What do you think?
Rate this book
335 pages, Hardcover
First published June 1, 2013
One place had an amazing guest room, but that was a deal breaker for Ice. Great guest rooms are so welcoming that they encourage people to stay awhile, and Ice found that problematic. He said he wanted his guest room to express the sentiment, “Don’t get too comfortable here; motherfuckers need to leave.”
Of course, she does take a break from tales of Fido humping the ottoman to cover her next favorite topic - her rear-end. It sweats, gets bitten by fire ants, gets nudged off the couch by one of her not at all dormant-psychotic pit bulls, gets new underpants and does a lot of...well...you have one so you know. Again, if you crave tales of posterior but not in a suggestive way, this is the book for you.
Lancaster does weave in just enough Martha Stewart talk to justify the book's derivative premise. Largely, this revolves around parties (Jen ordered too many hot dogs, que lastima!), and home improvement (Fletch - her husband - bought a rototiller - que lastima!) Cynical readers will wonder why they just don't read Martha directly rather than Lancaster's secondary source interpretation of her dictates but these are the same worry-wart people who feel pit bulls as a species have statistically proven themselves to be dangerous that crossing the street to avoid them is not phobia so much as playing the probabilities. Generally speaking, given Jen works at home we spend nearly the entire book following her from on pet-hair covered room to another.
The books writing style follows the standard blogger first person unadorned reportage. This style with its lack of literary conventions such as foreshadowing and plot progression has inherent limitations as seen in the entire sub-genre (see I Suck at Girls). Lancaster's kung fu is no better or worse than the average and she occasionally produces the occasional laugh. But catch those laughs while you can as they are largely based on topical humor that will age quickly (there are a lot of "Real Housewives" references - (The Real Housewives Get Personal).
In short, one imagines Martha will not find this journeyman effort to be quite up to her own persnickety standards and neither should you.