Como convencer as pessoas a fazer o que você quer

by Susan M. Weinschenk

Estamos sempre tentando convencer alguém a fazer o que queremos – seja persuadir um cliente a comprar algo, um funcionário a ter mais iniciativa, o chefe a nos conceder um aumento ou o filho a ir para a cama. Algumas vezes dá certo, outras, não.

E se entendêssemos a ciência que está por trás daquilo que motiva as pessoas?

Neste livro, a doutora em psicologia Susan Weinschenk explica, por meio de 140 estratégias, como você pode usar o poder da psicologia e da neurociência para mudar suas táticas e, assim, ser bem-sucedido na hora de convencer as pessoas.

Genres: Psychology, Nonfiction, Business, Design, Self Help, Leadership, Communication

240 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2013

About the author

Susan Weinschenk has a Ph.D. in Psychology and over 30 years of experience as a behavioral psychologist. She applies neuroscience to predict, understand, and explain what motivates people and how to get people to take action.

Dr. Weinschenk is the author of several books, including How To Get People To Do Stuff, 100 Things Every Presenter Needs To Know About People, 100 Things Every Designer Needs To Know About People, and Neuro Web Design: What makes them click? She is the founder of the Weinschenk Institute. She teaches, speaks, mentors, and consults with Fortune 1000 companies, start-ups, non-profit agencies, and educational institutions, and writes a popular blog: www.theteamw.com/blog, and the “Brain Wise: Work better, work smarter” blog for Psychology Today.

Reviews

[Tobias Isaac · Rating 4 out of 5]

an easy read with a lot of "I knew that (but I've never practiced that)" facts :-)
everyone should read this book :-)

[Sergei_kalinin · Rating 3 out of 5]

Книга скорее не понравилась :(

Даже начал сгоряча делать по ней mindmap, но потом махнул на это дело рукой (ибо бессмысленно)...

Суть книги: это справочник по методам / техникам / приёмчикам (автор называет их "стратегии") психологического воздействия. Всего в книге 140 таких стратегий.

/Кстати, hint - можно не тратить время на чтение всей книги, а сразу открыть Главу 10 "Список стратегий" - и получить доступ к самому полезному в книге!/

Стратегии неравномерно разделены как бы на 7 типов психологического воздействия и описаны в соответствующих главах книги:

1) Потребность в принадлежности - в этом разделе собраны способы "социального давления" на человека, под влиянием которого он может изменить своё поведения.

/По большому счёту это пересказ идей Р.Чайлдини + небольшая подборка из "языка тела" - например, какую позу принять, чтобы выглядеть убедительней))) Моё мнение: лучше почитать самого Чайлдини или какой-нибудь хороший учебник по социальной психологии. Там эти методы социального влияния расписаны более толково и подробно. И, кстати, их гораздо больше ;) /

2) Привычки - это, кстати, относительно неплохая глава об устойчивых поведенческих схемах (привычках), и о том, как их можно изменить. Там особо ничего нового нет :) , но в целом глава неплохая.

3) Сила историй - ну куда же нынче без сторителлинга :))) Неплохая глава, которая мне понравилась. Методы влияния на других людей там описаны проверенные, хотя опять - ничего оригинального :( Мне лично читать было скучновато...

4. Кнут и пряник - эта глава вогнала меня в тоску :( По сути дела автор попыталась кратко и популярно изложить классические методы поведенческой психотерапии. На мой профессиональный взгляд все эти схемы подкрепления (стимул - реакция; поощрения и наказания; способы обуславливания рефлексов и т.п.) расписаны в книге плохо :( Сильно удивлюсь, если у кого-то из не имеющих психологического образования читателей получится применить написанное на практике...

/Альтернатива: любой обзорный учебник по психотерапии и см.главу про поведенческую терапию/

5. Инстинкты - также очень не понравившаяся мне глава :( В ней про оказание воздействия через создания мотивации на базе имеющихся у нас инстинктов. Название интригующее, но всё свелось к банальностям про то, что людей надо пугать или вставлять в свой рассказ "сексуальные" словечки и метафоры :(

/Вообще впечатление, что аффтар ничего в инстинктах не понимает... А почитать гораздо полезнее и практичнее что-нибудь классическое из Вилюнаса ;) /

6. Стремление к мастерству - тоже унылая глава про то, что воздействовать на людей можно и нужно через их "высшие потребности" в достижениях, самореализации, самоактуализации и т.п. По большому счёту в главе идёт пересказ 2-факторной теории мотивации Ф.Герцберга, плюс пересказ "Потока" Чиксентмихайи.

При этом рекомендации автора (на мой взгляд) довольно топорны и притянуты за уши, в стиле: "Чтобы воздействовать на человека, помогите ему войти в состояние потока". :)))))))) Мне вот даже подумать страшно, как бы я отреагировал на человека, пытающегося "помочь" мне войти в МОЁ состояние потока)))

7. Игры разума - самая мутная и странная глава, в которой собран винегрет из разных когнитивных трюков (по сути манипулятивных), позволяющих обойти критичность, и внушить какие-то идеи.

По большей части это пересказ идей Канемана о "быстром" и "медленном" мышлении; но в целом глава производит впечатление помойки - в одном месте просто собрана куча совершенно разноплановых и разнородных техник :( Местами попадаются и любопытные техники, но в целом... :(

С чистой совестью я могу порекомендовать лишь 9 главу книги, где собраны своего рода кейсы о том, как можно комбинировать различные методы/техники воздействия для решения каких-то конкретных житейских проблем. Например, как "заставить" людей сделать пожертвования в благотворительный фонд. Таких кейсов там примерно 20, и они расписаны довольно любопытно.

Резюме: книга бестолковая... Причём бестолковая именно из-за обилия приведённых техник. Причём, это именно россыпь разрозненных техник - и нет никакого системного понимания: как? когда? для чего? (и т.д.) их применять.

Как сказал Брюс Ли: "Я не боюсь того, кто изучает 10 000 различных ударов. Я боюсь того, кто изучает один удар 10 000 раз". А перед нами как раз "книга про 10 тыс.ударов"...

Как говорю я :) /психотерапевт с 15-летним стажем; профессионально изучавший и использующий многие из методов, описанных в книге/ - чтобы оказать психологическое воздействие вовсе не нужны 100500 методов. Методы вообще вторичны :) Гораздо важнее понимание контекста, мишени, ограничений, ресурсов и прочих системных вещей в другом человеке (и его жизненной ситуации). Потому что все эти системные вещи могут стократно усилить ваше правильно выбранное воздействие; а могут и свести на "нет" все ваши наугад применяемые 140 стратегий...

...а вот про это в книге нет ни слова...

[Douglas Summers-Stay · Rating 2 out of 5]

Read for my teaching job.
A lot of psychological tricks to manipulate people.
A manual for the "dark arts."
Many of the things that aren't simply asserted but are backed up with studies in here have failed to replicate in follow-up studies. She says that she falls somewhere between "it's never okay to manipulate people for any reason" and "it's only okay if you manipulate them to do something for their own good" but then goes on to contradict herself in the next sentence.
On the other hand, all these things that seem super obvious to me I see Trump getting away with every day of the week, so maybe there are just a lot of easily manipulable people out there.

[Nakul Shenoy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Susan takes the idea of teaching influence to the next level by making it very easy to understand. She breaks down the concepts to easily understandable key topics, and shares them as strategies to use. The learnings thus become actionable, and we get to learn which strategy to use in which context. I recommend this one.

[Norbert · Rating 4 out of 5]

Well written, and understandable book about 7 drives, and how to use it to understand and influence people. At the end of the book there is a useful section about combining and using them in real life situations.

[Mohamed Abd Elsalam · Rating 3 out of 5]

الكتاب يحتوي علي قدر كبير من الطرق والأساليب التي تجعل تعاملك مع الناس أسهل وذلك بمعرفة ميول الناس وما يفضلونه وجوانب شخصياتهم
الكاتبة تعطينا 7 أساليب علميه من علم النفس وهي
1- الحاجة للأنتماء
2- العادات
3-قوة القصص
4-الجزرة والعصا
5-الغرائز
6-الرغبة في الاتقان
7حيل العقل
لو تعلمت ما هي لدوافع لتلك الأساليب فيمكنك حمل الناس على فعل أي شيء تريده .

[هبه الشملان · Rating 3 out of 5]

كتاب ما توقعت يكون جيد من العنوان، ولكنه ليس بالسيء على الإطلاق. بعض من الاستراتيجيات جيدة وفعالة. من اقتباسات الكتاب التي اعجبتني اننا لا نتحدث عن السيطرة على العقول والأشخاص إنما ايجاد الطرق لإقناعهم وجعلهم يفهمون ويرغبون أداء المهام/متطلباتنا.

[Nattatida · Rating 3 out of 5]

รวบรวมเคล็ดลับทางจิตวิทยาของหนังสือเล่มดังหลายๆเล่ม อย่าง Atomic habit, tiny habit, think fast & slow พร้อมแนวทางในการนำไปประยุกต์ใช้

[Karen JEC · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read the book on my library app. Very well organized and easy to pick up and read when you have a few minutes here and there. In fact, that's probably a better way to read it rather than through large sittings because it is a very densely packed book. Every single piece of advice (and there are dozens upon dozens of decent tips) is tried and tested. It's not magic, it's actually hard work to orchestrate it -- but it looks like magic! Worth reading every couple of years, for rejuvenation.

Favourite quotes:

"We need to feel that we're in control and that we have choices. If we have too many choices, we won't choose anything at all. But if we don't have any choices, we lose motivation."

"A good teacher knows how to take a body of knowledge or skill set and break it down into smaller chunks. A good teacher is a master of mastery... You need to find the right amount of challenge to spark the desire for mastery, but not overwhelm it."

"Most of us think that we know what other people's schemas are, but often we're just projecting our schema onto others."

[Fritz · Rating 4 out of 5]

Despite the cringy title and embarrassing cover, this is actually a good compendium of currently à la mode psychological know-how

Most business/self-help books tend to be glorified blog posts with 70-80% filler to turn them into a book, but this is packed with superbly organised information. Although at time it feels like student notes for Thinking Fast and Slow, the author has her own audience and with their input created a very useful case studies section at the end.

On the negative side, it isn't clear how many of the theories are still accepted and how have since been discarded because non reproducible. But given all the sources are listed, it's very good starting point for further discoveries

[Rich B · Rating 4 out of 5]

Had read and enjoyed one of the author’s other books on using psychology in design, so was intrigued by this one on influence. Overall, it’s an interesting and fairly easy read, a good collation of the highlights of many studies and other works across 7 key motivational driver areas.

Probably best read if you haven’t already read lots around these 7 areas - need to belong, habits, power of stories, carrots and sticks, instincts, desire for mastery and tricks of the mind - as it stays mostly high level and doesn’t dive too deep into the detail. But this does mean, the writing is clear and concise and you get plenty of practical examples.

The reference and sources are all pretty good - e.g. Duhigg Habits, and Kahneman Thinking, Fast and Slow, so if you don’t want to plough through detailed accounts in specific areas, this gives you a good easily digestible overview of each. It’s easy to read and action-oriented.

However, this does give it one of its few down sides, in that it has a habit of making broad sweeping statements. No influence technique is 100% and the advice here only increases the chances of getting people to do stuff. There’s no guarantees these will work. Also, the case studies and examples have a strong US focus, so may not work the same way across all cultures. And weirdly, there’s no real ending. It just kinda stops with no real wrap-up or final point.

But these are minor quibbles. Overall, it’s packed full of clever ideas, well explained and easy to put into action. Worth a read, enjoyed it.

[Robertson Kunz · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lots of ideas for motivating people or getting them to do stuff.

I liked the idea of using a high number to anchor someone, even if it's an unrelated number, so that they will accept your proposal of whatever number you want.

It was interesting that they found that holding a heavy object caused people to take the other person more seriously such as job applicants got chosen for the job when they gave their resume with a heavy clipboard attached versus just giving a sheet of paper.

Another idea is to give people a choice because choice makes people feel like they are in control and people like being in control. So, give a few choices to make them feel like they are a part of things.

I liked the story about how a daycare center started applying a monetary fine to parents who picked up their children late actually caused more parents to show up late because now it was a matter of money and not just a matter of inconveniencing the daycare staff.

Lastly, people need to hear your voice to be convinced to do stuff, even if it's a recording and not in person.

[Duy Anh Nguyen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Một cuốn sách về tâm lý tuyệt vời. Thời gian này mình lại thích tìm hiểu về tâm lý con người và càng tìm hiểu thì càng hứng thú. Có lẽ vì hiểu tâm lý con người sẽ rất có lợi khi kinh doanh nên muốn tìm hiểu nó. Anyway, sẽ cố gắng rèn luyện thói quen đọc sách hàng ngày để đọc nhanh hơn nữa. Ban đầu dự định đọc trong 1 tuần mà thực tế đến cả tháng. Thuyết phục người khác luôn là điều mà chúng ta mong muốn làm trong cuộc sống. Sách nói về 7 nguồn động lực thúc đẩy con người thực hiện 1 hành vi nào đó:
1. Bản năng
2. Sức mạnh của những câu chuyện
3. Ảo giác của trí não
4. Nhu cầu gắn kết
5. Khao khát tinh thông
6. Thói quen
7. Củ cà rốt và cây gậy

Biết và hiểu cách khơi gợi những nguồn động lực này đúng hoàn cảnh sẽ giúp ta thuyết phục được người khác làm theo ý mình. Great

[Lu Dante · Rating 5 out of 5]

Tất cả chúng ta đều muốn người khác làm theo ý mình. Dù mục đích của ta là muốn người mua mua hàng, người bán bán hàng cho ta với giá hời, nhân viên chủ động làm việc hơn, hay người bạn đời vào bếp nấu bữa tối, thì nhiều hoạt động diễn ra hàng ngày của ta đều xoay quanh việc thuyết phục người khác làm theo ý mình.
Thay vì sử dụng những phương pháp thông thường lúc thì hiệu quả lúc thì không, bạn có thể khai thác sức mạnh của tâm lý học và khoa học về não bộ để thúc đẩy mọi người làm theo ý bạn, thậm chí là khiến họ muốn làm theo ý bạn.

Tôi đã áp dụng và rất nhiều trường hợp đã thành công. Cảm ơn tác giả.

[Javier Gonel · Rating 4 out of 5]

A short but very condensed read about how conversations can be easier. We all need to interact with other people and many times conversations start very wrong ending in disagreements. This book gathers a ton of tips with explanations and examples on how to prepare a conversation so they're more productive.

"Do Stuff" can be thought as manipulation, but it is more about preparing the conversation context and learning from the people you're talking to.

[Kyle · Rating 2 out of 5]

Dr. Weinschenk provides a decent overview of many psychological concepts. Many of the concepts are widely known, but it was nice to have them all in the same place. I understand that the goal of the text is to provide a summary, but too many of the concepts were oversimplified. Many of these concepts do not work as broadly or as simple as the text suggests. I would recommend skipping to the sections you are unfamiliar with and spending your time reading those references.

[Julia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Probably cheating to give this a rating before trying out any of the strategies, but I found this to be a good reference book, pulling together a lot of different ideas about influence together, giving the essence of the theory about it and ideas of how to put it into practice, grouping into chapters and a reference list at the end. Let's see how/if it works in practice!

[Madumitha · Rating 5 out of 5]

Interesting read. I don't know how useful the techniques will be in the real world; nevertheless, they kept me engaged. Some of the concepts in the book like goal gradient effect, power of testimonies, fear of loss etc have applications in user experience. Overall this book is a breezy read for a marketing or UX aspirant.

[Krista Hubley · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed the concepts in this book and jotted down several strategies to apply in my work life (project/technical management) and personally (marriage & parenting). I appreciated the references to studies that support the concepts and provide some “intellectual” data.

[Dana · Rating 4 out of 5]

Easy read with some cool pointers. It had a bit of a dip here and there, but all in all insightful.

The book cover is admittedly a bit awkward though, so I had to hide it when I was out with people.

[Nuttawat Kalapat · Rating 3 out of 5]

จิตวิทยา + เศรษฐศาสตร์พฤติกรรมแบบย่อยง่าย

ถ้า ไม่รู้จักงาน dan ariely กับ kahneman น่าจะได้4ดาว ครับ เล่มนี้

แต่พอรู้จักแล้วต้องลดมาเหลือ3ดาว
เพราะผู้เขียนเขาก็เอางานทดลองดังๆ มาสรุปให้อ่ายอีกที ให้มันกระชับให้สั้นลง

[Chó Yêu Cáo · Rating 5 out of 5]

A lot of useful tips.

[Daniela D · Rating 5 out of 5]

An excellent summary of all the theories in human behavior very well organized and ready to be applied for any situation where you need to convince yourself or others around you to do something good.

[Christopher Lim · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's a quick read through a bunch of psychology topics for persuasion. I think it's helpful as a reference/survey book.

[Orban · Rating 5 out of 5]

The book showed and explained us more than hundreds of practical advises how to deal with situations.

[Manoj Saha · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very well organized and explained with the help of seven drivers and refers to new-age research on behavioural psychology. An excellent read for anyone who needs to get work done.

[Kavish · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's a good book.but not the best book on persuasion.

[Schnellreich · Rating 2 out of 5]

Можно ограничиться последней главой

[Nestor Jimenez · Rating 4 out of 5]

A good reference to apply to different contexts.

[Peter Pusztai · Rating 3 out of 5]

Liked the slow and fast thinking parts that referenced Daniel Kahneman, but overall quite obvious techniques.