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American Housewife

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A sharp, funny, delightfully unhinged collection of stories set in the dark world of domesticity, American Housewife features murderous ladies who lunch, celebrity treasure hunters, and the best bra fitter south of the Mason Dixon line.

Meet the women of American Housewife: they wear lipstick, pearls, and sunscreen, even when it's cloudy. They casserole. They pinwheel. They pump the salad spinner like it's a CPR dummy. And then they kill a party crasher, carefully stepping around the body to pull cookies out of the oven. These twelve irresistible stories take us from a haunted prewar Manhattan apartment building to the set of a rigged reality television show, from the unique initiation ritual of a book club to the getaway car of a pageant princess on the lam, from the gallery opening of a tinfoil artist to the fitting room of a legendary lingerie shop. Vicious, fresh, and nutty as a poisoned Goo Goo Cluster, American Housewife is an uproarious, pointed commentary on womanhood.

208 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 12, 2016

873 people are currently reading
15130 people want to read

About the author

Helen Ellis

21 books718 followers
HELEN ELLIS an American novelist. She has authored two published novels, along with a short story collection and a forthcoming collection of essays. She is a poker player who competes on the national tournament circuit. Raised in Alabama, she lives with her husband in New York City.

Her first novel, Eating the Cheshire Cat (Scribner: 2001), is a dark comedy written in Southern Gothic fiction style. It tells the story of three girls raised in the South, and the odd, sometimes macabre tribulations they endure.

The Turning: What Curiosity Kills (Powell's Books: 2010), her second novel, is a "teen vampire" story about a southern 16-year-old girl adopted into a wealthy New York City family and centers on shape-shifting, teen romance, and the supernatural.

Her third publication, American Housewife (Doubleday: 2016), is "a sharp, funny, delightfully unhinged collection of stories set in the dark world of domesticity".

A collection of essays entitled Southern Lady Code was published in April 2019.

You can find her on Twitter @WhatIDoAllDay and Instagram @AmericanHousewife.

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5 stars
2,538 (15%)
4 stars
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3 stars
5,851 (34%)
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 2,535 reviews
Profile Image for Iris P.
171 reviews222 followers
April 13, 2017

American Housewife: Stories

Ok so American Housewife: Stories didn't cut it for me. I couldn't connect with the whole "Stepford Wife" theme that runs through the 12 stories included in this collection.

Although some of them were slightly entertaining, I didn't find them particularly funny, at best they elicited a sarcastic smirk on my face.

The concept of writing short fiction using dark, unhinged female characters in a domestic setting was pretty clever, but something was missing for me.

I think the satire Helen Ellis evoked in her writing was supposed to highlight the relevance of Feminism, but to me these women came across as too cartoonish, twisted and unpalatable. Maybe I am too removed both geographically and culturally, from their Southern domestic experience to empathize?

My guess is that American Housewife: Stories is either a hit or a miss with readers. I noticed that most ratings are either very high or very low. Plenty of people have liked this but definitively not my cup of tea.
Profile Image for Roxane.
Author 127 books168k followers
January 23, 2016
I love the irreverence of these stories but so many of them feel quite similar and read like notes toward something rather than satisfying stories. There are a couple real highlights. The Fitter is unforgettable, as are Welcome to Book Club and Dead Doormen. My favorite story was Dumpster Diving with the Stars. Definitely worth reading.
Profile Image for Evie.
471 reviews79 followers
March 9, 2016
"The secret to keeping brown sugar from getting hard is storing it with a marshmallow. I put the first batch of oatmeal raisin in the oven and then return my attention to Eddie. I turn on my radio. Dismemberment and freezing are the priorities."

The last collection of short stories I read was George Saunders' Tenth of December back in 2013. It's not a genre that I'm super comfortable reading. In fact, I've read more essay collections, which is strange to me as my reading diet mostly consists of fiction.

I loved the dark comedic tone of this whole book. Each story dared you not to laugh or say "Amen" because there is guaranteed to be something in here for everyone. Like the cover denotes, Ellis' writing is like a collage statement piece: relics of the outdated role of women bumped up against the modern, sometimes extreme, version. An example is of one housewife who dishes household advice while plotting how to rid herself of a cadaver, which I quoted above. Do I sense a bit of satirical humor?

The problem for me is that I loved half of the stories, my favorite being The Wainscoting War. I listened to the audiobook which included a full cast of character voices, which made it even funnier. How though does one rate a collection when not all the stories were hits? Who knows. What I do know is that I've already ordered a Hardcover edition just so I can read my favorite stories when I need a good laugh. I should probably also make a mental note to read more stories!
Profile Image for Diane S ☔.
4,901 reviews14.6k followers
October 19, 2015
3.5 At times amusing, catty, ironic, filled with irritating women, women who want their way regardless of the cost, and some with deeper meanings underneath the humor. I have three favorites, The Wainscoting War, a decorating war the goes too far. Dumpster diving with the stars, a comedic look at the publics penchant for reality TV shows. Lastly, The Fitter, the best bra fitter around who happens to be male and his wife who despite some major problems will do anything to hold onto her man. If I ever join a bookclub like the one in this book I would soon be brought up on charges.

A solid collection of stories but
Best to read a few a day, reading it the whole way through would be overkill.

ARC from publisher.
Profile Image for ♡ Kim ♡.
138 reviews428 followers
April 25, 2016
Ok, so this one started off strong. I was loving the sarcastic, witty humor, but then it fell flat. About two-thirds in, I debated on giving up but decided to push through because I did not want to give up on it so close to the end. I wish I could rate the short stories separately because a couple definitely earned 5 stars. For those stories, I wish I owned a copy opposed to borrowing from the library, so that I could highlight and tab pages to go back to when I need a pick me up - yes, they were that great! - and anyone that knows me knows I do not mark in my books.
Profile Image for Jenna.
455 reviews75 followers
January 24, 2016
Don't let my three-star review deter you from reading this book. It's plenty entertaining - witty, mischievous, and arch. The stories mostly involve wicked twists on feminine stereotypes, as in some of my favorites highlighted below:

"Dumpster Diving With the Stars" - what happens when a long-blocked author books a gig on a kind of reality show version of American Pickers, along with some celebrity scientologists, Mario Batali, a Napoleonic host nicknamed "F'in Tiny," and a sad Playmate partner who desperately misses her sick twin sister? And what role will John Lithgow play in it all? This was my favorite story because, along with the biting humor and satire, it also had a lot of warmth and heart, and was surprisingly moving.

"Hello! Welcome to Book Club!" - everyone knows book clubs can be CLIQUEY; what might a book club be like if it were instead CULT-Y? This was probably a second favorite story of mine.

"The Fitter" - what would it be like to have a husband whose spatial relationship skills make him the best bra fitter in the South? And under what exceptional circumstances might you be willing to relinquish your valued title as his sole employee?

"The Wainscoting War" - Old money vs new money vs mutant foster cats vs past and present decorating trends and one shared condo lobby, all told in epistolary email format.

Some lowlights:

There are a few other longer stories that didn't quite come together for me, and then there are a number of short flash fiction pieces that function as filler in between the longer stories. As much as I like microfiction, they really did feel like filler - and even with these sketches included, the book is still quite short.

Also, though the "wicked housewives" theme is fun, many of the stories were quite similar in tone and content, using the same type of voice/wit and frequent first person narration, so the collection perhaps straddles the line between coherent and redundant.

But, the exceptional stories mentioned above (especially the first) demonstrate that Ellis has great talent and imagination and is capable of generating a more substantial collection of short fiction with greater variety, development, and depth. I just think she needed a little bit more time to do the deed to its fullest potential - this book felt a bit rushed to market to me. Hence the three (point five) star review, but that being said, I wouldn't hesitate to recommend this quick and amusing read to anyone.



Profile Image for Esil.
1,118 reviews1,486 followers
January 7, 2016
3 1/2 stars. American Housewife is a short collection of short stories. In one way or another, the stories focus on contemporary American housewives. The women are either based in the South or in New York City. They have varying degrees of engagement with their domestic situations. They are often trying -- and rarely succeeding -- to write novels. In contrast, Helen Ellis sure can write. Her prose is clever, twisted, full of irony and attention catching. Her stories are edgy and often a tad surreal. The problem for me is that while I really appreciated Ellis' talent, her stories felt a bit cold because they favoured cleverness over real feelings. Some of the short stories -- more like vignettes -- were brilliant, and had me nodding in appreciation. Some of the longer stories lost me because they seemed too concept driven. Having said that, I'm happy to have read this collection. Ellis has real talent. Thank you to the publisher and Edelweiss for an opportunity to read an advance copy.
Profile Image for Rachael.
131 reviews55 followers
January 10, 2019
As an English housewife-of-sorts, I really loved this collection of short stories. I’ve been contemplating lately that a lot of the reading I do just isn’t fun any more. This is fun.

There’s satire, comedy, pathos and absurdity. Not every book needs to be beautifully lyrical or over analytical. Sometimes we need to laugh at ourselves and these stories generally worked for me on that score.

Not to mention the guide on how to be a cat, it’s perfect. Thank you Helen Ellis for the laughs you’ve given me.

ETA: after reading a lot of other reviews I’ve seen how divisive this collection is. Reading is subjective, after all, and a lot of these stories read as satire to me. I’ve seen comments about stepford wives and the like, but as far as I read into it, it isn’t an advocacy for, it’s a parody. I think Ellis tackles the desperate housewife state with a wit and irony that not many authors manage to achieve.
Profile Image for BirdiesBookshelves.
293 reviews17 followers
March 26, 2016
I loved every second of this. I couldn't help but cheer on all of these fierce females. Hilarious and dark at the same time, highly recommended!
Profile Image for Ammar.
486 reviews212 followers
December 18, 2016
The theme the southern housewives and the New York housewives
The book clubs
Shopping

Sentences as sharp as razors and nails
The last bit of every section leaves you wondering and thinking, sometimes in shock and sometimes laughing at what just happened.

We deal with wars among neighbours on the same floor... a decorating war that takes many other faces and shapes.

We read about celebrity dumpster divers and its satirical view about reality tv and pop culture.

The stories are refreshing like a cold slice of pie, yet at the same time they all have the same tone and voice... a repetition on theme. Wish they had more diversity that just the white American desperate housewife .

Profile Image for Petra X.
2,456 reviews35.6k followers
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June 27, 2016
I want to read this book. I don't read a lot of short stories but this book came to me in some publicity from my main supplier and sounded quite good. It's not released until 16th January but already has a 141 ratings and 62 reviews so it must be good. Right? Well hopefully.

I did review this book, or wrote about it anyway when I first added it as 'want to read'. However it was flagged after several months of it being up and Goodreads deleted it. I don't quite understand why it was against their ToS as it was essentially about the publisher, the member of the same name, ARCs and reviewers, not about the author, but there you go, Goodreads site, Goodreads rules.

They did send me a copy of the review for my files. Unfortunately they can't apparently let me have the 65 comments that followed the review and formed an interesting discussion. That mattered to me and there seems to be no way of saving comments on GR. To that end I am now saving reviews with long comment streams. Ctrl-S. Sooner or later I will find a way to automate that. Does anyone know how?
Profile Image for Laurie  (barksbooks).
1,937 reviews798 followers
February 10, 2017
This review and the rest of the crap I write can be seen @ my blog Bark's Book Nonsense . Stop by and say hey.

I grab almost every audio available to me and prefer to go in blind when I can. Sometimes this works and sometimes it doesn’t and I end up with nightmares (I’m pointing at you, Daddy Love by Joyce Carol Oates). When I started American Housewife, I had some vague memory of someone somewhere saying it was a memoir and I started reading it with glee because these people were horrid and I love nothing more than reading about horrible, snooty people doing horrible things to each other (and, if true, all the better!) but alas my brain failed me once again. I soon realized it’s actually a fictional collection of short stories, vignettes and “lessons” – mostly sarcastic lessons on how to be a proper southern lady. Lessons I obviously have no use for! None of them are true stories either. Ah well.

I’m not going to rehash all of the stories and such with a plot synopsis because I am lazy and mostly because I did not take notes. So off the top of my head, I’ll tell you a little about the stories that stuck with me long enough to be written down here.

“The Wainscotting War” was the first real short story in the collection and I thought it was the best. It should’ve been stuck somewhere in the middle because I kept expecting the rest of the tales to have the same snarky magic and, except for brief glimpses, they didn’t. It’s about two housewives who go to great lengths to out insult the other in an email war over redecorating a hallway. It’s wickedly dark and funny in the evilest of ways and I LOVED it.

“The Fitter” is about a woman who is married to the most wanted man in all the land. Wanted by the woman-folk, that is. He can look at a woman’s chest and instantly find her the perfect bra, one able to perk up the saddest pair of droopy breasts without surgery. He’s been able to do this since he was a kid which is kind of creepy, if you ask me, but he’s managed to make quite the living off of his magical skills, yet another reason the ladies are all after him. His current wife, also his assistant in the business, has to fend off the hussies vying for his attention. I felt for her, I truly did. It was a little sad but I’m not going to tell you why (unless you send me some chocolate).

“Welcome to Book Club” mostly annoyed me, truth be told. I thought it was trying just a little too hard to be witty and obnoxious and mostly succeeded in just being obnoxious. To be a part of this exclusive “book club” means you must give up your identity and . . . other things. The narration was good but the story didn’t work out for me.

“Dead Doormen” was ghostly, morbid and a little ghastly. That I can work with.

“Dumpster Diving with the Stars” nearly bored me to death. It was about some ridiculous reality tv show. It was overly long and not at all interesting or witty to me. Not helping matters was the monotonous narrator. I never thought it would end but fortunately it did.

Did I mention the stories are read by alternating narrators? That’s a very good thing in this case.

“Pageant Protection” is a twisted little story about a woman who makes it her mission to give pageant girls a lifestyle “do-over”.

“I Sold My Soul to Tampax” is the last story and I don’t think this is the title but it’ll have to do. My brain has shut down for the day. It’s about a writer who apparently didn’t read the fine print on her contract and faces what is probably every writer’s worst nightmare. It was pretty much all over the place and felt a little rushed and the protagonist seemed like a dimwit for allowing any of this to happen at all.

Most of the stories fall into the “entertaining at some point” category with only one that really stood out which is unfortunate seeing as it was the first actual story in the book and set me up to expect the rest to be even better. The others weren’t as nasty as I’d hoped and weren’t really “laugh out loud funny” but maybe my sense of humor has skedaddled off with what’s left of my memory. If you want to read about a bunch of awful ladies that have ugly thoughts, dark edges and haughty ways give it a go. You probably won’t like any of these people but you might like reading about them.

If nothing else, I learned that:

“Taxidermy is the new decoupage."

Who knew? Perhaps I’ll have to take it up in my old age. Looks like it could be useful!

 photo taxidermy is handy_zps6dpmsq6d.gif

Review also posted to my shiny new blog
Profile Image for Olive Fellows (abookolive).
778 reviews6,314 followers
March 11, 2025
How can I start a petition to get Helen Ellis to expand Dumpster Diving with the Stars into a full-length novel?

The rest of the stories in here were quite amusing, but I'm very serious: Dumpster Diving was a 5 star story all on its own.

Click here to hear more of my thoughts over on my Booktube channel, abookolive!

abookolive
Profile Image for Howard.
2,042 reviews116 followers
November 18, 2023
4.5 Stars for American Housewife (audiobook) by Helen Ellis read by Kathleen Mclnerney, Lisa Cordileone, Rebecca Lowman, and Dorothy Dillingham Blue.

This is a set of twisted tales from the prospective of the American housewife. For some reason I seemed to enjoy these stories more than most. They are kind of odd and true at the same time.
Profile Image for Melissa Rochelle.
1,481 reviews153 followers
February 12, 2019
This collection of short stories is chock-full of quirky, creepy, clever women. I can't imagine someone not seeing themselves in at least one of these characters. I read several stories multiple times and plan on reading a few of my favorites again once this gem of a collection is published in January. I think the shortest stories are my favorites -- they pack a big punch in just a couple of pages (especially "Southern Lady Code", "What I Do All Day", and "Take It From Cats").

I was reminded of Dept of Speculation by Jenny Offill -- perhaps it's how quick the stories zoom by or the voices of the narrators. But if you haven't read DoS, read it, too!

"What I Do All Day" -- hahahahahahaha. I understand this woman. I've definitely had some of these very thoughts myself. I mean, do you know how much arm strength it takes to flat iron course, wavy hair? A lot. It's exhausting. And husband's that vacuum up glitter truly are amazing.

"The Wainscoting War" -- Two stories in and I love this. The email exchange between Angela and Gail is so good and so full of beautifully wicked fake niceties.

"Dumpster Diving with the Stars" -- how did Ellis manage to fit an entire reality TV show season into one amazing short story (I kept thinking of Dancing with the Stars combined with Flea Market Flip because dumpster diving, upcycling, and dancing are so similar?)? The main character is a writer who also happens to be best friends with a super famous author (think Jennifer Weiner or Sophie Kinsella). Super famous friend convinced her to go on this show where she must make someone else's trash her treasure. Then there's all the other contestants with believable and/or ridiculous reasons for being there, the shady producers, and, well, it's just so good.

"Southern Lady Code" -- Yep

"Hello! Welcome to Book Club" -- loved it so much I read it twice (I may have read a few of these stories more than once). Joining this book club is about more than just reading the book or drinking wine. Join up and all your problems could be swept away...for a price.

"The Fitter" -- if a person like the fitter existed, I would be there in a second. Not to marry him, but to find the best bra of my life.

"How to be a Grown-Ass Lady" -- if this is how to be a grown-ass lady, then I am not quite there. A few things I need to work on include not putting my phone on a restaurant table and getting fitted for bras every year.

"How to be a Patron of the Arts" -- abandon your dreams and buy a tinfoil hat, but call it art. Excellent advice.

"Dead Doormen" -- this lady must live in the same building as Angela and Gail. Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs in this prewar penthouse!

"Pageant Protection" -- they keep getting zanier!

"Take It From Cats" -- cats are the coolest critters and this story proves that we have much to learn from our feline companions.

"My Novel is Brought to You by the Good People at Tampax" -- oh goodness, the stuff of nightmares! Product placement times a billion. The horror! Corporate sponsors in books. (I kept thinking of James Patterson/James Frey/book packaging while reading this one...is sponsorship the next step?)

BONUS LISTEN: “How To Check Out a Library Book Like a Grown-Ass Lady”

Thanks to the publisher for the advance reading copy.
Profile Image for Book Riot Community.
1,026 reviews292k followers
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June 2, 2016
Since I work from home and have caregiving responsibilities for my family, I feel in some ways a kinship to the American housewives in Helen Ellis’ short story collection. Ellis is a gifted writer and somehow manages to unify the diverse experiences of women who stay at home. Her collection is at once hysterical as it is bittersweet. And at under 190 pages in a petite size, American Housewife is a satisfying single-sitting read. File this one away for your next readathon.

— Sarah S. Davis


from The Best Books We Read In May 2016: http://bookriot.com/2016/06/01/riot-r...
Profile Image for Jim.
Author 7 books2,085 followers
August 17, 2016
I'll be damned if I know why this is in my queue. This is a chick book (I'm not) & I don't indulge in mind altering drugs. I must have been in a really quirky mood. Since the alternative is aliens or early onset dementia, I'll go with quirky.

What I do all day -- is just that. Pointless, just a quick outline of a day in the life of a boring woman. She doesn't even have a pet. Not very funny. Not a good way to start. 2 stars

The wainscoting war -- Emails show just how a common area between 2 apartments can be a war zone. Fun & funny from a distance, pure horror to be involved in. Reminds me of a war of fences I saw once. Glad they're not my neighbors. 3 stars

Dumpster diving with the stars -- A weird take on reality TV. I'm sure I missed some references, but it was still fun. I really like John Lithgow especially since I listened to him read his autobiography Drama: An Actor's Education. 3 stars

Southern lady code -- Funny & true list! Super narration for it, too. 4 stars.

Hello! Welcome to the book club -- Just weird, but funny at times. Didn't really hold together for me, though. 2 stars

The fitter -- is about a man who can fit ladies to the perfect bra. While I don't wear one, I have a very well endowed wife & a grown daughter, so I'm probably as familiar as a man can be with the struggle. On top of that, I love female breasts, so this one gets high marks simply for that. The underlying story was as sad as the glib one was funny. 4 stars

How to be a grown-ass lady -- Another list that reminded me of a Seinfeld sketch. I never cared for Seinfeld. 2 stars

How to be a patron of the arts -- see above. 2 stars

Dead doormen -- was just horribly weird. I'm not sure what to make of it. I'll give it 3 stars for the Twilight Zone quality.

Pageant protection -- When is kidnapping a kid a good thing? This will tell you. 3 stars

Take it from cats -- Another list that reminded me of a Seinfeld sketch. I never cared for Seinfeld. 2 stars

My novel is brought to you by the good people at Tampax -- A recurring theme in many of these stories is how tough it is being a writer. This cranks it up to absolutely horrible & hilarious heights. Be very careful when taking an advance! LOL! 4 stars

If you live in the city & are a female, you'll probably like this more than I did. That I liked it at all is a testament both to the writing & the narration.
Profile Image for Bonnie G..
1,776 reviews418 followers
January 26, 2022
This book was very well-reviewed by critics I respect, but I feel like they read a different book. To say that Ellis lacks depth understates the case profoundly. It would be the equivalent of saying Donald Trump needs a new conditioner. Every character is a parody of a type, an anti-feminist trope. Bitchy Southern housewives, aged New York society matrons, rich white New York It patronesses of the arts, women with professional accomplishments and concomitant barren wombs. Ellis is obsessed with her decision to live off of her wealthy husband while writing and not publishing. She vacillates between bragging and defensiveness, but the obsession is there in every piece. Insult to injury, the stock characters don't even get into interesting situations.

This is a panoply of story ideas set out in lazily constructed short stories, and a series of quippy lists. Some of the story ideas are good, and some of the quips sparkle (earning this 2 instead of 1 star from me.) The failure is in the execution. The do and don't lists are....lists. They are not stories. Same goes for the nasty women giving you character sketches of other women -- not stories. The few times she actually does some of the work to turn her ideas into a story, it rarely works. The best story is "Dumpster Diving with the Stars." It has some really affecting moments, and some funny situations, but in the end it was just to sweet for me even though I too love John Lithgow and was happy he came out looking so good. In this story there is a Playboy Playmate character who says things are "cuuuuuuuuuuute"; this is a sign of her sweet emptiness, but the story is also cuuuuuuuute, so maybe that is a sign of Ellis' sweet emptiness? (Note: Elis calls the character a Bunny." Notwithstanding the title "Bunnies Next Door," Bunnies are waitresses, not centerfolds.) Another fleshed out story, "My Novel Brought to you by the Good People at Tampax", is mostly unreadable. It is a ridiculous dystopian tale about art being commoditized, and it doesn't even have the fun quips to save it. Skip this one and use the time saved to read something better.
Profile Image for Scott.
2,210 reviews263 followers
July 13, 2019
3.5 stars

"'You are so bad!' is Southern Lady Code for: That is the tackiest thing I've ever heard, and I am delighted that you shared it with me." -- Helen Ellis, page 74

An eclectic collection of a dozen short stories and/or vignettes from the author of the very funny Southern Lady Code from earlier this year. (This inspiration for that recent book is likely to have come from the brief 'Southern Lady Code' essay in the middle of Housewife.) Ellis skillfully boomerangs from long-form comedy ('Dumper Diving With the Stars,' about a fake-but-plausible reality TV show, and 'Hello! Welcome to the Book Club,' which lovingly trashes the folks in those groups) to lite sci-fi / fantasy tales comparable to the works of Richard Matheson or Rod Serling ('Dead Doormen' and 'My Novel is Brought to You by the Good People at Tampax') and then back to straight-ahead modern day humor ('The Wainscoting War,' about an escalating e-mail message feud between two stubborn neighbors in an urban apartment building). There were more hits than misses in the bunch, and there was occasionally a poignant or clever kernel of truth amidst the many chuckles.
37 reviews172 followers
October 28, 2016
I found some of the stories in this collection quite entertaining, but the majority of them were lost on me.
Profile Image for Kayla.
381 reviews50 followers
August 31, 2017
3.5/5
I liked how some of the stories each had a character who was a writer in some way. And I did like the author's writing in general, just some stories were a lot better than others. * means the stories I most enjoyed and/or found most interesting.

What I Do All Day - 2.5/5
The Wainscoting War - 1/5
Dumpster Diving with the Stars - 3.75/5
Southern Lady Code - 1/5
*Hello! Welcome to Book Club - 3.5/5
*The Fitter - 3.5/5
How To Be a Grown-Ass Lady - 3/5
How To Be A Patron of the Arts - 2.5/5
*Dead Doorman - 4/5
*Pageant Protection 3.75/5
*Take It From Cats - 5/5
*My Novel Is Brought To By The Good People At Tampax - 4/5 (reminds me of a black mirror episode)

Average rating: 3.1/5

Overall, quite enjoyable but I think I would've enjoyed more if I hadn't gotten in a reading slump and didn't read this book for over a week.
Profile Image for David.
777 reviews376 followers
January 28, 2016
These are a small collection of perfectly sharp, short stories written by your most clever Tumblr friend. An escalating war on interior design, magical bra fitters, the novel sponsored by Tampax and a sadly, all-too-plausible reality show called Dumpster Diving with the Stars. A light bit of confection that was altogether a hoot to read.
Profile Image for Jerrie.
1,032 reviews157 followers
January 31, 2019
This is meant to be a sarcastic look at the American wife, but I didn’t find many of the characters or situations that funny or relatable. The humor was often pretty low-brow and the characters more caricature, giving this the feel of a bad sit-com. There was maybe one story that I liked. At least it was short.
Profile Image for Naksed.
2,220 reviews
July 4, 2024
In The Wainscoting War, a series of email exchanges between neighbors in an uptight Manhattan Co-op reminded me ruefully of past battles with HOAs or irascible neighbors. Maybe, like Angela.Chastain_Peters@smythe-peterspartners.com, I should have redecorated our common hallway with tiger's blood and a rug made from a rare breed of oversize felines to get my message across more succintly?

In Hello! Welcome to Book Club, Mary Beth the hostess cheerfully skewers the literary tastes of her club members, like fans of bodice-rippers (throwing twelve layers of underskirts up over a heroine's face and plowing her like a cotton field is known as the main character getting her "just desserts") and YA (I'm an orphan! I'm a mind reader! I'm biracial! I'm gay! When I get out of high school, I'll move to New York City, where I'll find others like me, and then I'll be happy and I will have it all: a career, a family, good teeth, and takeout Chinese)

In my favorite story, Dumpster Diving with the Stars, an unsuccessful writer enters a reality show where she competes with celebrities such as Mario Batali, John Lithgow, a frail playboy bunny, and a Scientologist movie star couple. The goal? Find the best hidden gem hidden among the trash heaps of Middle-America's garage sale lawns. Along the way, she reflects on her always unlucky timing. How was she to know her plantation book would be completed when there were already two other plantation books on the bestseller list? Meanwhile, her uber-successful best friend Madeline writes about smart, overweight women with overbearing skinny mothers who have numerous Spanx accidents and spend their nights eating ice-cream from the carton in front of black and white movies before finally learning at the end of the book that when they learn to love themselves, men will too.

It is rare to find a book where your admittedly warped and absurdist mind is so in synch with the writer. American Housewife was that book for me. Kudos to the narrator of the audio book who gets just the right tone for every single character in the many stories included, from two-faced Southern belles to the cold, hostile, "Hal 2000" voice of a Tampax corporation representative.
Profile Image for Jill.
Author 2 books2,035 followers
December 2, 2015
Take a look at the American Housewife on the book’s cover and at first glance, it’s reminiscent of the artwork you’d see in the 1950s – from Betty Crocker, for example. But view closer and it’s obvious that this housewife has ATTITUDE, despite her hair curlers and Emory board. You can see it in her skimpy bikini panties, her bright orange nightshirt, her poise.

American Housewife has attitude. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. Take the first story: “I hop in the shower and assure myself that behind every good woman is a little back fat. I cry because I don’t have the upper-arm strength to flatiron my hair. I mascara my gray roots. I smoke my eyes. I paint my lips. I drown my sorrows with Chanel No. 5.”

It’s fun to read but unfortunately, Ms. Ellis comes back to this type of sentence structure – and this type of humor – in way too many of the 12 short stories. After a while, this reader wanted her to push harder in her wry commentaries on what it means to be a woman in America.

There are some really notable exceptions. My Novel is Brought to You by Tampax, the last story, is a laugh-out-loud, wince-worthy look at corporate sponsorship and e-promotion efforts (in this case, of an author’s book). It alludes to a “Jesus Thesaurus which replaces explicit sexual language with church words.” And it portrays Tampax as a sponsor that will go to any lengths for the bottom-line (substitute any company).

The Wainscoting War is an epistolary story in which two women who share a co-op floor go from a semi-polite thank-you to an all-out warfare. The Fitter is a surprisingly sweet story of a bra fitter whose ill wife picks out her successor. Dumpster Diving with the Stars takes on the dark side of reality shows with a piercing, but somewhat derivative, look at an author who pairs with a ditzy Playboy bunny with a soft heart.

American Housewife is a breezy, fun read with some great laughs. But underneath these light-hearted tales is a serious message: do not underestimate today’s women.
Profile Image for This Kooky Wildflower Loves a Little Tea and Books.
1,063 reviews246 followers
October 8, 2017
3.5

Short story collection filled with cynicism, wit, and diabolical charm. While I'm not a Southerner, I found myself engrossed in the drama presented. Some of the shorts fit more as how-to guides, like "How To Be a Grown-Ass Lady". While others bite at the veneer rich housewives enjoy, like "Dead Doormen."

Overall, the book's worth a read. You'll laugh at ridiculous and morbid rivalries ("The Wainscoting War"). You'll feel a bit sad ("The Fitter"). You'll wonder about book clubs ("Hello! Welcome to the Book Club").

While two of the longer stories failed to grab me and sometimes the stories blur in content and tone, wicked housewives amuse me. I guess I'm easy.

Verdict: 3.5/5 marriages without prenups.
Profile Image for Freesiab BookishReview.
1,102 reviews52 followers
April 28, 2016
On point and wickedly funny! An excellent collection of stories about different types of women. More of a modern housewife but something everyone can relate to, I think. I thought it would all be about women with kids but it wasn't. Some of the characters were very specific wives but others were just women who were married. I hope that distinction makes sense. All the way around a strong viewpoint on women's roles in the home or in society. I loved it from beginning to end and I think any woman could identify with something in this book.
Profile Image for Amy.
995 reviews61 followers
April 8, 2020
[edit 4/6/2020: the essay previous linked is no longer available on Tin House except in an audio recording so I've swapped it into the link]
Update 4/8/2020: reread and realized I liked every story. They're more than a little subversive (and likely tread the line a little to close for what is ok for humor) but I laughed at every one. My favorite is either "Dumpster Diving With the Stars" or "Dead Doormen" but I also think "The Fitter" is pitch perfect dark humor.
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if you nodded and cringed over the "On Pandering" discussion last year, this book feels like the antidote: these smart, hilarious stories are deeply feminine - strong, daring and irreverent. They are brilliant and deserve awards; which are likely to be handed over by some man adding an undermining joke about this being 'chick' fare. Which would be both getting and missing the point. Yeah, you're right, this isn't written for you. It's not written in awe of Steinback and Irving and Wallace... or to reap their male readers; it's written for the brilliant women who are going to read and recognize themselves (or their secret selves) in these stories. And any man who chooses not to read them because of that will miss out. And we could care less.

I don't know why but it seems that short story books these days aren't leading with their top stories, as if they have to build to greatness. (an exception I can think of is Bobcat) I wish editors would get together and swap that around because honestly, those of us who don't regularly read short stories, often make snap judgments about the book in the first chapter. If you don't open well, you might not keep us. American Housewife doesn't make you wait too long since by the third story I was sure it was going to be 'my favorite' and then they just stayed great or got better from there. But I wish it had been a winner from the get-go. That's really the only reason this isn't a 5-star. Otherwise, I highly recommend this set. Helen Ellis, you're awesome!
24 reviews34 followers
November 4, 2015
Snarky social commentary with a flair for the bizarre, Helen Ellis’ American Housewife is brutally hilarious. It’s written from multiple perspectives, in various voices ranging from dueling, vicious housewives to a leader of a cult-like book club, to a struggling author held hostage by Tampax. These stories rip apart the manicured, corseted, perfectly polished picture of an American housewife and unleash the pent-up fury resulting from suffocating social norms and mores.
Ellis slices through the feminine ideal like a sharp knife through a buttercream cake. Her characters shred the Suzy Homemaker facade like acrylic nails on silk. You will laugh at her crazy imagination and her witty insights about today’s American culture. You will laugh because what she reveals is true; our society prescribes roles for women and they are itching to break from the mold. She does not necessarily mock the housewife herself, or femininity in general, but rather the traditions that constrain and impede modern women. If quality satire alone could dismantle the patriarchy, this book would be Queen of the world.

(and thank you to Doubleday for the arc!)
Profile Image for Sara.
1,202 reviews61 followers
April 1, 2017
These stories are funny, sad, and horrifying. Many of them deal with psychotic housewives who really need to get a job! Another theme running through these stories is that of a writer with some serious writer's block. I imagine that's a little tongue in cheek from the author.

I loved the email exchange from The Wainscoting War, though that did get very strange at the end. I enjoyed John Lithgow in Dumpster Diving With the Stars. Hello! Welcome to Book Club was frightening.

Which begs the question, can any of these women escape? And escape seems necessary to preserve (or cultivate) normalcy for this cast of characters. Do they even want to escape? Should I escape? How normal am I?

I liked the words of wisdom in How To Be a Grown-ass Lady and Take It From Cats.

I'm assuming Tampax didn't sue her for the final story. Hoping that in real life, they didn't have to resort to all those tactics to get a final manuscript out of Helen Ellis.

This was fun and a real quick read. I'm not much of a short story girl but these definitely entertained.
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