The Teenage Textbook, or, The Melting of the Ice Cream Girl

by Adrian Tan

This book is for teenagers from 13 to 83.

It is a story about love, lust and lechery, all happening in the pressing space of six-and-a-half weeks (but as this is a family book, we shall not say where or how it's pressing).

Lee Mui Ee is the Ice Cream Girl. Tom D'Cruz, the Dashing Athletic Hero. Yeo Chung Kai is Mr Outstandingly Average while Sissy Song and Loo Kok Sean are the Princess of PJC and the Aspiring College Cassanova respectively.

Who will melt the Ice Cream Girl?
Who or what will sort out this mess? Will it be
1. The Teenage Textbook?
2. Dr E. Sopramaniam, MA (East Anglia), PhD (Calcutta)?
3. Irene Pates, Dear Adam, Paik Choo's Problem Page, the editors of Female Magazine and Mills & Boon?
4. Who cares!?

The answers to these and many other earth-(or should we say), milk-shaking problems, are here, as the Ice Cream Girl decides to make a clean breast of it.

"I've Passed Teenhood."

Genres: Fiction, Young Adult, Romance, Childrens, Teen

First published September 4, 1988

About the author

Adrian Tan Gim Hai was a Singaporean lawyer and author.

Reviews

[Weiqing]

Recommended and borrowed by J. He warns of cheese beforehand, but that it has its good moments. That's pretty much the most accurate summary I can come up with. It's quintessentially Singaporean - the best parts of it. We thrive in the cheesy, the nostalgic, toe-ing the line of tacky (stay within it and we're safe). Teenage Textbook is your JC puppy love condensed into a slim one-sitting novel. The style is tongue-in-cheek, stripped of its pretension. Think of it as an exceptionally compelling series of Dad Jokes. The gems are aplenty, humour is consistent throughout the novel (approx. 4 per page if you're curious).

Beyond the funnies, this is all in all well-written. A good dose of meta, helmed in smoothly because of how the book is structured. Which brings me to how it's structured: interspersed with excerpts of the actual Teenage Textbook. I have to applaud Adrian Tan for his effort: the Textbook bits were unnecessary but thoroughly enjoyable breaks. Just bask in Tan's wit and sometimes attempt-wit, also the retrospectively hilarious 1980s-ish fashion/dating advice.

The nostalgia. I'd think a novel so heavily creamed with slapstick (plus of course written > 2 decades ago) wouldn't be very relatable to me, but nope. Still evoked that hazy, pleasant, carefree JC daydreams. I was especially touched by the references to curry puffs, which for some reason seems to resonate with all Singaporeans with fond memories in school canteens. Anyway.

Teenage Textbook is perfect for anyone who's greedy for several elements at once 1) light-heartedness, 2) indulgent feel-good, 3) clever narrative, 4) something to prepare you for that nostalgic SG50 trip. In fact yes, I think TT is just right for 2015. I wish more local writers would be fearless enough to try something other than hipster/wispy, or rid of the compulsion for explicit, literary ~depth. Sometimes all we need is some good, conscious writing rooted in everyday life. And everyday life is more of a comedy than deep rumination tbh.

[Jericho Eames · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved it. It was hilarious and so lighthearted. It's honestly like a Singaporean take on 500 days of Summer and I did like that movie quite a bit. 10/10 would recommend for a good laugh and a bittersweet teen romance.

[PMP · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book had a hey-day in the late 1980s-early 1990s, bringing up a possible generation of Singaporean youths. The school principal was called Elvis, and the two teenagers in love kept saying "QED - Quite Easily Done". I interviewed the author extensively for my Secondary Three GEP project, thinking at the time you could learn how to write by asking another person. Thinking also that the author of _The Teenage Textbook_ had to be the embodiment of literary inspiration. He said that he plotted everything out on a piece of mahjong paper before he wrote the story. I bought a mini tape recorder just for our interview.

[WYKW · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read The Teenage Textbook when I was in Junior College and I totally identified with it. From next year onwards, JCs will only have one intake a year, instead of once in January and once in March. Therefore The Teenage Textbook and Workbook will henceforth become a reference point of the divided experience. An excellent read for secondary school students and JC students, or any adult who wants to reminiscence their bashful teenage years.

[Wisteria · Rating 3 out of 5]

Am crossing over to realm of the young adult (19 going on 20), but this book certainly brought back lots of nostalgia and memories from my JC days. This was published way back in 1988, but reading this makes me realise not much has changed since then (like the pranks students pull/the lingo students adopt/perspectives that students hold) hehe. Read it in one sitting, so glad my school library had it!

[Dayna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Second read. It's just as sweet and funny. Very homey feels. Just silly and all round light read close to home. I do appreciate his work more now that I know his intended messages and themes thanks to the bookclub I attended today, starring him. My mum read this as a teen too. It's trippy how literature flows through generations.

[Sadie-Jane Huff · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5☆

Yes it took me forever until I finally picked up this book at the library.

It gave me all kinds of nostalgic feels as I felt like I went back to school (I went to convent school btw - so stereotype I know).

Read this in one sitting and I laughed at the cheesiness and clichés but that is what makes this a classic, right?

[Leann Low · Rating 5 out of 5]

A must read for all teenagers during the late 80s and beginning of 90s. I was in secondary school then. Still keeping the Textbook and Workbook till now but if I were to pass to my daughter to read, she may not be able to relate to it as it was 3 decades ago. No mobile, no internet then.

[leia · Rating 5 out of 5]

this book. is my comfort book. as much as i like indepth reviews about susbtance and style and my enjoyment, i cant do that for this book because i see no flaws with it. this is my favourite book ever published and it is funny nd heartwarming and sweet and full of wordplay and also i love her

[Desiree Koh · Rating 4 out of 5]

At that time, it was a "cannot-put-down."

[Gin · Rating 4 out of 5]

These are less my thoughts about the book than what feelings it invoked in me. Nostalgia was one, as the premise of the story was set in a time that I could identify with, having gone to JC in 1998. Reading it was like a trip down memory lane, even though this was actually the first time I read it. I have watched the movie more times than I can remember though. I’m not sure whether the teens of today can identify but for those who gone through JC in the 80s and 90s, the book will transport you back to when life was simpler, where our concerns were much more objectively mundane yet subjectively life-changing.

The book is thus firmly culturally within the milieu of 1980s and 1990s Singapore, and those from other lands, or even younger Singaporeans may not be able to understand it (the idea of the first three months, for instance). But for us who did, it’s a portal to a time of our lives which we may look back with much fondness, and which we probably wish we could return to.

[Joey · Rating 2 out of 5]

Personally I'd classify this as a contemporary chick-lit for the 80s-90s era. I could see how this would be a fittingly hilarious punny book, littered with jokes of relevance to the teens for its time. Not that the humour was lost on me, for I think I still traverse between the lines of the different millennia to still be able to understand them. Still, this novel oozes of cheese with the "guidebook" within a novel and the ever-so-predictable Mediacorp - ah, sorry, SBC - plot. Don't take yourself too seriously, and you should be able to finish this lighthearted read in an afternoon hahaha.

Picked this up because the Mediacorp modern adaptation kept popping up - probably would still check the series + the 1998 movie out, because I'm that kind of sucker always looking for Singaporean branded content hahahaha.

[PATRICK · Rating 4 out of 5]

i'm filipino and i did quite still relate to it. as a reader from his 20s living in the u.s., i can't help but compare how YA books are here culturally. YA books in the u.s. don't have this southeast asian "kilig" that this chic-lit possess. this naivete, this innocence, this slow melting of ice cream girl, this coming of age possess a certain energy that i have found before in reading filipino books (see Rene O Villanueva's books (Seniors' Ball)) anyway, it was a cute read. if i ever go to singapore again, hopefully when i come back to manila, if i'm going to roam around southeast asia too, i'm gonna head to the bookstore first thing and get the sequel!

[Sunny · Rating 4 out of 5]

this book is one of many pieces of media I consumed as a teenager that have made me insufferable for better and for worse. have so deeply ingrained elements of the humour into my own I can barely identify where in the book it even came from. the dialogue has been written into my personality. funny, light-hearted story of finding love and yourself--while also trying not to disappoint your parents--while at university (raise your hand if you're surprised that I relate). I re-read this once a year to humble myself to my weird kid roots.

[Kes · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious book about JC1 (17 year olds) falling in love.

Mui Ee and Chung Kai enter their first year in Junior College. They deal with falling in love, with the help of The Teenage Textbook.

It’s a funny and very Singaporean book. I liked the meta nature - the narrator casually pokes fun at being Singaporean. There are excerpts from the Teenage Textbook which are simply hilarious, like;

Love is FRAIL
F - Friendship (25%)
R - Romance (25%)
A - Admiration (15%)
I - Infatuation (15%)
L - Lust (20%)

And various Multiple Choice Questions

Entertained by how pseudo scientific it is.

[Eunice Ying Ci · Rating 3 out of 5]

A funny book that would have made for a nice alternative to all the other teenager fiction I was reading as a kid. I wonder if there is an earlier Singaporean Teenage Fiction version of this - maybe something in the late 1970s to early 1980s. Because that would be set during my mother’s youth. Perhaps something that really distinguishes this from American Teenage Fiction is the kind of highly pragmatic, ideal, state-approved, family-friendly teen romance that the book celebrates.

[Lohweiqi · Rating 5 out of 5]

Light-hearted, witty comic relief I didn't know I needed. Singaporean quirks were aptly captured and tastefully done. Amazing how something from 1988 manages to be relevant and relatable today, while capturing vividly the flairs of the times.

Overall, I am impressed. It managed to make such a straightforward (and may I say, somewhat predictable) plotline palatable and enjoyable. Would love to have a copy of this on my home bookshelf. Looking forward to reading the sequel!

[Li Sian · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was inspired to reread TTT by this incredible exegesis of it on prose.sg, and... was largely disappointed by how flimsy it was, really. Stock characters can be fun, esp in a comic novel, but when that's all they are... this novel felt simultaneously too short and too long.

[A.g. · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the very few books I have read more than once. Light and funny Singappre teenage romance novel.

[Charfeb · Rating 5 out of 5]

I wish I discovered this book earlier!

[haanzie · Rating 5 out of 5]

MY 4EVER COMFORT BOOK <3

[thaesusan · Rating 4 out of 5]

kinda cheesy but liked it more than i expected lol

[Luke Ethan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wonderful teenage love story in setting of Singapore 80s

[sierra · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.75⭐️

loved the plot, but some parts fell flat for me🙁

[Wan Ling]

rec by: ricky p

[Chua · Rating 5 out of 5]

Super cheesy. But super sweet as well.

[mushyreading · Rating 4 out of 5]

Re-reading this after a long while brings back nostalgia feels. The 1980s is not my teenage era but there's sufficient relatable references to make me feel the years gone by.

[Darby · Rating 4 out of 5]

Had fun reading this book.

[Althea · Rating 4 out of 5]

Funny but you’d have to either be singaporean or know the culture very well for it to be. Rip Adrian Tan, you’re a legend

[En · Rating 4 out of 5]

So Singaporean but it’s exactly this that makes it charming