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Saving Graces: Finding Solace and Strength from Friends and Strangers
She charmed America with her smart, likable, down-to-earth personality as she campaigned for her husband, then vice-presidential candidate John Edwards. She inspired millions as she valiantly fought advanced breast cancer after being diagnosed only days before the 2004 election. She touched hundreds of similarly grieving families when her own son, Wade, died tragically at age sixteen in 1996. Now she shares her experiences in Saving Graces , an incandescent memoir of Edwards’ trials, tragedies, and triumphs, and of how various communities celebrated her joys and lent her steady strength and quiet hope in darker times.
Edwards writes about growing up in a military family, where she learned how to make friends easily in dozens of new schools and neighborhoods around the world and came to appreciate the unstinting help and comfort naval families shared. Edwards’ reminiscences of her years as a mother focus on the support she and other parents offered one another, from everyday favors to the ultimate test of her own community’s strength—their compassionate response to the death of the Edwards’ teenage son, Wade, in 1996. Her descriptions of her husband’s campaigns for Senate, president, and vice president offer a fascinating perspective on the groups, great and small, that sustain our democracy. Her fight with breast cancer, which stirred an outpouring of support from women across the country, has once again affirmed Edwards’ belief in the power of community to make our lives better and richer.
Edwards writes about growing up in a military family, where she learned how to make friends easily in dozens of new schools and neighborhoods around the world and came to appreciate the unstinting help and comfort naval families shared. Edwards’ reminiscences of her years as a mother focus on the support she and other parents offered one another, from everyday favors to the ultimate test of her own community’s strength—their compassionate response to the death of the Edwards’ teenage son, Wade, in 1996. Her descriptions of her husband’s campaigns for Senate, president, and vice president offer a fascinating perspective on the groups, great and small, that sustain our democracy. Her fight with breast cancer, which stirred an outpouring of support from women across the country, has once again affirmed Edwards’ belief in the power of community to make our lives better and richer.
384 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2006
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July 4, 2012
I started reading this book during the John Edwards' trial... this book provides an interesting, albeit one-sided, perspective of how a marriage can unravel while the wife is in complete denial. I noted the first problem arose when Elizabeth sought solace in the computer and Internet chat rooms after the death of her son, Wade. Although understandable, it seemed to me that she spent an inordinate amount of time talking with other people, not her husband, about her innermost feelings of grief. Meanwhile, she said very little about her husband's own grief process other than to remark HOW HE HELPED HER in her grief process. I couldn't help but to wonder how much SHE HELPED HIM through this awful time in their lives, or was he pretty much left on his own island?
I don't want to judge either of them, however, because I would think that the death of a child would turn both parents inward, licking their own wounds, with no energy to reach outwards to help each other. But this is what causes so many marriages to crumble after the death of a child. Meanwhile, I think that once political celebrity entered their lives, Elizabeth got so caught up with the thrill of the power and glamour of it all, that she lost her way a bit. She seemed to have no trouble having not one, but two, "replacement babies" that were pawned off on caretakers as she enjoyed the whirlwind life of a politician's wife's life. (I can't help but to wonder if she kept a certain emotional distance from the children born after her son's death because she couldn't bear the thought of losing a child again and grieving the way she had grieved over her son.) I can't fault her for this -- it was escapism, pure and simple. Any one of us might have followed the same path. And if she had any inkling that John's constant departures from her might signal another woman was involved, one can understand why she would have been in utter denial. She needed the political life, and the belief that her life had meaning by supporting John in his career, to give her some kind of foundation to stand on after Wade's death. She could not afford to let that foundation crumble over some blond bimbo.
The best part of this book is Elizabeth's rather lengthy description of her grief process after her son died. I think anyone who has ever lost a child would find solace in this part of the book and realize they are not alone in their feelings. Elizabeth was remarkably honest, and it hurt me as a mother to read it. My heart more than wept reading these passages, it bled.
However, in summary, I think this book's title is too short. It should read: "Saving Graces, Finding Solace and Strength from Friends and Strangers, but NOT my Husband."
I don't want to judge either of them, however, because I would think that the death of a child would turn both parents inward, licking their own wounds, with no energy to reach outwards to help each other. But this is what causes so many marriages to crumble after the death of a child. Meanwhile, I think that once political celebrity entered their lives, Elizabeth got so caught up with the thrill of the power and glamour of it all, that she lost her way a bit. She seemed to have no trouble having not one, but two, "replacement babies" that were pawned off on caretakers as she enjoyed the whirlwind life of a politician's wife's life. (I can't help but to wonder if she kept a certain emotional distance from the children born after her son's death because she couldn't bear the thought of losing a child again and grieving the way she had grieved over her son.) I can't fault her for this -- it was escapism, pure and simple. Any one of us might have followed the same path. And if she had any inkling that John's constant departures from her might signal another woman was involved, one can understand why she would have been in utter denial. She needed the political life, and the belief that her life had meaning by supporting John in his career, to give her some kind of foundation to stand on after Wade's death. She could not afford to let that foundation crumble over some blond bimbo.
The best part of this book is Elizabeth's rather lengthy description of her grief process after her son died. I think anyone who has ever lost a child would find solace in this part of the book and realize they are not alone in their feelings. Elizabeth was remarkably honest, and it hurt me as a mother to read it. My heart more than wept reading these passages, it bled.
However, in summary, I think this book's title is too short. It should read: "Saving Graces, Finding Solace and Strength from Friends and Strangers, but NOT my Husband."
May 22, 2007
Elizabeth Edwards writes so well about grief. I expecially found her book full of humor, wisdom, and warmth. I do wish her well with her current bout with cancer, she needs to live to become our first lady because she would be a fantastic advisor to a president (as she is a fantastic advisor to anybody who connect with her, I suspect)
May 25, 2009
I don't know why I was was interested in this book. John Edwards is too liberal for my tastes. Although I did end up voting for Obama. But that's far into the future and so is the saga of Elizabeth and John Edward's marriage. Probably I choose it because my son is way out there liberal and it was something to discuss with him. I know why I finished the book. Elizabeth Edwards is an excellent writer and much of it was joyful to read. Her writing about the death of her 16 year old son was honest and raw. She interests me.
April 3, 2019
It was really hard to read, knowing what we all know now, and the future pains she would have to endure. A true hero! RIP Elizabeth.
May 4, 2011
While I admire Elizabeth Edwards for the strength she showed publicly throughout her battle with breast cancer and her husband's infidelities, this book wasn't for me. I'm not sure what I was expecting exactly, but it wasn't Saving Graces.
The first chapter drew me in and I did enjoy reading about her childhood as a military brat, but after that, reading the book became a chore. I finally stopped about halfway through. Losing a child is a tragedy that I wouldn't wish upon any parent, but one or two chapters about her late son would have sufficed. After a while, her recounting her grief became more than a touch sanctimonious and made her into such a martyr.
Needless to say, I will not be reading Resilience: Reflections on the Burdens and Gifts of Facing Life's Adversities. Both books will be going back to the library tomorrow.
The first chapter drew me in and I did enjoy reading about her childhood as a military brat, but after that, reading the book became a chore. I finally stopped about halfway through. Losing a child is a tragedy that I wouldn't wish upon any parent, but one or two chapters about her late son would have sufficed. After a while, her recounting her grief became more than a touch sanctimonious and made her into such a martyr.
Needless to say, I will not be reading Resilience: Reflections on the Burdens and Gifts of Facing Life's Adversities. Both books will be going back to the library tomorrow.
September 19, 2008
Saving Graces is about Elizabeth Edwards emotional struggle with the impact of her son Wades death and the discovery of the re-occurance of cancer. My motivation for reading the book is to understand the rationale of both her and her husbands pursuit of the presidential nomination. Why undertake such an arduous endeavor when the focus of her life should be on her treatment and recovery from cancer. I am trying to understand the man and what went into making this decision.
The book is well written and Elizabeth Edwards is very much her own woman.
The book is well written and Elizabeth Edwards is very much her own woman.
September 4, 2007
I really enjoyed her story; I picked it up because I found Elizabeth and John's story interesting and close to home for me. I laughed, I cried, I cried some more and I finished the book feeling like I new this woman and her story well. I wish she were running for President!
April 23, 2017
She wonderfully expresses the raw emotions of grief.
July 13, 2016
Elizabeth Edwards was the wife of John Edwards, a Democratic senator, an unsuccessful presidential primary candidate in 2004 and 2008, and running mate for John Kerry in the 2004 presidential election. Elizabeth was a popular and sympathetic public figure because of the death of her son at age sixteen in a car accident, her courageous battle with breast cancer, and revelations of her husband’s ongoing affair during her health struggles.
Elizabeth Edwards published the book Saving Graces in 2006, two years after she was diagnosed with cancer and the same year her husband began his infamous affair with Rielle Hunter, which he did not publicly admit to until August of 2008. I am laying out the dates carefully because I found it a bit confusing as Edwards begins telling her story at the same place in her life that she ends this book. Also, because she was such a family-oriented person, I had to wonder at what point in her painful saga was she unknowingly being betrayed by her husband. There is no foreshadowing of the affair.
No spoiler alert is needed on this review. Edwards in this memoir is sharing very personal insights into the events of her life up through the close of her treatment for the cancer that was discovered in November of 2004. The facts along with all the rumors of the time are readily available on the Internet.
I must warn potential readers that the first half of this book is a very difficult read. Most of it deals with the very raw grief which Edwards and her family experienced upon the sudden and unexpected death of her sixteen year old son Wade in a car accident. Although the distance of time helps, when she wrote the book she was still experiencing deep sorrow over his absence. Although Elizabeth Edwards worked as a lawyer, author and speaker, the job that was most important to her was that of mother. She loved the presence of her children and their friends filling her home. She loved interacting with them. When Wade died she seemed to lose a part of herself, of her reason for living. I hope the writing of this book proved cathartic for her. Her grief is so real and so painful that I had to put it aside for a few days.
Upon returning to Saving Graces I was relieved to find a turn of focus away from the pain of Wade’s death and toward the future as Elizabeth and John Edwards decide to extend their family and continue to be deeply involved in political races. Even reading about her first battle with cancer was not as painful as the discussion of the aftermath of her son’s death. Though fearful of losing to breast cancer, Edwards knew it was something she could fight. Speaking of the diagnosis she said “...it wasn’t, by a sad and huge distance, the worst news we had ever heard. Wade’s death had spared us that...”
As the United States is currently pushing toward presidential elections, I found glimpsing the campaigns from behind the scenes to be an interesting endeavor. It made me like Elizabeth Edwards better and most of the rest of the political players and the process even less. That outcome was certainly not Edwards’ intention or attitude in writing, but I am too jaded to view the political process through her rose-colored glasses of “John (Edwards) just wants to help people” (not a direct quote, but a phrase that certainly reflects her thoughts). In my opinion, based on later evidence available after this book was written, John Edwards had one goal--to enrich himself. His desires were for money, power, sex, and the flattery of younger women. During the last half of the book, I kept wanting to yell across the pages to Elizabeth that she was living in a house of cards about to collapse on her. I wanted to warn her that her wonderful family man was going to cheat on her, destroying the family she adored so much. I wanted to shout out a danger signal--this man you thought you could count on is going to pay you the ultimate disrespect while you are on the campaign trail telling others how wonderful he is.
Saving Graces has a very appropriate subtitle: Finding Solace and Strength from Friends and Strangers. In the first half of the book, the solace and strength come from others who have lost children. In the second part, she shares the outpouring of love and concern she received when she publicly announced her battle with cancer.
Elizabeth Edwards wrote another book, Resilience: Reflections on the Burdens and Gifts of Facing Life’s Adversities, which continues her story including the return of cancer and the Hunter affair. Although Edwards is a good writer and I sympathize with the tremendous pain she endured physically, mentally, and emotionally, I just don’t know if I will choose to read her detailing of it in Resilience. It seems bad enough that she had to live it.
Elizabeth Edwards published the book Saving Graces in 2006, two years after she was diagnosed with cancer and the same year her husband began his infamous affair with Rielle Hunter, which he did not publicly admit to until August of 2008. I am laying out the dates carefully because I found it a bit confusing as Edwards begins telling her story at the same place in her life that she ends this book. Also, because she was such a family-oriented person, I had to wonder at what point in her painful saga was she unknowingly being betrayed by her husband. There is no foreshadowing of the affair.
No spoiler alert is needed on this review. Edwards in this memoir is sharing very personal insights into the events of her life up through the close of her treatment for the cancer that was discovered in November of 2004. The facts along with all the rumors of the time are readily available on the Internet.
I must warn potential readers that the first half of this book is a very difficult read. Most of it deals with the very raw grief which Edwards and her family experienced upon the sudden and unexpected death of her sixteen year old son Wade in a car accident. Although the distance of time helps, when she wrote the book she was still experiencing deep sorrow over his absence. Although Elizabeth Edwards worked as a lawyer, author and speaker, the job that was most important to her was that of mother. She loved the presence of her children and their friends filling her home. She loved interacting with them. When Wade died she seemed to lose a part of herself, of her reason for living. I hope the writing of this book proved cathartic for her. Her grief is so real and so painful that I had to put it aside for a few days.
Upon returning to Saving Graces I was relieved to find a turn of focus away from the pain of Wade’s death and toward the future as Elizabeth and John Edwards decide to extend their family and continue to be deeply involved in political races. Even reading about her first battle with cancer was not as painful as the discussion of the aftermath of her son’s death. Though fearful of losing to breast cancer, Edwards knew it was something she could fight. Speaking of the diagnosis she said “...it wasn’t, by a sad and huge distance, the worst news we had ever heard. Wade’s death had spared us that...”
As the United States is currently pushing toward presidential elections, I found glimpsing the campaigns from behind the scenes to be an interesting endeavor. It made me like Elizabeth Edwards better and most of the rest of the political players and the process even less. That outcome was certainly not Edwards’ intention or attitude in writing, but I am too jaded to view the political process through her rose-colored glasses of “John (Edwards) just wants to help people” (not a direct quote, but a phrase that certainly reflects her thoughts). In my opinion, based on later evidence available after this book was written, John Edwards had one goal--to enrich himself. His desires were for money, power, sex, and the flattery of younger women. During the last half of the book, I kept wanting to yell across the pages to Elizabeth that she was living in a house of cards about to collapse on her. I wanted to warn her that her wonderful family man was going to cheat on her, destroying the family she adored so much. I wanted to shout out a danger signal--this man you thought you could count on is going to pay you the ultimate disrespect while you are on the campaign trail telling others how wonderful he is.
Saving Graces has a very appropriate subtitle: Finding Solace and Strength from Friends and Strangers. In the first half of the book, the solace and strength come from others who have lost children. In the second part, she shares the outpouring of love and concern she received when she publicly announced her battle with cancer.
Elizabeth Edwards wrote another book, Resilience: Reflections on the Burdens and Gifts of Facing Life’s Adversities, which continues her story including the return of cancer and the Hunter affair. Although Edwards is a good writer and I sympathize with the tremendous pain she endured physically, mentally, and emotionally, I just don’t know if I will choose to read her detailing of it in Resilience. It seems bad enough that she had to live it.
November 5, 2007
I saw Elizabeth Edwards on I think Booknotes. It was an extended interview and she was talking about her book. What made me want to buy it was here quote regarding the loss of her son. "I have sometimes talked about the strange gift that comes with the awful tragedy of losing a child. I had already been through the worst, I believed; we all had, and I had the gift of knowing that nothing will ever be as bad as that." When she was diagnosed with breast cancer within days of the presidential election, she knew that as bad as that sounds she would have time to deal with it. This is the story of her life as the daughter of a career service man who lived all over the world to the wife of the vice-presidential candidate - with a little law school and career along with motherhood thrown in.
Their son Wade was killed instantly in a freak car accident his junior year of high school. One of her biggest fears is that he will be forgotten. The chapters on his death and their healing process were wrenching: their daughter sleeping in their room, setting up a computer lab in his name, visiting the cemetery, staying involved in the lives of his friends, deciding to have more children at 46 years of age. In the natural order of things, we will probably bury our parents, and we know that someday we will mourn a spouse or vice-versa. But no one expects to outlive their child. They had a sculpture made and placed at the high school. On it was inscribed what Wade wrote in Latin class at the end of his sophomore year: "The modern hero is a person who does something everyone thinks they could do if they were a little stronger, a little faster, a little smarter, or a little more generous. Heroes in ancient times were the link between man and perfect beings, gods. Heroes in modern times are the link between man as he is and man as he could me." This was a young man that was going to do something with his life. He had already won a national speech prize among his other accomplishments.
It was interesting to read about the campaigns and the election to the senate. Elizabeth was paired with Lynda Johnson Robb as her more experienced senate spouse. Lynda had lived around the capitol many years of her life, so she would take her places that others might not get to go and even when security would try to chase them away, she would say things like, "I just want to show her this historic desk." When the senate spouses were giving their annual luncheon for the first lady, they were going to have a workday to set it all up. Elizabeth showed up in overalls and tennis shoes ready to work. She didn't realize that a conference staff sets things up and this was another get together for the spouses and they were not dressed in overalls and tennis shoes.
I enjoyed this book a lot. She is only a few years older than me, so other than the fact that she lived all over the world and I lived in one state, the times were the same. I would think I would stop at the next chapter and then it was just too interesting, I didn't want to put the book down. I think this she is an extremely warm, kind and humble, down-to-earth woman.
Their son Wade was killed instantly in a freak car accident his junior year of high school. One of her biggest fears is that he will be forgotten. The chapters on his death and their healing process were wrenching: their daughter sleeping in their room, setting up a computer lab in his name, visiting the cemetery, staying involved in the lives of his friends, deciding to have more children at 46 years of age. In the natural order of things, we will probably bury our parents, and we know that someday we will mourn a spouse or vice-versa. But no one expects to outlive their child. They had a sculpture made and placed at the high school. On it was inscribed what Wade wrote in Latin class at the end of his sophomore year: "The modern hero is a person who does something everyone thinks they could do if they were a little stronger, a little faster, a little smarter, or a little more generous. Heroes in ancient times were the link between man and perfect beings, gods. Heroes in modern times are the link between man as he is and man as he could me." This was a young man that was going to do something with his life. He had already won a national speech prize among his other accomplishments.
It was interesting to read about the campaigns and the election to the senate. Elizabeth was paired with Lynda Johnson Robb as her more experienced senate spouse. Lynda had lived around the capitol many years of her life, so she would take her places that others might not get to go and even when security would try to chase them away, she would say things like, "I just want to show her this historic desk." When the senate spouses were giving their annual luncheon for the first lady, they were going to have a workday to set it all up. Elizabeth showed up in overalls and tennis shoes ready to work. She didn't realize that a conference staff sets things up and this was another get together for the spouses and they were not dressed in overalls and tennis shoes.
I enjoyed this book a lot. She is only a few years older than me, so other than the fact that she lived all over the world and I lived in one state, the times were the same. I would think I would stop at the next chapter and then it was just too interesting, I didn't want to put the book down. I think this she is an extremely warm, kind and humble, down-to-earth woman.
January 10, 2009
I heard Elizabeth Edwards on NPR talking about her book the day it came out and found a copy soon after. Now, in light of her husband's infidelity, it seems to ring less true, though it's not her fault. You've got to watch those pretty boys. They can fool you.
From the Publisher
During the 2004 presidential campaign, Elizabeth Edwards gained attention and admiration for her smart, likable, and down-to-earth personality. These qualities shine forth in Saving Graces, a memoir of the trials, triumphs, and tragedies Edwards experienced, and the various communities that celebrated her joys and lent her steady strength and quiet hope in darker times. Edwards writes about growing up in a military family, where she learned how to make friends easily in dozens of new schools and neighborhoods around the world, and came to appreciate the unstinting help and comfort naval families shared. Edwards's reminiscences of her years as a mother focus on the support she and other parents offered one another, from everyday favors to the ultimate test of her own community's strength-their compassionate response to the death of the Edwards' teenage son, Wade, in 1996. Her descriptions of her husband's campaigns for Senate, president, and vice president offer a fascinating perspective on the groups, the great and small, that sustain our democracy. Her fight with breast cancer, which stirred an outpouring of support from women across the country, has once again affirmed Edwards's belief in the power of community to make our lives better and richer. Inspiring and wonderfully readable, Saving Graces will resonate with readers of such recent bestselling memoirs as Lance Armstrong's It's Not About the Bike and Joan Didion's The Year of Magical Thinking.
From the Publisher
During the 2004 presidential campaign, Elizabeth Edwards gained attention and admiration for her smart, likable, and down-to-earth personality. These qualities shine forth in Saving Graces, a memoir of the trials, triumphs, and tragedies Edwards experienced, and the various communities that celebrated her joys and lent her steady strength and quiet hope in darker times. Edwards writes about growing up in a military family, where she learned how to make friends easily in dozens of new schools and neighborhoods around the world, and came to appreciate the unstinting help and comfort naval families shared. Edwards's reminiscences of her years as a mother focus on the support she and other parents offered one another, from everyday favors to the ultimate test of her own community's strength-their compassionate response to the death of the Edwards' teenage son, Wade, in 1996. Her descriptions of her husband's campaigns for Senate, president, and vice president offer a fascinating perspective on the groups, the great and small, that sustain our democracy. Her fight with breast cancer, which stirred an outpouring of support from women across the country, has once again affirmed Edwards's belief in the power of community to make our lives better and richer. Inspiring and wonderfully readable, Saving Graces will resonate with readers of such recent bestselling memoirs as Lance Armstrong's It's Not About the Bike and Joan Didion's The Year of Magical Thinking.
May 10, 2011
To say that I was moved by this autobiography is a huge understatement; I even cried on the airplane while I was reading it. Just like you know that the Titantic will eventually sink when you watch the movie, you know that she eventually dies of cancer (and you might already know before reading the book that they had a teenage son die in a car accident in the 1990's) and that her husband cheated on her (which is NOT mentioned in the book...it was published in 2006, so it might have preceeded her/the public finding out about that, or she decided to not air such topics in this book). That absolutely does not make this book less worthwhile to read. She was born a "military brat" and lived in Japan (repeatedly) in the post-WWII/post-bombing 1950's, she went to law school and was a practicing attorney for several years (read: not a politician's trophy wife), she campaigned as vigorously as her husband (even when she found out she had cancer)...this woman is an amazing role model and an emotional pillar of strength.
A fair amount of the book deals with her discussing her son's death, and how it affected her life (and her family). Those that have not experienced the death of an immediate family member (spouse/parent/sibling/child) might struggle with this section, because she is expressing how she truly felt, and it's very raw emotion. You need to possess some level of emotional maturity to be able to stomach reading that, because it will break your heart. But, on the other hand, the fact that she was able to get through that period, support her husband's political career, be open to having more children, and fight cancer with a vengence illustrates her will to keep on living and to not spend every day of the rest of her life sitting at her son's gravesite at the cementary.
A fair amount of the book deals with her discussing her son's death, and how it affected her life (and her family). Those that have not experienced the death of an immediate family member (spouse/parent/sibling/child) might struggle with this section, because she is expressing how she truly felt, and it's very raw emotion. You need to possess some level of emotional maturity to be able to stomach reading that, because it will break your heart. But, on the other hand, the fact that she was able to get through that period, support her husband's political career, be open to having more children, and fight cancer with a vengence illustrates her will to keep on living and to not spend every day of the rest of her life sitting at her son's gravesite at the cementary.
December 25, 2013
A year or so ago, I read Resilience, the second book by Elizabeth Edwards, written during the sex scandal that ended her husband's political career (at least for a while -- they seem to be making a comeback or trying to post-sex-scandal these days). By the time I finished that book I was more enamored of Elizabeth Edwards than ever but still able to find some equilibrium and forgiveness for John as she seemed to have done.Then I read this book, with the little add-on chapter written about the time she got her diagnosis the second time and he elected to continue his presidential campaign -- likely at the same time as he was meeting the young hussy who he threw his marriage away for. This book covers Elizabeth's whole life up to that point, including the heartbreak of her son's senseless death, the decision to have more children late in life, and the first two presidential campaigns. She talks about all of the people whose love and kindness made a difference in her life and the importance of connection. She demonstrated an embodiment of her husband's political platform that things should be better for everyone and that there should not be Two Americas, one for rich and one for poor. And she praised the never-ending support of her husband and the solidity of her marriage that sustained her through unbelievably heart-breaking moments. And I became so angry with John Edwards that I could hardly see! The enormity of what he squandered for a few brief moments of illicit pleasure and the ego boost of that young woman wanting him is mind-boggling. And the resilience of Elizabeth Edwards is even more remarkable. She should have been the one to run for office.
April 12, 2009
June’s book club selection. While Edwards’ story was interesting – life with a military father, college, grad school, law school, marriage, children, death of a child, politics, more children, breast cancer – I was a bit disappointed in the writing. This is often my experience with autobiographies. Perhaps it is because the person may not be a trained writer or it may be more difficult to tell one’s own story in a cohesive way. “…I have sometimes talked about the strange gift that comes with the awful tragedy of losing a child. I had already been through the worst, I believed; we all had, and I had the gift of knowing that nothing will ever be as bad as that. The worst day of my life had already come.” I thought about Eileen Z. when I read parts of this book (about Wade) and I thought about the recently deceased, Jeannine Mongelli when I read some of the parts about breast cancer. I liked how Elizabeth got so much comfort from friends and strangers. One correspondent wrote to her that “Perhaps one’s heart cannot really open until it breaks.” Although somewhat disappointed, I got a lot from this book.
October 7, 2010
I saw Elizabeth Edwards interviewed on Oprah some time ago and I was interested in reading her book. I was interested in the personal aspects of Elizabeth's story. Being Australian I didn't know her (or her husband) from the Presidential campaign.
I really enjoyed the book. I liked Elizabeth's conversational style of writing. I cried over the loss of her son and the impact on her family. I was fascinated by her desciption of Usenet and the grief support group she joined (Usenet newsgroups being one of my early Internet experiences!). I was interested in her decision to have more children and her refusal to speak about her useof IVF in the media so as to not give false hope to women. The political stories were interesting, but most of all I was interested in her stories about connecting with people, particularly through her cancer.
This book was published in 2006 and a lot has happened since then. I knew that John Edwards had been in the news recently and googled the family after I finished the book. How unfortunate it has all become!
But, this tale reflects Elizabeth's life up to a moment in time. I found it very interesting.
I really enjoyed the book. I liked Elizabeth's conversational style of writing. I cried over the loss of her son and the impact on her family. I was fascinated by her desciption of Usenet and the grief support group she joined (Usenet newsgroups being one of my early Internet experiences!). I was interested in her decision to have more children and her refusal to speak about her useof IVF in the media so as to not give false hope to women. The political stories were interesting, but most of all I was interested in her stories about connecting with people, particularly through her cancer.
This book was published in 2006 and a lot has happened since then. I knew that John Edwards had been in the news recently and googled the family after I finished the book. How unfortunate it has all become!
But, this tale reflects Elizabeth's life up to a moment in time. I found it very interesting.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 1, 2013
Prior to reading this book I had great respect for Elizabeth Edwards. As I read, that only increased. I was very impressed with not only her writing, but also her character. As she wrote of the loss of her son, her family's early days in politics, her time on the campaign trail with her husband, and her early struggle with breast cancer, I was drawn to her honesty, her down-to-earth nature, and her humanizing flaws. Of course, time has added perspective on the events she discussed as well, and I couldn't help think (particularly throughout the passages where she told of her devoted husband) of those things that came to light after this was published (with her husband and her cancer). Her writing draws you in and it feels almost as if she was just sharing her story with a friend. It was painful when it was supposed to be painful, hopeful when (had I been in her position) I would have found it beyond difficult to find hope, and honest and humble. I'm interested in reading her other works.
March 18, 2008
This isn't a book I would normally have picked up. Elizabeth Edwards spoke at our 2007 Annual Meeting and I had my book signed so I figured I should read it.
I was surprised by how much I enjoyed the book. None of the topics were terribly interesting to me, but her writing was engaging enough to keep me going. I guess I did enjoy her chapters on growing up a military brat, they were stories and observations that I could relate to.
Edwards is obviously an extremely strong woman, and her upbeat attitude and honesty are impressive. I really appreciate that she openly admits to being sad or hopeless at times. This edition of the book has a new chapter at the end - her determination to keep going despite her poor prognosis is pretty awe-inspiring.
I'm not sure that I would recommend this book to many of my friends, but I am sending a copy (also signed) to my step-mother and I think she will really love it.
I was surprised by how much I enjoyed the book. None of the topics were terribly interesting to me, but her writing was engaging enough to keep me going. I guess I did enjoy her chapters on growing up a military brat, they were stories and observations that I could relate to.
Edwards is obviously an extremely strong woman, and her upbeat attitude and honesty are impressive. I really appreciate that she openly admits to being sad or hopeless at times. This edition of the book has a new chapter at the end - her determination to keep going despite her poor prognosis is pretty awe-inspiring.
I'm not sure that I would recommend this book to many of my friends, but I am sending a copy (also signed) to my step-mother and I think she will really love it.
January 10, 2008
My husband gave me this book because I had been impressed with Elizabeth Edwards - he rarely gives me books so I made a point of reading it. I like memoirs and autobiographyy and I enjoyed her account of growing up in a military family. The story of her grief over her son's death is compelling and terrifying for a parent or grandparent - I would never want to have this experience. However, the more I read the more I was annoyed at her wealth and the luxury she had of being able to spend all her time grieving - hours each day at the cemetery AND hours in an online grief group. I do not doubt her sincerity but felt us average working joes with families would not have this choice. I too lost a child - although in my case it was a child born dead after 8 months of pregnancy - and perhaps I was envious of her chance to immerse herself in grief. I found the campaign stuff rather boring and just skimmed it. Hard to believe anyone has that many close friends!
September 23, 2007
Whatever your political leanings are, there is no denying the strength of Elizabeth Edwards, wife of democratic presidential candidate John Edwards. Her book retells much of her interesting life (including her experiences growng up as a military brat), but concentrates on some of her most trying moments, including losing her teenage son (and a piece of herself) in a car accident and being diagnosed with breast cancer on the eve of her husband's loss in the 2004 elections. She gets a little preachy and self-congratulatory at times, but I found most of the book inspiring and thought-provoking. The book's main mesage is about how the people around you have an incredible power to lift you up at your lowest moments. I'm still not sure what I think of her husband as a presidential candidant, but I would be very interested to see what Elizabeth Edwards would do as the first lady.
November 21, 2011
I read this book two years ago trying to find some insight into why Elizabeth Edwards would have gone along with John Edwards' charade to run for president again in 2008, knowing he had had an extramarital affair. Well, I didn't get much insight into that issue, but the book was an interesting read anyway. I enjoyed reading about her growing up on US military bases in Japan. There was a huge section on dealing with the overpowering grief from her son's death. Edwards' description of the 2004 campaign when John Edwards ran for vice president, made it sound like there really were no issues in their marriage or family. The final section of the book was devoted to her battle with breast cancer and the people who helped her through it. It was an interesting read and I hope to read her followup book soon. She was an intelligent, excellent writer.
February 11, 2010
This was my favorite of the three autobiographies I had recently read. Mrs. Edwards has a nice narrative style. And boy, has she been through a lot, and that was only through the early treatment for her cancer. Some of the lists of names of supporters and lengthy quotes of correspondence between her and other grieving parents grew somewhat tedious, however, and I found it unfair that it wasn't until the last chapter that she mentioned her daughter Cate's birth - somehow Cate just appeared in the family history although the other 3 children's arrivals were detailed and celebrated. After reading this it breaks my heart all the more what a philanderer and liar John turned out to be. How devastating for his family.
December 26, 2023
This bio has many themes. The first is the most powerful one. Edwards tells the story of how she got through cancer. It's at the end of the book. It's clear that she knew how to get through things. Her husband was in politics.
The book is also about what it means to be the wife of the of the man running for Vice-President. He was a Senator. That work--no matter how hard you think of it -- can be interesting. And it shows that there could be romance.
The best part of the book is the last third. It's the piece about with breast cancer. It hit when her husband was running in politics. There are seven pages of the people gave her support when the problem came up.
The book is also about what it means to be the wife of the of the man running for Vice-President. He was a Senator. That work--no matter how hard you think of it -- can be interesting. And it shows that there could be romance.
The best part of the book is the last third. It's the piece about with breast cancer. It hit when her husband was running in politics. There are seven pages of the people gave her support when the problem came up.
July 30, 2009
I think Elizabeth Edwards is a lovely writer, and I related to the way she thinks about the world and the value of community and connections. The driving force of her life is the loss of her 16-year-old son and the book deals with her grief, how she coped with it and channeled it into various campaigning. It actually might be a good book to recommend to someone who has lost a child, but it might be tricky to do so given the author's perceived political nature (to me she writes more as a mother than a politician) and then the John Edward's scandal (which came out after this book was written).
January 23, 2011
This is a book divided into four unequal parts: Elizabeth Edwards' childhood as a military brat, the 2004 Presidential election, her (first) battle with breast cancer and the death of her son, Wade.
I think it's safe to say that Wade's death was the defining moment of Elizabeth's life. She writes with depth and intensity of the days and weeks after Wade's death with such openness that I felt I was grieving alongside her. Those chapters were some of the most honest, most painful writing I've ever read.
Elizabeth Edwards lived in the same city that I do. Reading her book made me wish I had found some way to get to meet her. She seems to have been a most remarkable person.
I think it's safe to say that Wade's death was the defining moment of Elizabeth's life. She writes with depth and intensity of the days and weeks after Wade's death with such openness that I felt I was grieving alongside her. Those chapters were some of the most honest, most painful writing I've ever read.
Elizabeth Edwards lived in the same city that I do. Reading her book made me wish I had found some way to get to meet her. She seems to have been a most remarkable person.
July 28, 2011
I've always liked the author's husband, John Edwards, as a political candidate and so was eager to read this book by a member of his family. It didn't discuss, however, John as much as the death of their teenage son Wade and Elizabeth's battle with cancer. In dealing with those two topics, there were times when I thought "Enough!", but then her apparent reason for writing the book was to express her appreciation for the support she received during those traumas, from both friends and strangers. This memoir came to my reading list from its appearance on the New York Times best seller list in October 2006.
April 7, 2013
To be honest I only read this book to find Elizabeth Edwards' response to Andrew Young's book "The Politician". Ms. Edwards discussed many painful things in this book, especially the death of her son Wade in great detail, but not once did she discuss her husband's infidelity. The book was written as though that period of her life never happened.
It was interesting to see her perspective of life on the campaign trail. I didn't realize that she played a large role the campaign. Seeing that she was a wife that had to be groomed was an aspect of First Lady hopefuls that we don't usually see.
Not a bad read...
It was interesting to see her perspective of life on the campaign trail. I didn't realize that she played a large role the campaign. Seeing that she was a wife that had to be groomed was an aspect of First Lady hopefuls that we don't usually see.
Not a bad read...
October 9, 2013
I absolutely loved this book. It is a true revelation of Elizabeth Edwards' character and life. It is essentially a "thank you" to all the people involved in her life who made her the person she came to be. She truly appeciated the concept of all success in life as being derived by "a village", in which she was as much a contributor as a receiver.
I especially enjoyed all her references to military life; as a former "military brat" I could really relate!
Her writing is so clear and coherent, full of perhaps too many details for the average reader. However, as a contribution to her legacy, I am glad she felt comfortable including those details.
I found great inspiration in this book.
I especially enjoyed all her references to military life; as a former "military brat" I could really relate!
Her writing is so clear and coherent, full of perhaps too many details for the average reader. However, as a contribution to her legacy, I am glad she felt comfortable including those details.
I found great inspiration in this book.
October 22, 2007
I found this books by Elizabeth Edwards to be a touching memoir. She is brutally honest about the terrible grief she and her family experienced when their son was killed in an auto accident. She also writes of her breast cancer, which she found just as the 2004 presidential race was ending and which has recently found has spread. Her determination to support her husband in spite of her illness is obvious after reading of how she has handled other things in her life. Her stories of her childhood as the daughter of a career Air Force pilot were fascinating. She is a remarkable woman.
January 20, 2008
I adore Elizabeth Edwards. I think she is an inspiration and I wish she were running for president instead of her husband. I find great comfort when I hear her speak; she is amazing. However, her book really is not. There were sections that were very good, primarily the parts where she talks about dealing with cancer. But most of the rest of the book was really boring. And the parts that weren't boring were extremely depressing. I had so been looking forward to reading it and wish I had liked it more.
January 29, 2008
Elizabeth Edwards recounts how she coped with the sudden death of her son Wade and then her cancer diagnoses about ten years later. She thanks her firends and family, including her extended ones on alt.support.grief and griefnet, who listened to her and allowed her to grieve on her own time. She grew up the child of a Navy pilot and lived all over the country, as well as Japan, and credits part of her coping with being able to immediately assimilate into new situations and easily make friends. I admire her and wish her well with her fight angainst ehr incurable cancer.
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