Around the House and in the Garden: A Memoir of Heartbreak, Healing, and Home Improvement

by Dominique Browning

"My story," writes Dominique Browning, the editor in chief of House & Garden, "is about the way a house can express loss, and then bereavement, and then, finally, the rebuilding of a life."

Around the House and in the Garden is a moving narrative, culled from Browning's much-loved monthly editorial column, about the solace and sense of self that can be found through tending to one's home. From building a high stone wall in the garden to learning that every kitchen deserves a good kitchen couch, Browning reminds us that making a home is more than just a materialistic endeavor -- it is a way for us to comfort and reinvent ourselves, to "have the final word about what goes where...what feels comfortable, what is life enhancing...and gives us strength to go out and embrace the world.

Genres: Gardening, Nonfiction, Memoir, Biography, Biography Memoir, Essays, Self Help

208 pages, Paperback

First published May 18, 2002

About the author

Dominique Browning writes a monthly column called Personal Nature for the
 Environmental Defense Fund website. She is a regular contributor to the New
 York Times Book Review and also writes for O, Body + Soul, Wired, and
 Travel & Leisure, among other publications. Before House & Garden she 
worked at The Edison Project, Mirabella, Newsweek, Texas Monthly, and Esquire. She is the
 author of Around the House and In the Garden, and Paths of Desire:
 The Passions of a Suburban Gardener. She is the mother of two sons;
 her new house and garden are on the coast of Rhode Island.


Reviews

[Carol Brill · Rating 4 out of 5]

Voice and writing that knows how to use exactly the right detail to evoke memory and emotion set this book apart for me. The structure is more linked essays than chapters, so there isn't a strong plot line, and yet, there's enough story. This is not a book I would have picked up on my own, but read for a book club and glad I did.
In the early days and aftermath of divorce, Dominique Browning writes about how her home and garden reflect her inner-most feelings and progress, or lack of it in moving on.
So much resonated with me; A Lifetime of Closets-what we're looking for in the things we store and keep; Home Alone-how we build and dismantle a life and home; Letting Go-what we need and want from the rooms of our life.
A favorite take-away from the essay on Letting Go - You're living like a clenched fist.

[Relyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved House and Garden magazine under Dominique Browning's leadership. One of my favorite things each month was her essay at the start of each magazine. I actually have a binder full of them that I ripped out of each month's magazine. This memoir was even better. If you could see my Kindle, it is full of highlights. I love Dominique Browning's writing.

[marie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Dominique Browning used to the editor of House and Garden until it suddenly closed shop. I always looked forward to reading her “Letter from the Editor”. They were graceful ruminations in life, most frequently about well, home and garden. This collection of short essays remind me why I was such a fan.
“My story begins with the end of a marriage, the end of a household, the end of a home. It is about mourning, and the passage through what I came to think of as a living death ---or perhaps, living a death. “, she starts.

“No way to compare notes in a hurry, no way to correct course quickly because someone notices something when the other isn’t paying attention.” is her observation of what you lose when a marriage dies, and this sums up for me what I think is the biggest loss.

Of gardening, she says:”it is an activity at once companionable and solitary, deeply solitary. There is something about the concentration it requires that shuts out the world, or disti8lls it into the small things at hand.”

The NYTimes said: “Browning has the unerring gift for capturing revelatory events” ---and insights. Read this book with a cup of te3a in a quiet nook while a tree lends its shadow over your seat.

[Bat713 · Rating 3 out of 5]

Easy to read. I couldn’t relate to this super emotional author who seemed to create and cause her own heartbreak. She needed a good shaking. I did find some treasures in her stories about her garden and Home.

[Joy · Rating 5 out of 5]

As I was thinking about favorite books I have read, the two books by Dominique Browning (she has a third that was published in 2010) are among my all-time favorites. In fact, when I first read this book several years ago, I immediately started reading it again. I very rarely reread books, so that was my highest compliment. I liked it just as much this time. I was a faithful reader of Browning's monthly column when she was editor of 'House and Garden.' In fact, I think I clipped and saved most of those columns. I agree with this: "Dominique Browning describes more eloquently than anyone else how our homes shape and support and change with our lives. She is a superb storyteller. She shares her unique and appealing blend of warmth, wit, and domestic wisdom, and the result is moving and personal as well as useful and inspiring." One of her observations that I certainly share is: "The last thing I wanted to see, or hear, during the days when I was without my own children, was someone else's family. It was time to leave." Bet she would also hang out at parks without playgrounds. When her boys were young, they would often have 'reading room' where they would light a fire and curl up together in chairs with their books. Summary: "Home is the place we control, the place where we have the final word about what goes where, what stays, what feels comfortable, what is life-enhancing. Home is the place into which we invite love and from which love prospers and emanates."

[Brian Want · Rating 3 out of 5]

I snagged this from the dusty and dubiously labeled "memoirs of ordinary people" bay at my favorite used bookstore. As a minimalist, I'm not the typical or intended audience, but I was planning to redecorate my tiny apartment and found myself thinking about space, comfort, coziness, and the filament between my spartan home interior and my ostensibly rich interior life. :)

My main annoyance with this book is that the author is a well-bred, patronizing, quietly captious, privileged woman who reminds me of my college classmates' mothers from long ago--speaking of snap decisions to buy second houses on the Rhode Island coast, of "kitchen couches" like they're normal, of deciding on china patterns as a teenager, and (as though reprimanding me personally) of her terribly unfortunate middle-aged friend who lived with the "distinct staleness of street-find furniture and plank-and-block bookcases." Okay, then! My books are shamed in their shabby digs, Ms. Browning.

Nonetheless, she does have a way of capturing with grace those small moments of realization, reframing, and peace that become touchstones through trying times. And thus I still feel obligated to give the book 3 stars.

[Loraine · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked all of this book but I loved much of it. I think that there is plenty to love here but which parts are meaningful may be different for each reader. About one third of this book was so good that I made personal notes in order to remember the images, remember the feelings that they invoked.

[Book Barmy (Bookbarmy.com) · Rating 3 out of 5]

House & Garden editor-in-chief, Dominique Browning, wrote a monthly column for the magazine and this lovely book brings together those columns. They cover personal stories and essays about home decorating, gardening, and raising children with universal themes of domestic life.

In Around the House and in the Garden, Browning adapts and expands these well-loved pieces, adding dozens of new essays, to create an insightful and moving narrative about the solace and sense of self that can be found through tending one’s home.

Ms. Browning weaves in many reflections on her life in her two homes. The houses come to symbolize the state of her heart and mind. Some are sad, as she tries to bounce back from a divorce, yet it’s also a wonderfully uplifting book. I loved reading about her journey of healing while remaking her home and her reflections on gardens, decorating, and cultivating the comforts of a home.

It especially speaks to anyone starting over in their lives after a divorce, but could be just as useful to anyone attempting to create some kind of spiritual retreat in which to nurture their bodies and souls.

[Janice · Rating 3 out of 5]

I received Around the House and in the Garden from a fellow book club member at our annual book exchange. Thanks Thia. There is lots to love in Dominique Browning's writing. . . the nurturing of home, hearth, garden in helping to heal our wounds. Yet, I truly felt sorry for Browning's long and drawn out years of depression and suffering over her failed marriage. She never mentions seeing a professional, only her sadness and inability to move on; finding gardening and decorating therapeutic. ( Her resources may have been better spent on the couch of a good psychiatrist.)

[Amy Mast · Rating 5 out of 5]

It's hard to find all the words, but it was lovely. As someone who has lived many different homes with various people over the years, I can resonate so much with what she says. I'm going through my own difficult time with setting up a home for various reasons & it was so comforting to know that I'm not alone in my struggle. I'm adding this one to my favorites shelf.

[Clark · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not what I expected but I still enjoyed it. This is a book about after the divorce. Nice to read about how she deals with it and how she feels about it. Also some on how the kids deal with it. Just glad I didn't go through this with my wife and kids.

[Denise Grinols · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved it!

[Vanessa · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some sad and some heart lifting themes.

[Darcee · Rating 4 out of 5]

A heartwarming memoir that shows how healing, growth, and spirit can be nurtured by our home and garden around us.

[Maya · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sweet and easy reading love this book 🍒🐾

[Sylvia Swann · Rating 4 out of 5]

A beautiful melancholy book still full of hope for a brighter day. Thanks so much for sharing your journey sweet Dominique!

[Caroline Robert · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good beach read. Well written and easy to read 🤸

[Ruth]

The first sentence in this book is: “When I was divorced my sense of home fell apart.”
So I took it out of the library and read it quickly, chapter by chapter.

Unhappily, I know of three very dear people in my life going through a divorce. I can’t really say I would recommend this book to any of them, unless they won’t be bothered by the affluence of the author. (When my sister had cancer, I would read a book about someone w/ cancer and say, “you probably don’t want to read this…”)

This book is what I would call a pre-fab book. It might not have been essays or articles previously published in Gardens and Walls or whatever fancy magazine the author edited. But it very well could have been, chop, chop, chop, each chapter title a phrase or word--”piano” about a piano, and “arm chair love” about a chair…

I did not hate this book, but it did not really resound with me. I probably would read it again, though. It is nicely written and it isn’t the authors’ fault she’s rich! She does seem like a cool person (maybe).

My standard complaint of not enough sex or, in this case, no yearning for sex. As usual, her hubby finds a new dish and she stays single. I imagine her like the SusaN Sarandan, as the ex-wife the step mom film.

Anyway it was okay but I would not take it on a desert island with me…

[Mary · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love it when I stumble upon a book on a library's shelf that is perfectly suited to my current situation in life. Dominique Browing is a magazine column writer whose eloquent if not painfully accurate thoughts on divorce, raising kids jointly, and surviving the monumental task of creating a singular home from what was once shared spoke to me on every level. The undercurrent of pain and melancholy are peppered and uplifted by her knowledge of the natural world (gardening and botany), stories from her childhood (her music-loving Moroccan-bred mother was an exotic character), and savvy interior decorating tips (oh how I wish my kitchen and bathroom were big enough to house a comfy leather couch, as she recommends!). I have kept her book in mind as I've worked on making my new house a home, including as many places for nurturing and respite for me and my children as was possible. The only thing that kept it from being five stars for me was that almost every chapter was in column form...only 3 or 4 pages long. I wish she'd expounded more! But it's a wonderfully healing book, as so many of her thoughts are shared by me about what it means to lose the blessing of being with your children every hour of their life. So glad I found this book.

[Stephanie Johander (A Fun House) · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dominique Browning, the editor of House and Garden magazine, is a wonderful storyteller. A quote from the inside cover describes this book perfectly "Around the House and Garden is a book for anyone who has ever felt the need to reinvent a life or a space, who has ever fallen in love with the idea of home- the place where we reinvent ourselves...". I love each chapter as Ms. Browning's short essays weave their way through various house projects in relation to how they help her heal from a painful divorce or are meaningful to her everyday life. Her stories touch on relationships with her teenage sons, the gigantic sofa she keeps in her kitchen, the horror of finding something dead in the fireplace chimney- who to call for help?, her over-run garden, giving herself 'permission' to redecorate her bedroom, her driveway with all it's deep, huge imperfections. This is a book I have read again and again because of its beauty in the face of heartbreak and its keen insights into relationships- both with our homes and the people in our lives. The final sentence of the inside quote describes our homes perfectly as "...a place that gives us strength to go out and embrace the world." So true.

[Doriana Bisegna · Rating 3 out of 5]

I first heard of Dominique Browning through an article that was reprinted in our Montreal Gazette. I loved her writing style: honest, simple and revelatory. I quickly googled her and found that she has written three books that I quickly purchased. This is the first that I've read and each chapter is a snippet of a part of her home life. I am so jealous of her home and they way she finds beauty and comfort in the most mundane things...a fireplace, a chair, her bathtub...each chapter had me reflecting on how much my home is a living breathing entity on its own..and we are the ones that breather life into it or out if it!! I already have a list of projects that will bring my home back to life and this book only proved what I've always believed...your home relects where you are in this moment...one day my home will reflect all the joy and happiness that has been bottled up inside of me and that will explode onto the walls, furniture, patio and garden!!! FRIENDS BEWARE!!!

[Carol · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved Dominique Browning's Slow Love, so when I saw Around the House and in the Garden: A Memoir of Heartbreak, Healing and Home Improvement in the stop at the New York Botanical Garden last Saturday (June 21), I grabbed it. I wasn't disappointed. This collection of short pieces is like a beautiful box of artisanal chocolates-I savored each one. I felt Browning's emotions and was able to see the world as she does. Reading this made me more determined than ever to have a home (as opposed to just a house) and a garden. A lovely book.

[Rachel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dominique Browning, editor of House & Garden magazine is one of my favorite writers. Her editorial pages each month are beautiful, charming and just awesome. She muses on all things surruonding the interior and exterior space of our homes. Her first memoir shares how her home helped her move the grief of a painful divorce through vignettes that discuss the comforts and pains of home. I love this book.

[Karen · Rating 4 out of 5]

There is something I love about Dominique Brown's soothing tone throughout this book. I actually read it in two nights a couple of years ago, but I pulled it back out because it seemed like a good summer read. I have been reading a chapter a night before bed--and it's the perfect bedtime story. Though she's mourning the loss of her marriage, she doesn't harp on it, but beautifully conveys some good life lessons.

[Denise Kruse · Rating 5 out of 5]

I enjoy Dominique Browning's writing. I used to look forward to her editorials in the now defunct House & Garden magazine because she brings a poetry, a sensitivity to one's home, one's life. She's not afraid to "go there", to admit her lows and share her highs. In this book, she achieves that with beautiful narrative about her own house and garden. I appreciate her sensibilities; often her writing makes me think I am speaking with an introspective, yet generous friend.

[Melinda · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dominique Browning is one of my "go-to" authors when I'm feeling a bit down in the dumps. Often, I'll read her books and essays once-a-year just because I love her writing. Within this book, she has created an insightful and moving narrative about the solace and sense of self that can be found through tending one's home and garden, the place where perhaps we can reinvent ourselves. A treasure indeed.

[Lindsey · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked this book and the author's exploration of how a home reflects and impacts the emotional needs of its owner. She writes really well and many of her descriptions are lovely. My main complaint is that the 'chapters' were way too short for me, more like essays, and I found myself wanting her to say more about a particular subject.

[Helena · Rating 3 out of 5]

After re-reading the summary of this book, I know I've read it, I just can't remember when, nor much about it. I'm giving it three stars as a middle-of-the-road rating because I obviously neither liked nor disliked it enough for it to make a huge impression. Maybe someday I'll re-read it to find out....

[Jakki · Rating 2 out of 5]

I felt sad during and after reading this book. A true story about a woman's journey through and subsequent years lived out in her garden and home. It was painful to read as she talked of how a house "knows" when a family is breaking up. I experienced that myself when the pipes burst after new owners moved into my old house - it was crying in grief; the same thought this author had.