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When Women Stop Hating Their Bodies: Freeing Yourself from Food and Weight Obsession
“Will empower all women to stop believing that our bodies are the problems, dieting the solution.”—Harriet Lerner, Ph.D., author of The Dance of Anger
In this revolutionary new book, bestselling authors Carol Munter and Jane Hirschmann explore the myriad reasons why women cling to diets despite overwhelming evidence that diets don’t work . In fact, diets turn us into compulsive eaters obsessed with food and weight.
Munter and Hirschmann call this syndrome “Bad Body Fever” and demonstrate how “bad body thoughts” are clues to our emotional lives. They explore the difficulties women encounter replacing dieting with demand feeding. And finally, they teach us how to think about our problems rather than eat about them—so that food can resume its proper place in our lives.
“Many women will find in these pages exactly what they determined, optimistic, and resourceful coaches, pausing at the right moments to acknowledge the difficulty of change, then passionately urging them to press on.”—Susan C. Wooley, Ph.D., Professor of Psychology, Codirector, Eating Disorder Center University of Cincinnati Medical Center
In this revolutionary new book, bestselling authors Carol Munter and Jane Hirschmann explore the myriad reasons why women cling to diets despite overwhelming evidence that diets don’t work . In fact, diets turn us into compulsive eaters obsessed with food and weight.
Munter and Hirschmann call this syndrome “Bad Body Fever” and demonstrate how “bad body thoughts” are clues to our emotional lives. They explore the difficulties women encounter replacing dieting with demand feeding. And finally, they teach us how to think about our problems rather than eat about them—so that food can resume its proper place in our lives.
“Many women will find in these pages exactly what they determined, optimistic, and resourceful coaches, pausing at the right moments to acknowledge the difficulty of change, then passionately urging them to press on.”—Susan C. Wooley, Ph.D., Professor of Psychology, Codirector, Eating Disorder Center University of Cincinnati Medical Center
384 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1995
58 people are currently reading
610 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews
April 9, 2009
If you have ever looked at your body in the mirror and said yuck, this is a book for you.
Hirschmann argues that the loathing of fat is a by-product of our anti-female, misogynist culture. She points out that until women got the vote our naturally rounded and padded figures were accepted as the norm. Women turned their collective rage about being second-class citizens inward and began to loathe their feminine bodies. Thus, the flat-chested, boy-like figures that came into vogue in the 1920's.
She also argues that one of the major reasons that we have a major problem with obesity in this country is because of fad diets. While on these diets, people begin to assign values to foods and also to themselves, i.e. "If I eat cupcakes today, a "bad" food, then I am a "bad" person." When values are assigned to food, people tend to binge on the "forbidden" food, causing overeating and consequently obesity.
A good example of how all this plays out in our culture is that you often hear women say, "my husband can eat anything he wants, he is so lucky." Why can your husband eat anything but you cannot? Because his body is different from yours? Because he is a slender male and you are a voluptuous female? Why shouldn't we eat the foods we enjoy as well? This is different than eating excessively, but when my husband eats ice cream every night, I don't think he's a glutton or a un-disciplined pig, but how quickly do I attack myself using those very words for doing the same thing?
When you think about it, we are very cruel to ourselves and other women when we treat ourselves this way. Ladies, let's purge anti-fat, anti-female talk from our lives, and live in a more dignified way, especially for the sake of our daughters--and down with diets!
Hirschmann argues that the loathing of fat is a by-product of our anti-female, misogynist culture. She points out that until women got the vote our naturally rounded and padded figures were accepted as the norm. Women turned their collective rage about being second-class citizens inward and began to loathe their feminine bodies. Thus, the flat-chested, boy-like figures that came into vogue in the 1920's.
She also argues that one of the major reasons that we have a major problem with obesity in this country is because of fad diets. While on these diets, people begin to assign values to foods and also to themselves, i.e. "If I eat cupcakes today, a "bad" food, then I am a "bad" person." When values are assigned to food, people tend to binge on the "forbidden" food, causing overeating and consequently obesity.
A good example of how all this plays out in our culture is that you often hear women say, "my husband can eat anything he wants, he is so lucky." Why can your husband eat anything but you cannot? Because his body is different from yours? Because he is a slender male and you are a voluptuous female? Why shouldn't we eat the foods we enjoy as well? This is different than eating excessively, but when my husband eats ice cream every night, I don't think he's a glutton or a un-disciplined pig, but how quickly do I attack myself using those very words for doing the same thing?
When you think about it, we are very cruel to ourselves and other women when we treat ourselves this way. Ladies, let's purge anti-fat, anti-female talk from our lives, and live in a more dignified way, especially for the sake of our daughters--and down with diets!
June 27, 2007
This book reads a bit like a how-to manual, so if you're just interested in reading analysis of how our culture/media treat women's bodies then I would recommend Bitchfest, Carolyn Knapp's Appetites, or the Beauty Myth. If you want to learn steps to stop emotional eating or to adore your body at any size, then you'll really like this. That being said, this book definitely incorporates a heavy dose of feminism and cultural critique. I personally think any woman could benefit from reading this book, but unless this kind of thing is somewhat of an issue in your life, you might want to try a less instructive selection.
January 11, 2008
i randomly came across this gem of a book at bluestockings bookstore in the lower east side, and had actually bought for a friend of mine to read during the holidays. but after skimming through the intro and first chapter, i realized this is a book that *everyone* should really have on their shelf, no matter where you stand on the body/self-esteem spectrum. what i like about the book is that it offers a glimpse into the pervasive "bad body fever" which affects people of all sizes, shapes and ages--and the book actually offers practical advice about how to deal with it!! no matter what health regimen you're on, truly striving to be at peace yourself is key to optimal health, and puts you in a better position to care for your body in loving, accepting way.
February 24, 2015
Read this many years ago, when I finally decided to stop dieting and make peace with food and my body. It took longer than I thought to accomplish this, but this book definitely showed me the way. Every woman who obsesses about food or her body should read this book.
May 28, 2025
Wow, just wow. This book was such an eye opener. I have been working on intuitive eating for 1,5 years now and this book showed me that I still have a long way to go. I thought I had legalized food. Turned out: I haven't. I also don't feed myself on demand because of social norms. This book gave me some insights that I didn't get from other IE books. It might be old, but it hasn't lost its actuality. I cannot recommend this book enough to anyone who wants to stop dieting or learn more about intuitive eating.
Want to read
February 18, 2009I just read a really interesting blog post about how this book changed a girl's life. I really liked the ideas she highlighted. Although I feel like I'm in a really good spot now, it just seems like it has great ideologies for a life-long relationship with food and body perception--which, seriously, doesn't every girl need??
October 4, 2007
A revolutionary book and one that I try diligently to live my life by.
August 26, 2018
Must read
I think all women should read this book. Eye opening truths here. Reading this book is a form of rebellion- do it
I think all women should read this book. Eye opening truths here. Reading this book is a form of rebellion- do it
March 17, 2019
Classic feminist piece that every woman should read. It will shift your paradigm around the shape of your body and the culture of dieting.
March 13, 2018
I'm on the fence about this one. On the one hand, there is a lot of helpful practical advice for people who suffer with binge eating, and some of it I will definitely try. On the other hand, the authors talk a lot about weight and body issues being linked to childhood issues, but what about those of us who suffered issues as an adult? It's not as easy as teaching yourself that as an adult you can now set your own boundaries and limits, when you have had those boundaries trangressed as an adult. The book didn't seem to deal with that aspect at all. I think overall it is showing its age somewhat.
May 22, 2018
Honestly, I wish I hadn't requested this book through Inter Library Loan. If I hadn't read anything else about the failure of diets and body image, this would have been okay. I've read better books so this just wasn't worth my time. I do feel bad about wasting library staff time (my library and the library the book came from).
September 22, 2017
This is a book that's helped me a lot in resolving my issues with body image and eating, even if it did take me a long time to get through. A definite recommendation for people who want to get off the never-ending diet train.
August 5, 2018
At points I was thinking: this is just a book on incantations. But at least these people are trying to get somewhere, compared with the millions of academic paper pushers and governmental feminists plotting excel graphs and cute logos to help their careers and pensions.
October 12, 2018
One of the best explanations of emotional eating that I have ever read. I can't wait to incorporate these ideas into my nursing practice.
November 19, 2018
A great introduction to the topic of body positivity and ditching dieting. I appreciate the feminist lens the book uses.
December 19, 2020
3.5 stars. Maybe 4. It's got an interesting perspective and some new ideas I hadn't considered, like that all our "bad body thoughts" are actually about other issues we have yet to face in our lives.
July 2, 2023
Very useful, life changing to look at this issue through this lens. Feminist. Still relevant 30 years later!
September 13, 2021
This book gives an interesting alternative to the diet culture that we're constantly immersed in. It can be dry at times, and took me a long time to get through, but the ideas behind it were enough to keep me coming back.
June 28, 2013
Picked this book up off the free shelf at the library and the title intrigued me. After all, what woman doesn't hate something about their body? I am 40 and can't say that I have ever met a woman who doesn't hate something or want to lose weight at some point. The authors had some good points about binging in that when we deny ourselves from a certain food we set ourselves up for failure when we encounter it because we'll binge on it because our body goes into "starvation mode" for it. They also talked about "mouth hunger" and "stomach hunger." After all, in our culture I do think that we eat out of boredom, for anger, and just socially. The authors' point of eating for stomach hunger and ignoring others urging to join them at mealtimes might work for some but just didn't seem practical to me. After all, at some point, you are going to have to sit down to be social and join others around a table filled with food. I feel you have to prepare yourself and plan for these times. I have never truly struggled with being overweight so I don't have the "food obsession" that this book addressed and trying to end that so some of their points just don't work for me. I find for myself, I do allow myself to eat all foods in moderation in reasonable quantities along with plenty of exercise daily. I guess in the end we all need to make peace with our food and our bodies. I know now that I am forty I am more at peace with my body but would still like to lose a few pounds. (The authors would be so disappointed in me!) However, if I never do, I am okay with myself as long as I am healthy and can get around.
August 3, 2016
Below is a repeat of my review to Overcoming Overeating and the reason I did this is that while this was the second book on the subject, they both are about the same method:
I wish I could give this book MORE than 5 stars - I first read this book decades ago when it first came out and it "saved" my life - literally!
Man or woman, but especially if you are a woman and have food compulsions, shame about food, have used food to take care of yourself, this method is the ONLY one I know of that works. It takes years and loads of self-care, which by the way, is really the basis of the method - learning to give yourself the self-care you didn't get as a child, but used food instead.
It can feel stressful at first to stock up on formerly forbidden foods, throw out the scale, throw away (or donate) clothing that doesn't fit and some of the other items in the book, but stick to it, remember you don't have to do it all at once and perfection is not the answer.
I wish I could give this book MORE than 5 stars - I first read this book decades ago when it first came out and it "saved" my life - literally!
Man or woman, but especially if you are a woman and have food compulsions, shame about food, have used food to take care of yourself, this method is the ONLY one I know of that works. It takes years and loads of self-care, which by the way, is really the basis of the method - learning to give yourself the self-care you didn't get as a child, but used food instead.
It can feel stressful at first to stock up on formerly forbidden foods, throw out the scale, throw away (or donate) clothing that doesn't fit and some of the other items in the book, but stick to it, remember you don't have to do it all at once and perfection is not the answer.
August 19, 2015
Munter and Hirschmann assert that we are "all born with perfectly adequate signals for hunger and satiation and that we can rediscover that inner knowledge of demand feeding, teaching us how to think about our problems rather than eat about them - so that food can resume its proper place in our lives.
"The fundamental tenet of this new thinking is that fat is not a moral violation nor is it a measure of intellect, popularity, sensitivity, leadership, or character. Your body size reflects your genetics, metabolism, years of dieting, age, and history of using food to allay anxiety." (p 303)
"The fundamental tenet of this new thinking is that fat is not a moral violation nor is it a measure of intellect, popularity, sensitivity, leadership, or character. Your body size reflects your genetics, metabolism, years of dieting, age, and history of using food to allay anxiety." (p 303)
May 12, 2016
There is much to say about this book. I will begin saying that I am glad I picked it up. There are some things or ideas in this book that I don't agree with 100% but I find that with all books. However, I found more helpful things in this book and I can overlook or adjust those things that I don't agree with to fit my situation and view.
Read
July 8, 2009I was hoping for something else from this book. I was not looking for a feminist rant on how everything in my life is wrong because we live in a patriarchical society.
My interest level dwindled quickly.
My interest level dwindled quickly.
August 18, 2016
I didn't finish this book. I agree with a lot of what this book is putting across but it's far too full of misandry for my liking. It made it difficult for me to read and take anything positive from it. Luckily I already stopped hating my body!
Read
March 25, 2007This has been really helpful as I strive to find peace with my body...something I think we're always struggling with even when we think we're happy!
April 7, 2008
Again, I read this book often. Its fantastic.
April 19, 2009
Crazy like a fox.
Want to read
October 13, 2009from Wellesley College
January 17, 2016
Five stars for the feminist commentary regarding societies asinine expectations of female bodies. Three stars for the anti-diet plan, which was most of the book.
Read
April 12, 2013Absolutely fantastic. I would recommend this book to women and men.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews