Body Clutter: Love Your Body, Love Yourself

by Leanne Ely, Marla Cilley

Join FlyLady and Leanne as they teach you how to adapt the basic principles of the FlyLady system and apply them to your Body Clutter, the most personal clutter of all. They do not preach at you about losing weight; they help you discover how you found it in the first place. This book teaches you how to use BabySteps and Routines to fit your own body.

Dealing with your Body Clutter is not about the "perfect" diet; it is about sound nutrition, personal discovery and a journey that only you can take. It's not about the fat, it's about life. Once you are able to recognize the mental clutter behind the Body Clutter, you will be able to release it, keep it off and FLY like never before.

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help, Health, Reference, Psychology, Diets, Adult

228 pages, Paperback

First published October 1, 2005

Reviews

[Christina · Rating 3 out of 5]

I saw this at the library, I've heard of 'FlyLady', and it looked like a quick read, so I decided to try it. It didn't really relate to my weight issues. I'm definitely overweight, but I believe it's because I enjoy food so much that I'll eat myself sick and I'm not committed to exercise. This book seems to be more directed toward people who use food to cope with depression, anger and abuse. I was going to give it only 2 stars, but then I came to a couple of ideas that resonate with me...

Rather than deciding I'm going to be healthy all at once ("starting tomorrow - and every day for the rest of my life - I'm going to get up early, exercise for at least 45 minutes, drink 10-12 cups of water, have a salad for lunch, get at least 3 antioxidant-rich vegetables, do 20 minutes of deep breathing exercises, eat more raw foods, grow my own organic vegetables, stop nibbling, chew thoroughly, go for a walk after dinner, not eat after 7:00PM, ...."), it makes more sense to focus on one or two changes at a time and work them into my routine until they become a permanent part of my life. Every small change helps! There is a chapter about working small changes into your routine little by little.

Anyway, this is turning into more of a journal entry than a book review. If your weight issues are caused by unhealthy relationship with food, I recommend Intuitive Eating: A Revolutionary Program That Works. If you don't have a knowledge of basic nutrition, I recommend The Schwarzbein Principle: The Truth About Losing Weight, Being Healthy, and Feeling Younger. If you have emotional issues/anger to deal with, I recommend Healing Mind, Healthy Woman: Using the Mind-Body Connection to Manage Stress and Take Control of Your Life. If you want to read a quick 'feel-good' book, this one will do. Both authors come across as very real and personable, and it's nice to hear honest stories from women who've been there. On a side note, there is a lot of 'FlyLady' slang, which I'm not familiar with. You would probably enjoy the book more if you were familiar with her other book or website.

[Mary · Rating 1 out of 5]

I wish Goodreads allowed reviewers to give a negative rating, but since one star is as low as I can go, so be it. I've been familiar with Marla Cilley's FlyLady e-mails and home cleaning and organizing concepts for some time. I have chronic health issues so it can be very difficult to keep up and I liked how some aspects of her routine allow for setting timers for short bursts of cleaning. However, I am also confused as to what her stance regarding self-care and self-esteem is, considering what I've read recently in her content.

I was looking for her books in the local library system. I was only able to find the "Body Clutter" book. Yes, I am overweight and as I said, I have a host of physical and menthal health issues that I deal with on a daily basis. It took a LONG time to reach a point where I was happy in my own skin and accept that my body and brain do not work as well as I would like them to. But I do accept myself as I am these days, and while I sometimes/often get frustrated at what I can no longer do, overall my life is a positive one. Yet, I read in this book just this morning -- before I angrily slammed it shut and put it aside -- that making "excuses" for not taking care of your weight, or as it was put in the book, "you have to work your Franny off at the gym", are "character flaws that exposed a serious deficit in my own personal integrity". Wait -- did she just shame herself (and her readers) for being overweight? Why yes, she certainly did! And that is bull, ladies. Plain and simple. Love yourself better than that. (This is on page 40 in my copy of the book from the library, for your reference, but please, don't bother yourself over this nonsense.)

It was just earlier today, before I read that passage in the book, that I read a recent e-mail, in which a frazzled mom of young children wrote in and asked for advice in how she was going to be able to juggle everything. I felt the response from FlyLady was VERY judgmental. For instance, the mom said she wears croc shoes since they are most comfortable for her, yet FlyLady insisted that she must wear lace up shoes every day. This is foolishness. I have an ankle that rolls due to physical deformities and a past car accident. I have to wear a walking boot and use a cane when I go out. In the house, I wear supportive house shoes with high sides, which slip on my feet as I have trouble bending down due to lordosis and other back problems. So I've never paid much attention to her focus on wearing lace up shoes every day. But to shame someone over it? Someone who is clearly struggling and emotionally wrought over trying to do her best for her family? Shame on you, FlyLady, for on the one hand telling your readers they are fine right where they are and on the other judging and criticizing them and shaming them for not doing everything your way!

Ladies (and gents), you ARE fine right where you are. Do your best. Take each day as it comes. And don't let ANYONE tell you that you are not "enough", ever! And wear whatever darn shoes you want to. Unbelievable.

[Desiree · Rating 3 out of 5]

There is a lot of good stuff in here. ESPECIALLY about perfectionism. And baby steps. Much like SparkPeople, this book says "don't go all in all at once! You'll just give up!" ...and that's so true.

One might prefer to be familiar with at least FlyLady before reading it, but no matter.

Some of the great cathartic writing here is somewhat obscured by the blog-like format (switching between two writers, often repeating past statements/stories word-for-word or summarizing when it was only twenty pages ago!) but still, this totally made me start doing a bunch of little things that I ought to be doing and haven't been.

It's definitely geared toward your average obese American who has never read a nutrition label. Which is certainly not me, who has been obsessively researching nutrition for ten years and obsessively exercising for two, but I still found it helpful, even tangentially. (My sink was shined for the first time in YEARS last night :) )

[D · Rating 5 out of 5]

There are so many diet books on the market. There are so many ways to be constantly reminded of how you are not eating and exercising correctly. Fly Lady goes beyond the obvious. She delves into other areas we must all consider: socially, mentally, physically, etc... This book has gems of information that are really not addressed in most diet/nutrition/exercise books. It is worth reading slowly and taking notes. Each person is different, and this book addresses way more reasons that could sabotage weight loss goals. To me it was also inspiring. She mentioned dressing for the body you have in an ATTRACTIVE way. Your number does not dictate your beauty. You should only wear items and colors that make yourself happy. I rated this book five stars because if you keep the book, and your life situation changes, you can always go back to remind yourself how to handle the stresses of life that may be keeping you from your goals.

[Laura · Rating 3 out of 5]

I actually have not finished, it will take me awhile if I even do. It is not very captivating, and they go on and on with the stories before getting to the point. Just like FlyLady's 8 million emails a day. These kind of books, I would rather a short story and then get to the point of the chapter already! However, great concept.

[Laura D]

so far, I have found this book to be a lot of filler with little really said. Can they get to the point already!
For me there is too much juvenile cutesy, cutesy and not enough good hard advice and practical steps.

[Savanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

One of the beautiful, terrible things of knowing someone for a long time is that they know all of your weaknesses and foibles. Take this January, for instance, when I was freaking out about my recent weight gain. M’s response was something along the lines of, “Hmm. Ill bet is has something to do with the mystery of where all the veggie corn dogs went.” No, I’m kidding. M patiently listens when I get overemotional about gaining weight, but she is also not afraid to call me out on the fact that I tend to use eating as a coping mechanism. And so, after I recently hit the highest weight I have ever been, I freaked out and re-rejoined Weight Watchers. M bought me this book.

M loves the FLY Lady, aka Marla Cilley. She frequently cites the FLY lady as having turned her life around, having convinced her to love herself and having revolutionized the way M cleans. I read the website. I was… antagonistic. Cilley’s main mantra is that we have to let go of our inner perfectionist, because no one can be perfect. Thus, you will constantly be comparing yourself to an impossible standard, you will start to feel down and you will give up. Cilley applies this logic to cleaning, housework, family tactical planning, and (in this book) dieting.

If you have any sort of issue with food, I suggest you pick this book up. The ideas can get a little repetitive sometimes, but I think that over-eaters have spent so long negatively hard-wiring our brains that repetition is possibly the only way to get through. This is not a diet book. Instead, it’s more of an attitude makeover towards food. The biggest message I took away from the book was this: aren’t you worth taking care of? Then make the right choice for your health, even if it’s just a tiny choice.
I accept that information. It’s really just the aversion to perfectionism that I am adverse to. The idea that I might try to stifle my inner perfectionist shuts down my brain. Maybe I’m just thinking in too many extremes, but in my mind the projected time span between “ignoring my inner perfectionist” and “dropping out of law school and living on my couch in my pajamas forever” is about three days. But I can also already hear Future M defending her champion, telling me that deciding to not hold yourself to an unreasonable standard does not equate giving up on all achievements or self-improvement. All I need to do is accept that I am a human who gets tired, has a penchant for carbohydrates, and should probably exercise just a bit more (especially as I do really enjoy exercise when I do it). Knowing these things about myself and accepting them will allow me to make better choices about my health.

I should also note that there are these journal exercises at the back of each chapter that are designed to help you figure out why you overeat. What emotional need are you looking to satisfy? What food memories do you have? Stuff like that. I did not do the journal exercises this go round, but will once I go back through the book again in a few months. I’m also going to warn you that this book’s plan has you writing down everything you eat, so be forewarned if you get weird about that (remember— perfectionism is a BAD thing).

Rating: 4 stars- This will be on my non-fiction, re-read guide pile. However, I am still reluctant to let go of my inner perfectionist. Sorry FLY Lady. I’m working on it, but I’m not there yet. I do think that anyone on Weight Watchers should check this book out though— there’s a lot of overlap about the attitude towards food stuff.

[Gretchen · Rating 2 out of 5]

Body Clutter is a really interesting approach to weight loss. It’s not a ‘diet’ book, because there’s no real rules or guidelines. Like Flylady’s approach to housecleaning, it’s more about the idea of taking your goals and breaking them down into manageable pieces, which she calls ‘babysteps’, to get rid of ‘body clutter’ – her name for excess weight. The book also addresses some of the emotional issues that are behind weight gain for some people. None of the book is particularly in-depth – it’s a quick read and has a conversational feel to it, but there’s a lot in each chapter that could be explored in greater depth if you choose. The drawback of this style is that the writing is not particularly polished, and it is riddled with popular health myths that may or may not have any scientific grounding

Throughout the book there’s a peculiar tension between the message of “accept your body the way it is” and the idea that being overweight is shameful, disgusting, and unpleasant, including a section about “the realities of body clutter’. Overall the tone seems to be less about true body acceptance than about a kinder, gentler approach to getting thinner.

[Julie Ditton · Rating 1 out of 5]

About 2 decades ago, as a mom with two young children, I found the Flylady.net website and the common sense advise about house keeping helped me get my home in order. Her stance tbat you can't organize clutter, you can only going it helped me bit by bit get rid of the stuff that was no longer useful or loved. She is full of useful steps that help one babysits themselves out of CHAOS (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome.) Whereas I highly recommend her website and her first book, "Sink Reflectons", This book was very disappointing. It promises a way to babystep your way to shed body clutter, but really only delivered rambling, repetitive personal stories. It is aimed at obese women who eat to find comfort. This woman will find help from reading the author's personal stories. The average woman who is merely overweight, but not morbidly obese, will be better served by some other book.

[Melody · Rating 2 out of 5]

I think the author means to give you new, useful information. But it was neither for me. A bit of a waste of time. But now its off my shelf and there's room for another book.

[Janene · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was OKAY. Maybe someone else would get more out of it. I didn't find it to be all that helpful.

[Lysha · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this book a year or so ago and honestly I don't remember it!

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is like Flylady home organizing applied to your body. Emphasis on self care, it’s almost like an early book on intuitive eating, but not nearly as good as newer books on intuitive eating. It does veer into body shaming (I mean she calls fat ‘body clutter’) but it’s weirdly good in ways—you have to enjoy the folksy tone of the fly lady. I have no idea why I find her engaging. It’s like low threshold life coaching or something. The emphasis on taking small steps towards improving your diet and getting active is good for sure.

[Dee Rodden · Rating 2 out of 5]

Someone had recently pointed me to the Fly Lady website for cleaning. It is kind of "A LOT" but of you read through it, there is a framework you can customize to suit yourself. It really is helpful.

I thought this book might be kind of like the cleaning method. Providing a good framework that you can then build to fit into your schedule and life. It is more just a rehashing of the same old advice -- eat more healthy things than junk and move more than sit. Fat did not appear overnight and it won't disappear that fast either.

[Christina Wooff · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love this book.

Years ago, my husband introduced me to her concepts of a clean house. But with this book, I liked the concepts of baby steps and taking this journey of losing weight one small step at a time. I love that she says that need to love ourselves first and not be so perfect when losing weight. She says perfection does not work, and I completely agree with the authors.

[Christine Somers · Rating 3 out of 5]

Body Clutter is a self-help weight loss book that applies FlyLady's key home care ideas to losing weight. FlyLady and The Dinner Diva tell personal stories to highlight how each one applied the concepts of Baby Steps and Routine to help break the cycle of self abuse through food. My favorite word picture from the books it linking the bathroom scale to a check books. Warm and kind women who want to help others live a more peaceful life.

[Maria Giannopoulos Hartofilis · Rating 3 out of 5]

There is nothing truly groundbreaking here; but both authors’ personal stories make you want to root for them and adopt some of the baby steps they recommend. Loved the chapter titles “Excuses, Excuses” and the little easy swaps they sprinkled throughout their book. Again, nothing new here, but a loving delivery from two women who want women to feel like their best selves. Love the emphasis on the priority of self love!

[V2adams · Rating 5 out of 5]

Since I've read other books by Marla Cilley, aka The Fly Lady, I decided to read this one also. It's not very large, but it did have a lot of really good information in it. This book talks about how it's hard to lose weight until you change the way that you think and believe (body clutter). Marla Cilley and Leanne Ely both give lots of advise based on things they have been through in their lives. I found that I enjoyed this book more than I thought I would.

[Eva · Rating 3 out of 5]

I got a few pointers from the book...
a. HALT...Hunger, Anger, Loneliness, Tired When you feel like eating, ask yourself the acronym HALT to determine why.
b. Liked the questions they asked in the beginning to get you thinking about why you are eating too much.
It is all about baby steps which Flylady advocates for her house cleaning as well.

[Hilary (A Wytch's Book Review) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not by the same person/people but this along with Naturally Thin provides a great basis for losing weight sensibly, no crash diets, no only eat certain things or at certain times - just a gentle reminder that it has taken years for the weight to go on and if you want to lose it then do it gradually and with a system that will work for the rest of your life.

[Charlotte · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is based on the Flylady presmise of decluttering your house but is about extra weight. I like that it suggests baby steps and also says a lot about perfectionism and procrastination.
There are a lot of useful suggestions on how to be healthy again including how to get rid of anger and resentments.

[Cherri · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was very helpful as the “clutter” (fat) we put on our bodies is not unlike the clutter in our homes. The authors look into why we add body clutter as well as give practical advice on ways to begin ridding the clutter.

[Lori Inouye · Rating 4 out of 5]

A practical book to FLYing and loving yourself just as you are. Some of the nutrition information is dated but the bulk of the book will give you practical tips to "baby step" your way to better, healthier habits.

[Brooke · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loved the journal prompts in this!

[Connie R · Rating 5 out of 5]

LOVE THIS BOOK!!!

I definitely recommend this book. It puts it in simple terms - people tend to make things so hard, these days. FLYing!!!

[Carla · Rating 3 out of 5]

I am a fan of "The FlyLady" & there are some worthwhile tips & strategies in this book, but I found it basic enough to skim-read it.

[Kimberly · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very helpful information

[Jane Lee]

it was okay. I thought it was her fly lady method book so I borrowed it on libby. spoiler it was not. I read half of it and then skimmed the rest. doesn't really apply to me.

[Lori · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you Marla and Leanne! Everybody needs to FLY!

[Judy M. Taylor · Rating 5 out of 5]

love this book

Very encouraging and these authors speak the truth! I have read other books by these books and I highly recommend them.