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American Drug Addict: A Memoir
My name is Brett. I’m a college educated man who was once a husband of 26 years with two children, three businesses, and a large home with an actual white picket fence. I’m also a drug addict. And I have a tale to tell. My story has sex, death, pain, atheism, God, jail, marriage, divorce, heresy, homosexuality, physics, traffic fatalities, computer science, video games, cinnamon toothpicks, Barry Manilow, Nine Inch Nails, pornography, breasts, used tampons, strippers, venereal disease, abortion, prostitutes, AIDS, racism, suicide, infidelity, public nudity, anti-Semitism, marijuana, alcohol, pawn shops, drug dealers, needles, acid, ecstasy, crack, heroin, pain pills, withdrawal, interventions, rehabs, product tampering, road rage, vandalism, elderly abuse, grave desecration, arson, identity theft, burglary, armed robbery, and murder. But more importantly, it’s about the despair of addiction and the absolute certainty that it can be overcome. Recovery is not simply abstinence, but a process of growing up. I spent my entire life searching for the key to long-term sobriety. I would like to share with you what I have learned
422 pages, Kindle Edition
First published March 27, 2018
1460 people are currently reading
1725 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 231 reviews
September 15, 2017
In many respects I wanted to give this book 1 star, on the flip-side of the coin I also wanted to give it 5 stars. The reason I have gone middle of the road is because, if in fact you are an addict in recovery, you need to read this book. If you are not-then do not, it will depress the hell out of you unnecessarily.
As a recovering alcoholic there is much in this depiction of addiction and supposed recovery I do disagree with. For instance this line- "alcohol is a drug, and alcoholics are drug addicts." While I do agree alcohol is indeed a drug, an alcoholic and a drug addict are two completely different "animals." They are not one in the same.
Yes a person can be addicted to both drugs and alcohol simultaneously, yet that is where the similarities end. Both in the addiction and the recovery. This may sound like an oxymoron yet I can assure you there is a huge difference.
Having said that , there are so many points in this book that made me take a damn good hard look at my own recovery as compared to this mans concept of such.
The authors interpretation of the twelve steps, although somewhat skewed in my interpretation is a sound one, yet again- every single person in recovery will have their own interpretation of what the meanings of those steps are.
I found this book very offensive on so many levels, yet I also have used it for my own gain as a reassurance of my own resolve within my continued recovery process and would definitely recommend it to anyone in the process of recovery.
Be forewarned though, I was "triggered" many times while reading this book.
As a recovering alcoholic there is much in this depiction of addiction and supposed recovery I do disagree with. For instance this line- "alcohol is a drug, and alcoholics are drug addicts." While I do agree alcohol is indeed a drug, an alcoholic and a drug addict are two completely different "animals." They are not one in the same.
Yes a person can be addicted to both drugs and alcohol simultaneously, yet that is where the similarities end. Both in the addiction and the recovery. This may sound like an oxymoron yet I can assure you there is a huge difference.
Having said that , there are so many points in this book that made me take a damn good hard look at my own recovery as compared to this mans concept of such.
The authors interpretation of the twelve steps, although somewhat skewed in my interpretation is a sound one, yet again- every single person in recovery will have their own interpretation of what the meanings of those steps are.
I found this book very offensive on so many levels, yet I also have used it for my own gain as a reassurance of my own resolve within my continued recovery process and would definitely recommend it to anyone in the process of recovery.
Be forewarned though, I was "triggered" many times while reading this book.
September 30, 2022
Not my type of humor or way of looking at the world.
March 14, 2018
As someone who had lived with a drug addict for many years in my early 20’s I always gravitate towards books like this. To try and understand and perhaps open my mind further to how their behaviour becomes so destructive. It’s hard to read how drugs can trump everything but at the same time it offers relief in a way that there was nothing else I could have done to help the person I lived with. The book itself was brilliant, well written, fast paced and entertaining while also being miserable and frustrating. Hah! It’s hard not to hate drug addicts who lie, steal, cheat and cause their loved ones immeasurable pain, but books like this go a long way to understanding why they do it!
August 23, 2017
Strange Book...
The book kept my interest, although it seemed unusual to read a humorous book about addiction and recovery. In my opinion, Douglas romanticized his drug use, and practically bragged about it, throughout the entire book, as if those were the "old glory days". Yet, those addiction filled days are not at all that far in the past and only ended due to his incarceration, which he referred to as a "vacation". The book was written to kill time during a prison sentence, and the ending concludes upon his release. He spouted off a lot of addiction and recovery jargon, but nothing leads me to believe he's actually in recovery or truly comprehends what it even means to be in recovery. What makes this time any different? What it seems like to me is that he needed a paycheck after his release, so he wrote a book. I also found him to be a racist with a huge ego.
The book kept my interest, although it seemed unusual to read a humorous book about addiction and recovery. In my opinion, Douglas romanticized his drug use, and practically bragged about it, throughout the entire book, as if those were the "old glory days". Yet, those addiction filled days are not at all that far in the past and only ended due to his incarceration, which he referred to as a "vacation". The book was written to kill time during a prison sentence, and the ending concludes upon his release. He spouted off a lot of addiction and recovery jargon, but nothing leads me to believe he's actually in recovery or truly comprehends what it even means to be in recovery. What makes this time any different? What it seems like to me is that he needed a paycheck after his release, so he wrote a book. I also found him to be a racist with a huge ego.
March 13, 2025
What a wild ride. Hopefully he stayed clean. Goes to show that an addict doesn't think of anyone or any consequences.
August 16, 2018
Brett is a total dirtbag.
This book was written by a drug addict in recovery. It is a jaw-dropping story chock-full of people who cared about him whom he mercilessly screwed over (including his parents, children, wife, and best friend) and tale after tale of why Brett should be dead.
This book is not uplifting. It’s a very ugly look at the daily life of a drug addict with honest insight into why people stay in that lifestyle. This guy loved drugs, and everything that went hand-in-hand with being an addict. You will lose all respect for Brett. He does a lot of evil, underhanded shit and some of it caught up with him. There are soul-searching moments and revelations that will make you hopeful that Brett does have some humanity left, and there are some very funny moments. My favorite line in the book is when Brett attempts Step 4 of the 12 Steps for the first time and only comes up with a page. His sponsor, Don, a grumpy older guy with no time for bullshit looks at it and says, “You’ve only got one page? You’re fucked up.” Then there is the rest of the book where Brett comes off as a narcissistic, self-indulgent, elitist asshole who lies incessantly and makes it hard for you to feel any empathy for him at all.
The redeeming qualities of the book are that it includes an excellent description of having a sense of gratitude for everything as your higher power for those who are atheistic or agnostic, and Brett’s bottom line—if he can recover from addiction, anyone can. This book is a wild ride.
I’d give this book two stars for the bits where the author brags at length about his sexual exploits and intelligence in screwing over other people. He gets a one-star rating for being a sexist and racist pig. I’d give him four stars his actual story, which is well-written. I am 100% certain he only wrote this book to make money, so I sincerely hope he’s using his profits to pay back his children and his parents.
This book was written by a drug addict in recovery. It is a jaw-dropping story chock-full of people who cared about him whom he mercilessly screwed over (including his parents, children, wife, and best friend) and tale after tale of why Brett should be dead.
This book is not uplifting. It’s a very ugly look at the daily life of a drug addict with honest insight into why people stay in that lifestyle. This guy loved drugs, and everything that went hand-in-hand with being an addict. You will lose all respect for Brett. He does a lot of evil, underhanded shit and some of it caught up with him. There are soul-searching moments and revelations that will make you hopeful that Brett does have some humanity left, and there are some very funny moments. My favorite line in the book is when Brett attempts Step 4 of the 12 Steps for the first time and only comes up with a page. His sponsor, Don, a grumpy older guy with no time for bullshit looks at it and says, “You’ve only got one page? You’re fucked up.” Then there is the rest of the book where Brett comes off as a narcissistic, self-indulgent, elitist asshole who lies incessantly and makes it hard for you to feel any empathy for him at all.
The redeeming qualities of the book are that it includes an excellent description of having a sense of gratitude for everything as your higher power for those who are atheistic or agnostic, and Brett’s bottom line—if he can recover from addiction, anyone can. This book is a wild ride.
I’d give this book two stars for the bits where the author brags at length about his sexual exploits and intelligence in screwing over other people. He gets a one-star rating for being a sexist and racist pig. I’d give him four stars his actual story, which is well-written. I am 100% certain he only wrote this book to make money, so I sincerely hope he’s using his profits to pay back his children and his parents.
February 28, 2022
A memoir of a drug addict who carries you through his childhood, into his discovery of drugs, and the after effects of this decision.
There were so many times I said, "this guy is a piece of shit" and there are several times the author says the same thing in less words. He understands his mistakes, faults, and darkest desires and decided to write a book about it.
I enjoyed his honesty without sugar coating anything. I liked how I hated him during so many moments. I liked how he took you through all the highs and lows of a drug addict and took you along his thought process. The author is self-aware and his analysis of himself and what drugs do to him has brought a different understanding to light of what it is to be a drug addict.
I would recommend this book to those looking for less of a self-help and more of a gritty, detailed account of a drug addict.
There were so many times I said, "this guy is a piece of shit" and there are several times the author says the same thing in less words. He understands his mistakes, faults, and darkest desires and decided to write a book about it.
I enjoyed his honesty without sugar coating anything. I liked how I hated him during so many moments. I liked how he took you through all the highs and lows of a drug addict and took you along his thought process. The author is self-aware and his analysis of himself and what drugs do to him has brought a different understanding to light of what it is to be a drug addict.
I would recommend this book to those looking for less of a self-help and more of a gritty, detailed account of a drug addict.
January 9, 2019
I can’t tell you how many times, while reading this book, I thought, “This guy is a total a**hole!” It is a long vomiting confession of all his a**hole ways and actions. The person he wrote about (which is supposedly in his past) is quite deplorable and I wanted to stop reading it many times. It doesn’t get better... but he ends it clean, so hopefully he redeems his life and lives right.
It’s awful to know people like he and Paula are raising kids out there. Damn.
Another reviewer said the book was triggering- I agree -it will bring up emotion for sure!
It’s awful to know people like he and Paula are raising kids out there. Damn.
Another reviewer said the book was triggering- I agree -it will bring up emotion for sure!
February 18, 2018
Honesty is best.
Ive always read self help and addiction memiors. While sitting in court, awaiting my lawyer, this book popped up on my 'related' reads. Since it was 3 bucks, shit, why not? I recently found myself hit my current rock bottom and started AA, so without reading too much into what it was about I downloaded it. 3 days prior I had conversations with friends of religious aspects of AA, and how that would inevitably push me out of it but that for now it was OK... this book sums up alot of how I was dealing to cope with that shit. This man took an incredibly sad journey through life, but came out with the right way of thinking. Great book.
Ive always read self help and addiction memiors. While sitting in court, awaiting my lawyer, this book popped up on my 'related' reads. Since it was 3 bucks, shit, why not? I recently found myself hit my current rock bottom and started AA, so without reading too much into what it was about I downloaded it. 3 days prior I had conversations with friends of religious aspects of AA, and how that would inevitably push me out of it but that for now it was OK... this book sums up alot of how I was dealing to cope with that shit. This man took an incredibly sad journey through life, but came out with the right way of thinking. Great book.
February 16, 2019
I was too disgusted by the author to get much out of the book. Also didn’t like the narration for some reason. Author rhapsodizes about women’s breasts. Thinks it’s hilarious when his girlfriend yells the n-word in a neighborhood of African-Americans. Disparages a Jewish man while under the influence. And explains that when he uses the term “faggot” he doesn’t mean homosexuals (in fact brags about how many gay friends he has.) Here’s an idea: don’t use the term at all. I thought the author was a sexist bigot who thought far too well of himself. I’m getting my credit back from Audible.
December 24, 2021
Purely as a piece of entertainment this gets 3.8 Stars. However, the author is deplorable. That has nothing to do with with drug use, just him as a person. This book, read like a book of fiction, is really good. But it is a real struggle to read what this person has done to people and hearing him being naive about his obvious misogyny and racism. A very conflicting book.
November 21, 2017
if you think your story is worth telling, consider investing in an editor. i couldn't slog through last 2/3 because of grammar and punctuation issues. don't waste your money.
March 18, 2024
Story was good but author is unbearable
July 21, 2017
This book is horrible. The author is deplorable and someone any normal person would not want to be around.
June 6, 2025
oh wow. This may be the saddest book I have ever read. Such a raw piece of nonfiction that made me really think. I couldn’t stop reading it, the pages just seemed to turn themselves. if I could give this book 10 stars I would. One of my new favorites.
October 23, 2020
Seared into the pages of American Drug Addict is an ugly, in-your-face confessional for our times, from a broken man at the end of his rope. While in jail, Brett Douglas procured some prison paper, picked up a golf pencil, and began to write. With brutal, unflinching candor befitting his circumstance, he lay bare his tattered soul. The same soul he thought he’d sold long ago.
And so begins a 385-page, fearless moral self-inventory, which some may recognize as the fourth of AA’s twelve steps. Well-written, raw and visceral, Douglas’s memoir serves as a gripping reminder of addiction’s insidious allure and how precious—and precarious—is our humanity, warts and all.
As life begins for the author, we feel the love both from and for his grandparents, ‘Meemaw’ and ‘Pawpaw,’ who played leading roles in his childhood. It’s right there, in full view of his family’s dysfunction that defiles the soil where addiction’s dirty seeds take root. Brett’s a nice kid most of the time. A bit rowdy, he’s a part-time punk and occasional a-hole. But the die is not cast. It could go either way.
Weighing his options at the cusp of independence, a teenage Brett sees the world through a lens blurred by innocence and marred during childhood. He’s successful enough to afford drugs and indulge his desires, but too cocksure to indulge his ignorance. Lacking the maturity to perceive the potential he squanders daily, his long, downward spiral begins as youthful adventure. Experimentation gives way to escape, and we see the snare silently sprung long before a naïve Brett is aware of the trap he set for himself. Exhilarated by the rush and the risk, drug use infects his identity:
One of the most candid and heart wrenching books I have read on the disease of addiction. Brett is painfully honest in describing the hellish life that goes along with addiction. I highly recommend this book to anyone who is struggling, as well as anyone who has a loved one caught in the grips of drug or alcohol abuse.
I loved the style of writing and the brutal honesty in this book. I'm glad the book ended the way it did, because from the grim lows the autobiography described, it could have easily ended a different way. Kudos to Brett
And so begins a 385-page, fearless moral self-inventory, which some may recognize as the fourth of AA’s twelve steps. Well-written, raw and visceral, Douglas’s memoir serves as a gripping reminder of addiction’s insidious allure and how precious—and precarious—is our humanity, warts and all.
As life begins for the author, we feel the love both from and for his grandparents, ‘Meemaw’ and ‘Pawpaw,’ who played leading roles in his childhood. It’s right there, in full view of his family’s dysfunction that defiles the soil where addiction’s dirty seeds take root. Brett’s a nice kid most of the time. A bit rowdy, he’s a part-time punk and occasional a-hole. But the die is not cast. It could go either way.
Weighing his options at the cusp of independence, a teenage Brett sees the world through a lens blurred by innocence and marred during childhood. He’s successful enough to afford drugs and indulge his desires, but too cocksure to indulge his ignorance. Lacking the maturity to perceive the potential he squanders daily, his long, downward spiral begins as youthful adventure. Experimentation gives way to escape, and we see the snare silently sprung long before a naïve Brett is aware of the trap he set for himself. Exhilarated by the rush and the risk, drug use infects his identity:
One of the most candid and heart wrenching books I have read on the disease of addiction. Brett is painfully honest in describing the hellish life that goes along with addiction. I highly recommend this book to anyone who is struggling, as well as anyone who has a loved one caught in the grips of drug or alcohol abuse.
I loved the style of writing and the brutal honesty in this book. I'm glad the book ended the way it did, because from the grim lows the autobiography described, it could have easily ended a different way. Kudos to Brett
June 18, 2023
I'm torn on this one. I honestly couldn't put this down - so I guess if that is how you judge a "good" book, then this one was pretty good.
But.....
During the events of this book - and I also think during the writing of this book, Brett is not a good person at all, in fact I started to dislike him immensely as the book progressed. He's a horrible person.
But the book is exactly what it's about. It's an accurate portrait of a drug addict - and that is a dirty, shitty, horrible topic to read about.
I would be interested in seeing if Brett wrote this book again after 15 years of sobriety, how much it would differ. Assuming he really did write this book while incarcerated, it would explain the chip he has on his shoulder. He constantly tries to hammer home how smart he assumes he is. How many degrees he somehow got. The amount of money he was making. His "opinions" on things. His tone on this entire book is one that still doesn't seem to care how his actions effect the lives of those close to him. He still seems "proud" of a lot of his party and drug stories - and I find that a bit fucked up still.
But.....
During the events of this book - and I also think during the writing of this book, Brett is not a good person at all, in fact I started to dislike him immensely as the book progressed. He's a horrible person.
But the book is exactly what it's about. It's an accurate portrait of a drug addict - and that is a dirty, shitty, horrible topic to read about.
I would be interested in seeing if Brett wrote this book again after 15 years of sobriety, how much it would differ. Assuming he really did write this book while incarcerated, it would explain the chip he has on his shoulder. He constantly tries to hammer home how smart he assumes he is. How many degrees he somehow got. The amount of money he was making. His "opinions" on things. His tone on this entire book is one that still doesn't seem to care how his actions effect the lives of those close to him. He still seems "proud" of a lot of his party and drug stories - and I find that a bit fucked up still.
October 1, 2017
Harrowing and brave.
This book trashes a lot of stereotypes about who addicts are, and that's important if we as a society ever want to stop judging and truly help people. There's a lot of unflinching reporting of awful things here, a thorough inventory if you will, and sometimes it seems a little voyeuristic to read. Brett Douglas is also sometimes very funny, though, and the gallows humour shows the self-awareness that he's gained on his journey. Also, this may seem superfluous, but I appreciate the musical selections he's chosen.
This book trashes a lot of stereotypes about who addicts are, and that's important if we as a society ever want to stop judging and truly help people. There's a lot of unflinching reporting of awful things here, a thorough inventory if you will, and sometimes it seems a little voyeuristic to read. Brett Douglas is also sometimes very funny, though, and the gallows humour shows the self-awareness that he's gained on his journey. Also, this may seem superfluous, but I appreciate the musical selections he's chosen.
November 7, 2017
Brutality honest memoir on drug addiction
As they say you gotta hit rock bottom before you wake the f#ck up. Well for Brett it seems he hit a few times. This book is a good read for all the people who don't understand a drug addicts struggles. They may have a little better understanding and learn from his addiction. As for Brett Douglas one day at a time. Everyday is a new day.
As they say you gotta hit rock bottom before you wake the f#ck up. Well for Brett it seems he hit a few times. This book is a good read for all the people who don't understand a drug addicts struggles. They may have a little better understanding and learn from his addiction. As for Brett Douglas one day at a time. Everyday is a new day.
January 4, 2020
Despite the grisly allure of listening to a confessional tell-all of this sort, this memoir lacks humility and true self-reflection. He is a braggart, and his writing is riddled with misogynistic and bigoted statements that made it impossible for me to commiserate with the consequences of the s***storm that he brings onto himself at every turn.
Still, I listened through to the end, so if you're twisted like me and enjoy reading about human trainwrecks, there's that.
Still, I listened through to the end, so if you're twisted like me and enjoy reading about human trainwrecks, there's that.
July 31, 2023
FREE on Audible.Like if Patrick Bateman became a drug addict instead of a serial killer, as the conceit of the book is that looks are deceiving. The narrator is even named Bret like the American Psycho author, has a similar voice, inflection, and both have dads named Robert. Ironic fun though this is a memoir that goes in chronological order. Usually, childhood is the most boring part of autobios but Bret’s stuffy yet hippie parents are a site to behold, along with his mailbox-decimating antics. Him and his buddies even steal vending machines and headstones as room decor. The tone is curse-riddled with a comedian’s cadence.
Bret had a punk band called Vomit, with songs like Crippled F’king Freaks” and he sells weed out of hollowed bibles. When he’s very young, he finds white powder in his uncle’s boots and that kickstarts his hypersexualization. He claims this is confined to relationships and simple boob obsession. 😛. One of his first girlfriends gets him into IV heroin and coke. His first and best job is Applebees, where he makes many gay friends to do ecstasy with. One of his fellow pervert girlfriends hangs out with him after he gets fired for underage drinking, when a drunk driver hits them. It kills her and keeps his jaw wired shut for months. This keeps him somewhat clean but one night he goes to a party when his parents are away.
There, he drinks until he pukes, almost drowning to death in the chunks. Even though he was already shooting coke, having his mouth sewn shut has him lose another 50 pounds. Sick of eating sweet and sour soup for every meal, his new solace becomes a Domino’s pizza he has to cut into microscopic bites. His new girlfriend becomes his worst influence, allegedly after his family’s money for owning a pawn shop—and she shoots meth. She, like most people in his life, are able to easily sober up pretty easily. Him? He resorts to lor-tabs while his son is born. That’s not to say he’s not very productive, an affectionate father who builds his own home from the ground up (w/ bribes of fancy alcohol, but still). Since his wife is a nurse, she nonchalantly helps him clean needles and steal OxyContin. He skims $10k a month out of the family’s pawn shop and they barely notice, that’s how successful they are.
He gets too friendly w/ a stripper as delusional as him to the point she moves nextdoor to taunt his wife and beg him to marry her instead. He’s able to escape that unscathed but not so lucky when IVing 30 oxies a day. His family catches on (his children none the wiser until he’s arrested by a cop he kicked out of his shop before for being a b!tch). Instead of turning his life around intentionally, he’s court-ordered into rehab, where he hits it off with a spunky crack addict who could doppelgäng for Fran Drescher. Honestly, the infidelity seems his most forgivable offense since his wife seems to have loathed him pre-marriage, especially since she misses being doped up too.
Jailed for romantically evading rehab with his new amour, he runs into more failed AA members. He actually turns to god in an abstract way, relying on gratitude for still being alive. Once he’s free, he’s calmly in recovery by himself for a yr but his wife is using again. They’re always in reverse so, one night, she steals thousands of dollars from his business and thinks about running away but she changes her mind at the last second. She says they don’t have to get the divorce he wants, she’ll get clean ‘cause the kids need a better home life. But maintaining all this and a failing business is too much to bear.
No longer separated, Bret and his wife start doing crack and heroin more than ever. Though they rarely miss mortgage payments or things like that, their relationship leads to much more isolation, coke psychosis, and suicide attempts. His hallucinations are a message to stop lest he wanna materialize the funerals and death rattles of family, but he doesn’t get the memo until most of them desert him, and he winds up in jail again, where he writes this. His recovery is brief and he admits potentially ephemeral but he has to take it one day at a time. Or a few years on the straight and narrow are better than none. He attributes getting clean to incarceration and the grace of god. It’s a pretty good thing he doesn’t get much into it recovery because so many memoirs drag that out and I’ve never seen any of them articulate the process in an entertaining or gradual way. Or they sermonize unbelievable cliches for a hundred pages like the Prozac Nation chick did. This is leagues better. Darkly hilarious and always with consistent but unique takes. Sure, there could've been more about the kids and how he kept the lid on affairs, but maybe that was out of respect for privacy or potential defamation 'suits.
Bret had a punk band called Vomit, with songs like Crippled F’king Freaks” and he sells weed out of hollowed bibles. When he’s very young, he finds white powder in his uncle’s boots and that kickstarts his hypersexualization. He claims this is confined to relationships and simple boob obsession. 😛. One of his first girlfriends gets him into IV heroin and coke. His first and best job is Applebees, where he makes many gay friends to do ecstasy with. One of his fellow pervert girlfriends hangs out with him after he gets fired for underage drinking, when a drunk driver hits them. It kills her and keeps his jaw wired shut for months. This keeps him somewhat clean but one night he goes to a party when his parents are away.
There, he drinks until he pukes, almost drowning to death in the chunks. Even though he was already shooting coke, having his mouth sewn shut has him lose another 50 pounds. Sick of eating sweet and sour soup for every meal, his new solace becomes a Domino’s pizza he has to cut into microscopic bites. His new girlfriend becomes his worst influence, allegedly after his family’s money for owning a pawn shop—and she shoots meth. She, like most people in his life, are able to easily sober up pretty easily. Him? He resorts to lor-tabs while his son is born. That’s not to say he’s not very productive, an affectionate father who builds his own home from the ground up (w/ bribes of fancy alcohol, but still). Since his wife is a nurse, she nonchalantly helps him clean needles and steal OxyContin. He skims $10k a month out of the family’s pawn shop and they barely notice, that’s how successful they are.
He gets too friendly w/ a stripper as delusional as him to the point she moves nextdoor to taunt his wife and beg him to marry her instead. He’s able to escape that unscathed but not so lucky when IVing 30 oxies a day. His family catches on (his children none the wiser until he’s arrested by a cop he kicked out of his shop before for being a b!tch). Instead of turning his life around intentionally, he’s court-ordered into rehab, where he hits it off with a spunky crack addict who could doppelgäng for Fran Drescher. Honestly, the infidelity seems his most forgivable offense since his wife seems to have loathed him pre-marriage, especially since she misses being doped up too.
Jailed for romantically evading rehab with his new amour, he runs into more failed AA members. He actually turns to god in an abstract way, relying on gratitude for still being alive. Once he’s free, he’s calmly in recovery by himself for a yr but his wife is using again. They’re always in reverse so, one night, she steals thousands of dollars from his business and thinks about running away but she changes her mind at the last second. She says they don’t have to get the divorce he wants, she’ll get clean ‘cause the kids need a better home life. But maintaining all this and a failing business is too much to bear.
No longer separated, Bret and his wife start doing crack and heroin more than ever. Though they rarely miss mortgage payments or things like that, their relationship leads to much more isolation, coke psychosis, and suicide attempts. His hallucinations are a message to stop lest he wanna materialize the funerals and death rattles of family, but he doesn’t get the memo until most of them desert him, and he winds up in jail again, where he writes this. His recovery is brief and he admits potentially ephemeral but he has to take it one day at a time. Or a few years on the straight and narrow are better than none. He attributes getting clean to incarceration and the grace of god. It’s a pretty good thing he doesn’t get much into it recovery because so many memoirs drag that out and I’ve never seen any of them articulate the process in an entertaining or gradual way. Or they sermonize unbelievable cliches for a hundred pages like the Prozac Nation chick did. This is leagues better. Darkly hilarious and always with consistent but unique takes. Sure, there could've been more about the kids and how he kept the lid on affairs, but maybe that was out of respect for privacy or potential defamation 'suits.
August 22, 2023
This was a hard read for several reasons. It was extremely difficult to empathize with the author. He was so unlikable from the beginning that when it was time to be understanding it was almost impossible. I do applaud that he eventually got sober but I had a lot of trouble getting through his escapades.
October 30, 2021
Wishing the author well in his recovery, but it seems to me is an ongoing battle of deception, lies and character.
Kudos for being straightforward in telling us about his addiction.
Really, all the best, Brett Douglas. STAY STRONG 💪
Kudos for being straightforward in telling us about his addiction.
Really, all the best, Brett Douglas. STAY STRONG 💪
May 12, 2023
Terrifying
November 9, 2023
Literally a book of an unlikable man who makes vile choice after vile choice.
Ew. Can’t even read.
Ew. Can’t even read.
January 23, 2024
First 5 star of 2024. This was a deeply disturbing memoir about addiction.
April 20, 2025
Finally a book by a recovering addict that's not bullshit and rainbows. This is real and brutally honest.
I remember well ecstasy being legal in Texas and making those same road trips from where I live in New Orleans.
This book really resonated with me. I hope you're doing well. Brett. ❤️
I remember well ecstasy being legal in Texas and making those same road trips from where I live in New Orleans.
This book really resonated with me. I hope you're doing well. Brett. ❤️
August 29, 2019
If I had to select one word to describe American Drug Addict: a memoir, it would be . . . ballsy. Seriously, imagine sharing your deepest regrets and your darkest secrets with just one person you know, let alone millions with whom you have no familiarity with.
Blog excerpt:
"I am ever curious as to why people use drugs, how they develop a relationship with “hard” drugs . . . just why, why, WHY? I think it is of the utmost importance that I note that my curiosity is not based in judgment; my inquisitiveness is based solely on my craving for knowledge.
What I do understand is that the topic is complex, personal, and unique. I have an education in Psychology and Criminology, and yet, I continue to lack a hypothesis. I have studied the overdosing issue(s) from a viewpoint comprised of a variety of angles: law enforcement, public health, psychology, sociological, and humanitarian. I have read copious memoirs, articles, books, and textbooks. I have watched an ample number of episodes of Intervention and Dope, as well as viewed documentaries galore."
American Drug Addict: a memoir is the first book that has provided me with answers to some of my burning questions. The author shares why, how, when, as well as who he was before addiction, how he behaved during the throes of it, and who he became after a journey to recovery.
Easily 4 stars from me.
Blog excerpt:
"I am ever curious as to why people use drugs, how they develop a relationship with “hard” drugs . . . just why, why, WHY? I think it is of the utmost importance that I note that my curiosity is not based in judgment; my inquisitiveness is based solely on my craving for knowledge.
What I do understand is that the topic is complex, personal, and unique. I have an education in Psychology and Criminology, and yet, I continue to lack a hypothesis. I have studied the overdosing issue(s) from a viewpoint comprised of a variety of angles: law enforcement, public health, psychology, sociological, and humanitarian. I have read copious memoirs, articles, books, and textbooks. I have watched an ample number of episodes of Intervention and Dope, as well as viewed documentaries galore."
American Drug Addict: a memoir is the first book that has provided me with answers to some of my burning questions. The author shares why, how, when, as well as who he was before addiction, how he behaved during the throes of it, and who he became after a journey to recovery.
Easily 4 stars from me.
August 4, 2021
I love reading the other reviews and how so many people are judging his journey. No one gets to pick or tell you the right way. What matters is that you get to the way that keeps you sober, that second, that minute, that hour, that day.
Very well done. I appreciate the humor he has of himself and his choices. We all can hopefully laugh at ourselves. But the honesty of his story is what matters most. I can see someone thinking he glamorizes using. At the time, there is that sensation, that is all apart of the drug, the use, the justification.
I think it’s a brilliant and honest story that I am thankful he shared and the reality of what happens, but the peace that comes with being sober. With not necessarily knowing what the actual next ‘thing’ is in your life, but knowing that being sober and a belief in something greater than you will get you where you need to be.
Thanks, Brett
Very well done. I appreciate the humor he has of himself and his choices. We all can hopefully laugh at ourselves. But the honesty of his story is what matters most. I can see someone thinking he glamorizes using. At the time, there is that sensation, that is all apart of the drug, the use, the justification.
I think it’s a brilliant and honest story that I am thankful he shared and the reality of what happens, but the peace that comes with being sober. With not necessarily knowing what the actual next ‘thing’ is in your life, but knowing that being sober and a belief in something greater than you will get you where you need to be.
Thanks, Brett
January 16, 2021
This is difficult to review. On one hand, it is obvious Douglas struggled with addiction in an incredibly serious way, and has been able to confront and expose this with brutal honesty. But I just cannot get past the fact he is not, or at least does not portray himself to be, a very thoughtful and reflective person. He does not give any thought to where or why his addiction arose other than sheer hedonism - he just liked feeling good, being high. He didn’t analyse his deeply middle-class roots and the privilege of him being a white drug addict, and the ability to ‘bounce back’ after imprisonment, or whilst in the thick of addiction. I admire his ability to be brutally honest, but think this could’ve done with some more hard thinking.
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