The hell with these stars, how do I do this? 2 star chapters, 12 star chapters. This novel is a roller coaster that almost stops at the lowest, slowest moments of telling and then takes off again, shrieking into the starry night, higher and higher, leaving you rattled, mesmerized, breathless.
It’s really hard to write fiction about any contemporary music scene, to get the voice and the beat and the lift that live music can bring like nothing else. To write a novel full of the metal scene in the 80s, and make the reader actually feel it? I was doubtful, but I love John Wray - and so, I dug in. And he can do it, he can bring you there.
I loved the opening chapters, the sweet and the rank, the wry humor of high school seniors on the edge of everything, teetering there, falling back on each other. The relationship between Kip and Leslie is a fine, rare portrayal of a deeply felt connection between two lost teenagers. Leslie is a black gay kid whose adoption by a dotty but loving wealthy white couple has done almost nothing to keep him from spiraling downwards; Kip, a white, straight kid born to poverty and violence, abused and neglected, with no one to count on but himself. They connect through a mutual devotion to 80s metal, and quickly recognize the Perennial Outsider in each other. Enter Kira, the third musketeer, becoming a devoted friend and love interest. She never comes quite as vividly into view, though I feel like I knew this girl, years ago, all hard angles, quick smiles, her need to move into the shadows.
And metal, screaming heavy 80s metal through all of it - oh, someone is going to have a blast putting together the soundtrack for this story, if it's adapted as I hope it will be.
Wray knows his stuff, sometimes needs to show us too much of it; after devouring the first 5 chapters, my heart sunk with the opening of chapter 6 and it’s sudden change of stance; away from the intensity of emotion the book takes off with, we’re suddenly presented with a rather flat presentation of the audience at an 80s Anthrax show. Such an odd and sudden u-turn. There’s so much listing. Lists of band names, metal zines, lists of looks and outfits in various music scenes. An editor should have gently mentioned that not all of the author’s research or pre novel obsession needed to be included …then weirdly, I started to like the lists.
Time shifts, the setting changes. Florida. California. Europe. Three young people with no ties to the world but each other and the music that runs through each of them. As they move - not entirely forward - and leave their teens behind, there are moments of possibility, at least for Kip, but mostly, the world they’re in gets darker. In the California chapters, I somehow kept imagining an oil can tipped over, leaking foul gasoline down an empty highway.
There are scenes in Wolves that cut like a switchblade. Young lovers with a shared childhood history of little but abuse and pain, finding in each other a hidden place to relive and recreate the anguish foisted upon them when they couldn’t fight back. The despairing need for violent sex, the opposite of whatever “making love” might be, that act for other people; people nothing like them.
After Kip tries to kill that energy, he realizes, “He couldn’t make things real for her. He could only make things dead.” Later, in a European city neither of them knew or had even imagined, everything has shifted, they are lost tourists. “The entire city struck Kip as a monument to his lack of education.” So, yes, it’s bleak, but I was still in transit with them, still somehow hoping - but then. The last quarter of Gone to the Wolves makes everything that came before it, even the low points of drug addiction and toxic love, look like a sunny holiday.
We land inside a whirling nightmare of the late 80s-early 90s satanic cult that swept small pockets of the Norwegian metal scene. Silence, ice, dread and ultimately horror overwhelm the music that sometimes slid, sometimes raged through the previous chapters.
In my notes I found that I wrote:
This segment is:
Too long
Hypnotic
Boring
Terrifying.
Yet,yet, yet. Perhaps I haven’t made it clear: I loved Gone to the Wolves. I’ll return to it. Wray remembers things I also remember, or he makes me believe that he does. Some of it is very, very hard going. But oh, that ending. Dangling sweetness that we leave hanging in the air, believing, hoping, that it might finally arrive for these three Misfits who found sanctuary in each other.