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340 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1960
“i think i have had the happiest and luckiest of lives. maybe this is because i never expected as much as i got. what i expected was hard knocks. i always expected to have to work hard. maybe harder than other people because of my lack of education. and when the knocks came i felt it was no surprise. i had always known life was like that, full of uppercuts for the deserving and undeserving alike. but it would be ridiculous of me to complain. i find it impossible to feel sorry for myself. i count the years of defeat and grief and disappointment, and their percentage is so minute that it continually surprises and delights me.”

"I never realized I was doing anything but trying to make people laugh when I threw my custard pies and took pratfalls. Like anyone else I enjoy being called a genius. But I cannot take it seriously. Neither does Harold Lloyd, as far as I know. The only one of us who listened and accepted the role of genius intellectual critics thrust upon him was Chaplin. Sometimes I suspect that much of the trouble he's been in started the first time he read that he was a 'sublime satirist' and a first-rate artist. He believed every word of it and tried to live accordingly."
At any rate it was on purpose that I started looking miserable, humiliated, hounded, and haunted, bedeviled, bewildered, and at my wit's end. Some other comedians can get away with laughing at their own gags. Not me. The public just will not stand for it. And that is all right with me. All of my life I have been the happiest when folks watching me said to each other, "Look at the poor dope, wilya?" Because of the way I looked on the stage and screen the public naturally assumed that I felt hopeless and unloved in my personal life. Nothing could be farther from the fact. As long back as I can remember I have considered myself a fabulously lucky man. From the beginning I was surrounded by interesting people who loved fun and knew how to create it. I've had few dull moments and not too many sad and defeated ones. In saying this I am by no means overlooking the rough and rocky years I've lived through. But I was not brought up thinking life would be easy. I always expected to work hard for my money and to get nothing I did not earn. And the bad years, it seems to me, were so few that only a dyed-in-the-wool grouch who enjoys feeling sorry for himself would complain of them.
The cast for our two-reelers was always small. There were usually but three principals--the villain, myself, and the girl, and she was never important. She was there so the villain and I would have something to fight about. The leading lady had to be fairly good-looking, and it helped some if she had a little acting ability. As far as I was concerned I didn't insist that she have a sense of humor. There was always the danger that such a girl would laugh at a gag in the middle of the scene, which meant ruining it and having to remake it.
Even when making my two-reelers I worked on the theory that the story was always of first importance. But one thing we never did when making our silent comedies was put the story down on paper. On the other hand I never would agree to start shooting until I had in my mind a satisfactory ending for a story. The beginning was easy, the middle took care of itself, and I knew I could depend on my writers and myself to come up with any gags we might need as we went along.