about my sense of humour. I love them, especially the one with Communists. This absurd adventure is as hilarious as ever. To determine whether you'd enjoy it, consider this quote:
If that amused you, and you appreciate character names like 'the octagon-faced pirate', you will enjoy this book. I was also delighted by the lengthy list of other titles in the series, at the end of the book. It includes such gems as, 'The Pirates! In An Adventure With Richard Dawkins' and 'The Pirates! In An Adventure With Wasps'. I'd definitely read those.
'Ahab paused, and turned to the pirates. "You might say that they are having a whale of a time."
The pirates looked at Ahab. There was an embarrassed silence.
"That was a joke," said Ahab. "Whale of a time. You see?"
The pirates went on looking at Ahab.
"I rarely make jokes," said Ahab a little sadly. "I don't really have the delivery."'
If that amused you, and you appreciate character names like 'the octagon-faced pirate', you will enjoy this book. I was also delighted by the lengthy list of other titles in the series, at the end of the book. It includes such gems as, 'The Pirates! In An Adventure With Richard Dawkins' and 'The Pirates! In An Adventure With Wasps'. I'd definitely read those.
March 7, 2016
3.5
This book doesn't require too much thought or participation, so I won't put much thought into my review of it. It's also been just under a month since I actually went and read it, so my thoughts are a lil' cloudy, but it just wasn't as good as The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists. Sure, it was fun, breezy; an easy read, but while the plot matches Scientists in inventiveness, it just doesn't have the same spark to it. Alas, Ahab was fun, Pirate Captain's writing skills were surprisingly adroit and Blue/Blackbeard (I can't remember his name) is a delicious villain. Perhaps I might not read another Gideon Defoe novel but I can't say I didn't enjoy it.
This book doesn't require too much thought or participation, so I won't put much thought into my review of it. It's also been just under a month since I actually went and read it, so my thoughts are a lil' cloudy, but it just wasn't as good as The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists. Sure, it was fun, breezy; an easy read, but while the plot matches Scientists in inventiveness, it just doesn't have the same spark to it. Alas, Ahab was fun, Pirate Captain's writing skills were surprisingly adroit and Blue/Blackbeard (I can't remember his name) is a delicious villain. Perhaps I might not read another Gideon Defoe novel but I can't say I didn't enjoy it.
August 29, 2014
An endearing little story about a pirate and his devoted prized ham....I think.
May 4, 2023
Fun little book read for a challenge
June 1, 2012
* * * * 1/2
The pirate crew have just bought a fancy new ship to replace their current ailing vessel (it's really not normal for the mast to fall down three times a week), but they don't have ready cash to pay for it. What to do to avoid incurring the wrath of Cutlass Liz, pirate-ship dealer and the bloodthirstiest lass on the high seas? Apparently there's a fella named Ahab who's offering a sizeable reward for the capture of a certain white whale…
This is the second in "The Pirates" series by Gideon Defoe. I picked it up after seeing The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists (the North American title is "The Pirates: Band of Misfits"), an Aardman Animations feature based on the first book in the series. I did actually request the first book as well, but this one arrived earlier. It may be more helpful for those completely new to the series to start with the first book, or perhaps see the movie (I did find that helped with visualizing the characters).
I whipped through this book in very short order -- it has only 152 pages and the book itself is quite small. I also spent pretty much the entire book grinning like an idiot. I did think I would spend more time laughing out loud than actually happened, but non-stop grinning is pretty good too. It's very, very silly, which can be just what the doctor ordered in some instances. And I really did almost laugh out loud on the bus when I caught this dig at Moby-Dick:
"just as one of the whalers would actually seem to be getting to the point of an anecdote, they were liable to wander off suddenly on long and rather dull tangents about whale anatomy or things like that."
Fortunately this book is not dull. Will you like it, you ask? Well, Eric Idle (he of Monty Python fame) endorsed the first book, so if you like Pythonesque humour you may like this as well. And if you like stories about mishaps on ships, there are plenty of those here for you to enjoy. I would probably not recommend reading all of the Pirates! books in one sitting though -- even while reading it I could tell that one at a time was enough. Save it for a day when you can really use some cheering up.
The pirate crew have just bought a fancy new ship to replace their current ailing vessel (it's really not normal for the mast to fall down three times a week), but they don't have ready cash to pay for it. What to do to avoid incurring the wrath of Cutlass Liz, pirate-ship dealer and the bloodthirstiest lass on the high seas? Apparently there's a fella named Ahab who's offering a sizeable reward for the capture of a certain white whale…
This is the second in "The Pirates" series by Gideon Defoe. I picked it up after seeing The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists (the North American title is "The Pirates: Band of Misfits"), an Aardman Animations feature based on the first book in the series. I did actually request the first book as well, but this one arrived earlier. It may be more helpful for those completely new to the series to start with the first book, or perhaps see the movie (I did find that helped with visualizing the characters).
I whipped through this book in very short order -- it has only 152 pages and the book itself is quite small. I also spent pretty much the entire book grinning like an idiot. I did think I would spend more time laughing out loud than actually happened, but non-stop grinning is pretty good too. It's very, very silly, which can be just what the doctor ordered in some instances. And I really did almost laugh out loud on the bus when I caught this dig at Moby-Dick:
"just as one of the whalers would actually seem to be getting to the point of an anecdote, they were liable to wander off suddenly on long and rather dull tangents about whale anatomy or things like that."
Fortunately this book is not dull. Will you like it, you ask? Well, Eric Idle (he of Monty Python fame) endorsed the first book, so if you like Pythonesque humour you may like this as well. And if you like stories about mishaps on ships, there are plenty of those here for you to enjoy. I would probably not recommend reading all of the Pirates! books in one sitting though -- even while reading it I could tell that one at a time was enough. Save it for a day when you can really use some cheering up.
February 21, 2013
When the pirates run out of cannonballs, they have to improvise:
"We could fire the limes, sir," suggested the pirate with a scarf. "They're sort of the right shape."
"Aaaarrr. Fair enough," said the Pirate Captain. "But dip it in tar so they think it's a cannonball. Otherwise we risk looking stupid."
"Can we wear those dinosaur masks...?" asked the pirate who was always getting nosebleeds.
Of course they can, says the Pirate Captain. The crew of nameless pirates is off on another adventure, this one with Ahab, obsession, and white whales. Also with Las Vegas, used boat salespeople, show business, and hams. Wacky fun, plenty of laugh aloud moments and irreverence. Defoe is a clever and funny writer. And he makes me want to be a pirate.
"We could fire the limes, sir," suggested the pirate with a scarf. "They're sort of the right shape."
"Aaaarrr. Fair enough," said the Pirate Captain. "But dip it in tar so they think it's a cannonball. Otherwise we risk looking stupid."
"Can we wear those dinosaur masks...?" asked the pirate who was always getting nosebleeds.
Of course they can, says the Pirate Captain. The crew of nameless pirates is off on another adventure, this one with Ahab, obsession, and white whales. Also with Las Vegas, used boat salespeople, show business, and hams. Wacky fun, plenty of laugh aloud moments and irreverence. Defoe is a clever and funny writer. And he makes me want to be a pirate.
September 4, 2016
The Pirates need a new ship, so they borrow heavily to buy a luxurious ship. Threatened with Cutlass Liz’s payment plan, they seek out six thousand doubloons, which happens to be Ahab’s reward for the great white whale that bit off his leg. Hijinks ensue in this hilarious, cleverly written, silly adventure that is highly reminiscent of Monty Python meets Monkey Island: surrealist, childlike imagination and logic, in this charming and hilarious take on Moby Dick. Grade: A
July 13, 2015
These books are so fantastically clever and funny it makes me sad more people don't read them.
March 25, 2019
"Caw! Caw! I'm a sexy lady albatross!"
November 21, 2008
these pirates! books are strangely brilliant. the main character is the nefarious pirate captain, known throughout the seven seas for his luxurious beard & ravenous appetite for ham. his pirate crew is known only by distinguishing features: the albino pirate, the pirate who always wears red, the pirate with the bedroom eyes, etc. in this book, they team up with captain ahab, who is of course searching for the great white whale. or rather, they team up in opposition to ahab. as it were, the pirate ship needs some repairs, & the pirate captain, not being so handy with money, goes all out in commissioning a fairly excessive new vessel. he borrows far beyond his means to pay for the ship, but then learns that there is a reward for capturing the great white whale, in the amount of exactly the money needed to pay for the new ship. so the pirates set out to capture the whale, win the prize money, & not have to be run through with a cutlass for their outstanding pirate ship debt. as it turns out, the whale is more wily than the pirate capatain anticipated, but never fear, for he has a solution, which involves elements of the jonas bible story & a lot of paint. these books are so clever. everyone should read them, even if, likeme, they are bored of the excessive romanticization of pirates.
June 29, 2012
Review Taken From The Pewter Wolf
The Pirate Captain can't seem to keep out of trouble, can he? After he splashes out on the fancy new ship, the Lovely Emma, he finds himself spending six thousand doubloons he doesn't have. In debt to the beautiful but deadly Cutlass Liz, who will happily cut them easily in two, he and his crew must get the cash. And fast!
Along the way in their desperate race to find the cash before time runs out (Cutlass Liz gave them an hourglass, filled with the sands that are actually grounded-up bones from pirates who didn't pay on time), the Pirate Captain and his crew go from Nantucket, Las Vegas and then in search of a mythical white whale...
Now, I really have high hopes for this, and though it wasn't up to par with Scientists (am going to use shorthand, if that alright), it is just as mad, bonkers and funny as its predecessor. (Although from chapter 11 onwards, I started see Black Bellamy as Jeremy Piven... not sure if Black Bellamy is meant to be a hottie, but whoever rocks your boat... [just realised, after quick research, that he's the voice of Black Bellamy in the movie. How did I not know that?])
And, this series was written for adults in mind... Apparently. But you guys will get the stupidness of the Pirate Captain!
The Pirate Captain can't seem to keep out of trouble, can he? After he splashes out on the fancy new ship, the Lovely Emma, he finds himself spending six thousand doubloons he doesn't have. In debt to the beautiful but deadly Cutlass Liz, who will happily cut them easily in two, he and his crew must get the cash. And fast!
Along the way in their desperate race to find the cash before time runs out (Cutlass Liz gave them an hourglass, filled with the sands that are actually grounded-up bones from pirates who didn't pay on time), the Pirate Captain and his crew go from Nantucket, Las Vegas and then in search of a mythical white whale...
Now, I really have high hopes for this, and though it wasn't up to par with Scientists (am going to use shorthand, if that alright), it is just as mad, bonkers and funny as its predecessor. (Although from chapter 11 onwards, I started see Black Bellamy as Jeremy Piven... not sure if Black Bellamy is meant to be a hottie, but whoever rocks your boat... [just realised, after quick research, that he's the voice of Black Bellamy in the movie. How did I not know that?])
And, this series was written for adults in mind... Apparently. But you guys will get the stupidness of the Pirate Captain!
August 28, 2007
Ham is very important to a pirate diet, and Ahab's okay even though he started out in that horrid Moby Dick book. (The Pirates help him track the whale. To Las Vegas and beyond...)
February 17, 2008
Ridiculously hilarious.
April 4, 2010
Very silly and very funny.
April 24, 2014
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 4, 2018
I smirked a few times but otherwise this was just really, really tired - or I'm just an old cynic. One or the other.
February 7, 2017
After the main-mast falls over for the third time in a week the pirate with a scarf reluctantly and cautiously approaches the Pirate Captain about perhaps getting a new boat. After admitting to his number two that perhaps covering the holes in his quarters with dashing pictures of himself isn't the best way to keep a boat afloat, seeing as a stiff breeze could conceivably kill off half the pirate crew and the Pirate Captain himself has never bothered to learn to swim he agrees that they go to Nantucket and Cutlass Liz's boatyard. There they run into two interesting people. One is Ahab, a dour whaler who is searching the world for the great white whale who took his leg off with a big chomp, the other is the Pirate Captain's Nemesis, Black Bellamy. Black Bellamy eggs the Pirate Captain on to buying a boat, The Lovely Emma, which the crew can in no way afford. Desperate to quickly get the cash for fear of Cutlass Liz and her ways of dealing with those who don't pay the pirates go in search of treasure! When that fails they try gambling. When that fails they try putting on a Vegas show. When that fails the pirate in red suggests perhaps they try some piracy? When that fails they just might take up Ahab's quest, they keep running into him and he's now offering a reward equal to the cost of their new boat. But can the Pirate Captain and his crew really succeed where Ahab has failed? And if they do can they succeed before Cutlass Liz gets violent?
What seems like years ago now, probably because it was, I remember seeing a few of Gideon Defoe's Pirates! books at Half Price Books and thinking they looked rather fun. I promptly forgot about them because do you realize the number of books I look at on a daily basis? It's seriously staggering. But shortly thereafter Lauren Willig mentioned them in passing as being hilarious so this confluence of events led me to order the first two books, handily sold as one volume, and I put it on my bookshelf and promptly forgot about them again. Fast forward to 2012 and Aardman Animation has adapted the first book for the screen. David Tennant, Hugh Grant, Russell Tovey, no wait, not Russell Tovey in the US, grumble, grumble, but once again I thought of the books and again promptly forgot. For some reason all my encounters with Gideon Defoe's work was promptly forgotten until his third book, The Pirates! In an Adventure with Communists, was picked out of the hat for book club in 2016. Not being one to start in the middle of a series I picked up my copy of the first two books, promptly fell in love, ordered the next three books and plundered my way through them all.
The thing is, I've always had a soft spot for pirates. This started quite young with my parents reading Irene Haas's The Maggie B. to me. A young girl wishes for a boat to travel the world in with her little brother. I wanted a boat just like it for myself. A pirate ship in miniature with flora and fauna and the coziest rooms you could ever imagine that weathered all storms. As I grew up there were Lego pirate ships and Playmobil pirate ships that actually floated helmed by my Star Wars figures. There were hideouts down by the railway tracks and in my back yard with hammocks, just like on a real pirate ship. There were other books too like Peter Pan and The Princess Bride, and tons of movies from The Goonies to Muppet Treasure Island to Hook. Finally there was Pirates of the Caribbean, opening night at Point Cinema on the UltraScreen with my girlfriends. Some were there to see Johnny Depp, some to see Orlando Bloom, and some to see an anvil three stories tall. I was there for the pirates!
But these Pirates! by Gideon Defoe, they are a breed apart. They are the love children of Blackadder and the briny deep, with historical cameos thrown in just as much as historical accuracy is thrown out. With this lovability that makes you just want to take them home give them a big feast predominately of ham and tell them a good bedtime story before tucking them in for the night. Gideon Defoe's writing combines the wit and love of footnotes of Terry Pratchett with the absurdity of Monty Python. Yet it's so uniquely his own that while I can draw comparisons all day it will never do justice to a series of books that need to be read for their hats and their love of ham. And I'm not joking that once you start you won't be able to stop until you've read them all. From Darwin and Bobo, the "man-panzee," to Ahab and what hunting the great white whale does to the Pirate Captain's sanity, to Wagner trying to blacken the name of Communism, to beekeeping on St. Helena where Napoleon causes quite a ruckus, to Byron and the Pirate Captain forming a true bromance while the Pirate Captain tries to woo Mary Godwin away from Shelley, you will just pillage your way through Defoe's prose.
Yet what makes this series really unique is that, aside from them being kind of hopeless as pirates, is that the characters names aren't really names, instead being character descriptions. There's the Pirate Captain and his faithful number two, the pirate with a scarf, there's the pirate in green, the pirate with rickets, the albino pirate, Jennifer, and every one's least favorite pirate, the pirate in red. While this could be viewed as just a humorous joke at the readers expense, I mean, think how many times we as readers when faced with a new story with oodles of characters has picked up on a character trait to remember them all by? Instead I don't think it's about readers and the inability to remember names, instead I think it's a clever conceit. While yes, there is a bit of poking fun at stereotypes, I think it actually goes beyond this and is making the character archetypes. The Pirate Captain is THE DEFINITIVE pirate captain. He's the only one that matters, suck it Black Bellamy! Just like the pirate with a scarf is the perfect number two, and the pirate in red is the perfect red shirt for us to hate on. These are the lovable essence of all the pirates we wanted to sail the high seas with as a kid and therefore we gleefully go with them wherever that may be. Even if there might be ghosts. And we all know how scared pirates are of ghosts!
In fact I think that the film by Aardman Animation, The Pirates! Band of Misfits, is doing a disservice to the books. While these pirates are true characters by making them cartoonishly animated it has turned them into caricatures. This movie has lessened them. In the books they are larger than life fiendish friends, on the screen they are a kind of boring movie. Which is really odd when you consider that Gideon Defoe wrote the screenplay. When I think back to when I first saw the movie, it in no way made me want to rush out and read the books, which is such a shame. Think of all those people out in the world who are judging these books based on that movie? The movie has far more "presence" and it's overshadowing these lovely, sweet, and comical adventures. When reading the books I thought how much they reminded me of the TV series Galavant. There's an absurdity and a gallantry and a sense of humor that makes it similar to The Pirates! Plus done as live action, there's a basis in reality with having actors like the brilliant Timothy Omundson bring the characters to life. This humor works best with the dichotomy of the absurd versus the real. Which leads me into my next point, when is there going to be a live action movie with Timothy Omundson as the Pirate Captain?
As for why I chose to pick their adventure with Ahab as my favorite? Partly it's because I had yet to read them hanging out with the Romantics last year, but also it has to do with this balance of fantasy and reality that elevates the humor in these books. In taking The Pirates! and placing them in their natural setting you get to see how atrocious they actually are as pirates. The fact that when they desperately need money to pay for their new boat that actual piracy is their second to last resort shows where their priorities lie. They'd rather look at clouds and have feasts with ham. Again and again it's brought home how not at home they are on the sea. They know nothing about whales! As for mermaids... well, the Pirate Captain did date a rather attractive halibut for three months thinking the rather normal fish was something more... While Black Bellamy may be a successful pirate, he isn't that enjoyable a pirate to be around. He's too suave, too together. I actually like my pirates a little on the lost side. Perhaps that is the one thing that the movie got right? They are a band of misfits, and I love them so much for not conforming to any stereotype. They are archetypes and I love them!
What seems like years ago now, probably because it was, I remember seeing a few of Gideon Defoe's Pirates! books at Half Price Books and thinking they looked rather fun. I promptly forgot about them because do you realize the number of books I look at on a daily basis? It's seriously staggering. But shortly thereafter Lauren Willig mentioned them in passing as being hilarious so this confluence of events led me to order the first two books, handily sold as one volume, and I put it on my bookshelf and promptly forgot about them again. Fast forward to 2012 and Aardman Animation has adapted the first book for the screen. David Tennant, Hugh Grant, Russell Tovey, no wait, not Russell Tovey in the US, grumble, grumble, but once again I thought of the books and again promptly forgot. For some reason all my encounters with Gideon Defoe's work was promptly forgotten until his third book, The Pirates! In an Adventure with Communists, was picked out of the hat for book club in 2016. Not being one to start in the middle of a series I picked up my copy of the first two books, promptly fell in love, ordered the next three books and plundered my way through them all.
The thing is, I've always had a soft spot for pirates. This started quite young with my parents reading Irene Haas's The Maggie B. to me. A young girl wishes for a boat to travel the world in with her little brother. I wanted a boat just like it for myself. A pirate ship in miniature with flora and fauna and the coziest rooms you could ever imagine that weathered all storms. As I grew up there were Lego pirate ships and Playmobil pirate ships that actually floated helmed by my Star Wars figures. There were hideouts down by the railway tracks and in my back yard with hammocks, just like on a real pirate ship. There were other books too like Peter Pan and The Princess Bride, and tons of movies from The Goonies to Muppet Treasure Island to Hook. Finally there was Pirates of the Caribbean, opening night at Point Cinema on the UltraScreen with my girlfriends. Some were there to see Johnny Depp, some to see Orlando Bloom, and some to see an anvil three stories tall. I was there for the pirates!
But these Pirates! by Gideon Defoe, they are a breed apart. They are the love children of Blackadder and the briny deep, with historical cameos thrown in just as much as historical accuracy is thrown out. With this lovability that makes you just want to take them home give them a big feast predominately of ham and tell them a good bedtime story before tucking them in for the night. Gideon Defoe's writing combines the wit and love of footnotes of Terry Pratchett with the absurdity of Monty Python. Yet it's so uniquely his own that while I can draw comparisons all day it will never do justice to a series of books that need to be read for their hats and their love of ham. And I'm not joking that once you start you won't be able to stop until you've read them all. From Darwin and Bobo, the "man-panzee," to Ahab and what hunting the great white whale does to the Pirate Captain's sanity, to Wagner trying to blacken the name of Communism, to beekeeping on St. Helena where Napoleon causes quite a ruckus, to Byron and the Pirate Captain forming a true bromance while the Pirate Captain tries to woo Mary Godwin away from Shelley, you will just pillage your way through Defoe's prose.
Yet what makes this series really unique is that, aside from them being kind of hopeless as pirates, is that the characters names aren't really names, instead being character descriptions. There's the Pirate Captain and his faithful number two, the pirate with a scarf, there's the pirate in green, the pirate with rickets, the albino pirate, Jennifer, and every one's least favorite pirate, the pirate in red. While this could be viewed as just a humorous joke at the readers expense, I mean, think how many times we as readers when faced with a new story with oodles of characters has picked up on a character trait to remember them all by? Instead I don't think it's about readers and the inability to remember names, instead I think it's a clever conceit. While yes, there is a bit of poking fun at stereotypes, I think it actually goes beyond this and is making the character archetypes. The Pirate Captain is THE DEFINITIVE pirate captain. He's the only one that matters, suck it Black Bellamy! Just like the pirate with a scarf is the perfect number two, and the pirate in red is the perfect red shirt for us to hate on. These are the lovable essence of all the pirates we wanted to sail the high seas with as a kid and therefore we gleefully go with them wherever that may be. Even if there might be ghosts. And we all know how scared pirates are of ghosts!
In fact I think that the film by Aardman Animation, The Pirates! Band of Misfits, is doing a disservice to the books. While these pirates are true characters by making them cartoonishly animated it has turned them into caricatures. This movie has lessened them. In the books they are larger than life fiendish friends, on the screen they are a kind of boring movie. Which is really odd when you consider that Gideon Defoe wrote the screenplay. When I think back to when I first saw the movie, it in no way made me want to rush out and read the books, which is such a shame. Think of all those people out in the world who are judging these books based on that movie? The movie has far more "presence" and it's overshadowing these lovely, sweet, and comical adventures. When reading the books I thought how much they reminded me of the TV series Galavant. There's an absurdity and a gallantry and a sense of humor that makes it similar to The Pirates! Plus done as live action, there's a basis in reality with having actors like the brilliant Timothy Omundson bring the characters to life. This humor works best with the dichotomy of the absurd versus the real. Which leads me into my next point, when is there going to be a live action movie with Timothy Omundson as the Pirate Captain?
As for why I chose to pick their adventure with Ahab as my favorite? Partly it's because I had yet to read them hanging out with the Romantics last year, but also it has to do with this balance of fantasy and reality that elevates the humor in these books. In taking The Pirates! and placing them in their natural setting you get to see how atrocious they actually are as pirates. The fact that when they desperately need money to pay for their new boat that actual piracy is their second to last resort shows where their priorities lie. They'd rather look at clouds and have feasts with ham. Again and again it's brought home how not at home they are on the sea. They know nothing about whales! As for mermaids... well, the Pirate Captain did date a rather attractive halibut for three months thinking the rather normal fish was something more... While Black Bellamy may be a successful pirate, he isn't that enjoyable a pirate to be around. He's too suave, too together. I actually like my pirates a little on the lost side. Perhaps that is the one thing that the movie got right? They are a band of misfits, and I love them so much for not conforming to any stereotype. They are archetypes and I love them!
September 27, 2023
Had a jolly old time
April 2, 2019
This series is delightful. This book is hilarious and lighthearted and brings me joy. Loved it!
June 13, 2019
"Piratical ethics: Not stealing from a man that offers you grog is just about at the top of the list", is one of the many points of etiquette one learns in this installment of The Pirates!
Voiced by the same actor that did the first book, the characterizations is delightful, yet, in this he has an American character; hearing a British person attempt an American accent gives me empathy for how British people feel when an American attempts a British accent. From from what I have heard in years past, most Brits make Americans sound like New York gangsters of the 30s. In this, John Lee's Ahab sounds part Elvis, part cowboy.
The absurdity quotient slides low in this work's first half, giving it more of a lightly tingled air of chuckles in the atmosphere of its anachronisms. The focus is more upon the allusions to Moby Dick, and the trouble the Pirates find themselves as they attempt to pay off a debt, in schemes befitting comic characters. It wraps up tightly by revealing the importance of a prized ham. As in the previous installment, there are lists of helpful information.
More lessons: getting into debt is not a matter to be taken lightly, also making an extravagant gesture to impress a girl is pretty stupid, and most importantly of all, the grass might look greener in show business, or whaling, or something like that but that when it comes down to it, you're often better off sticking with what you know, so long as what you know is kicking about the High Seas being a Pirate that is.
Learn More About section offers legitimate information regarding debt counseling, whale conservation, and Nantucket.
Elements of this book appear in the Aardman film.
Voiced by the same actor that did the first book, the characterizations is delightful, yet, in this he has an American character; hearing a British person attempt an American accent gives me empathy for how British people feel when an American attempts a British accent. From from what I have heard in years past, most Brits make Americans sound like New York gangsters of the 30s. In this, John Lee's Ahab sounds part Elvis, part cowboy.
The absurdity quotient slides low in this work's first half, giving it more of a lightly tingled air of chuckles in the atmosphere of its anachronisms. The focus is more upon the allusions to Moby Dick, and the trouble the Pirates find themselves as they attempt to pay off a debt, in schemes befitting comic characters. It wraps up tightly by revealing the importance of a prized ham. As in the previous installment, there are lists of helpful information.
More lessons: getting into debt is not a matter to be taken lightly, also making an extravagant gesture to impress a girl is pretty stupid, and most importantly of all, the grass might look greener in show business, or whaling, or something like that but that when it comes down to it, you're often better off sticking with what you know, so long as what you know is kicking about the High Seas being a Pirate that is.
Learn More About section offers legitimate information regarding debt counseling, whale conservation, and Nantucket.
Elements of this book appear in the Aardman film.
June 19, 2012
The Pirates! In an Adventure with Moby Dick: Reissued is a very short book; it takes less than an hour to read. It's obviously aimed at prepubescent boys who are heavily into silly humour and some jokes and the sexual innuendo will be above their head. I'm a grumpy old geezer who get's it, hopefully, but does my age preclude me from getting the silly jokes? I should hope not. I will happily watch and re-watch an Aardman production, and I read a fair number of YA books every year. Furthermore I would like add in my defense that I consider myself a fan of the likes of Terry Pratchett, that is someone who reads a LOT of humourous books.
I bought this book based on what I've already seen of the forthcoming animated movie and because it was a 'Daily Deal' for the Kindle.
Humour is a very personal thing no doubt, and I can see why many children and some adults will think this is funny, but it is definitely not "awesome", "brilliant" or "outstanding". The plotting leaves an awful lot to be desired, the writing style meanders between age levels, several of the jokes are too mature for the target readership and, worst of all, the whole effort seems very heavy handed. The word ham-fisted comes to mind, ham being something the author seems to be obsessed with.
I wanted to like this, but I'm sorry to say I didn't and could not bring myself to award more than one star.
I bought this book based on what I've already seen of the forthcoming animated movie and because it was a 'Daily Deal' for the Kindle.
Humour is a very personal thing no doubt, and I can see why many children and some adults will think this is funny, but it is definitely not "awesome", "brilliant" or "outstanding". The plotting leaves an awful lot to be desired, the writing style meanders between age levels, several of the jokes are too mature for the target readership and, worst of all, the whole effort seems very heavy handed. The word ham-fisted comes to mind, ham being something the author seems to be obsessed with.
I wanted to like this, but I'm sorry to say I didn't and could not bring myself to award more than one star.
August 13, 2008
I love this series. Its dumb, but I just laugh out loud every time I pick the books up. Gideon Defoe brings back The Pirates! on another exciting adventure out at sea. The pirate's ship is in need of some repairs and so they set out to meet up with Cutlass Liz, the scariest she-pirate on the open sea. She ate twenty babies one time! Cutlass gives the pirates a fine boat on credit in which they must pay it back before the pirate bone dust in her timer runs out. Off the pirates go, led by the Pirate Captain to find the funds to save their lives. Along the way they meet Ahab who is searching for the White Whale who took his leg. And you can only imagine how these crazy pirates try to help him.
If you're not embarrassed to laugh out loud on public transportation, then these books will help the ride be just a little bit more entertaining. I would call this a round trip read, but have another one ready! I finished the book too quickly and had to listen to someone snore the entire ride home.
If you're not embarrassed to laugh out loud on public transportation, then these books will help the ride be just a little bit more entertaining. I would call this a round trip read, but have another one ready! I finished the book too quickly and had to listen to someone snore the entire ride home.
June 11, 2010
"The Pirates! In an Adventure with Ahab" is like the other pirate book by this author. It is a hilarious parody of a pirate adventure. It only makes sense that they would get involved in a whaling expedition. That's exactly what they do. They set sail after a white whale for an old man named Ahab.
A text to text connection I can make is from this book to the book "The Old Man and the Sea". This connects because in the Old Man in the Sea he was devoting himself to hunting down this fish he wanted to catch. In "The Pirates!" the pirates had made it their only mission to catch the white whale. THEy both were despaerate to catch these animals. It is a text to text connection because it is between 2 books.
I enjoyed reading this book because the silly nature of the way it was written. It made it more fun to read. Also I have never read a pirate comedy before so it was different for me. That is why I gave it 4 stars. I would recommend this book for anyone who likes pirate books. Also if you like funny books this one will make you laugh.
A text to text connection I can make is from this book to the book "The Old Man and the Sea". This connects because in the Old Man in the Sea he was devoting himself to hunting down this fish he wanted to catch. In "The Pirates!" the pirates had made it their only mission to catch the white whale. THEy both were despaerate to catch these animals. It is a text to text connection because it is between 2 books.
I enjoyed reading this book because the silly nature of the way it was written. It made it more fun to read. Also I have never read a pirate comedy before so it was different for me. That is why I gave it 4 stars. I would recommend this book for anyone who likes pirate books. Also if you like funny books this one will make you laugh.
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