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My Wicked, Wicked Ways
A hero to millions who adored his portrayals of Robin Hood and Fletcher Christian, Errol Flynn (1909-59) lived a life that far surpassed any adventure he ever acted out on screen: exotic travels, criminal exploits, passionate love affairs, violent confrontations, scandals, and international fame. In this highly readable, witty and colourful autobiography, reissued by Aurum Press in B-format using the original uncensored text, Flynn reveals himself and his remarkable life as he did nowhere else.
438 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1959
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About the author
Errol Flynn
18 books35 followersErrol Flynn appeared in some 60 films from 1933 to the late 1950s and gained the reputation of being the quintessential Hollywood swashbuckling sword-wielding adventure hero. His private life was a different matter altogether, and he was involved in a number of scandal-laden Hollywood incidents.
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January 26, 2015
I've never read anyone wallow so gloriously in their own evil--and evil is the only word for it. The womanizing was apparently the least wicked thing he did. He was a slave trader in New Guinea, for God sakes!
So, I obviously didn't come away liking him as a person. But as a writer he was remarkably good, in a glib, raconteurish type of way. It reminded me of Humbert Humbert, the unctuous, self-justifying narrator of Lolita. He is describing his own evil acts, but doing it in such a way that you begin to feel sympathy for him. As if no one that witty and sophisticated and self-pitying could possibly be a child molester.
In the end, what more can you say about a man who met his second wife at his first rape trial?
Update:
The day before yesterday TCM showed Errol Flynn movies all day long, as well as a documentary about him. Watching some of his movies again, I've changed my mind about him as an actor. He could give a good performance when he believed in the movie (e.g., Objective, Burma!) The problem was he didn't like doing the kind of films they cast him, and it wasn't until late in his career when he could no long swash a buckle, that he got the roles he wanted.
Also, the documentary made clear that his autobiography was mostly just good literature (i.e., total bullshit, well told.) Ironically, the fact that he's a liar makes him not as bad a person as I thought.
So, I obviously didn't come away liking him as a person. But as a writer he was remarkably good, in a glib, raconteurish type of way. It reminded me of Humbert Humbert, the unctuous, self-justifying narrator of Lolita. He is describing his own evil acts, but doing it in such a way that you begin to feel sympathy for him. As if no one that witty and sophisticated and self-pitying could possibly be a child molester.
In the end, what more can you say about a man who met his second wife at his first rape trial?
Update:
The day before yesterday TCM showed Errol Flynn movies all day long, as well as a documentary about him. Watching some of his movies again, I've changed my mind about him as an actor. He could give a good performance when he believed in the movie (e.g., Objective, Burma!) The problem was he didn't like doing the kind of films they cast him, and it wasn't until late in his career when he could no long swash a buckle, that he got the roles he wanted.
Also, the documentary made clear that his autobiography was mostly just good literature (i.e., total bullshit, well told.) Ironically, the fact that he's a liar makes him not as bad a person as I thought.
February 2, 2013
It was kind of a relief to finish this book. Reading it was kind of like having an extended visit from a drunken uncle who has great stories, zero self-awareness, some uncomfortable opinions, and ventures into TMI especially when talking about boobs. Uncle Errol never learns from his mistakes. He pinches your cheeks and causes a lot of awkward moments. He's sipping vodka and fondly believes you think it's water. After several shots from his "water bottle," he starts philosophizing like a drunk college senior. You're never sure whether to believe his stories about the crocodiles and swindling natives in Papua New Guinea.
Uncle Errol's never boring, but you do wind up feeling pretty sorry for him (and any woman who had to deal with him on a regular basis, except maybe Lili Damita, who honestly does sound pretty terrible).
Uncle Errol's never boring, but you do wind up feeling pretty sorry for him (and any woman who had to deal with him on a regular basis, except maybe Lili Damita, who honestly does sound pretty terrible).
November 6, 2013
Apparently he wanted to title it "In Like Me." In my quest for the sleaziest Hollywood memoir (Scotty Bowers's "Full Service" and Lever's "Me Cheeta" are top of the list so far), I found Errol Flynn's autobiography to be valuable in many more ways than this. Written at the age of 50 when he was washed up, drinking himself to death, living mostly on his Jamaican estate but also enjoying a second wind of film success playing layabouts and has-beens rather than swashbuckling heroes, My Wicked Wicked Ways was published after Flynn's death shortly after. He led an amazing life: born in Tasmania, son of a famed naturalist who was the first person to bring platypuses to England for study, descendant on his mother's side from Bounty mutineers (with the sword arm to prove it), he ran tobacco plantations and engaged in shady dealings and battles with crocodiles and cannibals in New Guinea for four years--he was surreptitiously filmed dueling with a croc by some Hollywood location scouts and they hired him--as well as serving in both the Sino-Japanese War and the Spanish Civil War, traveling around the world, having an out-of-body experience in an opium den in Macau, having his stomach slit wide open by a rickshaw driver in Ceylon and surviving, befriending everyone from King Farouk to U.S. presidents, being turned on to marijuana by Diego Rivera, getting to know Fidel Castro personally in Cuba, screwing probably literally thousands of women etc. In fact, the book is so jam-packed that the Castro stuff only gets referred to, not told. Flynn also reveals himself as a confused, vulnerable, often self-loathing soul whose biggest regret was not having become a writer of a very intellectual stripe, which had been his first dream. He portrays the statutory-rape charges brought against him as politically motivated (something about being made an example of by a D.A. who had not received his kickbacks from the studios), and indeed they possibly were. In any event, he was humiliated, impoverished, and raked over the coals by self-proclaimed defenders of morals for something that wouldn't be a crime in most countries: a man in his early 30s having a consensual one-night stand with a 17-year-old hardly makes him a Polanski or an Arbuckle.
Flynn seems so self-aware, self-deprecating, and self-reflective that it's almost amazing he was actually an actor. Indeed, it is very tough not to like this fellow. It would have been fun to know him.
Turns out there's a huge literature ABOUT Flynn above and beyond this, including accusations that he was a Nazi, which does not really square with taking his life into his hands by fighting Franco's forces in Spain and sneaking into Cuba to meet Castro. There seems to be quite a cult of him. I'd appreciate any references to the best stuff written about him after his death. Not interested in the biopics, though.
Flynn seems so self-aware, self-deprecating, and self-reflective that it's almost amazing he was actually an actor. Indeed, it is very tough not to like this fellow. It would have been fun to know him.
Turns out there's a huge literature ABOUT Flynn above and beyond this, including accusations that he was a Nazi, which does not really square with taking his life into his hands by fighting Franco's forces in Spain and sneaking into Cuba to meet Castro. There seems to be quite a cult of him. I'd appreciate any references to the best stuff written about him after his death. Not interested in the biopics, though.
January 18, 2014
What can one say about Errol Flynn after reading this book? He certainly led an incredible life and definitely the title of "my wicked wicked ways" fits perfectly. How much is actually true without embellishment I'm unsure of and therefore take it all with a grain of salt. Authenticity aside, he is a surprisingly good writer. He is blunt and open about his life and things he's done. One gets the impression that he spent his life searching for something that would have given him true happiness and that he might not have known what to do with it had he found it. Towards the end of the book he describes himself as such
" I want faith and I am faithless.
I love myself and hate myself
I want to be loved but I may myself be incapable of really loving."
His autobiography may not endear him to some people but I found it a fascinating story of a man who was always searching for the answers and never quite seemed to find them. He seems to me to be an authentic and completely, naturally, imperfect human.
" I want faith and I am faithless.
I love myself and hate myself
I want to be loved but I may myself be incapable of really loving."
His autobiography may not endear him to some people but I found it a fascinating story of a man who was always searching for the answers and never quite seemed to find them. He seems to me to be an authentic and completely, naturally, imperfect human.
May 17, 2014
This book sticks with you in ways that will benefit and bring you down. The words make sense, and at the same time are self destructive. By the last page you'll feel like you're losing your best friend. Your soul will be compromised. Your mind will long for more.
Flynn will be in, and the "in" will send careless whispers through your mundane days.
The ups and downs will tickle your spirit.
You'll feel like a man -- woman -- a free spirit. You'll fist fight the fool. You'll charm the virginal to the point of orgasim
You'll overtake Hollywood, legal jurisprudence, and the prude alike. All the while you'll grasp this book in your hands longing for an orange filled with Vodka . You'll meet art. You'll meet literature. You'll meet debauchery, lechery, petty theft, victory and defeat.
Already you're in in -- now you can be in like Flynn.
Flynn will be in, and the "in" will send careless whispers through your mundane days.
The ups and downs will tickle your spirit.
You'll feel like a man -- woman -- a free spirit. You'll fist fight the fool. You'll charm the virginal to the point of orgasim
You'll overtake Hollywood, legal jurisprudence, and the prude alike. All the while you'll grasp this book in your hands longing for an orange filled with Vodka . You'll meet art. You'll meet literature. You'll meet debauchery, lechery, petty theft, victory and defeat.
Already you're in in -- now you can be in like Flynn.
March 21, 2015
Errol Flynn describes himself as a "tormented" man. My impression from his book is, that he was not an altogether happy man. He wanted to be taken seriously and he didn't feel that people took him seriously. He had aspirations as a writer and despite getting published, he felt he failed in this too. He was a man who, perhaps surprisingly, thought deeply and felt much, but did not always choose a wise course in life. "I am a contradiction inside a contradiction", he wrote and I think that might have been very true.
His autobiography reads like an adventure novel, said one commenter. I agree with this statement. From his ventures in New Guinea to his passing away (in Canada, I believe) he was a man of action, always looking out for new adventures, ideas, women and riches. He did achieve this, but as I mentioned before, he was not quite satisfied. On the contrary, he felt that his motion picture career had hindered his becoming what he had really wanted to become and be perceived as whom he really was.
I cannot say, after reading this, that I envy the destiny of the man who wrote it. But he certainly had varying experiences and tried to live life as fully as he could.
The book in itself is roller-coaster ride with hardly a dull moment. If you're into classic Hollywood stars and adventure stories, I can heartily recommend it!
His autobiography reads like an adventure novel, said one commenter. I agree with this statement. From his ventures in New Guinea to his passing away (in Canada, I believe) he was a man of action, always looking out for new adventures, ideas, women and riches. He did achieve this, but as I mentioned before, he was not quite satisfied. On the contrary, he felt that his motion picture career had hindered his becoming what he had really wanted to become and be perceived as whom he really was.
I cannot say, after reading this, that I envy the destiny of the man who wrote it. But he certainly had varying experiences and tried to live life as fully as he could.
The book in itself is roller-coaster ride with hardly a dull moment. If you're into classic Hollywood stars and adventure stories, I can heartily recommend it!
May 30, 2014
Clay-footed Errol Flynn set me to thinking with his autobiography. Perhaps what struck me the most was the extreme contrast between the first half of his life, living in unpretentious, free-spirited, straightforward, poverty stricken, primitive, basic-human-level, wild west culture with Tasmania, Australia and New Guinea....And then fairly quickly being whisked to the most pretentious place on earth, Hollywood, with endless riches, glitz and glamour, inescapable contracts and obligations, contrived images, acceptable lies and liars, the value of money over authentic experience and art. It seemed that once Errol Flynn either figured out what was happening to him and/or got bored with the whole Hollywood experience, a fist fight then ensued within to reclaim his roots and his guiltless free spirit. I found it interesting that he was not really a drinker to much extent until he reached Hollywood. I think he could have walked away from fame and money fairly easily had it not been for obligations to the children he had by that time and the need to pay for the adventures he craved and seemed to need to doctor himself. Though he didn't claim to be a good father, I think he was the type of man who couldn't abandon them financially, thus strapping him to the Hollywood scene for the rest of his life.
In terms of evaluating his life, I recall a claim from him that "human nature" may not be the same all over the world as we like to think. In the world of his youth, men took young girls for wives or companions as common practice, they lived by their wits or the seat of their pants to survive what may be around the next corner. I would think head hunters and cannibals can take you to new heights of fear and clever tricks for survival. The lack of money and hunger (which was very real to him at times) and few boundaries handed down from his parents may have led to his crime sprees. The use of fists or other minor "crimes" was an acceptable medium for settling disputes. One indicator of that was a New Guinea conviction for him that called for jail time or a fine. Very civilized it would seem. He had no money so he took jail time....but the problem was, there was no jail. Things were different in New Guinea. Not to mention the desperation that might swell up in a young man from a "civilized" family who was essentially abandoned by his parents at age 15 and began to make his way alone by age 17. Cruelty doesn't always look like a head hunter. Experiences like these shape a young man deeply and forever.
What I liked about Errol Flynn most was his brutal honesty about himself and how he saw his world. In a particular passage he talks extensively about his many contradictions. By that time in the book, it was easy to see those in him. But I also saw so many of those contradictions in myself. So was Flynn really all that different from the rest of us with his inward struggles or was he just more honest about them? For his own reasons, I suppose, it seemed that he focused heavily on his "wicked, wicked ways", and seemed to allow those to overshadow his intellect and child-like curiosity, friendship, generosity and goodness to others, his peculiar brand of naiveté, his extraordinary talent and professional achievements. I thought the most "wicked" part of him was his sense of humor! Though far from perfect, I think he was a much better man than he gave himself credit for. I winced often but by the time I got to the end of his story, I was in his corner.
In terms of evaluating his life, I recall a claim from him that "human nature" may not be the same all over the world as we like to think. In the world of his youth, men took young girls for wives or companions as common practice, they lived by their wits or the seat of their pants to survive what may be around the next corner. I would think head hunters and cannibals can take you to new heights of fear and clever tricks for survival. The lack of money and hunger (which was very real to him at times) and few boundaries handed down from his parents may have led to his crime sprees. The use of fists or other minor "crimes" was an acceptable medium for settling disputes. One indicator of that was a New Guinea conviction for him that called for jail time or a fine. Very civilized it would seem. He had no money so he took jail time....but the problem was, there was no jail. Things were different in New Guinea. Not to mention the desperation that might swell up in a young man from a "civilized" family who was essentially abandoned by his parents at age 15 and began to make his way alone by age 17. Cruelty doesn't always look like a head hunter. Experiences like these shape a young man deeply and forever.
What I liked about Errol Flynn most was his brutal honesty about himself and how he saw his world. In a particular passage he talks extensively about his many contradictions. By that time in the book, it was easy to see those in him. But I also saw so many of those contradictions in myself. So was Flynn really all that different from the rest of us with his inward struggles or was he just more honest about them? For his own reasons, I suppose, it seemed that he focused heavily on his "wicked, wicked ways", and seemed to allow those to overshadow his intellect and child-like curiosity, friendship, generosity and goodness to others, his peculiar brand of naiveté, his extraordinary talent and professional achievements. I thought the most "wicked" part of him was his sense of humor! Though far from perfect, I think he was a much better man than he gave himself credit for. I winced often but by the time I got to the end of his story, I was in his corner.
December 6, 2008
There was nobody like Errol Flynn. He was one-of-a-kind, a grown-up kid who, constantly looking for adventure, sailed through life on his good looks and innate charm.
He was really a "flake". He avoided responsibility, usually letting his "little head" dictate to the one on top of his neck.
No woman could hold him for very long.
You'd be a fool to loan Errol money, as his creditors back in his native Tasmania would be quick to tell you. He spent that green stuff like there was no tomorrow.
But, tomorrow did come and his last days were plagued with health and financial problems. He died at age 50.
What remains for us to savor is his dashing, heroic on-screen image that will be forever young.
I understand that this autobiography was ghost written, but Flynn certainly had a strong hand in writing it. The book has his wry, witty "voice" and is a very entertaining read.
He was really a "flake". He avoided responsibility, usually letting his "little head" dictate to the one on top of his neck.
No woman could hold him for very long.
You'd be a fool to loan Errol money, as his creditors back in his native Tasmania would be quick to tell you. He spent that green stuff like there was no tomorrow.
But, tomorrow did come and his last days were plagued with health and financial problems. He died at age 50.
What remains for us to savor is his dashing, heroic on-screen image that will be forever young.
I understand that this autobiography was ghost written, but Flynn certainly had a strong hand in writing it. The book has his wry, witty "voice" and is a very entertaining read.
July 1, 2021
The year was around 1982. We only had three channels to watch on TV. Even then, mom limited what we watched. However, my parents had just purchased a new device that would revolutionize our television viewing. The device? A Curtis Mathes VCR. From then on, my sisters & I learned the names of the classic titans of the screen: Humphrey Bogart, Clark Gable, Gary Cooper, Jimmy Stewart, Donna Reed, Alan Ladd, Bob Hope, and the list goes on and on and on. In addition, we saw nearly any Disney movie that came out. High on our favorite Disney list was the Apple Dumpling Gang along with the Love Bug series of movies.
One day, mom brought home a movie that soon became one of my favorite of all time. The movie? The 1939 version of The Adventures of Robin Hood starring Errol Flynn and Olivia de Havilland captivated my ten year old mind. Mesmerized by the swashbuckling antics of Flynn along with the aura he put off on the screen, I looked out for other movies in which Flynn starred. Captain Blood, Sea Hawk, Dodge City, & the Santa Fe Trail to name just a few were movies that I enjoyed.
As I became an adult, I learned that Errol Flynn lived quite a life. By his own words, he lived a very wicked life. And he was unashamed to state it.
Recently, I learned that Flynn had written an autobiography. Although he died before it was published, I was surprised to learn the name of the title - My Wicked, Wicked Ways. Now that I have read the book, I am not surprised. He truly lived a wicked, wicked life. Due to his choices, he also lived a sad, confused, and chaotic life.
This is a review of that book. Full disclosure here - I am writing as one who grew up in a Christian family. I was taught the Bible and had the blessing of attending a Christian school. For nearly the past twenty years, I have served in ministry pastoring and leading people to follow God's will for their life by taking heed to God's Word. And this is why I was so surprised that the very first page of the book (before the introduction and before the prologue) published by G.P. Putnam's Sons had the following Scripture verses at the bottom of the page:
"Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity; whisperers, Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents,"
Romans 1:29-30
"There is no peace, saith my God, to the wicked."
Isaiah 57:21
"Many sorrows shall be to the wicked."
Psalm 32:10
Never have I read of an account or story of someone's life that has so conclusively proved those verses than the life of Errol Flynn. Although reaching the zenith in his industry (Hollywood), having nearly any woman that he wanted all of his life, and earning millions of dollars, Flynn lived, and from all accounts, died a tortured, tormented, and confused soul. After reading of his life and exploits, he has no one to blame for his choices other than himself.
I cannot recommend the book other than as a case study in someone who has decided to live for himself and for himself alone. He truly was a selfish individual as he was married three times, had children, and continued to have multiple sexual relationships all his life. As someone who admired his persona on the screen, I am quite saddened at the life he lived off of the screen. While reading this book, one cannot but sense the confusion and despair of one who searched for life's meaning in sexual relationships, alcohol, and curiosity.
Without further ado, allow me to share some insights from Flynn's own words in the book:
"I have been in rebellion against God and Government ever since I can remember. As a result, I am tormented, as if I have been missing something that others have. You can have fame, fortune, be an international character, and wonder whether some little guy who has faith has something bigger than anything you have ever had."
-Errol Flynn, Prologue
I'm that "little guy who has faith" Errol. And yes, I will attest that I have something bigger than anything you ever had. I have a loving wife of nearly twenty-five years, children in whom we have invested and loved dearly, a calling in which I have found much satisfaction. I don't say this with glee. Just an astute observation regarding the author's own words.
"Listen, Errol, I would cheerfully kill or poison any ba***** who I knew was peddling drugs - any kind. And I would slowly strangle the other killer of the mind, the body, the soul, who openly sells alcohol. It's as criminal as any drug, the only difference being you can buy it at any street corner. As a doctor, I'd prefer to see a sign at the corner reading 'Your Favorite Cocaine Dealer' sooner than 'Your Favorite Liquor Dealer.' "
-Dr. Gerrit H. Koets (long time friend of Flynn), p.141
"Alcoholism is one of the slowest though most certain forms of suicide."
-Errol Flynn, p. 345
"Alcohol is a far greater killer than all opiates. You can buy alcohol on any street corner throughout the world. It gets your brain, your liver. It destroys your morals, destroys your vitality, kills the sexual potential, and you become sluggish. It is a great pity that Prohibition failed...As one of the heartiest drinkers in the world, I speak with a voice of authority."
-Errol Flynn, 1952, p. 409
I preach against alcohol. I have seen it ruin too many families, marriages, and relationships to be kind to it. Flynn, although a lover of alcohol (especially later in his life), often spoke against its stranglehold and effects it has on a person. As noted in the quote above, he wished that Prohibition had succeeded. He truly was addicted to the stuff.
In one part of the book, Flynn notes how he fell in love with the painting "The Man Is at Sea" by Vincent Van Gogh. He eventually acquired it and shares how the picture was emotional to him because of its reality and symbolism. He then goes on to draw a sad personal note re: the symbolism in the painting:
"I too had been at sea in my youth, in one way, and destined to be at sea intermittently ever afterward. I was also at sea in my effort to find out what things mean. I am still at sea."
-Errol Flynn, p.307
His quote reminds me of the verse the publishers left off quoting on the first page of the book. They quoted Isaiah 57:21. They would have done well to quote verse twenty also.
"But the wicked are like the troubled sea, when it cannot rest, whose waters cast up mire and dirt."
-Isaiah 57:20
Truly Errol Flynn lived a life of wickedness which resulted in a life of trouble and unrest. A life with no rest.
There is an anecdote in the book after Flynn's well-publicized rape trial in Los Angeles in which he describes his philosophy of life. Today, this philosophy has been described as YOLO - You Only Live Once. I quote Flynn here:
"For what went on trial, there in the Los Angeles Courthouse, was my personality and above all my way of life. Certainly, it was a much more complicated thing than has ever been presented by the press, the magazine writers, the clowns who joke about me on radio and television, and the fellows around saloons who tell salacious stories.
Bear in mind that at this time although married, I was technically a bachelor, a man living alone. I had no evil practices. I did no one any injury. I wasn't even drinking much. I would have champagne around and if people wanted it they could have it, and I'd take a bit with them, but that was it. I was thirty-four, in my prime; women liked me, I liked them; nobody got hurt. I thought, Let's have fun, let's live by the sunshine, let's swim and play; let's make love, let's cruise in the Pacific, let's have pleasant parties, gay chatter,; let's work, let's make pictures, let's entertain the people, let's be artists, if we can.
This was my balls, my way of living, breathing and exulting in this short swift act called Creation. Am I supposed to live as other people? Are they supposed to do what I do? Do I have to be made made over into their image, and they into mine?
...in brief, I like people. I like to enjoy the thrill of living every day, every hour of the day, for we are here only this once, and let's feel the wind while we may."
-Errol Flynn, pp. 321-322
Essentially, Flynn's philosophy was "Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die." Many before him have lived this way, many after him, and many do today. What a shortsighted view of life! God's Word tells us something completely different. We have this life and then eternity to look forward to (or to be afraid of) depending upon the final judgment:
"And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment;"
-Hebrews 9:27
I submit to you that there is a much better philosophy of life to follow than the one that Flynn lived out. Jesus summed it up two thousands years ago in the gospel of John:
"The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly."
-Jesus in John 10:10
The very last section of the book (approximately 100 pages) begins with a blank page with a squarish question mark on it. In this last section, we see the author wrestle with the questions of life. I appreciate his audacious honesty in describing the questions and mysteries that had eluded him thus far in life.
One day I called my valet. "Alexandre," I said, "I want you to put this monogram on each of my suits underneath the handkerchief pocket."
"Why"" he asked.
"That is a good question," I said. "Why? That is what I want to know and I can't find out why. So I want this monogram sewed unto onto all of my suits."
I had drawn a squarish question mark...
?
This, my own confusion, became my trademark. My own questioning of myself. Why? How does a man become what he becomes? Whom does he become? I do not know. I didn't know then.
But it pressed on my thinking so much that I felt I must carry this symbolism to gratify my own curiosity or torment, or to make people think.
I still wear a question mark beneath my handkerchief pocket on all of my suits. I am still wondering why.
-Errol Flynn, p.342
It's not often that you find the honesty of a man who (although he might not have known it) was near the end of his life. Speaking of life, in this same section of the book, he speaks about being at the pinnacle of the world, and yet it was nothing.
"There I was, sitting on top of the world. I had wealth, friends, I was internationally known, I was sought after by women. I could have anything that money could buy. Yet I found at the top of the world there was nothing."
-Errol Flynn, p. 348
In the gospel of Mark, Jesus speaks to this regard:
"For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?"
-Jesus, in Mark 8:36
Although toward the end of his days (remember, he only lived to be fifty years old due to his lifestyle), he was not about to change or to listen to anyone else regarding how to live his life. Notice his philosophy from some diary entries listed in the book five years before his death:
"I am in my mid-forties. They say I am a sight to behold, compared with my looks a few years back...it seems absurd, ridiculous and laughable that somebody should tell me how to behave during my brief span here on this earth. I feel like rebelling every time I think of it. A rough, bemused, rugged individualist, I was born this way and that is the way I will die. I have no clear-cut system of philosophy. I want none. I want no design for living. I want no one to tell me how to live. I will take it from day to day. I follow no leaders, no set of rules, and don't anyone lay down rules for me."
-Errol Flynn, 1954, p.413
This philosophy saddened me. The reason it saddened me is that the end of this philosophy is not a good end. Flynn's life and early death proved his statement completely. Life to him was a conundrum...something that could not be figured out. And he sure wasn't going to listen to anyone - God, government, parents, friends, wives, etc - telling him how to live his life. Reminds me of a particular verse from the wise man in the book of Proverbs:
"There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death."
-Solomon, Proverbs 14:12
Toward the very end of the book, Flynn quotes some frank diary entries. We get to glimpse into the mind of this tortured soul. I think you will agree with me that he truly was a tortured soul from some of the lines he writes:
"I have a zest for living yet twice an urge to die...
The pursuit of gold, pleasure, and danger motivate most of my springs...
I want faith and am faithless...
I love myself and hate myself...
I want to be loved but I may myself be incapable of really loving...
I laugh a lot, and I weep secretly more often than most men."
-Errol Flynn, p.416-417
On the last few pages of the book, Flynn boils down his thoughts wistfully and puts them to the page. You can judge him yourself if this is the writing of a happy, peaceful man:
"I am living with this brand - even relatively happily - but I wish it hadn't happened. I do not know whether I have conveyed it - or tried not to convey it - but I have been cut by my own sword so deeply that I am ready for whatever befalls. Flynn is not always In. Sometimes he is far far out - at the bottom of the chasm, at the bottom of the cleft...
I am unable to understand myself. Still not knowing who I am. Still hunting for my soul."
-Errol Flynn, p.437
In the 37th chapter of Psalms, David gives testimony as an older man. He contrasts the righteous man in verse 25-26 with that of the evil men he has seen in verses 35-36. He then tells us the man to watch...to pattern our life after...to learn from:
"I have seen the wicked in great power, and spreading himself like a green bay tree. Yet he passed away, and, lo, he was not: yea, I sought him, but he could not be found. Mark the perfect man, and behold the upright: for the end of that man is peace."
-Psalm 37:35-37
My childhood screen hero is not a role model. Not one single bit. In fact, his life is a warning to each and every one of us. Live your own life and you will pay the consequences. If you don't believe me, just read again the author's own words that I have quoted verbatim.
Yes, the wise man rings true regarding the way of the transgressor (the wicked):
"...the way of transgressors is hard."
-Proverbs 13:15b
One day, mom brought home a movie that soon became one of my favorite of all time. The movie? The 1939 version of The Adventures of Robin Hood starring Errol Flynn and Olivia de Havilland captivated my ten year old mind. Mesmerized by the swashbuckling antics of Flynn along with the aura he put off on the screen, I looked out for other movies in which Flynn starred. Captain Blood, Sea Hawk, Dodge City, & the Santa Fe Trail to name just a few were movies that I enjoyed.
As I became an adult, I learned that Errol Flynn lived quite a life. By his own words, he lived a very wicked life. And he was unashamed to state it.
Recently, I learned that Flynn had written an autobiography. Although he died before it was published, I was surprised to learn the name of the title - My Wicked, Wicked Ways. Now that I have read the book, I am not surprised. He truly lived a wicked, wicked life. Due to his choices, he also lived a sad, confused, and chaotic life.
This is a review of that book. Full disclosure here - I am writing as one who grew up in a Christian family. I was taught the Bible and had the blessing of attending a Christian school. For nearly the past twenty years, I have served in ministry pastoring and leading people to follow God's will for their life by taking heed to God's Word. And this is why I was so surprised that the very first page of the book (before the introduction and before the prologue) published by G.P. Putnam's Sons had the following Scripture verses at the bottom of the page:
"Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity; whisperers, Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents,"
Romans 1:29-30
"There is no peace, saith my God, to the wicked."
Isaiah 57:21
"Many sorrows shall be to the wicked."
Psalm 32:10
Never have I read of an account or story of someone's life that has so conclusively proved those verses than the life of Errol Flynn. Although reaching the zenith in his industry (Hollywood), having nearly any woman that he wanted all of his life, and earning millions of dollars, Flynn lived, and from all accounts, died a tortured, tormented, and confused soul. After reading of his life and exploits, he has no one to blame for his choices other than himself.
I cannot recommend the book other than as a case study in someone who has decided to live for himself and for himself alone. He truly was a selfish individual as he was married three times, had children, and continued to have multiple sexual relationships all his life. As someone who admired his persona on the screen, I am quite saddened at the life he lived off of the screen. While reading this book, one cannot but sense the confusion and despair of one who searched for life's meaning in sexual relationships, alcohol, and curiosity.
Without further ado, allow me to share some insights from Flynn's own words in the book:
"I have been in rebellion against God and Government ever since I can remember. As a result, I am tormented, as if I have been missing something that others have. You can have fame, fortune, be an international character, and wonder whether some little guy who has faith has something bigger than anything you have ever had."
-Errol Flynn, Prologue
I'm that "little guy who has faith" Errol. And yes, I will attest that I have something bigger than anything you ever had. I have a loving wife of nearly twenty-five years, children in whom we have invested and loved dearly, a calling in which I have found much satisfaction. I don't say this with glee. Just an astute observation regarding the author's own words.
"Listen, Errol, I would cheerfully kill or poison any ba***** who I knew was peddling drugs - any kind. And I would slowly strangle the other killer of the mind, the body, the soul, who openly sells alcohol. It's as criminal as any drug, the only difference being you can buy it at any street corner. As a doctor, I'd prefer to see a sign at the corner reading 'Your Favorite Cocaine Dealer' sooner than 'Your Favorite Liquor Dealer.' "
-Dr. Gerrit H. Koets (long time friend of Flynn), p.141
"Alcoholism is one of the slowest though most certain forms of suicide."
-Errol Flynn, p. 345
"Alcohol is a far greater killer than all opiates. You can buy alcohol on any street corner throughout the world. It gets your brain, your liver. It destroys your morals, destroys your vitality, kills the sexual potential, and you become sluggish. It is a great pity that Prohibition failed...As one of the heartiest drinkers in the world, I speak with a voice of authority."
-Errol Flynn, 1952, p. 409
I preach against alcohol. I have seen it ruin too many families, marriages, and relationships to be kind to it. Flynn, although a lover of alcohol (especially later in his life), often spoke against its stranglehold and effects it has on a person. As noted in the quote above, he wished that Prohibition had succeeded. He truly was addicted to the stuff.
In one part of the book, Flynn notes how he fell in love with the painting "The Man Is at Sea" by Vincent Van Gogh. He eventually acquired it and shares how the picture was emotional to him because of its reality and symbolism. He then goes on to draw a sad personal note re: the symbolism in the painting:
"I too had been at sea in my youth, in one way, and destined to be at sea intermittently ever afterward. I was also at sea in my effort to find out what things mean. I am still at sea."
-Errol Flynn, p.307
His quote reminds me of the verse the publishers left off quoting on the first page of the book. They quoted Isaiah 57:21. They would have done well to quote verse twenty also.
"But the wicked are like the troubled sea, when it cannot rest, whose waters cast up mire and dirt."
-Isaiah 57:20
Truly Errol Flynn lived a life of wickedness which resulted in a life of trouble and unrest. A life with no rest.
There is an anecdote in the book after Flynn's well-publicized rape trial in Los Angeles in which he describes his philosophy of life. Today, this philosophy has been described as YOLO - You Only Live Once. I quote Flynn here:
"For what went on trial, there in the Los Angeles Courthouse, was my personality and above all my way of life. Certainly, it was a much more complicated thing than has ever been presented by the press, the magazine writers, the clowns who joke about me on radio and television, and the fellows around saloons who tell salacious stories.
Bear in mind that at this time although married, I was technically a bachelor, a man living alone. I had no evil practices. I did no one any injury. I wasn't even drinking much. I would have champagne around and if people wanted it they could have it, and I'd take a bit with them, but that was it. I was thirty-four, in my prime; women liked me, I liked them; nobody got hurt. I thought, Let's have fun, let's live by the sunshine, let's swim and play; let's make love, let's cruise in the Pacific, let's have pleasant parties, gay chatter,; let's work, let's make pictures, let's entertain the people, let's be artists, if we can.
This was my balls, my way of living, breathing and exulting in this short swift act called Creation. Am I supposed to live as other people? Are they supposed to do what I do? Do I have to be made made over into their image, and they into mine?
...in brief, I like people. I like to enjoy the thrill of living every day, every hour of the day, for we are here only this once, and let's feel the wind while we may."
-Errol Flynn, pp. 321-322
Essentially, Flynn's philosophy was "Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die." Many before him have lived this way, many after him, and many do today. What a shortsighted view of life! God's Word tells us something completely different. We have this life and then eternity to look forward to (or to be afraid of) depending upon the final judgment:
"And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment;"
-Hebrews 9:27
I submit to you that there is a much better philosophy of life to follow than the one that Flynn lived out. Jesus summed it up two thousands years ago in the gospel of John:
"The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly."
-Jesus in John 10:10
The very last section of the book (approximately 100 pages) begins with a blank page with a squarish question mark on it. In this last section, we see the author wrestle with the questions of life. I appreciate his audacious honesty in describing the questions and mysteries that had eluded him thus far in life.
One day I called my valet. "Alexandre," I said, "I want you to put this monogram on each of my suits underneath the handkerchief pocket."
"Why"" he asked.
"That is a good question," I said. "Why? That is what I want to know and I can't find out why. So I want this monogram sewed unto onto all of my suits."
I had drawn a squarish question mark...
?
This, my own confusion, became my trademark. My own questioning of myself. Why? How does a man become what he becomes? Whom does he become? I do not know. I didn't know then.
But it pressed on my thinking so much that I felt I must carry this symbolism to gratify my own curiosity or torment, or to make people think.
I still wear a question mark beneath my handkerchief pocket on all of my suits. I am still wondering why.
-Errol Flynn, p.342
It's not often that you find the honesty of a man who (although he might not have known it) was near the end of his life. Speaking of life, in this same section of the book, he speaks about being at the pinnacle of the world, and yet it was nothing.
"There I was, sitting on top of the world. I had wealth, friends, I was internationally known, I was sought after by women. I could have anything that money could buy. Yet I found at the top of the world there was nothing."
-Errol Flynn, p. 348
In the gospel of Mark, Jesus speaks to this regard:
"For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?"
-Jesus, in Mark 8:36
Although toward the end of his days (remember, he only lived to be fifty years old due to his lifestyle), he was not about to change or to listen to anyone else regarding how to live his life. Notice his philosophy from some diary entries listed in the book five years before his death:
"I am in my mid-forties. They say I am a sight to behold, compared with my looks a few years back...it seems absurd, ridiculous and laughable that somebody should tell me how to behave during my brief span here on this earth. I feel like rebelling every time I think of it. A rough, bemused, rugged individualist, I was born this way and that is the way I will die. I have no clear-cut system of philosophy. I want none. I want no design for living. I want no one to tell me how to live. I will take it from day to day. I follow no leaders, no set of rules, and don't anyone lay down rules for me."
-Errol Flynn, 1954, p.413
This philosophy saddened me. The reason it saddened me is that the end of this philosophy is not a good end. Flynn's life and early death proved his statement completely. Life to him was a conundrum...something that could not be figured out. And he sure wasn't going to listen to anyone - God, government, parents, friends, wives, etc - telling him how to live his life. Reminds me of a particular verse from the wise man in the book of Proverbs:
"There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death."
-Solomon, Proverbs 14:12
Toward the very end of the book, Flynn quotes some frank diary entries. We get to glimpse into the mind of this tortured soul. I think you will agree with me that he truly was a tortured soul from some of the lines he writes:
"I have a zest for living yet twice an urge to die...
The pursuit of gold, pleasure, and danger motivate most of my springs...
I want faith and am faithless...
I love myself and hate myself...
I want to be loved but I may myself be incapable of really loving...
I laugh a lot, and I weep secretly more often than most men."
-Errol Flynn, p.416-417
On the last few pages of the book, Flynn boils down his thoughts wistfully and puts them to the page. You can judge him yourself if this is the writing of a happy, peaceful man:
"I am living with this brand - even relatively happily - but I wish it hadn't happened. I do not know whether I have conveyed it - or tried not to convey it - but I have been cut by my own sword so deeply that I am ready for whatever befalls. Flynn is not always In. Sometimes he is far far out - at the bottom of the chasm, at the bottom of the cleft...
I am unable to understand myself. Still not knowing who I am. Still hunting for my soul."
-Errol Flynn, p.437
In the 37th chapter of Psalms, David gives testimony as an older man. He contrasts the righteous man in verse 25-26 with that of the evil men he has seen in verses 35-36. He then tells us the man to watch...to pattern our life after...to learn from:
"I have seen the wicked in great power, and spreading himself like a green bay tree. Yet he passed away, and, lo, he was not: yea, I sought him, but he could not be found. Mark the perfect man, and behold the upright: for the end of that man is peace."
-Psalm 37:35-37
My childhood screen hero is not a role model. Not one single bit. In fact, his life is a warning to each and every one of us. Live your own life and you will pay the consequences. If you don't believe me, just read again the author's own words that I have quoted verbatim.
Yes, the wise man rings true regarding the way of the transgressor (the wicked):
"...the way of transgressors is hard."
-Proverbs 13:15b
September 15, 2017
No cabe duda que Errol Flynn era todo un auténtico aventurero, y esta autobiografía suya lo demuestra con creces ,ya que, evidentemente ,todo lo que se pueda decir, haber escuchado antes o leído sobre esta estrella de los años dorados de Hollywood se quedan muy corta al adentrarse en su autobiografía. Dotada del mismo carisma que él, escrita con ironía a la par que un descarado y sinceridad (e incluso cierta Fantasía exageradora..quién sabe) escandalosa, resulta totalmente mágica y adictiva en su lectura, pese a ser una persona de instintos amorales y peculiares principios, en ocasiones. No deja de ser sorprendente que su figura sea tan carismática y su simpatía no se deteriore tras ello. Así comprobamos, mediante su lectura, que no solo en la pantalla o en presencia seducía; es algo que traspasa. La esencia de un encanto irresistible que brilla en su escritura, que es parte de su personalidad: un ser totalmente magnético, atrayente y atractivo. Irresistible a todas luces.
Y a las pruebas me remito, porque leyendo esta magnífica obra de sus memorias desde tan temprana edad, su leyenda oída durante años se queda corta al auto retratar una vida repletas de aventuras y desventuras; demasiadas para tan corto periplo vital, un ser creado a sí mismo mediante prueba y error, y vuelta a la carretera y al mismo experimento. Sediento de la esencia de su propio camino, dudoso y muchas veces poco ético, pero igualmente espectacular y tantas veces rocambolesco. Sus historias en la pantalla no le llegan a los talones.
Unos claros ejemplos: ya a los siete años se marcha casi una semana a intentar trabajar como jornalero de campo, tras una de sus numerosas y acaloradas discusiones con su progenitora ( que según él albergaba el gusto por los mismos placeres), y antes de cumplir la veintena, llega a ser mendigo en varias ocasiones, trabajador de una fábrica de sellos, oliendo botellas por si contienen queroseno en otra, se marcha a Nueva Guinea y trabaja como Cadete sanitario, capataz de una plantación de cocos, desboñigador de Ovejas, Peón de un pozo minero, pescador con dinamita en alta mar, y incluso, llega a ser acusado y encarcelado por un crimen en una trifulca con las tribus locales, cuando buscaba Oro. Todo eso, antes de llegar a Hollywood. Entre medio está el lío de las faldas, siempre perpetuo a lo largo de su vida, que la mayoría de las veces le ha hecho entrar en conflictos de mayor o menor peligro, y otras tantas de ha ayudado a salir de uno de su múltiples atolladeros vitales.
Y si para éstas alturas no se ha apagado la sed de diversión por parte del lector..ávido de ver qué le depara próximamente y riza el rizo, hay un pasaje que hará las delicias de todos, por su rubrica rocambolesca, previo a su aterrizaje en Europa, formación en los teatros de Inglaterra y contratación para la meca del celuloide, en el que cual se ‘embarca’ por una ruta que le lleva como año y medio de aventuras, juergas, trapicheos y contiendas peligrosas junto a un amigo médico.
Llegados a éste punto de la obra, el tono puramente alegre de los primeros pasajes, pese a sus complicada y trotada vida a tan temprana edad, se torna en jocosidad inapetente, inercia y estado de rutina y hastío. Los que esperen mucho del pasaje central que dedica a su estrellato y años en Hollywood, quizá se defrauden. Flynn no era un actor o estrella al uso, convencional ( y bien se puede comprobar leyéndole..creedme). Lo que para algunos pudiera ser relevante:...’hice éste film así, me preparé asa...compartí escena con..que ensayaba con la técnica tal..se filmó en.., para él es irrelevante, pues lo que desea resaltar es su encontronazo fallido con su primer matrimonio y relación tormentosa, así cómo los oportunismos propios y ajenos, los directores crueles, el maltrato animal en la industria visual y la poca importancia para los magnates del dinero al escuchar a un ser que intentó ser sofisticado, creativamente hablando, y su no oportunidad de un papel que se extrapole al de aventurero y / o espadachín; su frustración, la cual saldaba con sus numerosas juergas en su hogar de Mulholland, además de sus aventuras en alta mar o bajo éste. Y, sobretodo, la renta personal que sacó de su explotación impersonalizada en sus años dorados. También hay cabida para anécdotas cinematográficas, pero todas personales y de entidad negativa, revestidas con su característica ironía. Como excepción, se divirtió y entusiasmó en un par de films (cuando no estaba Jack Warner de por medio ni su odiado Curtiz), e incluso aportó su granito de arena a la causa. Ahí queda todo. Lo dicho, un tipo no convencional o blanco de cara a la galería en el Hollywood del estrellato.
Tanto en la anterior, como en su siguiente y última parte: ‘Cazadores de cabezas de Hollywood’ y ‘????’, Flynn, narrativamente hablando, discurre por la senda de los claros oscuros in crecendo; (sin dejar su tono jocoso e irónico) como los característicos matices ocres de su adorado Van Gogh. Aquí detalla exhaustivamente todo el proceso, fondo, y consecuencias, sobretodo en el plano personal, que acarreó su acusación de violación estatutaria. Fue un antes y un después en su vida, un punto y aparte de inflexión. Sabe hacer crítica y auto critica de él y todos. Se sentía un ser utilizado por los estudios, las mujeres, la prensa y hasta los cómicos, de los cuales era un recurrente en aquellos años. Hastiado de su encasillamiento y el mundo vacuo de la cinematografía, relata amargamente su soledad y aislamiento, pese a estar ‘aparentemente’ en la cúspide. Las apariencias engañan, y él era un engaño a medias..ni tanto ni tan clavo, como suele decirse; todos tenemos nuestro sentir y pesares, no somos sólo una cara por entero. La del conquistador, juerguista y ‘espadachín’ de primera le vino bien a los productores que se lucraron de su fama. Él se tenía por otro:
“sólo yo sabía lo profunda que era mi herida. Yo les gustaba por lo que aparentaba ser”.
Su deterioro y decadencia personal era obvio, y en parte lo agradecía, harto de su etiqueta:
“Me gustaría tener una fachada detrás de la fachada, y por ello mi cara me disgusta especialmente. Nunca me ha gustado, ni siquiera cuando era bonita, sólo me gustaba lo que quería pensar que había detrás de ella [...] siempre he pensado que mi cara y mi aspecto no reflejaban al ser real, que mi cara la ensombrecía[...]. El curioso que había en mí recorrió el mundo en busca de respuestas de la vida; pero mi cara se interpuso en el camino”
Aún no había encontrado su quimera particular...y la buscaba, pese a su experiencia, en los mismos pastos que le han desgraciado tanto: aventuras, mujeres, riesgos...su desgracia fue él mismo, a la postre. Con todo, intentó disfrutar y contemplar su auto retiro, sacar lo máximo de su última etapa vital..era un soñador – despierto y empírico empedernido.
Así pues, una autobiografía genuinamente cautivadora, que embriaga y atrapa desde la primera página hasta la ultima por su alta, tremendamente divertida, dosis de descaro, aventura, confesión a la vez que radiografía sabia, reflexiva y sin tapujos de un ejemplar de persona casi único, que hace palidecer a todos sus personajes en la gran pantalla, en la que también exorciza sus demonios particulares, mostrándonos su dimensión real. Un alma filosófica lastrada, saciada, de modo incorrecto mediante su inagotable sed de aventuras, su curiosidad en búsqueda de su yo y su designio en la vida.
Mi máxima nota, como no, y un imprescindible para tanto los que desean pasarlo en grande con un libro de mil y una aventuras a la par que acabar de constatar el carisma irreverente del seductor por excelencia, pero también el de una persona sensible, reflexiva, auto cultivada y creada a si misma:
“Yo soy un hombre al que le gusta la compañía de las mujeres. Siempre me ha gustado y siempre me gustará. Pero también me gusta estar con gente maravillosa, gente alegre de los dos sexos. Sobretodo me gusta estar con jóvenes, para que me recuerden que la vida se renueva constantemente. Me gusta la gente, en suma. Me gusta disfrutar la emoción de vivir cada día, cada hora del día, porque sólo estamos aquí una vez, y vamos a sentir el viento mientras podamos”
Y a las pruebas me remito, porque leyendo esta magnífica obra de sus memorias desde tan temprana edad, su leyenda oída durante años se queda corta al auto retratar una vida repletas de aventuras y desventuras; demasiadas para tan corto periplo vital, un ser creado a sí mismo mediante prueba y error, y vuelta a la carretera y al mismo experimento. Sediento de la esencia de su propio camino, dudoso y muchas veces poco ético, pero igualmente espectacular y tantas veces rocambolesco. Sus historias en la pantalla no le llegan a los talones.
Unos claros ejemplos: ya a los siete años se marcha casi una semana a intentar trabajar como jornalero de campo, tras una de sus numerosas y acaloradas discusiones con su progenitora ( que según él albergaba el gusto por los mismos placeres), y antes de cumplir la veintena, llega a ser mendigo en varias ocasiones, trabajador de una fábrica de sellos, oliendo botellas por si contienen queroseno en otra, se marcha a Nueva Guinea y trabaja como Cadete sanitario, capataz de una plantación de cocos, desboñigador de Ovejas, Peón de un pozo minero, pescador con dinamita en alta mar, y incluso, llega a ser acusado y encarcelado por un crimen en una trifulca con las tribus locales, cuando buscaba Oro. Todo eso, antes de llegar a Hollywood. Entre medio está el lío de las faldas, siempre perpetuo a lo largo de su vida, que la mayoría de las veces le ha hecho entrar en conflictos de mayor o menor peligro, y otras tantas de ha ayudado a salir de uno de su múltiples atolladeros vitales.
Y si para éstas alturas no se ha apagado la sed de diversión por parte del lector..ávido de ver qué le depara próximamente y riza el rizo, hay un pasaje que hará las delicias de todos, por su rubrica rocambolesca, previo a su aterrizaje en Europa, formación en los teatros de Inglaterra y contratación para la meca del celuloide, en el que cual se ‘embarca’ por una ruta que le lleva como año y medio de aventuras, juergas, trapicheos y contiendas peligrosas junto a un amigo médico.
Llegados a éste punto de la obra, el tono puramente alegre de los primeros pasajes, pese a sus complicada y trotada vida a tan temprana edad, se torna en jocosidad inapetente, inercia y estado de rutina y hastío. Los que esperen mucho del pasaje central que dedica a su estrellato y años en Hollywood, quizá se defrauden. Flynn no era un actor o estrella al uso, convencional ( y bien se puede comprobar leyéndole..creedme). Lo que para algunos pudiera ser relevante:...’hice éste film así, me preparé asa...compartí escena con..que ensayaba con la técnica tal..se filmó en.., para él es irrelevante, pues lo que desea resaltar es su encontronazo fallido con su primer matrimonio y relación tormentosa, así cómo los oportunismos propios y ajenos, los directores crueles, el maltrato animal en la industria visual y la poca importancia para los magnates del dinero al escuchar a un ser que intentó ser sofisticado, creativamente hablando, y su no oportunidad de un papel que se extrapole al de aventurero y / o espadachín; su frustración, la cual saldaba con sus numerosas juergas en su hogar de Mulholland, además de sus aventuras en alta mar o bajo éste. Y, sobretodo, la renta personal que sacó de su explotación impersonalizada en sus años dorados. También hay cabida para anécdotas cinematográficas, pero todas personales y de entidad negativa, revestidas con su característica ironía. Como excepción, se divirtió y entusiasmó en un par de films (cuando no estaba Jack Warner de por medio ni su odiado Curtiz), e incluso aportó su granito de arena a la causa. Ahí queda todo. Lo dicho, un tipo no convencional o blanco de cara a la galería en el Hollywood del estrellato.
Tanto en la anterior, como en su siguiente y última parte: ‘Cazadores de cabezas de Hollywood’ y ‘????’, Flynn, narrativamente hablando, discurre por la senda de los claros oscuros in crecendo; (sin dejar su tono jocoso e irónico) como los característicos matices ocres de su adorado Van Gogh. Aquí detalla exhaustivamente todo el proceso, fondo, y consecuencias, sobretodo en el plano personal, que acarreó su acusación de violación estatutaria. Fue un antes y un después en su vida, un punto y aparte de inflexión. Sabe hacer crítica y auto critica de él y todos. Se sentía un ser utilizado por los estudios, las mujeres, la prensa y hasta los cómicos, de los cuales era un recurrente en aquellos años. Hastiado de su encasillamiento y el mundo vacuo de la cinematografía, relata amargamente su soledad y aislamiento, pese a estar ‘aparentemente’ en la cúspide. Las apariencias engañan, y él era un engaño a medias..ni tanto ni tan clavo, como suele decirse; todos tenemos nuestro sentir y pesares, no somos sólo una cara por entero. La del conquistador, juerguista y ‘espadachín’ de primera le vino bien a los productores que se lucraron de su fama. Él se tenía por otro:
“sólo yo sabía lo profunda que era mi herida. Yo les gustaba por lo que aparentaba ser”.
Su deterioro y decadencia personal era obvio, y en parte lo agradecía, harto de su etiqueta:
“Me gustaría tener una fachada detrás de la fachada, y por ello mi cara me disgusta especialmente. Nunca me ha gustado, ni siquiera cuando era bonita, sólo me gustaba lo que quería pensar que había detrás de ella [...] siempre he pensado que mi cara y mi aspecto no reflejaban al ser real, que mi cara la ensombrecía[...]. El curioso que había en mí recorrió el mundo en busca de respuestas de la vida; pero mi cara se interpuso en el camino”
Aún no había encontrado su quimera particular...y la buscaba, pese a su experiencia, en los mismos pastos que le han desgraciado tanto: aventuras, mujeres, riesgos...su desgracia fue él mismo, a la postre. Con todo, intentó disfrutar y contemplar su auto retiro, sacar lo máximo de su última etapa vital..era un soñador – despierto y empírico empedernido.
Así pues, una autobiografía genuinamente cautivadora, que embriaga y atrapa desde la primera página hasta la ultima por su alta, tremendamente divertida, dosis de descaro, aventura, confesión a la vez que radiografía sabia, reflexiva y sin tapujos de un ejemplar de persona casi único, que hace palidecer a todos sus personajes en la gran pantalla, en la que también exorciza sus demonios particulares, mostrándonos su dimensión real. Un alma filosófica lastrada, saciada, de modo incorrecto mediante su inagotable sed de aventuras, su curiosidad en búsqueda de su yo y su designio en la vida.
Mi máxima nota, como no, y un imprescindible para tanto los que desean pasarlo en grande con un libro de mil y una aventuras a la par que acabar de constatar el carisma irreverente del seductor por excelencia, pero también el de una persona sensible, reflexiva, auto cultivada y creada a si misma:
“Yo soy un hombre al que le gusta la compañía de las mujeres. Siempre me ha gustado y siempre me gustará. Pero también me gusta estar con gente maravillosa, gente alegre de los dos sexos. Sobretodo me gusta estar con jóvenes, para que me recuerden que la vida se renueva constantemente. Me gusta la gente, en suma. Me gusta disfrutar la emoción de vivir cada día, cada hora del día, porque sólo estamos aquí una vez, y vamos a sentir el viento mientras podamos”
September 17, 2010
absolute and unfettered entertainment from start to finish. i cannot recommend this book highly enough. i now have to read the motley crew autobiography to see if it can possibly compare. like a real showman, errol flynn gives you everything you want and none of what you don't. the outrageous-anecdote-to-page ratio runs about 1:1 all the way through. among some that will stick in my head- the final gag with john barrymore, the private steamboat cruise up the mississippi, the spanish teeth that nearly cost flynn his arm, the female slave(s) in new guinea, the ammonia up the crocodile's ass trick, and of course errol's brief dabbling into sheep castration (about that last one, i'll just say that before he became famous for sweet-talking women into bed with him, he employed his mouth in other endeavors)
March 21, 2024
Errol Flynn was dashing and daring as an actor and that's all I had known him for in my youth. I read this book, knowing that he had been a rake and thinking that I could also become a rake if I were given the chance. Having just come out of active duty in the Army, I thought maybe being a rake wasn't a bad idea. Well, after reading Wicked, Wicked Ways I could never be the rake that Flynn was. He was bold and irresistible. This was the first biographical work I had ever read about a Hollywood star, and it's a pleasurable habit I have never gotten rid of. Flynn, Cooper, Mitchum, Brando, Dean, Stewart, et al are very interesting people who knew interesting people, and this book is worth the read.
April 11, 2022
My favorite fictional book.
We’re thrown in to a world that forces its version of truth upon us and it is for us to get the meaning in a meaningless world. Flynn is an avid agnostic and the world happens to him as he realizes the meaninglessness of life except for our own experiences and the fleeting understandings we grasp from time to time.
The world of Flynn is the world where George Armstrong Custer is a hero for killing native Americans (Indians in the language of the time period), only white people are acknowledged as people, and myths define our reality and their myths are as real to them as our myths are real to us.
Flynn had an uneasy relationship with dogs. He loved them but four times they needlessly died under his watch. The first was his grandfathers’ dog he throws into the fire, the next was his dog that was poisoned from noxious plants in New Guinea, the next his beloved dog that fell off his ship, the last his puppy that he ran over when he was in a fit of rage. Yes, he loved his dogs, but sometimes love is not rational and it takes more than love to exist properly.
The musings in this book show a depth of insight that I’ve never read elsewhere. This book has been my favorite book for most of my life. There is a wisdom in it unlike any other book I’ve read. I don’t like to recommend it to others because the morally repugnant pervades Flynn’s life story.
For me, there is depth to this book that breaks the mode of all other books. It’s within this book and I love this book for that reason. Flynn does see the whole absurdness of life and understands at a non-superficial level from time to time and relates those thoughts as he tells his fantastic stories.
We’re thrown in to a world that forces its version of truth upon us and it is for us to get the meaning in a meaningless world. Flynn is an avid agnostic and the world happens to him as he realizes the meaninglessness of life except for our own experiences and the fleeting understandings we grasp from time to time.
The world of Flynn is the world where George Armstrong Custer is a hero for killing native Americans (Indians in the language of the time period), only white people are acknowledged as people, and myths define our reality and their myths are as real to them as our myths are real to us.
Flynn had an uneasy relationship with dogs. He loved them but four times they needlessly died under his watch. The first was his grandfathers’ dog he throws into the fire, the next was his dog that was poisoned from noxious plants in New Guinea, the next his beloved dog that fell off his ship, the last his puppy that he ran over when he was in a fit of rage. Yes, he loved his dogs, but sometimes love is not rational and it takes more than love to exist properly.
The musings in this book show a depth of insight that I’ve never read elsewhere. This book has been my favorite book for most of my life. There is a wisdom in it unlike any other book I’ve read. I don’t like to recommend it to others because the morally repugnant pervades Flynn’s life story.
For me, there is depth to this book that breaks the mode of all other books. It’s within this book and I love this book for that reason. Flynn does see the whole absurdness of life and understands at a non-superficial level from time to time and relates those thoughts as he tells his fantastic stories.
December 24, 2015
Hard to know what to say. I found him pretty repugnant & shallow. Even before his discovery & fame & great success in Hollywood he was clearly a ne'er do well & pretty much a bum and a low life. He had a lousy & adversarial relationship with his mother which probably explains a lot as far as his behavior toward (& relationships with) women. I couldn't find any redeeming qualities; his beauty really was only skin deep. I'm thinking of another Lothario, David Niven, who was at least amusing & charming when recounting his "escapades". Errol is neither. It appears he had little business sense or judgment either and in the end karma caught up with him as he self destructed with booze & a disastrous attempt at producing & starring in his own movie after he fell out with Hollywood.
February 21, 2017
Errol was an adventurer first and a movie star second. He was an unconventional, unique rebel easily bored and frustrated with normal behaviour which he found almost impossible to keep up. Hollywood managed to corral him for a while but only for a while. Thank goodness they did because now we have the films to watch. Compared to the dash and flash of his Robin Hood and Captain Blood the leading men of today simply pale into insignificance.
September 28, 2024
Thanks to Errol Flynn's honesty, this is an entertaining and thorough recount of his adventurous life, surprisingly similar to the Captain Blood character he played on the silver screen.
A tragic story about a child who disappointed his parents to the point of exile, he then continues to drift across the planet until he reaches America and proceeded to scandalise the United States. Even in his indisputable success, contradiction followed him: he had everything and nothing; he had many loves but questioned if he ever had love, or could ever love; he felt isolated but yearned to be free.
Flynn speaks of what is dearest to him: his search for truth, like the true son of a scientist he was, and his lost dream of becoming a great writer like Hemmingway. In his memoirs, he proves his own ability to write with such astute observations while revealing a soul in strife, searching for where it belongs, which he discovers is on the ever changing seas.
The middle to end of the book becomes a bit lifeless with name dropping and disjointed incidences or anecdotes which are still entertaining but you undoubtedly feel the tedious repetition of his extravagant life. He seems ready to drift to the next port, like he did in his homeless and penniless teens, but money poisons him into stupefied stagnation and he ends up escaping with drink and rebellious living.
This could easily have been a book about his exploits and debauchery like Casanova's memoirs, but instead, Errol Flynn shares with us his values and an artfully concealed, introverted personality, which was usually hidden behind an entertaining facade much like the title of this book. In fact, there is much to hide since at his core he has hidden depth you wouldn't expect from such a fast-flowing life. This book is a gripping and quick-paced reflection of his adventures.
In its essence, Errol Flynn is The real Old Man and the Sea.
While reading this, I couldn't help consider how living without limits can lead to such confusion and sadness. This biography is a tragic parable of an exceptional person who was a true adventurer living in a rich life of highs and lows, which most of us could never imagine let alone endure.
* * *
My favourite quotes:
"curiosity is a sickness. It gets me into all my troubles"
"we have pornographic appeal in all our art structures - all adding up to a very dubious morality."
"The man who for a woman fits the bill is the one who pays the bill... I am just saying that in the war between the sexes dollar bills change hands."
"In the theatre the play's the thing - in real life the thing is the play."
"There is only one aphrodisiac - the special woman you love to touch and see and smell and crush."
"I have always carried with me two false noses. They alter my appearance so that I can sit down and read a newspaper anywhere and be unrecognisable."
"Flynn, who had been in the Court of St James, the courts of California, the courts of love, the tennis courts, and courtesans."
"If you love someone, you will love him enough to want to see him free and unfettered."
"the feeling that you own someone grows out of the whole archaic, priest-ridden concept of monogamy."
"It is not man's natural state to be monogamous. Neither is it woman's[...] If this weren't true, so much of our modern literature and movie entertainment wouldn't be given over to dealing with this theme and this condition."
"If anyone should ask, "What do two actors talk about when they meet?" the answer is, "Themselves."
"Man's indecency to man all over the world rules out the idea of humanity as an actuality. It is a dream of young idealists. In practice it is a misnomer. Man is at man's throat, as in the sea the fish swallow one another."
"My greatest addiction: Not drink, not drugs, not sex. It is curiosity"
"My greatest fear: The fear of mediocrity [...] It is what has impelled me to challenge anything I recognised as terrifying to me."
"I know that my so-called fame or fortune is truly a matter of luck"
"I recognise that while I might be mediocre to myself, that I have done the best I could about it."
"Is woman a universal creature? Does a man take all women to bed when he takes one to bed? I question straight from the boudoir: Has every oyster a different taste?"
"You can love every instant of living and still want to be dead. I know this feeling often."
"Tell me of paradox. Is there not some percentage of woman in each man, and some man in each woman, and if so, is this not contradiction and is it not true?"
"I feel that I am inwardly serious, thoughtful, even tormented, but in practice I yield to the fatuous, the nonsensical."
"I allow myself to be understood abroad as a colourful fragment in a drab world."
"Women do not let me stay single. I do not let myself stay married."
"I laugh a lot, and I weep secretly more often than most men."
"It is a mistake to think you can't be hurt if you don't care."
"The greatest city: Paris. Because of the sense of freedom."
"I have never found a substitute for [the] kind of creativity and re-creativity that I know the rambling reflective pianist to be able to enjoy."
"I am convinced of the validity of contradiction. There are many worlds. Each is true, at its time, in its own fashion."
* * *
My favourite parts (SPOILERS):
His "first time", worth being immortalised:
I was a tall, skinny boy [...] I started to make a reconnaissance of her leg. She kept on reading, as if I were doing nothing. The reconnaissance went higher - this going on for some time, till suddenly she blurted out, "How much do I owe you?"
"One shilling and ninepence," I said [...] "Come on," she said, leading the way to the bedroom. I followed, a little thunderstruck at my success. From then on I fumbled[...] But I caught the hang of it. "Oh Carrie!" I exclaimed. Suddenly she bounced into the air. "You damn little fool - you want me to have a baby?" That cancelled the one shilling and ninepence debt. There were no encores.
When he was a teen searching for gold in New Guinea:
I think now that the only gold I found in New Guinea was in these books, read at night by hurricane lamp in campongs, in bamboo huts, wherever I put up. When I rafted, rowed, sailed, there were books close by... I tried to get the things I never could discipline myself to absorb in the classroom. I felt a growth of power, a kind of certainty. I'd be able to talk of these men and their works if and when I met people who read them. I adopted the speech and the manners of the characters I read about, borrowing what seemed useful, for purposes of helping myself to grow up.
After getting caught with another man's wife (one of many occasions) on a ship:
"You'll have to get off the ship. Otherwise we can't be responsible for what this man does to you."
"Why doesn't he get off? He tried to shoot me."
"Yes, that's true, and we think he'd try it again. But after all he's paid two first-class passenger fares and you paid one."
The French are very practical people.
You can't argue against economics.
While visiting a polio benefit in Texas:
They rammed at me, pulling my ears, trying to kiss me - men and women both - my pockets looted or torn, or my shoelaces pulled off and my shoes removed. Everyone wanting a souvenir. A mob hysteria that made it hard for me to keep my dignity. All the time I wondered, Why? Because I had made some pictures, because I was freed of a rape charge? What the hell kind of national heroes do they have in this country?
On disappointed dreams:
It dawned on me now that I was beaten as a writer too. That dream had been shattered. I had chosen to be an actor to make big money, to become famous, and I had put by a deeper yearning to write. Had I made a mistake? Right now I admired the writers around Hollywood more than I did the actors. I had only added another stone to my pile of confusion. Nothing I dreamed of had matured.
On returning to his first theatre placement, which was in Northampton, England:
Then I said something that drew the top laugh of all. "The happiest days I have ever spent anywhere that I can recall in my life were spent here in Northampton." I didn't realise I was saying that to an audience of people who dreamed of getting away from the dreary place, an audience that went to the theatre to escape. I didn't realise they knew how much of the world I had seen and how odd my words must have sounded to them[...] So they laughed heartily and I joined them. It was wonderful, refreshing to be there again, even to see one or two old familiar faces backstage. I needed a lift very badly at that time, and I got it in the town where - as I told them truthfully - I had spent the happiest days of my life.
Port Antonio, March 1954 journal entry:
I am in my mid-forties. They say I am a sight to behold [...] It seems absurd, ridiculous and laughable that somebody should tell me how to behave during my brief span here on this earth. I feel like rebelling every time I think of it. A rough, bemused, rugged individualist, I was born this way and that is the way I will die. I have no clearcut system of philosophy. I want none. I want no design for living, I want no one to tell me how to live. I will take it from day to day. I follow no leaders, no set of rules, and don't anyone lay down rules for me.
On self reflection:
Personal defects: Probably my greatest defect is that of a habit of suddenly withdrawal, not in a very obvious way, from intimate relations with friends. I know this has aggravated many friends when I just pull out, withdraw and pull down my own personal shade. Then I develop a deep suspicion of any offer of friendship; perhaps it's a caustic and over-cynical appraisal of their motives in proffering friendship. At that time I have a nasty habit of trying to get at their true motives by the exploratory system, which sometimes takes the form of practical jokes.
More on self reflection:
Favourite occupation: A prolonged bout in the bedroom.
The greatest calamity: Castration.
What would I like to be at seventy? At seventy I confidently hope I will have had at least eight more wives, have grown a stomach that I can regard with respect, and can still walk upstairs to the bedroom without aching or groaning.
On being a contradiction:
I have a zest for living, yet twice an urge to die.
I have a genius for living, but I turn many things into crap.
I am dangerous to be with because, since I live dangerously, others are subject to the danger that I expose myself to. They, more likely than I, will get hurt.
I will do a great deal for a buck; then when I get it I will throw it away, or let it be taken from me.
I am very tough, but also I am a patsy.
The pursuit of gold, pleasure and danger motivate most of my springs.
I am alternately very kind, very cruel.
I love art, but finance may be my forte.
I look for causes, and they wind up with me a romp.
I love and hate myself.
I want to be loved but I may myself be incapable of really loving.
I hate the legend of myself as phallic representation, yet I work at it to keep it alive.
I despise mediocrity above all things. I fear it, yet I know some of my performances have been mediocre.
I generally deny that I was ever a good actor, but I know I have turned in a half-dozen good performances.
I call myself a bum, but I have been working hard most of the days of my adult life.
A tragic story about a child who disappointed his parents to the point of exile, he then continues to drift across the planet until he reaches America and proceeded to scandalise the United States. Even in his indisputable success, contradiction followed him: he had everything and nothing; he had many loves but questioned if he ever had love, or could ever love; he felt isolated but yearned to be free.
Flynn speaks of what is dearest to him: his search for truth, like the true son of a scientist he was, and his lost dream of becoming a great writer like Hemmingway. In his memoirs, he proves his own ability to write with such astute observations while revealing a soul in strife, searching for where it belongs, which he discovers is on the ever changing seas.
The middle to end of the book becomes a bit lifeless with name dropping and disjointed incidences or anecdotes which are still entertaining but you undoubtedly feel the tedious repetition of his extravagant life. He seems ready to drift to the next port, like he did in his homeless and penniless teens, but money poisons him into stupefied stagnation and he ends up escaping with drink and rebellious living.
This could easily have been a book about his exploits and debauchery like Casanova's memoirs, but instead, Errol Flynn shares with us his values and an artfully concealed, introverted personality, which was usually hidden behind an entertaining facade much like the title of this book. In fact, there is much to hide since at his core he has hidden depth you wouldn't expect from such a fast-flowing life. This book is a gripping and quick-paced reflection of his adventures.
In its essence, Errol Flynn is The real Old Man and the Sea.
While reading this, I couldn't help consider how living without limits can lead to such confusion and sadness. This biography is a tragic parable of an exceptional person who was a true adventurer living in a rich life of highs and lows, which most of us could never imagine let alone endure.
* * *
My favourite quotes:
"curiosity is a sickness. It gets me into all my troubles"
"we have pornographic appeal in all our art structures - all adding up to a very dubious morality."
"The man who for a woman fits the bill is the one who pays the bill... I am just saying that in the war between the sexes dollar bills change hands."
"In the theatre the play's the thing - in real life the thing is the play."
"There is only one aphrodisiac - the special woman you love to touch and see and smell and crush."
"I have always carried with me two false noses. They alter my appearance so that I can sit down and read a newspaper anywhere and be unrecognisable."
"Flynn, who had been in the Court of St James, the courts of California, the courts of love, the tennis courts, and courtesans."
"If you love someone, you will love him enough to want to see him free and unfettered."
"the feeling that you own someone grows out of the whole archaic, priest-ridden concept of monogamy."
"It is not man's natural state to be monogamous. Neither is it woman's[...] If this weren't true, so much of our modern literature and movie entertainment wouldn't be given over to dealing with this theme and this condition."
"If anyone should ask, "What do two actors talk about when they meet?" the answer is, "Themselves."
"Man's indecency to man all over the world rules out the idea of humanity as an actuality. It is a dream of young idealists. In practice it is a misnomer. Man is at man's throat, as in the sea the fish swallow one another."
"My greatest addiction: Not drink, not drugs, not sex. It is curiosity"
"My greatest fear: The fear of mediocrity [...] It is what has impelled me to challenge anything I recognised as terrifying to me."
"I know that my so-called fame or fortune is truly a matter of luck"
"I recognise that while I might be mediocre to myself, that I have done the best I could about it."
"Is woman a universal creature? Does a man take all women to bed when he takes one to bed? I question straight from the boudoir: Has every oyster a different taste?"
"You can love every instant of living and still want to be dead. I know this feeling often."
"Tell me of paradox. Is there not some percentage of woman in each man, and some man in each woman, and if so, is this not contradiction and is it not true?"
"I feel that I am inwardly serious, thoughtful, even tormented, but in practice I yield to the fatuous, the nonsensical."
"I allow myself to be understood abroad as a colourful fragment in a drab world."
"Women do not let me stay single. I do not let myself stay married."
"I laugh a lot, and I weep secretly more often than most men."
"It is a mistake to think you can't be hurt if you don't care."
"The greatest city: Paris. Because of the sense of freedom."
"I have never found a substitute for [the] kind of creativity and re-creativity that I know the rambling reflective pianist to be able to enjoy."
"I am convinced of the validity of contradiction. There are many worlds. Each is true, at its time, in its own fashion."
* * *
My favourite parts (SPOILERS):
His "first time", worth being immortalised:
I was a tall, skinny boy [...] I started to make a reconnaissance of her leg. She kept on reading, as if I were doing nothing. The reconnaissance went higher - this going on for some time, till suddenly she blurted out, "How much do I owe you?"
"One shilling and ninepence," I said [...] "Come on," she said, leading the way to the bedroom. I followed, a little thunderstruck at my success. From then on I fumbled[...] But I caught the hang of it. "Oh Carrie!" I exclaimed. Suddenly she bounced into the air. "You damn little fool - you want me to have a baby?" That cancelled the one shilling and ninepence debt. There were no encores.
When he was a teen searching for gold in New Guinea:
I think now that the only gold I found in New Guinea was in these books, read at night by hurricane lamp in campongs, in bamboo huts, wherever I put up. When I rafted, rowed, sailed, there were books close by... I tried to get the things I never could discipline myself to absorb in the classroom. I felt a growth of power, a kind of certainty. I'd be able to talk of these men and their works if and when I met people who read them. I adopted the speech and the manners of the characters I read about, borrowing what seemed useful, for purposes of helping myself to grow up.
After getting caught with another man's wife (one of many occasions) on a ship:
"You'll have to get off the ship. Otherwise we can't be responsible for what this man does to you."
"Why doesn't he get off? He tried to shoot me."
"Yes, that's true, and we think he'd try it again. But after all he's paid two first-class passenger fares and you paid one."
The French are very practical people.
You can't argue against economics.
While visiting a polio benefit in Texas:
They rammed at me, pulling my ears, trying to kiss me - men and women both - my pockets looted or torn, or my shoelaces pulled off and my shoes removed. Everyone wanting a souvenir. A mob hysteria that made it hard for me to keep my dignity. All the time I wondered, Why? Because I had made some pictures, because I was freed of a rape charge? What the hell kind of national heroes do they have in this country?
On disappointed dreams:
It dawned on me now that I was beaten as a writer too. That dream had been shattered. I had chosen to be an actor to make big money, to become famous, and I had put by a deeper yearning to write. Had I made a mistake? Right now I admired the writers around Hollywood more than I did the actors. I had only added another stone to my pile of confusion. Nothing I dreamed of had matured.
On returning to his first theatre placement, which was in Northampton, England:
Then I said something that drew the top laugh of all. "The happiest days I have ever spent anywhere that I can recall in my life were spent here in Northampton." I didn't realise I was saying that to an audience of people who dreamed of getting away from the dreary place, an audience that went to the theatre to escape. I didn't realise they knew how much of the world I had seen and how odd my words must have sounded to them[...] So they laughed heartily and I joined them. It was wonderful, refreshing to be there again, even to see one or two old familiar faces backstage. I needed a lift very badly at that time, and I got it in the town where - as I told them truthfully - I had spent the happiest days of my life.
Port Antonio, March 1954 journal entry:
I am in my mid-forties. They say I am a sight to behold [...] It seems absurd, ridiculous and laughable that somebody should tell me how to behave during my brief span here on this earth. I feel like rebelling every time I think of it. A rough, bemused, rugged individualist, I was born this way and that is the way I will die. I have no clearcut system of philosophy. I want none. I want no design for living, I want no one to tell me how to live. I will take it from day to day. I follow no leaders, no set of rules, and don't anyone lay down rules for me.
On self reflection:
Personal defects: Probably my greatest defect is that of a habit of suddenly withdrawal, not in a very obvious way, from intimate relations with friends. I know this has aggravated many friends when I just pull out, withdraw and pull down my own personal shade. Then I develop a deep suspicion of any offer of friendship; perhaps it's a caustic and over-cynical appraisal of their motives in proffering friendship. At that time I have a nasty habit of trying to get at their true motives by the exploratory system, which sometimes takes the form of practical jokes.
More on self reflection:
Favourite occupation: A prolonged bout in the bedroom.
The greatest calamity: Castration.
What would I like to be at seventy? At seventy I confidently hope I will have had at least eight more wives, have grown a stomach that I can regard with respect, and can still walk upstairs to the bedroom without aching or groaning.
On being a contradiction:
I have a zest for living, yet twice an urge to die.
I have a genius for living, but I turn many things into crap.
I am dangerous to be with because, since I live dangerously, others are subject to the danger that I expose myself to. They, more likely than I, will get hurt.
I will do a great deal for a buck; then when I get it I will throw it away, or let it be taken from me.
I am very tough, but also I am a patsy.
The pursuit of gold, pleasure and danger motivate most of my springs.
I am alternately very kind, very cruel.
I love art, but finance may be my forte.
I look for causes, and they wind up with me a romp.
I love and hate myself.
I want to be loved but I may myself be incapable of really loving.
I hate the legend of myself as phallic representation, yet I work at it to keep it alive.
I despise mediocrity above all things. I fear it, yet I know some of my performances have been mediocre.
I generally deny that I was ever a good actor, but I know I have turned in a half-dozen good performances.
I call myself a bum, but I have been working hard most of the days of my adult life.
May 12, 2019
Whether chocked full of unfounded whimsy or genuine exploratory adventure (likely both), this book is entertaining from front to back. It reveals the complexities of a man many credit only as a sharp tongued, sword wielding, sex symbol. A man aware of his own contradictions, often accepting of such and just as often bewildered by the direction these contradictions took him through his experience called life. These experiences were varied, whether they be through seemingly (and at times humorously) directionless wandering about the furthest reaches of the earth or the surprisingly deep thoughts of a man of years, searching for meaning, depicting reality in an environment that regularly feels too extraordinary for such distinction.
As far as I can tell, it would have appeal to nearly anyone and everyone, regardless of their prior knowledge of Mr. Flynn.
As far as I can tell, it would have appeal to nearly anyone and everyone, regardless of their prior knowledge of Mr. Flynn.
January 22, 2020
I am really surprised how much I loved this book. Truth be told, if I've seen 2 of Errol Flynn's films it's a lot, typically because I was watching someone else (like Bette Davis), not Flynn. I think this may need to change....
In My Wicked, Wicked Ways, Errol Flynn peels away the Hollywood facade & bares himself, warts and all. He shows you his soul, if you look for it between those fantastical stories. In fact, by the time you turn the last page, you are sad the book is over & feel as though you are saying goodbye to a long lost friend. I can't remember the last time I've read such an no-holds-barred biography. How much of it is true? Who knows. But one thing you cannot deny: Errol Flynn grabbed life by the horns & squeezed every ounce out of it he could in his 50 short years on this planet.
In My Wicked, Wicked Ways, Errol Flynn peels away the Hollywood facade & bares himself, warts and all. He shows you his soul, if you look for it between those fantastical stories. In fact, by the time you turn the last page, you are sad the book is over & feel as though you are saying goodbye to a long lost friend. I can't remember the last time I've read such an no-holds-barred biography. How much of it is true? Who knows. But one thing you cannot deny: Errol Flynn grabbed life by the horns & squeezed every ounce out of it he could in his 50 short years on this planet.
June 15, 2022
Errol Flynn put the swash in swashbuckling. I don't think I've ever sat through the entirety of one of his movies, but this is one of those books that gets referenced when people discuss the history of Hollywood and is very much a book of two halves, his life pre and post Hollywood.
In the first -far better- section, Flynn covers his childhood in Tasmania and his various adventures in his late teens and early twenties. His dad was a distinguished Professor of Biology, but it seems like Flynn's talents lay elsewhere, principally in being extremely handsome, ridiculously lucky, and willing to try his hand at pretty much anything. Between the ages of 18 and 23 he moves between Australia and the Pacific islands to the north, his multitude of adventures including buying and captaining a boat to Papua New Guinea, then managing a tobacco plantation when he gets there.
He also moves between an assortment of females: one of them dies when her plane crashes into the side of a cliff and that pretty much sets the pattern for the rest of his insanely adventurous (or simply insane) life, in which he meets and beds a multitude of women. Ting Ling O'Connor, who introduces him to opium, gambling and much else in Hong Kong, and whom he later discovers -after she absconds with his cash and diamonds- to be both a thief and lady of the night, is my personal favourite, if for her name alone.
After some further adventures in South Asia he lights out for England and, in an unlikely but factual development, spends seven months learning to act at Northampton Rep. Within a year he was in LA, shortly after he was cast as Captain Blood, and within two years he was Warner Bros' biggest star.
All of this is tremendous fun, just as long as you take it with a pinch of salt: Flynn claims that he was expelled from grammar school for some sexual liaison with the school laundress, when in fact it was because of theft. When the United States joined the Second World War, he tried to enlist but was rejected for physical reasons, amongst which were various venereal diseases (this isn't mentioned in the book). Did Ting Ling exist, or did he have to invent her? And does it matter?
What does matter is the turn for the worse in his narrative after he arrives in the states and becomes a star. In 1942 he's accused of rape by two 17 year olds, gets off and -you can't make this stuff up- during the trial he hits on the girl running the cigarette counter at the courthouse:
"I craned my neck over the counter and saw that all was well. [...] Having decided to take things slowly - bear in mind this was in the middle of the double statutory rape trial- it took me about a week to advance the hand-kissing stage up her arm."
He's 35 and she's 20 and soon they're happily married, or as happily married as he could be:
"I got Nora a house in Hollywood. There she lived her life and I lived mine in Mulholland. This was the only way I would be married to anybody: separate house, separate lives, separate people."
This is still less dysfunctional than Flynn's first marriage, seven years of fights, recriminations and reunions with Lily Damita.
The rest of the book -and the life- is taken up with a succession of parties, two-way mirrors he has installed in his bachelor pad, the peepholes, the bugs planted in the ladies bathroom, the parties he throws where no-one comes, his mommy-issues, the drinking, the drugs and the loss of all the money: he was earning 200,00 per film at his peak, a lot even now, but an insane figure in the 30's and 40's.
In 1958 he dictates his autobiography to a ghost-writer but within a year he's dead, aged 59, before the book is even published. His heart gives out during a trip to Vancouver, attempting to see his boat to raise money, and in the company of his 17 year-old girlfriend. 'My Wicked, Wicked Ways' has never been out of print, the record of a life of two halves.
Sample quotes:
"Favourite occupation: A prolonged bout in the bedroom."
"When you are pursued that much, give in."
In the first -far better- section, Flynn covers his childhood in Tasmania and his various adventures in his late teens and early twenties. His dad was a distinguished Professor of Biology, but it seems like Flynn's talents lay elsewhere, principally in being extremely handsome, ridiculously lucky, and willing to try his hand at pretty much anything. Between the ages of 18 and 23 he moves between Australia and the Pacific islands to the north, his multitude of adventures including buying and captaining a boat to Papua New Guinea, then managing a tobacco plantation when he gets there.
He also moves between an assortment of females: one of them dies when her plane crashes into the side of a cliff and that pretty much sets the pattern for the rest of his insanely adventurous (or simply insane) life, in which he meets and beds a multitude of women. Ting Ling O'Connor, who introduces him to opium, gambling and much else in Hong Kong, and whom he later discovers -after she absconds with his cash and diamonds- to be both a thief and lady of the night, is my personal favourite, if for her name alone.
After some further adventures in South Asia he lights out for England and, in an unlikely but factual development, spends seven months learning to act at Northampton Rep. Within a year he was in LA, shortly after he was cast as Captain Blood, and within two years he was Warner Bros' biggest star.
All of this is tremendous fun, just as long as you take it with a pinch of salt: Flynn claims that he was expelled from grammar school for some sexual liaison with the school laundress, when in fact it was because of theft. When the United States joined the Second World War, he tried to enlist but was rejected for physical reasons, amongst which were various venereal diseases (this isn't mentioned in the book). Did Ting Ling exist, or did he have to invent her? And does it matter?
What does matter is the turn for the worse in his narrative after he arrives in the states and becomes a star. In 1942 he's accused of rape by two 17 year olds, gets off and -you can't make this stuff up- during the trial he hits on the girl running the cigarette counter at the courthouse:
"I craned my neck over the counter and saw that all was well. [...] Having decided to take things slowly - bear in mind this was in the middle of the double statutory rape trial- it took me about a week to advance the hand-kissing stage up her arm."
He's 35 and she's 20 and soon they're happily married, or as happily married as he could be:
"I got Nora a house in Hollywood. There she lived her life and I lived mine in Mulholland. This was the only way I would be married to anybody: separate house, separate lives, separate people."
This is still less dysfunctional than Flynn's first marriage, seven years of fights, recriminations and reunions with Lily Damita.
The rest of the book -and the life- is taken up with a succession of parties, two-way mirrors he has installed in his bachelor pad, the peepholes, the bugs planted in the ladies bathroom, the parties he throws where no-one comes, his mommy-issues, the drinking, the drugs and the loss of all the money: he was earning 200,00 per film at his peak, a lot even now, but an insane figure in the 30's and 40's.
In 1958 he dictates his autobiography to a ghost-writer but within a year he's dead, aged 59, before the book is even published. His heart gives out during a trip to Vancouver, attempting to see his boat to raise money, and in the company of his 17 year-old girlfriend. 'My Wicked, Wicked Ways' has never been out of print, the record of a life of two halves.
Sample quotes:
"Favourite occupation: A prolonged bout in the bedroom."
"When you are pursued that much, give in."
September 21, 2020
An unflinchingly honest account by Errol Flynn. He seemed to be a very unhappy person who was never inclined to help himself.
From a young age, Flynn had no respect for himself. Hence, he never (or rarely) had respect for anyone else. While Flynn had an unhappy childhood which prompted him to act out, at some point a person has to grow up and take responsibility. He never managed. Instead, he is quite content to drink his money away and blame others for his problems.
I appreciate his honesty, but the way he treats people grates. His questionable treatment of women is fairly well-known (and his reputation helped some less than honest people attempt to put the screws on him financially in court), but I'd like to offer one example which doesn't involve women: He never seems to feel remorse for partaking in the slave trade. How can someone sell people into servitude and not realize what they're doing is reprehensible? I never knew about this part of his life and I guess one must give him credit for exposing himself so fully, warts and all.
I was pleasantly surprised by his writing ability. Why, I'm not sure. He did pen a couple of novels, after all. The passages from his time as a young man in New Guinea read like an adventure novel. Surprisingly, the most interesting parts of the book were the times Errol Flynn spent in places other than Hollywood.
The book also gives insight into the old Hollywood system, giving a good account of how little say an actor had in the roles he played on screen and how hard they had to fight to receive a fair share of the monetary profits.
The ending of the novel is somewhat sad as Errol Flynn finally seems at peace, but the reader knows he dies a short time later.
The biggest negative (aside from his character) is the paltry amount of photographs in the book. Given the subject matter, I'd think the photographic section could have been much larger.
Errol Flynn was a better actor than he gave himself credit for. He must be since he is so likable onscreen while being such a dislikable character in real life. Though I don't much care for the real Errol Flynn, he is still my favorite actor.
From a young age, Flynn had no respect for himself. Hence, he never (or rarely) had respect for anyone else. While Flynn had an unhappy childhood which prompted him to act out, at some point a person has to grow up and take responsibility. He never managed. Instead, he is quite content to drink his money away and blame others for his problems.
I appreciate his honesty, but the way he treats people grates. His questionable treatment of women is fairly well-known (and his reputation helped some less than honest people attempt to put the screws on him financially in court), but I'd like to offer one example which doesn't involve women: He never seems to feel remorse for partaking in the slave trade. How can someone sell people into servitude and not realize what they're doing is reprehensible? I never knew about this part of his life and I guess one must give him credit for exposing himself so fully, warts and all.
I was pleasantly surprised by his writing ability. Why, I'm not sure. He did pen a couple of novels, after all. The passages from his time as a young man in New Guinea read like an adventure novel. Surprisingly, the most interesting parts of the book were the times Errol Flynn spent in places other than Hollywood.
The book also gives insight into the old Hollywood system, giving a good account of how little say an actor had in the roles he played on screen and how hard they had to fight to receive a fair share of the monetary profits.
The ending of the novel is somewhat sad as Errol Flynn finally seems at peace, but the reader knows he dies a short time later.
The biggest negative (aside from his character) is the paltry amount of photographs in the book. Given the subject matter, I'd think the photographic section could have been much larger.
Errol Flynn was a better actor than he gave himself credit for. He must be since he is so likable onscreen while being such a dislikable character in real life. Though I don't much care for the real Errol Flynn, he is still my favorite actor.
February 5, 2017
This is probably the most enjoyable book I've ever read. Really. Mr. Flynn tells us the story of a life filled with adventure, emotional intensity, and humor. He also manages to convey the grittiness and desperation of his life at times, but he tells all it with dignity and style.
He has the ability to to write so that you see it all, in your mind's eye, as if you were there right along with him. More importantly, as he takes you on his journey, he brings you to feel what he was feeling when it was happening to him.
Want to go a step further? You can really see Mandarin House, in Macau, China, where he gambled with a girl he met named Ting Ling. Just Google it. Want to see the hotel where Lili, his mad wife, threw a flower pot off the balcony at him on the street below? Google the Plaza Athenee, in Paris. It looks like a nice place, with wide balconies full of flower pots.
I especially liked the part in the book where as a young man, he meets his life long friend Hermann, and they go from New Guinea to London on cargo ships, trains, and anything that will get them closer to their destination. Along the way they get rich, and become penniless, over and over again.
Another thing that makes this book a joy to read is that Flynn is a man of consciences, who does unconscionable things to survive. He was able to adapt to the circumstances he found himself in very well.
He was a man who lived life without limits, but that takes a toll.
When he died at age fifty he had the body of an eighty year old.
So, who was Errol Flynn? He describes himself as a desperate and hard man doing what he had to, to get on. I'll take him at his word on that.
Read it.
He has the ability to to write so that you see it all, in your mind's eye, as if you were there right along with him. More importantly, as he takes you on his journey, he brings you to feel what he was feeling when it was happening to him.
Want to go a step further? You can really see Mandarin House, in Macau, China, where he gambled with a girl he met named Ting Ling. Just Google it. Want to see the hotel where Lili, his mad wife, threw a flower pot off the balcony at him on the street below? Google the Plaza Athenee, in Paris. It looks like a nice place, with wide balconies full of flower pots.
I especially liked the part in the book where as a young man, he meets his life long friend Hermann, and they go from New Guinea to London on cargo ships, trains, and anything that will get them closer to their destination. Along the way they get rich, and become penniless, over and over again.
Another thing that makes this book a joy to read is that Flynn is a man of consciences, who does unconscionable things to survive. He was able to adapt to the circumstances he found himself in very well.
He was a man who lived life without limits, but that takes a toll.
When he died at age fifty he had the body of an eighty year old.
So, who was Errol Flynn? He describes himself as a desperate and hard man doing what he had to, to get on. I'll take him at his word on that.
Read it.
August 2, 2008
With all the commotion about stars and starlets in the popular press today- it was refreshing to read about a real character. Although I have heard the wickedness admitted to in Errol's biography maybe exaggerated, by all measures it is more exciting that anything any actor or actress today could dream up. I thought the best part of this book was the first half- which covers Flynn's life up to his rise to popularity. After that- it becomes a sort of boo-hoo story of depression and desperation in the midst of amazing wealth, prosperity, fame, and sex- which really just pisses me off. On the other hand, the first half is a great collection of stories about a young man- a boy really- who can't sit still and openly seeks adventure. Since in those days we didn't medicate children with this kind of ambition, Errol was free to take off and seek this kind of life in New Guinea. Here is was a health official, a gold prospector, and captain of a ship, slave trader, hunter, guide, and overseer of a coconut farm. He fought briefly as a volunteer in the Chinese army against the invading Japanese. He stood trial for murder, and was shot and stabbed. He was seduced by older women, and stole their jewelry before leaving in the night. He worked at a sheep ranch, tearing off testicles in an assembly line with his teeth. He fought cannibals in the jungle. This truly was a wicked life, but somehow- one comes away with a great appreciation for Errol's ability and drive to "live life". While no one would nominate Errol for sainthood, his autobiography is a reminder of how much the world has changed this century, and if you anything like me- you might feel a little left out.
September 5, 2012
This book was amazing. Errol Flynn is the original "Most Interesting Man in the World". From his childhood in Australia, Tazmania, and teens in New Guinea, he astonishes you with all he has gone through to survive. He owned a plantation, rigged cock fights, stole and killed all before the age of 25.
His writing is simple where he does not bog you down with historical landscapes. He just tells you what he did, where he did it and who was involved.
Once he gets to Hollywood he doesn't pull any punches and tells it how it really was. Other Hollywood stars go on and on about their filmography and what the director/producer/head of the studio thought about each of their films. But here he gives you all the good stuff you really want to read about. You find yourself laughing at his pranks and saying WTH in his relationships with women.
One of the best autobiographies I've read.
His writing is simple where he does not bog you down with historical landscapes. He just tells you what he did, where he did it and who was involved.
Once he gets to Hollywood he doesn't pull any punches and tells it how it really was. Other Hollywood stars go on and on about their filmography and what the director/producer/head of the studio thought about each of their films. But here he gives you all the good stuff you really want to read about. You find yourself laughing at his pranks and saying WTH in his relationships with women.
One of the best autobiographies I've read.
July 2, 2022
Fascinating autobiography. Errol was brutally honest about his Wicked Wicked Ways. At times I really disliked him while reading the book, but then he would win me over with his charm once more much like he did fans during his career. It was very sad to read the final chapter. Flynn has just turned 50. He had come to peace with himself, with his mistakes, and seemed to be happy and ready for semi retirement. After finishing the book I did some research and he died at age 50 two months before the book was published. He talked about his movies a little bit throughout the book, but the majority of the book was about his private life, the parties, the women, the booze, and the Flynn charm. It was interesting to read the book has not been out of print since 1959. Flynn would have been pleased.
July 17, 2023
Don’t know how much of this was truth, how much of it fiction. Not sure that it matters, because as a movie star he was an idealized figure anyway and given that he was relentlessly clear when detailing his shortcomings, you come away with the sense that at least he was honest about many of his faults.
I can’t really untangle all my feelings regarding his taste for girls so young, so I won’t even try.
What completely surprised me was how moved I was by his reflections. Underneath all the prankish laughter and behavior, despite Flynn’s being an egotistical cad, there lurked a real sense of tragedy, especially regarding his relationship to his mother.
It seems that he experienced and understood much in his lifetime and because he appears to have been quite intelligent, much of what he wrote will linger with me for years to come—associations both good and bad.
I can’t really untangle all my feelings regarding his taste for girls so young, so I won’t even try.
What completely surprised me was how moved I was by his reflections. Underneath all the prankish laughter and behavior, despite Flynn’s being an egotistical cad, there lurked a real sense of tragedy, especially regarding his relationship to his mother.
It seems that he experienced and understood much in his lifetime and because he appears to have been quite intelligent, much of what he wrote will linger with me for years to come—associations both good and bad.
July 18, 2007
Maybe he wasn't the greatest actor in the world, but everyone loved him and everyone wanted to BE like him... to be "in, like Flynn."
Errol Flynn is one of my arch-types. Like my own life, he filled it with fascinating adventures and interests, but fulfillment always seemed to elude him.
The consummate swashbuckler, the ardent adventurer and a man's man. He writes here about his experiences from about age 16 to his move to America to become one of the biggest movie stars of his era. He was a schooner captain, an overseer at a plantation, witnessed all sorts of interesting situations, including the roasting of a giant sea-turtle by natives.
He was the closest thing to a real-life pirate in recent history.
Errol Flynn is one of my arch-types. Like my own life, he filled it with fascinating adventures and interests, but fulfillment always seemed to elude him.
The consummate swashbuckler, the ardent adventurer and a man's man. He writes here about his experiences from about age 16 to his move to America to become one of the biggest movie stars of his era. He was a schooner captain, an overseer at a plantation, witnessed all sorts of interesting situations, including the roasting of a giant sea-turtle by natives.
He was the closest thing to a real-life pirate in recent history.
April 27, 2019
One of my favorite Hollywood memoirs--both deliciously and appallingly entertaining.
The early chapters in which Errol cavorts from Manila to Hong Kong in the company of con artist Dr. Gerrit H. Koets, and then falls into the arms of seductive Ting Ling O'Connor, are some of the best.
I read this as a teenager (thrust on me by my mother, no less: "Read this--you'll love it.") and later in the Peace Corps, where a dog-eared copy circulated among volunteers--many themselves cast in a Flynn-like mold.
Errol Flynn is remembered almost entirely for his cinematic swash and buckle. But what lay beneath the shining eyes and roguish smile was a piercing mind. "My Wicked, Wicked Ways" reveals a man of infinite curiosity who chose to live life to the hilt--and not an inch less.
The early chapters in which Errol cavorts from Manila to Hong Kong in the company of con artist Dr. Gerrit H. Koets, and then falls into the arms of seductive Ting Ling O'Connor, are some of the best.
I read this as a teenager (thrust on me by my mother, no less: "Read this--you'll love it.") and later in the Peace Corps, where a dog-eared copy circulated among volunteers--many themselves cast in a Flynn-like mold.
Errol Flynn is remembered almost entirely for his cinematic swash and buckle. But what lay beneath the shining eyes and roguish smile was a piercing mind. "My Wicked, Wicked Ways" reveals a man of infinite curiosity who chose to live life to the hilt--and not an inch less.
November 4, 2019
A real life Flashman albeit with a slight conscience.
While you can never be sure how much to believe, Flynn does seem candid in his recollections -- most of which as the title implies are unflattering. It's not bragging. I would say there's a melancholy air to most of what he writes. A melancholy shrug of some kind.
One of the strangest passages -- which Robert Greene mentions -- appears after he was acquitted of statutory rape. He noted, as others did, that his popularity soared. It became some kind of hallmark. What this says about the world, as Errol readily says, can best be summed up by a question mark.
"This to me was the cardinal sin; to be middling was to be nothing."
While you can never be sure how much to believe, Flynn does seem candid in his recollections -- most of which as the title implies are unflattering. It's not bragging. I would say there's a melancholy air to most of what he writes. A melancholy shrug of some kind.
One of the strangest passages -- which Robert Greene mentions -- appears after he was acquitted of statutory rape. He noted, as others did, that his popularity soared. It became some kind of hallmark. What this says about the world, as Errol readily says, can best be summed up by a question mark.
"This to me was the cardinal sin; to be middling was to be nothing."
February 16, 2014
Hi
read this quite a while ago.
An interesting book, Errol did get up to so much trouble, and played hard, drank hard, partied hard, and sad to see his career go down hill so quickly.
good read
regards
Sean
read this quite a while ago.
An interesting book, Errol did get up to so much trouble, and played hard, drank hard, partied hard, and sad to see his career go down hill so quickly.
good read
regards
Sean
April 24, 2015
Hilarious and beautifully un-PC. This book would be shocking even if it came out today, so I can't imagine the reactions it provoked when it was published!
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