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Earth Fathers #1

Earth Fathers Are Weird

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Captain Maxwell Davis and his entire unit scrambled to engage alien ships over Iowa. The aliens snatched him out of his destroyed jet before they continued on their interplanetary hot pursuit. Then they informed Max that Earth was too far outside regular shipping lanes to return him to his planet.

So Max ends up in an alien spaceport looking for work. To afford a ticket home he can either spend three hundred years working with linguists to improve the computer's questionable ability to translate English or he can take a job as a nanny for an unpopular alien.  That way he can afford the ticket in four years.  The problem is that the computer may have mistranslated the word "nanny" and there might be a reason an alien is willing to pay such a high fee.

221 pages, Kindle Edition

First published April 13, 2019

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2394 people want to read

About the author

Lyn Gala

47 books1,166 followers
Lynsey "Lyn" Gala started writing in the back of her science notebook in third grade and hasn’t stopped since. Westerns starring men with shady pasts gave way to science fiction with questionable protagonists which eventually gave in to any story with a morally ambiguous character. Even the purest heroes have pain and loss and darkness in their hearts, and that’s where she likes to find her stories. Her characters seek to better themselves and find the happy ending (or happier anyway), but it’s writing the struggle that inspires her muse. When she isn’t writing, Lyn Gala teaches in New Mexico.

She first cut her teeth on fanfic: gen, slash, het, and femslash. She prefers to focus on plot: mysteries and monsters and disasters, oh my, but sex can and does happen. Some of her stories focus on power exchange, bondage or bdsm. In her worlds, tops and bottoms are all mature, consenting adults. In fact, stories where they aren't squick her badly, so don't expect to find abuse stories in her journal.

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 491 reviews
Profile Image for Shin Mon Thway.
663 reviews1,702 followers
May 13, 2020
I loved this book when I read it last year and I love it even more when I listen this as an audio when this came out. If you’ve been reading my reviews for a while, you know I’m a diehard Lyn Gala fan and John Solo is one of my all time favorite narrators. So when this baby came out between the collaboration of my two favorite artists, let’s just say, this bookworm can die happy and contented now. I know I’m biased there but I am NOT exaggerating! The narration and performance of this book is so good that it’s simply superb! John’s narration makes me laugh out loud at times and he made the impossible .. I thought I couldn’t love this book more but I was wrong! I love it even better with John’s stellar performance. I couldn’t recommend it enough! 10 out of 10 stars for me! Waiting very VERY eagerly for the next book in the series! 😍



Original review: Edited Version

OMG!!! 😱 How much I loved this novel!!! 😍 It was just soooooooooooo adorable! 💜 In case you don’t know, I’m a HUGE, Lyn Gala fan. I think her Claiming series is and always will be my all time favorite love story between an alien and a human. 👏 So imagine my delight when I found out we are getting another romance between an alien and a human from her. But this time, it’s going to be even better because we are getting lots of delicious tentacles! 😏 Yum! 😋 So I’ve been on the edge of my seat squirming nervously waiting for the release of this book and now I’m ecstatic to finally get the copy of this book in my hands. *grabby hands* 🙌😁 And as I expected, Lyn Gala exceeded my expectations and delivered much more. 😌


So to say Max was at the wrong place at the wrong time couldn’t be more wrong. 😁 Because he actually was at the right place but a slight mistiming in the time factor resulted Max being rescued/kidnapped/hauled by the intergalactic peace enforcers. Now Max found himself being dumped on a busy space port with just a conciliatory pat from the enforcer with no money, no friends and zero understanding of the local language. 😂 Luckily, he met with an alien social worker who was willing to help him. So Max now has a job, a job which will help him return home, to work as a nanny to alien children. ☺️ But what Max didn’t realize was that another unfortunate misunderstanding of the stupid translator has landed him a job not as a nanny but as a surrogate of this many tentacles alien. 😂 But perhaps, Max does have a tentacle fetish that he didn’t even realize himself when he was on earth! 😉


Max was, to say the least, a perfect hero. ❤️ A man who’s willing to do everything and anything to protect those who he loves and cherish, loyal, faithful, loving, kind and courageous. At the same time he’s adorably quirky and fun with a wicked sense of humor. 😁 He doesn’t give up even when the situation seems hopeless and fruitless and he always manages to manage to get the best results out of worst situations. I also adored Rick, Rick the asymmetric tentacled alien with goofy attitude, enormous kindness, and unconditional love towards his cute adorable offsprings and Max. 😍 Physically, Max and Rick couldn’t be more different but internally, they click! ☺️💜 And oh, how they love to entangle their tentacles! 😁 *wink wink* 😉 I’ll be honest, I went into this story kinda expecting a more sci-fi focused story with an enormous world building. In turn, I got a very heart-warming, sweet, tender, swoon-worthy and slow-burn romance between Rick and Max. 🥰 I love that it took a long time for both of them to realize that they harbor feelings for each other. The UST between these two was amazing. 👏 And my, was that smut hot?!?! 😱 It was just really erotic and titillating! 🔥 Smoking hot! 🔥 Although, this story is not heavy in smut, Lyn Gala was a master at making every love scene count! So yum! 😋 And I really didn’t expect that plot twist in the middle, I cried and gasped several times in those chapters because I really had no idea how everything will turn out from that experience. 😭 But I really shouldn’t have worried because I knew Lyn wouldn’t be that cruel to us readers. 😌 And oh my god, those offspring are beyond cute!!!!!! 😍 Beware readers!!! You are in for onehelluva “awwwwwwwwwww” moments for those little tentacle monsters. 🥰 I’m not going to say how many because I don’t wanna ruin the surprise but Xander definitely is my favorite child. 💙 And when Max finally realized he was already home with his beloved family, (I will admit rather embarrassingly 😁) I shed a few happy tears. 😅 I really couldn’t ask more from this story except for more of these two in the future. *Pretty please* 🙏🙏🙏 And preferably, I’d love to get at least a short story of Rick’s POV because I know it’s going to be so adorably quirky and asymmetric. Loved, loved, loved it! 😍 And I can’t recommend this book enough for those who are looking for unique and swoon-worthy romances with lots of delicious, sexy tentacles! 😉



5 Family is not of blood but of your choosing stars
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️




Audio rating

Story - 5 stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Narration - 5 stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Performance - 5 stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Overall - 5 stars ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️



Favorite excerpts from the story: 💜


“Query. Health. Human.” “Oh, I’m fucking great,” Max said. “Thank you for asking. You’re much more polite than the typical tentacle monster, although honestly I don’t have experience with the non-fictional kind.” Max knew Rick couldn’t understand more than a word or two of that, but he didn’t care. He didn’t care about much right now. Rick had reduced Max’s thoughts to “tentacles good.”

Sarcasm was so much more effective when the other person understood English.

As soon as the pain was over, Max definitely would tie one of Rick’s tentacles into a knot. He just needed to figure out which tentacle had done the impregnating so he could damage the one that would hurt the most.

“Confirmation. You said humans enjoy sex.” “Yes,” Max said, feeling a little like he was walking in a minefield. “Clarify. Query. Why would you avoid sex if you enjoy it and I meet the prerequisite conditions?”

“I gave birth to you. You grew in my body. That makes me your father. It makes me responsible for seeing that you are safe and happy. I will kill every bastard on this ship before I will let them touch you. But I can't do something that puts you in danger. I need you safe.”

Humans will kill for offspring.” The invader made a show out of looking at James before he again studied Max. “Offspring not human.” Max felt his cold pragmatism give way to hot fury. “I am their father! I am their surrogate father. They grew in me. I’ve taught them. I’ve cared for them. They are mine. And I will kill for them.”

“However, sometimes sex involves how bodies fit together and the emotions that people feel for one another. That sex becomes complicated, and turning on the reproductive system too quickly can be a problem.”

“I am symmetrical, at least externally.” “But internally asymmetrical. Rick rested a tentacle on his lower stomach. “Internally, Max is random and unpredictable.” Max narrowed his eyes. “Are you saying you find my intestines attractive?” Of all the pickup lines. Max had gotten in his life, and he had gotten a lot, that was the oddest. “Yes.” “You’re the weird one.”

“I sought offspring because I hoped for slower waters. I could not hope to find a pair bond. Query. Would you pair bond?” Max’s brain had a full meltdown. “What?” “To pair bond is to share stagnant waters and enjoy the condition of boring with an individual you find pleasing enough to seek repetitious experiences.” Max blinked and tried to restart his brain. “That is the strangest definition of marriage I have ever heard,”

“I like Max's stagnant water,” Rick said so slowly that the translation computer had to pause between words. “I like Max's stories. I like Max keeping offspring safe. I like Max keeping me safe. I like Max happy and making strange mouth noises.”

“I am fond of your intestines. They are beautifully asymmetrical.” Max laughed and held his hand out, fingers spread, and Rick coiled his smallest tentacle around his fingers. Despite all their differences, they were pretty damn compatible.

“Observation. We have much different internal structures. You are rare boned-tentacle species. Of contrast, we are sexually compatible.” “Yes, we are,” Max said with a smile. He grabbed his shirt from the floor. “I enjoyed that a lot.” Rick gave a little full-body shimmy.

Query. Would you dislike me if I had an even number of tentacles?” “Of course not.” Max hadn’t ever counted the tentacles. “Logical.” Rick gave a little bounce. Max shook his head. Aliens. So weird.










Disclaimer: An ARC of this book was provided by the author for an honest and unbiased review.
Profile Image for Heather K (dentist in my spare time).
4,109 reviews6,694 followers
November 16, 2024
**2024 Audiobook re-read- I LOVE IT MORE THAN EVER. Added to my all-time favorites list**



There is no way to describe my love for this book without sounding like a kinky freak, but who am I kidding, I *AM* a kinky freak!

Earth Fathers Are Weird has been on my wishlist forever, but I finally got around to getting it in audio. I have mixed feelings about John Solo's narrations sometimes, but he absolutely nailed the audio. Truly incredible narrating, and I highly recommend getting this book in audiobook format.

Is this book M/M romance?? It's more like M/? romance, if I'm being honest. Rick isn't a guy, not in any traditional or non-traditional sense, but Max sees him as a man so ???. In fact, gender doesn't matter much with this book, but let's just say that Rick and Max turn out to be VERY compatible *wink, wink*

Though it sounds terrible when I type it out, I sort of loved the language barrier and tricked into surrogacy plotline (YES I KNOW THAT SOUNDS PROBLEMATIC). The set-up was interesting and really unique for me, and I just adored how everything played out. There is actually a lot of love and sweetness there, and I really dug how Max was able to look past Rick's physical appearance and get to know him for the person (??) that he is. Max is fierce when he is defending those he loves, and I adored that.

And the sex.... ASHJFLSDJFLJS FLSJ. Let's just say, tentacles, baby!! Those are some talented appendages. I couldn't get enough.

In short, this is an oddball story that won't be in line with most readers' tastes. But for me.... bring on the alien romances!!

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Profile Image for * A Reader Obsessed *.
2,695 reviews576 followers
January 4, 2020
3.5 Impressed Hearts

Admittedly, Gala’s Claimings series is a top favorite. It’s smart, unique, definitely unlike anything I had read before, and the romance to it - while unconventional - was really really swoony. I cannot not compare this to it, and Claimings still takes top billing.

Full disclosure. This has many things that might not catch your fancy or maybe it will.

First and foremost are the tentacles - sooooo many tentacles.
There’s also mpreg - graphic details about implantation and delivery.
Throw in quasi dubious consent in regards to the aforementioned impregnating.
Don’t forget an alien MC that is not even humanoid - that book cover pretty much says it all.

This story is about Max and Rick and how they deal with a massive inability to mutually understand one another and the obvious snafu that results because of it. Slowly though, they learn more and more, they develop some pretty tight bonds, and ultimately, they make a family - and what an adorable family it is!! It was also about the evolution of Max’s situation and thus, his own personal expectations in finding love and acceptance and camaraderie and intimacy in the unlikeliest places, in the unlikeliest “person”.

Though this started out a bit rough, though this made me squirm due to all the tentacles and the stark physical differences between the two MC’s, it was still a rewarding story. For tentacle enthusiasts, this still had the smexy. This surprisingly had a great deal of suspense and action and thrill to it as well. At its center though, is all heart.

Overall, this delivered a story that was also smart, thought provoking, and introspective - mainly about us humans and our complex nature and where we fit in the universe. That’s where this shines and impresses, just like it did with Claimings and thus, I wouldn’t say no should Gala choose to give us more.

Thank you to the author/publisher for a copy in exchange for a honest review

Profile Image for Eugenia.
1,903 reviews319 followers
January 18, 2021
AUDIOBOOK relisten: Jan 2021 ❤️🦑🐙❤️ Still delightful, sweet & FUN! Highly recommended in either format—a great “tentacle sex” intro book for those curious! But more than anything, this book is about kindness, acceptance & love 👏❤️😉

**AUDIOBOOK: May 2020 ❤️❤️❤️ I LOVED IT SO HARD!!! What a fabulous performance by the incomparable John Solo—can he do space or can he do space?!

How happy was I to get to listen to this story on audiobook...I NEED a FOLLOW-UP because Max and Rick & the offspring are simply precious!

I loved the ebook and now THIS! I already want to relisten to it. ❤️🌈🙌

Original ebook review: March 2019

You had me at tentacles, Lyn Gala. I absolutely DEVOURED this! 4.5 Squiggly Stars!!!

Imagine: alien ships come zipping around our modern day planet. Our fighter jets fly off to save the planet from alien invaders. One mouthy pilot goes for a Hail Mary and gets captured.

Welcome to a spaceport not even George Lucas could have imagined! Say hello to tentacles of all flavors and sizes!

So what happens to our stranded pilot? He needs cash to get home so he takes a job as a “nanny” for an alien from a disliked species. After his initial medical exam, which has an unexpected happy ending, said pilot is left to his own devices.

Where are the kids? He must wait to meet them. In the meantime he spends his days working on translations, running around the ship, swimming, and hanging out with Rick, our asymmetrical tentacled alien with a smattering of eyes all around his head.

Being the smart, deductive reader that you are, you can guess why our smarmy pilot has yet to meet the kids he is supposed to nanny.

Imagine Hunk Solo’s surprise when he figures it out!

There it is, all laid out for you. And while that bit of exposition was fun, it’s nothing to what comes next!!! Wow!!

You simply MUST READ THIS!!!! HEA to the moon and beyond!!

I am closing with: TENTACLED BABIES ARE THE CUTEST THING EVER!!!!!

***I received a copy of this book from the author in exchange for a fair and honest review**
Profile Image for ~✡~Dαni(ela) ♥ ♂♂ love & semi-colons~✡~.
3,583 reviews1,122 followers
May 10, 2019
Earth Fathers Are Weird is ... well, weird.

To be fair, I knew what I was getting into going in: tentacles, non-human-looking alien, mpreg. While I'm not a huge fan of mpreg, I don't hate it either. And Lyn Gala writes such good aliens. Her Claimings series is brilliant, in large part because the emotional connection between Ondry and Liam is all consuming and the world building second to none.

That was not the case with Earth Fathers Are Weird. We're thrown into the middle of the story with little to no explanation of what exactly is going on. Earth seems to be in the middle of a war with alien aircrafts. Max is a captain and gets captured/rescued by one of such aircrafts. He's told he can hire a spaceship to take him back to earth, but it's expensive, so a kind alien social worker helps him find employment as a "nanny."

The translation machines are rusty, however, and it turns out "nanny" actually means "surrogate." Ooops.

It takes Max a while to realize he's pregnant with Rick's offspring. Rick and Max get better at communicating. There's some humor in the things lost in translation.

If you're into tentacle porn, this book will prove a treat. Rick has many, MANY tentacles, all of which do delicious things to Max's body.

I didn't find this particularly hot. It wasn't off-putting by any means, but not titillating either.

The ending is kind of wishy-washy, with Max doubting that Rick really wants to stay "stagnant" with him. It's not particularly romantic, at least in the human sense.

The baby aliens are pretty damn cute though, and the story is enjoyable in its own way. I'm going with 3 stars, because Gala's writing is excellent, and the book is anything if not original.
Profile Image for Gail Carriger.
Author 63 books15.4k followers
April 23, 2019
Lyn Gala’s sci-fi romance Earth Father’s Are Weird made me ridiculously happy. It’s so charming. Human military dude accidentally becomes surrogate for tentacle alien children. All the feels. Found family, adorable squidies. Gah. So cute. I LOVE this author’s Claiming’s series, so I bought this one without bothering to read the blurb or sample. I REGRET NOTHING.
Profile Image for Kaje Harper.
Author 91 books2,729 followers
November 24, 2019
This was a fun, well-crafted SciFi romance with a biologically-plausible take on MPreg and tentacles, and inter-species romance. Lyn Gala really has a talent for imaginative plausibility, showcased in this lighter story.

As two alien spaceships enter Earth's skies in a violent way, military pilot Max and his fellow fighter jets rise to meet them, trying to figure out what to attack. Then Max's plane is hit, and the next thing he knows, he's waking up onboard an alien spacecraft. To his confusion, no one seems to want anything from him. He's been rescued, and far from being a prisoner or a meal, he's simply a passenger, along for the ride.

Max is turned loose on the next world, in a bustling city full of tentacled alien species, with no idea what he should do. He soon learns that he could buy passage back to Earth, but his world is a distant backwater and it's going to be very expensive to get back there. He needs a job.

The translation program to and from English is barely functioning. Max is from a technologically-backward planet, has few skills to offer, and no way to communicate the ones he does have. The social worker suggests he could work on improving the translation program, but that job pays so little he won't get home before he dies of old age.

Alternatively, the social worker suggests he might agree to care for the offspring of an alien of an unpopular "loud" species. The job pays surprisingly well, and Max figures he's resourceful and can handle being a nanny for alien kids. But with the translator still very rudimentary, it's hard to figure out what his role is supposed to be, or when he'll meet those kids. After a very thorough medical exam by his new boss "Rick," and a few weeks of confusion without ever seeing the children, a sudden cramp in his abdomen turns out to be something far more unexpected than gas. And "care for" turns out to be a really bad translation.

I liked Max. He was optimistic, intelligent, adaptable, determined, and willing to roll with a series of big punches. The alien "Rick" was an interesting character, a creature of honor, honest and sympathetic without being too human in his outlook. I loved that the MPreg was not slavery or rape or seduction but a badly-translated job offer. It fell within the bounds of biological plausibility with Max still being fully human. His empathy let him see the parasitic offspring growing inside him as creatures to be cherished, and that kept the angst level low.

There's some tentacle sex, but only a couple of times, appropriate to the plot, diffused and confused by Max's uncertainty of his role and Rick's. This is very much a story of discovery, of two intelligent minds slowly working past the barriers of terrible communication to find common goals, and of an extremely unusual kind of found family. The end was satisfying, (although I wouldn't mind following the tale of Max, Rick, and the triplets further if the author ever chose to give us another taste.) This one lands among my small list of favorite MPreg stories, and left me smiling.
Profile Image for Martin.
807 reviews601 followers
May 14, 2019
This was my random excursion into an alternative romance. Very, very alternative.

description

All I'm saying.

But I need to rant a bit about Max as a character. I didn't like him. At all.
And I just couldn't grasp his complete lack of fear of aliens and their tentacles...

2.5 stars!
Profile Image for Cadiva.
3,996 reviews437 followers
July 12, 2019
Well, that was absolutely brilliant. I had no idea what to expect really with this book, my first from Lyn, but when Shin asked if I was willing to review an ARC, I was intrigued.

I loved pretty much everything about this, it's funny, it's sexy, it's an exploration of just what actually defines love and how it's possible to fall for an asymmetrical tentacle creature without realising it.

The idea of Earth being off in some boring backwater of space that other sentient beings ignore because humans don't have multiple limbs or tentacles really tickled me.

Max's confusion at what happened to him following what he thought was an alien invasion but which turned out to be the equivalent of a police chase, was seriously funny.

Lyn Gala's a total genius though as she explores how Max begins to communicate and improve the 'Babelfish-like' translation program on the ship he lands himself on to work his passage back to Earth.

How do you define hurt or emotional heartbreak when it's a literal alien concept?!

Considering all the tentacles, there wasn't as much sexy times as I'd perhaps been expecting, but the relationship which develops between Max and the octopus-like owner of the ship, who he calls Rick, is totally believable and quite emotional.

And the offspring? Too cute for words :) This book was fab, so thanks Shin for putting it on my radar.

#ARC kindly received from the author in return for an honest and unbiased review.
Profile Image for Lily Mayne.
Author 26 books5,668 followers
August 14, 2021
I'm late to the game with this one! At first I thought I wouldn't get past just how inhuman Rick is, but he grew on me - he is a total sweetheart. Max is the best of humanity - super protective and tries his best not to let his emotions rule him but... they do :)

The offspring are ADORABLE.
Profile Image for Jackbees.
234 reviews23 followers
October 31, 2025
Regular lady to dirty old perv: an mm romance progression.

About 2 years ago I watched a funny sitcom on Netflix. It was called “Shitts Creek” and featured an endearing gay romance that hit me in the feelings.

Not long later my Netflix account gave me a thumbnail recommendation of a series called “Heartstopper” and I was totally drawn in by those 2 cute boys gazing happily/hopefully/curiously/longingly at each other, so clicked play. I adored this series more than anything else I have ever watched in my life. Ever. So of course I went straight onto my kindle app and read the matching webcomic and novella.

Sensing my enthusiasm the Kindle algorithm then lead me onto a popular MM novel. Aptly referred by my Goodreads friend Drew as “the gateway drug of the genre”. You may have heard of it. “Red White and Royal Blue”. And I was hooked. Hopelessly addicted.

This MM romance world is a vortex and I went willingly. Fast forward to November 2024 and here I am…….tentacle porn.

Actually, this was very sweet and only mildly erotic even though Max is a fucking tentacle whore. This story is mostly about connection despite language barriers (think the Colin Firth part of “Love Actually”) and about falling in love with and protecting your children even if they were unplanned and a bit freaky.
Profile Image for ⚣Michaelle⚣.
3,662 reviews233 followers
April 16, 2019
To dismiss this as simply TentaclePorn would mean missing out on a truly interesting love story. It's hard to build a romance between a human and a completely non-human alien (in looks, thought processes, etc.) and have it be believable. LG does it with style, wit, flare and action...plus a whole lot of heart.
Profile Image for Susan.
2,349 reviews457 followers
April 18, 2019
For the first 30% I actually thought about throwing in the towel. I wasn’t connecting to Max and I actually felt disconnected from the entire story. But when I suddenly figured out this was mpreg (I didn’t read the blurb) I was sucked into the story anyway.

I do have to say that the first part of this could have used some more introduction. I felt there were a lot of details missing and I was a bit lost. It was like Max needed to become an alien nanny as soon as possible, and let’s not care about the details of how he got there. But once I accepted that I was kind of okay with it.

Max is an air force pilot trying to kill off the alien enemy that suddenly invaded earth space. When he expects to be blown up, he awakes on an alien ship and they take him far away from earth.

Max is then dropped off on a space station and with the help of a translation computer program finds out he needs to work for 300 years to be able to afford the trip back to earth. Or he could work for 4 years as a nanny and earn the same kind of money. So Max decides to take the nanny job.

Max gets taken to a big tentacled alien, who looks a bit like a squid. Since the translator device can’t pronounce the alien’s name Max calls him Rick.

Rick takes Max aboard his ship and Max tries to figure out for how many children he will be caring.

Since Rick apparently wants to check if Max is healthy before meeting the offspring, Max allows Rick to give him a physical. Even if that physical is putting a tentacle up his butt. Max even ends up enjoying that a lot.

When several weeks have passed and Max still hasn’t met Rick’s children he starts to get a bit impatient. When Max finally insists on seeing this offspring Rick reluctantly takes him to the medical room. Rick tells Max that most people don’t want to see the offspring, which Max thinks is weird. But when Rick shows Max a hologram projection of Max’s intestines Max gets it. He’s not the nanny, he is a surrogate! 3 little aliens are growing inside his intestines!

As I said, the first 30% were not my favorite, but once Max found out he was pregnant, the story suddenly got more interesting.

I wasn’t sure about Rick as a love interest, but at the end I was completely sold. The kids were incredibly cute, and I really loved how the ended up making a family for themselves.

We even got some action where Max had to fight several aliens who meant them harm. That was awesome.

Overall I really enjoyed this despite its rocky start. I will definitely be reading this again.
Profile Image for Jordan Price.
Author 138 books2,130 followers
Read
September 24, 2020
I'm a big fan of SFR because at its core, the genre is about loving someone who's different from you, and learning and growing in the process. This is by far the freshest take on SFR I've read--in fact, I'm in awe that the author could make me care about a love interest who is so very "alien" and can only communicate in the most broken, stilted, flawed way. I am so invested in these guys! (I don't know if Rick is technically a guy, but you know what I mean.) Something I keep turning over in my mind was that while Max had preconceptions about Rick that were eventually shattered, the opposite was also true. I loved this story so much I'll need to crack it open and read it again right away.
Profile Image for Rina Pride.
362 reviews106 followers
April 6, 2024
3.5 Stars! Estou precisando de um check-up mental ( só leio coisa estranha) 😅 É uma história de abdução alien bem esquisita e fofa ao mesmo tempo.
Profile Image for annob [on hiatus].
574 reviews72 followers
April 13, 2020
Diving in to a Lyn Gala sci-fi story by default sets my expectations super high since I adore her Claimings series. This story had a quirky and wonderfully weird plot, but while the Claimings world made me feel warm, happy and safe, this world leaned more towards lonely and blue.

Max, a human fighter pilot, ends up on an alien planet by mistake. He needs to make money to pay for the trip back to Earth. Language barriers galore ensues as he takes up a job for an alien boss.

The story had sections I enjoyed a lot; were great! The sci-fi fan in me was happy to see the author clearly had put much though into making the physics of the world plausible. On the other hand the language difficulties .

For me this book wasn't the strong romance I hoped for, but an enjoyable story still—unexpectedly about finding a family, to have companions in life to make it a journey less lonely.
Profile Image for Trio.
3,615 reviews207 followers
April 30, 2019
No one can build a love story between a man and an alien, and have it tug on my heartstrings, quite like Lyn Gala. Her new novel, Earth Fathers Are Weird, is a tender and passionate romance, and it’s chock full of the creative extra-terrestrial stuff she does so well. Don’t even think of calling this tentacle porn (well, maybe just a little…).

When alien spaceships invade Earth’s airspace, Air Force captain Maxwell Davis is rescued from his doomed fighter jet and set down on a planet far from Earth. Hoping to earn enough money to return home he accepts a position as a nanny - a decision which changes his life in ways he could never have imagined.

His new employer, an octopus-like alien whom Max calls Rick, patiently guides Max through his adjustment. Happy to find a purpose, Max embraces his lot and plans to make the most of his new life.

Told from Max’s point-of-view, there are wonderful descriptions of the aliens he encounters, the technology he learns to use, and his interactions with Rick. Despite the language barrier, and that Max has no frame of reference for this species, these two start to bond. As he gains a deeper understanding of Rick’s actions and emotions, he’s pleased to see their connection is mutual.

Max is such an open and caring person, and so deserving of love, I’m thrilled he finds Rick. And it appears he’s found a kindred spirit. The way these guys look beyond their physical differences, and focus on what’s inside, is a testament to the depth of their relationship.

As her fans expect, Ms. Gala does a wonderful job with the science fictiony aspect of Earth Fathers Are Weird. Building a world filled with imaginative technology and unique life forms, she also lays the groundwork for a plot which will (hopefully) carry over to many more books to come. I would love to see where Max and Rick go from here.

Ms. Gala granted us an interview, to give it a look-see click here
Profile Image for Jewel.
1,940 reviews279 followers
Read
May 12, 2019
DNF 32%

I love this author's writing, and after her "Claimings" series I one-clicked this. Oops, my bad... I wasn't expecting mpreg...not sure why considering the title, but... I tried to continue, but it's just squiking me out. I'm not rating, because it's totally me and not the book.

If you like mpreg, or at least open to the idea of it, give it a shot. The writing is top notch and from other reviews of people that loved it, it's ridiculously cute. It's just not for me.
Profile Image for Eugenia.
1,903 reviews319 followers
May 18, 2020
**AUDIOBOOK: May 2020 ❤️❤️❤️ I LOVED IT SO HARD!!! What a fabulous performance by the incomparable John Solo—can he do space or can he do space?!

How happy was I to get to listen to this story on audiobook...I NEED a FOLLOW-UP because Max and Rick & the offspring are simply precious!

I loved the ebook and now THIS! I already want to relisten to it. ❤️🌈🙌

Original ebook review: March 2019

You had me at tentacles, Lyn Gala. I absolutely DEVOURED this! 4.5 Squiggly Stars!!!

Imagine: alien ships come zipping around our modern day planet. Our fighter jets fly off to save the planet from alien invaders. One mouthy pilot goes for a Hail Mary and gets captured.

Welcome to a spaceport not even George Lucas could have imagined! Say hello to tentacles of all flavors and sizes!

So what happens to our stranded pilot? He needs cash to get home so he takes a job as a “nanny” for an alien from a disliked species. After his initial medical exam, which has an unexpected happy ending, said pilot is left to his own devices.

Where are the kids? He must wait to meet them. In the meantime he spends his days working on translations, running around the ship, swimming, and hanging out with Rick, our asymmetrical tentacled alien with a smattering of eyes all around his head.

Being the smart, deductive reader that you are, you can guess why our smarmy pilot has yet to meet the kids he is supposed to nanny.

Imagine Hunk Solo’s surprise when he figures it out!

There it is, all laid out for you. And while that bit of exposition was fun, it’s nothing to what comes next!!! Wow!!

You simply MUST READ THIS!!!! HEA to the moon and beyond!!

I am closing with: TENTACLED BABIES ARE THE CUTEST THING EVER!!!!!

***I received a copy of this book from the author in exchange for a fair and honest review**
Profile Image for Joyfully Jay.
9,076 reviews517 followers
April 16, 2019
A Joyfully Jay review.

5 stars


Get ready because I am about to gush! Earth Fathers are Weird is my first Lyn Gala novel, but it will not be my last. I absolutely loved this sci-fi/mpreg/fantasy story. If Max and his humor and determination to make the best of a situation that would have sent any other human being off the deep end does not impress, then those darn alien babies, particularly Xander, will. This novel had a little bit of everything and, quite frankly, with so many genre plates spinning in the air, I was sure one was bound to fly out of control, but author Lyn Gala excels at weaving implausible and impossibly funny circumstances into a gratifying and entertaining novel.

Where to begin with what delighted me the most? Max. He was both a straight up Rambo type when it came to defending his own and a gentle giant where the tiny Xander was concerned. After birthing three alien babies, Zander being the weakest and the last one out, Max helped Rick ensure the tiny offspring survived. Not only did Max manage to take in stride his capture by aliens, but the idea of becoming a dad to a trio of alien babies didn’t even having him breaking stride.

Read Sammy’s review in its entirety here.

Profile Image for Elena.
968 reviews119 followers
November 16, 2021
Lyn Gala is once again great at imagining an alien species that feels relatable and human and realistically non-human at the same time, and she did once again an awesome job at setting up believable communication failures in an inter-species pair of MCs. Sadly, though, this time she didn’t reach the full potential she demonstrated with the Claimings series.

The beginning was a bit confusing and the transitions in general didn’t always run smoothly, with odd time jumps here and there that sometimes resulted in Max referring to feelings that the reader hadn’t seen him develop. This was a bit of a common occurrence throughout the book. Rick was wonderfully alien, but I got to learn important aspects of his characterization mostly through Max referring things he noticed off page, instead of being shown Rick’s actions and reactions that would’ve supported that characterization. As a result, I never fully connected with him, not like I did with Ondry in the Claimings series. The same happened with the “romance,” it was there but its development was a little superficial. Max and Rick were still awfully sweet and cute in their interactions, they reminded me a little of Liam and Ondry in the way they dealt with their differences in perceiving the world and relationships. (And okay, yes, the tentacles might’ve played a little part in it. A very small one. What can I say? I seem to have a soft spot for cuddling aliens with unusual appendages.)
Weirdly enough, I loved the part regarding the offsprings. Yes, this is mpreg in the worst of ways and I’d decided I wouldn’t read it as soon as I realized it had that element, but in the end the lure of a new Lyn Gala alien species won me over and I caved. I don’t regret it. Aside from the logistics of the gestation and birth (yes, it was gross, but not as much as I feared), the “kids” felt more like pets with high cognitive functions than babies, so I wasn’t put off by the parenting as I usually am.

Despite my issues with the writing, I became fond of this unusual family, so I’m rating a little higher than I would’ve done otherwise, and I’ll follow them into the next book.
Profile Image for Lilly [Hiatus due to School] .
939 reviews440 followers
November 7, 2022
The story starts with Max, a fighter pilot, getting kidnapped during an attack on earth by aliens. In order to pay for his return home, he unknowingly agrees to become a surrogate and carry the offsprings of Rick. Rick and Max try to communicate through a translator that often misses causing funny moments of miscommunication, but they gradually begin to understand one another better. Max starts to form an attachment to Rick and the babies inside him. Despite the situation being nothing short of a nightmare - being taken away, impregnated without his knowledge, and away from his family - he ends up becoming the children he births and Rick's fiercest protector. He comes to love them. Those three alien children stole my heart. They were so cute, and I loved their interactions with their fathers.

While there were not a lot of spicy moments, the moments that happen between Rick and Max are pretty sexy. I do not think I have ever read tentacle sex like this before.

Earth Fathers are Weird is a unique take on sci-fi/alien romance. It is not your traditional humanoid Alien x Human pairing. Rick is non-humanoid, closely resembling an octopus and then a human. This was new territory for me as the monster/alien romances I read the non-humans/monsters are somewhat humanoid or at least bipedal. If you are into tentacle sex, a unique alien/human romance, and cute little alien children, this is it. It may not be for everyone but I adored this story!
Profile Image for Briana.
180 reviews13 followers
December 24, 2020
Tentacles. All up in his business.
description
Weird, right?

Initially, I thought that this would be bizarre. After all, I’m not into tentacles, but I was intrigued nonetheless. This isn’t some alien story with a humanoid, there isn’t a lot of it, but there is some tentacle porn on the page. I wanted to know, what’s that going to be like?
description
And you know what? Oddly enough, I liked it.

“To pair bond is to share stagnant waters and enjoy the condition of boring with an individual you find pleasing enough to seek repetitious experiences.”-Rick

Weirdly romantic, and while I felt the budding romance between Max and Rick was a bit slow and overshadowed by the offsprings part in the story, it was still very sweet in a quirky way.
Profile Image for Jo * Smut-Dickted *.
2,038 reviews517 followers
April 22, 2019
Amazing. Realistic (that is to say no miraculous butt birthing without pain and explained well on the pregnancy front). I loved both characters - and they grew on me. The best way for a book to go. So fascinating - I want more!
1,302 reviews33 followers
March 25, 2019
I am on Gala’s Patreon, and have already read this. I enjoyed it very much. I hope she writes more about these people. I will be rereading it soon.
Profile Image for Rosabel.
723 reviews259 followers
October 31, 2020
Weird is a theme here, but good weird, weird that you like. 🤭❤

It is a simple story, an Air Force Officer it's in the middle of attacking aliens who have come to earth when he's saved from his own plane (wich is malfunctioning at this point) by said aliens. The ones who save him take him into some universal port and find him a job being a "nanny", but that was a miscommunication and in reality he's to be a surrogate. Then he meets Rick a kind octopus, Max fathers his children and falls in love with his new family and bond mate.

I think this story is entertaining as hell, sometimes I surprised myself at how well I took all the weirdness and I felt touched a lot of times. This was posible because the characters were lovely as hell, Rick, Max, Xander, James and Kohei were so cute and warm together. Also I think it helped that it's a book, so sometimes my brain forgot that it is a creature and went for it!

But still I got some good lessons for this. 1) Love is love, no matter how chape, form, color, or whatever else. If two people/creatures connect and are good to each other, to hell with the rest! 2) Communication is important, everyone has to work on it in their relationships, whatever those are. 3) Giving importance to physical appearance it's bullshit, but I already knew that one. 4) Tentacles are not so bad. 🤣❤

I really liked this and I'm sure as hell reading the next one. Weirdly lovely! 🥰❤
Profile Image for QuietlyKat.
671 reviews13 followers
December 29, 2021
How completely unexpected! Even kind of, sort of, possibly knowing where Earth Fathers Are Weird was going to go, I was still completely and very happily blown away by where it ended up.

I have to start by saying that tentacle play has never come across my path; I don’t seek it out and have never really given it much thought. I am neither pro nor anti tentacle. If you specifically seek out tentacle play, you may be hoping to get more than what actually happens here and if you’re avoidant of it, it’s limited to just 2 scenes so the rest of the story may still work for you.

What DOES work for me and what I DO gravitate toward is romance featuring outcasts, those who are different, out of the mainstream, other. The more different, the better. When done well, the social statements made about acceptance and love across the spectrum are profound and meaningful. And Earth Fathers Are Weird is very well done.

Though I called the story a romance, it was… um… something different… something more… Max and Rick’s relationship is affectionate and mutually supportive, but it’s mostly platonic for the majority of the book. They bond slowly and meaningfully over time and it’s not about physical or sexual attraction, though Max does have fantasies, much to his surprise. While I sort of stumble over calling it a romance, at times it was wildly romantic.

EFAW is quirky, unique and thoroughly engaging. I picked it up last night and could not put it down. If I’d been able to keep my eyes open, I’d have devoured it in one sitting, reading through the night and into the dawn. As it was, I forced myself to put it down and sleep after 3 am and then spent the rest of the night dreaming of Max and Rick.

My enjoyment of this story exceeds 5 stars despite a couple of minor details. There are some physiological details that I found implausible/probably impossible and some of the technology and their ability to communicate that had me scratching my head but in the end, those things barely blipped because I was enjoying the story and relationships so very much.

Though EFAW isn’t available to borrow via KU or the library, it was worth every penny and I am so happy to have it and it’s sequel in my library permanently. Now on to Earth Husbands Are Odd!

Edited to add:
The following is hinted at in the blurb but is a spoiler that includes some plot points that may be off putting to some readers in several ways.

Profile Image for Lisazj1.
2,072 reviews194 followers
May 7, 2019
4.5 stars! I loved it. Lyn Gala is so tremendously talented at making her very alien heroes sweet, kind and all too human. This was absolutely adorable (tentacles and all, LOL) with some unexpectedly tense action. I loved how Max, Rick and the boys became a family, and how protective Max was of all of them, just as Rick and the boys were of him. So damn sweet. ❤️

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