Ready, Set, Breathe: Practicing Mindfulness with Your Children for Fewer Meltdowns and a More Peaceful Family

by Carla Naumburg

How can you prepare for and prevent your kids’ inevitable meltdowns? Ready, Set, Breathe will show you and your child how to focus, calm down, and live in the present moment. Being a parent is stressful, and when your child has a meltdown, it can be difficult to keep cool—let alone help your child to calm down. Ready, Set, Breathe offers real solutions to help you both deal with stress using everyday mindfulness games, activities, rituals, and habits. Designed for children ages 2-10 years old, this book is fun, engaging, and effective.

As any parent knows, children aren’t always receptive to what you say. Parental advice is often ignored or perceived as intrusive; and trying to get your kid to calm down and breathe can turn into an unpleasant power struggle in which you feel powerless and frustrated; and your child can feel nagged or bullied. The good news is that it doesn’t have to be this way. In this book, you’ll learn to teach mindfulness to your child in the most enjoyable and realistic way possible. You’ll also learn skills to help yourself stay calm when your child does act up—especially in public.

This is a must-read for all parents!

Genres: Parenting, Nonfiction, Childrens, Health, Self Help

224 pages, Paperback

First published December 1, 2015

About the author

Carla Naumburg, PhD, is a clinical social worker, writer, and speaker. She is the author of four parenting books, and lives outside of Boston with her family.

Reviews

[Kobietaczytajaca · Rating 4 out of 5]

Jako mama trójki dzieci zmagam się z wieloma problemami, które często i gęsto powodują kłótnie między dzieciakami, jednak od pewnego czasu zainteresowałam się metodą uważności, która po przetestowaniu sprawdza. Autorka w swojej książce-poradniku mówi o Mindfulness, czyli metodzie uważności oraz skupieniu się na tym, co jest Tu I Teraz. Kiedy nasze dziecko rozrabia, pyskuje czy jest nieznośne wielu rodziców zaczyna się denerwować, krzyczeć, stosować kary itp. Pani Carla podpowiada nam jak z tym walczyć, najpierw musimy zacząć od siebie, bo kiedy my się pieklimy dzieci to wyczuwają i nasze emocje przenoszą się na nie, no i awantura gotowa. Każdy rodzic powinien odpuścić, odejść, by się zastanowić jak ten problem rozwiązać a „nie dolewać oliwy do ognia". Autorka radzi wtedy spróbować metody oddechów i uwierzcie albo nie u mnie to działa. Pamiętajcie, że trzeba też przygotować się na to, że dana metoda, opisana w książce może nie zadziałać na Wasze dziecko, ale nie zrażajcie się, w tej książce jest tak sporo różnych i różnistych przykładów i metod opanowywania emocji, że każdy znajdzie coś dla swojego dziecka. Kiedy mamy problem ze skupieniem u dzieci, wyolbrzymianiem problemów albo chcemy stworzyć jeszcze większą więź to ten poradnik nam w tym pomoże. Problemy dzieci dla nas dorosłych są małe i błahe, ale dla nich są ogromną przeszkodą często powodują bujki między rodzeństwem bo nie radzą sobie z ogromem emocji jaka im przy tym towarzyszy, my rodzice możemy nad tym zapanować, bo o emocjach powinniśmy rozmawiać, ale w sposób spokojny. Powiem szczerze, że sporo z niej wyciągnęłam i będę do niej wracać za każdym razem, gdy pojawi się jakiś problem, wy też możecie panować nad swoimi emocjami i uczyć tego samego swoich dzieci, te metody sprawdzają się i dodatkowo zapanuje spokój w rodzinie. Polecam 8/10.

[Steve · Rating 4 out of 5]

So it's cheating a little bit to say I read this.
Like a lot of these self-help / advice style books, you don't really need to read every word to get the gist and enjoy the benefits. But I want to add a review to hopefully encourage other parents to get more mindfulness in their lives, and to teach their kids the skills of meditation and mindfulness. I feel like I would have been a much happier kid (and certainly a happier teenager) had I been able to achieve mindfulness. And this book won't necessarily provide the magic wand to make you a super-meditator, but I appreciate that the author admits her own shortcomings and doesn't assume you are able to meditate on the first try.
Also, she suggests keeping kids away from screens, but after reading this book, I discovered the mindfulness video exercises on Cosmic Kids Yoga. They are a great companion to this book. A bubbly and amazingly un-selfconscious woman named Jamie with a fabulous British accent leads kids through mindfulness exercises (as well as meditations and yoga routines).

[Delta · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm not a parent, but I think the information in this book would be highly accessible to adults, children, new readers, and mindfulness pros. The language is simple and presented in a logical way. The suggestions and activities are easy to do and easy to scale as you and your child progress in the practice.

**I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.**

[Katie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Better late than never. I do wish I'd read this when my people were a little younger.

Useful, practical, not too preachy.

[Jackie Lee · Rating 4 out of 5]

Another down to earth, wonderfully accessible book on how to bring more mindfulness into our families. Carla provides a framework for mindfulness that is easy to understand and even more realistically implemented in busy family life. Plenty of concrete examples and exercises. I only wish I'd had this book when my kiddo was younger!

[Erica · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thoughtful, practical and funny. A good, easy read with tips that I'll come back to. I like that the author is humble -- she's not a perfect parent either! Bonus is that my 10-year-old was intrigued by the cover and kept trying to read over my shoulder.

[Lars · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's a helpful and important book, with some concrete strategies sprinkled throughout, but so much of it is about the abstract ideas and general benefits of mindfulness and being present that it's not a slam dunk. In terms of its usefulness, I don't want to speak for anyone else, but I was already into mindfulness before I started the book; that's why I started the book. It's hard to imagine a skeptical reader starting a book like this, but I guess some must.

So if you want to know a lot about why to be mindful and to practice meditation for yourself, and to a lesser extent with a child, and to get a few various strategies for doing so, this is a good book to read. Otherwise, it seems like the Calm book for kids is a little easier and full of practical ideas. Other options include Sitting Still Like a Frog and Planting Seeds, but I haven't read those yet.

[Shannon Hunsel · Rating 3 out of 5]

Pretty simple. It really just hammers home the idea of slowing down and teaching your children to be present. Well, not really teaching. Children know how to be present. More like letting them be present and encouraging them to continue to develop that skill. I liked that it had a lot of practical exercises.

[Susan Wright · Rating 4 out of 5]

Most of the information presented wasn't "new", however it is presented in an easy to read/understand format with relatable stories from the author. Each chapter has applicable exercises to do as a parent and with a child. Highly recommend having this book on hand and bookmarking useful pages!

[Samantha Melendez · Rating 3 out of 5]

A very easy to read and understand informational source for not only parents, but for anyone that wants to start practicing mindfulness. Easy to pick up and put down with the different sections in the chapters.

[Jessica Reeves · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is has great basic information on mindfulness and is full of tools for the proverbial parenting toolkit. I also found the resource section to be quite good.

[Samantha Van Blerkom · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'd recommend this book to absolutely any parent or person who works with children.

[Andrea · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love her writing. This book is useful for everyone, not just parents. Like all of Nauburg's books, I feel like I can deploy her suggestions right away.

[Kari Napier · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very informative and I am excited to put this advice to use!!

[Jennifer Hennek · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good for those just starting parenting or mindfulness. Affirming to those who have some practices already in their lives. Lots of practical practices are explained.

[Javi Carretero · Rating 4 out of 5]

Nothing extremely surprising but good food for thought. It is worth its reading.

[Lea Ann · Rating 3 out of 5]

I received this book for free from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. I've been neglecting my NetGalley shelf until recently and I'm trying to work through those books and have come up with a few surprises lately.

This book suffered from a busy couple weeks over the labor day holiday and beyond. Ironically, as I read this parenting book about mindfulness and meditation, I was constantly interrupted by my sweet darling, but also sometimes exhausting children. So I never felt like I got into a flow for reading this book.

The book is based on the principles of mindfulness - rather, noticing things and being curious about them in a compassionate way. I've tried several of the mindfulness exercises described in the book with my kids so far and with good results. For example, our short 3 1/2 mile drive from daycare to home in the evening is usually punctuated by extreme whining and crying. Hungry kids who have missed Mom and Dad all day are letting out their emotions as we drive home. It's a short 15 minute trip but it always seems to take ages because of all the crying.

So on a recent trip home I decided to employ a noticing technique before the crying started in earnest. I asked the kids to describe the cars around us and asked them which colors they saw. Then I asked them to tell me what colors were missing. We then made it a mission to find those missing colors. Ever since that drive, when we are in the car driving anywhere, the kids are ecstatic when they see - notice - a rare colored car. (As a side note, God bless those of you driving yellow cars, it's their favorite). It's ratcheted down the amount of crying that happens in the car and for that I am grateful.

My 4 1/2 year old is a real hitting machine. When he's made he screams and hits stuff, even people, mostly his sister. So I've started some of the noticing techniques with him so he can identify what is going on with him. He gets a real kick out of me asking him if "Grumpy Pete" has shown up at the dinner table. And I don't make judgments on Grumpy Pete, just that he's grumpy, and that I'd like to see if Hungry Pete is available for dinner. My son thinks this is hilarious, but it also reinforces the mindfulness lesson that our emotions can be changed, by us, and by our recognizing that those emotions exist. It's been a great exercise for us and has helped defuse some potential meltdowns.

Overall I still thought Peaceful Parent Happy Children was more sound. I found this one a bit repetitive and too unmoored from actual scientific study, but since I'm getting results with the practices, I can't actually complain. I don't consider this a foundational parenting book, but it definitely is a useful tool.

[Miranda Phillips]

I found this book really helpful as a parent, and for my own well-being generally. I found especially appealing and useful the definition of mindfulness that Dr. Naumburg offers: "noticing what is happening right here and now, in a friendly and curious way, and then choosing what to do next." As Dr. Naumburg explains with humility and humor, mindfulness by this definition may sound simple, but can be very hard to do consistently. So she breaks down her definition into sub-goals (noticing, being in the moment, being friendly and curious, and choosing) -- each of which needs practice, and she offers in each of those categories a treasure trove of fun exercises gathered from parents who have found these helpful with their kids. As someone who's been practicing for years and but still learned valuable new things from this book, as a parent but also for my own practice, I'd recommend it to parents and non-parents alike; and to newbies and those already familiar with mindfulness.

[Mouse · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's worth reading, I mean really, what have you to lose? Is it going to solve the problem of a breakdown... and all your problems.... probably not. But for me and my little one, it helped us learn together about the concept of mindfulness. Since we read this, my little one has actually taken it upon himself to meditate and breathe at times when things are getting a little rough. It did instill the concept in his head and for that I'm grateful. Now I just need to keep working on it with him.

[Lisa · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a great book on the basics of what mindfulness is. It applies to parenting, but offers a foundation for anyone who wants to learn. Her definition: Mindfulness is about noticing what is happening right here and now, in a friendly and curious way, then choosing what to do next. I especially loved the first half of the book, which was heavier on philosophy. The second half was more focused on ideas for application to children. One of the author's key points is that it's not enough to just teach kids about mindfulness, but to practice it with them, which, of course, is true of any character trait or habit you'd like your child to have. Always easier said than done!

[Ellie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is THE book for anyone who works with kids, has kids, or ever was a kid. Practical, yet playful, suggestions for parents and kids - written with heart, understanding, and wisdom. The author shares her personal stories along with knowledge and experience from many other likeminded thinkers and practitioners. It is a good, fluid read for busy parents - you can pick it up and put it down because the chapters are organized and digestible (even for exhausted parents at night after the kids go to bed).

[Denise Morse · Rating 3 out of 5]

Overall this book had some very useful and helpful tips and exercises for being more mindful in your own life and trying to model that for your children. The first half of the book was a little slow and I struggled to find how to make the suggestions work. The second half of the book was easier to consume and even start to implement. I am going to try and be more mindful, more aware of what is happening as I get angry and frustrated with situations.

[Sherri]

There were some great topics discussed in here, and I think I will do better to revisit this book when I've gained more in my own mindfulness practice and my kid is a little older (the cover does say for kids aged 3 to 10.) He just doesn't have the emotional maturity to try any of these at this point. Will update my review when the book is more applicable.

[Bence · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amazing self-contained introductory book to mindfulness itself, worth to read even if you do not have children (or do not intend to teach them mindfulness). On top of that, very useful, specific tips and exercises for sharing the basics of mindfulness with the young ones.

[greysaleks · Rating 2 out of 5]

Trochę nietrafione tłumaczenie tytułu na polski (na co wcześniej nie zwróciłam niestety uwagi), bo z napadami złości to niewiele miało wspólnego, raczej cała książka poświęcona jest uważności. I pewnie to jest okej, ale nie tego oczekiwałam, gdy po nią sięgałam.

[Rebecca · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked the ideas and recommendations in this book, both for adults and kids. Now to make sure to implement them...

[Emily Urke · Rating 3 out of 5]

Being a therapist myself, I found the information and techniques to be pretty basic. Great information for the layperson.

[Sylwia Szeliga · Rating 5 out of 5]

Świetna, zwłaszcza dla rodziców którym nie jest obojętne szczęście swojego dziecka i którzy nie maja zamiaru go szkolić a wprowadzić mądrze w świat

[Sarah]

Good book, but the information is nothing new to me. Lost interest halfway through and returned to the library.