The Uncollected David Rakoff: Including the entire text of Love, Dishonor, Marry, Die, Cherish, Perish

by David Rakoff, Timothy G. Young (Editor)

Bestselling and Thurber Prize–winning humorist David Rakoff was one of the most original, delightfully acerbic voices of his generation. Here, in one place, is the best of his previously uncollected material—most never before published in book form.
 
David Rakoff’s singular personality spills from every page of this witty and entertaining volume, which includes travel features, early fiction works, pop culture criticism, and transcripts of his most memorable appearances on public radio’s Fresh Air and This American Life.

These writings chart his transformation from fish out of water, meekly arriving for college in 1982, to a proud New Yorker bluntly opining on how to walk properly in the city. They show his unparalleled ability to capture the pleasures of solitary pursuits like cooking and crafting, especially in times of trouble; as well as the ups and downs in the life-span of a friendship, whether it is a real relationship or an imaginary correspondence between Gregor Samsa and Dr. Seuss (co-authored with Jonathan Goldstein). Also included is his novel-in-verse Love, Dishonor, Marry, Die, Cherish, Perish.
 
By turns hilarious, incisive and deeply moving, this collection highlights the many facets of Rakoff’s huge talent and shows the arc of his remarkable career.

With a foreword by Paul Rudnick.


From the Trade Paperback edition.

Genres: Humor, Nonfiction, Memoir, Essays, Short Stories, LGBT, Queer

352 pages, Paperback

First published October 27, 2015

About the author

David Rakoff (November 27, 1964 – August 9, 2012) was an essayist, journalist, and actor. Originally from Canada, Rakoff was a graduate of Columbia University, he obtained dual Canadian-American citizenship in 2003, and resided for much of his life in New York City. His brother Simon is a stand-up comedian.

Rakoff wrote for the New York Times Magazine, Outside, GQ, Vogue and Salon. He was a frequent contributor to the radio program This American Life on Public Radio International.

Rakoff's essays have been collected in the books Fraud and Don’t Get Too Comfortable and are largely autobiographical and humorous. He was openly gay, and his writings have been compared to those of essayist and friend David Sedaris. Rakoff was even mistaken for Sedaris once while performing in a storefront window; both authors have written about this incident in their books.

Rakoff was featured in the This American Life episode 305, the holiday show on December 23, 2005, and episode 156, "What Remains", broadcast 21 March 2000. He was the only individual to host in place of Ira Glass a This American Life episode (Episode 248 - "Like It Or Not"). Rakoff made several appearances on the The Daily Show, and voiced the reading part of Thomas Jefferson for Jon Stewart's, America (The Book): A Citizen's Guide to Democracy Inaction.

Rakoff's acting roles included the Off-Broadway comedy play, The Book of Liz, authored by friends David and Amy Sedaris, the film Strangers with Candy, also co-written by Amy Sedaris, and a cameo in the film Capote.

Reviews

[Hank Stuever · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fast, breezy reads (finished on two flights LAX > DFW > ICT) of mostly magazine pieces that might have gone forgotten (they aren't in the other collections, per the title), plus transcripts of two Terry Gross interviews and some other stuff. The only thing that gave me pause was a tagline on one of the lesser pieces that said it was never published, but discovered in his hard drive. That's sort of a chilling thought -- remind me to clear out my hard drive before I die.

Anyway, the most important thing: David Rakoff is deeply missed by those who knew him and those who read him. This is another opportunity to cherish him.

[Erin · Rating 4 out of 5]

ARC for review from NetGalley.

I've long been a fan of Rakoff and have read several of his books, so I jumped at the chance to read his uncollected materials (this volume also includes the standalone Love, Dishonor, Marry, Die, Cherish, Perish which I've reviewed separately.

If this is your first experience with Rakoff, do yourself a favor and read one of his outstanding essay collections first, Fraud is probably my favorite. Since these are "uncollected" works, they, understandably, don't hang together in the same way his curated (if that's the right word) collections do - there's some definite unevenness and some I could have skipped altogether (like the investigation of the book Bambi and its author). However, if you are a Rakoff completist you'll be thrilled this book exists and will likely find some unread gems here, on things like the Rat Pack (in the wonderful "The Wizards of Id"), ending friendships, his thoughts about his recurrence of cancer and some interesting "Fresh Air" transcripts.

Some of my favorites:

"Goodbye to All of You" - "What 'suspiciously social' means is that I am perceived to know and maintain too many relationships with people. If one is friendly to everyone, one is friendly to no one. Of course, this is not actually true. I have a very significant core group of friends who, despite transoceanic migrations, etc., remain the most cohesive social network of my adult life. In fact, the bonds get stronger as my social world shrinks."

"The Wizards of Id" - "The Swingerati have ignored the gallery entirely and gone straight for the gift shop."

"Tweenage Wasteland" - "The schism is unmistakable: Threshold to Love for the girls, Body and Its Dangers for the boys; the peaceable but decidedly separate Kingdoms of Rainbows and Farts."

"David Rakoff's Half Empty Worldview Is Full of Wit" - "And it's a kind of negative thinking call defensive pessimism.....the defensive pessimist sort of looks at something and say this is going to be a disaster. And because of that, they lower their expectations,, and they think this is going to be a disaster because of such and such. And they go through all of the negative capacities....you know, you imagine the worst-case scenario you can, and you go through it step by step, and you dismantle those things and you manage your anxiety about it."

Highly recommended for fans.

[Killian · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was such a chore to read. I love Rakoff, but I've only ever heard his spoken work performances, or heard him read his pieces aloud. I've never tried reading his work on the page. It was rough.

I think most of the problem was I had no frame of reference for so many of these pieces. I have never lived in New York City, or even visited it. I've never been to Canada, nor know much of it other than it's geographical location. So many of his media references were straight google material for me, and it got tiring just not understanding what he was saying or trying to convey.

The pieces I did like were the one's he wrote in fiction style prose. For instance, "What's Up, Dike?" was genius. Or his more general musings which I could connect with, like in "Unaccustomed as I Am... How to Give a Wedding Toast". Obviously "Love, Dishonor, Marry, Die, Cherish, Perish" was the highlight, though I had read parts of it previously.

Overall, I can't give this book a bad rating because I wasn't able to relate to most of the stories. That's my issue, not the books. But I didn't really enjoy it and it was rough slogging through til the end.

Copy courtesy of Knopf Doubleday Publishing Group, via Netgalley in exchange for an honest review

[Book Riot Community]

The literary world lost one of its funniest writers when David Rakoff died in 2012. This collection is a great introduction for people who have not read Rakoff's work before, or a special treat for his fans. Rakoff was very clever, acerbic, and funny, and I hope his work will continue to be loved and shared for years to come.

Tune in to our weekly podcast dedicated to all things new books, All The Books: http://bookriot.com/category/all-the-...

[Ariel · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was so sad when he died. Though I didn't know him, he was a friend of several of my friends and I just love everything he ever wrote. It's a pleasure just to spend a little time with him again in this new book.

[Lorilin · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was only vaguely familiar with Rakoff's work before reading this book. I had read a few of his pieces in The New York Times and Salon a while back, so I knew what to expect somewhat. But I was really excited to see what possible-gems I had missed.

Initially, I loved this book. The first few essays in here are tremendous. My Sister of Perpetual Mercy, Sagrada Familia (this one is actually fiction), and Diary, 1998 are perfect: descriptive, honest, funny, witty, and, truly, quite heartfelt. I was sold. I was in. Give me more, David!

But, unfortunately, the collection took a nose-dive about seven essays in. The writing began to lack, I don't know, personality, interest, heart. There are a lot of travel/nature pieces in here, which I wasn't expecting. Some are humorous, but after reading those first few phenomenal stories, I found these others to be boring, almost like Rakoff wasn't really invested in them. I did end up loving one other short essay later in the book: The Waiting. But, in it, Rakoff revisits personal themes again (specifically: his experience with having cancer), so the writing becomes more intense, more raw.

Ultimately, most of the essays and stories in this collection are just okay. But the ones that stood out really made me take notice. I plan on checking out Rakoff's other works; I might start with Fraud.

[Debra Komar · Rating 3 out of 5]

I adore David Rakoff but I cannot see why this collection needs to exist. It really feels as if the editors scraped the bottom of some barrel to find this material. There is no central theme, nothing holding the pieces together. There are a few early pieces that don't have Rakoff's voice and are wholly forgettable. Then there are a few classics from his early magazine work. Much of the volume, unfortunately, is made up of transcripts from Rakoff's radio appearances on NPR, and they don't translate to the written page well. There are also some unpublished pieces and some letters to the editor - real arcane stuff. Then there is the inexplicable inclusion of Rakoff's story in verse, which was brilliant yet already published under another cover. The net result is a very unfocused and sometimes unflattering collection of a writer who deserves to be remembered at his best. The flashes of brilliance are great - the rest is filler.

[tyto · Rating 3 out of 5]

I received this from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

3 1/2 stars


I've wanted to read David Rakoff for a long time (I feel like my first exposure to him was on the Daily Show but I can't be sure), so I was glad for the opportunity to read this collection of his works. However, this was probably not the best collection for me to start with. Rakoff's talent, humor, and magnetism shine through in all his works, and I will definitely be reading his other collections. However, I didn't really care for some of the travel writing, and I probably should have read some of his other works first.

[John · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'm going to call this one 3.5, but not a full four; the interviews and other non-essay components weren't for me at all, but the rest were a well chosen complement to his earlier collections. The entries written when he knew he was dying were a bit haunting.

[Yuliya · Rating 5 out of 5]

Unjust. Unfair. Stop making me cry.

[Andrew · Rating 4 out of 5]

This collection was published after David Rakoff's death, but it's not exactly a requiem. The forward is a remembrance, but then the book itself is a collection of his works, touching only here and there on his illness. Despite this, the book left me feeling very much like I'd just attended his funeral (well, maybe his unveiling). I only read one selection out of order: the second of two transcripts of David's appearances on Fresh Air. After reading the first one, I decided to skip the second one because reading an extemporaneous interview is not like reading a something written, edited, and published, and I wasn't in the mood for a second one. When I reached the end, I went back and read it because I wanted to have read the whole thing. In this interview, they talk a lot about his condition and treatment, and his feelings about his future. David is cheery and optimistic, and Terry Gross closes the interview by wishing him good health and "all the best." It was really a punch in the gut to end there. I'm not sure I'd recommend it.

After finishing the book I went back and read the forward again, where it refers to that interview as "this collection's final and heartbreaking entry," by which I can't tell what they mean. It is neither the last entry in the book by page number nor is it the last chronologically. Maybe it was intended to be the closing piece in the collection at the writing of the forward, and then the order was changed for some reason. In any case, I unwittingly (or subconsciously) saved it for last, as the forward seems to have directed, and resulting emotional payload seems appropriate.

[John Bunyan · Rating 3 out of 5]

I wanted to read the rhyming couplet novella, Love, Dishonor, Marry, etc. When I saw this collection that included that piece I figured it was the book to get.
I really enjoyed the short humor pieces, the interviews from Fresh Air, and some of the other magazine pieces. I don’t really care about the free travel articles Rakoff wrote. Most disappointing was the rhyming novella. I just struggled to follow the story and there were elements of child rape and violence that really were not what I was expecting or wanting to read about. No other parts of the story drew me in either so I only read 1/2 of it.
This book was still good, just not great. And none of it diminished my opinion that Rakoff is a very good writer and humorist. I will get some of his other collections of all humor articles to read.

[Villa Park Public Library · Rating 5 out of 5]

Though released posthumously following Rakoff's heartbreaking yet hilariously documented battles with cancer, this collection of short stories comprises many of the author's featured tales from National Public Radio's "This American Life" and "Fresh Aire," as well as variations of previously published essays. As a bonus, the book includes the entirety of Rakoff's final opus, a novel-in-verse titled "Love, Dishonor, Marry, Die, Cherish, Perish," a brilliant play on the legendary "Scorpion and Frog" fable. A touching foreword and farewell by humorist Paul Rudnick is the perfect first course to the menu of Rakoff's deliciously told stories.

Check this book out at the Villa Park Public Library!

[Koyaaaa · Rating 4 out of 5]

I didn’t enjoy this quite as much as his books of essays that have more of a conceptual thread tying them together, but I still enjoyed this a lot. It was nice to read these pieces that I never would have hunted down on my own, and it was interesting to see how David Rakoff on assignment is different or similar to David Rakoff writing more for himself.

I was also surprised by how much I liked Love, Dishonor, Marry, Die, Cherish, Perish. As the most reluctant reader of fiction, it made me think that maybe if all fiction were written in rhyming couplet I would like it more. Of course, all of the essays and the novel take on an undercurrent of grief knowing that this is a posthumous collection, but it made the novel especially moving.

[Hal Schrieve · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ohhhh I love David and I miss him and I wish he were alive . Some of this stuff is dramatic for me because I read this book in the midst of a deep depression and he pulled me out of it a little-- but I do want to articulate that his short fiction is moving and his essays about his neuroses and illnesses just make me love him as a person. I don't know if I would really love him if I met him but this compilation pays fantastic tribute to a smart, funny man.

[John Millard · Rating 5 out of 5]

I first heard of this writer less then 3 months ago while watching David Sedaris entertaining the crowd here in Philly. Yea, I am old and should have been listening to more episodes of This American Life. I thoroughly enjoyed the book. I think of DS as a comedian who writes well and reads his own work out loud better then I read it in my head. I think of DR as more of a writer who is genuinely funny. I am grateful to Rosalind Warren for loaning me this book.

[Kirsten · Rating 2 out of 5]

I love David Rakoff, but this wasn’t what I hoped. This is largely a collection of magazine articles that Rakoff wrote; mostly travel pieces which, while interesting, weren’t as funny as I’ve come to expect from him. My favourite bit was him arguing the case for Stuart Little being gay. Very compelling.

*edit* I’ve just read a handful of reviews on here and all of the other ones that rate this as average also start with some version of “I love David Rakoff”.

[Timothy · Rating 3 out of 5]

I’m a big fan of David Rackoff’s writing, and his ability to craft the most beautifully-descriptive sentences. His metaphors are unsuspecting and acerbic. And while each contribution to this collection are fine examples of his talent, it is an incredible dis-jointed collection of essays that are taken out of context. As a result, not as enjoyable as all of his other books.

[meeta khatri · Rating 3 out of 5]

Beautifully written!

I gave this five stars, but my browser would not comply. Discovered David Rakoff through his obituary. The book was funny and conversational, as though David was sitting with you, talking over a glass of wine. I am going to read ‘Fraud’ and ‘Half Empty’ too. Thanks David for filling my time with smiles.

[Kate · Rating 4 out of 5]

It was a joy to revisit Rakoff's writing. I have him filed mentally adjacent to Sedaris, who I also read recently, but was quickly reminded that their writing is really very different and that I find Rakoff much more poignant and devastating.

[Jen · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was really disappointed in this book. I'd seen Rakoff interviewed years ago on The Daily Show (I think) and fell in love with his acerbic wit. For me, it didn't translate to his writing; more caustic, grumpier. Ah well.

[Katharine · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed his pieces on NPR and This American Life. D. R. was such a great writer. My favorite part of the book was his travel writing. It was a slower read for me for some reason, but I enjoyed it.

[Rebecca Scott · Rating 4 out of 5]

I adore David Rakoff's prose, and this collection, while uneven, is really enjoyable. The This American Life piece he wrote after losing the use of his left arm is beyond beautiful, and many others are laugh out loud funny. It is such a pity we lost him and his work so soon.

[Ray Quirolgico · Rating 4 out of 5]

Smart writing combined with singular perspective and sharp wit: such a loss to the world for cancer to take this brilliant man so young. This collection is a great reminder of how pages of intelligence balanced with snark can fill some lonely times with really fun company.

[Georgie Morell · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lol

[Yassi · Rating 5 out of 5]

I will forever miss his wit on This American Life

[Mike Mann · Rating 3 out of 5]

This work is great, but it does shine a bit more listening to it read. Heard a snippet in an NPR broadcast that turned me onto this, but the spoke form of Rakoff’s work is much better.

[Christina · Rating 5 out of 5]

It was a true gift to discover the work of David Rakoff, and a true tragedy that he's no longer able to add to that amazing body of work.

[Tara · Rating 5 out of 5]

I would have normally thought a non-linear, story/ long poetry loosely woven story would ever be so amazingly beautiful as well as incredibly creative with the book covers. Highly recommended.

[Ella barker · Rating 3 out of 5]

5 stars for the poem at the end, had me in tears