It's Not Me, It's You: Subjective Recollections from a Terminally Optimistic, Chronically Sarcastic and Occasionally Inebriated Woman

by Stefanie Wilder-Taylor

Stefanie Wilder-Taylor has never been one to take the easy, conventional route. In her latest work It’s Not Me, It’s You, she unabashedly showcases a life well lived, ignoring all wisdom, but yet somehow, coming out on top. Combining her trademark biting wit and straightforward common sense, the anticipated comedic memoir delivers outrageous tales from all periods of her life and family history. From Taylor’s outlook on working hard (audition for a game show instead) to getting her husband to propose (forget The try nagging and physical violence) these stories venture beyond daycare, sure to entertain both parents and non-parents alike. Covering a wide range of topics that explore the anxiety, frustration, and exhaustion that accompany the rewarding, comical, awe-inspiring, and life-altering roles of parent, teenager, wife, and daughter, It’s Not Me, It’s You offers readers an escape, empathy, and plenty of laughs.

Genres: Humor, Nonfiction, Memoir, Essays, Chick Lit, Biography, Mental Health

240 pages, Hardcover

First published April 7, 2009

About the author

Stefanie Wilder-Taylor is the author of six books including Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay, Gummi Bears Should Not be Organic and her latest, Drunk-ish. She also co-hosts the hit podcast For Crying Out Loud as well as Rose Pricks and Bored AF. She lives in Los Angeles with her husband, three teenagers and her dog, Penelope. She no longer drinks but she may have a serious problem with sugar-free popsicles.

Reviews

[Holly Lee · Rating 3 out of 5]

You all may remember my recent review of Stefanie Wilder-Taylor's "Sippy Cups Are Not For Chardonnay". I loved it! I thought that the stories were insightful, hilarious and candid. The latest book from Stefanie Wilder-Taylor is her own memoir. She takes us through growing up, all the way through carrying her twins in a high risk pregnancy.

One of the things I like most about her writing is her -holds nothing back- style. She talks openly and candidly about life situations and her reactions to them. She obviously has a knack for humor as well. Her father was a bit of a deadbeat, a stand-up comedian who walked out on the family early on, but left Stefanie with sharp wit.

I am not surprised at all that she is friends with Chelsea Handler, the two have very similar styles of writing and story telling. Naturally if you like the two books by Chelsea Handler you will really enjoy what Stefanie Wilder-Taylor writes about.

My biggest complaint about the book would be the ending, or lack thereof. The book just kind of stopped. I actually wondered if I was missing some pages. I think that the book needs an additional chapter at the end to wrap things up. They way that it is currently left off is strange.

[Pam · Rating 1 out of 5]

I would not recommend this book to anyone. The only funny thing about the book was the title. The cover was mildly amusing. The book is a collection of stories of events that occured to the author, Stefanie Wilder-Taylor. Funny is not a description to be used in describing her memories. I do find it somewhat amusing that people actually bought this book. I am only glad I did not read this book outdoors for I would have taken a sharp stick to my eye to ease the pain. Do not waste your time reading this book.

[Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a super-quick read. It's just essays but I grew to love the author as the book develops. This was better than her book Sippy Cups Are Not For Chardonnay.

[Charleen · Rating 4 out of 5]

[u]The Tough Decisions in Life[/u]

How do you escape when your boyfriend is kinda keeping you hostage? You channel your inner Tori Spelling.
You need a car and your parents won't help you out, what do you do? You win one at Hollywood Squares.
You are at a shelter because your mother kicked you out of the house, what do you do? Rally up all the kids at the shelter and pass a petition for more T.V. time.

Hilarious!

This book had me laughing out loud in the middle of the gym. Yes, I got a few stares. I took it to the beach and I was laughing so hard, my friends were thoroughly amused.

This book, written by Stefanie Wilder-Taylor, is a collection of short essays or vignettes that chronicle certain events in her life such as: moving to L.A., being dropped off at a shelter by her mother, meeting her future husband online, and throwing a tantrum because her boyfriend won't marry her. They are not told in any specific order and the disjointed arrangement of the chapters fits the book perfectly. This book is extremely subjective, uniquely honest, and hugely entertaining. I like this book so much, I want to hang out with the author.

The book deals with the ups and downs of her life in a very funny way. I would, at times, realize that what was happening was not a funny thing (being kicked out of her house, her numerous relationships, her self-destructive ways, eating disorders, and estranged relationship with her father) but she has a way with words that I could not stop laughing. The last chapter took a more serious tone, amidst all the funny references, that seemed to project the author's own transformation into a semi-responsible adult.

This was a fast read and extremely enjoyable. I can't wait for another of her books, there are too many stages of her life that are missing from this one.

This is a book to get.

[Peebee · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm not sure why I keep reading these humorous memoirs -- I think mostly to validate that there are crazier people than me out there who still manage to survive in the world. This was one of the better ones, though...it wasn't over-the-top funny, but I appreciated that she wasn't always trying to be over-the-top funny and failing, like many of these books. (Are you listening, Laurie Notaro?)

[Kelly · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a very funny book! The timeline jumped around a bit much, but her humorous stories of her life whether that be real or made up, kept me laughing the whole book through. It really made me feel better about my own life!

[Kerry · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a laugh out loud one! A bunch of short autobiographical short stories that are friggen funny! Like the time she "accidentally free-based cocaine" or when they kind of joined a cult to get the free food. haha. It's a good one!

[Samm · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was funny (if you have a sarcastic sense of humor) and there were also a lot of sad parts throughout. It kept me interested the whole time reading it.

[Shaida Hossein · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good, but definitely wasn't as humorous as I first anticipated. I would be interested in reading some of her other novels (particularly Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay and Naptime Is the New Happy Hour). Don't get me wrong, she had humor nestled into her stories, but for me it wasn't a slap-stick kind of humor but rather it provided comic relief. This book has a bunch of short stories that are basically in chronological order of her life. A lot of the short stories involved some heavy storylines involving estranged parents, difficulties of living in LA as a teenager, drugs, dating, and the pressures of getting married. There are several funny quotations from the stories, but the book was definitely a lot more intense and dramatic. If I had to break it down, I would say it was 75% drama and 25% comedy. Even though I was disappointed in the overall tone of the book, the stories did keep my interest. This is a short book that has a lot to offer a reader, but for me, it just didn't amuse me as much as I anticipated.

[Mamatulip · Rating 3 out of 5]

Quite funny; great narrative voice with an enviable wit.

[Natashi · Rating 4 out of 5]

definitely interesting. sortof reminds me of Bitter Is the New Black

[Laurie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious!

[Lawillett · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very easy read. Short essays make it a book that is easy to find a stopping point. This book made me crack up at times. I look forward to reading her other books!

[Carrie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Made me laugh - which is exactly what I needed on a dreary January day in Illinois.

[Nicole · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fast, easy funny read.

[Lindsay · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good book, fun, but slightly disconnected.

[Rachel Weis · Rating 3 out of 5]

Light hearted and very entertaining. It held my attention and kept me coming back for more.

[Leslie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hilarious. Lots of fun. One of those books where you bug the person you are traveling with so you can read a chapter to them.

[Monica Lee · Rating 3 out of 5]

Author Stefanie Wilder-Taylor writes her memoir like I would like to write one: Filled with sarcasm, humor and obscenities.

I’m just too Minnesota Nice to pull it off courageously. And not nearly as funny.

But if you’re a memoir fan looking for a humor fix, “It’s Not Me, It’s You: Subjective Recollections From a Terminally Optimistic, Chronically Sarcastic and Occasionally Inebriated Woman” is your book.

It is not as packed with laugh-out-loud humorous metaphors as Jen Lancaster’s “Bitter Is the New Black: Confessions of a Condescending, Egomaniacal, Self-Centered Smartass, Or, Why You Should Never Carry A Prada Bag to the Unemployment Office” (a book I thoroughly enjoyed by the way), but Wilder-Taylor’s writing reminded me a bit of Lancaster’s and it’s got enough funny to preoccupy me while I spent hours (seemed like it anyway) on the stepmill at the gym.

Wilder-Taylor’s chapters are a little bit disconnected in the beginning, but her storytelling gets better as the book progresses and I found myself cheering for her by the end.

[Kathryn · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a very quick read. It's supposed to be amusing and she doesn't pull it off as well as Jen Lancaster, although I did lol once or twice. Stefanie Wilder-Taylor definitely has a sense of humor and it's served her well, but I couldn't help but feel bad at some parts. Her tale of travelling to Hollywood to start her own life and the predicaments she lands in are at times amusing, but there are also times that I cannot believe her upbringing, and it's not funny. Her parents are, without a doubt, the most miserable excuse for parents I've ever heard. Sure Stefanie was challenging, but they did not serve her well at all.

I haven't read her other books, but if I were a newer mother, meaning had more recently had babies, I think her other titles would be 4 stars for sure, maybe 5. She's witty and funny - so if you're new to motherhood, check them out!

[Leila T. · Rating 2 out of 5]

This felt less like a memoir and more like a collection of vignettes. It does have funny moments, and it is definitely light-hearted and a little surprising and crazy. I started reading it when I had kind of reached my limit for the time being with a different, very serious book I'm reading, and it definitely provided the levity I was seeking. So I accepted it for what it was, and honestly I liked it for doing what I needed it to do. But I had problems with some of the viewpoints, and I noticed several instances of bad editing, including the omission of the word "cake" in this sentence on page 118: "if my memory serves me correctly, someone may have baked him a congratulations-on-kicking-Stefanie's-ass during the time between our scores being announced and our arrival backstage."

[Rebecca · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was a compilation of little stories, which is probably one of my favorite ways of reading stuff, especially if it's boring. This was not boring, but it was still a good book. They were true little stories about the authors life, sort of funny stuff too. It was supposed to be funny but I probably only laughed out loud like twice as some of the stories were a little annoying. I know, I am all over the place with this. The good: everything was like 10 easy pages to read. The down: not in chronological order and the women, who seemed really independent and feministic was like obsessed with getting married, especially once she met some dude (who of course she ended up marrying). The funny just wasn't really my style, but I can see how it could be someones. Just not me.

Grade: C

[Lisa · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was funny, but it also sort of drove me crazy because it made me want to shake the girl writing it. I'm sure she was exaggerating to make things funnier, but all the stories about her getting fired from a crazy number of jobs and basically making a mess of her life just made me want to fix her. Which is ridiculous, and probably says something about my own life, especially because it's similar to hers in its level of ridiculousness. This reminded me of the Chelsea Handler book I read awhile back, and I had the same feelings about that. Yeah, your life is funny, but Jesus, you could have avoided some of this shit if you'd just used some common sense! Again, maybe I just related a little bit too much to the subject?

[Katherine P · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've read Wilder-Taylor's first 2 books - Sippy Cups are Not for Chardonnay and Naptime is the New Happy Hour. I loved the first one and felt like the second was trying to hard to be as good as the first one. I was a little nervous that this book would be a repeat of the second book. It definitely wasn't. In this book she delves into her abandonment issues, unhappy childhood, eating disorder and other pretty serious things and all with a pretty amazing ability to laugh at herself. This book isn't laugh out loud funny with every page but it is humorous and to me came off as honest. It was a fast read and I'm definitely going to read her next book.

[Jean · Rating 1 out of 5]

Her first two books were brilliantly hilarious. I related to her funny experiences with new motherhood and the way she told her stories made me pee-in-my-pants laugh. In this book, instead of sticking with the topic of motherhood, it's a hodge-podge of recollections of growing up. Unfortuately, I couldn't relate to her stories of getting kicked out of the house by her mother at 16; smoking crack; hanging out at titty bars and strip-clubs; and begging her boyfriend to marry her. Quite disappointing.

[Crystal Chm · Rating 5 out of 5]

Moving and funny, I loved this book. I will highly recommend to my friends to read as I found it easy to relate to. It Works for You if You Work It was my favorite chapter where she discusses how therapy will not work unless you give it a chance. Unlike other memoirs I've read in the past that focus on comedy, she mixes in with the humor her emotional past that in a way that is endearing and raw. I also enjoyed how the book get better, and the writer more likable, as the stories progress, since some books I've read before start off well and drag towards the end.

[Erica Okane · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book, however it wasnt quite as funny as the other 2 books I have read by her. But that may just be because I couldnt really relate to alot of the stuff in her life. Which isnt a bad thing, its just funnier if youve been there done that. There were parts that were just plain hilarious, and parts that just were ok. It jumped around a bit, going from when she was 18, then to meeting her husband, and back to being in her early 20s. Overall though, I enjoyed it and will be ordering her next book when it is released next week.

[Chelsea · Rating 3 out of 5]

Fairly amusing although I couldn't relate to most of the circumstances. Many people didn't like the ending as it was a little open-ended, but I felt like her whole point was that life is all about how you perceive it and it never hurts to have a "rock" in your life (the word she uses for her husband in her acknowledgements). The story didn't really need a neat and tidy ending because life is ever-evolving and rarely neat or tidy. It left me intrigued enough to check out another book by Wilder-Taylor.

[Stefanie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Pros:
Written by a girl named Stefanie. Goodreads does not have her name properly listed. As someone named Stefanie I admit I picked it up at first because I adore seeing my name in print.

One chapter stories are perfect for when you're not quite prepared to concentrate. Seeing as I carried a 102 degree fever for 50+ hours, that's about all I could handle.

Some parts were wicked funny.

Cons:

Some parts were not even close to being believable.

Making light of drug use is not funny to me.

[JH · Rating 4 out of 5]

This memoir was funny, and I definitely wanted to be friends with Stefanie Wilder-Taylor. Her insecurities and discomforts are ones many of us can relate to, although we might handle them a little differently.

She is blunt and open about her issues, although I did want to see a little more of her struggle due to her irresponsible behavior. For example, she needs a car so she goes on a game show to win one, then conveniently ignores the fact that she will be taxed by the IRS on said car, which leads to years of uncomfortable debt (glossed over).

Regardless, a quick and funny read.