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Still Life With Brass Pole
Craig is 16 when he returns from a drug-fueled visit with his dad in Miami to find his mom leaving town with her 23 year-old boyfriend. In the same moment, his dreams of settling down with his pregnant girlfriend are dashed when she is moved off to Texas by her parents. Left alone in small town Oklahoma, he embarks on a deranged, cross-country quest for a family of his own. STILL LIFE WITH BRASS POLE is Craig Machen’s funny, debauched and heartfelt memoir about young love and coming of age in the titillation business. And how a roaring White Knight Complex, an eccentric comedy club owner, and a trio of unpredictable striptease artists conspire to help him achieve his aims.REVIEW"Still Life With Brass Pole" is the product of a great story teller with a great story to tell. Craig Machen’s earnest and brutally honest recounting of his teenage search for love and family is weird, hilarious, fast paced, upbeat and straight from the heart. An absolute joy to read." -- Curtis Grippe, The Arizona Republic"Still Life with Brass Pole" has its own unique charm and is a read that should strongly be considered." -- Carl Logan, The Midwest Book Review"Still Life With Brass Pole" is Craig Machen's remarkable memoir about coming-of-age as a strip club bouncer, finding his way amidst a culture of sex, alcohol and drug abuse, and dysfunction, and finally realizing his dream of becoming a dad. Still Life is above all, a story of personal redemption, and what struck me most about it was the heart, humor, honesty, and compassion with which Craig writes.”-- Jennifer M. Kaufman, Books, Personally & The Best Damn Book Blog
280 pages, Kindle Edition
First published April 27, 2011
19 people are currently reading
611 people want to read
About the author
Craig Machen
2 books56 followersCraig Machen was raised on and off in Oklahoma, with stops along the southeast coast of Florida and central Arizona. A life long book, movie, and rock-n-roll fan, he got his start, and a healthy dose of inspiration, working concert security in high school, and later from a college job at the Improv Comedy Clubs in Tempe and San Diego.
After graduation, Craig moved his young family to Los Angeles and became a story analyst for Miramax, New Regency, Jersey Films, Robert Redford’s Wildwood Productions, Turner Pictures and finally the Jim Henson Company, where he got his break as a screenwriter.
A new career as a professional writer allowed him to be a stay at home dad while his kids were growing up, which has easily been the greatest joy of his life.
In 15 years of writing for Hollywood, Craig has worked for Ben Stiller’s Red Hour Films, Ivan Reitman’s Montecito Pictures, the WB, Jim Henson Pictures, Warner Brothers TV, Paramount Television, Spelling Television, Tollin-Robbins Productions, VH-1, Viacom, 20th Century Fox, DreamWorks, and many others. He also wrote the award winning movie WASTED for MTV, and the Zac Efron show SUMMERLAND.
In 2010, as his oldest son was preparing to head off to college in Oklahoma, Craig turned away from screenwriting and began his new memoir, STILL LIFE WITH BRASS POLE. At its heart, it's about the things that made him want to be a dad, but the logline is basically, "Young love and coming of age in the strip clubs." Part love story, part maturation tome, and part deconstruction of the titillation business, Still Life With Brass Pole is a funny, debauched, and totally heartfelt story about a kid with roaring White Knight Complex on a demented quest for a family of his own.
Craig is currently hammering away again in Hollywood, and spending down time walking his hound, surfing, working out, playing guitar, and composing a shorter bio. Craig holds an unused Marketing degree from Arizona State University. His diploma is signed by former governor and convicted felon, Fife Symington.
After graduation, Craig moved his young family to Los Angeles and became a story analyst for Miramax, New Regency, Jersey Films, Robert Redford’s Wildwood Productions, Turner Pictures and finally the Jim Henson Company, where he got his break as a screenwriter.
A new career as a professional writer allowed him to be a stay at home dad while his kids were growing up, which has easily been the greatest joy of his life.
In 15 years of writing for Hollywood, Craig has worked for Ben Stiller’s Red Hour Films, Ivan Reitman’s Montecito Pictures, the WB, Jim Henson Pictures, Warner Brothers TV, Paramount Television, Spelling Television, Tollin-Robbins Productions, VH-1, Viacom, 20th Century Fox, DreamWorks, and many others. He also wrote the award winning movie WASTED for MTV, and the Zac Efron show SUMMERLAND.
In 2010, as his oldest son was preparing to head off to college in Oklahoma, Craig turned away from screenwriting and began his new memoir, STILL LIFE WITH BRASS POLE. At its heart, it's about the things that made him want to be a dad, but the logline is basically, "Young love and coming of age in the strip clubs." Part love story, part maturation tome, and part deconstruction of the titillation business, Still Life With Brass Pole is a funny, debauched, and totally heartfelt story about a kid with roaring White Knight Complex on a demented quest for a family of his own.
Craig is currently hammering away again in Hollywood, and spending down time walking his hound, surfing, working out, playing guitar, and composing a shorter bio. Craig holds an unused Marketing degree from Arizona State University. His diploma is signed by former governor and convicted felon, Fife Symington.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 64 reviews
August 28, 2011
I am so familiar with the parts of Oklahoma, California, and Arizona that Craig refers to in this book. The first two years I lived in Phoenix I spent most of my time on Thomas Road. I lived on Thomas Road in a crapola set of apartments called Sunnyside or Sunset or Sunrise. One of those places that nearly every night had the flashing blue lights of a cop car in the parking lot. I went to college at Phoenix College off of Thomas Road. I worked in a bookstore at a mall just down the road from Thomas Mall or the dying mall as we refered to it then. So anyway, I had a little jolt when Craig mentioned Thomas Mall.
Once you start this book, you just keep compulsively turning the pages. It must have been very cathartic and painful to write these pages. Craig does not spare any punches. He is critical of himself, his decisions, and his failures. He explains how he got where he is, recognizing the adverse effect that people had on his life so we as the readers can lay blame at the feet of those people, but Craig doesn't. At the point in time that he wrote this book, he can look at those people with more objectivity, a luxury that time and distance has provided. There is a point in everyone's life when they have to take responsibility for their life and quit making excuses for themselves. The reward of the book is seeing Craig go through that process and eventually take control of his life and steer it in a more productive direction.
Once you start this book, you just keep compulsively turning the pages. It must have been very cathartic and painful to write these pages. Craig does not spare any punches. He is critical of himself, his decisions, and his failures. He explains how he got where he is, recognizing the adverse effect that people had on his life so we as the readers can lay blame at the feet of those people, but Craig doesn't. At the point in time that he wrote this book, he can look at those people with more objectivity, a luxury that time and distance has provided. There is a point in everyone's life when they have to take responsibility for their life and quit making excuses for themselves. The reward of the book is seeing Craig go through that process and eventually take control of his life and steer it in a more productive direction.
April 30, 2011
If enough people keep lamenting the lack of the 1/2 star option in the ratings system, will goodreads stick one in there?
...because I so want to give this book 4 1/2!
This is precisely one of the reasons I love this website-- connecting with people, making the large world a bit smaller, finding commonality with others in not only their love of reading, but writing as well.
Enter Craig Machen.
A friend request accepted, a simple "introduction," conversation about writing, a segue into "Oh, by the way, I have a memoir coming out..."
I bit.
Am I glad I did.
I do not generally read a LOT of auto-biographies. I'm more apt to read biographies of people from history. But something about Craig's blurb racheted my attention level up to "intrigued and curious."
Very few books can compel me to remain seated and inhale them in basically one sitting.
This one did.
Effortlessly.
I'm trying to grasp what sucked me in so thoroughly. The prose was great-- I loved his innate story-telling ability while weaving in these thoughtful, profound lines here and there. Truly beautiful. It made me wish I was reading the paperback version, so I could dogear those pages and go back and reread those portions. (yeah, someday I'll figure out how to do that on this silly Kindle...)
I think a goodly portion of my intrigue was from the sheer foreign feel to his life. Like watching a somewhat disturbing film play out before you-- where you can't believe what's happening, what continues to happen, and why you want to keep watching.
But there's something there ... something in the protagonist's flawed and messy life and circumstances which speak to you. Resonates with you on some similar, if not identical, level.
If I may be so bold ... Craig, I'd better hear soon that you're working on a novel!
...because I so want to give this book 4 1/2!
This is precisely one of the reasons I love this website-- connecting with people, making the large world a bit smaller, finding commonality with others in not only their love of reading, but writing as well.
Enter Craig Machen.
A friend request accepted, a simple "introduction," conversation about writing, a segue into "Oh, by the way, I have a memoir coming out..."
I bit.
Am I glad I did.
I do not generally read a LOT of auto-biographies. I'm more apt to read biographies of people from history. But something about Craig's blurb racheted my attention level up to "intrigued and curious."
Very few books can compel me to remain seated and inhale them in basically one sitting.
This one did.
Effortlessly.
I'm trying to grasp what sucked me in so thoroughly. The prose was great-- I loved his innate story-telling ability while weaving in these thoughtful, profound lines here and there. Truly beautiful. It made me wish I was reading the paperback version, so I could dogear those pages and go back and reread those portions. (yeah, someday I'll figure out how to do that on this silly Kindle...)
I think a goodly portion of my intrigue was from the sheer foreign feel to his life. Like watching a somewhat disturbing film play out before you-- where you can't believe what's happening, what continues to happen, and why you want to keep watching.
But there's something there ... something in the protagonist's flawed and messy life and circumstances which speak to you. Resonates with you on some similar, if not identical, level.
If I may be so bold ... Craig, I'd better hear soon that you're working on a novel!
May 19, 2011
Per aspera ad astra!
I read this book twice and fell in love with that lovable, romantic soul.
This Biographic Book is about Craig's search for a place to call home and someone to love, and who will love him back, unconditionally. He is also looking for the classic answers we all look for when we're young. Who am I, why am I here, will I be like my parents, when I grow up? Only in his case, with the adoption, the neglegtion, the abandon you feel them being twice as corroding on his soul.
But by growing older, smarter, and more sober he manages to find those answers and through them, ultimately unveils his true self. Sir Lancelot!
While reading you just can't stop thinking, this boy had so much love to give, despite having received so few. Where does he take it from? The book ultimately also raises the question why some people adopt at all.
The story itself is captivating and heartwarming. Its deeply and hopefully romantic.
The metaphors in the book are funny, witty, creative. The anecdotes are truthful, unpretentious, honest.
The writing shows real talent! I am certain that we can expect great things from Craig Machen in the future.
All in all, this has become one of my favorite books. I can totally recommend it! And if you, Ladies, do not fall a tiny little bit for Craig after this, I do not know...
I read this book twice and fell in love with that lovable, romantic soul.
This Biographic Book is about Craig's search for a place to call home and someone to love, and who will love him back, unconditionally. He is also looking for the classic answers we all look for when we're young. Who am I, why am I here, will I be like my parents, when I grow up? Only in his case, with the adoption, the neglegtion, the abandon you feel them being twice as corroding on his soul.
But by growing older, smarter, and more sober he manages to find those answers and through them, ultimately unveils his true self. Sir Lancelot!
While reading you just can't stop thinking, this boy had so much love to give, despite having received so few. Where does he take it from? The book ultimately also raises the question why some people adopt at all.
The story itself is captivating and heartwarming. Its deeply and hopefully romantic.
The metaphors in the book are funny, witty, creative. The anecdotes are truthful, unpretentious, honest.
The writing shows real talent! I am certain that we can expect great things from Craig Machen in the future.
All in all, this has become one of my favorite books. I can totally recommend it! And if you, Ladies, do not fall a tiny little bit for Craig after this, I do not know...
June 20, 2011
Still Life With Brass Pole is one of the most genuine memoirs I've ever read, and it kept me turning pages at a breakneck speed. Craig's storytelling and prose hooked me from the very beginning, and I couldn't wait to read what happened next. He pulls no punches and he makes no excuses, and you'll be rooting for him from the very start. The narrative is engaging, highly intelligent, and just plain entertaining. At times it's also laugh out loud hysterical.
The book opens with Craig's first exposure to a strip club (at his dad's directive). The positive and negative aspects of strip clubs, and Craig's later employment at them, is a theme that's woven seamlessly throughout the book (reminding me a bit of Diablo Cody's Candy Girl). Craig is a hero on a white horse and girls that need rescuing are plentiful in every club he's a part of. It is with remarkable insight that Craig realizes what he really hopes to find is a girl he can marry and start a family with.
I didn't want this book to end, yet I wanted Craig to find his happily ever after. His life could have turned out much differently, and it's a testament to his character and resilence that he rose above the obstacles in his path so beautifully.
Still Life With Brass Pole is a book I'll read over and over again.
The book opens with Craig's first exposure to a strip club (at his dad's directive). The positive and negative aspects of strip clubs, and Craig's later employment at them, is a theme that's woven seamlessly throughout the book (reminding me a bit of Diablo Cody's Candy Girl). Craig is a hero on a white horse and girls that need rescuing are plentiful in every club he's a part of. It is with remarkable insight that Craig realizes what he really hopes to find is a girl he can marry and start a family with.
I didn't want this book to end, yet I wanted Craig to find his happily ever after. His life could have turned out much differently, and it's a testament to his character and resilence that he rose above the obstacles in his path so beautifully.
Still Life With Brass Pole is a book I'll read over and over again.
May 19, 2011
In his coming of age memoir Still Life With Brass Pole, screenwriter Craig Machen wastes no time elucidating his pull into the strip club culture. “I swear I can feel the heartbreak and anger and frustration and sex reaching out to me through those windowless walls,” he says. His urge to belong is palpable, and for some time he finds a home here, within the walls of strip clubs. With his raw voice and beautiful candor, Machen takes us into his culture, revealing what attracts its inhabitants, their psychological make up, and his place in it all. Born to adoptive parents who divorce (one of whom is abusive towards the young Machen) and navigating the world of sex, drugs and steroids, it’s a miracle that the narrator at an early age is able to transcend his given world.
Machen’s true foray into strip clubs begins when he is hired as a bouncer. During this stint, he encounters various women in and out of the trade, and takes us into their interior lives. There are times that he is a “full-blown sex junkie,” and doesn’t hold back to share that facet of himself. All along, Machen has turned to bodybuilding as his lodestar, “Thank God for bodybuilding,” he says. “It keeps me sane and gives me a sense of direction.” Arnold Schwarzenegger is his model for focus and discipline, as the narrator is in awe of his story from humble beginnings to superstar status.
Though Machen thrives in the strip club scene at first, the lust for it all begins to fade when he realizes that its inhabitants are on a “demented quest for intimacy,” which can only lead to loss. “This kind of sleaziness is a tar pit,” he says, “and no amount of rationalizing turns a cesspool into the Blue Lagoon.” Plus, Machen is now aware that he’s on a “self improvement project” to better himself, find a woman he can marry, have a child, and “walk in the light.”
Machen is immensely likable, brimming with keen observations and wise assessments about relationships and our deeper, darker drives. His story is at times hilariously funny, other times starkly stirring. The compassion he shows those he encounters on his path, whether friend of foe, is laudable. Particularly touching is his devotion to his younger sister Emily, who is caught in the dysfunctional relationship of her parents. It reminded me of Holden Caulfield’s care for his younger sister Phoebe in The Catcher in the Rye. For Machen, life is a good place, and even within the walls of the sex business, there is something really beautiful to find. It’s like the blue water lily that emerges from the swampy, murky ponds. What that beauty is, you will have to read to find out for yourself.
Machen’s true foray into strip clubs begins when he is hired as a bouncer. During this stint, he encounters various women in and out of the trade, and takes us into their interior lives. There are times that he is a “full-blown sex junkie,” and doesn’t hold back to share that facet of himself. All along, Machen has turned to bodybuilding as his lodestar, “Thank God for bodybuilding,” he says. “It keeps me sane and gives me a sense of direction.” Arnold Schwarzenegger is his model for focus and discipline, as the narrator is in awe of his story from humble beginnings to superstar status.
Though Machen thrives in the strip club scene at first, the lust for it all begins to fade when he realizes that its inhabitants are on a “demented quest for intimacy,” which can only lead to loss. “This kind of sleaziness is a tar pit,” he says, “and no amount of rationalizing turns a cesspool into the Blue Lagoon.” Plus, Machen is now aware that he’s on a “self improvement project” to better himself, find a woman he can marry, have a child, and “walk in the light.”
Machen is immensely likable, brimming with keen observations and wise assessments about relationships and our deeper, darker drives. His story is at times hilariously funny, other times starkly stirring. The compassion he shows those he encounters on his path, whether friend of foe, is laudable. Particularly touching is his devotion to his younger sister Emily, who is caught in the dysfunctional relationship of her parents. It reminded me of Holden Caulfield’s care for his younger sister Phoebe in The Catcher in the Rye. For Machen, life is a good place, and even within the walls of the sex business, there is something really beautiful to find. It’s like the blue water lily that emerges from the swampy, murky ponds. What that beauty is, you will have to read to find out for yourself.
June 30, 2011
The names have been changed to protect the not so innocent in Craig Machen's coming-of-age memoir Still Life With Brass Pole. If this were set in the 19th century the main character (Craig) would be an ideal rake, and his familiar behavior equal to a royal norm. However, this is contemporary, and with it comes the dys in functional. The narrative from the get-go is delivered in a direct, no-nonsense beating. Oh, it's heartfelt -- but for those who require their memoirs be delivered with kid gloves in purple prose and with kind, clearly marked reminiscing flashbacks -- get off the train now because it's about to derail. Machen offers little or no excuse in his re-telling and by doing so, elevates the authority of the story while spreading blame evenly. It's this insightful manner and self-reflection that drives the disastrous journey toward a white-light of hope ending. Many will be able to relate to the stumble and bumble through early life account and embarrassing anecdotes of underwear. It'll make you scratch your head while conjuring wise, old phrases like, 'everything happens for a reason,' and 'I had to go through the things I did to arrive where I am.' It might even inspire you to break out into a soulful rendition of 'My Way,' the Sid Vicious version. I must say I walked away from the book more of a genius than when I arrived. I like to thank Machen, for now I truly understand the complex and self-destructive muck bubble of Eminem and Kim Mathers relationship (and all those suffering a similar fate). We all want to rescue and be rescued -- who doesn't fantasize about becoming a hero to someone? If you've ever asked, "Why do girls date (insert expletive)? Why do they go for the bad guy? Or reversa if you willa -- this book is for you. It should answer the question and if you're still confused by the end, go to the beginning and start all over because obviously you weren't paying attention!
June 15, 2011
Bottom line: I highly recommend this book! An expertly crafted memoir by Craig Machen, STILL LIFE WITH BRASS POLE chronicles a teenager's journey through unsettling family dysfunction, and the domino effect it has on his young life. Immediately engaging with candid, funny and fearless prose, Machen paints incredibly visceral moments peppered with wisdom; the kind only possible after years of distance and maturity.
The narrative opens with the 16 year old author's dilemma: accept his father's coked-up invitation to a nudie bar, or stay true to his High School sweetheart back home. "God I love nudity! But I love you so much more..." And so begins his dive down the strip club rabbit hole, where he eventually works and navigates intense personal relationships with several dancers.
As a skinny kid who was beat up by the football team and his stepfather, Machen finds confidence in bodybuilding. His new hero, Arnold Schwarzenegger, teaches him to visualize. "I see myself as an invincible mountain of muscles whom no man dares to cross, and no woman dares to leave... " which may be the crux of the story. After being abandoned and abused in unthinkable ways, Machen's goals make sense: to protect himself (and others), and to somehow create relationships guaranteed to last. Of course, immersed in a world of drinking, cocaine, pot, steroids and strippers, he has his work cut out for him.
Although I personally have not frequented "naked lady emporiums," I was surprised at how easy it was to relate to Machen's experiences. Whatever messy situation he's into, his intentions are good, and thus he is a joy to root for. And thankfully, he does triumph! "I want to express myself in a way that's interesting to others, and hopefully make my living in the process," he says, as he ultimately finds inspiration in a comedy club job. Well, one only has to read his author bio to see this goal has been achieved. In his screenwriting career, Machen has worked for every big studio in Hollywood, while also managing to pen his first, beautiful memoir. But STILL LIFE WITH BRASS POLE is less about a professional quest than a personal one, and in that sense, the uplifting conclusion is sure to satisfy anyone wise enough to read the entirety of this poignant, heartfelt tale.
The narrative opens with the 16 year old author's dilemma: accept his father's coked-up invitation to a nudie bar, or stay true to his High School sweetheart back home. "God I love nudity! But I love you so much more..." And so begins his dive down the strip club rabbit hole, where he eventually works and navigates intense personal relationships with several dancers.
As a skinny kid who was beat up by the football team and his stepfather, Machen finds confidence in bodybuilding. His new hero, Arnold Schwarzenegger, teaches him to visualize. "I see myself as an invincible mountain of muscles whom no man dares to cross, and no woman dares to leave... " which may be the crux of the story. After being abandoned and abused in unthinkable ways, Machen's goals make sense: to protect himself (and others), and to somehow create relationships guaranteed to last. Of course, immersed in a world of drinking, cocaine, pot, steroids and strippers, he has his work cut out for him.
Although I personally have not frequented "naked lady emporiums," I was surprised at how easy it was to relate to Machen's experiences. Whatever messy situation he's into, his intentions are good, and thus he is a joy to root for. And thankfully, he does triumph! "I want to express myself in a way that's interesting to others, and hopefully make my living in the process," he says, as he ultimately finds inspiration in a comedy club job. Well, one only has to read his author bio to see this goal has been achieved. In his screenwriting career, Machen has worked for every big studio in Hollywood, while also managing to pen his first, beautiful memoir. But STILL LIFE WITH BRASS POLE is less about a professional quest than a personal one, and in that sense, the uplifting conclusion is sure to satisfy anyone wise enough to read the entirety of this poignant, heartfelt tale.
September 7, 2011
Still Life with Brass Pole is described on the back cover as a “a heartfelt memoir about young love and coming of age in the titillation business.” You hear that and ask, “Why the hell would I want to read a memoir of somebody that is not a big time celebrity?” It’s a fair enough question and one that I asked myself. Quite frankly, the words “heartfelt” and “coming of age,” bring to mind some sort of Lifetime made for TV movie and tend to turn me away usually. But, Craig Machen’s Still Life with Brass Pole proved to be much more than I expected from the back cover blurb. Craig is no celebrity, but he has written award-winning screenplays and now he has decided to become an author. And his memoir is really very good. He details his experience with substance abuse, fucked up relationships, and working as a bouncer in titty bars. Maybe Craig isn’t famous (yet), but he is a good writer and he tells his story with a nice sprinkling of humor. Why should you read his book? I guess because it shows that a pretty fucked up kid can straighten his life out and make something of himself (at least that was something that I found that I could relate to). And it has strippers.
I enjoyed Craig’s book and would love to see him try his hand at fiction. If he were to incorporate his experiences into a novel and perhaps exaggerate some of them a bit, it would make for great fiction. There were points in Still Life where I wanted to see things go a different way. I wanted to see Craig bust out in a steroid rage and body slam his abusive stepfather. But I realized that Craig was providing an honest narrative of his experience instead of trying to overdramatize it. That honesty comes through in the writing and the book is better for it. Machen is a talented author and I look forward to reading more of his work.
I enjoyed Craig’s book and would love to see him try his hand at fiction. If he were to incorporate his experiences into a novel and perhaps exaggerate some of them a bit, it would make for great fiction. There were points in Still Life where I wanted to see things go a different way. I wanted to see Craig bust out in a steroid rage and body slam his abusive stepfather. But I realized that Craig was providing an honest narrative of his experience instead of trying to overdramatize it. That honesty comes through in the writing and the book is better for it. Machen is a talented author and I look forward to reading more of his work.
March 2, 2012
In the opening scene, the 16-year-old narrator is drunk, does a line of cocaine at a party he's at with a bunch of 40-year-olds and then goes to an all-nude gentlemen’s club. With his dad. Who is gay. Say whaaaaaat?
My initial reaction was disbelief, because wasn’t this supposed to be an autobiographical memoir? And if so, why was it starting with something that, to my mind, comes straight from the depraved pit of fantasy that is a teenage boy’s imagination? And then I felt an unsettling mixture of disappointment and disgust because it seemed that I’d just gotten myself into another steaming pile of WTF, courtesy of yet another Goodreads author.
My skepticism was further enhanced by the fact that this was a free Kindle download, which have a proven sub-par to truly awful record most of the time and at their rare best, are occasionally mediocre. Add to the fact that the ratings are quite high and the author is a Goodreads author and I immediately leapt to the (not illogical) conclusion that the other reviews weren’t real and/or couldn’t be trusted and I know you know what I mean.
With all that said, this was a surprisingly satisfying read that was hard to put down. When my son is older and develops the depraved imagination of a teenage boy, this is the kind of book I’d like him to read. And as soon as he gets over the squick factor of having his mom recommend a book where drug use, casual sex, drunk driving, strippers, theft, and a blatant disregard for authority are the norm, it would be my hope that he’d see the underlying message in this author’s story, that no matter where you come from and no matter what you do to fuck your own life up, every experience is an opportunity for learning and that life is what you make it.
My initial reaction was disbelief, because wasn’t this supposed to be an autobiographical memoir? And if so, why was it starting with something that, to my mind, comes straight from the depraved pit of fantasy that is a teenage boy’s imagination? And then I felt an unsettling mixture of disappointment and disgust because it seemed that I’d just gotten myself into another steaming pile of WTF, courtesy of yet another Goodreads author.
My skepticism was further enhanced by the fact that this was a free Kindle download, which have a proven sub-par to truly awful record most of the time and at their rare best, are occasionally mediocre. Add to the fact that the ratings are quite high and the author is a Goodreads author and I immediately leapt to the (not illogical) conclusion that the other reviews weren’t real and/or couldn’t be trusted and I know you know what I mean.
With all that said, this was a surprisingly satisfying read that was hard to put down. When my son is older and develops the depraved imagination of a teenage boy, this is the kind of book I’d like him to read. And as soon as he gets over the squick factor of having his mom recommend a book where drug use, casual sex, drunk driving, strippers, theft, and a blatant disregard for authority are the norm, it would be my hope that he’d see the underlying message in this author’s story, that no matter where you come from and no matter what you do to fuck your own life up, every experience is an opportunity for learning and that life is what you make it.
December 14, 2011
This was a funny and interesting book. It is supposed to be his autobiography. I found it to be very easy to read and some parts of it were totally hilarious. I enjoyed the book. I found it to be something that I would read again.
It starts with his childhood and the first time he goes into a strip club as a teen. It goes on until he is an adult and having children of his own. He finishes high school and goes to college. He pays his way through college working as a bouncer in strip clubs. This book tells a lot more about his life than I am here. It is a very interesting book because most people do not have a life like this.
I won this book in a goodreads giveaway and found it to be engaging and interesting. I would recommend it to anyone.
It starts with his childhood and the first time he goes into a strip club as a teen. It goes on until he is an adult and having children of his own. He finishes high school and goes to college. He pays his way through college working as a bouncer in strip clubs. This book tells a lot more about his life than I am here. It is a very interesting book because most people do not have a life like this.
I won this book in a goodreads giveaway and found it to be engaging and interesting. I would recommend it to anyone.
June 11, 2024
So I was on this hell ride of new release fiction that was both tragic and terrible. Tragic because I actually tried to read a stack of new releases that were just awful and terrible because people constantly prop those books up in reviews.
In an effort to get away from crap fiction, which should be an actual category, I started asking around to find great books. So I go to one of my closest friends and I ask, "What's the best book you've read lately?"
"Still Life with Brass Pole."
"Huh. Really?"
"Really."
So I bought it and started it and he was right. It is an amazing book. Then I moved across the US and then I moved across the US again and then I signed up for the Goodreads deal of the day, which in all honesty should come with a warning label. So 286 books later and I am not joking, I am looking for my next read and changed my settings and here was this book. Again.
I'd probably read a 1/3 of it but a testament to how good it is, I remembered all of it. I was so ready for a good book that I blazed through it. It is that good. As an author I am, perhaps, more critical of books than others. I know when writers are being lazy, when they are pandering, when they take short cuts. This book has none of that. It is tightly crafted, extremely well written, dynamic in subject matter and for a book that is largely about a young man coming of age, it can be quite the page turner.
But probably the most stand out part is that in a book that is almost all about sex, there is no sex. A lesser writer would have taken a different route. A good third of the book is about the author working in topless bars and the relationships that derail him and in many ways make him who he is but he manages to leave the sex out. For that alone I am grateful because I think I am the only person on planet earth who doesn't like sex scenes in books. They are weird and awkward to me and it is not my thing. There is swearing for those of you who don't like swearing. I'm totally f**king okay with the swearing.
So that is my review. If you want a truly great book to read, this is the one. You'll blaze through it like you're on fire and come out the other side wishing all writers could achieve this level of honesty and brilliance.
In an effort to get away from crap fiction, which should be an actual category, I started asking around to find great books. So I go to one of my closest friends and I ask, "What's the best book you've read lately?"
"Still Life with Brass Pole."
"Huh. Really?"
"Really."
So I bought it and started it and he was right. It is an amazing book. Then I moved across the US and then I moved across the US again and then I signed up for the Goodreads deal of the day, which in all honesty should come with a warning label. So 286 books later and I am not joking, I am looking for my next read and changed my settings and here was this book. Again.
I'd probably read a 1/3 of it but a testament to how good it is, I remembered all of it. I was so ready for a good book that I blazed through it. It is that good. As an author I am, perhaps, more critical of books than others. I know when writers are being lazy, when they are pandering, when they take short cuts. This book has none of that. It is tightly crafted, extremely well written, dynamic in subject matter and for a book that is largely about a young man coming of age, it can be quite the page turner.
But probably the most stand out part is that in a book that is almost all about sex, there is no sex. A lesser writer would have taken a different route. A good third of the book is about the author working in topless bars and the relationships that derail him and in many ways make him who he is but he manages to leave the sex out. For that alone I am grateful because I think I am the only person on planet earth who doesn't like sex scenes in books. They are weird and awkward to me and it is not my thing. There is swearing for those of you who don't like swearing. I'm totally f**king okay with the swearing.
So that is my review. If you want a truly great book to read, this is the one. You'll blaze through it like you're on fire and come out the other side wishing all writers could achieve this level of honesty and brilliance.
September 3, 2011
Can I give this book 100 stars???!!!! I loved this book! I didn't just like it. I loved it. I honestly loved this book! I wish I would have had the time to sit down and read this in one session, but life kind of got in the way and it took me forever to finish this book. You know what, I'm kind of glad I didn't finish it in one sitting. Reading it a few pages at a time made me feel like I got a chance to really get to know Craig. Then again, there were many times I had to remind myself that no, I do not know him. But damn, this guy could have been one of my friends. And my god, could he and I think anymore alike? There were places in this book that I highlighted entire chapters. There were other times I had to contemplate if this guy had over heard me say some of the things he said. No, couldn't be, he is a few years older than I am. This book had me laughing at times, crying at times and more than once laughing and crying at the same time. I had to remind myself that I had never visited let alone lived in any of the places he lived in. But damn how can that be? I've been to that bar, I knew that girl, and I dated that guy! And man oh man, I think like that---and I'm shocked when I find out that most "normal" people do not think like that. This was one of those crazy books written about your past by someone you have never met, but swear by all that is holy that you know very, very well. And I never even worked in the clubs. My long haired flawed knight rescued me before I got the chance. Every other young woman I knew wasn't that lucky. I was just smart enough to understand as I watched their lives that the phrase, "there but for the grace of god go I"....even when I was twisted enough to envy them.
Great book Craig! I'm very pleased I got the chance to read it. I feel kind of bad that I won this book though. Now I feel like I need to buy a copy or a few copies or a copy for every person I ever knew that worked one of those clubs or grew up in one of those situations.
Keep writing. Please keep writing. It's very rare that I read a book written by someone I consider "normal." I know you have more stories and man I'd love to read them.
Great book Craig! I'm very pleased I got the chance to read it. I feel kind of bad that I won this book though. Now I feel like I need to buy a copy or a few copies or a copy for every person I ever knew that worked one of those clubs or grew up in one of those situations.
Keep writing. Please keep writing. It's very rare that I read a book written by someone I consider "normal." I know you have more stories and man I'd love to read them.
February 22, 2012
This was a Goodreads win. Thank you.
Sex and economics rule the world, you don't get one without the other! This story tells of a young man coming of age. No soccer mum story here, no Nannies and Aunties coming to tea on Sundays. No baseball practices or normal family. Craig Machen writes of growing up in a dysfunctional family with a sex crazed mother and a gay father. He is also adopted, and neither of his adopted parents ever grew up!
Craig Machen tells his story of growing up in strip clubs, sex, drugs, abortions and love. He never gives up on love, always looking for something he craved but never received from his immediate family. Except, maybe from his gran. Yet, he appears to be full of love. Especially where animals and his little sister is concerned. He has the ability to love big time.
I found the story very sad, it is amazing that Mr. Machen actually makes it to grow up past the age of 21 and to actually have a family of his own and a career. Kudo's.
Probably would have given you five stars Mr. Machen, but gasp, on page 197 your write, "At some point, I think you just have to be honest with yourself about your own level of freakishness. I mean, do you want to watch Andy Griffith or The Last Picture Show? Do you want to hear Pat Boone or Little Richard"?
OMG, I am a Boone fan! I fell in love with Pat when I was eleven. I nearly stopped reading!! I mean, I have all his records still! I have Little Richard too though, and confession, I love Richard Simmons also. So yes, we are worlds apart!
Great job of writing, easy to read, easy to understand, and leaves the reader wondering. So, o.k. let's hear the rest, what is the next chapter? Inquiring minds want to know!
Book has already been passed on to another inquiring mind!
Sex and economics rule the world, you don't get one without the other! This story tells of a young man coming of age. No soccer mum story here, no Nannies and Aunties coming to tea on Sundays. No baseball practices or normal family. Craig Machen writes of growing up in a dysfunctional family with a sex crazed mother and a gay father. He is also adopted, and neither of his adopted parents ever grew up!
Craig Machen tells his story of growing up in strip clubs, sex, drugs, abortions and love. He never gives up on love, always looking for something he craved but never received from his immediate family. Except, maybe from his gran. Yet, he appears to be full of love. Especially where animals and his little sister is concerned. He has the ability to love big time.
I found the story very sad, it is amazing that Mr. Machen actually makes it to grow up past the age of 21 and to actually have a family of his own and a career. Kudo's.
Probably would have given you five stars Mr. Machen, but gasp, on page 197 your write, "At some point, I think you just have to be honest with yourself about your own level of freakishness. I mean, do you want to watch Andy Griffith or The Last Picture Show? Do you want to hear Pat Boone or Little Richard"?
OMG, I am a Boone fan! I fell in love with Pat when I was eleven. I nearly stopped reading!! I mean, I have all his records still! I have Little Richard too though, and confession, I love Richard Simmons also. So yes, we are worlds apart!
Great job of writing, easy to read, easy to understand, and leaves the reader wondering. So, o.k. let's hear the rest, what is the next chapter? Inquiring minds want to know!
Book has already been passed on to another inquiring mind!
February 10, 2012
originally appeared on:Bookshelf Confessions
*I won a free copy of this e-book in a LibraryThing Member Giveaway*
i find this story related to the present situations ordinary people could really face today. instead of giving us the sorrows of a girl, we have garnered the story of a boy who turns out later to be a man.
there are alot of ramblings which sometimes i skip :), but then, i guess it just adds to the spice of the story and it explains or gives us the insight of the protagonist. it's a simple tale, with a simple character but with an extraordinary situations that would make each of us realize how lucky we are at times not to be in the character's shoes.
the story falls smoothly , and it inspires, touches the heart of those who read it.
totally worth reading.
Craig is 16 when he returns from a drug-fueled visit with his dad in Miami to find his mom leaving town with her 23 year-old boyfriend. In the same moment, his dreams of settling down with his pregnant girlfriend are dashed when she is moved off to Texas by her parents. Left alone in small town Oklahoma, he embarks on a deranged, cross-country quest for a family of his own.
STILL LIFE WITH BRASS POLE is Craig Machen’s funny, debauched and heartfelt memoir about young love and coming of age in the titillation business. And how a roaring White Knight Complex, an eccentric comedy club owner, and a trio of unpredictable striptease artists conspire to help him achieve his aims.
*I won a free copy of this e-book in a LibraryThing Member Giveaway*
i find this story related to the present situations ordinary people could really face today. instead of giving us the sorrows of a girl, we have garnered the story of a boy who turns out later to be a man.
there are alot of ramblings which sometimes i skip :), but then, i guess it just adds to the spice of the story and it explains or gives us the insight of the protagonist. it's a simple tale, with a simple character but with an extraordinary situations that would make each of us realize how lucky we are at times not to be in the character's shoes.
the story falls smoothly , and it inspires, touches the heart of those who read it.
totally worth reading.
Craig is 16 when he returns from a drug-fueled visit with his dad in Miami to find his mom leaving town with her 23 year-old boyfriend. In the same moment, his dreams of settling down with his pregnant girlfriend are dashed when she is moved off to Texas by her parents. Left alone in small town Oklahoma, he embarks on a deranged, cross-country quest for a family of his own.
STILL LIFE WITH BRASS POLE is Craig Machen’s funny, debauched and heartfelt memoir about young love and coming of age in the titillation business. And how a roaring White Knight Complex, an eccentric comedy club owner, and a trio of unpredictable striptease artists conspire to help him achieve his aims.
July 30, 2011
I don't know what to make of this memoir. It was written in a light and engaging manner, but at the same time, Mr. Machen was brutally honest in recounting the events of his youth, events that would have broken a lesser man. I found his natural reactions to these events alternately heartbreaking, amusing, disturbing, uplifting and at times, even bordering on offensive (sorry, but I really am a prude at heart). That one man can be dealt such a lousy hand in life and go on to make something of himself, and still look back and be able to tell his story in such an amusing way is a testament to what an amazing individual he must be.
I do have to admit, when I first saw this book offered on First Reads, I thought it was a work of fiction. When I did not win a copy, I downloaded the Kindle version and discovered my error. I probably would have enjoyed it much more if it had been fiction. It saddens me to think there are parents who would treat kids like that, especially now that I have teens of my own.
That being said, I would love to see this author write a novel in this same style. He's a bit of a creative soul, as per his bio he now makes an apparently successful living as a screenwriter. He certainly wouldn't be the first to perform double duty as a screenwriter and novelist. How about it, Mr. Machen? Do you think you're up to the challenge of writing a novel?
I do have to admit, when I first saw this book offered on First Reads, I thought it was a work of fiction. When I did not win a copy, I downloaded the Kindle version and discovered my error. I probably would have enjoyed it much more if it had been fiction. It saddens me to think there are parents who would treat kids like that, especially now that I have teens of my own.
That being said, I would love to see this author write a novel in this same style. He's a bit of a creative soul, as per his bio he now makes an apparently successful living as a screenwriter. He certainly wouldn't be the first to perform double duty as a screenwriter and novelist. How about it, Mr. Machen? Do you think you're up to the challenge of writing a novel?
September 3, 2012
Still Life With Brass Pole is more than just a story worth your focus, energy and open heart. More than a memoir worth reading and learning from. This is a book that will reward you handsomely for opening your senses to the plenitude of human feelings the author digs through. The benefits from reading this leap of literary faith are uncountable. This writer will stir your pot of raw feelings throughout the entire time in which this book holds you dazzled. It's inevitable that you'll feel connected to this author and you'll be granted a chance at experiencing his range of emotions vicariously as he moves you through the pages of his book swiftly without reservation or inhibition. Craig strikes me as being a dear man with a remarkable awareness and a rare but beautiful sensitivity. In reading this biography it's easy to develop a penchant for his unconventional style. Strikingly open, he seems to be a daringly honest writer. If this entire account were deemed pure fiction Craig would still compel you to engage this material with the same passion that he has written with. Definitely Give This Book A Shot!
May 23, 2011
The reader will love the writing style of the author, it truly feels like he is telling the reader about events in his life. The reader will literally bite his/her nails in anticipation...and then later in anguish...and smile at the author's personality. The reader will be immediately drawn into the novel. The author describes his adoptive parents and how one abuses him, then takes the reader on a wilder ride through his time of sex, drugs, and steroids. His forays into strip clubs leads to him being hired as a bouncer. Arnold Schwarzenegger is his main focus in regards to body-building, something the author is unabashedly single-minded about. He shares how he seems to be a "sex-fiend" at times, telling the reader without any qualms. Machen is a very likable character; funny, truthful, and unashamed. He reveals his desire to "walk in the light", get married and have children, and improve himself-all admirable desires. The reader will be enamored of Machen, the pages will fly quickly. This novel is great for adults and even young adults.
September 8, 2011
Though I enjoy memoirs, I often find it difficult to read about topics like drug addiction and sexual escapades. So, Still Life With Brass Pole took me a bit outside of my usual comfort zone, but it’s not an excursion I regret making in any way.
Machen writes candidly, seeming to hold nothing back. His tone soon put me at ease and won my trust. As a character, Machen is the likable sort you hope will succeed, despite his misguided ways. As a narrator, he is the kind of voice you warm up to quickly and follow willingly.
If you have issues with drugs, alcohol, addiction, sex, abuse, and/or strong language in books, I would caution you that Machen’s memoir contains all of those. However, I can also say that I found it rather more accessible than I had expected, and I think there are plenty of readers out there who would enjoy Still Life With Brass Pole very much.
My full review is posted on Erin Reads.
Machen writes candidly, seeming to hold nothing back. His tone soon put me at ease and won my trust. As a character, Machen is the likable sort you hope will succeed, despite his misguided ways. As a narrator, he is the kind of voice you warm up to quickly and follow willingly.
If you have issues with drugs, alcohol, addiction, sex, abuse, and/or strong language in books, I would caution you that Machen’s memoir contains all of those. However, I can also say that I found it rather more accessible than I had expected, and I think there are plenty of readers out there who would enjoy Still Life With Brass Pole very much.
My full review is posted on Erin Reads.
December 2, 2012
If I'm honest, I got this book not really reading the whole cover and thought it was going to be a comedic book about a stripper. I had just finished a rather intense book and was looking for something light. When I started reading I was instantaneously addicted. I did however go back and look at the cover and read it completely and read the synopsis. Although it is not what I initially wanted I am SO happy that IT got it. To read his journey through life was so heart tearing. I kept thinking to myself, how horrible this poor guy's life was and amazed at how nonchalant he can talk about it. To see him struggle over and over with the same challenges is heartbreaking, but ti see that ultimately he conquered all is breath taking and gives hope. I often say it is hard to believe that you need a license to fish but not to raise children and that us so true with this story. It is. Miracle that he was able to triumph over everything his 'family' did to him. I am so sorry for what he went through but thrilled he saw the light at the end of the tunnel. Thanks for sharing!
August 2, 2011
Craig Machen's memoir is without a doubt one of the best I have ever read, because of its sincerity. You never get this ''too good to be true'' feeling while reading Still Life with Brass Pole because this book is brutally honest and you can sense that even if the author isn't proud of many things he has done in his life, at least he admits it and doesn't try to embellish his past.
I think that what was the most fascinating about that memoir for me was that Craig Machen's life was so totally at the opposite of mine. He experienced so many thing I never have, and reading about it makes me feel like I was right to be a good girl. This book also touched me deeply because all the way through the book, you can sense that emotional and romantic young man as he is and see that he wants a good life, and a family of his own. He wants to be better than his own parents, be a good grown up, a good dad.
I think that what was the most fascinating about that memoir for me was that Craig Machen's life was so totally at the opposite of mine. He experienced so many thing I never have, and reading about it makes me feel like I was right to be a good girl. This book also touched me deeply because all the way through the book, you can sense that emotional and romantic young man as he is and see that he wants a good life, and a family of his own. He wants to be better than his own parents, be a good grown up, a good dad.
January 19, 2013
Memoir? I have no idea what made me get this book. I usually read historical romances or some other sort of love story fiction. Memoirs are complete off my radar. This memoir so like that of any fictional hero or anti-hero’s story in the typical romance novel. There is even a happy ending.
The book is witty and unapologetically irreverent, yet I found myself completely captivated. I had to keep reminding myself that this is a memoir. I wouldn’t wish that real life on anyone, but then most of us wouldn’t wish our growing up on another person. The author does a terrific job of telling what, is essentially a heart breaking story, in a funny, sniggering, chuckling, and outright laughing fashion. He was even able to get me to identify with his emotions, even though I have never personally experienced anything like his life. That is a lot to get from one person’s story.
The book is witty and unapologetically irreverent, yet I found myself completely captivated. I had to keep reminding myself that this is a memoir. I wouldn’t wish that real life on anyone, but then most of us wouldn’t wish our growing up on another person. The author does a terrific job of telling what, is essentially a heart breaking story, in a funny, sniggering, chuckling, and outright laughing fashion. He was even able to get me to identify with his emotions, even though I have never personally experienced anything like his life. That is a lot to get from one person’s story.
July 20, 2011
One of the best self-published memoirs you'll read, Machen takes us through the debauchery of his teens and early 20s with zest and down-to-earth wit. By the sound of his childhood, he has plenty to bitch about, but like great memoirist Frank McCourt he doesn't waste our time with woe is me declarations. Instead, he takes a headlong into the underbelly of the strip club, steroid and coke-snorting culture of the 80s and 90s, reveling in it all while yearning for the normal family life he clearly doesn't believe he deserves. A tale that takes you down there and raises you out at the end. Highly recommended.
July 11, 2011
CRAIG MACHEN'S "STILL LIFE WITH BRASS POLE" (REVIEW)
This book commemorates a 16 year old boy's summer with his father, full of drugs and exotic living to find his mother leaving town. His girlfriend is pregnant and through the story he is mulling over how he's hoping she never finds out about his sordid visit after deciding to settled down with her only to find out she's moved to Texas. He decides to pack up his losses and go on a search for his own idea of family.
This is a coming of age story, with undertones of humor. Thoroughly enjoyable.
-Kitty Bullard / Great Minds Think Aloud Book Club
This book commemorates a 16 year old boy's summer with his father, full of drugs and exotic living to find his mother leaving town. His girlfriend is pregnant and through the story he is mulling over how he's hoping she never finds out about his sordid visit after deciding to settled down with her only to find out she's moved to Texas. He decides to pack up his losses and go on a search for his own idea of family.
This is a coming of age story, with undertones of humor. Thoroughly enjoyable.
-Kitty Bullard / Great Minds Think Aloud Book Club
July 2, 2011
Craig Machen's twisted memoir of coming to age on a twisted path that lead him into a variety of adult situations that an ordinary young man, would be envious of but not a life that they would want to live day in and day out themselves. The hard knock life taught Craig a lot about human nature and himself while he sought his dream of being a good man and a good father to a child who would idolize him. I found this human tale touching to read. Thank you Library Early Reviewers for sharing this author with me.
September 17, 2011
This is a decent coming of age memoir. It’s filled with alcohol, drugs, dysfunctional relationships and lots of sex. The author has a self deprecating sense of humor that works well and makes the book fun to read. The story moves along at a good pace for the first half of the book but then slows way down during a couple of on-again, off-again relationships that seem to go on for a long time. I'm sure some people will enjoy the book and I did like his writing style and sense of humor but I can’t give it more than three stars.
August 7, 2012
How, exactly, does one write a review of a memoir?
I've never figured it out. I will say, however, that as a father of two boys, the Epiologue rang so true that I had a dad tear going.
Life is what we make of it. Sometimes we make the right choices, sometimes we make the wrong ones. Sometimes we want to make the right ones and come up short.
I think the author did a pretty good job documenting these choices, in a self-effacing, light-hearted style. I think this is a good book.
Yea, that's a crappy review. But how does one review a life written to paper?
I've never figured it out. I will say, however, that as a father of two boys, the Epiologue rang so true that I had a dad tear going.
Life is what we make of it. Sometimes we make the right choices, sometimes we make the wrong ones. Sometimes we want to make the right ones and come up short.
I think the author did a pretty good job documenting these choices, in a self-effacing, light-hearted style. I think this is a good book.
Yea, that's a crappy review. But how does one review a life written to paper?
August 24, 2012
More moving and touching than I expected. I laughed out loud and my heart invariably found itself going out to the author and his family. Contrary to what many may believe (or used to hold as a standard in the 50's), I think Craig's story might be a little bit more so-called "all-American" than one might think. Kudos to Machen for being so sincere and un-self-conscious about reliving his very interesting teenage years.
This is a wild ride with lots of heart and a conscience. Also, I loooove the title.
This is a wild ride with lots of heart and a conscience. Also, I loooove the title.
November 28, 2012
How many times have you read a book review that says, "funny and insightful"? Probably so many times that these words are nothing more than cliche. Rather than go to the thesaurus for more original sounding words, just take me seriously when I say that this book was funny and insightful- and sad, and interesting, and pathetic. I've never been the kind of reader who enjoys someone else's memoirs, but this is a five star exception.
September 12, 2016
Good book!!
I wasn't sure what to expect with this book and nearly stopped in the beginning because it had such a dramatic start. I thought, "oh, this is gonna be cheesy. Like any 15 year old has ever gotten into a strip club". This book began to get good and then only got better. What an eye opener. It really helped give an understanding to the thought process of sex addicts. Great book! I kept wanting more!!
I wasn't sure what to expect with this book and nearly stopped in the beginning because it had such a dramatic start. I thought, "oh, this is gonna be cheesy. Like any 15 year old has ever gotten into a strip club". This book began to get good and then only got better. What an eye opener. It really helped give an understanding to the thought process of sex addicts. Great book! I kept wanting more!!
June 25, 2011
I won this book from first reads. I really enjoyed it. It was a nice quick read and was really quite interesting. I got a look into a totally different type of lifestyle that I normally wouldnt even care to hear about.
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