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Composing a Further Life: The Age of Active Wisdom
Mary Catherine Bateson sees aging today as an "improvisational art form calling for imagination and willingness to learn," and in this ardent, affirming study, she relates the experiences of men and women—herself included—who, upon entering this second adulthood, have found new meaning and new ways to contribute, composing their lives in new patterns.
Among the people Bateson engages in open-ended, in-depth conversations are a retired Maine boatyard worker who has become a silversmith and maker of fine jewelry; an African American woman who explores the importance of grandmothering; two gay men finding contentment in mutual caring; the retired dean of a cathedral in New York City who exemplifies how a multiplicity of interests and connections lead to deeper unity; and Jane Fonda, who shares her ways of dealing with change and spiritual growth.
Here is a book that presents each of us—at any age—with an exhilarating challenge to think about and approach our later lives with the full force of imagination, curiosity, and enthusiasm. At the same time, it speaks to us as members of a larger society concerned about the world that our children and grandchildren, born and not yet born, will inherit. "We live longer," she says, "but we think shorter." As adults find themselves entering Adulthood II, making the choices that will affirm and complete the meaning of the lives they have lived, they can play a key role, contributing their perspectives and their experience of adapting to change. In our day, wisdom is no longer associated with withdrawal and passivity but with engagement with others and the contribution that Bateson calls "active wisdom."
Among the people Bateson engages in open-ended, in-depth conversations are a retired Maine boatyard worker who has become a silversmith and maker of fine jewelry; an African American woman who explores the importance of grandmothering; two gay men finding contentment in mutual caring; the retired dean of a cathedral in New York City who exemplifies how a multiplicity of interests and connections lead to deeper unity; and Jane Fonda, who shares her ways of dealing with change and spiritual growth.
Here is a book that presents each of us—at any age—with an exhilarating challenge to think about and approach our later lives with the full force of imagination, curiosity, and enthusiasm. At the same time, it speaks to us as members of a larger society concerned about the world that our children and grandchildren, born and not yet born, will inherit. "We live longer," she says, "but we think shorter." As adults find themselves entering Adulthood II, making the choices that will affirm and complete the meaning of the lives they have lived, they can play a key role, contributing their perspectives and their experience of adapting to change. In our day, wisdom is no longer associated with withdrawal and passivity but with engagement with others and the contribution that Bateson calls "active wisdom."
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First published January 1, 2010
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About the author
Mary Catherine Bateson
42 books62 followersMary Catherine Bateson (born December 8, 1939) is an American writer and cultural anthropologist.
A graduate of the Brearley School, Bateson is the daughter of Margaret Mead and Gregory Bateson.
Bateson is a noted author in her field with many published monographs. Among Bateson's books is With a Daughter's Eye: A Memoir of Margaret Mead and Gregory Bateson, a recounting of her upbringing by two famous parents. She has taught at Harvard, Amherst, and George Mason University, among others.
Mary Catherine Bateson is a fellow of the International Leadership Forum and was president of the Institute for Intercultural Studies in New York until 2010.
(from Wikipedia)
A graduate of the Brearley School, Bateson is the daughter of Margaret Mead and Gregory Bateson.
Bateson is a noted author in her field with many published monographs. Among Bateson's books is With a Daughter's Eye: A Memoir of Margaret Mead and Gregory Bateson, a recounting of her upbringing by two famous parents. She has taught at Harvard, Amherst, and George Mason University, among others.
Mary Catherine Bateson is a fellow of the International Leadership Forum and was president of the Institute for Intercultural Studies in New York until 2010.
(from Wikipedia)
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 54 reviews
September 28, 2016
Oh, it's a long, long while
From May to December
But the days grow short,
When you reach September. *
It's getting time for me to face the fact that if it's not September for me yet, it will be soon. I am inarguably closer to grave than cradle. Luckily, I have some good role models - older women who are living rich, vibrant lives in the autumn of their years. There's Carol, in her late seventies, who travels to Machu Picchu, and to Africa to see gorillas, and Jill, who has just turned 81. After spending decades involved in dog obedience trials, she recently quit the sport, not because she was too old, but because her dog was.
Bateson's book also offers up many people who inspire others by remaining vital and involved into their later years. Chapters focus on various individuals and the stories they share about their lives.
Older adults are healthy and active decades longer than they would have been in the past, reflecting on their lives in the effort to understand who they are in a newly emerging stage of life and discovering the wisdom they have to offer. Composing a further life involves thinking about the entire process of composing a life and the way in which early experience connects to later. It involves looking through new eyes at what has been lived so far and making choices that show the whole process in a new light and that offer a sense of completion and fulfillment.
She advises us to look at the later years as a second stage of adulthood, not an extension tacked on to old age, and cautions everyone to ask themselves the following question: "How can this time of my life complete or balance what came before?"
I'm guessing that, like me, your enjoyment of the book will depend upon your interest in each particular person being interviewed or topic being discussed.
When the autumn weather
Turn leaves to flame
One hasn't got time
For the waiting game. *
I don't really have a bucket list, though there are a few things I'd like to do yet: learn some new skills, and visit some Goodreads friends. It recently occurred to me . . . when am I going to do this stuff? In my sixties? In my eighties? This book has helped a bit in spurring me on toward my goals, and attempting to attain them . . . before I reach December.
It is often only in the final pages that a story reveals its meaning . . .
*SEPTEMBER SONG
From the Broadway Show "Knickerbocker Holiday" (1938)
(Music: Kurt Weill / Lyrics: Maxwell Anderson)
From May to December
But the days grow short,
When you reach September. *
It's getting time for me to face the fact that if it's not September for me yet, it will be soon. I am inarguably closer to grave than cradle. Luckily, I have some good role models - older women who are living rich, vibrant lives in the autumn of their years. There's Carol, in her late seventies, who travels to Machu Picchu, and to Africa to see gorillas, and Jill, who has just turned 81. After spending decades involved in dog obedience trials, she recently quit the sport, not because she was too old, but because her dog was.
Bateson's book also offers up many people who inspire others by remaining vital and involved into their later years. Chapters focus on various individuals and the stories they share about their lives.
Older adults are healthy and active decades longer than they would have been in the past, reflecting on their lives in the effort to understand who they are in a newly emerging stage of life and discovering the wisdom they have to offer. Composing a further life involves thinking about the entire process of composing a life and the way in which early experience connects to later. It involves looking through new eyes at what has been lived so far and making choices that show the whole process in a new light and that offer a sense of completion and fulfillment.
She advises us to look at the later years as a second stage of adulthood, not an extension tacked on to old age, and cautions everyone to ask themselves the following question: "How can this time of my life complete or balance what came before?"
I'm guessing that, like me, your enjoyment of the book will depend upon your interest in each particular person being interviewed or topic being discussed.
When the autumn weather
Turn leaves to flame
One hasn't got time
For the waiting game. *
I don't really have a bucket list, though there are a few things I'd like to do yet: learn some new skills, and visit some Goodreads friends. It recently occurred to me . . . when am I going to do this stuff? In my sixties? In my eighties? This book has helped a bit in spurring me on toward my goals, and attempting to attain them . . . before I reach December.
It is often only in the final pages that a story reveals its meaning . . .
*SEPTEMBER SONG
From the Broadway Show "Knickerbocker Holiday" (1938)
(Music: Kurt Weill / Lyrics: Maxwell Anderson)
March 1, 2011
The human lifespan has increased, on average, by 30 years since the beginning of the 20th century and by 20 years since the end of World War II. In light of this extension of our stay on Earth, Bateson revises Erik Erikson’s developmental stages schema to add a new stage, Adulthood II, which occurs roughly between the ages of 50 and 75. This unprecedented lengthy period marks the time when people are no longer raising children or establishing their careers, but are still physically healthy and can strive to cultivate and utilize “active wisdom”.
Bateson, who once served as a teaching assistant to Erikson at Harvard, promotes the idea that older adults should not be concerned primarily with protecting their own monetary benefits (as politicians assume they are) but instead can strive to leave a positive impact on the world. One way that Bateson and some high-powered friends attempted to promote this was through the Granny Voter project that they established in 2004, which urged elders to vote with their grandchildren’s well being, as opposed to their own narrow interests, in mind. Through interviews and commentary, Bateson describes a variety of ways in which her friends and acquaintances have found personal meaning and /or have given something to society during this life stage.
Bateson emphasizes that the addition of 30 years to the lifespan isn’t simply an extra add-on. Rather, a person’s life may be transformed in ways that alter how the person views his/her life prior to that point. During Adulthood II, some people step away from what they have done before to try something new and different; others focus on the most pleasurable or satisfying aspect of what they have already been doing, casting off less rewarding duties or responsibilities so that the person no longer complains that “I love my work but hate my job”. Whatever changes occur, if we look carefully, we will likely find that something that was already part of a person’s earlier life—a love of nature, a concern for justice, or an interest in fabricating objects--has reappeared—perhaps in altered form and, in some instances, put to more mature purposes.
Bateson’s interviewees—her friends and their friends--include high-powered individuals who have accomplished a great deal in their lives. At times I wondered if their experiences really provide a template for the lives of ordinary folks like you and me! In addition, Bateson indulges occasionally in a bit of rambling. Still, this book offers a mind-stretching view of a newly-emerging stage of the life-span.
February 12, 2012
This is quite a wonderful book, especially for people at midlife and beyond. In our seventies, my husband and I are making a study of how to make years of inevitable physical decline nonetheless rewarding, creative, and productive. This book has good examples in the stories she tells of real people, and in Bateson's many facts and insights. Very readable.
December 30, 2011
I finished "Composing a Further Life" on my 56 birthday. Mary Catherine's thoughts and ideas were expressed in a way that encouraged exploration of multiple possibilities. Life is ambiguous, learning is incremental, and love hope and joy are precious. Mary Catherine shared the stories of people who lived full lives and who now embraced the future with curiosity and mindfulness.
July 31, 2022
This book makes a point that strikes my middle-aged and middle class self as very salient. Mary Catherine Bateson takes her cue from the observation that life expectancy has risen dramatically over the last century. Globally the average has passed the 70 years barrier. The population of many of the richest countries in the world have life expectancies of over 80 years. However, these extra years have not merely been tagged on to the life course. As a result something qualitatively has changed in the way we experience adulthood. One could say that a traditional tripartite structure of the life course - childhood, productive adulthood, old age - has now expanded with a fourth interval. Bateson labels it as 'adulthood II' or 'the age of active wisdom'. It follows upon a stretch devoted to key commitments (life partner, children, career) and typically starts in the 55-65 age bracket. Life events such as retirement, the confrontation with empty nest syndrome, or the passing away of loved ones may trigger a reactive transition into adulthood II. The point made by Bateson is that we don't have to wait for a crisis or an externally imposed change but would do well to proactively mould this new phase in life in a way that does justice to our earlier life experiences and opens up new areas for a meaningful contribution to a larger social context. The point seems evident yet there seems to be not a single institution out there that has as its mission to support people in their transition from adulthood I to adulthood II. Those who are faced with knotty questions in this phase in life may burn or bore out, or they may end up on a couch in a shrink's cabinet. Which casts a shadow of guilt and failure on this most natural and even welcome passage in life.
As in her earlier book "Composing a Life", Mary Catherine Bateson explores these themes through the prism of the lives of people in her own social network. A large part of the book is devoted to quasi-verbatim transcriptions of conversations with friends. The range of interlocutors is not representative of Western (American) society, however. Those discussed in the book are for the most part outwardly successful individuals - in contrast to the earlier volume, both men and women. Star actress Jane Fonda is one of those who gets airtime. One wonders how people in precarious socio-economic conditions deal with the predicament of transition to adulthood II.
This is not a self-help book that offers a clear-cut set of recipes to grow into active wisdom. What is offered here is a set biographical patterns that we may or may not recognise as salient to our own lives. Wisdom is not something one has, but rather the skillfulness to engage in a process of improvisation rooted in an ability to listen, both internally and interpersonally, and to learn. This book aims to spark that receptivity and that quality of attention in the reader. This ambition is mirrored by the author's writing style which is informal and very fluent. One could argue that the number of pages in this book could have easily been reduced with a third without affecting the general line of argument. But the text as it is, with its meandering and expansive quality, is intended to activate our feelings of empathy for Bateson's spokespeople. (However, I appreciate from other GR-members' comments that this editorial strategy may have the opposite effect).
For me this has been a valuable read because it helps me to articulate more clearly the impulse behind the personal process of transition I have been engaged over these last three of four years. I didn't find any radically new or suddenly transformative messages in this book. But I feel heartened by Mary Catherine's skillful meta-patterning of life experiences around the age of active wisdom.
As in her earlier book "Composing a Life", Mary Catherine Bateson explores these themes through the prism of the lives of people in her own social network. A large part of the book is devoted to quasi-verbatim transcriptions of conversations with friends. The range of interlocutors is not representative of Western (American) society, however. Those discussed in the book are for the most part outwardly successful individuals - in contrast to the earlier volume, both men and women. Star actress Jane Fonda is one of those who gets airtime. One wonders how people in precarious socio-economic conditions deal with the predicament of transition to adulthood II.
This is not a self-help book that offers a clear-cut set of recipes to grow into active wisdom. What is offered here is a set biographical patterns that we may or may not recognise as salient to our own lives. Wisdom is not something one has, but rather the skillfulness to engage in a process of improvisation rooted in an ability to listen, both internally and interpersonally, and to learn. This book aims to spark that receptivity and that quality of attention in the reader. This ambition is mirrored by the author's writing style which is informal and very fluent. One could argue that the number of pages in this book could have easily been reduced with a third without affecting the general line of argument. But the text as it is, with its meandering and expansive quality, is intended to activate our feelings of empathy for Bateson's spokespeople. (However, I appreciate from other GR-members' comments that this editorial strategy may have the opposite effect).
For me this has been a valuable read because it helps me to articulate more clearly the impulse behind the personal process of transition I have been engaged over these last three of four years. I didn't find any radically new or suddenly transformative messages in this book. But I feel heartened by Mary Catherine's skillful meta-patterning of life experiences around the age of active wisdom.
January 25, 2021
This book hovered between 2 and 3 stars for me. I first heard of Mary Catherine Bateson while listening to an interview she did on "On Being." She is (to her annoyance I'm sure) usually introduced as 'the daughter of Margaret Mead and Gregory Bateson.' I found her insightful, intelligent, and introspective. Reading this book, I found her to be all these things as well. I had intended to read her earlier book "Composing a Life" first, but my reading plans are often at the whim of FedEx and this one arrived first. This book starts with the premise that we - as a species - live much longer and much 'better' (healthier) than we used to. This creates a new phase of life: Adulthood II. Usually post-retirement, this gives healthy older adults sometimes up to 30 years of a 'new life' - a period of reinvention and re-engagement, a chance to look back on the past and decide what is worth keeping, and what is worth changing.
In theory all this is true. Bateson, however, is focusing on a very specific class of people - "NPR types" as I would call them - well-off, educated, with the leisure, time, and resources to really dive into this new phase of Adulthood II. Most Americans don't have this luxury and in fact spend much of this 'gifted' time in ill-health or worrying about the bills. The fact that these are her contemporaries isn't a problem, it simply should be acknowledged especially since Bateson has a habit of speaking quite universally about unique situations.
Much of the chapters are essentially features of different individuals in this phase of life. Nearly all of them I found to be more or less insufferable. It's hard for me to be completely objective simply because I disagree so much with Bateson in the areas of politics and religion (she is also Catholic, though of a very different sort). Through these interviews she promulgates a worldview that is almost entirely self and action oriented. Ironic since I know for a fact this is the opposite of what she wanted to advocate for: she spends plenty of time writing about the importance of just 'being' but then ends up devoting most of the book to lauding her associates and contemporaries for their 'good works.'
I respect Bateson as a clearly intelligent and thoughtful woman who sought to be an active participant in her own life. Yet - I found the book disorganized, repetitive, and ultimately, it simply didn't work. Perhaps I'll need to revisit when I reach "adulthood II" myself (Bateson may gently tell me my 29 years simply can't quite relate to this phase of life yet). We'll see. I'm looking forward to the first installment - "Composing a Life" - more geared toward my own season of life. Bateson died in early 2021. I do hope she found the peace she was looking for.
In theory all this is true. Bateson, however, is focusing on a very specific class of people - "NPR types" as I would call them - well-off, educated, with the leisure, time, and resources to really dive into this new phase of Adulthood II. Most Americans don't have this luxury and in fact spend much of this 'gifted' time in ill-health or worrying about the bills. The fact that these are her contemporaries isn't a problem, it simply should be acknowledged especially since Bateson has a habit of speaking quite universally about unique situations.
Much of the chapters are essentially features of different individuals in this phase of life. Nearly all of them I found to be more or less insufferable. It's hard for me to be completely objective simply because I disagree so much with Bateson in the areas of politics and religion (she is also Catholic, though of a very different sort). Through these interviews she promulgates a worldview that is almost entirely self and action oriented. Ironic since I know for a fact this is the opposite of what she wanted to advocate for: she spends plenty of time writing about the importance of just 'being' but then ends up devoting most of the book to lauding her associates and contemporaries for their 'good works.'
I respect Bateson as a clearly intelligent and thoughtful woman who sought to be an active participant in her own life. Yet - I found the book disorganized, repetitive, and ultimately, it simply didn't work. Perhaps I'll need to revisit when I reach "adulthood II" myself (Bateson may gently tell me my 29 years simply can't quite relate to this phase of life yet). We'll see. I'm looking forward to the first installment - "Composing a Life" - more geared toward my own season of life. Bateson died in early 2021. I do hope she found the peace she was looking for.
January 7, 2014
Having read, remembered, and recommended Composing a Life many years ago, I was eager to read Composing a Further life. I had no idea how deeply this book would affect my thinking about the next phase of my life as I contemplate retirement in 6 months. Like Composing a Life, this book is a thematic analysis - not a rigid one, but a fluid and flexible drawing out of possible lessons - of a series of interviews with fascinating people from diverse walks of life. Unlike the former book, this one includes people from working class backgrounds (although academics like Bateson still predominate), a gay couple, and people between 60-80 who have made different choices through their Adulthood 2 phase - what Bateson calls the Age of Active Wisdom. "It may be that the word wisdom refers not so much to what one knows but to a quality of listening, both internal and interpersonal. In other words, the willingness to learn and modify earlier learning is itself a component of wisdom, and the word refers to a process rather than a possession. What then would active wisdom mean? The ability and willingness to contribute to society by putting a lifetime pattern of experience and reflection to work - often, above all, by listening" (p. 243).
Through her own wise listening, Bateson draws out the stories and musings of those she interviewed and includes her own experiences and perceptions to address issues related to embarking on new vocations and avocations, spirituality, relationships, grand-parenting, and other areas that are of great interest to me at this point in my life. What struck me the most is her thesis that we draw on past experiences and strengths (and sometimes, failures we have learned from) to compose/create new ventures, to return to paths we had to turn away from earlier because of career or family demands, to find a new way to be of use. That feels so much more positive - actually exciting - than seeing retirement as an end of a career.
Through her own wise listening, Bateson draws out the stories and musings of those she interviewed and includes her own experiences and perceptions to address issues related to embarking on new vocations and avocations, spirituality, relationships, grand-parenting, and other areas that are of great interest to me at this point in my life. What struck me the most is her thesis that we draw on past experiences and strengths (and sometimes, failures we have learned from) to compose/create new ventures, to return to paths we had to turn away from earlier because of career or family demands, to find a new way to be of use. That feels so much more positive - actually exciting - than seeing retirement as an end of a career.
October 20, 2010
As you can imagine if you know where I work, I am occasionally in situations where I'm supposed to "read" books about aging. And most of the time, I "read" them. But this is the first book I read for work that I was compelled to finish extracurricularly, on a slow-moving train to and from Richmond, no less. Bateson, who is an inexpressibly lovely person (I can say this because we hugged once), made me rethink my own personal concept of independence in this book. The following quote -- which is about the fact that people of our generation are probably going to live a good 20 years longer, on average, than the generation prior to ours -- stands as the gist of what I learned as a young person reading this book, and will likely stand as the gist of what I learned at this job when it's all said and done:
"The first thing you will notice when you 'add' a room to a house is that 'add' is generally the wrong word, because the way you use all the rest of the house, the way you live and organize your time and even your relationships, will be affected by the change. Existing rooms will be used differently, sounds will echo in new ways, community and privacy will have new meanings. Gaps will open where familiar items have been shifted to the new space and new acquisitions will fill them. The new room is not simply tacked on to the east or west side of the house, it represents a new configuration of the entire building and the lives it shelters."
Which is to say, to reflect back on what I was reading before this, my biggest epiphany of the past year or so is that I'm not freaked out about not writing Frankenstein when I was 18 anymore. Mary Shelley wrote in her diary that she was fully ready to die at 30.
"The first thing you will notice when you 'add' a room to a house is that 'add' is generally the wrong word, because the way you use all the rest of the house, the way you live and organize your time and even your relationships, will be affected by the change. Existing rooms will be used differently, sounds will echo in new ways, community and privacy will have new meanings. Gaps will open where familiar items have been shifted to the new space and new acquisitions will fill them. The new room is not simply tacked on to the east or west side of the house, it represents a new configuration of the entire building and the lives it shelters."
Which is to say, to reflect back on what I was reading before this, my biggest epiphany of the past year or so is that I'm not freaked out about not writing Frankenstein when I was 18 anymore. Mary Shelley wrote in her diary that she was fully ready to die at 30.
September 7, 2015
Many years ago, I read Bateson's Composing A Life. It was a meaningful read at that time of my life. Now comes Composing a Further Life, very meaningful at my present time of life. Bateson and I are about the same age. In this book she shares her ideas on how it is to be in a newly defined stage of life, in between the productive years of working and raising children and the old age years. Retirement years can also be productive and stimulating. Bateson has interviewed a number of folks, men and women (in her previous book she interviewed only women) and shares their stories of how they (and she) are living in these in between years. I think this is a significant read for those in their sixties and seventies, or those approaching that time of life.
October 31, 2010
This book bored the hell out of me and I had to stop after 100 pages. I gave her a chance but found her too academic and dry. Also found her too conventional which is such an odd thing to say about the daughter of Margaret Mead. Too much granny power, not enough deep insights after 70 years of living. Was hoping this would be more like Carolyn Heilbrun's The Last Gift of Time: Life Beyond Sixty, a more original perspective on aging. Maybe I'll return to this book in 30 years but, for now, I'm moving on.
July 1, 2011
I was disappointed. The people interviewed were from a different world--highly educated in prestigious schools, patrons of culture, administrators of non-profit organizations. Quite different from my life. I didn't find much information or encouragement for someone like me to compose my further life.
May 24, 2011
As in Composing a Life, Mary Catherine Bateson (daughter of Margaret Mead and Gregory Bateson) interviews individuals who have actively resolved challenges to create a life in in their second stage of adult hood. Her intent in this book is to place another stage of life into Eric Erikson's life stages. Calling the years between 55 and 75 Adulthood II a period when we are still healthy enough to make life a fruitful life and make a contribution to future generations. I sometimes wondered where she was going with the book as the themes were interspersed in her discussion of the lives of those involved. But in the end she drew it all together and it make a lot of sense and is definitely worth reading for those of us who are in that stage or headed towards it. Her titles Composing a Life and Composing a Further Life, hit home for me as I challenge myself to think creatively about the years ahead.
June 20, 2011
This is a book about life between the ages of 55-70 or more. I kept on waiting for this book to get more interesting or provide more guidance than it did. Her basic conclusion is that because people live longer, we have more time to resolve issues and become better people--as long as we keep learning.
November 29, 2017
Not new, but for me in 2017, perfectly timed. There is a lot of wisdom in this book.
October 16, 2017
I read the first part of this "series," "Composing a Life," when it first came out a couple of decades ago and really appreciated it. I heard an interview with Dr. Bateson on Krista Tippet's public radio show, "On Being," that discussed this new book, "Composing a Further Life," and I wanted to read it. However, I found it somewhat disappointing.
Some of her ideas are great and the premise is good. She concludes that, since humans live longer, now, than ever before, human development once again has to alter its "sections." Bateson, like Dr. Erik Erikson (someone she studied with), has therefore added another developmental phase which she calls "Adulthood II," whose psychological crisis is "Engagement vs. Withdrawal," whose basic strength is "Active Wisdom," and whose basic pathology is "Indifference." This stage fits in just before Erikson's added stage, VIII, (one he added later in his life), whose crisis is "Integrity vs. Despair," whose strength Bateson renames to be "'Receptive' Wisdom," and whose pathology she reframes as "Disdain" AND "'Humility.'"
I liked some of her examples and her reasoning. I particularly appreciated her recommendation that we adults, especially we in Adulthood II (around "retirement" age but not "elderly," yet), be more forthcoming and honest about our mistakes, shortcomings, wrong turns, etc., so that those coming up after us will have a more realistic picture of what being an adult is like. She writes:
One thing that young people need to know...is that [we] have not lived perfect
lives, that some of [our] wisdom comes from the experiences [we] hope the nest
generation never has to share. These are the very stories the next generation may
not have the privilege of hearing.
Inspiring and good advice, I think.
However, what disappointed me about this book is how repetitive it is. Perhaps she/her editor believes readers may not read each chapter, or not read them in sequence. That might explain how much is repeated across chapters. But, I still found it jarring and odd to read the same information about interview subjects or topics multiple times.
I also didn't like the way she removed herself so thoroughly (as an anthropologist would, but not as a participant-observer would, which she certainly IS for these topics) from the conversations with all but one or two of her subjects. I wasn't all that interested in reading what were simply unedited transcripts of her conversations with little analysis or commentary from her. I wanted to hear from her more, not them.
Maybe that's just my preference.
In any case, if you are approaching the age of 50 or already between 50 - 70, living in a Western type of lifestyle, this book may appeal to you. Not good for most others, I imagine. Others will probably never pick it up or find it boring or irrelevant.
Some of her ideas are great and the premise is good. She concludes that, since humans live longer, now, than ever before, human development once again has to alter its "sections." Bateson, like Dr. Erik Erikson (someone she studied with), has therefore added another developmental phase which she calls "Adulthood II," whose psychological crisis is "Engagement vs. Withdrawal," whose basic strength is "Active Wisdom," and whose basic pathology is "Indifference." This stage fits in just before Erikson's added stage, VIII, (one he added later in his life), whose crisis is "Integrity vs. Despair," whose strength Bateson renames to be "'Receptive' Wisdom," and whose pathology she reframes as "Disdain" AND "'Humility.'"
I liked some of her examples and her reasoning. I particularly appreciated her recommendation that we adults, especially we in Adulthood II (around "retirement" age but not "elderly," yet), be more forthcoming and honest about our mistakes, shortcomings, wrong turns, etc., so that those coming up after us will have a more realistic picture of what being an adult is like. She writes:
One thing that young people need to know...is that [we] have not lived perfect
lives, that some of [our] wisdom comes from the experiences [we] hope the nest
generation never has to share. These are the very stories the next generation may
not have the privilege of hearing.
Inspiring and good advice, I think.
However, what disappointed me about this book is how repetitive it is. Perhaps she/her editor believes readers may not read each chapter, or not read them in sequence. That might explain how much is repeated across chapters. But, I still found it jarring and odd to read the same information about interview subjects or topics multiple times.
I also didn't like the way she removed herself so thoroughly (as an anthropologist would, but not as a participant-observer would, which she certainly IS for these topics) from the conversations with all but one or two of her subjects. I wasn't all that interested in reading what were simply unedited transcripts of her conversations with little analysis or commentary from her. I wanted to hear from her more, not them.
Maybe that's just my preference.
In any case, if you are approaching the age of 50 or already between 50 - 70, living in a Western type of lifestyle, this book may appeal to you. Not good for most others, I imagine. Others will probably never pick it up or find it boring or irrelevant.
June 3, 2019
“… When I interview people, I often have the sense that they are learning from the reawakening of their memories as they retrace the past. Memory is precious, but it is not always clear how to use it or what obligations one has to what has gone before. Looking back over a lifetime takes different forms. A body of professionals has evolved who help individuals through a partially formalized process of 'life review,' which has always in some sense been one of the preoccupations of old age, taking many forms and often focusing on one aspect of a life, rather than the whole. There are always surprises, as the remembering and retelling flow into the present and toward the future. Sometimes the answer to 'What next?' is to reach back in time for something that has been neglected, perhaps for years. Some people return to a childhood home or seek out old friends long out of touch. Some people return to a skill that has been neglected, dusting off the grand piano or digging out an old set of watercolors.”
July 14, 2022
I gained so much from this book I accidentally read (intending for Composing a Life, woops!) and found out about how to continue aging, how to continue living, and how to build a life with regard to that additional extra room. I found solace in the conversations on interfaith connections and doing in an older age what has been left behind in youth, or discovered anew. The turning towards faith is an interesting tone in this book -- it definitely makes me feel older than I expected! I still want to read her earlier works, but have found that this one illuminates a lot still, just 40 years earlier than expected.
July 19, 2021
Bates proposes a stage of life called “Adulthood II,” the time after children are grown and formal work ends. It’s a generative period of time to consolidate the wisdom and skill of working and living and to provide needed assistance to younger adults and/or grandchildren. The book consists of a series of extended interviews with people who are living out Adulthood II, including Jane Fonda and others. The interviews were interesting, but I would have liked more direct laying out of the features of Adulthood II.
September 24, 2021
The book was very well-written, not surprising given the author has written a lot of books and articles and is an academic. Bateson is clearly wise and I wish she could rule the world; she has such empathy and knowledge. I gave the book only three stars because the content didn't resonate with me as much as I thought it would. I'm only just beginning my second adulthood and am a literal pragmatist, so the religion and spirituality didn't resonate with me. My favorite parts of the book were the interviewees' stories of their own lives.
December 8, 2018
This was actually my second time reading this book, though I had forgotten that until I started reading and spotted my distinctive annotations. I’m sure I read it for my women and aging research project, and the fact that I didn’t remember says it didn’t stick in my memory very well. There is good stuff here, but I find the style kind of dense, and the stories she tells here were not as compelling to me as in her Composing a Life, which I adored.
December 2, 2019
Wisdom
If you are approaching retirement or another kind of late-in-life transition, don't pass up a chance to learn from this illuminating book. It starts a path of discernment readers eager to find a refreshing and also familiar coherence emerge as they seek new ways to matter in a world that needs their "active wisdom."
If you are approaching retirement or another kind of late-in-life transition, don't pass up a chance to learn from this illuminating book. It starts a path of discernment readers eager to find a refreshing and also familiar coherence emerge as they seek new ways to matter in a world that needs their "active wisdom."
August 26, 2019
It gets a 4 instead of a 3 because I found myself clipping/highlighting lots of little bits. The book is organized by individuals and their stories rather than by the themes that those stories share, which is fine, but when it is time for synthesis, it feels thin. Still, glad I read it.
March 6, 2021
A thought-provoking guide to continuing to learn and grow as you age: "The search for new learning complements the need to understand the most important continuities of each life, the strands that we might pick from the complex weave and say, 'This is who I am and what I stand for.'"
August 19, 2017
Too anecdotal for such an important topic. Some interesting ideas.
November 25, 2017
I heard an interview of her on On Being which prompted me to get the book. Interesting yet the people she profiles seem to inhabit a slim rarified section of society.
July 18, 2019
Lots of good information
April 16, 2020
This was a terrific read. Thanks, Jody, for the reading gift filled with real life stories of interesting and dynamic persons.
February 19, 2021
This is an intriguing premise but I got turned off by her in the first essay.
July 17, 2021
I found this book to be frustrating and muddled and was disappointed since I love her earlier Composing a Life book.
March 30, 2022
Some interesting ideas but gets bogged down in the tedium of the people she uses as illustrations.
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