What do you think?
Rate this book
Pieces of Intelligence: The Existential Poetry of Donald H. Rumsfeld
Donald Rumsfeld is not just a two-time Secretary of Defence, former CEO, former White House Chief of Staff, and the most outspoken and forceful civilian military leader in recent American history. He is also, intentionally or not, a poet. At last, the ubiquitous and at times unintelligible U.S. Secretary of Defence has been deciphered by humorist Hart Seely, who found that the rambling raconteur is best understood when set in verse. Seely uncovers zen poems and lyrics, haikus and sonnets and has plucked the golden apples from 'D.H.' Rumsfeld's tree to present over 100 hilarious gems drawn from Rummy's public statements. Whether you love him or hate him, they're irresistible.
As we know,
There are known knowns.
There are things we know we know.
We also know
There are known unknowns.
That is to say
We know there are some things
We do not know.
But there are also unknown unknowns,
The ones we don't know we don't know.
As we know,
There are known knowns.
There are things we know we know.
We also know
There are known unknowns.
That is to say
We know there are some things
We do not know.
But there are also unknown unknowns,
The ones we don't know we don't know.
128 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2003
About the author
Hart Seely
9 books3 followersHart Seely is an award-winning reporter for the Post-Standard newspaper in Syracuse. His humor pieces have appeared in The New Yorker, The New York Times, National Lampoon, The New Republic, Village Voice, Slate, Spy and NPR. He has written or edited five books, including O Holy Cow: The Selected Verses of Phil Rizzuto and Pieces of Intelligence: The Existential Poetry of Donald Rumsfeld. Seely lives in Syracuse with his wife, Janice, and three children. There, from his living room, he wins baseball games for the New York Yankees.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews
February 3, 2025
"Needless to Say
Needless to say,
The president is correct.
Whatever it was he said."
...and many more - great concept!
This is kind of a 'found' poetry book; extracting poetic meaning from a source that is (in most cases) not connected to poetry. Would love to see a Kim Kardashian version at some future time!
Needless to say,
The president is correct.
Whatever it was he said."
...and many more - great concept!
This is kind of a 'found' poetry book; extracting poetic meaning from a source that is (in most cases) not connected to poetry. Would love to see a Kim Kardashian version at some future time!
May 14, 2013
Donald Rumsfeld was a fucknut. Old, wrinkly, weird-looking, and you could just tell by looking that he probably smelled like fish oil. But, Good Lord, could that guy say some amazing shit. I often found great joy listening to his press conferences because they were so amazingly fucked up... and yet, profound. Like this rather famous gem, taken from a Feb. 12, 2002 Department of Defense briefing: "As we know, there are known knowns. There are things we know we know. We also know there are known unknowns. That is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns, the ones we don't know we don't know." Brilliant! Genius! It sounds like incoherent bullshit, but listen to it again. Better yet, read it aloud. This shit is best appreciated the way Rummy intended: spoken word. Thankfully, Hart Seely had the hindsight to compile the best of Rummy's verbal masturbation in this short book, "Pieces of Intelligence: The Existential Poetry of Donald H. Rumsfeld". Seriously, it's a joy. We've seen how our illustrious President Obama, his cronies, and his Republicans detractors have all mastered the Art of Bullshit, but to really see (and hear) a Master Debater, one must look toward Rummy. I leave one more fantastic little diamond of a haiku, from a Feb. 28, 2003 DoD briefing: "Needless to say, the president is correct. Whatever it was he said." Seriously, I'm getting misty-eyed just writing that...
June 5, 2013
This Memorial Day, I did not hang up my flag in the front yard. I stayed inside and watched the documentary, No End in Sight. It is about the beginning of the Iraq war, and we are still there in a country that had nothing to do with 9/11, a dozen years later. No End in Sight contained some footage of Rumsfeld, and I had forgotten what an a$$hole he was, or at least the memory had dimmed somewhat.
It reminded me that someone had published a book of Rumsfeld's "poetry," so I checked it out from the library, and it did not disappoint. After I learned that Rumsfeld is INTJ, I had a smidge more tolerance and understanding for him, and I could laugh more easily at his bizarre and condescending sound bites. I can relate to:
Me
I'm brusque.
I'm impatient.
It's genetic.
I can't help it.
Rumsfeld's mangling and incomprehensible use of metaphor alone is worth checking out. This should be standard classroom reading on how not to do it. On the other hand, I wish sonnets flowed as easily from my tongue.
Side note: I also thought it was appropriate that this is my 666th book for GoodReads!
It reminded me that someone had published a book of Rumsfeld's "poetry," so I checked it out from the library, and it did not disappoint. After I learned that Rumsfeld is INTJ, I had a smidge more tolerance and understanding for him, and I could laugh more easily at his bizarre and condescending sound bites. I can relate to:
Me
I'm brusque.
I'm impatient.
It's genetic.
I can't help it.
Rumsfeld's mangling and incomprehensible use of metaphor alone is worth checking out. This should be standard classroom reading on how not to do it. On the other hand, I wish sonnets flowed as easily from my tongue.
Side note: I also thought it was appropriate that this is my 666th book for GoodReads!
August 15, 2015
Transformation
Let me just say one last word
About this word transformation.
It leaves an impression
That you start in an untransformed state,
And then you transform
And become a transformed state.
Life isn't like that.
Life is dynamic,
It's changing,
And really it's transforming.
How fabulous is that?! I miss Rummy so much! The entire collection is direct quotes from Rummy (that one was from a 3/6/2003 Pentagon town hall meeting), laid out in a format that better suits them than standard prose...
Let me just say one last word
About this word transformation.
It leaves an impression
That you start in an untransformed state,
And then you transform
And become a transformed state.
Life isn't like that.
Life is dynamic,
It's changing,
And really it's transforming.
How fabulous is that?! I miss Rummy so much! The entire collection is direct quotes from Rummy (that one was from a 3/6/2003 Pentagon town hall meeting), laid out in a format that better suits them than standard prose...
February 19, 2015
Of all the books that document the oral words of a politician, transcribed and edited into odes, sonnets, haiku, and, ahem, "lyrical" poetry, this ... is one of them. Thank you, Mr. Rumsfeld, for your Homeric contributions.
September 2, 2011
Never was there an individual more appropriate for this kind of treatment. Four stars, merely because it was published in 2003 and misses out on another three years of Rummy material.
August 8, 2012
It's amazing to think every poem was based on something Rumsfeld actually said. This book and Nick Asbury's Corpoetics have inspired me to do a found poetry project. So hilarious!
August 25, 2014
When dealing with a difficult client who reluctantly gave us requirements for the project, time and again, I happened to mention that we have "known unknowns and unknown unknowns ..." My boss asked me to quit being so Rumsfeldian. But truly folks, Mr. Seely has taken Rumsfeldian rhetoric, verbatim, and created a comical yet serious selection of "poems" that do indeed question truth, reality and existence itself like no other thoughtless person could.
April 17, 2016
The great thing here is not that Rumsfeld's evasive ramblings can sometimes hint at something greater -- the great thing is that Seely has managed to put together some genuinely good poetry here. Thoughtfully done.
July 2, 2021
This is a clever book. Not genius, just clever. On the one hand, I read it with astonished delight on a bad day. On the other hand, after the first twenty pages, it felt like the author put very little time into collecting Rummy’s sayings from one proof of time only. Where was “How many Redwoods do you need?” And I expected mixing, with some of these short quotes on similar themes combined into one “poem” instead of being called three. Definitely worth an hour to read this, even twenty years after Rummy left office, but after digesting, it feels like a small bite of fast food.
January 29, 2023
simply one of the best books ive ever read and im not kidding.
September 15, 2023
This is hardly revelationary or a book that really compelled me. Sadly, not the biggest fan 😞
May 12, 2024
i just think this was not for me
Read
July 3, 2010Pull on your incontinence trousers...: You may well need them.
This is utterly hilarious. Seely's recognition of the Zen-like Beyond BushSpeak non-logic of Rumy (not to be confused with the actual poet Rumi!) is masterfully explored in this stunning volume.
Any American politician who states openly on TV that it didn't really matter if the UK did not come on board for the invasion of Iraq - as the Brits were preparing to commit their land, sea and air forces to a joint invasion force - has to be examined closely - for any neural activity, for example.
Hate him or hate him, Rumy has his Own Way of confusing the unwitting with his non-linear Joycean paradigms. Bush Snr. set the standard with his neologism-ridden BushSpeak, but clearly Rumy has turned out to be the Master of the Absurd.
The scary part about this 'existential poetry' is that much of it was lifted as is, and there are many literal quotes, however mind-tricking the meandering, Lewis Carroll on downers logic appears to become.
C. Colt's review is a work of art in itself and the best analysis of this Major Force in modern poetry I have yet read. But then, I have yet to read Rumy's psychiatric evaluations.
Man, know thyself - Aristotle
Uh? - Donald Rumsfeld.
This is utterly hilarious. Seely's recognition of the Zen-like Beyond BushSpeak non-logic of Rumy (not to be confused with the actual poet Rumi!) is masterfully explored in this stunning volume.
Any American politician who states openly on TV that it didn't really matter if the UK did not come on board for the invasion of Iraq - as the Brits were preparing to commit their land, sea and air forces to a joint invasion force - has to be examined closely - for any neural activity, for example.
Hate him or hate him, Rumy has his Own Way of confusing the unwitting with his non-linear Joycean paradigms. Bush Snr. set the standard with his neologism-ridden BushSpeak, but clearly Rumy has turned out to be the Master of the Absurd.
The scary part about this 'existential poetry' is that much of it was lifted as is, and there are many literal quotes, however mind-tricking the meandering, Lewis Carroll on downers logic appears to become.
C. Colt's review is a work of art in itself and the best analysis of this Major Force in modern poetry I have yet read. But then, I have yet to read Rumy's psychiatric evaluations.
Man, know thyself - Aristotle
Uh? - Donald Rumsfeld.
February 25, 2011
Light and funny.
November 5, 2012
Pretty okay, though not as biting as I was expecting. Still worth a read. My friend whom I read it to loves it. :)
Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews