<![CDATA[Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason]]>

false <![CDATA[Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason]]> http://photo.goodreads.com/books/1171649080m/111209.jpg 111209 3 Most parenting guides begin with the question "How can we get kids to do what they're told?" and then proceed to offer various techniques for controlling them. In this truly groundbreaking book, nationally respected educator Alfie Kohn begins instead by asking, "What do kids need -- and how can we meet those needs?" What follows from that question are ideas for working with children rather than doing things to them.One basic need all children have, Kohn argues, is to be loved unconditionally, to know that they will be accepted even if they screw up or fall short. Yet conventional approaches to parenting such as punishments (including "time-outs"), rewards (including positive reinforcement), and other forms of control teach children that they are loved only when they please us or impress us. Kohn cites a body of powerful, and largely unknown, research detailing the damage caused by leading children to believe they must earn our approval. That's precisely the message children derive from common discipline techniques, even though it's not the message most parents intend to send. More than just another book about discipline, though, Unconditional Parenting addresses the ways parents think about, feel about, and act with their children. It invites them to question their most basic assumptions about raising kids while offering a wealth of practical strategies for shifting from "doing to" to "working with" parenting -- including how to replace praise with the unconditional support that children need to grow into healthy, caring, responsible people. This is an eye-opening, paradigm-shattering book that will reconnect readers to their own best instincts and inspire them to become better parents. 1390192 2005 Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason total:483|5:214|4:174|3:67|2:23|1:5| 483 2018 907 173 3 7 false false Wed Jan 21 19:20:59 -0800 2009 Mon Oct 08 09:58:26 -0700 2007 Wed Jan 21 19:20:59 -0800 2009
What is it about “gentle” parenting types that makes them so obnoxious? Why does the phrase “unconditional parenting” make me want to hurl? Why do “lactivists” make me want to offer their children Dr. Pepper in a baby bottle?

But rea...more...]]> 2 1 false false Wed Jul 02 22:22:53 -0700 2008 Wed Jul 02 22:23:23 -0700 2008 more...]]> 5 2 false false Tue Apr 15 00:00:00 -0700 2008 Wed Jan 30 07:06:08 -0800 2008 Tue Apr 15 10:00:09 -0700 2008 more...]]> 3 1 false false Thu Mar 19 00:00:00 -0700 2009 Tue Mar 24 06:29:11 -0700 2009 Tue Mar 24 06:31:36 -0700 2009 more...]]> 1 2 false false Wed May 14 08:44:31 -0700 2008 Wed May 14 08:51:02 -0700 2008 more...]]> 5 0 false false Fri Feb 27 14:48:17 -0800 2009 Fri Feb 27 14:48:26 -0800 2009 more...]]> 4 2 false false Thu Oct 09 00:00:00 -0700 2008 Mon Jan 19 20:29:52 -0800 2009 Mon Jan 19 20:29:52 -0800 2009 more...]]> 4 0 false false Thu Oct 01 11:51:23 -0700 2009 Thu Oct 01 12:17:37 -0700 2009 more...]]> 3 0 false false Sun May 10 00:00:00 -0700 2009 Sun Apr 19 20:35:59 -0700 2009 Sun May 10 15:25:10 -0700 2009 1 Punished by Rewards The Trouble With Gold Stars, Incentive Plans, A'S, Praise, and Other Bribes, and I decided to follow up with this one.

Kohn believes that using punishments, or rewards, communicate the idea that parents love their children when they do ...more...]]> 5 0 false true Tue Feb 24 00:00:00 -0800 2009 Wed Feb 11 19:38:45 -0800 2009 Wed Feb 25 15:21:25 -0800 2009 more...]]> 3 0 false false Sun Mar 01 00:00:00 -0800 2009 Sat Sep 26 15:35:11 -0700 2009 Sat Sep 26 15:45:48 -0700 2009
1) It will make you think about your approach and philosophy and whether you are being the parent you want to be
2) It will remind you to think of a situation from the kid's perspective
3) Kohn's platitudes are impossible ...more...]]> 5 1 false false Thu Jun 04 00:00:00 -0700 2009 Fri Jun 05 09:03:10 -0700 2009 Fri Jun 05 15:20:27 -0700 2009
Kohn's basic philosophy is eerily similar to one that I've been developing through the past 4 years of working with teenagers. In fact, Kohn uses some of the same terminology th...more...]]> 3 0 false false Tue Sep 01 15:43:48 -0700 2009 Wed Oct 21 19:26:28 -0700 2009
One of the things that helped me to keep reading was the fact that the author backs up most of his ideas with research. Granted you can find...more...]]> 4 1 false false Fri Nov 13 00:00:00 -0800 2009 Thu Jul 02 11:03:48 -0700 2009 Fri Nov 13 06:39:13 -0800 2009
in a nutshell kohn basically says that you need to be nice to your kid--and ...more...]]> 3 0 false false Sun Aug 16 00:00:00 -0700 2009 Wed Jul 01 19:59:31 -0700 2009 Mon Aug 17 19:59:55 -0700 2009 more...]]> 3 0 false false Fri May 01 00:00:00 -0700 2009 Sun Nov 09 13:38:04 -0800 2008 Sat May 23 09:44:19 -0700 2009 more...]]> 5 0 false false Sun May 01 00:00:00 -0700 2005 Tue Oct 14 12:43:18 -0700 2008 Thu Dec 11 01:09:12 -0800 2008 more...]]> 5 1 false false Tue Oct 28 00:00:00 -0700 2008 Fri Sep 19 09:43:24 -0700 2008 Tue Oct 28 10:46:51 -0700 2008 more...]]> 4 0 false false Tue Jul 08 00:00:00 -0700 2008 Sat Jul 05 06:29:30 -0700 2008 Tue Jul 08 10:47:06 -0700 2008 more...]]> 4 0 false false Tue Jul 01 00:00:00 -0700 2008 Fri Jul 04 21:48:06 -0700 2008 Fri Jul 04 21:49:17 -0700 2008 more...]]> http://www.goodreads.com/book_link/follow/8?book_id=111209