Another Kindle read to soften the books piling up and squeezing me tighter in my tiny unit..
I’m 54, divorced father of two. Was in the army and had a very short tour of duty in Iraq as a medic. Grew up in a fatherless home. My dad took his own life when I was ten. Mother married a bully and an intimidating man who from age 11-18 bashed the shit out of me both physically and more often mentally. So I’ve been trying to get my shit together ever since. Booze, pills, psychologists, psychiatrists, poor choices, poor decisions and failure to complete or utilise the knowledge of a multitude of self help books. I’ve failed at every attempt to maintain long term significant self improvement. Booze being the winner multiple times and an ever deeper longing to keep drinking. You though should read this book, I must admit I didn’t find Ollie a very likeable person (not that it matters), still his story of his wins, losses and failures and then finally upon finding a meaning and substantial insight by the program where he took Ayahuasca hammered home truth in experience. So will I use this book to try once more to get off my fat lazy arse and improve my outlook? Probably not. I want to. I would like to give it a go. I’m very tired of myself and the disappointment, pain and hurt I have caused others. I am actually sick of the dread, anxiety, uselessness and meaninglessness that I alone have accepted as my lot and importantly what I alone created. Battle Ready is well written, it’s an enjoyable experience and the ideas and prompts to live a good life are worthy. I can see the logic as well as the design behind the madness. So I’m not entirely sold on my readiness to climb out of my self made hole (the book itself is a great read, interesting and I do think the prompts will work if the individual’s mindset is ready to change). How to get ready? That I don’t know. Good book though. I recommend you read it. I guess adapting the philosophy successfully depends on how far down and deep you are in your own self made misery and futility. I want to but unsure...