Death Becomes Them: Unearthing the Suicides of the Brilliant, the Famous, and the Notorious

by Alix Strauss

Author Alix Strauss takes a provocative look at the self-imposed deaths of the famous and infamous in Death Becomes Them. In this fascinating and intimate chronicle of celebrity suicides, the spotlight shines on the lonely last moments of Kurt Cobain and Ernest Hemingway, Abbie Hoffman and Adolf Hitler, Dorothy Dandridge, Sigmund Freud, Hunter S. Thompson, and others. Death Becomes Them explores their sadness and madness, their accomplishments and the circumstances that led to their irreversible decision, and wishes them all a fond final good-bye.

Genres: Nonfiction, Death, Mental Health, Mental Illness, Biography, History, Psychology

325 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2009

About the author

Alix Strauss is a trend, culture and lifestyle journalist; an award-winning, four-time published author; speaker; and frequent contributor to The New York Times.

Her books include: The Joy of Funerals (St. Martin’s Press & Palagram Press), Based Upon Availability (Harper Collins), and Death Becomes Them: Unearthing the Suicides of the Brilliant, the Famous and the Notorious (Harper Collins). She is also the editor of Have I Got a Guy for You (Simon & Schuster), an anthology of mother-coordinated dating horror stories. Her work has been optioned for several TV and film projects.

A media-savvy social satirist, she has been a featured lifestyle, travel, and trend writer on national morning and talk shows including ABC, CBS, CNN, and the Today Show. During the past 25 years she has written over 1500 articles. Her articles, which have appeared in Elle, Harper’s Bazaar, Cosmopolitan, Marie Claire, Conde Nast Traveler, the Financial Times, Time Magazine, and Departures, among others, and cover a range of topics from trends in beauty, travel, and food to celebrity interviews.

The Joy of Funerals is an Ingram Award winner and was named Best Debut Novel by The New York Resident. Alix was the inaugural “First Chapters” pick, Cosmopolitan Magazine’s new launchpad of fiction excerpts, giving readers exclusive sneak peeks of gripping new work. Her essays and short fiction have appeared in the Primavera Literary Journal, Hampton Shorts Literary Journal, The Idaho Review, Quality Women's Fiction, The Blue Moon Café III, Sex, Drugs & Gefilte Fish: The Heeb Storytelling Collection, and A Kudzu Christmas. Her short story, “Shrinking Away”, won the David Dornstein Creative Writing Award. She is the recipient of several awards and fellowships from programs such as the Wesleyan Writers Conference, the Skidmore College Writerʼs Institute, the Sarah Lawrence Summer Program, and the Squaw Valleyʼs Screenwritersʼ Summer Program.

Alix lectures extensively and has been a keynote speaker, moderator, or panelist at over 200 conferences, symposiums, seminars, and summits including The Southern Festival of Books, The Northwest Bookfest, The New England’s Writer’s Conference, Wesleyan Writer’s Conference, The 92nd Street Y, New York University, Center for Communications, University of Connecticut, and Columbia University. She was chosen to speak at the National Jewish Book Festival and is on the National Speakers Bureau for Israeli Bonds.

Alix Lives in Manhattan.

Reviews

[Shannon Breen · Rating 2 out of 5]

Like others have noted, this book is so full of errors as to be ridiculous. I was shocked to see an editor mentioned in the acknowledgements. This book truly reads like a self-published book. The wording is often strange, apparently there was no fact-checker, and I seriously wonder who (if anyone) did the proofreading. Based on this book apparently Hitler was active in politics in 1993. The subject matter is interesting, but the list of online sources makes me question the reliability of anything written. My high school aged son isn't allowed to use Wikipedia as a source for a research paper and yet this woman uses it for a book? Harper Collins should be ashamed to put this out.

[Jessica · Rating 1 out of 5]

How do I give negative stars?

My enjoyment of this book came to a SCREECHING halt on page 170. Wherein the author prints the English translation of the song “Gloomy Sunday” THAT IS NOT GLOOMY SUNDAY. I cannot get past such a glaring mistake. In fact the poem or lyrics or whatever they are that are printed don’t even contain the words gloomy or Sunday in them at all. How does this happen? Furthermore, the author makes the claim that this song resulted in suicides and that radio stations banned it as a result, a fact that has been widely discredited and is devoid of any substantiation to these claims. She might as well perpetuate the theory that people put razor blades in Halloween candy.

After this I questioned every fact, statistic and statement contained within, especially since she lists Wikipedia (WTF?) as one of her selected sources. Hmmm… why don’t you just cite Twitter as well I’m sure they both rival each other in accuracy.

I marvel at this author’s sheer audacity to pass this off as non-fiction. And if you happen to read this review author, you seriously suck.

After reading through the reviews, it appears I am not the only one that has issues with her specious book.

[Karen Germain · Rating 3 out of 5]

Alix Strauss explores the methods and reasoning behind famous suicides in history, breaking the sections based on the profession of the deceased. She also includes facts and statistics about suicide.

I saw this book a few years ago at Powell’s and it has been sitting on my TBR bookcase. I decided to take it on a recent vacation to Los Angeles and finished it up while waiting at a car dealership. I have to warn would-be readers that the subject matter and book cover will initiate some very awkward conversations with strangers. A car salesman seemed to think that I might be suicidal and offered some deep advice. It got weird.

I’m not suicidal. However, this book would not be a good choice for a person who has suicidal ideation. Strauss provides some very specific information about methods of suicide. This is information that anyone could easily find with an internet search, and she certainly doesn’t glorify suicide, yet to a person who might be having those thoughts, I could imagine that reading this could influence them. One of the statistics that startled me the most involved suicide by jumping, how bones breaking and piercing organs is usually the cause of death. I never thought about bones piercing flesh and that is an image that I have had on my mind.

I picked this book because I have been affected by suicide. My father killed himself with a gun shot to the head. This trauma has shaped my life and I’m forever trying to understand it. Krauss’ chapters on suicides using guns was of particular interest to me. I don’t have clarity on the “why”, but I now understand the mechanics of the method.

I found many of the stories to be fascinating, particularly what leads people to kill themselves. I discovered that Dorothy Dandrige is buried in the same mausoleum as my parents- they are death neighbors! Her story is especially tragic. I was particularly interested in the chapters involving writers. Hemingway was such a character. I also connected with the Kurt Cobain section. He died when I was a teenager and was the first big celebrity death that I felt impacted by. I remember going to school the next day, wearing my Nirvana shirt, and feeling a sense of mourning with my friends. It may seem like teenage melodrama in hindsight, but reading about Cobain’s public funeral took me back to that time and those emotions.

I found Death Becomes Them to be an engrossing read, but due to the subject matter, I would be hesitant to recommend it, as it was made abundantly clear through Strauss’ examples, you never know what is really going on in a person’s mind. Also, if you read it, don’t carry it around in public, unless you want some uncomfortable conversations and unsolicited advice.

[Kara · Rating 1 out of 5]

Did anyone *read* this before it was published? This book has more laughably awkward sentences, overly dramatic prose and incorret word choices than any book I can remember. It reads like it was written by a fifteen year old goth girl. Also, most of the information is available on Wikipedia, at about the same level of writing skill. Skip!

Edited to add: Just looked at the references in the back, and the first "invaluble" research tool Strauss lists is Wikipedia.

[Cait · Rating 1 out of 5]

I would say that the editor of this book did an abysmal job, except I don't think there even was one.

[Jade · Rating 4 out of 5]

Can you call a book about suicide fun? That's really pretty much what this is--a fun trivia type book about suicide. Each chapter discusses a certain subset (musicians, writers, actors etc) and the last few chapters are a combination of famous suicides. The author touches on statistics, history and medical science on each subject. Makes for very interesting reading and covers everyone from Kurt Cobain to Sigmund Freud (I had no idea he was a suicide--though reading of his medical condition it's certainly understandable--cancer of the jaw for 16 years--yikes). At times humanistic and touching and other times interesting based on the medical science involved or the complications of the cases (for example, actor Albert Dekker CLEARLY did not commit suicide but no investigation, no murder). My big complaint would be for such a well researched book there were definitely some mistakes--mostly minor about who was married to who and things of that nature but there are some repeated rumors that are easily disproved (the famous rumor that Diane Arbus photographed her own suicide) and leaving out some of the most famous suicides (Lupe Velez). Alas...I am nitpicking. I enjoyed the book.

[Julie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting enough, but truly not executed as well as it could have been. However, for what it was and was meant to be, namely a casual summary of the life and death of some of the most famous people to have commuted suicide, it was good. The sources are iffy as are the stated facts, but for someone looking to satisfy that need for a macabre browse without needing scholarly support it certainly is enjoyable.

All that said, I would have liked to have seen a little more empathy. I know it meant to state facts, but I felt like it lacked just a little bit of the compassion required in a book on such a heavy and human subject. I think that less people could have been covered, instead using the space for reflection, and that there should have been some sort of prologue with perhaps a trigger warning and information on suicide prevention and signs.

My favorite part of this book might just have been the section at the end where those famous who have attempted suicide and survived were listed. To see actors and celebrities that I am familiar with having had such terrible thoughts and come out of it to create a great deal more work is encouraging.

[Wendy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting facts and historical aspects of some "famous" folks.

[Thomas Sulmon · Rating 5 out of 5]

I lack words to describe how interesting this reading was to me. I had been in a weird relationship with non-fiction for a while, having previously read several books showing all the same flaw : repeating their main point, again and again, disheartening even readers with the best intentions and genuine curiosity.

This book is exactly the opposite. We are travelling through time, discovering the inner lives and clockwork of various personas all linked by one thing : the way they died.
While looking at all these shortened life, I wrote a lot of personal thoughts and asked myself quite some questions during this reading, which I classified in 3 main “groups”.

1) Does being disruptive, creative and smart go together with having a death wish/loneliness?
Artists and geniuses often live in the margins of society; how does it influence their decision to commit suicide ?

-> Suicide and darkness have long plagued the ultra-creative. Their self- destructive vices and passion for excess follow them like a trail of empty bottles, and often beg the chicken-or-egg question. Is it their sadness that makes them so brilliantly creative, or does their brilliance and ability to create induce their sadness?
There’s no disagreeing that death obsessions, pain, and deep complexity are themes of artistic geniuses’ work, that they define their material. When famed abstract artist Mark Rothko gave a lecture at the Pratt Institute on the ingredients and recipe for making a work of art, he stated, “There must be a clear preoccupation with death.” He continued by adding in some sensuality, mixing in tension and irony, wit and play for the human element, and a touch of the ephemeral, and chance. Stir and let sit, then end with hope. “Ten percent to make the tragic concept more endurable,” he insisted.
The failure of his band Attila led Billy Joel, a then depressed alcoholic, to attempt suicide in late 1970 by drinking furniture polish. “It looked tastier than bleach,” he shared in Hank Bordowitz’s biography of the singer- songwriter, Billy Joel: The Life and Times of an Angry Young Man. The suicide note he left later became the lyrics to his song “Tomorrow Is Today.”
And there isn’t an art historian who will deny that van Gogh did some of his most impressive, most important work—like many others in this book— while in the throes of a deep depression. Starry Night was created while van Gogh was in a mental institution. “The more I am spent, ill, a broken pitcher, so much more am I an artist, a creative artist,” he once admitted, adding that he put his heart and soul into his work, “and have lost my mind in the process.”
Much of their selves ends up in their opuses. They vomit up their feelings, hoping it will empty them out. And yet, each morning or evening, after a drink or two or three, after the pills have stopped working and the drugs have worn off and they’ve returned from Oz, they are still filled with pain, stuck with their inner devils and demons. After choking on their sadness and drowning in genius, suicide seems like a suitable solution, instant relief from a lifetime of agony. More than the body of work an icon creates, what will forever define him becomes his suicidal act. The intriguing stories around his death make him a shadowy figure who lurks in the forefront. A ghost who hovers.

2) The influence of childhood and genetics. Is it in the blood?

-> If suicide is genetic and runs in the family, the Hemingway family tree is heavy with mental illness. At fifty-seven, his father, a physician who conditioned his son to “be afraid of nothing,” shot himself with his father’s Civil War pistol. Two of Hemingway’s five siblings, Ursula and Leicester, also took their lives, as did his forty-one- year-old granddaughter Margaux, who overdosed on sedatives in 1996. His son Gregory, who changed his name to Gloria after a sex-change operation, died in police custody after being picked up in a drunken stupor.

-> Of the five authors highlighted in this book, each dealt with abandonment issues. Hemingway’s father shot himself when the author was twenty-nine. Hunter’s died when he was fourteen. Virginia was twenty-two when her father passed away, which caused her second nervous breakdown. Sylvia’s died days before her eighth birthday. And Anne, who lost both parents during the year she turned thirty-one, never felt loved or wanted by hers. Worst was John Berryman, who was eight when his father walked outside their home and shot himself below his son’s bedroom window. For all these fatherless figures, the profound loss greatly affected their work, and for many, it became the thematic thread of their material.

3) Why do so many people kill themselves when everything seemingly goes well for them?

-> Examples of Peg and Abbie, which both seemed back on tracks, with new projects and things to hope for.

But of all these dark stories, none touched me more than the one of Sylvia Plath. 4 insane facts about it.

- She asked her neighbor living upstairs when he would go to work, maybe secretly hoping he would smell the gas and save her (we will never know). She almost killed him, as the fumes got to his room!!!!!

- Her mother didn’t attend the funeral; neither did her two children, which only fed into the terrible cycle created by Sylvia’s mother when she refused to let Sylvia attend her father’s memorial, a decision Sylvia never forgave her for (!!!). History is a flat circle, as confirmed by the next fact.

- In 2009 Sylvia’s forty-seven-year-old son, Nicholas, was found by his girlfriend having hanged himself in his Alaskan home. Only a year old when his mother died, the professor of fisheries and ocean studies battled depression for much of his life. As if trying to break a suicide cycle, neither he nor his sister chose to have children. His father, who died from cancer in October 1998, was fortunate not to be a witness to yet another family tragedy.

- Ted, Sylvia's husband, was cheating on her with Assia for quite some time. Six years after Sylvia’s passing, Ted’s second wife, Assia, killed herself and their four-year-old daughter in a pathologically eerie way. In March 1969, the couple had had an argument over the phone. Though Assia had set the table for lunch and was expecting Ted home, she sent the nanny on an errand, dragged a mattress into the kitchen, sealed the door and window, and turned on the gas. She and her daughter drank sleeping pills dissolved in a glass of water, then lay down and went to sleep under the woozy, fuzzy fumes from the oven. Can you imagine : the two women you loved committing suicide the same way??? And 2 of your children as well???

The second one is Van Gogh, about whom I honestly didn't know much, except for the fact he cut one of his ears. The reality of it is way darker and pathetic than I would ever have suspected.

-

Rarely have I been so baffled by historical facts, often re-reading a sentence to make sure my eyes haven’t failed me. Here are some examples :

- Peg Entwistle is the only person who committed suicide by jumping from the Hollywood sign. But did you know this? "Sadly, no Hollywood story would be complete without a sardonic ending. Two days after her suicide, a letter from the Beverly Hills Playhouse arrived for her offering her the lead role in their upcoming production. She would have played the part of a young woman who commits suicide. (!!!)"

- Peg’s stepson, three-time Emmy-nominated actor Brian Keith, who was best known for playing Uncle Bill on CBS’s 1960s TV hit Family Affair, killed himself in 1997, two months after his daughter, Daisy, killed herself—making them three generations of suicides. (!!!)

- Sid Vicious from the Sex Pistols had a tumultuous relationship with his girlfriend Nancy. But did you know this? "Supposedly, before Sid’s mother died in 1996, she admitted to sneaking into the girlfriend’s apartment and injecting her son with enough heroin to kill him while he slept (!!!), stating that she was fearful he’d be found guilty of killing Nancy and didn’t want him to go to prison."

- In 1939, hours after World War II started, Unity Mitford, a well- known British aristocrat who was infatuated with Hitler, sat on a park bench in Munich and put a bullet through her head. She survived the incident but died a few years later from the injuries. (!!!)

- in 1930, there was a vogue, in the 1920s and early Depression era, for gags based on the concept that backfiring suicide was funny. Disney used the concept, and some comics were released where Mickey Mouse attempts suicide (!!!).

- 5 people I had no idea did suicide attempts : Walt Disney, Elton John, John McCain, Eminem and J.K.Rowling (!!!)

[J · Rating 1 out of 5]

There is a bit of a joke running with this book now due to the fact that my sister gave it to me and didn't clarify (she said she did) to me I wasn't suppose to read it. Well as you can tell I did read it, it was terrible and pathetic as well as a waste of time while she eagerly awaits my review after having dodged the bullet herself.

In most other instances a book about death would or could be an interesting read depending again on the author and how it reads. Unfortunately, though, this book is about suicide, which is a rough idea to embrace to start with but also one that is a of a very delicate nature to be dealt with so freely. What makes it worse is the fact the author chose to focus on those who were more or less trying to escape the limelight of fame with its evils while this book is forcing them to become yet another specimen to be jabbed at, dissected and studied at one's will. Whatever happened to Rest In Peace?

Another point of contention is the writing itself with its selection of people. I didn't know many of those that were included so their suicide wasn't a point of interest (thus making the book a flop to begin with) while I felt more pity at them for being put on display, especially if you consider all the wrong information that was included. Doesn't this sound like paparazzi? Being hunted in death to make the masses salivate over their personal tragedies - distasteful!

The writing was pocked with errors and read like a bad book - mediocre, bland and without a focal to attract the eye. Furthermore as much as the author tries to also bring up the fact of copycat suicides she doesn't seem to consider her book could be a similar catalyst while also at the same time willingly providing information to those who may be playing with suicidal ideations - if you are please don't she is missing on some of the methods important info.

All in all steer clear and respect these poor souls who tried to escape the world the only way they could see at the time the act was done. Pray for them and try to reach out for those who need your help in staying rooted while you will respect their memory in a more decent manner than rifling through the details of their tears.

[Liana · Rating 1 out of 5]

I read all the reviews about this book and how certain facts were incorrect but I continued to read because it was a topic I love. Approximately half way through the book I came across Ian Curtis and his suicide and that's where I'm stopping. She makes careless mistakes in spelling that bother me so much. Calling Bernard Sumner "Bernard Summer" when a few paragraphs later she quotes Curtis' daughter and writes "Sumner" correctly. She talks about the bands album "unknown pleasures" and manages to spell it correctly and then refers to it in a different paragraph as "Unearned Pleasures". How lazy can you be?! Or how cocky to not proof read?! Regardless, I'm done w this book. Hopefully someone takes this concept and does it right!

[Sarah · Rating 2 out of 5]

Ummm... I would think that prior to writing a book like this you would fact check, then have someone else fact check, AND then someone in the editing/publishing room would fact check. But I know nothing about writing a book. This is a fast interesting read until you read details that are incorrect, and then when you reach the end after second guessing everything you've been reading ...there are the sources...and Wikipedia and IMDB are the first two sources listed... Yeah.

[Mary · Rating 1 out of 5]

I thought I'd find this more interesting than I did. Ultimately it just felt a bit exploitative. Should not be read by anyone who's considering or has considered suicide.

[AJ Salamy · Rating 4 out of 5]

I FLEW to finish reading this book so I could leave my review in response to some of y’alls nerdy ass comments. I was thoroughly entertained and it made me think a lot, two of the most important criteria for books in my opinion. Yes maybe there were some inaccuracies, but to be fair I saved this book from the trash so I had low expectations. I liked getting to learn more about influential artists that were all tortured by the cruel conditions of life, and I walked away with a greater respect for their art/achievements. I WILL say that the lyrics to Gloomy Sunday were laughably completely wrong but it was more amusing to me than anything else.

[ForenSeek · Rating 4 out of 5]

Though the topic of the book is admittedly an acquired taste, for us amateur thanatologists this is a special treat. The cases have been selected carefully, and there are stories here even I (obsessed with death since my early teens) had never heard. The writing is a bit awkward in parts, and there are some factual errors here and there (especially in the chapter on the last days of Adolf Hitler), but these small mistakes don't take away from the overall reading experience. "Death Becomes Them" also works as a way to learn about obscure aspects of history and human culture, regardless of whether you're death-obsessed or not. Interesting, entertaining read for these darkening Autumn nights.

[Andrew · Rating 4 out of 5]

You'd think this thing could easily be kind of crass fluff, but actually, I found reading the various accounts of suicidal deaths of various famous persons brought out patterns that did give me some insight into the deaths of suicides I've known personally. The most telling patterns being deaths of parents or abandonment (also by parents) in the early lives of many of Strauss's subjects, as well as patterns of repetative or relentless misfortune (rather than a single traumatic experience). Well worth a look.

[Bamboozlepig · Rating 1 out of 5]

The glaring inaccuracies, typos and other mistakes made this a chore to get through. But I forced myself to finish it because I've had a string of DNF's and felt compelled to completely read SOMETHING...ANYTHING...all the way through. And I wish I'd picked something different because this one wound up being rather boring, despite the morbid subject matter. Strauss didn't do much justice to the suicide victims she featured, mostly due to the inaccuracies in so many of their stories.

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a fascinating and lively book--a really enjoyable read. I knocked off a star, though, because I spotted several typos and errors. For example, Oliver Sacks's name is misspelled as Oliver Saks, it says that Hitler became the Chancellor of Germany in 1993, and Sylvia Plath's death location is erroneously listed as being her Devon house, when in fact she died in north London.

[Kaylyn · Rating 2 out of 5]

Interesting but (unsurprisingly) depressing. I appreciate how this is organized throughout making it easy to read and jump around the sections — basically it’s just a big list of notable suicides. I’m clearing out my bookshelf.

[Pug · Rating 3 out of 5]

Starting off strong, it began to drag on and on. I didn't even know most of the people who wrote about, so I really didn't need all the minute details. Some heavy editing would have gotten this book to half its size. And then maybe I would have finished it!

[Ami Lea · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book. It’s full of interesting facts and trivia, and I appreciate how Strauss explored the mental health and relationship dynamics of the authors, musicians, actors, and artists she covered. A good read!

[Wendy Capron · Rating 2 out of 5]

It's like People magazine only with suicide. I wouldn't have read the whole thing if I weren't so morbid.

[Theremin Poisoning · Rating 4 out of 5]

An interesting book full of information. My only complaint is the occasional faltering in the writing style. Still, a worthwhile read.

[Alissa · Rating 5 out of 5]

Utterly fascinating.

[Sam Emch · Rating 4 out of 5]

Pretty interesting read. Learned quite alot about people and suicides. I feel like it could of been shorter though. Like a lot of stuff I feel was repeated, overall good book.

[Hannah · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really enjoyed reading this. Thought the detail on method of suicide was unnecessary but generally enjoyed reading about celebrities and the famous deaths!

[Ebb · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting.

[C · Rating 1 out of 5]

TW

It refers to Anne Sexton having an “incestuous relationship” with her daughter, and even uses the term “lover”. She molested her daughter. She abused her daughter. To use the word lover when describing a vile abusive act is foul and irredeemable.

As well, there are numerous factual inconsistencies and outright incorrect entries throughout the book, that a simple google search can prove. I would assume the research portion of this work took mere minutes of the author’s time.

[Alli H · Rating 5 out of 5]

A lot of people are dogging on the writer because of the way she listed her sources in the back of the book. Nevertheless, this book was easily digestible and a quick read. I actually enjoyed reading this and I have not read a whole book in years. It got me back into the groove of reading and I found it interesting as a true crime/morbid curiosity junkie. I have lost a lot of people to suicide and so it has always fascinated me. Learning about historical suicides and the copycat suicides to follow was interesting.

[Mindi · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is a study of suicide that uses celebrity cases, not so much to glamorize the act, but to allow and the reader case studies of people they are familiar with. The book presents a number of famous suicides, and then succinctly deconstructs what could possibly cause those people to end their lives prematurely.

Suicide is a tough subject to study, but Strauss manages to present the facts without too much sensationalism or theorizing. Humans have always had a certain fascination with death, and for those who cannot imagine taking their own lives, this book attempts to offer an explanation as to why some people simply cannot go on.

There is also a number of general statistics and studies about suicide within the population as a whole.

This is a heavy read, but one that can certainly help people understand why friends, loved ones, and even celebrities they idolize can no longer live with the demons they carry.