Walking Out on the Boys

by Frances K. Conley

In May 1991, Frances K. Conley, the first female tenured professor of neurosurgery in the country, made headline news when she resigned from Stanford University to protest the medical school's unabashed gender discrimination. In this controversial, forthright memoir, Conley portrays the world of academic medicine in which women are still considered inferior; she also explains why, as a consequence, the research and treatment of women's health problems lag far behind those of men. In assessing why women's careers and psyches are suffering, Conley provides a first-person look into what it is like to be an accomplished woman within this restrictive medical world, offering invaluable advice to patients and future doctors alike.

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction, Medical, Medicine, Biography, Autobiography, Feminism

264 pages, Paperback

First published April 1, 1998

Reviews

[Ashley · Rating 5 out of 5]

I feared that this book would feel dated in the era of #MeToo but it didn't. In fact, sadly, this book felt as relevant today as it did when it came out 20 years ago. Dr. Conley's book recounts her medical training and the events that lead up to her resignation from Stanford in 1991. She writes with real thought and reflection about the rampant culture of sexism in American medical education and about her own complicity. She offers both a clear-eyed take on a culture that demeaned, ignored, harassed, and violated women with an explanation of what dynamics unique to medicine and academia allowed that culture to flourish.

This is not an "easy" read but it it is an important one for anyone who cares about how medical care evolved or what women face when they enter into a male-dominated field -- even if it's a white collar field that requires a great deal of education and training. Accomplishment will not protect women seems to be the lesson Conley had to learn before she could begin working toward real, sustained cultural change.

[Beth Haynes · Rating 4 out of 5]

Riveting story of an accomplished neurosurgen's experience of sex discrimination in the highly competitive field of academic medicine.
I did not experience the degree of discrimination described by this author (neither in training nor in practice) - but her career was 10 years before mine, and entrenched in academia which is a different beast than private practice. That said, her description of initially swimming with the tide, and accepting behaviors and attitudes as "just the way it is," makes me wonder how much I tuned out.
It's hard to know if today the pendulum has swung too far, from the previous cover-ups of blatant sexual harassment and abuse of power into hypersensitivity and an assumption that men are guilty until proven innocent.Neither posture is healthy nor grounded on individual human dignity.
Stories like Dr. Conley's are important in our growth toward a fully just and nurturing culture.

[Michael Connolly · Rating 3 out of 5]

Stanford University neurosurgeons acting like frat boys. Many of these professors, doctors and scientists cannot relate to a woman professional as a professional, but only as someone to flirt with. I use to oppose women invading all-male social clubs, but after reading this book, I realize that we need the civilizing influence of women in order to avoid regressing into a more primitive part of the brain.

[Annika Mogck · Rating 4 out of 5]

Do you ever just wanna scream WOMEN DESERVE RIGHTS TOO!!!!!! Bc same

[Lisa-Michele · Rating 4 out of 5]

The book was a re-read for me which I needed to re-visit 30 years later for many reasons. I read it first in the 1990s when I was a young woman struggling with the unrelenting sexism present in my corporate legal career. I was a lot like Dr. Conley; I was naïve about what type of resistance I would encounter in a man’s world. Back then, her story was very validating for me. Dr. Conley was the first woman in the country to be a tenured professor of neurosurgery; she worked at Stanford University. In her daily workplace her fellow doctors propositioned her, fondled her, groped her, called her names, insulted her, and stood in the way of her progress more times than she could count. I related to it viscerally, both when I first read it and upon re-reading. Nothing has really changed.

I remember being so impressed with Dr. Conley for her courage in resigning her prestigious position when the university didn’t take her complaints seriously. She had waited to complain, after decades of mistreatment, until one of the worst offenders was promoted to the chair of her department. No matter how stellar her credentials, her work ethic, and her reputation, the men in charge responded by ridiculing her, minimizing her concerns, and taking away her options. “My professional career had progressed because I was willing to be a ‘good sport’ and accept harassment, rather than challenge or question it and risk alienation, dismissal, or not being promoted. Instead, I chose to join the existing system…” After she resigned, Stanford negotiated her return by promising to investigate, but the bad guys ended up winning.

Reading it again after my own decades of hitting the glass ceiling or being thrown off the glass cliff - or whatever metaphor we are now using – was sobering. I saw my own indefatigable optimism throughout my career. I saw how many times I kept trying to break through, how I kept thinking that when I was 40 or 50 years old, at the top of my game, I would finally transcend the sexism nightmare. Nope. As a 50-something leader in the state court system I was asked by my boss to dress up in a leotard at a work conference and do Zumba to entertain the men. For the first time I stood up for myself, called BS, and advocated for myself and the dozens of women court employees watching me. That’s me, always hoping I could change things, hoping I could find a path that wasn’t as a victim, that wasn’t diminishing of my skills. I lost. I quit. I went on to another dream. To my granddaughters I say: don’t give up, things might get better, reach for your dreams, but do not waste any time thinking you will be the exception. Find allies early on and stand up for yourself.

[Nicholas · Rating 4 out of 5]

At times the book is a bit too much of a play by play, but it's also a pretty riveting account of Conley's decision to leave (and then return to) her position as a tenured professor of neurosurgery at Stanford because of sexual harassment and a prolonged climate of hostility and gender discrimination, all embodied in the possibility of her most sexist colleague being promoted to chair. I definitely wanted to find out what happened, no question.

It's also really interesting to see -- only about 14 years after the book's publication and about twenty after the incidents -- how the concept of sexual harassment is now so well understood, at least by many. Conley is articulate in talking about how much she was unable to understand or explain exactly what was wrong with her work environment at the time. She had not, for instance, been told she must sleep with her boss or lose her job. Rather, she and other women at Stanford had been made to feel on a daily basis that they did not matter because they were women, that they would never truly belong. All of this was done through inappropriate touching, sexist jokes, being passed over for honors/lab space/promotions/etc. While I have no doubt that all of these things persist in many places, and maybe especially in academic medicine, what does seem to have changed is that we have more of a language to name this type of behavior and work environment. And there is at least the possibility of recourse. Of course we partially have Frances Conley to thank for that. As well as Anita Hill and countless others who have told their stories or made complaints at great personal sacrifice.

[Megan · Rating 4 out of 5]

It makes me feel ways about stuff.

[Susan · Rating 5 out of 5]

A long time ago (~1998). But this is one i will never forget.
Saw the author speak in a small town hall in Danville, CA.
She was AMAZING!
Loved her, this book, and her story.

[Alicia Borowski · Rating 5 out of 5]

There are no words to express how much Dr. Frances Conley means to me. I have read her book multiple times for inspiration and healing during my sad career.
As Dr. Conley was leaving sexist Stanford in May 1991, I was entering the agricultural seed business in California with a freshly minted Ph.D in Horticulture at age 32.
I was ready to conquer the world or at least make a respectable living and have some fun?

Thankfully, I was not subjected to sexual harassment. I think my looks were a B minus and I projected a friendly, no BS attitude. I was from the Philadelphia area and we are known for our spunk. I was there to work.

However, the verbal harassment & BS in terms of questioning my every managerial!!! decision was exhausting. I could gone on for days! Dr. Conley, my heroine, helped me cope!

IF a brilliant female neurosurgeon!!!! at Stanford (allegedly a more liberal institution??) was treated like crap, then I had absolutely NO hope with these good old boys in agriculture.
Dr. Conley set me straight and to lower my expectations of success any any potential rise to management within any company.
I would fight endless battles every day just because I was not like the other scientists. I was the first female PhD at the company I started with in 1991, also again in 1996 at a Japanese seed company.

Every day I would say to myself, “The good old ‘smart’ boys drove Frances out, all you can do is show them your grit and get the job done the way you see fit} So much time wasted on their BS.
I am retired now and have some form of PTSD from it all. All I ever wanted was to do practical, applied science (this was industry not academia), maybe have some productive discussions with colleagues, and of course sell products. no GMOs. Our commercial farmer seed treatments improved seed placement during planting with equipment and improved germination due to cold or high temperatures. Not rocket science but very important for the commercial lettuce producer in CA.

The WMD (white mediocre dudes) drama was endless and idiotic. Yes, literally! The Mexican men, and the white and Asian women in the Seed quality labs were the ones who sustained me and kept me going with our share of mutual respect. I learned so much from those colleagues because they were the ones touching and working with the seed 8 hrs a day.

I hope things have improved for women in the workplace. I sure did not have a good time. Wage was good and CA was nice. I do realize I was still more fortunate than millions of women workers.

[Left Coast Justin · Rating 2 out of 5]

I read this a long time ago, when it first came out, and do not have the details in front of me. I am almost afraid to publish a two-star rating, because I can already see all the eye-rolling: "Oh, of course he didn't like it, he being a member of the white patriarchy that Conley was taking to task in this book."

But that really wasn't the problem. I am, by and large, a champion of the underdog, but to me, this was kind of like listening to professional athletes complaining about their pay. It really was eye-opening how petty a lot of this was -- who got the bigger office or the nicer furniture and things like that.

A good writer can get a lot of juice out of unfair employment and reward practices. I have no reason to doubt Conley's skills as a surgeon, but this litany of complaints, no matter how valid, was not riveting reading.

[Maurice J · Rating 5 out of 5]

Frances Conley tells how she had to fight the old boys/MDs club at Stanford Medical School and win. I was privileged to meet her and hear her talk about what she went through. It should be read by everyone to see just how bad life is for women entering non-predominant female professions. She is brilliant, the book is brilliant, and she is a hero for the feminist movement who has largely gone unnoticed--but not at Stanford Med School or among the women medical students who she has nurtured and helped succeed.

[Roxie Sebastian · Rating 5 out of 5]

I met Dr. Conely approximately 60 years ago. She was our swim and diving coach in Menlo Park while attending to her studies. To me she was known as Fran. She was funny, witty and always had a warm smile for us. I spoke to her a few times in regards to medical issues on my side. She welcomed any questions I had and answered in a way that was easy to understand.

Her book is very engaging and certainly more enlightening, and I plan on reading it again.

I'm certain you will enjoy it.

[Frank Hennessey]

Dr Conley, I really need you again. In 1991 you did surgery at VA Polo Alto. Hospital
relieved the most pain no one should go through. You card me Adonis. I'm deAling with the same thing now. 831 588 5654.

[Rachel]

My review from 1999: The author's account of her awakening to institutional sexism and pervasive sexual harassment in academic medicine, to which she was exposed as a neurosurgeon at Stanford. The book is relevant to the entire medical profession. Very good.

[Sam · Rating 5 out of 5]

Highly recommended. Read this a few years ago (after I left science). Only wish I had known about it sooner.

[Lenny Husen · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was an exceedingly well-written memoir. While Dr. Conley isn't someone I would call likable or warm, being intimidating and a bit chilly, she is an amazing person, and her story is remarkable. I think I started it and after a few chapters was thinking, "WHAT the HECK does she have to complain about???!"
I applied to Stanford Medical School in 1994 and was rejected, and as I was sobbing and sobbing uncontrollably lying naked on the cold kitchen floor it never occurred to me that a woman who WAS actually accepted to Stanford Medical school, who THEN was at the top of her class there, who became a surgeon at a time when women didn't become surgeons, who THEN became the MOST prestigious kind of surgeon, who became the first female tenured Neurosurgeon in the entire US of A, who was the first woman to win the Bay to Breakers 9 mile foot-race, who was happily married, could throw javelins for Pete's sake, publish research paper after research paper on brain tumours and be invited to read those papers at national conferences, who had friends and colleagues and a very full life, living in a beautiful house in a gorgeous part of California, running in the hills in the morning with her dog, who was incidentally very attractive, STILL could be unhappy, miserable at age 50 and burned out.
At one point she almost puts down women who go into "traditional fields of medicine" such as Psychiatry and Internal Medicine and Family Medicine. Geez, those fields were all I ever wanted to do even in my wildest dreams, and I was rejected from even those aspirations, that she categorizes as being somehow lesser than Surgery.
However, I had to become fonder of Dr. Conley, as the story went on, and empathize with her description of the subtle exclusion and discrimination that has been a partner to my own life and struggle. Because Gender discrimination, Racial prejudice, and Ageism are real, and it isn't a case of the titillating "fanny grab" but more of the hurtful "no one sitting next to you at meetings" kind of thing.
I do NOT think of Dr. Conley as a hero, but I do think of her as a role model for her recovery from burnout and finding a different path for herself, while still remaining part of the Stanford Academic and Surgical community. She didn't compromise or flee, she fought, and she won the right for others to speak up against being marginalized. It isn't a battle that all of us are going to win, and the road is paved with losers of both sexes.
I couldn't ever get into Stanford Medical School, but after reading this book, I realize that I deserved to be accepted, and that means a lot to me.

[Liz VanDerwerken · Rating 5 out of 5]

Frances Conley's memoir of her experiences of the institutionalized sexism of Stanford's School of Medicine is scathing, riveting, and enlightening. She is an excellent writer and expresses her thoughts with such precision and clarity. Conley attended medical school in the 60s, concurrently with the era of Second-wave feminism. Thus her perspective is an interesting one, as she didn't view herself as a feminist under the circumstances; rather, her actions (her resignation at the appointment of a sexist colleague to department chair) reflected her objection to an executive decision made which she felt affected her on a personal level, her being a woman a major part of it certainly, though not the foremost catalyst in her mind. It is an interesting nuance, which defines much of the account and offers interesting comparisons between Conley and the modern feminist. No matter her views on her place in the feminism spectrum, enlightened Americans championed her and her cause as it made headlines nationally in the early 90s, and I found a lot to consider while reading about her experiences.

[Melissa · Rating 3 out of 5]

My daughter thought it was a good book but that the author was a bit of a whiny pants. I was more horrified at the author's original attitude to the sexism and sexual harassment she and the other women in med school, in the hospital and academia, received. She even told a female med student to basically suck it up if she wanted to be a doctor. I vaguely remember Dr. Conley's leaving Stanford but what I do really remember is the problem the U. had with using grant money for things like a fancy sailboat for the president of the U. I was working at NIH and most of their science/medical grants came from NIH. Conley was right about things getting better with more women in medicine. My daughter's fellow med school students were encouraged to report any harassment/abuse of any kind but there was still at least one male doctor who all the women knew about to avoid if they could.

[Marsha · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dr. Frances K. Conley, M.D. writes about sexual harassment that she experienced and other students and physicians experienced at Stanford University Medical facility in California. She quit her tenured job as a neurosurgeon because of the hostile environment. She covers an important topic about harassment in the work place, which I feel can be found in all work places, not just huge institutions, as I have personally experienced it in all forms myself. It is a long haul, but it will be an issue that will need to be continued to be addressed. I liked this book and found it very intriguing, but not surprising that even professions can be harassed and not be taken seriously on their job.

[Corby · Rating 4 out of 5]

Uh hunh. The stories that people can tell... It was almost painful for me to read the whole thing through knowing that yet another decade and a half has passed and, by and large, the glass ceiling is still reasonably intact in the academic medical community, for a variety of reasons. Thankfully, overtly sexist behavior is harder to find these days -- or perhaps it has started to retire.

[Stephanie Cianci · Rating 4 out of 5]

For anyone interested in Medicine, or in working as a female in a male driven environment, this book is an incredible read. I picked it out of a pile because I liked the title, and it ended up being awesome. If you are interested in Stanford University or hospital as well, there will be a lot of familiar places. I always love reading about empowered women, and this one did not let down.

[Kathleen]

Really quite a shocking book, even to those of us who grew up knowing the dirt on how Stanford treats women as a whole. Quite a fast read, too, which I appreciate as a reluctant reader of non-fiction popular tracts.

[Maria · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a great book which brings insight to how women are valued or more accurately devalued in medicine as practitioners, patients and research subjects. Going to the doctor will never be the same after you read this.

[Candis Stern · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not surprising and interesting. Also dated now since it was written in 1998. Academic medicine is a tough field for women. I hope there has been a lot of progress since 1998. It was a good read, well written, just dated.

[Corynn · Rating 3 out of 5]

An interesting read for would-be academics. I was dismayed at the recent dates given to most of the events depicted in the book.

[Becky · Rating 4 out of 5]

20年前的書，許多段落讀來還是既視感十足，走了那麼久，改變了那麼多，有些事卻好似永遠無法撼動。

[Michelle Nguyen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a very enlightening read. You don't truly know what's going on behind the hospital doors as a patient. Women go through such a discrimination by their respective colleagues, it is quite sad. This book definitely brought a new perspective on me.