We Have Not Stopped Trembling Yet: Letters to My Filipino-Athabascan Family

by E.J.R. David

A father’s personal and intimate account of his Filipino and Alaska Native family’s experiences, and his search for how to help his children overcome the effects of historical and contemporary oppression.

In a series of letters to his mixed-race Koyukon Athabascan family, E. J. R. David shares his struggles, insecurities, and anxieties as a Filipino American immigrant man, husband, and father living in the lands dominated by his family’s colonizer. The result is We Have Not Stopped Trembling Yet, a deeply personal and heartfelt exploration of the intersections and widespread social, psychological, and health implications of colonialism, immigration, racism, sexism, intergenerational trauma, and internalized oppression. Weaving together his lived realities, his family’s experiences, and empirical data, David reflects on a difficult journey, touching upon the importance of developing critical and painful consciousness, as well as the need for connectedness, strength, freedom, and love, in our personal and collective efforts to heal from the injuries of historical and contemporary oppression. The persecution of two marginalized communities is brought to the forefrontin this book. Their histories underscore and reveal how historical and contemporary oppression has very real and tangible impacts on Peoples across time and generations.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, History, Indigenous, Academic

200 pages, Paperback

First published February 1, 2018

Reviews

[Gerie · Rating 5 out of 5]

People talk about being “woke” and I think I’ve only recently been aware of my work towards this state of being. Reading this book has helped me take a step closer. It’s named some feelings and experiences with my ancestors that I haven’t been able to describe on my own. It’s explained “kapwa” to this Filipino American woman who never learned how to speak her parent’s filipino dialects. Knowing about kapwa will help me explain my intentions to others when I want to share and explain my personal story. For all these reasons I thank Dr. E.J. David for this book.

“I lost my kapwa—my indigenous core value. It means fellow being. It is the essence of Filipino personhood, of being human. In kapwa, we are all on the same level, we are all equal, and we are all connected. Kapwa means shared inner self; it is how one exists in the other, and how the other exists in one.” (p.26)

[Susan Halvor · Rating 5 out of 5]

E.J.R. David's letters to various members of his Filipino-Athabascan family are sobering and thoughtful reflections, grounded in stark statistics about life in the United States and in Alaska for those who are Alaska Native, Filipino, Native American, mixed-race, female, male ... the legacy of colonialism is a legacy of violence and suffering.

And he also notes this, to his daughter: "...I still want you to live in this world and experience its many beauties. I still want you to get your shot at making this world a better place. Because I believe in you. Because despite the 'risk factors' and the undesirables, I also see the protective factors and the awesome things about our Peoples. I also see the resilience factors; I see what makes us strong and fierce. I wanted you to live in this world because I still see that our Peoples have plenty to contribute to heal this world, and the contributions and healing can come through you."

Both bleak and hopeful, this is an important book. I learned a lot, much of which I should have already known. Looking forward to sharing it with others.

[B Zimp · Rating 3 out of 5]

Wow this was a heavy, but important read. From a Filipino professor, writing to his Alaska Native Athabascan wife and children. Encompassing their cultural history, how the world perceives them, and his future wishes for our society to change and improve. Written in chapter chunks, so it's easier to take in and process the important wisdom.

[Joclyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Written in 2016/17 by UAA professor and wow, eerie to be reading this during election 8 years later. It’s sad but so important, and I’m glad to have the perspective he offers.

[Cee San Luis · Rating 1 out of 5]

I’m sorry but I couldn’t finish it. It is truly awful to experience loss, shame, and grief for transgressions throughout history put on Natives and Filipinos. But to slide into victimhood and sit there we only harbor this pain and fear into our lives and it permeates. We need solutions, discussions, tangible ways that empower each other. Celebration of our Filipino and Native cultures whatever they may be and embracing the need to share and educate others. Yes alongside that is an intersection of our history where colonizers stomped and murdered and plundered and took so much, but as we acknowledge and grapple with that pain we also must have pride and love for who we are in our identity.

[Megan]

I learned some things about Filipino culture and history. I appreciated the author's openness and authenticity.

I was slightly disappointed that while the final chapter was addressed to his family's "roots", it really was a letter to his family about their roots. I'd have been interested to read a letter truly written to his roots, which to me is a more interesting (and slightly less repetitive) conceit. That said, this is his book, and these are his letters. They're not written to me, so my preference isn't really relevant.