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What I Lick Before Your Face ... and Other Haikus By Dogs
Imagine if your dog could talk to you. Better still, imagine if it could express its innermost feelings in poetic form. This hilarious, insightful book confirms what we've all long suspected - that inside every dog is the soul of a poet. From retrieving sticks to rivalry with cats; from cold winter walks to endlessly chasing tennis balls, no stone of a dog's life is left unturned. With a delightful photo alongside every haiku, this is the perfect gift for any dog lover.
128 pages, Hardcover
First published November 1, 2018
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196 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 66 reviews
April 20, 2022
HAPPY POETRY MONTH!
april is national poetry month,
so here come thirty floats!
the cynics here will call this plan
a shameless grab for votes.
and maybe there’s some truth to that—
i do love validation,
but charitably consider it
a rhyme-y celebration.
i don’t intend to flood your feed—
i’ll just post one a day.
endure four weeks of reruns
and then it will be may!
**************************
Licks
You seem to think that
The licking thing signals love
Salt is delicious
if you've run out of books by Francesco Marciuliano, don't despair—this jamie coleman guy is ALSO driving the "poems by dogs and cats" bus, so clamber aboard!! and while, like marciuliano's many-book output, his is also full of adorable doggie photographs accompanying the haiku'd thoughts and feelings of these pooches, i have saved his for you to discover 'twixt the covers, scouring the internet for my own doggie-pics to post here instead. and lemme tell you, the research process was GRUELING, but i have made this generous sacrifice for all of you.
please enjoy my favorite poems from this collection, and also some cute friggin' dogs.
Rubs
It hurts my feelings
When you avoid stroking there
Nipples are me too
Playing
I do not believe
That your fixation with my
Playing dead is fine
The Lead
You make me bring you
This harness of oppression
In my own damn mouth
Perspective
To be fair, although
I have made rather a mess
You steal testicles
Your Things
You keep throwing it
I keep on bringing it back
Look. After. Your. Things.
Beg
What kind of a man
Will only feed their best friend
If they beg for it?
Toilet
I have a complaint
Someone keeps leaving huge poops
In my special bowl
The Outside Bell
It is very rude
That you don't call out in joy
When people arrive
An Offering
I do not have much
But what little that I do
I place in your shoes
Crayons
Oh, kind tiny one
Who fed me the colored sticks
Now I poop rainbows
After the Puddle
We can both agree
That the only solution
Is violent shaking
that one probably deserves a few more GIFs*
AND THAT IS A BOOK ABOUT DOGS WHO WRITE POEMS.
*all of these can be found in still-form in Shake and Shake Puppies, which are also books you need.
come to my blog!
april is national poetry month,
so here come thirty floats!
the cynics here will call this plan
a shameless grab for votes.
and maybe there’s some truth to that—
i do love validation,
but charitably consider it
a rhyme-y celebration.
i don’t intend to flood your feed—
i’ll just post one a day.
endure four weeks of reruns
and then it will be may!
**************************
Licks
You seem to think that
The licking thing signals love
Salt is delicious
if you've run out of books by Francesco Marciuliano, don't despair—this jamie coleman guy is ALSO driving the "poems by dogs and cats" bus, so clamber aboard!! and while, like marciuliano's many-book output, his is also full of adorable doggie photographs accompanying the haiku'd thoughts and feelings of these pooches, i have saved his for you to discover 'twixt the covers, scouring the internet for my own doggie-pics to post here instead. and lemme tell you, the research process was GRUELING, but i have made this generous sacrifice for all of you.
please enjoy my favorite poems from this collection, and also some cute friggin' dogs.
Rubs
It hurts my feelings
When you avoid stroking there
Nipples are me too
Playing
I do not believe
That your fixation with my
Playing dead is fine
The Lead
You make me bring you
This harness of oppression
In my own damn mouth
Perspective
To be fair, although
I have made rather a mess
You steal testicles
Your Things
You keep throwing it
I keep on bringing it back
Look. After. Your. Things.
Beg
What kind of a man
Will only feed their best friend
If they beg for it?
Toilet
I have a complaint
Someone keeps leaving huge poops
In my special bowl
The Outside Bell
It is very rude
That you don't call out in joy
When people arrive
An Offering
I do not have much
But what little that I do
I place in your shoes
Crayons
Oh, kind tiny one
Who fed me the colored sticks
Now I poop rainbows
After the Puddle
We can both agree
That the only solution
Is violent shaking
that one probably deserves a few more GIFs*
AND THAT IS A BOOK ABOUT DOGS WHO WRITE POEMS.
*all of these can be found in still-form in Shake and Shake Puppies, which are also books you need.
come to my blog!
January 9, 2022
The title is so clever, it grabbed me and pulled me in. This is a lovely book of Haikus, each poem is accompanied by a gorgeous photo of a dog. The pose of each dog captures the spirit of the accompanying Haiku. I was overjoyed to see a photo of a Blue Roan English Cocker Spaniel. I owned one once and still miss her, she was lovely. The Haikus are very clever, some made me laugh out loud, others tweaked my heartstrings and some of the bathroom humor made me go, "Eew."
If I had to choose a favorite Haiku, it would be this one:
"Returning" by Jamie Coleman
"Whenever you leave
The wonder of your return
Almost makes things whole"
If I had to choose a favorite Haiku, it would be this one:
"Returning" by Jamie Coleman
"Whenever you leave
The wonder of your return
Almost makes things whole"
December 16, 2021
What I Lick Before Your Face ... and Other Haikus By Dogs
by Jamie Coleman
This is such a wonderful, witty, and charming book! Anyone who has dogs will relate to these haikus! The photos are heartwarming and hilarious too! Perfect for each poem. The book is just right for gift giving or setting out on a side table or coffee table. Definitely a conversation starter!
by Jamie Coleman
This is such a wonderful, witty, and charming book! Anyone who has dogs will relate to these haikus! The photos are heartwarming and hilarious too! Perfect for each poem. The book is just right for gift giving or setting out on a side table or coffee table. Definitely a conversation starter!
January 3, 2020
I gifted this to my dog-mommy best friend for Christmas but couldn't help but read it before wrapping it and giving it to her. *lol*
Haikus, for those who don't know, are traditional Japanese poems, the shortest poems in the world. They usually have three sentences going in the order 5 syllables 7 syllables and then 5 syllables again. Moreover, the idea of a haiku is "cutting", which is to say that there is a cutting word (kireji) funtioning as a punctuation between the juxtaposition of two images or ideas.
Anyway, this little book collects such tiny poems that were written by dogs *winks* and they are hilarious. We address the seriously funny fact that humans pick up the poo of their best friends, what dogs might think about us throwing things for them to bring back, what they lick before they lick our faces (as the title promises) and much more.
The haikus are accompanied by photographs of dogs of all breeds in all kinds of situations and when making a number of silly faces.
Here is an example for your amusement:
A really funny look at the dog-human relationship from the dogs' perspectives that made me laugh out loud several times (and my friend, too, by the way).
Haikus, for those who don't know, are traditional Japanese poems, the shortest poems in the world. They usually have three sentences going in the order 5 syllables 7 syllables and then 5 syllables again. Moreover, the idea of a haiku is "cutting", which is to say that there is a cutting word (kireji) funtioning as a punctuation between the juxtaposition of two images or ideas.
Anyway, this little book collects such tiny poems that were written by dogs *winks* and they are hilarious. We address the seriously funny fact that humans pick up the poo of their best friends, what dogs might think about us throwing things for them to bring back, what they lick before they lick our faces (as the title promises) and much more.
The haikus are accompanied by photographs of dogs of all breeds in all kinds of situations and when making a number of silly faces.
Here is an example for your amusement:
A really funny look at the dog-human relationship from the dogs' perspectives that made me laugh out loud several times (and my friend, too, by the way).
October 24, 2019
As the proud owner of 4 rescue dogs, I totally needed this book! Not only is it filled with doggie wisdom in poetry form, but it also has lots of awesome photos as well. Fun and entertaining!
This collection of 64 Haiku covers just about everything Dog from drinking out of the toilet to turning in circles before laying down. The verses are funny, cute and sometimes disturbing. Who wants to think about what a dog licks before it licks your face? :) The photos are adorable and picture dogs of all sizes, big and small.
My favorite is this gem:
An Offering
I do not have much
But what little that I do
I place in your shoes
I have had many an early morning's awesome discovery of slobbery dog bones tucked lovingly into my shoes for safe keeping. There is just nothing like the slick feel of partially eaten Nyla bone on bare toes. *Shudder*
As I read these poems I kept chuckling to myself. Yeah, my dogs could have penned each and every one of these little snippets of doggie joy. :)
I highly recommend this book for dog lovers! It would make a great gift to anyone who loves their fur babies, or just for a fun, cute read for anybody!
Full marks from me! Great fun!
**I voluntarily read a review copy of this book from Atria Books via NetGalley. All opinions expressed are entirely my own. My dogs approve this review. Woof, woof!**
This collection of 64 Haiku covers just about everything Dog from drinking out of the toilet to turning in circles before laying down. The verses are funny, cute and sometimes disturbing. Who wants to think about what a dog licks before it licks your face? :) The photos are adorable and picture dogs of all sizes, big and small.
My favorite is this gem:
An Offering
I do not have much
But what little that I do
I place in your shoes
I have had many an early morning's awesome discovery of slobbery dog bones tucked lovingly into my shoes for safe keeping. There is just nothing like the slick feel of partially eaten Nyla bone on bare toes. *Shudder*
As I read these poems I kept chuckling to myself. Yeah, my dogs could have penned each and every one of these little snippets of doggie joy. :)
I highly recommend this book for dog lovers! It would make a great gift to anyone who loves their fur babies, or just for a fun, cute read for anybody!
Full marks from me! Great fun!
**I voluntarily read a review copy of this book from Atria Books via NetGalley. All opinions expressed are entirely my own. My dogs approve this review. Woof, woof!**
September 22, 2019
A charming, witty and entertaining book of haikus and pictures of our four legged friends.
This was fun to read, a great gift for dog lovers.
The beautiful color photos of the many different breeds are so expressive and heartwarming.
The title haiku was probably my favorite, but the one below really tugs at my heart!
Returning
Whenever you leave
The wonder of your return
Almost makes things whole
A must have for all dog moms and dads!
Thank you to @meganrudloff and Atria Books for the gifted copy.
This was fun to read, a great gift for dog lovers.
The beautiful color photos of the many different breeds are so expressive and heartwarming.
The title haiku was probably my favorite, but the one below really tugs at my heart!
Returning
Whenever you leave
The wonder of your return
Almost makes things whole
A must have for all dog moms and dads!
Thank you to @meganrudloff and Atria Books for the gifted copy.
December 16, 2019
Adorable book! I loved all the pictures of the different dogs. The poems made me smile and some of them are so true!
January 10, 2022
These little haikus remind you why dogs are man's best friend...
Some of the poems are a bit close to the mark. But this book should be read while you gaze at the wonderful pictures which accompany them.
Some of the poems are a bit close to the mark. But this book should be read while you gaze at the wonderful pictures which accompany them.
February 26, 2020
Bij het zien van de schitterende cover van Wat ik lik voor ik je gezicht lik van Jamie Coleman weet je meteen waar het boek over zal gaan. De hond met zijn tong uit zijn bek is heel erg goed gekozen. Bij het lezen van de titel schiet je in de lach, maar het is nog maar de vraag of je het wel echt wil weten. Het boek is heel erg mooi vormgegeven, niet alleen van buiten, maar ook van binnen. Bij elke haiku staat een bijpassende foto van een hond. Bij de meeste foto's blijf je nog even kijken omdat ze zo mooi zijn of omdat een hond zo aandoenlijk kijkt.
De haiku's in Wat ik lik voor ik je gezicht lik van Jamie Coleman zullen bij iedereen die een hond heeft of heeft gehad heel erg bekend voorkomen en geregeld in de lach schieten zoals bijvoorbeeld de haiku 'Naar het park'. Voor je overigens de eerste haiku leest, mits je niet zomaar ergens bent begonnen, maar netjes bij het begin bent begonnen, kan je lezen wat een haiku is, wat dat inhoudt.
De auteur heeft zich heel erg goed weten in te leven in de honden. Je kan merken dat hij een hond heeft en ze jaren heeft geobserveerd.
Lees verder op https://surfingann.blogspot.com/2020/... .
De haiku's in Wat ik lik voor ik je gezicht lik van Jamie Coleman zullen bij iedereen die een hond heeft of heeft gehad heel erg bekend voorkomen en geregeld in de lach schieten zoals bijvoorbeeld de haiku 'Naar het park'. Voor je overigens de eerste haiku leest, mits je niet zomaar ergens bent begonnen, maar netjes bij het begin bent begonnen, kan je lezen wat een haiku is, wat dat inhoudt.
De auteur heeft zich heel erg goed weten in te leven in de honden. Je kan merken dat hij een hond heeft en ze jaren heeft geobserveerd.
Lees verder op https://surfingann.blogspot.com/2020/... .
October 16, 2019
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for providing me with an advanced copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
I think this is the cutest book I’ve seen in quite a while. It is hilarious and full of adorable pictures of dogs. This is a quick read and one you can pick up again and again and enjoy. Perfect book to gift to the dog lovers in your life. Highly recommended for a quick pick-me-up!
I think this is the cutest book I’ve seen in quite a while. It is hilarious and full of adorable pictures of dogs. This is a quick read and one you can pick up again and again and enjoy. Perfect book to gift to the dog lovers in your life. Highly recommended for a quick pick-me-up!
November 7, 2019
This is such a wonderful collection of poems. It was the perfect mixture of sweet, sad and just plain hilarious. I think this a perfect gift for any dog lover and its guaranteed to make you smile!
*Thank you again to Atria Books for sending me a copy!*
*Thank you again to Atria Books for sending me a copy!*
May 5, 2019
Wonderfully subversive and laugh-out-loud funny.
My thanks to Edelweiss and the publisher for providing me with this digital review copy.
My thanks to Edelweiss and the publisher for providing me with this digital review copy.
February 9, 2023
Super cute and funny. Very relatable. Dogs are the best.
June 21, 2023
A great Father’s Day gift from my daughter.
November 11, 2019
Poems About Poop (and True Love!)
(Full disclosure: I received a free e-ARC for review through Netgalley.)
If my dog could write haikus, I'd like to imagine that he'd wax poetic about his undying love for me: his human, his nurse, his cheerleader; the one constant in his chaotic (albeit tragically short) life. The one person who's stuck by him, through better and worse (and the absolute worst). In reality, it'd probably be a lot of poop talk, interspersed with odes to his favorite noms and a thinly veiled death threat or two for the cat.
Oh, and oodles of anxiety, a la Hyperbole and a Half. He and I, we're simpatico, you see.
![2019-10-01 - Finnick Leopard - 0024 [Original]](https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/hostedimages/1573491960i/28435763.jpg)
What I Lick Before Your Face ... and Other Haikus By Dogs pairs haikus - presumably channeled through author Jaime Coleman by his canine friends - with black and white photos of the very best 12/10 puppers you've ever seen. Spoiler alert: there is a preponderance of bathroom talk, along with a weird (though not altogether unwelcome) fixation on Boston terriers.
The haikus range from silly and whimsical to tender and downright tearjerking. To wit:
Grass
Why do I eat grass?
Perhaps today is the day
It is sausages
Best Friend
The definition
Of friendship must surely be
You, a bag, my poop
Rubs
It hurts my feelings
When you avoid stroking there
Nipples are me too
The Lead
You make me bring you
This harness of oppression
In my own damn mouth
Going to Live on the Farm
Guys, there is no farm
I wish there was, but there is
Only nothingness
I will never skip your nips, sweet doggo. NEVER.
Anyway, What I Lick Before Your Face would make a great gift for people who love poetry or dogs, and the best gift for those who heart both (and really, who doesn't?).
http://www.easyvegan.info/2019/12/23/...
(Full disclosure: I received a free e-ARC for review through Netgalley.)
If my dog could write haikus, I'd like to imagine that he'd wax poetic about his undying love for me: his human, his nurse, his cheerleader; the one constant in his chaotic (albeit tragically short) life. The one person who's stuck by him, through better and worse (and the absolute worst). In reality, it'd probably be a lot of poop talk, interspersed with odes to his favorite noms and a thinly veiled death threat or two for the cat.
Oh, and oodles of anxiety, a la Hyperbole and a Half. He and I, we're simpatico, you see.
What I Lick Before Your Face ... and Other Haikus By Dogs pairs haikus - presumably channeled through author Jaime Coleman by his canine friends - with black and white photos of the very best 12/10 puppers you've ever seen. Spoiler alert: there is a preponderance of bathroom talk, along with a weird (though not altogether unwelcome) fixation on Boston terriers.
The haikus range from silly and whimsical to tender and downright tearjerking. To wit:
Grass
Why do I eat grass?
Perhaps today is the day
It is sausages
Best Friend
The definition
Of friendship must surely be
You, a bag, my poop
Rubs
It hurts my feelings
When you avoid stroking there
Nipples are me too
The Lead
You make me bring you
This harness of oppression
In my own damn mouth
Going to Live on the Farm
Guys, there is no farm
I wish there was, but there is
Only nothingness
I will never skip your nips, sweet doggo. NEVER.
Anyway, What I Lick Before Your Face would make a great gift for people who love poetry or dogs, and the best gift for those who heart both (and really, who doesn't?).
http://www.easyvegan.info/2019/12/23/...
October 29, 2019
Doggie haiku. Hilarious. Just what one needs sometimes to lighten things up.
November 30, 2018
I actually read this months ago because I got my grubby paws on a copy before publication, and I honestly cried with laughter.
My favourites are a toss up between
Perspective
To be fair, although
I have made a mess
You steal testicles
and
Who's a Good Boy
I no longer know
If you're being genuine
Or rhetorical
My favourites are a toss up between
Perspective
To be fair, although
I have made a mess
You steal testicles
and
Who's a Good Boy
I no longer know
If you're being genuine
Or rhetorical
June 13, 2019
Lol! I love dogs and Jamie Coleman has them down pat! I am sure this is exactly what our dogs think. I love the haikus and these ones are just grand. Put it on a buy list if you love dogs. Make a great gift for the dog lovers in your life, as well. Photos are perfect accompaniments to the poems. Brilliant!
I received a Kindle arc from Netgalley in exchange for a fair review.
I received a Kindle arc from Netgalley in exchange for a fair review.
November 24, 2019
This an adorable book that would make a great stocking stuffer for the dog lovers in your life.
A cute picture of a dog accompanies each haiku. These are not sappy haikus..these are sarcastic, funny haikus making fun of humans thinking chasing balls is fun. Of dogs peeing everywhere.
I love dogs. Loved this book
A cute picture of a dog accompanies each haiku. These are not sappy haikus..these are sarcastic, funny haikus making fun of humans thinking chasing balls is fun. Of dogs peeing everywhere.
I love dogs. Loved this book
December 25, 2019
This is the first book of Haiku's I have read. I once read a book about how to write haiku and that book had Haiku's in it. But, I have never read a book that only had Haiku's in it.
I liked the pictures that went along with the Haiku's. My favorite Haiku from the book is called crayons. The picture that goes along with crayons is adorable.
I liked the pictures that went along with the Haiku's. My favorite Haiku from the book is called crayons. The picture that goes along with crayons is adorable.
December 31, 2019
Super cute book of dog-inspired haikus. From chewing on things to drinking toilet water, there’s some really funny ones and some super cute ones. Perfect coffee table book (if your dog won’t eat it) or gift to a fellow dog lover!
March 9, 2021
I will own this book and keep it on my coffee table and read from it every time I have a visitor to make them laugh because this was such a fun read! Quick, but beautifully put together and tons of picture of cute doggos! HIGHLY RECOMMEND!
January 9, 2022
Brilliant! I loved the photographs that went with the haikus and the haikus were hilarious. One of my favorites was Crayons, the picture of a dog with a baby: "Oh, kind tiny one, Who fed me colored sticks. Now I poop rainbows." A welcome escape.
November 8, 2018
Short but hilarious read. Well worth it if you want a laugh or you’re having a bad day.
December 26, 2018
I read this on Dec 26, 2018 but am not counting it in my challenge list as it’s only small. Mum gave it to me on Christmas Day. It is absolutely hilarious and gorgeous. Loved it.
January 4, 2019
I'm pretty sure only dog people will get it.
October 20, 2019
I absolutely love this book!! It has the cutest little poems that are both heartwarming and funny. The photos are beautifull as well. Perfect book for any dog lover. Highly recommend!
October 22, 2019
Hilarious!
November 18, 2019
Thank you to Atria Books for this copy! We all wonder what dogs could say if they could talk, and this book of haikus does a pretty good job of it!
November 20, 2019
Hilarious!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 66 reviews