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Peril in Plain Space #1
Amish Vampires in Space
Jebediah has a secret that will change his world forever and send his people into space. The Amish world of Alabaster calls upon an ancient promise to escape destruction. They end up on a cargo ship bound for the stars. But they are not the only cargo on board. Some of it is alive...or used to be. Now, with vampires taking over and closing in on the Amish refugees, these simple believers must decide whether their faith depends upon their honored traditions or something even older.
427 pages, Paperback
First published September 30, 2013
82 people are currently reading
1620 people want to read
About the author
Kerry Nietz
34 books176 followersKerry Nietz is an award-winning science fiction author. He has over a half dozen speculative novels in print, along with a novella, a couple short stories, and a non-fiction book, FoxTales.
Kerry’s novel A Star Curiously Singing won the Readers Favorite Gold Medal Award for Christian Science Fiction and is notable for its dystopian, cyberpunk vibe in a world under sharia law. It has over a hundred 5-star reviews on Amazon and is often mentioned on “Best of” lists.
Among his writings, Kerry's most talked about is the genre-bending Amish Vampires in Space. AViS was mentioned on the Tonight Show and in the Washington Post, Library Journal, and Publishers Weekly. Newsweek called it “a welcome departure from the typical Amish fare.”
Kerry is a refugee of the software industry. He spent more than a decade of his life flipping bits, first as one of the principal developers of the database product FoxPro for the now mythical Fox Software, and then as one of Bill Gates's minions at Microsoft. He is a husband, a father, a technophile and a movie buff.
Kerry’s novel A Star Curiously Singing won the Readers Favorite Gold Medal Award for Christian Science Fiction and is notable for its dystopian, cyberpunk vibe in a world under sharia law. It has over a hundred 5-star reviews on Amazon and is often mentioned on “Best of” lists.
Among his writings, Kerry's most talked about is the genre-bending Amish Vampires in Space. AViS was mentioned on the Tonight Show and in the Washington Post, Library Journal, and Publishers Weekly. Newsweek called it “a welcome departure from the typical Amish fare.”
Kerry is a refugee of the software industry. He spent more than a decade of his life flipping bits, first as one of the principal developers of the database product FoxPro for the now mythical Fox Software, and then as one of Bill Gates's minions at Microsoft. He is a husband, a father, a technophile and a movie buff.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 190 reviews
March 1, 2017
Look at that title. Drink it in. It's what made me want to read this book, period.
Now, with a title like that, I'd prepared myself for a shortish, pulpy camp-fest. But no. Oh, no. THIS is a straight-up, well-written sci-fi novel.
This is a vision of the future I've not seen before. Kept simple, recognizable as a place we could indeed end up at. The tech was cool, and the evolved belief-system was nice and rational.
Contrarywise, it also had in depth and obviously researched depictions of Amish life. And then, of course, they go into space. With vampires.
Amish fucking vampires in space. I don't even know why I'm writing this review.
Now, with a title like that, I'd prepared myself for a shortish, pulpy camp-fest. But no. Oh, no. THIS is a straight-up, well-written sci-fi novel.
This is a vision of the future I've not seen before. Kept simple, recognizable as a place we could indeed end up at. The tech was cool, and the evolved belief-system was nice and rational.
Contrarywise, it also had in depth and obviously researched depictions of Amish life. And then, of course, they go into space. With vampires.
Amish fucking vampires in space. I don't even know why I'm writing this review.
avoid-like-the-plague
July 8, 2023 On this episode of ‘What’s Going On With That Cover’
How did the Amish undead even get to space? Pegasus-drawn carriages?
Check out previous episodes here: https://www.goodreads.com/review/list...
How did the Amish undead even get to space? Pegasus-drawn carriages?
Check out previous episodes here: https://www.goodreads.com/review/list...
Want to read
December 9, 2015I want to read this based 100% on the title, alone.
I mean...come on. Amish? Vampires? IN SPACE???
How can this not be a gem?
I mean...come on. Amish? Vampires? IN SPACE???
How can this not be a gem?
March 17, 2014
The story of how this book came to be is telling. Some people at a Christian publishing house, noting the popularity of Amish books, vampire books and science fiction in today's culture, thought up a title that would be a sure-fire hit. What they came up with was "Amish Vampires In Space," a hilarious idea, but so ridiculous that no writer would ever write it and no publisher would ever publish it. Hah! Someone decided to take it seriously.
This is the worst book I've ever read. I gave it one star only because that is the lowest one can go on Good Reads. As a person who was born Amish, I was offended that the portrayal of the Amish was just as made-up as the concept of vampires and of regular space travel and human settlements on other planets. The author allows his particular theological views to color his portrayal of the Amish. In the author's world, the teachings of Jesus about not resisting evil are impractical and he quickly converts the Amish in his book to the prevailing main-stream fundamentalist viewpoint of using physical weapons to fight and kill their brethren who have been infected by vampire bites.
I can take a joke. The title of the book started as a joke. If the book had been written in the same vein, it would have been tolerable. But the author decided to turn the joke title into an actual book with serious points and a sermon about the necessity of abandoning the pacifistic way of life the Amish have pursued for more than 500 years. His sermon would have been better preached behind the flag-draped pulpit of a pistol-packing preacher than by using the Amish as his weapon of mass destruction.
This is the worst book I've ever read. I gave it one star only because that is the lowest one can go on Good Reads. As a person who was born Amish, I was offended that the portrayal of the Amish was just as made-up as the concept of vampires and of regular space travel and human settlements on other planets. The author allows his particular theological views to color his portrayal of the Amish. In the author's world, the teachings of Jesus about not resisting evil are impractical and he quickly converts the Amish in his book to the prevailing main-stream fundamentalist viewpoint of using physical weapons to fight and kill their brethren who have been infected by vampire bites.
I can take a joke. The title of the book started as a joke. If the book had been written in the same vein, it would have been tolerable. But the author decided to turn the joke title into an actual book with serious points and a sermon about the necessity of abandoning the pacifistic way of life the Amish have pursued for more than 500 years. His sermon would have been better preached behind the flag-draped pulpit of a pistol-packing preacher than by using the Amish as his weapon of mass destruction.
January 15, 2014
When I first saw this book cover, I didn't know what to think. It looked like a joke. But I loved this author's other books, so I wanted to read this one and see for myself.
Here's the gist: Jeb is an Amish man living on the planet Alabaster as part of a group put there to colonize the planet. But Alabaster's sun is dying. And the Amish people must relocate before the sun explodes. A transport ship arrives to move them and their animals. But along the journey, something gets out of another cargo bay on the ship. Something from an old science base. Something dangerous. Soon, people are changing. And Jeb and a few others must do all they can to survive.
If you absolutely hate vampire stories, you probably won't like this one. I've never been a big fan of vampires, so I got a little squeamish in a few places. But I really liked how the author came up with a clever way for where the vampires came from. And the story is about more than vampires.
I loved the struggle the Amish faced, Jeb especially. He had been shunned, as sometimes happens in the Amish culture. He was expected to repent, but he didn't feel like he had committed a sin. There was a Christian officer on board the ship, and it was interesting to see her interact with Jeb and the other Amish as they talked about works-based faith vs. grace-based faith.
I also liked the way all the characters interacted and the way the storyworld was set up. How clever that Amish people would be used to colonize new planets. They work hard, cultivate the land. It makes sense. And I loved the twist with Jeb's wife. This book is good science fiction.
All in all, this story might have started out as a joke, but that is not how it ended up. This is a cool story, well-written and engaging, and very worth the read.
Here's the gist: Jeb is an Amish man living on the planet Alabaster as part of a group put there to colonize the planet. But Alabaster's sun is dying. And the Amish people must relocate before the sun explodes. A transport ship arrives to move them and their animals. But along the journey, something gets out of another cargo bay on the ship. Something from an old science base. Something dangerous. Soon, people are changing. And Jeb and a few others must do all they can to survive.
If you absolutely hate vampire stories, you probably won't like this one. I've never been a big fan of vampires, so I got a little squeamish in a few places. But I really liked how the author came up with a clever way for where the vampires came from. And the story is about more than vampires.
I loved the struggle the Amish faced, Jeb especially. He had been shunned, as sometimes happens in the Amish culture. He was expected to repent, but he didn't feel like he had committed a sin. There was a Christian officer on board the ship, and it was interesting to see her interact with Jeb and the other Amish as they talked about works-based faith vs. grace-based faith.
I also liked the way all the characters interacted and the way the storyworld was set up. How clever that Amish people would be used to colonize new planets. They work hard, cultivate the land. It makes sense. And I loved the twist with Jeb's wife. This book is good science fiction.
All in all, this story might have started out as a joke, but that is not how it ended up. This is a cool story, well-written and engaging, and very worth the read.
August 12, 2018
I like to think that over the past several years, I've cultivated an image of myself as a thoughtful, discerning reader with good tastes.
So, uh, how do I explain the fact that I found a book with the title "Amish Vampires in Space" to be a legitimately good book? >.>
Maybe it would help to mention the fact that the book was written as a challenge where the author took an intentionally terrible premise (combining the worst trends of the 2010-era publishing world) to see if he could write a legitimately good book off of that premise. (And where he pulled it off successfully!)
Perhaps it would help to mention how plausible the worldbuilding is here. After all--if you're a highly advanced culture trying to colonize worlds and you have to send early colonists without any of this technology everyone is accustomed to using, a society that eschews technology and knows how to cultivate land without it would be ideal candidates for colonists. If If you're a vampire trying to vampirize a whole community, of course you'd target a community that won't fight back by principle.
Or maybe the best route would be to mention the breadth of themes in this book as the author uses this situation to explore a variety of natural questions: Does technology destroy community? Is pacifism an adequate response to evil? Should you allow people to remain in your community when they unintentionally threaten to destroy it? How do you live peacefully with others who have radically different beliefs? The book explores a number of fascinating questions in ways that are naturally helped by this kind of premise.
At the end of the day, if you're willing to look past an intentionally-campy cover and title, this is a legitimately enjoyable read that's way better than the premise had any right to be. And--I can't believe I'm saying this--but I want more books about Amish vampires in space now. Good thing, um, that this book has a sequel called Amish Zombies in Space.
(I think my college is calling me right now to revoke literature degree.)
(Seriously, though, this is a good book. Go read it.)
Rating: 4 Stars (Very Good).
So, uh, how do I explain the fact that I found a book with the title "Amish Vampires in Space" to be a legitimately good book? >.>
Maybe it would help to mention the fact that the book was written as a challenge where the author took an intentionally terrible premise (combining the worst trends of the 2010-era publishing world) to see if he could write a legitimately good book off of that premise. (And where he pulled it off successfully!)
Perhaps it would help to mention how plausible the worldbuilding is here. After all--if you're a highly advanced culture trying to colonize worlds and you have to send early colonists without any of this technology everyone is accustomed to using, a society that eschews technology and knows how to cultivate land without it would be ideal candidates for colonists. If If you're a vampire trying to vampirize a whole community, of course you'd target a community that won't fight back by principle.
Or maybe the best route would be to mention the breadth of themes in this book as the author uses this situation to explore a variety of natural questions: Does technology destroy community? Is pacifism an adequate response to evil? Should you allow people to remain in your community when they unintentionally threaten to destroy it? How do you live peacefully with others who have radically different beliefs? The book explores a number of fascinating questions in ways that are naturally helped by this kind of premise.
At the end of the day, if you're willing to look past an intentionally-campy cover and title, this is a legitimately enjoyable read that's way better than the premise had any right to be. And--I can't believe I'm saying this--but I want more books about Amish vampires in space now. Good thing, um, that this book has a sequel called Amish Zombies in Space.
(I think my college is calling me right now to revoke literature degree.)
(Seriously, though, this is a good book. Go read it.)
Rating: 4 Stars (Very Good).
February 28, 2014
I have to start out by saying that this is perhaps the most original story I've ever read. I will admit that I was drawn in by the title after finding it on The Fussy Librarian, it was just so odd that I needed to check it out. After skimming through the reviews on both Goodreads and Amazon, and seeing it was an actual story - and not just a joke - I decided to give it a chance. I've been reading the same type of story lately, and I was in the mood for a change.
The story starts out slowly, introducing you to the Amish culture. I would like to point out that I was very impressed with how they were represented during the entire story. Never once did I feel they were the target of ridicule. It was done in a way that those not familiar with their beliefs would grasp them well enough to keep up with the story.
I was about 30% in when I realized that not only was this book unique but it was going to be one that would stick with me, especially Jebediah. I'm pretty impressed with how well it was told. The story is actually plausible. There are no lose ends or plot holes, everything is explained in a way that it's easy to accept.
This may not be anyone's choice of a normal read, it's an Amish science fiction! I know it sounds silly, but it was a really great story. I even cried at one part! It's a long book as well, but it reads easily. Anyone who is a fan of science fiction or Christian fiction would enjoy this book. Also, everyone should just read it anyway because, come on, how amusing would it be to tell people that you're readingAmish Vampires in Space?
5/5 platypires
http://www.platypire.com/3/post/2014/...
The story starts out slowly, introducing you to the Amish culture. I would like to point out that I was very impressed with how they were represented during the entire story. Never once did I feel they were the target of ridicule. It was done in a way that those not familiar with their beliefs would grasp them well enough to keep up with the story.
I was about 30% in when I realized that not only was this book unique but it was going to be one that would stick with me, especially Jebediah. I'm pretty impressed with how well it was told. The story is actually plausible. There are no lose ends or plot holes, everything is explained in a way that it's easy to accept.
This may not be anyone's choice of a normal read, it's an Amish science fiction! I know it sounds silly, but it was a really great story. I even cried at one part! It's a long book as well, but it reads easily. Anyone who is a fan of science fiction or Christian fiction would enjoy this book. Also, everyone should just read it anyway because, come on, how amusing would it be to tell people that you're readingAmish Vampires in Space?
5/5 platypires
http://www.platypire.com/3/post/2014/...
August 31, 2019
Finished this book quicker than I expected. It was a good, enjoyable synthesis of science fiction and horror despite its ludicrous title. Enjoyed it a great deal, and will no doubt eventually read the sequel.
October 23, 2013
Despite what you may think upon reading the title "Amish Vampires in Space," this is no parody, nor is it a big joke. This is a serious sci-fi novel that approaches a premise -- namely, how would you get Amish and vampires into space? -- and plays it totally straight.
It starts off as a tale of a young man's concern for his Amish community, and when faced with impending danger, the choice he makes that has consequences for his place in their community. It transforms into a space opera tale involving an interstellar transport, mysterious cargo, and a rapidly spreading infection. Kerry Nietz does a fantastic job of building suspense by not showing you what's happening in many places, but rather dwelling on how a select few of the characters are reacting to/planning for the crisis. That makes the appearance of the "bad guys" all the more intense when it happens.
As for the appearance of an Amish society in what is essentially a horror novel set in space, I found the portrayal very even handed and, as far as I am aware, accurate. The use of the Amish terms and portrayal of their customs was fascinating, and made it all the more poignant when certain aspects had to be given up or modified.
A job well done by Kerry and Marcher Lord Press!
It starts off as a tale of a young man's concern for his Amish community, and when faced with impending danger, the choice he makes that has consequences for his place in their community. It transforms into a space opera tale involving an interstellar transport, mysterious cargo, and a rapidly spreading infection. Kerry Nietz does a fantastic job of building suspense by not showing you what's happening in many places, but rather dwelling on how a select few of the characters are reacting to/planning for the crisis. That makes the appearance of the "bad guys" all the more intense when it happens.
As for the appearance of an Amish society in what is essentially a horror novel set in space, I found the portrayal very even handed and, as far as I am aware, accurate. The use of the Amish terms and portrayal of their customs was fascinating, and made it all the more poignant when certain aspects had to be given up or modified.
A job well done by Kerry and Marcher Lord Press!
June 9, 2017
Full review at Smart Bitches, Trashy Books
At our podcast live recording at the RT Convention, someone stated that there is a book called Amish Vampires in Space. Clearly, one of us was going to have to read this, and that someone was me. I was fully prepared to mock it to the heavens, but it turned out to be good – in a serious way, not as a parody. I’m very confused by this. My world is rocked.
According to the introduction, Amish Vampires in Space started as a joke. Jeff Gerke was working for a Christian publishing house that was inundated with Amish novels. Just for fun, Jeff came up with a pretend title and cover for a non-existent novel. Much later, the author Kerry Nietz asked for permission to write a book to go with the cover. Instead of using the concept for parody or over-the-top madness, he managed to figure out a premise that would allow for there to be Amish vampires in space – as science fiction/horror. The book has humor, but it’s not silly overall.
This story consists of multiple genres coming together, all with their own plausible conflicts. The story kicks off when Jebediah (the protagonist) uses a beacon to summon help (this is a simplification). The community is upset that he kept the existence of the beacon from him (it was passed down in his family in secret). They are also upset because both staying and leaving present different threats to the community (this is before the vampire problem kicks in). The book doesn’t have much romance, but the relationship between Jebediah and his pregnant wife, Sarah, is lovely (Sarah is often anxious because of her pregnancy but as soon as she has something to do she has nerves of steel).
This book earns a C+ for a couple of reasons. One is that the author has an odd tick in which a full sentence is frequently followed by a sentence fragment. This happens constantly and it’s awkward and irritating. Also, most of the characters, especially the crew members, could have used more nuance and development. As the story progresses, it runs off the rails (literally and figuratively) to a certain extent. Overall though, I have to hand the author my respect for patching all the motifs together in a way that pretty much works and that sincerely scared me. If nothing else, it’s fun to read something different, and something in which you can really see an author tackling a challenge.
An anecdote – I read this while flying home from RT and we hit some serious turbulence and I thought, “Oh God, I’m going to die. I’m going to die while reading Amish Vampires in Space.” Luckily I lived, and finished the book just as my luggage rolled of the baggage carousel – perfect timing. And yes, there’s a sequel, with zombies, to entertain me on my next flight.
- Carrie S.
At our podcast live recording at the RT Convention, someone stated that there is a book called Amish Vampires in Space. Clearly, one of us was going to have to read this, and that someone was me. I was fully prepared to mock it to the heavens, but it turned out to be good – in a serious way, not as a parody. I’m very confused by this. My world is rocked.
According to the introduction, Amish Vampires in Space started as a joke. Jeff Gerke was working for a Christian publishing house that was inundated with Amish novels. Just for fun, Jeff came up with a pretend title and cover for a non-existent novel. Much later, the author Kerry Nietz asked for permission to write a book to go with the cover. Instead of using the concept for parody or over-the-top madness, he managed to figure out a premise that would allow for there to be Amish vampires in space – as science fiction/horror. The book has humor, but it’s not silly overall.
This story consists of multiple genres coming together, all with their own plausible conflicts. The story kicks off when Jebediah (the protagonist) uses a beacon to summon help (this is a simplification). The community is upset that he kept the existence of the beacon from him (it was passed down in his family in secret). They are also upset because both staying and leaving present different threats to the community (this is before the vampire problem kicks in). The book doesn’t have much romance, but the relationship between Jebediah and his pregnant wife, Sarah, is lovely (Sarah is often anxious because of her pregnancy but as soon as she has something to do she has nerves of steel).
This book earns a C+ for a couple of reasons. One is that the author has an odd tick in which a full sentence is frequently followed by a sentence fragment. This happens constantly and it’s awkward and irritating. Also, most of the characters, especially the crew members, could have used more nuance and development. As the story progresses, it runs off the rails (literally and figuratively) to a certain extent. Overall though, I have to hand the author my respect for patching all the motifs together in a way that pretty much works and that sincerely scared me. If nothing else, it’s fun to read something different, and something in which you can really see an author tackling a challenge.
An anecdote – I read this while flying home from RT and we hit some serious turbulence and I thought, “Oh God, I’m going to die. I’m going to die while reading Amish Vampires in Space.” Luckily I lived, and finished the book just as my luggage rolled of the baggage carousel – perfect timing. And yes, there’s a sequel, with zombies, to entertain me on my next flight.
- Carrie S.
August 11, 2016
You must have discernment. That is what I told myself before reading this Christian fiction book. I thought for sure it would either be totally dumb or some distorted version of Christianity (“everything goes” cuz because God is all about love). I read the statement of faith on the Marcher Lord Press website. Right on target! The Scripture quotes in the book are from the NASB. Great! The acknowledgements at the beginning praise God. As it should be! The forward explained the goal – to gain new fans of terrific Christian SF and Fantasy. What about the supernatural, you say? (A shocked Christian friend asked how I could dare entertain the occult in my reading!) Quite simply, there were no devils or evil spirits, just science, technology, suspense, some blood, and tons and tons of grace. Yes, the Christian saved the day, or rather, saved souls. The Message fused right into the story. (The author wasn’t trying to “overtly convert me.”) What it means to be Amish verses that it means to be Christian drove the ending. No aspect of the entire novel riled me. All around impressive read. Note: Last I looked, Christianbook.com didn’t carry this book. Shame on you! Conversely, congratulations Marcher Lord Press! You have gained a new Christian Science Fiction fan!
December 13, 2016
2.5 Stars
Read all my reviews on http://urlphantomhive.booklikes.com
When I first heard about Amish Vampires in Space I was sure it was supposed to be some kind of a spoof. Quickly, I found out that in fact it was a serious science fiction novel concerning Amish, vampires and space.
Immediately my expectations were much higher, to have this kind of story and not mean it as a spoof, it was supposed to be really good. A novel that was just okay wouldn't do. So maybe I'm just judging this novel too harsh.
Although I still don't really understand why the Amish joined the space ship and the vampires seem at first quite random, it was an okay book. It was indeed what it promised: Amish Vampires in Space. What it didn't do was add something extra to it. It was alright when I was reading it but I didn't feel anything for either the story or the characters.
Additionally there were some weird things. For example, at some point an Amish woman wonders why her husband hasn't called her, while she has never used a phone herself. This seems a weird thought under those conditions. There were some more of these things and also the end, I somehow saw it coming...
Read all my reviews on http://urlphantomhive.booklikes.com
When I first heard about Amish Vampires in Space I was sure it was supposed to be some kind of a spoof. Quickly, I found out that in fact it was a serious science fiction novel concerning Amish, vampires and space.
Immediately my expectations were much higher, to have this kind of story and not mean it as a spoof, it was supposed to be really good. A novel that was just okay wouldn't do. So maybe I'm just judging this novel too harsh.
Although I still don't really understand why the Amish joined the space ship and the vampires seem at first quite random, it was an okay book. It was indeed what it promised: Amish Vampires in Space. What it didn't do was add something extra to it. It was alright when I was reading it but I didn't feel anything for either the story or the characters.
Additionally there were some weird things. For example, at some point an Amish woman wonders why her husband hasn't called her, while she has never used a phone herself. This seems a weird thought under those conditions. There were some more of these things and also the end, I somehow saw it coming...
April 10, 2015
Like poles on a magnet, Amish repelled me and Vampires attracted me. I heard about this title and thought it was going to be a parody and was disappointed that it wasn't. Not that it mattered, I really wanted to read this book. For a lot of reasons mostly that it sounded like a great read even if it wasn't a comedy. I was not disappointed.
I grew up in the Midwest not far from several Amish communities. The way of life lost its appeal with the end of the Little House on the Prairie and my desire to wear long dresses in a pre-electric world. Not only do I like electronic gadgets, I also like wearing lime green, skinny jeans, and boots. And for books, I'd rather read about undead blood suckers than women in plain dresses who marry men that have to mustache-less beards upon marriage. Facial hair - I'm not a fan.
What I liked about the story was everything. But broken down, it was the characters, the premise, and the themes presented. Character is king. Without good characters, I won't give a book 5 stars. I loved every character. They each had distinct voices and arc.
The best part of the book was the way Kerry Nietz examined the Amish way of life from several POVs particularly Jeb's. The drought on Alabaster then the sickness tested the faith of those in the Amish community, and Jeb's was tested the furthest. He ventured beyond their cloister to the point of shunning. He knew in his heart he did the right thing and yet questioned himself but remained faithful and prayerful with each decision.
I challenge those who love Amish fiction to read this book and examine their perspective on the Amish faith. A well done book with a well-paced plot, mystery, suspense, and a much deeper theme than the fun title suggests.
I grew up in the Midwest not far from several Amish communities. The way of life lost its appeal with the end of the Little House on the Prairie and my desire to wear long dresses in a pre-electric world. Not only do I like electronic gadgets, I also like wearing lime green, skinny jeans, and boots. And for books, I'd rather read about undead blood suckers than women in plain dresses who marry men that have to mustache-less beards upon marriage. Facial hair - I'm not a fan.
What I liked about the story was everything. But broken down, it was the characters, the premise, and the themes presented. Character is king. Without good characters, I won't give a book 5 stars. I loved every character. They each had distinct voices and arc.
The best part of the book was the way Kerry Nietz examined the Amish way of life from several POVs particularly Jeb's. The drought on Alabaster then the sickness tested the faith of those in the Amish community, and Jeb's was tested the furthest. He ventured beyond their cloister to the point of shunning. He knew in his heart he did the right thing and yet questioned himself but remained faithful and prayerful with each decision.
I challenge those who love Amish fiction to read this book and examine their perspective on the Amish faith. A well done book with a well-paced plot, mystery, suspense, and a much deeper theme than the fun title suggests.
October 25, 2013
Nothing short of amazing. I've read enough Amish and vampire fiction to like neither. I only bought and read this for a friend. "In space"? I couldn't conceive how that could possibly work. But it does. Very well.
The story starts slowly as Nietz assembles his cast and paints the background. In fact, the reader (tipped off by the title) sees the coming train wreck long before any of the characters. Typically, the humans are following their daily routines with sometimes maddening monomania. As the elements come together, the story develops a momentum that carries the reader along to a potentially galactic apocalypse.
Depending more on biology and chemistry where the typical science fiction relies solely on physics, Amish Vampires in Space is not without flaws and gaffs, but they are less noticeable than those found in much contemporary SF. I can't be too specific about my quibbles without giving things away, but they include the availability of available arsenic in a confined space ship environment, the almost instantaneous manifestation of physical alterations due to recent chromosomal changes in already mature mammals, and the variable efficacy of advanced medical technology. That the humans would have missed what was going on until it was almost too late--or who the prime threat was--is normal and believable.
The cover art captures the incongruity, if not the horror, of the tale.
Still, a very good read. (Not that I'm going to read Beverly Lewis or Anna Rice next. Sorry, ladies.)
The story starts slowly as Nietz assembles his cast and paints the background. In fact, the reader (tipped off by the title) sees the coming train wreck long before any of the characters. Typically, the humans are following their daily routines with sometimes maddening monomania. As the elements come together, the story develops a momentum that carries the reader along to a potentially galactic apocalypse.
Depending more on biology and chemistry where the typical science fiction relies solely on physics, Amish Vampires in Space is not without flaws and gaffs, but they are less noticeable than those found in much contemporary SF. I can't be too specific about my quibbles without giving things away, but they include the availability of available arsenic in a confined space ship environment, the almost instantaneous manifestation of physical alterations due to recent chromosomal changes in already mature mammals, and the variable efficacy of advanced medical technology. That the humans would have missed what was going on until it was almost too late--or who the prime threat was--is normal and believable.
The cover art captures the incongruity, if not the horror, of the tale.
Still, a very good read. (Not that I'm going to read Beverly Lewis or Anna Rice next. Sorry, ladies.)
June 23, 2017
Really, could this review be any more pithy than:
"Do we really need another Amish Vampires in Space book?"
-- Jimmy Fallon, The Tonight Show
"If you read no other book on this topic this year, make it this one!"
-- Dave Barry, Pulitzer Prize winning author and columnist
This book came upon my radar as a result of one of those blogging lists (10 Best Book Titles or similar). What really intrigued me about this title is that one of its genres is Christian. Really? Christian? How can they pull that one off? I bought the Audible audiobook because I thought this would be a perfect book to read while exercising. (I resolved ONLY to listen to it while exercising in order to ensure a minimum number of times on the stationary bike.)
This is actually a decent sci-fi/horror, Christian story. One issue I often have with Christian fiction (especially Movies!) is the predictability of the plot. This book does not sacrifice the viability of the story in order to send a clear in-your-face Gospel message. Also, the book is occasionally creepy (required in Vampire settings) but does not dwell in gross minutiae. The context of Christianity is that it’s a quaint lifestyle in this futuristic setting. The improbably mixture of Amish with Space Cargo Merchants brings it to the forefront in a reasonable way. This book has appeal for Christian, Sci-Fi enthusiasts such as myself. Uh, I guess it could appeal if you’re an admirer of Amish too.
As the plot matures, Amish Vampires also deals with other Christian sub-themes such as Grace vs. works, and pacifism vs. acceptable lethal force. There is some real philosophical meat here amongst the fight for humanity’s survival (No, really. If our heroes aren’t successful, it could mean the end of humanity!)
I was entertained and I am the healthier for it. As a result of listening to this audiobook, I spent more than 15 hours on the exercise bike. Ironically, my cardiovascular health is at least marginally improved as a result. But, hey, as the Bible says “The Life is in the Blood.”
"Do we really need another Amish Vampires in Space book?"
-- Jimmy Fallon, The Tonight Show
"If you read no other book on this topic this year, make it this one!"
-- Dave Barry, Pulitzer Prize winning author and columnist
This book came upon my radar as a result of one of those blogging lists (10 Best Book Titles or similar). What really intrigued me about this title is that one of its genres is Christian. Really? Christian? How can they pull that one off? I bought the Audible audiobook because I thought this would be a perfect book to read while exercising. (I resolved ONLY to listen to it while exercising in order to ensure a minimum number of times on the stationary bike.)
This is actually a decent sci-fi/horror, Christian story. One issue I often have with Christian fiction (especially Movies!) is the predictability of the plot. This book does not sacrifice the viability of the story in order to send a clear in-your-face Gospel message. Also, the book is occasionally creepy (required in Vampire settings) but does not dwell in gross minutiae. The context of Christianity is that it’s a quaint lifestyle in this futuristic setting. The improbably mixture of Amish with Space Cargo Merchants brings it to the forefront in a reasonable way. This book has appeal for Christian, Sci-Fi enthusiasts such as myself. Uh, I guess it could appeal if you’re an admirer of Amish too.
As the plot matures, Amish Vampires also deals with other Christian sub-themes such as Grace vs. works, and pacifism vs. acceptable lethal force. There is some real philosophical meat here amongst the fight for humanity’s survival (No, really. If our heroes aren’t successful, it could mean the end of humanity!)
I was entertained and I am the healthier for it. As a result of listening to this audiobook, I spent more than 15 hours on the exercise bike. Ironically, my cardiovascular health is at least marginally improved as a result. But, hey, as the Bible says “The Life is in the Blood.”
September 5, 2014
So Amish Vampires in Space. Obviously not mean to be taken seriously, however begging the question – how should one take this book?
My first surprise in picking up this gem was an introduction from Jeff Gerke (who writes, the First 50 pages – recommended reading for would-be authors.) He explains that Amish themed novels had saturated the Christian books market, (and of course vampire fiction the general young adult) I’m not too sure where the Space came from, other than ‘In Space’ is a long-standing cliché and one can’t be too picky having chosen to read this book in the first place.
Apparently the idea was given to Neitz who returned a piece ‘played straight’ certainly a hilarious move in general, not sure where it leaves a reader however. This book read ‘straight’ leaves one wondering if they are meant to enjoy the story with a slightly humorous backdrop or not read it at all and just chuckle at the idea.
To be honest, the latter is best. Aside from one moment when a pig flies due to its bat mutation, the story is oddly devoid of laugh out loud humour, relying mostly on the bizarre take on tropes and clichés, leading to one reading the book in a permanent state of cringe. It must be said that the story is constructed relatively skillfully, and I actually recommend the book as a study in story construction (as the stupid premise prevents overthinking other areas.) I guess the problem is that book doesn't commit to pure humour, but the story and characters are just a little shy of being relatable and fun.
In summary – the joke is almost entirely in the front cover, I recommend not only judging the book by it, but in fact considering yourself to have absorbed all of worth from it by observing the cover.
My first surprise in picking up this gem was an introduction from Jeff Gerke (who writes, the First 50 pages – recommended reading for would-be authors.) He explains that Amish themed novels had saturated the Christian books market, (and of course vampire fiction the general young adult) I’m not too sure where the Space came from, other than ‘In Space’ is a long-standing cliché and one can’t be too picky having chosen to read this book in the first place.
Apparently the idea was given to Neitz who returned a piece ‘played straight’ certainly a hilarious move in general, not sure where it leaves a reader however. This book read ‘straight’ leaves one wondering if they are meant to enjoy the story with a slightly humorous backdrop or not read it at all and just chuckle at the idea.
To be honest, the latter is best. Aside from one moment when a pig flies due to its bat mutation, the story is oddly devoid of laugh out loud humour, relying mostly on the bizarre take on tropes and clichés, leading to one reading the book in a permanent state of cringe. It must be said that the story is constructed relatively skillfully, and I actually recommend the book as a study in story construction (as the stupid premise prevents overthinking other areas.) I guess the problem is that book doesn't commit to pure humour, but the story and characters are just a little shy of being relatable and fun.
In summary – the joke is almost entirely in the front cover, I recommend not only judging the book by it, but in fact considering yourself to have absorbed all of worth from it by observing the cover.
October 18, 2019
According to the foreword, this was a silly idea that someone (indeed, Kerry Nietz) decided to write up in a serious manner. I wish I could travel through time so that I could sit down with Kerry Nietz and say, "Dude. No. Seriously. Stop."
I hoped it would be campy. It was not. I hoped it would be funny unintentionally or intentionally. It was neither sort of funny. What else was it not? Scary, well written, interesting or even halfway convincing with any of its scifi or technology. Have you seen Axe Cop? You know, where the 6 year old makes up stories and his older brother turns them into comics? This is like that, only the person writing is taking the six year old seriously and no one is self aware enough to say, "HAHAHA THIS IS RUBBISH." Reading this book feels like this: Learning your much older and very well respected boss has never learned to tie his shoes, and then watching him struggle to learn to do so for ten hours.
The magical shielding armor? TINGLE SUITS. The color of everything (and I mean EVERYTHING) in the ship? Blue. Not just blue, but "efficient blue," and "medium blue." This author went into the adjective bag on the day it was almost empty, and it shows.
Also, the exposition by the characters is painful. A jahrling. What is a jahrling? Well don't worry because the Amish character who uses that word explains it immediately afterward in a painfully obvious "I am speaking for the author" way. We also have a captain named Seal who mumbles expository type things to the point that other people on the ship must be wondering if he's gone mad. We have an Amish society who paid a fortune for an insurance policy. We have vampiric goats and chickens, and a whole ton of people who never once think, "Are you kidding me right now? Vampire chickens?" All these characters take it EVER SO SERIOUSLY.
On top of all of that, you have some kind of weird, "OH NOES there are foes and the amish are pacifists, what ever will we doooooooooooooo" thing. And Jesus comes into it, of course. Like, hey, I get that Nietz wrote a book. I never have. So bully for him. But I am so very sorry to have read this.
It got to where I couldn't even laugh. It was just so...pointless. Like the sad chickens who were turned into vampires...this book has no teeth.
I hoped it would be campy. It was not. I hoped it would be funny unintentionally or intentionally. It was neither sort of funny. What else was it not? Scary, well written, interesting or even halfway convincing with any of its scifi or technology. Have you seen Axe Cop? You know, where the 6 year old makes up stories and his older brother turns them into comics? This is like that, only the person writing is taking the six year old seriously and no one is self aware enough to say, "HAHAHA THIS IS RUBBISH." Reading this book feels like this: Learning your much older and very well respected boss has never learned to tie his shoes, and then watching him struggle to learn to do so for ten hours.
The magical shielding armor? TINGLE SUITS. The color of everything (and I mean EVERYTHING) in the ship? Blue. Not just blue, but "efficient blue," and "medium blue." This author went into the adjective bag on the day it was almost empty, and it shows.
Also, the exposition by the characters is painful. A jahrling. What is a jahrling? Well don't worry because the Amish character who uses that word explains it immediately afterward in a painfully obvious "I am speaking for the author" way. We also have a captain named Seal who mumbles expository type things to the point that other people on the ship must be wondering if he's gone mad. We have an Amish society who paid a fortune for an insurance policy. We have vampiric goats and chickens, and a whole ton of people who never once think, "Are you kidding me right now? Vampire chickens?" All these characters take it EVER SO SERIOUSLY.
On top of all of that, you have some kind of weird, "OH NOES there are foes and the amish are pacifists, what ever will we doooooooooooooo" thing. And Jesus comes into it, of course. Like, hey, I get that Nietz wrote a book. I never have. So bully for him. But I am so very sorry to have read this.
It got to where I couldn't even laugh. It was just so...pointless. Like the sad chickens who were turned into vampires...this book has no teeth.
November 20, 2013
The title makes you think of a train wreck, the kind you drive by slowly so you can look even though you know you shouldn't. In this case, the slow down and look is worth it. Despite the camp title, Kerry plays the story straight. I even think he treats the Amish viewpoint with respect. He does disagree with said viewpoint, but does not make the mistake of saying that anyone who thinks a particular way is stupid. In the whole book with a large cast, there are only two people cast as stupids, and they aren't Amish. And for the few Amish that act like jerks, you get the feeling that they are not twirling their mustaches with glee, praying bwa ha ha, but rather, that they are being pushed off a cliff, and like anybody being pushed off a cliff, they are grabbing hard and hanging on to keep from going over.
I need explanations, or at the end, I want to throw the book away, so I was glad that Kerry provided explanations by the end.
WRITER'S RANT: Kerry. I understand the rationale for writing novels in sentence fragments and three-word sentences: the short sentences and fragments make the pace of the novel feel faster, and reluctant readers don't get lost between the start of the sentence and the end. I understand that writing in bits is standard for thrillers and today's readers with the attention span of gnats, but this chop, chop, chop style of writing makes my skin bunch up with tension. Could you sometime in the future, please, oh please, write a novel, as you are quite capable of, in longer sentences that will glide through my brain and over my skin? END OF RANT
If you like science-fiction mixed with a little horror and some humor (the vampire goat cracked me up) you should like this thrilling tale of Amish Vampires in space.
I need explanations, or at the end, I want to throw the book away, so I was glad that Kerry provided explanations by the end.
WRITER'S RANT: Kerry. I understand the rationale for writing novels in sentence fragments and three-word sentences: the short sentences and fragments make the pace of the novel feel faster, and reluctant readers don't get lost between the start of the sentence and the end. I understand that writing in bits is standard for thrillers and today's readers with the attention span of gnats, but this chop, chop, chop style of writing makes my skin bunch up with tension. Could you sometime in the future, please, oh please, write a novel, as you are quite capable of, in longer sentences that will glide through my brain and over my skin? END OF RANT
If you like science-fiction mixed with a little horror and some humor (the vampire goat cracked me up) you should like this thrilling tale of Amish Vampires in space.
May 18, 2019
4.5 Stars. Cultures collide when a dying sun drives an Amish community from their sheltered world into the advanced technology of the English sent to rescue them before their world is destroyed.
The story begins with Jebediah’s secret, the weight of which propels him to use technology prohibited by his community’s laws. Though Jebediah’s actions save his people, his decision to use the forbidden technology leads to his being shunned by the very people he sought to save.
In an effort to honor the Amish traditions while on board the massive transport ship tasked with bringing them to safety, Jebediah and his wife, Sarah, are given separate quarters away from the area cordoned off as a communal area for the rest of the Amish.
But what should be a peaceful, routine trip (except for the added burden of transporting the unusual group of Amish) from one world to another, develops into a major fight for survival. The remains of a science community destroyed in a mysterious accident, also being transported, are harboring a dark secret of their own. What triggered the destruction of the science community and the legacy of their research will affect every person on the transport.
This is a well-crafted story. Neitz didn’t take the easy way out by playing it as a farce but put effort into blending two opposing genres with an eye to detail and a believable arc. For me, the only draw back was my inability to really connect with any character on a deeper level. But that could just be me. All in all, a worthwhile read. Although I don’t know if those who typically read the Amish genre will appreciate this story, those who enjoy a thrilling science fiction book certainly will.
The story begins with Jebediah’s secret, the weight of which propels him to use technology prohibited by his community’s laws. Though Jebediah’s actions save his people, his decision to use the forbidden technology leads to his being shunned by the very people he sought to save.
In an effort to honor the Amish traditions while on board the massive transport ship tasked with bringing them to safety, Jebediah and his wife, Sarah, are given separate quarters away from the area cordoned off as a communal area for the rest of the Amish.
But what should be a peaceful, routine trip (except for the added burden of transporting the unusual group of Amish) from one world to another, develops into a major fight for survival. The remains of a science community destroyed in a mysterious accident, also being transported, are harboring a dark secret of their own. What triggered the destruction of the science community and the legacy of their research will affect every person on the transport.
This is a well-crafted story. Neitz didn’t take the easy way out by playing it as a farce but put effort into blending two opposing genres with an eye to detail and a believable arc. For me, the only draw back was my inability to really connect with any character on a deeper level. But that could just be me. All in all, a worthwhile read. Although I don’t know if those who typically read the Amish genre will appreciate this story, those who enjoy a thrilling science fiction book certainly will.
October 7, 2013
It’s not a joke. It’s for real. And it’s really good. All 534 pages of it.
I’m one of the lucky ones. I got an advanced copy of Amish Vampires in Space from the publisher (in exchange for an honest review). I would have finished it much sooner but life intervened. Isn’t it frustrating how life can get in the way of a really good book at times? ;)
This book is science fiction, and that’s what makes it strangely plausible. From Amish colonization of their own planet (can you not see the Amish jumping at the chance of getting their own whole planet (aside from having to ride a space ship to get there?)) to the origination of vampires, Kerry Nietz has done a brilliant job. The Amish society and their Ordnung-based motivations are believable. It’s their conflict with modernity and survival that has created a rich and rewarding theological tapestry that is refreshing, non-preachy, and open-ended. And the book comes full circle, giving the reader satisfaction at the end of the story.
Amish Vampires in Space is perfect for sci-fi or horror fans. But it’s also a great jump-in place to the world of speculative fiction for Amish fiction lovers, or readers of more conventional Christian fiction.
I’m one of the lucky ones. I got an advanced copy of Amish Vampires in Space from the publisher (in exchange for an honest review). I would have finished it much sooner but life intervened. Isn’t it frustrating how life can get in the way of a really good book at times? ;)
This book is science fiction, and that’s what makes it strangely plausible. From Amish colonization of their own planet (can you not see the Amish jumping at the chance of getting their own whole planet (aside from having to ride a space ship to get there?)) to the origination of vampires, Kerry Nietz has done a brilliant job. The Amish society and their Ordnung-based motivations are believable. It’s their conflict with modernity and survival that has created a rich and rewarding theological tapestry that is refreshing, non-preachy, and open-ended. And the book comes full circle, giving the reader satisfaction at the end of the story.
Amish Vampires in Space is perfect for sci-fi or horror fans. But it’s also a great jump-in place to the world of speculative fiction for Amish fiction lovers, or readers of more conventional Christian fiction.
October 23, 2019
If I were held at gunpoint and given a choice between re-reading every page of this book and eating bits of toilet paper stuck to my bum after a two-day bout of explosive diarrhea, I would not hesitate to choose the latter. Disgusting as that sounds, at least it would be over quickly, unlike having to read this 490-page calamity of unimaginative and expressionless word vomit.
Why do I say this? The author has a strangely limited command of vocabulary and hasn’t the slightest idea how to describe almost anything – people, space travel, future technology, vampires, etc. The book is 490 pages, when the story itself could easily be told in half that number and with far better narrative (by an eight-grader).
Following are (in my opinion) the most egregious issues with this book:
LACK OF VOCABULARY
- Female characters are described in relation to the word “attractive.” She can be “very attractive,” “reasonably attractive,” or horror of horrors, “not attractive.” In some cases these character portraits are expanded with descriptions of hair length and texture, often involving a lock of hair dangling in modestly suggestive way. Sexist, crude, lame.
- The color blue is abused thoroughly throughout the book. There’s “efficient blue,” “solid blue,” “regulation blue,” “soft blue,” “navy blue,” “dark blue,” “deep blue,” “shiny blue,” “medium blue,” “all shades of blue,” “clothes hanging out of the closest like blue intestines,” and “blue balls of energy.” I strongly doubt Mr. Nietz owns a thesaurus, let alone has access to paint swatches…
- The most effusive descriptions in the book center around desks - an Amish desk early on, the desk in a guest’s quarters, and an almost fetish-like treatment of the captain’s technology-enhanced desk. Not that either item is anything more than a prop for characters given to wooden rumination...
POOR SENTENCE FRAGMENTS LACKING VOCABULARY
The author is overly fond of ham-handed sentence fragments devoid of finesse:
“Large piles of wrapping material. Most of it from food stuffs. An enormous amount. Enough to feed five people for days.”
"He was a large man -- a hay man."
"... Congi's eyes. They were dark. Incredibly handsome. Like tiny holes."
"Reasonably attractive, especially for someone from a profession where appearance wasn't typically a high priority."
"He was a top performer. A champion schedule maker. But what else? He felt unsettled. Very, very strange."
"She speared a bite of her white meat-like substance and raised it to her lips. Glanced to her left. Chewed."
"Darly had a rolling equipment rack with her. It had many compartments. Categorized. Alphabetized. Scientific."
"The guards stared to fire. Pling! Pling!"
UNINSPIRED FUTURE TECHNOLOGY LACKING ADEQUATE DESCRIPTIONS
Scraddle – some sort of device used for communication, which supposedly is more than a radio but we have no idea in what way(s) it’s any different, nor how. So why not just call it a radio?
Slideway – a sort of moving sidewalk, which we’re told makes it easier to traverse the large ship, but it’s unclear how it got that name since it has nothing to do with actual sliding. Running on it is called “fliding,” for reasons equally mysterious.
Excretorium – a toilet that supposedly does many other things, but we’re not told any of them.
CHRISTIAN PROSELYTISM
A major plot point part at the half-way mark centers around the awkward romance of the captain and a young, perky “scraddle” operator (see above), who's revealed during a dinner date to be “A Christian.” More accurately, a born-again Christian. She finger-wags the captain like he’s somehow defective without her faith, and she later Bible-splains to one of the Amish about how their faith community has misinterpreted the Bible and Jesus’ teachings. The air of superiority about it is almost annoying as the fact that this plot point dies a couple of chapters later and is never heard from again.
While I have no objections to a Christian character or that of any other faith, Mr. Nietz and his publisher make it clear this is a key reason for the book's existence. Had I known of the evangelical nature of this book, I would not have chosen to read it. This could have been made clearer in the marketing description.
DUBIOUS PROMOTION & ETHICAL CHALLENGES
Reviews on Amazon and Goodreads are heavily represented by people who were given review copies. While reviewers generally disclose this, a number of the reviews appear highly dubious. One reviewer on Amazon gushes about Mr. Nietz's "customary finesse and mastery of language and storytelling." This statement is completely at odds with the quality of workmanship on this novel, to anyone who has ever read more than five books. Something smells rotten here...
Even more disturbing, The Kindle version contains a personal appeal from the author, asking readers to fight criticism of his book. Here’s the entire text, verbatim from Kindle:
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
“HELP PROVE THEM WRONG!
It probably won't surprise you to learn that this book has endured a fair share of ridicule. ....
How could someone throw such diverse concept into a story together and make it work? ....
... the majority of those who actually read the book are surprised by what they find: a thoughtful, informed, and enjoyable tale.
If you're one of those people -- if this book met or exceeded your expectations in any way, please consider telling your friends....”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It appears the author does not understand the difference between outlandish subject matter and the poor quality of his writing. To be clear, I bought the book for the former; my beef is with the latter.
PRINT EDITION
I don't like to read electronically due to eye strain, so I bought the print copy. The cover is the best thing about this book. The typesetting of the book itself is atrocious. Think "copy/paste" with no formatting. No attention to typeface, margin setting, line spacing in the body. The page numbers are ridiculously miniscule.
CONCLUSION
The writing stinks to high heaven, the book's marketing is border-line fraudulent, the religious proselytizing is insulting to believers who actually study their faiths. It's a crap-fest of epic proportions. I would consider buying the author a thesaurus and beating him with it, were it not for the fact that I'm out $18 for this stupid, stupid, stupid, pointless garbage.
Why do I say this? The author has a strangely limited command of vocabulary and hasn’t the slightest idea how to describe almost anything – people, space travel, future technology, vampires, etc. The book is 490 pages, when the story itself could easily be told in half that number and with far better narrative (by an eight-grader).
Following are (in my opinion) the most egregious issues with this book:
LACK OF VOCABULARY
- Female characters are described in relation to the word “attractive.” She can be “very attractive,” “reasonably attractive,” or horror of horrors, “not attractive.” In some cases these character portraits are expanded with descriptions of hair length and texture, often involving a lock of hair dangling in modestly suggestive way. Sexist, crude, lame.
- The color blue is abused thoroughly throughout the book. There’s “efficient blue,” “solid blue,” “regulation blue,” “soft blue,” “navy blue,” “dark blue,” “deep blue,” “shiny blue,” “medium blue,” “all shades of blue,” “clothes hanging out of the closest like blue intestines,” and “blue balls of energy.” I strongly doubt Mr. Nietz owns a thesaurus, let alone has access to paint swatches…
- The most effusive descriptions in the book center around desks - an Amish desk early on, the desk in a guest’s quarters, and an almost fetish-like treatment of the captain’s technology-enhanced desk. Not that either item is anything more than a prop for characters given to wooden rumination...
POOR SENTENCE FRAGMENTS LACKING VOCABULARY
The author is overly fond of ham-handed sentence fragments devoid of finesse:
“Large piles of wrapping material. Most of it from food stuffs. An enormous amount. Enough to feed five people for days.”
"He was a large man -- a hay man."
"... Congi's eyes. They were dark. Incredibly handsome. Like tiny holes."
"Reasonably attractive, especially for someone from a profession where appearance wasn't typically a high priority."
"He was a top performer. A champion schedule maker. But what else? He felt unsettled. Very, very strange."
"She speared a bite of her white meat-like substance and raised it to her lips. Glanced to her left. Chewed."
"Darly had a rolling equipment rack with her. It had many compartments. Categorized. Alphabetized. Scientific."
"The guards stared to fire. Pling! Pling!"
UNINSPIRED FUTURE TECHNOLOGY LACKING ADEQUATE DESCRIPTIONS
Scraddle – some sort of device used for communication, which supposedly is more than a radio but we have no idea in what way(s) it’s any different, nor how. So why not just call it a radio?
Slideway – a sort of moving sidewalk, which we’re told makes it easier to traverse the large ship, but it’s unclear how it got that name since it has nothing to do with actual sliding. Running on it is called “fliding,” for reasons equally mysterious.
Excretorium – a toilet that supposedly does many other things, but we’re not told any of them.
CHRISTIAN PROSELYTISM
A major plot point part at the half-way mark centers around the awkward romance of the captain and a young, perky “scraddle” operator (see above), who's revealed during a dinner date to be “A Christian.” More accurately, a born-again Christian. She finger-wags the captain like he’s somehow defective without her faith, and she later Bible-splains to one of the Amish about how their faith community has misinterpreted the Bible and Jesus’ teachings. The air of superiority about it is almost annoying as the fact that this plot point dies a couple of chapters later and is never heard from again.
While I have no objections to a Christian character or that of any other faith, Mr. Nietz and his publisher make it clear this is a key reason for the book's existence. Had I known of the evangelical nature of this book, I would not have chosen to read it. This could have been made clearer in the marketing description.
DUBIOUS PROMOTION & ETHICAL CHALLENGES
Reviews on Amazon and Goodreads are heavily represented by people who were given review copies. While reviewers generally disclose this, a number of the reviews appear highly dubious. One reviewer on Amazon gushes about Mr. Nietz's "customary finesse and mastery of language and storytelling." This statement is completely at odds with the quality of workmanship on this novel, to anyone who has ever read more than five books. Something smells rotten here...
Even more disturbing, The Kindle version contains a personal appeal from the author, asking readers to fight criticism of his book. Here’s the entire text, verbatim from Kindle:
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
“HELP PROVE THEM WRONG!
It probably won't surprise you to learn that this book has endured a fair share of ridicule. ....
How could someone throw such diverse concept into a story together and make it work? ....
... the majority of those who actually read the book are surprised by what they find: a thoughtful, informed, and enjoyable tale.
If you're one of those people -- if this book met or exceeded your expectations in any way, please consider telling your friends....”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It appears the author does not understand the difference between outlandish subject matter and the poor quality of his writing. To be clear, I bought the book for the former; my beef is with the latter.
PRINT EDITION
I don't like to read electronically due to eye strain, so I bought the print copy. The cover is the best thing about this book. The typesetting of the book itself is atrocious. Think "copy/paste" with no formatting. No attention to typeface, margin setting, line spacing in the body. The page numbers are ridiculously miniscule.
CONCLUSION
The writing stinks to high heaven, the book's marketing is border-line fraudulent, the religious proselytizing is insulting to believers who actually study their faiths. It's a crap-fest of epic proportions. I would consider buying the author a thesaurus and beating him with it, were it not for the fact that I'm out $18 for this stupid, stupid, stupid, pointless garbage.
August 28, 2021
I expected this to be the literary equivalent of a campy SyFy movie: self-aware of its own ridiculous premise and playing it up accordingly. I was also prepared to enjoy it on those terms because I like that sort of thing.
Instead, not only is the book earnest, it’s also actually good.
How does a community of Amish end up encountering vampires, and how do they end up doing it in space? The author builds a universe that slowly brings each of these pieces together. I really do mean universe, because it involves a system of planets that resemble Earth, a cargo spaceship with a pre-arranged deal with our Amish protagonists, and an infectious package already on the ship that causes havoc after becoming open. These are each laid out with care and attention in order for them to come together.
This is a fun and original story, and a pleasant surprise. The author clearly did his homework on the Amish and on sci-fi concepts. My single gripe is that his writing style involves an overuse of sentence fragments, but it wasn’t enough to diminish my enjoyment of the book.
Instead, not only is the book earnest, it’s also actually good.
How does a community of Amish end up encountering vampires, and how do they end up doing it in space? The author builds a universe that slowly brings each of these pieces together. I really do mean universe, because it involves a system of planets that resemble Earth, a cargo spaceship with a pre-arranged deal with our Amish protagonists, and an infectious package already on the ship that causes havoc after becoming open. These are each laid out with care and attention in order for them to come together.
This is a fun and original story, and a pleasant surprise. The author clearly did his homework on the Amish and on sci-fi concepts. My single gripe is that his writing style involves an overuse of sentence fragments, but it wasn’t enough to diminish my enjoyment of the book.
October 20, 2019
I literally don’t know how this book has such good ratings. The title and topic seem like they would make for an awesome book, but alas the author delivers a long-winded, excruciatingly slow-paced, dull book with a horrible depiction of the Amish. Also the writing style was not for me, and made this bad book even worse. So. Many. Sentence. Fragments.
October 18, 2019
What a terrible book - terribly written, way too long, the men are all garbage. It’s just bad.
November 12, 2019
VERY CREATIVE!
I won a paperback copy of this book during a Goodreads giveaway. I am under no obligation to leave a review or rating and do so voluntarily. So that others may also enjoy this book, I am paying it forward by donating it to my local library.
I won a paperback copy of this book during a Goodreads giveaway. I am under no obligation to leave a review or rating and do so voluntarily. So that others may also enjoy this book, I am paying it forward by donating it to my local library.
August 19, 2021
Do you like the kind of books, movies, shows so bad, but so bad that they instantly become good?
Have you ever had an experience where a friend shows up out of nowhere and tells you "enter in the car, get this gun and this bag of money, I'll explain later"?
Well, me neither, and although we (probably) don't know each other and I don't have a bag of money or a gun, for the sake of the argument trust me on this and stop everything you're doing and go read this book.
You can thank me later.
Have you ever had an experience where a friend shows up out of nowhere and tells you "enter in the car, get this gun and this bag of money, I'll explain later"?
Well, me neither, and although we (probably) don't know each other and I don't have a bag of money or a gun, for the sake of the argument trust me on this and stop everything you're doing and go read this book.
You can thank me later.
November 9, 2019
As you can see from the other reviews, the subject isn't a joke, and there's no camp, and very little humor at all, involved. Nietz plays it straight, as Christian sci-fi. And the plot is actually reasonably plausible, given the subject matter.
But it's not a very good book. It could have been decent, with more revisions, editing, and care. It's about twice as long as it needs to be. Too many pointless descriptions and dead-end plot diversions.
It's too bad the author didn't try for at least a little bit of humor. There were enough silly passages where it seems like he was approaching being funny, and then shied back from the abyss. For example, there's a passage with a vampsheep that sucks a chicken's blood, thereby creating a vampchicken. I don't know how that's even possible, but there is all sorts of fun that could be had here.
Sample quote: "... Congi's eyes. They were dark. Incredibly handsome. Like tiny holes."
But it's not a very good book. It could have been decent, with more revisions, editing, and care. It's about twice as long as it needs to be. Too many pointless descriptions and dead-end plot diversions.
It's too bad the author didn't try for at least a little bit of humor. There were enough silly passages where it seems like he was approaching being funny, and then shied back from the abyss. For example, there's a passage with a vampsheep that sucks a chicken's blood, thereby creating a vampchicken. I don't know how that's even possible, but there is all sorts of fun that could be had here.
Sample quote: "... Congi's eyes. They were dark. Incredibly handsome. Like tiny holes."
January 20, 2025
I've been wanting to read this one for years, and I recently noticed it was available in audiobook, so I indulged. And it was fun! It felt like one of the better Star Trek episodes. Not "Darmok" or "The Inner Light," but the next tier down from those. Another reviewer got bent out of shape about the inaccurate representation of the Amish, but really...are you going to read this book for anthropological accuracy any more than you'd watch Star Trek for scientific accuracy? Not if you're sensible. But if you can lighten up and suspend your disbelief for a bit, you just might enjoy yourself. There's a sequel, Amish Zombies from Space. If that ever makes it to audio, I just might check it out.
Narrator was mostly OK.
Narrator was mostly OK.
October 26, 2013
It may sound like a joke, but this book is excellent. It's easy to imagine that a group of Amish would take the chance to leave the "English" behind and set up their own planet. But what would happen if those Amish then had to abandon their colony? What would happen to the person who decided that he had to call for help? And what if the ship that picked them up carried...well, I won't get into that. Spoilers.
I simply devoured this book. It is really, really fun!
I simply devoured this book. It is really, really fun!
October 19, 2019
I read this as part of a book club. We thought it might be entertaining because, although the plot sounds terrible, the reviews were good. This book is boring, slow and wooden. The writing is repetitive and dull. Even when the action finally starts, it is slow and dry.
Spare yourself.
Spare yourself.
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