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Everything I Know About Love I Learned from Romance Novels
Take a dashing hero with a heart of gold and a mullet of awesome. Add a heroine with a bustle and the will to kick major butt. Then include enough contrivances to keep them fighting while getting them alone and possibly without key pieces of clothing, and what do you have? A romance novel. What else? Enough lessons about life, love, and everything in between to help you with your own happily-ever-after.
Lessons like...
- Romance means believing you are worthy of a happy ending
- Learning to tell the prince from the frog
- Real-life romance is still alive and kicking
- No matter how bad it is, at least you haven't been kidnapped by a Scottish duke (probably)
Lessons like...
- Romance means believing you are worthy of a happy ending
- Learning to tell the prince from the frog
- Real-life romance is still alive and kicking
- No matter how bad it is, at least you haven't been kidnapped by a Scottish duke (probably)
222 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2011
30 people are currently reading
1010 people want to read
About the author
Sarah Wendell
4 books741 followersSarah Wendell is a transplanted Pittsburgher currently living in New York metropolitan area. By day she's mild mannered and heavily caffeinated. By evening she dons her cranky costume, consumes yet more caffeine, and becomes Smart Bitch Sarah of
Smart Bitches, Trashy Books. The site specializes in reviewing romance novels, examining the history and future of the genre, and bemoaning the enormous prevalence of bodacious pectorals adorning male cover models. Sarah has appeared in The New York Times, The New York Post, the Philadephia Inquirer, and on The Today Show.
"
Smart Bitches, Trashy Books. The site specializes in reviewing romance novels, examining the history and future of the genre, and bemoaning the enormous prevalence of bodacious pectorals adorning male cover models. Sarah has appeared in The New York Times, The New York Post, the Philadephia Inquirer, and on The Today Show.
"
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 145 reviews
September 9, 2011
I picked up my first romance novel at the age of 12, and just like that I was hooked. By the time I was in high school, I read romance almost exclusively and, during a productive week, could read (or re-read) 5-7 books. And yet, I was made to feel ashamed. My guy friends would grab them from my hands and flip through them until they found a sex scene and attempt to read it out loud. I get it. They were 16 and it was sex and boys pick on you to show their affection at that age. Yet, it still hurt, and I still felt like I needed to hide my reading habits. Or at least my book covers. And as I’ve grown, I’ve learned a thing or two about not being ashamed of my books, but romance is still tragically not recognized by many as something smart women read.
When I was reading Everything I Know About Love I Learned from Romance Novels (heretofore known as EIKAL) by Sarah Wendell, goddess of Smart Bitches, Trashy Books, I sent a friend a text message that said “this book is validating my entire existence.” And then I tweeted the same sentiment to both Sarah and every one of my Twitter followers. This is it, I thought, this is the information and explanation I needed for those teenage douchecanoes all those years ago. She knows all the ways that being a romance fiend has made me a better person, a better friend, and quite a catch, frankly. Yes, it was probably dramatic of me, but there was a great deal of truth to it. Wendell is offering something fantastic to romance readers in EIKAL.
In her previous book, Beyond Heaving Bosoms: The Smart Bitches Guide to Romance Novels, Wendell & her co-author Candy Tan offered a kind of Romance Novel 101. They answered the questions of ‘What exactly is a romance novel, how long have they been around, and what are the themes and archetypes embodied in them?’ In EIKAL, Wendell tackles something akin to Romance Novel 201, taking a look at how romance readers are affected by the romances they read.
Throwing out the idea, as she did in Beyond Heaving Bosoms, that romances are meaningless bits of fluff, Wendell clearly and with great humor gives voice to all the things romance readers have long known about their beloved genre but may not have been able to articulate: these books teach us something. They give us safe spaces to explore what we want out of real life relationships. They help us learn communication and problem solving skills. They teach us a thing or two about good sex. And they do it while entertaining our pants off.
If you’ve read any of Wendell’s work for Smart Bitches, Trashy Books, you’ll recognize her writing voice in this book. She’s quite often funny, delightfully direct, and always insightful. Quotes from popular romances and from authors themselves serve as Wendell’s source material, and I dare you to read this book without making a shopping list. In fact, Wendell includes one at the end, because she’s got our backs like that.
If you’re a long-time lover of romance or even a recent convert, you’ll like this book. Like me, you’ll thrill when Wendell quotes an author or book you like or mentions a character that you’ve been in love with for years. If you’re one of those people who thinks romances are trashy and useless: you’re wrong, you should let me smack you about the head, and you should read this book to find out why you‘re a wrong meany-head. My only complaint? This book should come in a big box with all the books Wendell has on the shopping list! I’d buy it.
When I was reading Everything I Know About Love I Learned from Romance Novels (heretofore known as EIKAL) by Sarah Wendell, goddess of Smart Bitches, Trashy Books, I sent a friend a text message that said “this book is validating my entire existence.” And then I tweeted the same sentiment to both Sarah and every one of my Twitter followers. This is it, I thought, this is the information and explanation I needed for those teenage douchecanoes all those years ago. She knows all the ways that being a romance fiend has made me a better person, a better friend, and quite a catch, frankly. Yes, it was probably dramatic of me, but there was a great deal of truth to it. Wendell is offering something fantastic to romance readers in EIKAL.
In her previous book, Beyond Heaving Bosoms: The Smart Bitches Guide to Romance Novels, Wendell & her co-author Candy Tan offered a kind of Romance Novel 101. They answered the questions of ‘What exactly is a romance novel, how long have they been around, and what are the themes and archetypes embodied in them?’ In EIKAL, Wendell tackles something akin to Romance Novel 201, taking a look at how romance readers are affected by the romances they read.
Throwing out the idea, as she did in Beyond Heaving Bosoms, that romances are meaningless bits of fluff, Wendell clearly and with great humor gives voice to all the things romance readers have long known about their beloved genre but may not have been able to articulate: these books teach us something. They give us safe spaces to explore what we want out of real life relationships. They help us learn communication and problem solving skills. They teach us a thing or two about good sex. And they do it while entertaining our pants off.
If you’ve read any of Wendell’s work for Smart Bitches, Trashy Books, you’ll recognize her writing voice in this book. She’s quite often funny, delightfully direct, and always insightful. Quotes from popular romances and from authors themselves serve as Wendell’s source material, and I dare you to read this book without making a shopping list. In fact, Wendell includes one at the end, because she’s got our backs like that.
If you’re a long-time lover of romance or even a recent convert, you’ll like this book. Like me, you’ll thrill when Wendell quotes an author or book you like or mentions a character that you’ve been in love with for years. If you’re one of those people who thinks romances are trashy and useless: you’re wrong, you should let me smack you about the head, and you should read this book to find out why you‘re a wrong meany-head. My only complaint? This book should come in a big box with all the books Wendell has on the shopping list! I’d buy it.
January 9, 2012
3+ stars. A good, quick, humorous read, but only a few things that will remain memorable.
The book covers a variety of different romance novel- and love-related themes, to varying degrees of success. For example, I only skim-read through the chapter on heroes, titled "We Know More Than A Few Good Men." Why? Well, I know what I like in heroes, and I don't necessarily need analysis on why or what others like. I found that this section just didn't hold my interest, to be honest. Also, there are a lot of book quotes in that section, so I was trying to avoid unintentional spoilers. On the other hand, the chapter on sex was actually quite insightful and thoughtful for reasons that are not pervy, surprisingly. I found it very interesting to see how romance novel sex has influenced women's perspectives on it, whether it be their becoming comfortable with sexuality while not having anyone with whom to discuss it, their openness to exploring kinks, or just as a resource for ideas beyond Tab-A-Goes-Into-Slot-B information.
As a general note, I really liked the writer's snarky, humorous, conversational tone. It's too bad that, with at least 50% of the book (probably more like 60-70%?) comprised of extensive quotes from a multitude of authors and readers, we don't get to hear too much of that tone.
A few things that really resonated with me:
1. "Just about every romance reader I've ever spoken to can recall the first romance she read." So true. Case in point, for me: The Scandalous Wager.
2. The 2009 Boston Globe article by Robin Schoenthaler that is quoted in the heroes chapter, which the author introduces by saying "the ideal man is not the one with the biggest bank account or the extreme sports habit, but is the man who will hold your purse in the cancer clinic." I looked up the article in full, and you can find it here.
3. The personal recovery writing piece that is included in full from an anonymous survivor of childhood sexual abuse, found in the section "We Know That Happily-Ever-After Takes Work." A brutal and honest account of how books were this person's escape, the vivid writing made me cry. Specifically, this part:
The book covers a variety of different romance novel- and love-related themes, to varying degrees of success. For example, I only skim-read through the chapter on heroes, titled "We Know More Than A Few Good Men." Why? Well, I know what I like in heroes, and I don't necessarily need analysis on why or what others like. I found that this section just didn't hold my interest, to be honest. Also, there are a lot of book quotes in that section, so I was trying to avoid unintentional spoilers. On the other hand, the chapter on sex was actually quite insightful and thoughtful for reasons that are not pervy, surprisingly. I found it very interesting to see how romance novel sex has influenced women's perspectives on it, whether it be their becoming comfortable with sexuality while not having anyone with whom to discuss it, their openness to exploring kinks, or just as a resource for ideas beyond Tab-A-Goes-Into-Slot-B information.
As a general note, I really liked the writer's snarky, humorous, conversational tone. It's too bad that, with at least 50% of the book (probably more like 60-70%?) comprised of extensive quotes from a multitude of authors and readers, we don't get to hear too much of that tone.
A few things that really resonated with me:
1. "Just about every romance reader I've ever spoken to can recall the first romance she read." So true. Case in point, for me: The Scandalous Wager.
2. The 2009 Boston Globe article by Robin Schoenthaler that is quoted in the heroes chapter, which the author introduces by saying "the ideal man is not the one with the biggest bank account or the extreme sports habit, but is the man who will hold your purse in the cancer clinic." I looked up the article in full, and you can find it here.
3. The personal recovery writing piece that is included in full from an anonymous survivor of childhood sexual abuse, found in the section "We Know That Happily-Ever-After Takes Work." A brutal and honest account of how books were this person's escape, the vivid writing made me cry. Specifically, this part:
January 8, 2015
Everything I Know about Love I Learned from Romance Novels has left me rather conflicted. A week ago, I would not have believed anyone who told me that I would own and read this book, let alone that I would have bought it full price. That was before I met Sarah Wendell and heard her on a panel about love in literature.
I loved both Sarah's personality and her passion for the subject of romance novels and what they can teach. These things came through incredibly clearly both when she spoke and in the book. I particularly like the chapter "We Know Good Sex" in which the ways romance novels and erotica can help women become more comfortable with or grow into their sexuality. Given the way our culture views women and sex, this is a need that cannot possibly be overemphasized. I also liked the many examples of people who feel they have avoided relationship mistakes because of the things they learned from the genre.
The things that bothered me about the book were the focus on the exceptionalism of romance readers and the fact that it paints an extremely rosy picture. I would be very interested in seeing how many of the statistics listed regarding the intelligence, education, relationship satisfaction, etc. of romance readers compare to those about readers in general. It is understandable, that she wants to lay to rest the dreadful stereotype of what women who read romances are like, but it feels like it goes way overboard in that sense. There are some lessons mentioned that I did learn through romance novels, but most of them are things I learned through reading in general or through watching other people. There were some painful lessons learned through mistakes as well. Basically, a lot of the book felt rather one-sided. In spite of this, I do recommend the book to anyone who enjoys romance novels, or anyone with an interest in sex and relationships in our culture.
I loved both Sarah's personality and her passion for the subject of romance novels and what they can teach. These things came through incredibly clearly both when she spoke and in the book. I particularly like the chapter "We Know Good Sex" in which the ways romance novels and erotica can help women become more comfortable with or grow into their sexuality. Given the way our culture views women and sex, this is a need that cannot possibly be overemphasized. I also liked the many examples of people who feel they have avoided relationship mistakes because of the things they learned from the genre.
The things that bothered me about the book were the focus on the exceptionalism of romance readers and the fact that it paints an extremely rosy picture. I would be very interested in seeing how many of the statistics listed regarding the intelligence, education, relationship satisfaction, etc. of romance readers compare to those about readers in general. It is understandable, that she wants to lay to rest the dreadful stereotype of what women who read romances are like, but it feels like it goes way overboard in that sense. There are some lessons mentioned that I did learn through romance novels, but most of them are things I learned through reading in general or through watching other people. There were some painful lessons learned through mistakes as well. Basically, a lot of the book felt rather one-sided. In spite of this, I do recommend the book to anyone who enjoys romance novels, or anyone with an interest in sex and relationships in our culture.
October 20, 2011
Don't you love it when a book reinforces what you already believe? Over and over during this book, I found myself saying "That's what I always tell people!" and "See, I knew what I was talking about!" Many of you may know Sarah Wendell from her blog Smart Bitches, Trashy Books, and her new book is a must read for romance novel addicts like me.
This book is all about all of the positive things about romance novels, including contemporaries, paranormals, and my romance of choice-historicals. There are two main points that really stand out in my head that are reasons why I love the genre, too. First, the books focus on women, women are important, and women are worth it. This is a huge reason why I read romances. The other main point I agree with is that romances are overall positive and hopeful. Even when there are tough issues in the book, the main message about hope and the books stay positive.
It's also interesting to me that the romances that I have really just not enjoyed have broken some of the 'rules' that are talked about in the book. One example that the author gave was that we don't want to read about how fat the main character thinks she is. Another deal breaker in romances is when the heroine is repeatedly beaten down in her self esteem-yes even by the 'hero'. She also makes the point that sexual fidelity is a main component of romances. If the hero cheats on the heroine, you can count me out for the rest of the story.
If you know someone who doesn't 'get' why we read romances, maybe they could page through this book and see all of the real and positive aspects about the genre.
Let's celebrate romance novels! And in doing so, we celebrate women, love and hope.
ARC sent by publisher in exchange for honest review
reviewed for http://inthehammockblog.blogspot.com
This book is all about all of the positive things about romance novels, including contemporaries, paranormals, and my romance of choice-historicals. There are two main points that really stand out in my head that are reasons why I love the genre, too. First, the books focus on women, women are important, and women are worth it. This is a huge reason why I read romances. The other main point I agree with is that romances are overall positive and hopeful. Even when there are tough issues in the book, the main message about hope and the books stay positive.
It's also interesting to me that the romances that I have really just not enjoyed have broken some of the 'rules' that are talked about in the book. One example that the author gave was that we don't want to read about how fat the main character thinks she is. Another deal breaker in romances is when the heroine is repeatedly beaten down in her self esteem-yes even by the 'hero'. She also makes the point that sexual fidelity is a main component of romances. If the hero cheats on the heroine, you can count me out for the rest of the story.
If you know someone who doesn't 'get' why we read romances, maybe they could page through this book and see all of the real and positive aspects about the genre.
Let's celebrate romance novels! And in doing so, we celebrate women, love and hope.
ARC sent by publisher in exchange for honest review
reviewed for http://inthehammockblog.blogspot.com
February 12, 2022
I love reading the newer modern day romances. My favorite books though, are called the gothic romances written in the 60's and 70's but they really are not romances like the new romances. More of a suspense novel than a romance even though romance is danced around.
This book speaks of what you might learn from reading romances. I think everyone of all sexes should read some modern day romances. Much to learn about what to expect from your partner, but more importantly, how to act yourself in your relationship. This book helped me see the error in my ways. I am 65 now and have been married to the same woman almost 39 years. I could have been a way better husband if I had read this book before I was married.
This book speaks of what you might learn from reading romances. I think everyone of all sexes should read some modern day romances. Much to learn about what to expect from your partner, but more importantly, how to act yourself in your relationship. This book helped me see the error in my ways. I am 65 now and have been married to the same woman almost 39 years. I could have been a way better husband if I had read this book before I was married.
September 8, 2014
3.75!
It felt like a lot of circuitous comments about the genre, basically? Like, too much of each of the chapters was simply looping back and stating the same idea in slightly different language?
But I do love the fact that YES, the romance genre is IMPORTANT and opens up discussion about what women want / desire / dnw / etc, and explores what a relationship can mean and how a HEA can exist in this moment instead of some nebulous future moment.
And I recognized so many of the recs! I FEEL SO ACCOMPLISHED RIGHT NOW OMFG. (I wanted more recs.)
It felt like a lot of circuitous comments about the genre, basically? Like, too much of each of the chapters was simply looping back and stating the same idea in slightly different language?
But I do love the fact that YES, the romance genre is IMPORTANT and opens up discussion about what women want / desire / dnw / etc, and explores what a relationship can mean and how a HEA can exist in this moment instead of some nebulous future moment.
And I recognized so many of the recs! I FEEL SO ACCOMPLISHED RIGHT NOW OMFG. (I wanted more recs.)
September 9, 2011
I didn't expect this book to make me tear up, but it did. I didn't expect it to fill me with a warm, fuzzy type of comfort, but it did. I did expect it to entertain and delight me, and it did that. I should've expected the first two things, too, after all, reading can be an intensely personal experience and this is a book that collects some very candid, personal experiences.
I also didn't expect it to validate my habit of skipping ahead to the end, but it also did that, for which my undying devotion to author Sarah Wendell got reinforced with a "hell, yeah!" and a "damn, right!"
I also didn't expect it to validate my habit of skipping ahead to the end, but it also did that, for which my undying devotion to author Sarah Wendell got reinforced with a "hell, yeah!" and a "damn, right!"
July 29, 2017
Rating: 3.5 STARS
(Review Not on Blog)
(I am working on a writing project on dating, love, romance, self confidence, creativity and self love. Currently, I am reading and researching the topics. The books I am reading for this I will also be reviewing, but may not discuss the project in the review.)
Sarah Wendell is one of the bloggers behind the Smart Bitches, Trashy Books - all of the romance, none of the bullshit blog. I like many of the points that Wendell makes in that romance novels is actually empowering to women and their relationships. It doesn't really cause women to have high expectations but rather healthy confidence in themselves and what they deserve. I like Wendell's humour as much as her passion behind reading and romance novels. I would recommend this book to fellow romance readers but more so to those that scoff over them. I was expecting a bit more to the book, rather than it being a novelty style. I found it hard to read all in one setting so read parts at a time.
(Review Not on Blog)
(I am working on a writing project on dating, love, romance, self confidence, creativity and self love. Currently, I am reading and researching the topics. The books I am reading for this I will also be reviewing, but may not discuss the project in the review.)
Sarah Wendell is one of the bloggers behind the Smart Bitches, Trashy Books - all of the romance, none of the bullshit blog. I like many of the points that Wendell makes in that romance novels is actually empowering to women and their relationships. It doesn't really cause women to have high expectations but rather healthy confidence in themselves and what they deserve. I like Wendell's humour as much as her passion behind reading and romance novels. I would recommend this book to fellow romance readers but more so to those that scoff over them. I was expecting a bit more to the book, rather than it being a novelty style. I found it hard to read all in one setting so read parts at a time.
May 26, 2018
While this was enjoyable and fun to read, it didn't necessarily tell me anything I didn't already know. I think this book is perfect for the people (men and women) who disdain romance and by default, the people who write and read it. About a year ago, I was at the post office mailing out several books for swap. The postal worker checking me out, was interested in what I was sending out. We talked very briefly about books and when I told her I primarily read romance (of all genres), I got an "Oh." This was an exciting conversation, that quickly turned awkward. I couldn't get of there fast enough.
March 2, 2013
Relationship advice and book recommendations in one funny package-- who can go wrong with this? If you're a reader of romance and DON'T yet know who Sarah Wendell is, shame on you. No, really-- she's the person behind the "Smart Bitches, Trashy Books" romance blog, and she's here to take the "guilty" out of romances as a "guilty pleasure."
I was a latecomer to the romance genre. In my teen and college years, I didn't have a lot of respect for the "trashy novels" my female relatives gobbled up so quickly (and, given that this was in the 80s and 90s, a good deal of it probably WAS trash). I'd tried a few, and they were all formulaic cardboard, about as romantic as a little girl picking up her Ken and Barbie dolls and smooshing their faces together. The so-called heroes treated their women like possessions and seemed to have no respect for them-- and I didn't either. (Ah yes, the age of the classic alphole romance....) I wasn't against romance as an idea, I just got it as a side dish in other genres (speculative fiction, mostly-- a genre with almost as many image problems as romance).
Then I inherited the duties of developing my library's romance collection, and I HAD to start reading romance. (You really can't do a decent job building a collection you know nothing about, after all.) I started seeking out well-reviewed romances and reading more widely in the genre (with the help of Ms. Wendell's blog, I might add), and I realized what a lot of romance readers have known all along: sure, there's trashy romance out there. But there's also really GOOD romance, the type that makes you feel like you know the characters personally, the type that makes you agonize and analyze their relationship problems the way you would your best friend's. The type that helps you think through your own problems of the heart, and teaches you... well, all the things Sarah learned in order to write this book.
This is the book I want to give to everyone who's ever been dismissive of romance of a genre, to every woman (or man) who's hidden a book with clinch cover inside her jacket so passers-by couldn't see it and judge her for it. Go read. You won't regret it.
I was a latecomer to the romance genre. In my teen and college years, I didn't have a lot of respect for the "trashy novels" my female relatives gobbled up so quickly (and, given that this was in the 80s and 90s, a good deal of it probably WAS trash). I'd tried a few, and they were all formulaic cardboard, about as romantic as a little girl picking up her Ken and Barbie dolls and smooshing their faces together. The so-called heroes treated their women like possessions and seemed to have no respect for them-- and I didn't either. (Ah yes, the age of the classic alphole romance....) I wasn't against romance as an idea, I just got it as a side dish in other genres (speculative fiction, mostly-- a genre with almost as many image problems as romance).
Then I inherited the duties of developing my library's romance collection, and I HAD to start reading romance. (You really can't do a decent job building a collection you know nothing about, after all.) I started seeking out well-reviewed romances and reading more widely in the genre (with the help of Ms. Wendell's blog, I might add), and I realized what a lot of romance readers have known all along: sure, there's trashy romance out there. But there's also really GOOD romance, the type that makes you feel like you know the characters personally, the type that makes you agonize and analyze their relationship problems the way you would your best friend's. The type that helps you think through your own problems of the heart, and teaches you... well, all the things Sarah learned in order to write this book.
This is the book I want to give to everyone who's ever been dismissive of romance of a genre, to every woman (or man) who's hidden a book with clinch cover inside her jacket so passers-by couldn't see it and judge her for it. Go read. You won't regret it.
May 2, 2013
How fine is it to re-iterate reading romance novels (is not only fun), but a learning experience for romantic relationships!
Smart Bitches Trashy Books co-writer Sarah Wendell embarks on an exploration on the benefits of spending the day reading about billionaire oil tycoons and rugged cowboys. The book covers a variety of themes, and how romance readers have been influenced through their lives- allowing teenagers to tentatively explore sexuality, but not necessarily giving in to peer pressure; the kick-ass heroines making women feel empowered and well, kick-ass themselves; reflecting book situations onto real life and striving for betterment; and how the sexy times keep many a long marriage from going stale.
Ms. Wendell keeps the chatty, conversational tone for most of the narrative- things that we have instinctively realized as a side effect of reading romance, but not having the statistics to back them up.
Two things to take home from this book (apart from lots and lots of pointers on the 'ideal man')-
90% of romance readers can recollect the very first romance novel they read.
For me, who sneaked in bodice-rippers from the library at 13 and read them covered in brown paper, the whole 'thrill of the conquest' high with my school mates is unforgettable. Sort of amazing, that even people who picked up romance in their late teens remember details so clearly.
The account on how romance helped a reader who was sexually abused as a child was touching. Her struggle to heal and keep demons at bay, to fit into normal society, and most importantly, to hope in a better future, is going to stay with me for a long time..
Smart Bitches Trashy Books co-writer Sarah Wendell embarks on an exploration on the benefits of spending the day reading about billionaire oil tycoons and rugged cowboys. The book covers a variety of themes, and how romance readers have been influenced through their lives- allowing teenagers to tentatively explore sexuality, but not necessarily giving in to peer pressure; the kick-ass heroines making women feel empowered and well, kick-ass themselves; reflecting book situations onto real life and striving for betterment; and how the sexy times keep many a long marriage from going stale.
Ms. Wendell keeps the chatty, conversational tone for most of the narrative- things that we have instinctively realized as a side effect of reading romance, but not having the statistics to back them up.
Two things to take home from this book (apart from lots and lots of pointers on the 'ideal man')-
90% of romance readers can recollect the very first romance novel they read.
For me, who sneaked in bodice-rippers from the library at 13 and read them covered in brown paper, the whole 'thrill of the conquest' high with my school mates is unforgettable. Sort of amazing, that even people who picked up romance in their late teens remember details so clearly.
The account on how romance helped a reader who was sexually abused as a child was touching. Her struggle to heal and keep demons at bay, to fit into normal society, and most importantly, to hope in a better future, is going to stay with me for a long time..
January 11, 2012
The word of the day is: Derivative.
Wendell brings her Smart Bitches, Trashy Books shtick to the world of self improvement with only middling results, possibly because the majority of Everything I Know seems to have been lifted directly from either her previous book (Beyond Heaving Bosoms) or the SBTB website.
There's nothing particularly offensive or annoying here, but neither is there anything especially illuminating or insightful. Wendell seems to rely on only a handful of romance writers to illustrate her points - So we meet again, Nora Roberts! - which seems a bit odd for a woman whose claim to fame is running a romance review website, but I suppose there's nothing wrong with playing favorites.
The colloquial tone, intended to be humorous, left me cold by and large, and I think the only truly hearty laugh I got out of this was from the chapter on how romance novels can teach me about sex - and frankly, that giggle came from the irony of reading a chapter like that written by the same woman who spent a huge amount of time in her previous book deriding romance novels' incredible misrepresentations of and ignorance about anatomy.
Not terrible, but reads a bit like something gimmicked up by the publishing house to take advantage of Valentine's Day sales.
Wendell brings her Smart Bitches, Trashy Books shtick to the world of self improvement with only middling results, possibly because the majority of Everything I Know seems to have been lifted directly from either her previous book (Beyond Heaving Bosoms) or the SBTB website.
There's nothing particularly offensive or annoying here, but neither is there anything especially illuminating or insightful. Wendell seems to rely on only a handful of romance writers to illustrate her points - So we meet again, Nora Roberts! - which seems a bit odd for a woman whose claim to fame is running a romance review website, but I suppose there's nothing wrong with playing favorites.
The colloquial tone, intended to be humorous, left me cold by and large, and I think the only truly hearty laugh I got out of this was from the chapter on how romance novels can teach me about sex - and frankly, that giggle came from the irony of reading a chapter like that written by the same woman who spent a huge amount of time in her previous book deriding romance novels' incredible misrepresentations of and ignorance about anatomy.
Not terrible, but reads a bit like something gimmicked up by the publishing house to take advantage of Valentine's Day sales.
November 13, 2011
"You don't see adult gamers being accused of an inability to discern when one is a human driving a real car and when one is a yellow dinosaur driving Mario Kart, but romance readers hear about their unrealistic expectations of men almost constantly." Word. Of course women are too stupid to know fiction v. reality, right? Haaaate.
Half of my reaction to this book was similar to my reaction to the Glee concert movie - I know fans, I don't need this much focus on them, where's the good stuff? But the basis of the book is solid, and shows pretty well why the romance genre is booming at a time when everything else is suffering and why it makes for good, fun, empowering reading.
Half of my reaction to this book was similar to my reaction to the Glee concert movie - I know fans, I don't need this much focus on them, where's the good stuff? But the basis of the book is solid, and shows pretty well why the romance genre is booming at a time when everything else is suffering and why it makes for good, fun, empowering reading.
November 6, 2011
I knew I'd laugh. I didn't expect to cry (the bit about the purses....sniff...)
February 9, 2017
Really endearing book!!
Loved it! Will recommend to my friends, who still think romance novels are wasting of time. Hopefully it will change their mind.
Loved it! Will recommend to my friends, who still think romance novels are wasting of time. Hopefully it will change their mind.
April 12, 2023
Loved all the quotes from authors and readers. Was a little long? Certain parts I found to be a little repetitive. Overall, it was good though. I really connected with a lot of text as to why people read romances and the takeaways they draw from the stories.
September 6, 2011
EVERYTHING I KNOW ABOUT LOVE I LEARNED FROM ROMANCE Novels by Sarah Wendell is a joyous celebration of those novels we all love to read, romances.
Contemporary, historical, time travel, urban fantasy--we can't get enough of these stories. And not just because of gorgeous heroes with ridged muscles and large…ahems. Whatever trials the hero and heroine suffer in these courtship stories, the book always ends with a Happily Ever After (HEA). In an imperfect world, romances give us hope that we can solve our own relationship problems, too. And not only solve them, but find the love and happiness we deserve.
What a fun book! I had a great time breezing through Ms. Wendell's thoughts on romance. Written in her witty, upbeat style, Ms. Wendell, with numerous comments and excerpts from romance novelists, dissects the attraction that has made romance the best selling, as well as the most vilified, fiction genre. Romances give us permission to value ourselves and show us the types of men to slaver over and the ones to avoid. In these novels, we can solve our relationship problems, learn how to ask for what we want, and even (gasp!) find out about sex--what we like, what we don't and what we didn't even know existed.
Ms. Wendell's most important point is that in a romance, the woman counts. I came to romance for that very reason. My preference in novels is a rousing fantasy adventure tale. But men wrote most of them and the women characters were either subsidiary or non-existent. In romance today, I can find the stories I like with the heroine right up there kicking butt alongside the hero. What's not to like?
Ah, romances. We sweep through them enjoying every moment. And when we finally reach the end and our beloved HEA, we savor it because the hero and heroine deserve it.
And so do we. Enjoy.
ARC supplied by Sourcebooks
Contemporary, historical, time travel, urban fantasy--we can't get enough of these stories. And not just because of gorgeous heroes with ridged muscles and large…ahems. Whatever trials the hero and heroine suffer in these courtship stories, the book always ends with a Happily Ever After (HEA). In an imperfect world, romances give us hope that we can solve our own relationship problems, too. And not only solve them, but find the love and happiness we deserve.
What a fun book! I had a great time breezing through Ms. Wendell's thoughts on romance. Written in her witty, upbeat style, Ms. Wendell, with numerous comments and excerpts from romance novelists, dissects the attraction that has made romance the best selling, as well as the most vilified, fiction genre. Romances give us permission to value ourselves and show us the types of men to slaver over and the ones to avoid. In these novels, we can solve our relationship problems, learn how to ask for what we want, and even (gasp!) find out about sex--what we like, what we don't and what we didn't even know existed.
Ms. Wendell's most important point is that in a romance, the woman counts. I came to romance for that very reason. My preference in novels is a rousing fantasy adventure tale. But men wrote most of them and the women characters were either subsidiary or non-existent. In romance today, I can find the stories I like with the heroine right up there kicking butt alongside the hero. What's not to like?
Ah, romances. We sweep through them enjoying every moment. And when we finally reach the end and our beloved HEA, we savor it because the hero and heroine deserve it.
And so do we. Enjoy.
ARC supplied by Sourcebooks
September 21, 2011
Well, if you're familiar with Sarah Wendell, then you're probably familiar with her website, Smart Bitches, Trashy Books. Sarah has been an outspoken advocate for the romance genre. She takes it one step further and breaks down the subtle and not so subtle nuances of the romance genre. This isn't a dry, dull text but a fun and insightful look at why romance novels are so popular and have been for decades and how readers can benefit from reading them.
Through interviews of both readers and authors, Wendell talks about what is important in a good romance novel and how readers are able to relate to the characters whether they be human or something else altogether. Much of this information we as reader are familiar with but by giving examples and discussing excerpts, she gives readers even more to talk about. The excerpts will no doubt have readers nodding their heads either in agreement or remembrance of reading that particular scene and how it made them feel. Wendell also gives those of us still made to feel embarrassed about reading romance novels good reasons why we shouldn't be.
All of this is done with Wendell's trademark humor and sarcasm. Nothing is taboo here. EIKAL is an interesting looking into the world of romance novels for both lovers of the genre and skeptics alike.
Through interviews of both readers and authors, Wendell talks about what is important in a good romance novel and how readers are able to relate to the characters whether they be human or something else altogether. Much of this information we as reader are familiar with but by giving examples and discussing excerpts, she gives readers even more to talk about. The excerpts will no doubt have readers nodding their heads either in agreement or remembrance of reading that particular scene and how it made them feel. Wendell also gives those of us still made to feel embarrassed about reading romance novels good reasons why we shouldn't be.
All of this is done with Wendell's trademark humor and sarcasm. Nothing is taboo here. EIKAL is an interesting looking into the world of romance novels for both lovers of the genre and skeptics alike.
February 2, 2012
Everything I Know About Love I Learned From Romance Novels is more than just a passionate defense of a much-maligned genre. It is a how-to book on achieving happily-ever-afters in the real world. Although it isn't perfect, this little book is full of great advice, affirmation, and hope.
Sarah Wendell's writing style is chatty and entertaining, but sometimes it reads a little too much like a blog. In my opinion, she uses a bit too much slang and internet-speak. She also loves run-on sentences. On the plus side, her irreverent humor had me chuckling through most of the book. Tucked in between the humorous passages and quotes from authors and readers are some gems of real wisdom. Here is one of my favorite quotes:
"In a romance novel, things will always be OK in the end, and if they're not okay, it's not the end. The same can be said of real life: there is a second chance, another day, another opportunity to try again and make everything a little bit better, because happy endings take work."
Wendell did get some of her novel references wrong (she confused the plot of one Immortals After Dark novel with the title of another, for instance), and her writing could have used some better editing. But in spite of its flaws, Everything I Know About Love is a fun book for die-hard romance-lovers and a great introduction to the genre for new readers.
Sarah Wendell's writing style is chatty and entertaining, but sometimes it reads a little too much like a blog. In my opinion, she uses a bit too much slang and internet-speak. She also loves run-on sentences. On the plus side, her irreverent humor had me chuckling through most of the book. Tucked in between the humorous passages and quotes from authors and readers are some gems of real wisdom. Here is one of my favorite quotes:
"In a romance novel, things will always be OK in the end, and if they're not okay, it's not the end. The same can be said of real life: there is a second chance, another day, another opportunity to try again and make everything a little bit better, because happy endings take work."
Wendell did get some of her novel references wrong (she confused the plot of one Immortals After Dark novel with the title of another, for instance), and her writing could have used some better editing. But in spite of its flaws, Everything I Know About Love is a fun book for die-hard romance-lovers and a great introduction to the genre for new readers.
February 25, 2013
This is a great defense of romantic fiction that talks about how the books can help, educate and encourage the readers.
Despite what people who don't read romance books claim, it isn't all about porn and the mighty wang and the magic hoo-hoo. It is about communication. It's learning what to expect in a relationship and how to get it. It is what to be wary of and how to recognize what you don't want.
Romance books can teach you what turns you on and what turns you off. The more erotic books can even help you discover your kinks or whether you don't have any at all.
Readers and writers chime in to give their own opinions and personal experiences. And, as always, Sarah lends her own personal brand of humor to keep things from getting too analytical. If the name is familiar, but you can't place the name, think Smart Bitches, Trashy Books.
I was lucky enough to score this ARC (Advanced Reading Copy) and loved it. The book itself will be published in October. I would recommend it to anyone who loves to read romance, hates defending it, but also know that there is more to it than HEA (Happily Ever After). For many readers, it is the journey, not just the destination.
Despite what people who don't read romance books claim, it isn't all about porn and the mighty wang and the magic hoo-hoo. It is about communication. It's learning what to expect in a relationship and how to get it. It is what to be wary of and how to recognize what you don't want.
Romance books can teach you what turns you on and what turns you off. The more erotic books can even help you discover your kinks or whether you don't have any at all.
Readers and writers chime in to give their own opinions and personal experiences. And, as always, Sarah lends her own personal brand of humor to keep things from getting too analytical. If the name is familiar, but you can't place the name, think Smart Bitches, Trashy Books.
I was lucky enough to score this ARC (Advanced Reading Copy) and loved it. The book itself will be published in October. I would recommend it to anyone who loves to read romance, hates defending it, but also know that there is more to it than HEA (Happily Ever After). For many readers, it is the journey, not just the destination.
October 12, 2018
If you enjoy romance, I think you'll quite enjoy this one. It didn't blow my mind but it was a good, quick read that I'm glad I picked up. Sarah Wendell's love for romance is clear. She obviously loves it and wants to help dismantle some of the stigma associated with romance. It was nice to read about the various aspects of romance as it helps non-romance readers to better understand the breadth of options available in romance today. All in all, I'm glad I read it.
November 30, 2011
I don't often say this about a book, but dang it's pretty. I was quite disappointed with the e-version of this book then I received a paperback. It feels nice. It's inside covers are gorgeous. I'm in love with the physical version of this book. As much as I love my nook, sometimes you just can't beat the real thing in your hands. Sigh.
This book is a love letter to romances. If you've ever been skeptical about reading romances, Ms. Wendell may change your mind. She makes the case for why reading romance novels is a fun and emotionally healthy activity for women (and men!).
This book as well as Beyond Heaving Bosoms: The Smart Bitches' Guide to Romance Novels are must reads for any aspiring romance novelists. Ms. Wendell does a great job of breaking down the elements of what makes a romance novel successful.
This book is a love letter to romances. If you've ever been skeptical about reading romances, Ms. Wendell may change your mind. She makes the case for why reading romance novels is a fun and emotionally healthy activity for women (and men!).
This book as well as Beyond Heaving Bosoms: The Smart Bitches' Guide to Romance Novels are must reads for any aspiring romance novelists. Ms. Wendell does a great job of breaking down the elements of what makes a romance novel successful.
February 8, 2012
I enjoyed the conversational tone of the book, the snarky humor of Sarah Wendell that came through clearly and the topics selected. I also liked seeing the quotes from romance authors and readers.
I'm not going to say too much about it, but this book had me laughing, nodding my head in agreement, snickering some more, grinning and even incredibly emotional (the very real, raw story of how one woman used reading to literally save her life...). I had a very hard time putting this book down last night, and ended up reading it in one sitting.
We that read and love romance novels know the value of it - this isn't going to say much that you probably haven't already thought, but it is packaged together very nicely and supported really well with a lot of quotes.
Downside to ebook version: the charts aren't the easiest to read, but I didn't have that much of a problem either.
I'm not going to say too much about it, but this book had me laughing, nodding my head in agreement, snickering some more, grinning and even incredibly emotional (the very real, raw story of how one woman used reading to literally save her life...). I had a very hard time putting this book down last night, and ended up reading it in one sitting.
We that read and love romance novels know the value of it - this isn't going to say much that you probably haven't already thought, but it is packaged together very nicely and supported really well with a lot of quotes.
Downside to ebook version: the charts aren't the easiest to read, but I didn't have that much of a problem either.
January 7, 2012
I'm not a huge fan of romance novels, especially since my to-read list usually hovers around 50+ books already, so that probably explains my disinterest in this particular book praising the romance novel. The author is a well-known romance book blogger, and her book reflects that particular style of writing. Some of the points are valid, but overemphasized or presented sloppily.
If you are looking for an academic or critical review of the romance genre, this is not for you. If you are looking for a fluffy read about the positive attributes of romance novels, this may be your cup of tea.
If you are looking for an academic or critical review of the romance genre, this is not for you. If you are looking for a fluffy read about the positive attributes of romance novels, this may be your cup of tea.
May 22, 2016
Nowhere near as entertaining as Beyond Heaving Bosoms. Less laughs, and more...well, I think this is strictly for romance fans, to have their opinion reflected, because I doubt this will change non-believers' minds. The only thing I got out of it was the piece about men holding women's purses in the waiting rooms of cancer centres while the ladies have treatment. THAT is romantic, but that was from a real life article, and NOT in a romance novel, so... Yeah, this book didn't work for me. (I still haven't figured out how to answer the "favourite dictator" question.)
January 30, 2012
This book reminded me that it was okay for me to read romance novels. It was okay for me to like romance novels and it was okay for me to talk about reading/liking romance novels. This book is something I would give all romance readers/writers big or small just to show them how romance novels have impacted our lives for the better and how we have learned to have better relationships with people in our lives from reading romance novels. One of my favorite things about this book however, was how it referenced romance novels and gave me a huge list of books I need to read/or re-read. Love it!
August 14, 2015
Embrace your love for romance novels.
They're not simply a way to fill your time.. romance novels exist for many reasons, people read them for many different reasons and it's okay to love the love!
If you read romance novels read this book, if you've ever thought about reading romance novels or wondered why people read romance novels I recommend you read this book too!
They're not simply a way to fill your time.. romance novels exist for many reasons, people read them for many different reasons and it's okay to love the love!
If you read romance novels read this book, if you've ever thought about reading romance novels or wondered why people read romance novels I recommend you read this book too!
November 5, 2011
I enjoyed this, but thought it lacked both the thematic cohesiveness and the comic punch of Beyond Heaving Bosoms.
September 15, 2014
This is a must read for any fan of romance or anyone who wants to improve their relationships.
June 4, 2020
A funny, light read perfect for these weird times. Nothing groundbreaking, but as a fan of SBTB it was an enjoyable bedtime book.
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