I haven't read that book which says in its very title that men are from Mars and women are from Venus. From somewhere, however, I had learned its basic premise: that the differences between men and women are so vast that it would seem that they are creatures from different planets.
I am a married man and it is not infrequent that my wife would, say, raise a howl of violent exasperation about something I did which I find completely normal and ordinary. On the other hand, I never cease to wonder how she, after talking with or meeting someone, would have an inexplicable change of mood for something which, on the surface of the previous conversation or meeting, simply doesn't deserve any such reaction. If the premise is true that men and women are from different planets, I imagine women with antennae like cockroaches, going hither and thither as they interact with people, picking up hidden signals which men simply have no way of perceiving. Then her mood will be dictated by these hidden signals and this could be a problem when she's with her man because the latter is not equipped with a similar set of antennae capable of picking up such invisible waves. Or maybe forget about cockroaches. Think of men and women as two sets of armies, one equipped with a powerful radar system and the other does not have any. So while the women (with the radar) are already panicking because enemy planes, as seen from their radar, are coming, the others (the men) are still asleep in their barracks, hearing nothing unusual, their lookouts seeing nothing but the clear, glorious, early morning sky.
"The Heat of the Day" was written by one such antennaed creature from Venus with her radar in full blast (is it relevant to say here, as mentioned in the brief introductory bio of the book itself, that she outlived her husband by 21 years? Is this strange sensitivity of women, and the difficulty of coping with this, the reason why there are more widows than widowers?). A love story in the backdrop of world war two London, complete with mystery, espionage and a love triangle, the reader (especially, I imagine, those like me from Mars) would be distracted from following the plot by massive introspective digressions which seemingly come from nowhere and everywhere, as well as those highflown dialogues which make it sound as if the characters are communicating wordlessly through their minds, like aliens from outer space, and not verbalizing them through their mouths.
Like this scene (among the many examples I can give!) where the principal female protagonist named Stella(Victor's widow, now Robert's lover, has a son--Roderick--in the British army) had just been brought to a bar by a friend who now leaves. She then turns briefly away to wave goodbye to her friend. THAT brief act of turning away and waving goodbye to her departing friend was enough for Elizabeth Bowen to go into this:
"That gesture of good-bye, so perfunctory, was a finalness not to appear till later. It comprehended the room and everybody, everything in it which had up to now counted as her life: it was an unconscious announcement of the departure she was about to take--a first and last wave, across widening water, from a liner. Remembered, her fleeting sketch of a gesture came to look prophetic; for ever she was to see, photographed as though it had been someone else's, her hand up. The bracelet slipping down and sleeve falling back, against a dissolving background of lights and faces, were vestiges, and the last, of her solidity."
I don't know if this has a sequel, but in this book I do not remember Stella having such a dramatic departure from a liner across widening water. Now, in this other scene, Stella is with the other guy, Harrison, inside her apartment. She tells him to get her a glass of milk. Harrison briefly leaves the room and goes to the other room where the milk is. Elizabeth Bowen then ambushes her reader with this:
"Left like this in the room with the empty chairs, she took the opportunity to breathe. Harrison became nothing more than a person she had for the moment succeeded in getting rid of. She looked from the armchair proper to Robert to the armchair commandeered by Harrison, but found herself thinking of neither of these--of, rather, Victor, her vanished husband. Why Victor of now? One could only suppose that the apparently forgotten beginning of any story was unforgettable; perpetually one was subject to the sense of there having had to be a beginning SOMEWHERE. Like the lost first sheet of a letter or missing first pages of a book, the beginning kept on suggesting what must have been its nature. One never was out of reach of the power of what had been written first. Call it what you liked, call it a miscarried love, it imparted, or was always ready and liable to impart, the nature of an alternative, attempted recovery or enforced second start to whatever followed. The beginning, in which was conceived the end, could not but continue to shape the middle part of the story, so that none of the realizations along that course were what had been expected, quite whole, quite final. That first path, taken to be a false start--who was to know, after all, where it might not have led? She saw, for an instant, Roderick's father's face, its look suspended and non-committal. In this room, in which love in the person of Robert had been so living, this former face had not shown itself till tonight--now, she was penetrated not only by as it were first awareness of Victor's death but by worse, by the knowledge of his having been corrupted before death by undoings and denials of all love. She had had it in her to have been an honest woman and borne more children; she had been capable of more virtue than the succeeding years had left her able to show. Her young marriage had not been an experiment; it is the young who cannot afford to experiment--everything is at stake. The time of her marriage had been a time after war; her own desire to find herself in some embrace from life had been universal, at work in the world, the time whose creature she was. For a deception, she could no more blame the world than one can blame any fellow-sufferer: in these last twenty of its and her own years she had to watch in it what she felt in her--a clear-sightedly helpless progress towards disaster. The fateful course of her fatalistic century seemed more and more her own: together had she and it arrived at the testing extremities of their noonday. Neither had lived before..."
Now, how many minutes would transpire before someone would finish thinking of these or--to the reader--reading them AND comprehending what they say? Certainly longer than the few seconds it'll take for Harrison to get the milk in the adjoining room. Yet it was only after all the above that Harrison reappeared with the glass of milk and even this reappearance reminded Stella, this time, of "her own extremity (that) was in this being bargained for."
Force me to read novels like this for six months and by the end of that time I imagine I'll be ready to die by my own hand. Let's see now how Elizabeth Bowen imagines her characters talking. Here is the scene where Robert, Stella's lover, finally admits to her that he's working/spying for the enemy (the Germans). I'm rewriting the dialogue like that in a play to highlight the exchanges and so you can judge for yourself if people in planet earth really talk like this in real life and in real time:
Stella: "...Were you never frightened?"
Robert: "Of getting caught?"
Stella: "I meant, of what you've been doing?"
Robert: " I?--no, the opposite: it utterly undid fear. It bred my father out of me, gave me a new heredity. I went slow at first--it was stupefying to be beginning to know what confidence could be. To know what I knew, to keep my knowing unknown, unknown all the time to be acting on it--I tell you, everything fell into place around me. Something of my own?--No, no, much better than that: any neurotic can make himself his corner. The way out?--no, better than that: the way on! You think, in me this was simply wanting to get my hand on the controls?"
Stella: " I don't think I think."
Robert: "Well, it's not; it's not a question of that. Who wants to monkey about? To feel control is enough. It's a very much bigger thing to be under orders."
Stella: "We are all under orders; what is there new in that?"
Robert: "Yes, can you wonder they love war. But I don't mean orders, I mean order."
Stella: "So you are with the enemy."
Robert: "Naturally they're the enemy; they're facing us with what has got to be the conclusion. They won't last, but it will."
Stella: "I can't believe you."
Robert: "You could."
Stella: "It's not just that they're the enemy, but they're horrible--specious, unthinkable, grotesque."
Robert: "Oh, THEY--evidently! But you judge it by them. And in birth, remember, anything is grotesque."
Stella: "They're afraid, too."
Robert: "Of course: they have started something. You may not like it, but it's the beginning of a day. A day on our scale."
And her is Stella asking Robert why he had sided with the enemy and the latter giving his reasons:
Stella: "What is it you are, then, a revolutionary? No, counter-revolutionary? You think revolutions are coming down in the world? Once, they used to seem an advance, each time--you think NOT that, any more, now? After each, first the loss of what had been gained, then the loss of more? So that now revolution coming could only be the greatest convulsion so far, with the least meaning of all? Yet nobody can rid themselves of the idea that SOMETHING'S coming. What is this present state of the world, then--a false pregnancy?
Robert: "No."
Stella: "No, I see you couldn't think that, or you wouldn't have...You know, Robert, for anybody DOING anything so definite, you talk vaguely. Wildness and images. That may have been my bringing my feeling in. But to me it's as though there still were something you'd never formulated."
Robert: "This is the first time I've ever talked."
Stella: "Never talked to the others--the others you're in this with?"
Robert: "You imagine we meet to swap ideas?"
Stella: "But then in that case, all the more you've thought."
Robert: "All the more I've thought. More and more the outcome of thinking because you never can talk is never to talk. The thing isolating you isolates itself. It sets up a tension you hope may somehow break itself, but that you can't break. You don't know where thought began; it goes round in circles. TALK has got to begin--where? How am I to know how to talk, after so much thought? Any first time, is one much good? Unformulated--what was?"
Stella: "I don't know. Or perhaps, missing?"
Robert: "How am I to know what's missing in my own thought? I'm committed to it. What did you want, then--brass tacks?"
Stella: "Though they are always something. You are out for the enemy to win because you think they have something? What?"
Robert: "They have something. This war's just too much bloody quibbling about some thing that's predecided itself. Either side's winning would stop the war; only their side's winning would stop the quibbling. I want to cackle cut--Well, what have I still not said?"
Stella: "I still don't know. Never mind."
And neither do I know yet. I say, too: Never mind! Only after I've stopped reading that these characters stopped their quibbling!