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The Amazing Adventures of an Ordinary Woman #8

I Need a Lifeguard Everywhere But the Pool

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The bestselling and “perennially hilarious” mother-daughter team is back with a new collection of stories from their real lives, guaranteed to make you laugh out loud. Join Lisa and Francesca as they regret drunk-shopping online, try smell-dating, and explore the freedom of a hiatus from men - a Guyatus. They offer a fresh and funny take on the triumphs and facepalm moments of modern life, showing that when it comes to navigating the crazy world we live in, you’re always your own best lifeguard

336 pages, Hardcover

First published July 11, 2017

231 people are currently reading
5587 people want to read

About the author

Lisa Scottoline

130 books15.4k followers
Lisa Scottoline is a #1 bestselling and Edgar award-winning author of 33 novels. Her books are book-club favorites, and Lisa and her daughter Francesca Serritella have hosted an annual Big Book Club Party for over a thousand readers at her Pennsylvania farm, for the past twelve years. Lisa has served as President of Mystery Writers of America, and her reviews of fiction and non-fiction have appeared in The New York Times, The Washington Post and The Philadelphia Inquirer. She also writes a weekly column with her daughter for the Philadelphia Inquirer entitled Chick Wit, a witty take on life from a woman’s perspective, which have been collected in a bestselling series of humorous memoirs. Lisa graduated magna cum laude in three years from the University of Pennsylvania, with a B.A. in English, and cum laude from the University of Pennsylvania Law School, where she taught Justice and Fiction. Lisa has over 30 million copies of her books in print and is published in over 35 countries. She lives in the Philadelphia area with an array of disobedient pets and wouldn’t have it any other way.

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 402 reviews
Profile Image for Jill McGill .
254 reviews179 followers
May 6, 2017
The mother-daughter duo has done it again! This is the perfect pick-me-up book!!!

This book is a collection of short, entertaining stories by Lisa Scottoline and her daughter Francesca Serritella. In it you will find quick, hilarious, and some touching stories about life, love, politics, pets, and pretty much everything in between that most everyone can relate to. The way they write each story will make you feel like you are sitting down having lunch or a cup of coffee with them. Highly recommend!

I won a copy of this book from a Goodreads giveaway in exchange for this honest review.
Profile Image for Carole (Carole's Random Life).
1,937 reviews600 followers
July 13, 2017
This review can also be found at Carole's Random Life in Books.

These books are just a lot of fun. I have read quite a few of these books by Lisa Scottoline and her daughter, Francesca Serritella, and have really enjoyed all of them. The stories in this book are each very short and can be read in a couple of minutes but are highly addictive. I couldn't seem to read just a few of the stories but found myself reading this book like it was a marathon or something. I just cannot get enough of these glimpses into Lisa and Francesca's lives.

I found it so easy to relate to Lisa and Francesca. Lisa Scottoline is an author that I really enjoy and have been reading for a number of years. While I was at one of Lisa's book signings, another fan recommend that I read the books in this series. So I did and the rest is history. Though these books I really feel like I have had the chance to really get to know Lisa and Francesca. I feel almost like I could pull up a chair at their table for a nice chat because they have really let me into their lives through these books. In the previous books in the series, I found myself relating to Lisa much more than Francesca but I this book I think it has evened out a bit. Maybe it is because Francesca didn't really talk about dating as she has in previous books because she is on a hiatus from men. I am an old married woman and barely remember dating so I am happy to read about other things.

This book covers a little bit of everything. Seriously everything. There are stories about yoga, bridal showers, snakes, dogs, doggy diapers, family members, building furniture, remote controls, exercise equipment, buying trucks, and the list goes on. Really these stories are just about navigating through life and all of the things that are encountered on a daily basis. These stories are told with a good dose of humor and many mentions of Bradley Cooper. Lisa has a series thing for Bradley Cooper. Not all of the stories are pretty and some made me squirm. Hello...snakes!! Some stories were more serious and heartfelt but all of them were very real.

I would highly recommend this book to others. I think that just about any woman that has made it to adulthood will find something to relate to in this book. I can't wait to read more of their work in the future.

I received an advance reader edition of this book from St. Martin's Press via NetGalley.

Initial Thoughts
This was an entertaining group of articles. I related to most of what both authors talked about and found myself chuckling a few times.
Profile Image for Kristyn - Reading to Unwind.
252 reviews19 followers
January 22, 2018
This book is written my mother and daughter duo Lisa Scottoline and Francesca Serritella. I have read several of Lisa Scottoline’s books and enjoyed them so I was excited to see what this book had to offer.

This book is told in a series of short chapters that talk about happenings in Lisa’s and Francesca’s current life as they are writing. The stories are meant to be more on the comical side, not truly reflective of Lisa’s novel style. The stories are told from Lisa’s perspective and Francesca’s perspectives in the different chapters. Lisa has more of the stories, but we do get alternating ones when Francesca takes over the story telling. The chapters/stories are short in nature so they are quick reads.

I enjoyed reading the stories about the current happenings in their lives. It was interesting to hear how everyday occurrences can be made into fun stories to listen too. I loved that we get to see the relationship between mother and daughter as they both speak about one another in their perspective stories. As a reader you can tell that the mother and daughter share a very deep and special bond.

Some of the stories are laugh out loud funny. We get to hear each of their own thoughts about what is going on. It was a fun read that I couldn’t put down once I started it. They talk about a lot of everyday modern happenings and give their opinion.

I would suggest this a nighttime read. It is a great book to take your mind off the day. The stories don’t follow one another so it is easy to read a few stories before bed to relax. The flow of the book does feel natural, but it doesn’t have a specific order.

I received a copy of this book from Netgalley to provide an honest review. This does not affect my opinion of this book.
Profile Image for Sherwood Smith.
Author 168 books37.5k followers
Read
July 11, 2017
This is the second book by this mother and daughter team that I've read. Comprised of short anecdotes or commentary, it makes perfect beach or commuter read. The two cover every subject under the sun that might be of interest to American women of the mainstream: there's aging, and being a thirty-something, sports, the election (their hope was painful to read in retrospect), and the dream of owning a white picket fence. While aware of the status of 'white picket fence' in American lore.

But they also explore the inexplicables of modern life: owning an iPhone, nude dining (yes, apparently it's a thing), when to wear a bra and when not to bother, dieting, dog ownership, the excruciating "games" at bridal showers, weird stuff you find on the Internet, and the etiquette of Twitter. Male birth control. Weird super foods, and how big butts are supposed to be a sign of longevity. Some of these will cause a snicker, at least they did for me.

Here and there you get a glimpse of the writing life, which I enjoyed even though my process couldn't be more different (Lisa likes the sound of the TV running, which would drive me insane), and between the snickers there are thoughtful anecdotes, and one lovely one about taking the summer ferry to Ellis Island.

Mostly, though, it's quick reads aimed unapologetically at a female audience. Odd ducks as we all are, or feel ourselves to be (I cringed in sympathy at the one about attending a big publisher party, at which you know no one), there is a solidarity in fellow-feel.

Copy provided by NetGalley
154 reviews4 followers
September 18, 2017
More reviews are available on my blog:
https://reviewsofbooksonmynightstand....

I read my first Lisa Scottoline novel in April of this year. This book is so much different from One Perfect Lie. This book is more of a comedic memoir than a mystery or thriller. Scottoline and her daughter, Francesca Serritella, write about their funny lives in a series of essays. Serritella writes about her hiatus from men and the insanity of forcing guests to make wedding dresses from toilet paper at bridal showers. Scottoline writes about her disabled dog that is in a wheelchair and how she only wears a bra when she absolutely has to. Both women write about their daily lives in a way that is both self-deprecating but also empowering to women.

There were definitely some very funny parts in this book but I wouldn't say that it was the funniest thing that I have read. I have read a lot of comedic essay books by authors like Jen Lancaster who have me laughing from the first page to the last. What I did really like about this book was the very endearing relationship that Scottoline and Serritella display in their work. They seem to really love what they do (writing) and love each other. I really enjoyed reading that. The writing style is very easy to read and I was able to finish the book very quickly. This is a great book to read when you need something light and entertaining.

I received an advanced copy of this book in order to write an honest review. All opinions are my own.
Profile Image for Jill Elizabeth.
1,925 reviews50 followers
May 30, 2017
I don't know what I expected from this book - I don't generally like short stories, but I do like memoir tidbits and personal narratives. But this one didn't read like any of those things - it read like a series of personal growth columns or blog blurbs. The pieces were anecdotes, not so much stories. I'd start enjoying one and it would end within a page or two of beginning. And some of them, well, let's just say I was glad they were so short...

I have tried reading Lisa Scottoline before; her books are very popular, but her writing has never held me. I don't know why - I have enjoyed similar authors, and generally like a beach-read mystery/thriller as much as the next girl, but for some reason I have never connected with her fiction. I was intrigued by the idea of a mother/daughter duo of stories about life though, so picked this one up anyway. I will admit that I found the writing easier going in this book than in her fiction - BUT the style/format didn't resonate with me any more than in her other books. These felt a little too pithy, like they were trying to be world-wise and sagacious, when they were instead just tidbits and teasers about stories in the women's lives...

My expectations may have been the issue here - there's nothing wrong with the book or the writing, it just didn't catch my attention. I think it's also possible that she's just not an author for me...
Profile Image for Maha.
285 reviews31 followers
July 11, 2017
Let’s just agree on something. We love Lisa Scottoline! Yesss. I Need a Lifeguard Everywhere but the Pool is such a hilarious summer read. I couldn’t get enough of it.

Lisa and her lovely daughter Francesca share with us some great essays. It’s their thoughts on so many issues. It can be everyday life issues, political issues or just anything. It’s like small friendly talk. The essays are separate and each one takes you into a different topic.

I can’t say whom I love more. Lisa and Francesca are both amazing. Sometimes I caught myself laughing out loud, sometimes smiling and sometimes just thinking deeply. There is something in each and every essay that will catch your interest.

I think the secret ingredient is the simplicity, and of course the lovely two authors. They are putting part of their spirits into the words. Reading this book felt like a friendly chatter between close friends on a lovely summer afternoon. Lisa is not just an author. She’s someone you want to be friend with. She’s a lovely hilarious person. You know that type of friend that you always enjoy talking to. And Francesca is the new age empowered young woman who sees things positively and wants to take things into her own hands. She won’t be driven along. She’s a strong amazing woman.

Have you ever had the question “Am I the only one?” Well I had it about so many things. This book answered this question. Thanks. I am not alone. There are other people who have those tiny thoughts about things. Funny right?! There are things – very trivial things maybe - that I thought I was the only one doing or considering or whatever. I was amazed to see some of those in the book.

Finally, I Need a Lifeguard Everywhere But the Pool is an amazing summer read. Don’t miss it. It will lift your mood and empower you. I am amazed. Lisa Scottoline seems to have two sides. The thriller author and the funny dear relative. I love both!

**Special thanks to the NetGalley & St. Martin's Press for supplying my copy of this book in exchange for an honest and unbiased review. This does not affect my opinion of the book or the content of my review. **


For all my reviews please visit http://www.meshascorner.net
Profile Image for Jane.
1,069 reviews61 followers
July 18, 2017
Thanks to Goodreads and St. Martin's Press for this ARC.

I'm a big fan of Lisa Scottoline's books and especially her non-fiction with daughter Francesca. I look forward to reading these once a year.

Hysterically funny as always in her life no matter what she talks about. I can relate to her more so than Francesca probably because she's a few years older than me. Francesca has a different point of view but I do like her take on things being mature at 30 years old.
Profile Image for Lynn H.
483 reviews31 followers
June 26, 2017
“Life gets in the way” is an understatement when it comes to why I haven’t read a book in so long. But you don’t want to hear about that…..you want to know what I thought about this book. Well, I loved it! As I do all the antidotal books this mother/daughter team puts out. I’m about a decade younger than Lisa, but relate and find plenty of humor in her stories. And although a different generation than Francesca, I enjoy her stories as well. I truly enjoy them all and feel like they are family while I read these books.

These stories are just the dose of humor needed. I’ve read a couple biographies of comedians this year and actually enjoy these books more. Neither make you laugh ‘til you cry, but I find these stories more relatable and thus more funny and endearing. They are an easy read to take you away from the chaos of everyday life. And with it being a book of short stories, you can easily put it down and pick it back up without worrying about where you left off (or you can just read it in two days like me).

Thank you to Net Galley and St. Martin's Press for an advanced copy of the book in return for an honest review.
Profile Image for Jeanne.
721 reviews
October 11, 2020
I listened to this collection of mother and daughter essays on life, love, and livings and enjoyed it as usual. . . though somehow I didn't like it as much as I have some others. I think part of it is that some of the essays came from the 2016 election season and while both Lisa and Francesca are non-partisan in their writing, in light of what was to come some come off as a little naive. By that I mean that they say things like we'll all be back to normal after the election, implying that everyone will be fine which in this very tense election cycle seems unrealistic-- and yet, just four short years ago it seemed reasonable to assume. Here's hoping that if I listen to it again in four years I won't notice a thing.
Profile Image for Elizabeth.
1,099 reviews27 followers
July 11, 2017
First, let me say that Lisa Scottoline is one of my favorite authors. I particularly love her humorous essays she writes with her daughter Francesca. This one was another great one. It appealed to me both as a woman and as a woman "of a certain age." These books make me realize that there is a bigger world out there where women just like me have the same or similar joys, heartbreaks, idiosyncrasies and insecurities. The author pokes fun at herself, therefore helping us understand that these things are not so important! I love her tales of driving on the PA turnpike. I almost fell off my chair laughing. There are so many great stories here by both authors that it was a lot of fun to read. Highly recommended!

Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin Press for the opportunity to read this book in exchange for an honest review.
Profile Image for Bobbi.
453 reviews
March 24, 2017
They've done it again! If you haven't had the pleasure of reading the humor series written by this mother/daughter team, please do yourself a favor and get a copy. Their work has been rightfully compared to Erma Bombeck and Nora Ephron.

The chapters alternate between Lisa and Francesca; some are laugh-out-loud funny, some are poignant, and some are downright profound.

Lisa Scottoline is so very supportive of the women she refers to as "extraordinary, ordinary women," and that comes shining through in this latest offering. I highlighted so many quotes and paragraphs that my copy looks like it was printed on yellow paper!

I particularly enjoy reading the perspectives and concerns of two women who, though related, come from different generations - fascinating insights.

And there were many instances that mentioned things most of us have in common, but since they happened to the authors, we can find the humor in them and not feel put down or laughed at - love that!

My thanks to St. Martin's Press, Lisa Scottoline, and Francesca Serritella for the ARC. On sale July 11, 2017.
Profile Image for Ayekah.
1,123 reviews
July 16, 2017
First a huge thanks to StMartin for passing me this arc, second of course to Lisa and Fran for such an amazing book! I never laughed so hard, ever. It was so close to read life it scared me. People (such as myself) actually do these things. In fact we do them a little too often.
I love Lisa's alter ego books, but this was my first treat to mother/daughter and am over the top crazy for this. Telling all my friends they need to read this, especially with summer here and the kids home, there are Moms out there who need comic relief. This book totally fits the bill.
Ladies, I bow humbly to you! Bravo!! Now I am hooked!

**arc from NetGalley and St Martins Press in exchange for a fair review**
Profile Image for Lynn Gardner.
Author 3 books7 followers
June 21, 2017
There are so few books that actually make laugh out loud, to the point where my husband asks what's so funny, but this is one of those. Lisa and Francesca feel like my best friends, sharing my same complaints and reflecting on life in the same way I do, only funnier. I love how the book switches between Lisa and Francesca, both of whom are in different stages of life and even live in different areas - Lisa the suburbs, Francesca the city. It just goes to show how much of life is the same for everyone, something that I love about these books.

I've read a few others in the series and can honestly say that these are my favorite nonfiction books that I've ever read. If you're looking for a good, lighthearted laugh, with some real-life hard emotions thrown in, this book is for you. In fact, this series is for you. Actually, these women are for you.
Profile Image for Patricia Romero.
1,789 reviews46 followers
May 17, 2017
Mother and Daughter have once again succeeded in making us laught until we cry as they share their lives, and views on every topic you can think of!

Two generations give us their take on life today. And it all works beautifully. Funny, Touching and Thought provoking subjects that each one shares with us in alternate chapters.

It was my pleasure to read this book and I only wish it was out before Mother's Day!
Profile Image for Denise.
762 reviews108 followers
January 23, 2022
Good audio book but not my favourite. I could relate to the back to school section about binders, pens and paper and the mention of ‘hoarding’ books.
Profile Image for Melissa Borsey.
1,863 reviews37 followers
January 23, 2018
I love these quick, entertaining books by this great mother-daughter duo. Get ready for some laughs about everything from garden snakes to bras to taking a guyhatus. I thank Netgalley for the opportunity to read and review this fun book.
Profile Image for Jeanie.
3,048 reviews1 follower
October 2, 2017
So what is the moral of the story- or even of this book? Sometimes you do the right thing, even when you have no idea what you're doing. Even though your brain is saying: You can't negotiate. You can't even swim. You need a lifeguard. We really are own life guard in the end.

I love reading Scottoline and you can see her personality - likes and dislikes in her books. I think her characters are very close to the vest after reading this. She is very funny along with her daughter. I am sure they are a hoot to be around. Of course, there are some things I disagree with but the book is not about a debate on issues but how these two have struggled with life with humor and kindness. At times it was very political without giving to which party but referring to her was a strong indication to which party. Sometimes these issues can be so decisive in their own merit but I think that is what they were trying to avoid in sharing their pet peeves, womanhood, marriage, gardening and home improvement. It was a book to connect to her readers in a very real way. To have a little Scottoline in each of our lives.

The above statement does not reflect my own life not that I do not need help. I need plenty. I am the one that usually gets myself in trouble. I am my own worst enemy. I am not qualified to be my own lifeguard. I trust in Jesus and those that he places in my life for that. With that, I still enjoy a little Scottoline on my shelf and I am glad I got to know her a little better.

A Special Thank You to St Martin's Press and Netgalley for the ARC and the opportunity to post an honest review.
Profile Image for Gina.
947 reviews21 followers
October 4, 2017
I listened to the audio version of this book which is a compilation of short, funny little vignettes told by two authors- mother and daughter team. I'll be honest; at first their voices were a little too peppy for me. However, the more I listened, the more I laughed- so much so that I picked up another audio book of theirs to listen to next! Good for a lighthearted read.
Profile Image for Onceinabluemoon.
2,794 reviews70 followers
July 13, 2017
I think comedy is the hardest book to write, just not my style of humor, but love that mother daughter are such best buddies.
Profile Image for Cathi.
289 reviews
March 4, 2019
Ms. Scottolini thinks she is funny. I disagree.
Profile Image for Sue Fernandez.
791 reviews15 followers
May 1, 2017
Thank you to Net Galley and St. Martin's Press for the ARC of this book. I've read Lisa Scottoline and her daughter before, and I enjoyed them then...I enjoyed it now. I love books with alternating chapters, and this one alternates between mother and daughter. I love the positive vibe and it was wonderful to see mother and daughter, being of different generations, but really....we're all the same deep down. This goes on sale 7/11/17....it would make a GREAT summer read.
Profile Image for Angie.
216 reviews14 followers
April 19, 2018
Lit & Laughter Book Club for April. Group discussion: there were some funny moments for sure. People found they could relate to the daughter or the mother, depending upon their age. People seemed to appreciate that. Light reading. I do have an interest in reading more of mother Lisa's books - I am curious how this seemingly-slapstick comedienne writes dark thrillers. Lisa calls herself the Jekyll and Hyde of authors. Overall, a quick, fine read.
Profile Image for E.
82 reviews3 followers
March 15, 2018
It took me a while to warm up to this book, but some the essays were very good. I especially liked "Girl Vitamin," where Francesca talks about men needing women to complete them instead of being partners. I wish Lisa's claim that women with large butts have lower cholesterol was true, but in my case, it certainly isn't!
Profile Image for Jennifer.
662 reviews34 followers
April 15, 2017
I received a copy of this book from the publisher via NetGalley. The opinions expressed are my own.

The mother-daughter duo of Lisa and Francesca have another hit for readers! Their style of short essays with humor and (some) seriousness are addicting. I can't wait to buy the audio version and listen to them read their work.

Highly recommended and appreciated!
Profile Image for Jenn.
105 reviews4 followers
August 6, 2017
Loved hearing this book read by the authors! After watching a clip on Lisa's website, I wanted to try listening to the book to see how it was. Even though I'm not a fan of audio books, it's worth it just to hear the sarcastic and funny bits in their own voices!
Profile Image for Anita.
782 reviews208 followers
August 29, 2017
The books that Lisa and her daughter co author are fabulous. I choose the audio versions narrated by mom/daughter. Short essays and very empowering. Make you laugh and maybe think a little too. Perfect listening/reading escape.
Profile Image for Margaret.
Author 20 books104 followers
October 1, 2017
I love these little books by Lisa and her daughter, Francesca Serritella. A look at life through two sets of eyes. Both ladies are exceedingly funny, and many of their anecdotes really hit the mark with me.

Well worth a read, especially at the end of a very trying day.
Profile Image for Tori.
541 reviews14 followers
April 17, 2018
Did I finish my non fiction book of the year, oh heck yeah I did. Did I like no, not really. It wasn’t the book itself, it was funny and had lots I could relate to but it was just the topic-the nonsense of everyday life. It was good for what it was but no offense wonderful ladies of this novel, I will be heading back to my YA fiction.
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