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I Stand Corrected: How Teaching Western Manners in China Became Its Own Unforgettable Lesson
A fascinating fusion of memoir, manners, and cultural history from a successful businesswoman well versed in the unique challenges of working in contemporary China.
During the course of a career that has, quite literarily, moved her around the world, no country has fascinated Eden Collinsworth more than China, where she has borne witness to its profound transformation. After numerous experiences there that might best be called "unusual" by Western standards, she concluded that despite China's growing status as a world economy, businessmen in mainland China were fundamentally uncomfortable in the company of their Western counterparts. This realization spawned an idea to work collaboratively with a major Chinese publisher on a Western etiquette guide, which went on to became a bestseller and prompted a branch of China's Ministry of Education to suggest that she create a curriculum for the school system. In I Stand Corrected, Collinsworth tells the entertaining and insightful story of the year she spent living among the Chinese while writing a book featuring advice on such topics as the non-negotiable issue of personal hygiene, the rules of the handshake, and making sense of foreigners.
During the course of a career that has, quite literarily, moved her around the world, no country has fascinated Eden Collinsworth more than China, where she has borne witness to its profound transformation. After numerous experiences there that might best be called "unusual" by Western standards, she concluded that despite China's growing status as a world economy, businessmen in mainland China were fundamentally uncomfortable in the company of their Western counterparts. This realization spawned an idea to work collaboratively with a major Chinese publisher on a Western etiquette guide, which went on to became a bestseller and prompted a branch of China's Ministry of Education to suggest that she create a curriculum for the school system. In I Stand Corrected, Collinsworth tells the entertaining and insightful story of the year she spent living among the Chinese while writing a book featuring advice on such topics as the non-negotiable issue of personal hygiene, the rules of the handshake, and making sense of foreigners.
272 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2014
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 57 reviews
October 11, 2014
I Stand Corrected is a lighthearted breezy memoir, slim in size and full of self-deprecating humor, but author Eden Collinsworth goes off on a lot of tangents with anecdotes about her careers, her friends, her travels elsewhere in the world, her marriage that ended in divorce, and her much adored son, so that there’s less about teaching etiquette in China than I expected, even though that is the theme she keeps coming back to.
Reading the book is like chatting with a slightly scattered, well traveled and fairly knowledgeable friend, who tells you interesting things about the places she’s visited, but can’t resist including funny side stories. If you’d like to read a little bit about China, or world travels, or how manners and customs differ by culture, but you don’t want anything too long or heavy, this book would be a good choice.
Reading the book is like chatting with a slightly scattered, well traveled and fairly knowledgeable friend, who tells you interesting things about the places she’s visited, but can’t resist including funny side stories. If you’d like to read a little bit about China, or world travels, or how manners and customs differ by culture, but you don’t want anything too long or heavy, this book would be a good choice.
August 9, 2016
→ Lesson 27:
Deliver on your promises. If the subtitle of your book says the book is about teaching Western manners, that's what your book should be about—don't substitute a wandering memoir about your travels and professional experiences (as interesting as those may be).
To be clear: I enjoyed this.* Collinsworth's writing is witty; she has travelled extensively and had more interesting, and unexpected, adventures than I can dream of. It's just, well, this isn't a memoir about teaching Western manners in China. It's memoir-meets-etiquette-guide with a hint, at the end, that Collinsworth did end up teaching some etiquette classes.
Some odd choices, though. There's some culture-bashing that mostly feels good-natured, but...not always. (As impolite as the French sometimes appear... (209)) Although Collinsworth is meant to be teaching Western manners, she includes an additional lesson on business politesse outside of China (209)...about the 'Arab world', which is not traditionally considered part of the West...and she introduces this section with a long story about living in Paris that has nothing to do with anything except that her editor in China once asked about the time she'd spent in Paris. Obviously there's nothing wrong with talking about how etiquette differs by location/culture or her time in Paris...but neither seemed to fit right, adding to the scattered feel of the book.
Funny enough but lacks cohesion. Rather wish she'd just gone straight for the travel or living-abroad memoir.
*With reservations. What was with that bit about the trans* woman?
Deliver on your promises. If the subtitle of your book says the book is about teaching Western manners, that's what your book should be about—don't substitute a wandering memoir about your travels and professional experiences (as interesting as those may be).
To be clear: I enjoyed this.* Collinsworth's writing is witty; she has travelled extensively and had more interesting, and unexpected, adventures than I can dream of. It's just, well, this isn't a memoir about teaching Western manners in China. It's memoir-meets-etiquette-guide with a hint, at the end, that Collinsworth did end up teaching some etiquette classes.
Some odd choices, though. There's some culture-bashing that mostly feels good-natured, but...not always. (As impolite as the French sometimes appear... (209)) Although Collinsworth is meant to be teaching Western manners, she includes an additional lesson on business politesse outside of China (209)...about the 'Arab world', which is not traditionally considered part of the West...and she introduces this section with a long story about living in Paris that has nothing to do with anything except that her editor in China once asked about the time she'd spent in Paris. Obviously there's nothing wrong with talking about how etiquette differs by location/culture or her time in Paris...but neither seemed to fit right, adding to the scattered feel of the book.
Funny enough but lacks cohesion. Rather wish she'd just gone straight for the travel or living-abroad memoir.
*With reservations. What was with that bit about the trans* woman?
July 23, 2016
This is nothing like what I expected it to be. I envisioned a missionary person running over to China to teach them Western manners. It was actually a woman hired by a Chinese publisher to write a book about how to conduct professional business interactions with Westerners.
It delved into the Chinese not liking to make eye contact and the Western viewpoint that no eye contact signaled dishonesty. Westerners also do not like people to spit on the table, talk in loud voices and asking them how much money they have. They do like people who practice good personal hygiene,
In between the snippets from the book she is writing, the author offers some history of China that has had impact on the Chinese etiquette and the development of the people's manners. This was quite interesting. She also drops in bits about her own travel which may or may not have something to do with text. Some of it is just bewildering in why it is being shared. She also shares a great deal on how the government is running the country from getting permits to publishing books.
Still it's a nice pleasant book about another culture.
It delved into the Chinese not liking to make eye contact and the Western viewpoint that no eye contact signaled dishonesty. Westerners also do not like people to spit on the table, talk in loud voices and asking them how much money they have. They do like people who practice good personal hygiene,
In between the snippets from the book she is writing, the author offers some history of China that has had impact on the Chinese etiquette and the development of the people's manners. This was quite interesting. She also drops in bits about her own travel which may or may not have something to do with text. Some of it is just bewildering in why it is being shared. She also shares a great deal on how the government is running the country from getting permits to publishing books.
Still it's a nice pleasant book about another culture.
November 28, 2014
Mixed feelings about this one. The insights into Chinese culture were really interesting and the author has a clear, concise and readable style and many interesting stories. Yet she jumped around in time quite a bit which was sometimes a little confusing and in many cases her lack of detail left me longing for a memoir of her quite adventurous life.
September 30, 2014
This review appeared on my blog www.gimmethatbook.com.
Eden Collinsworth has spent more time traveling and being away from home than most people you know. She is intimately familiar with China, having spent a lot of time there as a business consultant. This story is about the year she spent writing a manual for the Chinese on Western manners. Her tone is light and breezy, and she gives you the feeling that nothing fazes her.
Each chapter is titled with a subject relevant to manners, such as proper grooming, how to greet people, and how to behave at a dinner party. She shares personal anecdotes, then goes on to explain how these anecdotes relate to the writing of her book. More often than not, the chapter ends with a statement that leaves you hanging, and you eagerly go to the next chapter expecting the same thread to be picked up.
It’s not.
Her writing style is easy to read, but the subjects are many. She will lead off talking about turtles, then go into an explanation of Chinese cuisine, then end with some story seemingly irrelevant to the topics above. By the time I got to the middle of the book, I was expecting all her tales to end abruptly, and a new subject to be broached with the thinnest of segues. This is the only complaint I have about the book. Eventually a later chapter will return to the turtle, or a co worker, or the reason she was talking about her dinner party.
Collinsworth is a woman clearly used to dealing with men in a man’s world, and for that I admire her. She seems to be very lucky in her business dealings, and many opportunities landed in her lap simply as a result of being in the right place at the right time.
Some personal details, such as her then-husband, referred to as “W”, and her son’s growing up and maturing, figure prominently in the book. It’s a combination of a memoir, explanation of how her book on manners came to be written, and a Chinese history lesson.
My feelings about this book are mixed. To me, it was more about the author’s life, travels, and relationship with her family, with some background material related to Eastern vs Western manners. I came away knowing a little bit more about the Chinese mindset, but what stuck with me was how Collinsworth spent her life almost as a transient, always seeking the new experience over comfort and similarity. Perhaps the best way to review this book would be: akin to Chinese food–made up of many ingredients but not very filling over the long run. Read it for yourself and let me know what you think.
You can pick up a copy here.
I received this book from Netgalley.com in exchange for an honest review.
September 15, 2014
Not quite a memoir, not really a guide to China, and only incidentally a story of teaching Western manners in China, I Stand Corrected is a literary equivalent of dim sum, a variety of stories, anecdotes, advice, and thoughts.
As long as you aren't expecting an orderly story with a beginning and end, this is a fun book. Eden Collinsworth, whose career has taken numerous twists and turns, describes writing a book about Western manners for Chinese business people. She spent the three months (and more) that it took to write it in China, and has many stories to tell of how she learned, often the hard way, that despite globalization and increased interaction between East and West, it's still possible to have monumental international misunderstandings, sometimes daily in Eden's case.
She stops to tell stories from her past, telling about raising a multicultural son in France, China, New York, and Los Angeles. She recalls the time she went to Rwanda to see mountain gorillas, which was also not without incident.
This short book is a bit like listening to a good storyteller entertaining a group of friends over drinks.
As long as you aren't expecting an orderly story with a beginning and end, this is a fun book. Eden Collinsworth, whose career has taken numerous twists and turns, describes writing a book about Western manners for Chinese business people. She spent the three months (and more) that it took to write it in China, and has many stories to tell of how she learned, often the hard way, that despite globalization and increased interaction between East and West, it's still possible to have monumental international misunderstandings, sometimes daily in Eden's case.
She stops to tell stories from her past, telling about raising a multicultural son in France, China, New York, and Los Angeles. She recalls the time she went to Rwanda to see mountain gorillas, which was also not without incident.
This short book is a bit like listening to a good storyteller entertaining a group of friends over drinks.
January 20, 2016
The author of this book is a wealthy, white, privileged woman out to promote her other books and "cultural competency" classes. She paints an incredibly one-dimensional, degrading picture of the Chinese she writes about, as if only Americans can teach them how to function in the American business environment, when in reality the Chinese now have their own schools and travel widely, and can teach their own how to interact with Westerners for business just fine. Also, she makes several derogatory references to transpeople in this book. The author works for a "think tank" of some kind, probably conservative, that supports this type of trash, as full of half-truths and lies about the Chinese as facts, none cited. A two star rating is generous.
January 4, 2015
I enjoyed reading Eden Collinsworth's memoir about her life, especially the time she spent living and working in China. Ms. Collinsworth has had a fascinating life and has kindly shared her adventures and misadventures with us.
Written in a witty and self-deprecating style, Ms. Collinsworth entertains and educates us about the many countries she has visited. After reading her book, I felt as though I had traveled and lived in those places (France, China and others) and experienced living with the locals. Really wonderful travel writing.
If you want to have a real armchair trip around the world, this is a book to definitely read! A very good read!
Written in a witty and self-deprecating style, Ms. Collinsworth entertains and educates us about the many countries she has visited. After reading her book, I felt as though I had traveled and lived in those places (France, China and others) and experienced living with the locals. Really wonderful travel writing.
If you want to have a real armchair trip around the world, this is a book to definitely read! A very good read!
August 9, 2014
Fascinating! This was a wonderful book. It was very comical to read at times. I think young people should be receiving more instruction on manners. Many young people do not have any manners. Someday it may be difficult to teach American etiquette to the Chinese, if U.S. parents do not start teaching etiquette to their kids.
February 16, 2019
If you pick this book up (as I did) thinking it would be a book about someone's experience in China, it will come off as an irritating, poorly veiled vehicle for bragging about the author's rich upbringing, success in the business world, eccentric friends, and jet-setting lifestyle. Once you realize that the book is poorly titled, and that this is really a memoir of a woman who has led a very interesting life., structured on the framework of her work on a book of Western manners for a Chinese audience, you can settle in and enjoy her numerous stories - like sitting down at a party with the "Most Interesting Woman in the World."
August 27, 2014
A wonderful read a blend of memoir travelogue parenting &an eyewitness look at living in China for a year &have the audacity to teach the Chinese culture etiquette lessons.Eden Collinsworth a strong successful woman opens her life to us her heartbreaking divorce her life as a single parent & her life as a true professional a strong woman with a great joy for living and a terrific sense of humor.Look foward to reading about her next adventure.
October 17, 2014
Way too much completely off-topic rambling. If this had been a general autobiography, that would have been fine, but i picked it up because i wanted to read about, well, how teaching western manners in China because its own unforgettable lesson. What does climbing a volcano in Africa have to do with that?
December 30, 2014
Found it not particularly insightful or interesting, but read on to see if anything better came out of it. River Town is more insightful about interpersonal relations, and this kind of boils down to a "how cool I am" life story. Meh.
February 1, 2016
I have no idea how this woman was a successful publisher and author if this is the type of book she churns out. Sexist, transphobic, narcissistic, privileged and extremely fluffy. Not worth your time.
May 7, 2016
Wandering and disjointed. Some interesting anecdotes, but title does not accurately reflect content.
September 6, 2018
Collinsworth's narrative structure judders erratically between several threads: an asynchronous telling of her life history, an account of her life living in China writing her etiquette book, excerpts from the etiquette book itself and, perhaps worst of all, her armchair musings on everything from the difference between women and men to the influence languages have on their cultures (despite her own admission that she speaks nothing but English). Collinsworth comes off as unlikable, full of false humility and actual ignorance of her own privilege. Her life story is interesting, but even that parts of this book is difficult to follow due to her poor writing and structure.
January 3, 2021
I picked this up from a thrift store - fascinated by the topic of etiquette and desiring to better understand the growing cultural phenomenon of China as a world power. The author exceeded my expectations, delivering a wealth of cultural understanding of both East and West with self deprecating humor tossed in.
Although wandering in both memory and reality, the author took me along on the journey. Having just returned, I feel better educated as well as entertained!
Although wandering in both memory and reality, the author took me along on the journey. Having just returned, I feel better educated as well as entertained!
May 21, 2024
Although this memoir of time spent in China and the differences in etiquette is 10 years old, my guess is that most of it still holds up. Maybe feelings in China have become stronger as the strength of the country in the world's economy has increased. Collinsworth writes with empathy and humor. She seems to be able to make her way in the country (among many countries in which she has lived). This is an enjoyable memoir.
August 27, 2017
I read about half of this book and gave up. It is supposed to be about the author teaching English in China, but it's not. It is an unfocused heap of a memoir of the author's time in China and elsewhere.
July 17, 2020
I can only wonder what she thinks now!
I did learn a bit about China, but the book was all over the place . I was never quite sure what was happening, or when. Not an easy read.
I did learn a bit about China, but the book was all over the place . I was never quite sure what was happening, or when. Not an easy read.
October 28, 2020
Part memoir, part travelogue , sometimes funny, rather disjointed, but still offers insights into life outside of our own backyard.
June 12, 2021
Not what I expected but still an interesting book to read!
March 26, 2018
2.5 stars. I had great hopes in this book given my own expatriate background of living in Asia, but I was disappointed. I couldn’t tell what it was trying to be. Autobiography? Humorous take on cultural differences between east and west? An advertisement for her own book of Western etiquette? It tried too hard to be all three and was very disjointed. The author is very aware and unapologetic of her elitist lifestyle and proud of the nonconformist upbringing of her son which has allowed him to be culturally assimilated in the international world, but her superior attitude comes across as pretentious and snobbish. She loves to name drop through the book which is irritating. Her writing is very good and quite humorous at times, but her vanity throughout the book is very off-putting. I’m sure she’d be very refined and cultured were I to meet her, but I’m not sure I would like her.
June 15, 2015
While in China, a widely-traveled and successful businesswoman, Eden Collinsworth, was solicited by a Chinese publisher to write a book for Chinese businessmen on Western business etiquette. Ms. Collinsworth worked together with the Chinese publisher, and the book was translated into Chinese. The book's success in China led to a follow-up in English called I Stand Corrected (2014). The title's continuation, "How Teaching Western Manners in China Became its Own Unforgettable Lesson," informs us that this is a virtual how-it-was-written book and that this book is as much about the author herself as about writing and China. The English book is the subject of this review.
The book is organized around the lessons and content of the original Chinese book. Ms Collinsworth informs us how she organized herself to write the book and how writing the book was influenced by her background, experience, travels and family, but we also learn a great deal about Chinese etiquette, Chinese perceptions of the West, and how things get done in China.
Ms Collinsworth's analysis of the cultural differences between China and the West are perceptive. There are excellent short chapters on the rigors of the Chinese educational system (every year, 70 million high school graduates compete for 9 million university places), doing business in China, politics in China, do's and don'ts, and how business and politics are intertwined.
There are are good tips sprinkled throughout, such as the one on how to conduct yourself during a meal with a Chinese host, as well as the importance of dual-language business cards and how physically to present them to Chinese colleagues.
A potential tourist to Beijing can obtain perceptive insights on sites to see in the city, and why they are important.
And there are also gems, for example, the following on walking through old-city Bejing:
"... our walks often led us to dwindling labyrinths of narrow streets, known as hutongs, formed by rows of siheyuans, courtyard residences .... With their beautifully carved roof beams and intricately painted pillars, siheyuans [courtyard residences], some dating from the fifteenth century were owned by aristocrats .... Now they are multifamily dwellings connected to one another by interlacing lanes....The people living in hutongs seemed to me especially happy.... it became our habit to eat lunch in front of the portable woks that lined the interconnected walkways." A photographer would immediately mark this area as good for shutter-bugging.
This excerpt actually inspired me to delve a little more deeply into siheyuan architecture. I learned that The Forbidden City is the largest siheyuan complex in the world and the best example of Chinese traditional housing.
This book is a quick read, gives perspective to anyone interested in contemporary China, and is up-to-date (published in 2014). I liked it.
The book is organized around the lessons and content of the original Chinese book. Ms Collinsworth informs us how she organized herself to write the book and how writing the book was influenced by her background, experience, travels and family, but we also learn a great deal about Chinese etiquette, Chinese perceptions of the West, and how things get done in China.
Ms Collinsworth's analysis of the cultural differences between China and the West are perceptive. There are excellent short chapters on the rigors of the Chinese educational system (every year, 70 million high school graduates compete for 9 million university places), doing business in China, politics in China, do's and don'ts, and how business and politics are intertwined.
There are are good tips sprinkled throughout, such as the one on how to conduct yourself during a meal with a Chinese host, as well as the importance of dual-language business cards and how physically to present them to Chinese colleagues.
A potential tourist to Beijing can obtain perceptive insights on sites to see in the city, and why they are important.
And there are also gems, for example, the following on walking through old-city Bejing:
"... our walks often led us to dwindling labyrinths of narrow streets, known as hutongs, formed by rows of siheyuans, courtyard residences .... With their beautifully carved roof beams and intricately painted pillars, siheyuans [courtyard residences], some dating from the fifteenth century were owned by aristocrats .... Now they are multifamily dwellings connected to one another by interlacing lanes....The people living in hutongs seemed to me especially happy.... it became our habit to eat lunch in front of the portable woks that lined the interconnected walkways." A photographer would immediately mark this area as good for shutter-bugging.
This excerpt actually inspired me to delve a little more deeply into siheyuan architecture. I learned that The Forbidden City is the largest siheyuan complex in the world and the best example of Chinese traditional housing.
This book is a quick read, gives perspective to anyone interested in contemporary China, and is up-to-date (published in 2014). I liked it.
October 11, 2015
As another reviewer aptly said, I Stand Confused.
I read the entire book, displeased at the end of each chapter, but somehow hoping that in the next chapter it would all settle down and become the book I wanted it to be. The premise is fantastic: see a need in the blossoming global economy to build cross cultural bridges between the drastically different value and manner systems of the East and the West, write a book for the East about manners to address this need, observe all sorts of fascinating examples and stories along the way, write a second book for the West detailing these examples. But somehow this book just fails in every way.
Case in point, the entirety of chapter 16 is about France. And no, there are no secret ties between France and China that you have somehow missed, that would somehow explain the placement and purpose of this chapter. None. Just a whole chapter about French education, French landscape, French history, and French customs. Right in the middle of a book about China.
And a comment to explain my displeasure at the end of each chapter. Each chapter is apprx 6 pages long and covers a completely random assortment of information. For example, Chapter 17 begins with a description of the author's routine while writing the book on manners, then moves to ancient Chinese architecture, followed by a short paragraph on the current eating arrangement with her son, a longer paragraph about eating many different types of cultural meals while he was growing up in LA, some thoughts about toileting in other countries including a mention of lions in Africa, and then the chapter closes with a paragraph that begins by describing a toilet the author used in Japan and transitions at the end to a 2 sentence summary of the Chinese system of split pants for babies and young children. With that cliff hanger, the author then plunges into Chapter 18, which begins with one paragraph about a house being relocated (a house not mentioned before or after this lone paragraph), before moving on to the subject of marriage, land ownership, a theory behind China's urbanization, and then dumping you right into a brief summary of Chinese censorship and end with the idea that the Chinese now want to travel. Note that neither of these chapters, nor the preceding chapter of France, have mentioned the subject of the book. Three chapters in a row, on subjects not at all tied into the main narrative, in the middle of the book. I grew frustrated.
I finally decided that perhaps she wrote the entire book as one long rambling blog post and someone else added the chapter delineations after the fact, as best as they were able.
I read the entire book, displeased at the end of each chapter, but somehow hoping that in the next chapter it would all settle down and become the book I wanted it to be. The premise is fantastic: see a need in the blossoming global economy to build cross cultural bridges between the drastically different value and manner systems of the East and the West, write a book for the East about manners to address this need, observe all sorts of fascinating examples and stories along the way, write a second book for the West detailing these examples. But somehow this book just fails in every way.
Case in point, the entirety of chapter 16 is about France. And no, there are no secret ties between France and China that you have somehow missed, that would somehow explain the placement and purpose of this chapter. None. Just a whole chapter about French education, French landscape, French history, and French customs. Right in the middle of a book about China.
And a comment to explain my displeasure at the end of each chapter. Each chapter is apprx 6 pages long and covers a completely random assortment of information. For example, Chapter 17 begins with a description of the author's routine while writing the book on manners, then moves to ancient Chinese architecture, followed by a short paragraph on the current eating arrangement with her son, a longer paragraph about eating many different types of cultural meals while he was growing up in LA, some thoughts about toileting in other countries including a mention of lions in Africa, and then the chapter closes with a paragraph that begins by describing a toilet the author used in Japan and transitions at the end to a 2 sentence summary of the Chinese system of split pants for babies and young children. With that cliff hanger, the author then plunges into Chapter 18, which begins with one paragraph about a house being relocated (a house not mentioned before or after this lone paragraph), before moving on to the subject of marriage, land ownership, a theory behind China's urbanization, and then dumping you right into a brief summary of Chinese censorship and end with the idea that the Chinese now want to travel. Note that neither of these chapters, nor the preceding chapter of France, have mentioned the subject of the book. Three chapters in a row, on subjects not at all tied into the main narrative, in the middle of the book. I grew frustrated.
I finally decided that perhaps she wrote the entire book as one long rambling blog post and someone else added the chapter delineations after the fact, as best as they were able.
February 14, 2017
Three stars, because I am so deeply ambivalent about this book.
On the one hand: I kind of like the author's personality, and I am certain that she has some interesting stories to tell.
On the other hand: I am not sure she's really telling the interesting stories here. I want, you know, the deep dive into the Chinese publishing industry, the self-conscious sociological analysis of the bits of life in modern China that she saw, some real telling insights about cross-cultural communication/interaction/what have you. Something.
On the third hand: the premise is very interesting, and she did something very interesting with the structure.
On the fourth hand: reductio ad Confucius and also, have to put some flesh on this structure.
On the fifth hand: I think it might be good for the author to have a good stiff drink, and also go outside a bit more often.
It is a thing I am happy to have read, but I'm still not sure if I liked it.
On the one hand: I kind of like the author's personality, and I am certain that she has some interesting stories to tell.
On the other hand: I am not sure she's really telling the interesting stories here. I want, you know, the deep dive into the Chinese publishing industry, the self-conscious sociological analysis of the bits of life in modern China that she saw, some real telling insights about cross-cultural communication/interaction/what have you. Something.
On the third hand: the premise is very interesting, and she did something very interesting with the structure.
On the fourth hand: reductio ad Confucius and also, have to put some flesh on this structure.
On the fifth hand: I think it might be good for the author to have a good stiff drink, and also go outside a bit more often.
It is a thing I am happy to have read, but I'm still not sure if I liked it.
October 3, 2014
Of Orchestration and Harmony
Writing in an effortless voice is exceedingly hard work. Introducing multiple perspectives and storylines and motivating your readers to stick with you through convoluted passageways and high-altitude soaring adds several degrees of difficulty.
And yet in this slender volume Eden Collinsworth has managed to draw together a primer on Western etiquette (complete with discourse on the etymology of the word), hiccups and triumphs of being an American abroad, and the joys and challenges of crafting a meaningful life for herself and her son.
In less capable hands, these multiple story lines and perspectives would end up in a sorry, knotted mess, but Collinsworth is able to tease out interrelationships and heightened meaning, whether she's illustrating handshake protocol and personal space or detailing the faux pas of using a business card as a nail pick. (Hint: Don't do it. Ever. And when you are Asia-bound, always bring four times as many business cards as you think you will need.)
I suspect that Collinsworth's seemingly breezy style may initially be off-putting for some; my advice would be to withhold judgment until you've reached at least the halfway point of this book. This should provide you with enough of a sense of her take on things that are familiar to you to evaluate how you'll perceive what she offers about the unfamiliar.
For example, while I can't vouch for all of the China nuggets she shares, enough of the components matched my knowledge and experience to make me comfortable with the bedrock of her message. Incidentally, the Xian farmer she mentions? I have his autograph, too, as well as countless photos of the terra cotta warriors, both from that trip and successive visits.
ARC provided by Amazon Vine program
Writing in an effortless voice is exceedingly hard work. Introducing multiple perspectives and storylines and motivating your readers to stick with you through convoluted passageways and high-altitude soaring adds several degrees of difficulty.
And yet in this slender volume Eden Collinsworth has managed to draw together a primer on Western etiquette (complete with discourse on the etymology of the word), hiccups and triumphs of being an American abroad, and the joys and challenges of crafting a meaningful life for herself and her son.
In less capable hands, these multiple story lines and perspectives would end up in a sorry, knotted mess, but Collinsworth is able to tease out interrelationships and heightened meaning, whether she's illustrating handshake protocol and personal space or detailing the faux pas of using a business card as a nail pick. (Hint: Don't do it. Ever. And when you are Asia-bound, always bring four times as many business cards as you think you will need.)
I suspect that Collinsworth's seemingly breezy style may initially be off-putting for some; my advice would be to withhold judgment until you've reached at least the halfway point of this book. This should provide you with enough of a sense of her take on things that are familiar to you to evaluate how you'll perceive what she offers about the unfamiliar.
For example, while I can't vouch for all of the China nuggets she shares, enough of the components matched my knowledge and experience to make me comfortable with the bedrock of her message. Incidentally, the Xian farmer she mentions? I have his autograph, too, as well as countless photos of the terra cotta warriors, both from that trip and successive visits.
ARC provided by Amazon Vine program
January 5, 2015
I Stand Confused.
I don't know why this book was written.
As a memoir, the author goes out of her way to obfuscates many parts of her life. The ex-husband is only referred to as "W", we never find out how or why they met and married, and not too sure of why they divorced.
As a history or commentary on China, it is amazingly lacking in originality or insight. There are the obligatory mentions of the Opium War, the Great Leap Forward and the Cultural Revolution, but only as if in passing as the author clearly does not have the necessary understanding on the depth of Chinese history to offer any other than what she gleamed from Wikipedia. So we are left with only the author's anecdotal impressions of life in modern China, from someone who does not even speak the language. Does the Chinese really eat duck feet marinated in blood? I believe that is an urban myth.
Finally as book on Business Etiquette, the author keeps telling us she is not really qualified on the subject. But despite being no Emily Post, her book on etiquette becomes a bestseller in China and she is offered to speak in Universities and provide training courses to the next generation of Chinese. Ah, I finally get it! Self promotion. That is the purpose of this book. It proves that you can becoming an expert on anything if you write a book about it!
I don't know why this book was written.
As a memoir, the author goes out of her way to obfuscates many parts of her life. The ex-husband is only referred to as "W", we never find out how or why they met and married, and not too sure of why they divorced.
As a history or commentary on China, it is amazingly lacking in originality or insight. There are the obligatory mentions of the Opium War, the Great Leap Forward and the Cultural Revolution, but only as if in passing as the author clearly does not have the necessary understanding on the depth of Chinese history to offer any other than what she gleamed from Wikipedia. So we are left with only the author's anecdotal impressions of life in modern China, from someone who does not even speak the language. Does the Chinese really eat duck feet marinated in blood? I believe that is an urban myth.
Finally as book on Business Etiquette, the author keeps telling us she is not really qualified on the subject. But despite being no Emily Post, her book on etiquette becomes a bestseller in China and she is offered to speak in Universities and provide training courses to the next generation of Chinese. Ah, I finally get it! Self promotion. That is the purpose of this book. It proves that you can becoming an expert on anything if you write a book about it!
March 10, 2016
The author may have written an etiquette book for Chinese businessmen but for her Western readers she has written an unusual travelogue, showing her in unexpected places and in unusual situations, from having a turtle in her bathtub to flying off to Paris to work and to send her son to school. She left more unanswered questions for me than answers. Where did she get the money for her travels? (It's none of my business, of course, but still I wonder.) Can anyone really be as talented as she and work in any country she wants doing anything she wants? (That's the way it seems in her account of her travels and her varied business roles.) What eventually happened to her son, Gilliam, a central character in her life and in this book? This is the kind of person with whom one would want to spend at least one day, going with her from one adventure to another. (Her experiences may not involve swinging from jungle vines but they seem as treacherous and extraordinary.) When I finished reading the book, I had to search for more information about the author online to satisfy my curiosity. I was disappointed in finding little. Perhaps she will write a sequel to this book, filling in all the blanks she left in this one.
March 21, 2016
"When world traveler Collinsworth decides to spread Western etiquette to China in 2011, she learns more about Chinese customs than she had anticipated. She discovers to her surprise that "everything is slightly illegal in China," from legal documents to business transactions. She joins a friend for a business meeting, whereupon she is promptly offered $20,000 to write a letter to Angelina Jolie-simply because she was American, it was assumed she knew the famous actress. Collinsworth finds that small talk and compliments are particularly difficult to tackle: an attempt by a host to compliment his guest goes awry when he calls her fat, which is considered a sign of prosperity in China. In between these faux pas, Collinsworth interjects her own lessons that address the nature of problem, so that readers can avoid such mishaps. The juxtaposition of these cultures can be funny or, at times, cringe-worthy but overall this is an entertaining take on life as a foreigner in China. " - Publishers Weekly
If you have ever struggled with assembly instructions that seemed unintelligible, or attempted to understand the mores and folkways of another culture, you will enjoy this book.
If you have ever struggled with assembly instructions that seemed unintelligible, or attempted to understand the mores and folkways of another culture, you will enjoy this book.
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